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My gf was telling me about this behavior she noticed on Facebook.

She’s noticed some women will suddenly announce they’re getting married to some guy with zero indication they were dating prior to the announcement.

In some cases, the dating was going on for more than a year. After announcing the engagement, the floodgates open up and they’re posting selfies together, referring the guy in their updates but before that happened, it was like the guy never existed. Zero disclosure about him.

My read is these women either:

A) Want to save face in case things don’t work out.

B) Wanted the best of both worlds. Be in a relationship but present to the world they are single so they could branch swing / trade up and not been seen as a shameless sluts in their social circles.

Am I right or am I missing a third reason?


[–]SeasonedRP96 points97 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

"B," with the addition of the validation they get from men messaging them and liking and commenting on their posts as if they were single. Their day wouldn't be complete if they didn't get 150 likes and a bunch of flirtatious comments when they post that they are going to the grocery store or some other trivial subject.

[–]dan78990 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

well said. my ex could "never" understand why I didn't post my gorgeous photographs of her. .

[–]randarrow52 points53 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

D) Chicks dating multiple guys, not exactly branch swinging, more so that she can stay on the CC longer. Had a chick do this to me, all lovey dovey to me then was suddenly engaged to a guy I had never heard of. She just suddenly brought him to a party and gave me the cold shoulder. They were married something like two months later.

[–]Hjalmbere42 points43 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

You dodged a bullet.

[–]randarrow16 points17 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Oh yeah, she was a single mother of four and a nurse. Never seriously dated her, and she was definitely husband hunting and I was NOT looking for a wife. Was awkward at time and funny afterwards. Would get sick for a week every time I kissed her. So many levels of red flags it was incredible.

She was a good kisser though.

[–]cilantromakesmepuke35 points36 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

she was a single mother of four and a nurse.

You dodged a full clip of bullets, Neo.

[–]Robin2Fast2Furious9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You got sick for a week after you kissed her? Dude, go for an STD check or something... that doesn’t sound right.

[–]imtheoneimmortal0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

He dodged a psyco-financial death

[–]bikermonk5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You have to be nicknamed "Dodger"

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

You dodged suicide

[–]omega_dawg9341 points42 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

what i notice is the following:

  1. post a bunch of pics with the new guy and brag about all the places they've been.
  2. give unsolicited relationship advice to everyone, esp. the single friends.
  3. post up all their plans for vacations, etc.
  4. the break-up happens.
  5. post a bunch of memes about being a strong woman.
  6. remove 25% of the pics of the guy and the events.
  7. post more memes about being a strong woman... post a little anti-man stuff. a few more weeks pass.
  8. 50% of the pics of the guy, etc. get deleted.
  9. disappears for a few weeks... comes back claiming, "i was busy."
  10. the last 25% of the pics of the guy disappears... stops posting on FB for a few more weeks.

[–][deleted] 18 points19 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

11) Repeat.

[–]traveling_introvert 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy Link

You missed the part where they get back together...then break up again...then get back together...then break up again then...you get the idea.

[–]omega_dawg938 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

i just laugh at how they delete a few pix at a time... the show death method. lol.

[–]magx0138 points39 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

Classing settling/beta bux shit. If they were marrying their alpha dream guy they would have been flooding faceshit with pics and status updates from day 1.

[–]SkankHuntL8911 points12 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Truth. Pretty sure it was like this with one girl I used to know.

Dating me for a while and posted pictures of us infrequently. Then a day after I broke up with her (she went abroad a month before I ended it) she’s all over fb with her alpha dream boy.

She’s now in Aus fucking a guy she couldn’t possibly find attractive for a visa.

[–]iwviw5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Ambitious one she is

[–]ethbytes2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I read that with Yoda voice, Jedi mind trick?

[–]ovrload2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Is she Asian?

[–]SkankHuntL892 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

White girl

[–]BewareTheOldMan7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yep - the "lucky guy" she's engaged to is basically one of the losers she pulled from her Beta-Orbiter Stable AFTER she realized her lowered SMV and that Chad does NOT marry or openly date low SMV women. They're strictly for pump and dump ONLY!

Look for the eventual divorce. It's forthcoming...

[–]VojvodaSrpski0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

What if the alpha doesn't allow her to post pics of him?

[–]Xevalous0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

What...

[–]caneyfan36 points37 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

You win the Reddit anthropology award of the day. On point observation.

[–]sevenlast12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

His girlfriend wins. However, It’s good info in case there are guys here in that situation.

[–]JarHeadJoseph0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is basic shit?

[–][deleted] 31 points32 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You are right. Also C) keep envious friends from stealing the boyfriend just for the sake of it

[–]Maybelowsmv7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I think men do the same though,

Unless they've legitimately only have had one ex.

Also, it might be a thing they've decided as a couple. If he doesnt post pictures of her, why should she? And vice versa

A lot of men seem to be uninterested in social media

[–]OmniscientOCE2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah makes sense to me. FB is mostly for family these days, and I don't like broadcasting my life to the world, but for a major event such as but not limited to becoming married, it would make sense to make it public.

[–]neuemoney5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

People don't use Facebook much anymore. They announced the engagement on Facebook because it's big news - but people don't chronicle their lives on Facebook like they used to in 2008.

[–]MrAntiAntiBioticsGuy1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Exactly what I was thinking, but not quite. Some people including myself don’t post on social media that much unless it important. But when it comes to Snapchat it’s more likely than so, but still... people rarely use any.

[–]ethbytes2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

IMHO Both not either... Just percentages of each rolled into one.

[–]iCeeYouP4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Spot on observation

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I don't know about A. B is so regular it hurts.

[–]randomTATRP1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

C) They live in a small town where everyone know everything about everyone so they try to keep it down, I've had these situations, randomly get on FB, oh wow, these are in a relationship now! oh, look at this, this one's having a baby! lol

[–]dan78991 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

My GF of 5 years broke up with me after having a facebook messneger relationship with some dude.

Personally, I never posted pics of my
(beautiful) ex because I hated the torrent of orbiters commenting about how pretty she was on the pictures I took.

[–]dtyler860 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Reason #3: she doesn’t post out of spite if YOU don’t show her off enough. It’s a tit for tat game.

I dont like to post, care to post or even remember at all to post about things I do with my friends, family or girlfriend. My girlfriend refuses to post anything of us as long as I dont. I still dont, I hate that I’m being pressured to invest anymore time on social media than I care to. So there it is. I dont post, she refrains as sternly as she can. I post one thing and she floods her social with us. I then don’t post a few months later? She deletes everything

[–]1walawalawa0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I've known women who suddenly get married but don't post about it. I also know women who have boyfriends and don't tell anyone about it.

The third reason: It's hypergamy: they want as much possible attention or validation to avoid the possibility in their mind that they'll be stuck with some loser.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Once had a gf who wouldnt make it Facebook official, saying in the past she didnt like how when they became off and on to have to keep changing it. So basically she predicted she was planning on being off and on

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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