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The company is not shitty but the managers are with the company for close to 2 decades so they have old school mentality when it comes to people management. They follow transactional than transformational mgmt philosophy. They may not even know their management structure

[–]jh1871 117 points118 points  (10 children)

Had a similar situation a year or two ago. Was the hardest worker in the company (highest amount of daily calls in medical sales) and they called me in at 6 months for review. Put me on probation. Worst part is the misspelled my last name on the form.

I was pissed, but I kept frame. Asked lots of probing questions and showed legitimate concern. Went back to my desk and thought about it for a few minutes, honestly feeling insulted.

Went back to my manager 10 or so minutes after the meeting and asked for a copy of the documents. I was calm and collected, but it was obvious I was very concerned. She handed me the copy and went back to my desk.

Got a call about an hour later from the owner of the company. My manager must have called him. He told me on the phone to not take the probation seriously and that he wanted me to stay a part of the company. I was taken off probation shortly after.

If they flex on you, let them know you have value that will be respected elsewhere. It’s just like with females.

[–]bookloverphile 6 points7 points  (4 children)

Whats your definition of frame in this situation?

[–]jh1871 34 points35 points  (3 children)

Well it’s obviously an interesting situation considering the power dynamic that is baked into a employer/employee relationship.

In my particular case I knew I was a hard worker, highly professional, and respectful. I was failing to get respect back in this case. But I was calm and interested in the situation, but had self respect and knew the probation wasn’t warranted and was a strong arm tactic.

I was obviously pissed in the moment and contemplating quitting (wouldn’t make the decision quickly/that day though) and wanted a copy of the forms to read later when I was alone. My frame in this case was rooted in my faith in myself, knowing their actions weren’t a reflection of my value. The interest and behavior I exhibited hinted to the fact that I was insulted and potentially planning to leave, which would have hurt the company. I think they saw this and that’s why the owner tried to do damage control.

[–]bookloverphile 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Very good example of “holding frame”

[–]mntefrsh 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Agree. Stay within yourself.

[–]effyouasshole 1 point2 points  (0 children)

considering the power dynamic that is baked into a employer/employee relationship.

If you see your employer having power over you, then you're doing something wrong. You should view your relationship as being equals.

A man who is great at his career should always have options for leaving this job and going to another. Additionally, he should always be on solid financial footing, so being out of work for a few months (or longer) shouldn't be a problem.

[–]rpMadler 6 points7 points  (0 children)

If they flex on you, let them know you have value that will be respected elsewhere. It’s just like with females

Abundance mentality.

Something else to think about is whether you're getting anything out of this job other than a paycheck. Obviously the paycheck is important, but especially if you're early in your career, are you learning your craft/profession and are you building your network?

[–]Andgelyo 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So they basically put you on probation for absolutely no reason? Just to make you work harder or as a scare tactic? Damn, your company sounds hard core. Also, what’s up with female bosses being so bitchy?

[–]RockNRollMachine33 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Your boss won't care nor respect you if you're the loyal hardworker. But he will respect you if you can instill dread in him by having interviews for other jobs for instance. Just like with female. Competition anxiety prevails.

[–]ac714 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Oh shit. I was worried thinking why you weren’t getting bombed with downvoted until I checked which sub I was in.

You handled yourself expertly and with confidence in a shitty situated. They respected that you stood up for yourself and folded their hand in a manner of speaking. You didn’t get a raise or promotion out of it but they learned at the 6 month mark to take you seriously.

[–]BPasFuck 38 points39 points  (3 children)

In my experience, the purpose of these meetings is to create a paper trail for possible dismissal.

I don't mean they're trying to fire you. I mean that they will try and have something on file about everybody-- something negative.

This way, if they decide later on that they don't like you-- or someone else-- they can point to this piece of paper and say "Joe Blow was notified that we don't like the way he files his TPS reports. Joe Blow was counseled on how to improve. We have detected no signs of improvement. We feel it is time for Joe Blow's dismissal."

The criticism will sometimes be valid. Sometimes, it's just nebulous bullshit. Either way-- you're a simp, if you think anything you say or do in this meeting will lead to you getting a raise.

[–]captaintrippay 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Big facts.

[–]vivid_mind 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I wish employment laws were simpler so people wouldn't have to get involved in such bs. You're right.

[–]_the_golden_rule_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Spot on. This is why it's recommended to change employers every few years to increase your pay.

[–]suprathepeg 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Maintain frame.

Relax. (Or at least try to appear relaxed)

Ask specific questions about any criticisms they have. Drill down if you can.

Treat raise offers as the first offer in a negotiation.


[–]WoodWizzy87 6 points7 points  (0 children)

The first 6 months of any job is not a job, but a “trial period” RJ see if you’re up to snuff. How many times were you late, hitting your goals?, play well with others? How’s the teamwork? Are you filing everything correctly? Is paperwork in order?

Until you have amazing financial stability or are the boss, you don’t do any Machiavellian bullshit to one up anybody. Keep your axe to the grindstone, ask how you can improve numbers, any certifications or classes you can take to be on top.

Your bosses boss or whoever called you to reassure you to relax is still working you over. He’s still trying to make it look like it’s a great place to work at. Even though he says not worry, take that with a grain of salt, everyone is replaceable. Learn as much as possible, think outside the box to fix things in other ways that others haven’t thought of.

[–]Endorsed Contributorleftajar 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is where you reap what you've sown the past six months.

If you've been doing great, you should be able to provide clear evidence of that. Excellence should be demonstrated and documented -- that's lesson one of how to succeed as an employee.

If you haven't been excellent, then you may face a reckoning. If they don't fire you, be relieved you didn't get punished for mediocrity, and resolve to be better.

[–]leave1onread 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would recommend reading or listing to ( Never Split The Difference. Seriously a great book, should probably be in the Red Pill library. Teaches how to negotiate and get what you want while allowing the other party to feel like they win. Teaches frame and holding it even when lives are in the balance.

Never Split The Difference - By Chris Voss

[–]noPTSDformePlease 5 points6 points  (0 children)

you should have been showing your value over the last few months. its too late now for a last minute effort.

[–]drakehfh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm on the same boat as you, been here for three months and I have 3 other months as a trial. I am very aggressive when it comes to the salary. I have a really good one but I think I can get more. At least I am getting offers. I will have a meeting next month with my manager and will ask for contract renegotiations. But I will have at least 2 other job offers up my sleeves.

Being clear, talking slow with a deep voice and eye contact usually is enough to establish your frame and this way your manager takes you seriously.

[–]masterpiece00 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Look for another workplace, there are plenty around. Do you like the thought of finding somewhere more harmonious?

[–]OracleofFl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You say you are doing a "decent job"...I wouldn't think that employees only doing a decent job have much leverage. Start doing a kick ass job and then come back to us.

[–]Big_Daddy_PDX -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

You sound like you Iack frame. That “old school” mentality is something you don’t understand - real world experience. If they say you haven’t done something well enough, then confirm where you need to do better and thank them for their time.

The worst thing in these reviews is when the employee is stupid enough to think they rate at 5-stars in every category. News flash! You don’t rate as a 5 in more than one category unless EVERYONE in Executive leadership already told you that you’re killing it.