Lot's of things to learn around this place. Most of it posted around 2015 and the rest is just reiterations of the same advice. There were men who built this bridge for the rest of us. There was a particular individual who coined a phrase for every x years married you require y months of recovery.

Where am I?

Last month it has been three years since I unplugged. That's roughly 36 months and I was married for 15 years when I started. By anyone's calculation it should have taken me what, 45 months? Three months for every year of marriage.

You got guys like /u/[deleted], /u/sorcererking, /u/bluepillprofessor, /u/over60_stupid_loner, /u/strategos_autokrator, /u/sexyshoulderdevil, /u/spexer, and many others like /u/spexer. There are so many people like /u/firetempered, /u/steeltoeshitkicker, and /u/stonepimpletilists that were instrumental to me in my path that I can't even remember all of them. Too many beers and too many slept since then's.

Where did I begin?

Pretty much served divorce papers with no excuse when I returned home from a business trip. Let it roll, signed them, and went to move on with my life. Hit MRP pretty hard to save the marriage and never looked back. She lived in the same house and we were making plans with our lawyers to split up the estate. Pretty simple stuff.

Moving on to her needing a drink to have sex to pretending to have a drink to have sex. Again, this might be murky, its just been so long. I absolutely refused to deal with her unless sex was on the table. All while we were on our break and sorting things outs. A couple of months later she serves me papers cancelling the divorce. She wasn't asked, and to this day she has never been asked why. I know why.

My gym routine isn't near what it used to be. Take notes gentlemen. Don't slack off, the gym for life is the key. Not the gym till you become alpha.

How did I start?

First, I read the side bar unlike many retards who think they can google search their life problems. Then I started SL5x5 for a solid two years. I still to this day don't know which helped more. I lean to the lifting, but the reading was a nice supplement. Came here practically every day to read and post, just trying to pass on the knowledge and gain some edges I didnt knew exist. Spent the money on the SGM and put it to great effect.

Fast Forward, Where I am.

Today was maybe the first day I had the realization of turning the corner. Things had been adding up, the whirlwind, the rp concepts, and just putting myself first in everything. Realizing that if I was doing ok, that was the most important for those around me. Especially the Outcome Independence that I truly achieved. Learning from other women that I was the prize, something to be valued. Chasing women and buses only makes you tired and you will always be left behind. No longer did worry about what the wife thought, the girlfriend thought, the chick at the bar last weekend thought. It simply didn't matter, there would be plenty of others.

Yesterday I had an epiphany when the wife told me she likes when I ask to her help me. For years I looked at disdain on her not willing to just pitch in like I did. The sex has been amazing for a solid year now, on demand, whatever I want no questions asked. Shit tests, hell even comfort tests are practically non-existent. Don't get me wrong, they come and go without more than a passing thought. The fight over me controlling all of the finances is now just routine for me to handle all of the expenditures. She wanted sex this morning, she initiated, and she swallowed like she has done for over a year now. Can't tell you the last time I was inside her.

She actively comes to me for advice, leadership, and just expects that I am making all the decisions and choices. Even for dinner she just asks me where we are going. It's no longer the rigmarole of where we are going. It just doesnt happen. The huge knock down blow out fight over buying 2% instead of 1% milk isn't even on the table. Accidentally bought the 85% instead of the 90% hamburger is now just a we make do type of thing. Yeah, I literally even grocery shop and cook when I am home.

Turning the Corner

After years of controlling everything and even counseling my VP's against the very same concept. I have realized I can trust her now to delegate work to her. She wants to step up, she has earned her right to step, and through all of the denials and dismissals she is still stepping up. Quite a different woman than I married. The very one who gladly openly rebelled against me. Spoiled brat to devoted wife and family matriarch. Maybe the three months for every year is just a rule of thumb.

Much like my MRP journey, my journey of turning her into my first officer will be the same pace as before. Perhaps with a little more carrot than stick this time.

Hang in there, the light at the end of the tunnel isn't the train so just keep your foot on the gas and nevermind them brakes.