TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

34

TL;DR: I recently calculated my “cost per fuck” with my wife. It costs me between $250 - $500 each time I fuck my wife.

How did I get here you ask? I will summarize. I am 38, she is 37 and we have two kids 9 and 8. We have three homes, two of which we rent and I recently went in as a silent partner and purchased a semi-truck to move relocating Doctors around the US. Starting that biz, is what spawned this whole topic, and quite honestly the last few months of anger phase for me.

During my meetings with my lawyer to get the biz partnership setup we did a divorce analysis on my current situation. As it sits, I would 100% get divorce raped and there is little to nothing I can do about it. Texas is a 50/50 state, so my wife would walk away with between $300-450K in cash and prizes, 10 years of CS at $2000 a month and probably 5 years of alimony. Yikes.

So you take those numbers, add them up, divide by how many times on average per week I will fuck my wife over the next 10 years and you get your “cost to fuck” number.

Now, I know what you are going to say – red-sfpplus there is more to marriage than sex! You are right, there is kids, cooking, cleaning etc. But as my kids get older, the value my wife brings to child rearing goes down – quickly I might add. Sure, she cooks, cleans and manages the home, but you know who else does? Chefs, maids and dry cleaners.

Value – what is it and who brings it? Why does she get a cool $500K for being married to me? Did she get all the advanced IT certs I have and college education? Did she get her real estate license? Does she go out and sell projects and do shit to bring home the bacon? Those are value items I bring to the table, not her.

Do I hate my wife? No. I have grown to hate the institution of marriage and am vastly annoyed at myself for falling into the trap when I was 26 and ignorant.

So what do I do? I start to be smarter with money. I do not gift any money to my kids. That starts now. I do not have an estate setup, that starts now. I do not have a “gambling” habit that bleeds cash. That starts now. The kids are old enough and I have started to drop hints that she needs to go back to work. She is starting to look – slowly I might add.

I was 100% faithful to my wife until I was 28 or so. In fact, she was the only woman I slept with till then. Since, then I have been a cheating whore and there have only been a few periods of time where I have been faithful. It’s not that I don’t love her, I just love sex more. There are so many women out there who will fuck me for $0 and the sex is so much better, more exciting and the whole “no strings attached” thing is fantastic when your wife has one big string attached to you.

Does she know? Probably. She suspects I am sure. The last month I have not touched her, and she isn’t stupid. She knows I have to fuck 2-3 times a week, so she can put 2+2 together. She also enjoys the life I provide for her and my kids. We have a good family, I just really like to fuck other women.

Why did I make this post? It has been an interesting few months for me. Between the semi-truck thing, I also consolidated from 2 jobs down to 1 with a really great company, so my personal life gains have been immense. I can’t complain. My wife has received little to no attention from me during that time, because I have been so busy. Both my kids teams won their softball/baseball championships and we started all-stars.

Homework for you? Calculate your “cost to fuck.” Or don’t and save yourself the headache. Think about how much that pussy you put on a pedestal costs you, vs. how easy it can be to fuck one for free.

Extra points? Something I struggle with currently and why I am angry. Figure out a way to not let this type of information bother you. I am a logical, analytical, Type-A personality. Knowing this type of stuff just pisses me off, but there is nothing I can do about the past. Some people would call it extreme negative visualization. How do you look at someone in the eyes, know they will cost you $500K to walk away from because of modern laws and feminism and not get pissed at some level? Working on myself, my goals, lifting and all the other things we preach on here help, but they are not a full cure.

When you figure it out, let me know.

I will end with a twist on a phrase we see here all the time. I hate it, because it was coined by some scorned man, and it directly implies the woman is the prize which is not true. So I am coining a new one.

You are not hers, it is just her turn.


[–]FoxShitNasty83Grinding66 points67 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

Fuck.... I'm getting a div/0 error stupid excel.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

LMFAO

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Ayeeeeee

[–]InChargeManMRP APPROVED5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

My excel put the figure in red, so I guess it means she pays me $1,500 per fuck. TBH probably I'm worth more :)

[–]PersaeusMRP APPROVED1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Captain obvious here - your cost is actually infinite in terms of both $ and more importantly time. Let that sink in

[–]FoxShitNasty83Grinding0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Right now yes, but not forever.

[–]resolutions316!!CAUTION!! Runaway bus potentially ahead1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

MORE EXCEL JOKES

[–]Senor_Martillo132 points133 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

Easy solution bro. Fuck your wife more. Cost goes down.

Seriously though, there actually is supposed to be more to marriage than sex and finances. Do you not enjoy her company? Do you not share dreams and hobbies and adventures? Contrary to what a lot of people assume by scratching the surface of MRP, there is innate value in sharing your life with a loving spouse. The whole reason it’s called MARRIED redpill. If you really truly just see your wife as a maid or a nanny, and you don’t want to sustain a loving relationship with her, then you chose poorly.

Everyone makes their own bed and has to lie in it, but I’d rather walk from $500k than live the rest of my life with a spouse I didn’t want to be with. Money can be made again. Your life cannot.

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

amen

[–]UEMcGillMarried- MRP MODERATOR2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Rule zero is paramount. He made a perfectly rational decision in the framework of MRP.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red[S] -3 points-2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

I appreciate your comment, but do not read more into the post that what is written.

Those numbers are calculated at an average fuck of 2 times a week over the next ten years, and not adjusted for inflation.

I would say those are very reasonable numbers considering guys on here fuck 1-2 times a month at best.

[–]Rian_StoneHard Core Navy Red19 points20 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

</shotsfired!>

[–]SteelSharpensSteelMRP MODERATOR1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Quality 3-4 per week here. Did I mention that I love this place?

[–]bogeyd6MRP MODERATOR4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Where is /u/oldredpiller when you need him?

[–]SteelSharpensSteelMRP MODERATOR33 points34 points  (24 children) | Copy Link

Dude, you doing this is just gonna piss you off. Stop wasting your valuable time ruminating on shit like this and start focusing on stuff you CAN do.

You can get too stuck in your head. It's happened to me. Rage at the world all you want, but the only thing rage gives you is a temporary release.

It also sounds like you've been too busy for non-sex fun. Go take a motorcycle trip for a few days. Camp and kill your food. Conquer a mountain. Do something to get yourself out of this funk, because if you keep doing this, you're gonna have a bad time.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red[S] 7 points8 points  (23 children) | Copy Link

Oh man, I am disappointed in the first half of your response /u/SteelSharpensSteel

We advocate on here all the time to get a "divorce checkup" done every now and again. In fact there was a highly upvoted post on here not to long ago talking about it.

I went and did just that. Is the result of that not supposed to piss me off at some level? Maybe you are suggesting that it has pissed me off TO much, and I might be able to be convinced of that.

I love the second half of your post, and YES. I need a vacation. I have been very busy with work, kids and have had ZERO time to myself - other than the gym, which even that has dropped down from 5 days a week to 2.

I am in a funk. I am mentally drained and posting about it, writing it down and holding myself accountable to myself and you guys helps.

I appreciate the gentle kick in the balls.

[–]SteelSharpensSteelMRP MODERATOR10 points11 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Yeah, it's not that you're pissed off after the consult or doing a divorce checkup, it's more that you're letting this get to you for such a long time and that you're SO pissed off about it. By doing so, you give it power over you.

You're in that spot of high stress from work when really you need to manage your time better to have downtime scheduled.

Take a day, use some hotel points, and go to a hotel with beach/pool. Destress a bit. I'm at the ocean right now, as a matter of fact. You gotta plan for downtime.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red[S] 4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

You gotta plan for downtime.

My key takeaway and something I have not done in 6 months. Thanks for the reminder.

[–]johneyapocalypseTold Death to Fuck Off - MRP is easy mode2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Dude, remember, it doesn't need to be a big event, or require massive planning either.

Just say "fuck it" - maybe even today - and boogie to the airport - or hop in the car - and go somewhere for a night or two.

I've been doing that a lot lately and my sanity levels have evened-out beautifully.

[–]resolutions316!!CAUTION!! Runaway bus potentially ahead1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Hugely beneficial. My income goes up every time I do this.

[–]TaipanshimshonMRP APPROVED8 points9 points  (18 children) | Copy Link

What is it about your wife that makes you unable to either fuck her more or fuck her like she was some other chick?

I know you will probably say that if it wasn’t for the kids you’d be done with her. So quick question - do you like your wife ?

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red[S] 5 points6 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

This is an excellent question, and partially easy to answer.

The knee jerk answer is - YES. With no kids I would be living the song "Margaritaville" all year long. But that is a grass is greener answer.

The long answer is, that she used to add a TON of value to my life, but as my kids get older, and my skill set goes up, what does a 45 year old woman going thru menopause bring to the table? As her Captain, how should I be leading her today, so that when our kids are going to college, she still bring something to the table.

Perhaps I am going thru a phase where I am just over thinking things. I tend to do that from time to time.

The answer to your final question is this: Not as much as I liked her 5 years ago.

[–]TaipanshimshonMRP APPROVED6 points7 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

Your last statement - And why do you think that is?

I don’t know what a 45 woman offers. I don’t know what a 35 yo woman offers. I don’t know what a 25 year old woman offers. ... I’m not going lower you freaks.

What I know is what I offer and what I’m willing to have in my life that shares what I offer.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red[S] 5 points6 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

I already alluded to it in another response, but the answer is simple.

It is a weakness/struggle of mine of holding people to the same standards I hold myself.

It is something many Type-A personalities struggle with. I have been to probably 10 management training classes over the past decade to help me with this but it is still an issue.

Overtime, resentment builds up. I can push it down into the belly of the beast, but when a lawyer looks at you, says your wife gets 500K to walk away, any time she want to.

It pisses you off, and you go on reddit to post about it. You get some guys you respect to slap you around, adjust course and move the fuck forward.

And you fuck Shelly in the bathroom at Starbucks to tell yourself you still have abundance and options.

[–]TaipanshimshonMRP APPROVED7 points8 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

I feel ya man.

You lost your true options in your 20’s when you got married. By the same token you probably wouldn’t be worth this much if you were single. You simply wouldn’t need to be.

As for management classes. Lolz. They all come down to the same thing really. Leaders lead and if a leader doesn’t have the ability to simply fire someone at will - all the leadership in the world doesn’t matter.

Also - I’m gonna hit you up to move me. Lol

[–]wkndatbernardus2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Great point about his net worth not being as much if he weren't married. There are some intangibles to the marital contract that may get lost in a straight quantitative analysis. Even moving forward when her child rearing abilities become superfluous, I'd say having someone to work for/with can be a significant motivator.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red[S] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Also - I’m gonna hit you up to move me.

That is funny. How all this came about is from my Starbucks male group.

Chris is a recruiter friend of mine. He places high level doctors all over the US. Chris also helps them with their relocation efforts, etc.

He had the idea of buying a truck and trailer and doing the relocation services as an add on to his recruting efforts. But Chris does not have enough liquidity or credit to do this himself.

I did, so I helped financially. Now Chris is working for me (by extension) and I own 50% of a Volvo semi and trailer and once my investment is paid off get 10% of relocation fees moving forward.

Or I could loose out on 50K. Either way, life is a gamble.

[–]TaipanshimshonMRP APPROVED2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Best part ? I don’t pay for my relo.

So - move me. Charge cost plus whatever. Give me the rest. 🤣

[–]azwildcat741 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

As someone who's made a career of the transportation industry I hope at least one of you is versed in the intricacies of the industry, speaking for regulations and otherwise, or you might be in for a rough ride.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes, there is a third guy in the mix that has that background. It is a two man partnership in ownership and the guy that is going to do the actual work. One more guy to do the driving of loads or whatever they call it.

[–]AechzenMRP APPROVED1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

what does a 45 year old woman going thru menopause bring to the table?

Hopefully, at the very least, her own paycheck so if you're divorced your alimony is minimal.

I got my wife working after kids. It was a struggle. There were times I spent more on kid care than what she was bringing in. It was worth it, because she never would have gotten the job she has now without the first few shit jobs as she was going back to work after not working.

Also, your perspective will change. A 45 year-old woman sounds a lot hotter when you're a 60 year-old dude. For now, I (and probably you) can still bang substantially younger, substantially more fun women. Enjoy the ride.

[–]Rian_StoneHard Core Navy Red1 point2 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

Resentment is my guess. Either way, it will pass. either OP will find his new gambling/child gifting path of sliding into the grave with his last 10 bucks in his pocket will work, or he will get tired of it and come out a refined man.

Either way, he's owning it

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red[S] 3 points4 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

Resentment is my guess.

Yes. It is easy to forget that I am a man, and she is a woman.

Holding people to the same standards I set for myself has always been a weakness/struggle of mine.

[–]Rian_StoneHard Core Navy Red7 points8 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

I find the blooper argument funny. Often RP men are accused of treating women like children, like warm holes, or subhumans with softer skin and lavender hair. they so desperately want guys to man up and treat them like equals.

And you've kind of figured out where that leads you. If you judge the merits of a woman by the standards you judge a man, she's going to fall short, most will. Most guys can't even make it.

So the more you treat her like a man, the more she lets you down. Personally, I've come to embrace female nature. Human as anyone, along with the failings. They will not be strong, assertive, compassionate, loyal or a good plow horse. At least not in the aggregate.

Really allowed me to enjoy them more, even the thots. Pretty sure last night I was given the ultmateCAD green light on this married chick in San Fran.
'see how cold I am, touch my leg'
'my husband and I sleep in separate rooms'
'you can take my place at the conference, we can go get my badge, it's in my car around the corner'
'Ive never been the monogamous type'
'how long are you in town, you two should come over and use the pool'

add to that the occasional kino, the constant berating of hubby, and his thirst for validation (see, I'm right, and am the good guy here) and you could easily see her as some evil vagina bitch. Even my wife said 'you probably could have'. I was just psyched I finally get to try the japaneese fried chicken on someone elses expense account (worth it).

For what it's worth, and I have no idea if this is going to be of value to you, but just stop thinking of the world as a place that has to be efficient, consistent, honest, loyal, hardworking, or efficient. It's people desperate to get out of hardship, then desperate to fuck up all that work. And now, more than ever, people aren't even coming from hardship, so they have a brazen confidence about the fucking up part. It'll kill a bit of that will to win you have, but it gives you a wonderful seat next to one of the most riveting performance art pieces out there, and I am glad I have front row seats.

Besides, you'll at least be able to start fucking your wife again in between thots, at least until the Punisher gets another season on netflix, and it beats a gambling addition. my dad had one of those, and it's not the best use of your time IMHO

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red[S] 2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

gambling addition

That is more of a: Take "cash" out of your account and hide type of an addiction than actually gambling. Cash is hard to find.

Good stuff in your post as well man. Bottom line, is I am wound up right now. Was super stressed about getting this new job, and now that it is done and moving forward I will chill out some.

[–]Rian_StoneHard Core Navy Red2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I feel you man. I start mine Monday. Decided to grab a 250$ bottle of cbd oil and start adding a drop to the morning coffee. If you live in CA/CO/WA it may be worth looking into.

[–]AechzenMRP APPROVED0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

DC too.

[–]SteelSharpensSteelMRP MODERATOR1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Speech material here.

[–]TaipanshimshonMRP APPROVED1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Of course she is a woman. If she was a man you would never want to fuck her

[–]SorcererKingMRP SAGE - MRP MODERATOR25 points26 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Meanwhile, /u/red-sfpplus wife is sitting in a dark room...

"Hmmm. Carry the one... there. Wait. You mean I gotta fuck this asshole guy like 200 times a year just to earn a meager $50k salary? And do all this child rearing and listening to him carry on about that stupid semi-truck? Life sucks."

End scene.

[–]bob13bob11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Great post but too much bias on your part.

You saved a lot of money on taxes filing jointly. U need to factor In cost of trustworthy childcare and cleaning and cooking. Honestly 500k after 10 years ain't bad for a decent earner like yourself. The money you pay for child care is actually money u are already spending. Around here i would have to pay 50k a year for 40 hr a week quality care and I'd still never trust them anywhere close to their bio mom. Also it's not tac deductible so that's 75k in before tax income.

I doubt you were holding up your share of the household which allowed you to spend time investing in certs working. You got to increase you skills in a market value while childcare is not a skill you can sell. Her earning power is gimped.

You are just whining at your choice to have kids and wanting out of partnership that benefitted you previous. Hey, buyouts are expensive and you will still reap the benefit of a caring mother for your offspring for life. You are breaking the contract but blaming wife wife wife. Your kids didn't chose to enter the partnership like you.

Get a control on your narcism, it's important to have but too much will make you an inferior at running a business.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Love your posts. The eye opening part of this one is, even if a guy were to have a supply of sex with random women whenever he wants...that does not erase the anger of the one that has your balls on the chopping block.

I try and think of it like this...there are things in life you just can't control. Think of all the people you walk around every day. Think of the ones standing behind you in the elevator. At any moment, one could pull a gun unknown to you and blow your head off.

But they dont. BUT THEY COULD. You cannot control them. Hurting them for having that ability does nothing...in fact it may make them more likely to do it. Getting mad at them does nothing either. Imagining a way to go live in a log cabin by yourself is educational so I have nothing against it. And certainly being more nice to them so that they dont does nothing. In fact theyll take advantage of you for that.

The bottom line is, you just gotta live your life anyway. "My wife can divorce rape me. Yep, the threats there. It sux. Move on."

[–]Rian_StoneHard Core Navy Red5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Technically, isn't that HER cost to fuck number?

Love the post, the 'me first' attitude is sorely lacking in here, or anywhere for that matter. You're enjoying the decline more than I am, so I'm taking this as a bit of a kick in the ass.

If you get a chance, Terrence Popp did one of these calculations as well, though I can't find the video at the moment. Worth a watch, he's fairly entertaining about it

[–]Neutral_User_NameActually Does Work10 points11 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

As it sits, I would 100% get divorce raped and there is little to nothing I can do about it. Texas is a 50/50 state, so my wife would walk away with between $300-450K in cash and prizes, 10 years of CS at $2000 a month and probably 5 years of alimony. Yikes.

We are in the exact same boat, brother. Trying to explain that to the do-gooders who simply say "Just get divorced, bro, start a new life!" is next to impossible.

I got you though.

[–]Red-Curious2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Better now than 10 years from now. Staying longer only makes financial sense in a marriage if you're staying forever or if you're the one divorce raping her.

[–]88Will88 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

One of the reasons I am more of a red pill guy than an MRP guy is because my experience was very different to most. I never got divorce raped, my ex wife was still fucking me in public toilets the month before we broke up and she bought more money into the marriage than I did. I never went through dead bedroom, I skipped the divorce rape, kept the house, the kids and the businesses. There was 2 years of anger and arguments with her but now everything is perfect. In fact she gave me a huge sum of money recently due to her guilt over the family breakdown. So the cost per fuck during the marriage? I think I got paid about $25-50 for each time. We fucked a lot and I made out of the break up like a bandit.

After the breakdown of the family though I fell into some beta habits. For a few months there all of my sex was paid for and I paid for expensive dates with women who did not even kiss me. My cost per lay for the first few months was around $400. Then I learnt game, got very good at it. Towards the end I was going over to their place, getting them to cook me dinner, drinking their wine, fuck her in her own bed, shower in her shower and go home. So the price per fuck went from a negative into me receiving a home cooked meal, a bottle of wine, and a free nights accomodation.

[–]AechzenMRP APPROVED0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

fuck her in her own bed, shower in her shower and go home

I'm there. It's a nice place to be.

[–]weakandsensitive4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The problem with raw data is that it often lacks context.

[–]Reach180MRP APPROVED8 points9 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Guess I have no room to ever complain. My wife pays to fuck me.

[–]SteelSharpensSteelMRP MODERATOR5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Technically mine does too. Guess I'm a manwhore.

[–]rammutroll2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Teach me, sensei!

[–]BlackFire684 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Do NOT do this unless you are wiling to act on the outcome of the math. I could pay a VERY qualified professional for the primary service my wife should be providing me.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You are not hers, it is just her turn.

Then you're like a slot machine. Jackpots for her.

Seriously, every time you try to monetize a relationship, it turns into pimping and whoring. Hard work for both of them.

Still comes down to value though. Most hoes don't do laundry, cleaning, or raise your kids. Your problem is fairly valuing her contribution vs yours. Keeping a balance sheet probably won't make you happier; as you just mentioned. But not knowing is worse.

[–]annalucrezia4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Your relationship sounds depressing as hell

[–]Grimsterr2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Good god never, ever calculate this, it's basically just masochism to do so. Hell I watched my dad do it once, as a joke, and he was a poor construction worker barely making a living and his CPF was over $100 and that was 30 years ago.

[–]atticusfinch19732 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

A guy on nomarriage.com years ago calculated marriage and two kids for 20 years versus banging an escort twice a week ($400 weekly - this was 15 years ago) for the same amount of time.

The hooker was cheaper and you were guaranteed top shelf sex twice a week. It was a big eye opener.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

>marriage and two kids vs banging an escort

You honestly think a hooker can give you the life fulfillment that seeing your progeny grow up can give you? When you're on your deathbed, you won't be thinking about that awesome nut you busted years ago.

[–]redpillcad2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Value – what is it and who brings it?

It may depend case by case but if women are interchangeable sex and cleaning dolls im pretty sure only one womnan has access to your kids. Maybe you want to live with them and not have a parade of losers in your house when you aren't there?

[–]MrChad_ThundercockPlaying the lead roll1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

“whole “no strings attached” thing is fantastic when your wife has one big string attached to you”

Daddy likes this.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

How much did Dr Dre lose when he walked away from Death Row Records?

[–]PersaeusMRP APPROVED2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

A lot less than he made afterwards

[–]whackPanther1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

From your story it sounds like he wasn't a family lawyer. Texas is a community property state and those almost never give out alimony payments. You'd only have child support.

$2000 a month for two kids BTW? What's your monthly income look like if you're willing to share because JEEZ.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

It doesnt matter. I would get maxed out in CS.

Alimony is a thing in Texas.

[–]whackPanther1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Would you have any take home left for yourself or do you think it'd just be a countdown timer before you went to jail for arrears? How bad of a situation is it?

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red[S] -1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Its pretty clear you are new around here my man. Go read my post history and the post again. If you think I couldnt afford 2K a month, how can I own 3 homes and a semi truck?

Appreciate the comments.

[–]whackPanther0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Oh I see. You're right. I congratulate you on your success then it sounds earned and you should be proud.

I'm in a similar spot, don't hate my wife but goddamn has marriage as an institute driven me nuts. I feel for you. Best we can do is just keep it out of our minds and encourage the wives to seek employment.

[–]Captain_pants41 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is funny. I agree though; it’s hard to not see things in this light when you feel your wife doesn’t bring much to the table.

I got divorced a few months ago and the woman I’m seeing now fucks like a pornstar, pays for half of everything we do, cooks and cleans for me, then goes home when I have my kids

I also pay a hefty amount in childcare costs and CS but it’s worth it.

500k is quite a lot, but how much would it be 2, 4, 6 years from now?

[–]Red-Curious1 point2 points  (15 children) | Copy Link

Since nobody else wants to and I have no good excuse not to, I ran the calculation using all my fancy divorce software. Result: -$192. That's right: she pays me.

Wait ... so does that mean I should have less sex with my wife so my per sex value improves even more? That's why math doesn't always make sense.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red[S] 0 points1 point  (14 children) | Copy Link

I am glad you posted up.

First - How can you have a cost to fuck of less than 0? Does your wife make more money than you, thus in a split she is somehow paying you? Apparently I need to learn more in this area if that is the case, or maybe because of your profession you are better at mitigating risks and hiding assets?

Second - I agree 100% the math doesnt always make sense. Still, there is value here I think.

[–]SteelSharpensSteelMRP MODERATOR0 points1 point  (13 children) | Copy Link

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red[S] 0 points1 point  (12 children) | Copy Link

Yes, I have read that before. I still dont see how he gets a negative cost to fuck, but it doesnt matter.

His wife works, mine does not (currently). Its all math. My single income is 2x their dual so I am at a higher risk.

We also have over 500K in equity in just our 3 homes, not including retirement accounts, etc.

Its not really the money that I care about, even though it might appear that way.

This is all hypothetical anyway. Provided I do not get divorced, my cost to lay is probably 0 or a negative number I suppose.

[–]SteelSharpensSteelMRP MODERATOR0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy Link

My guess is the retirement account, and if not, then I'm curious how he got negative as well.

While I make solid money, I would have to start my own business to make what my wife makes. So negative cost for me, hence the manwhore.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

hence the manwhore.

Well, that is one thing we have in common :)

[–]Red-Curious1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes, it's the retirement account that does it.

[–]wekacuck0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Doesn't he already have half the retirement account? The only way he gains anything by splitting the account is if he's expecting nothing from her retirement account unless they divorce. It just seems like a parlor trick.

Instead of them both putting say $50 into their own retirement accounts, she puts $100 and he puts $0 and he does something else with $50 that she doesn't spend $50 on (that ends up being split the other direction). At the end of the day they'd both get $50 when the retirement accounts are split.

[–]Red-Curious0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

The same thing is true of a guy who owns a business. Whether it's a business, an IRA, a 401k, or whatever ... investments all work the same. The difference comes in whose income is invested and whose is flexible and who has access to spend the flexible income at their own discretion.

[–]Rian_StoneHard Core Navy Red0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy Link

If you get a chance, reach out to ultmateCAD, he was in your prediciment a few years back

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red[S] 0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy Link

I thought he was legend and moved on?

[–]Rian_StoneHard Core Navy Red1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

He switches usernames every few months... OPSEC. You'll reckognize your story in his comments if you keep an eye out in flaired TRP users

you should really have all the flaired guys on a friends list anyways, makes this reddit thing palatable

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

you should really have all the flaired guys on a friends list anyways, makes this reddit thing palatable

Yeah, I don't do anything that fancy. I come here, post a little, read a little, bust some balls. There is only 5 reddits I really look at, and dont spend any time on the main TRP sub - to many incel kids on there who really do hate women.

I'll look into the friends list.

[–]Rian_StoneHard Core Navy Red0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

give it a try sometimes, you'll wonder why you never did it before.

Just add every flaired person you can find onto your friends list. When you come to reddit, just view the friends queue, mostly the comments. remove guys who aren't saying things of value. in about 2 days, your going to have nothing but value everytime you come in, and not wade through a ton of bullshit.

then if you are in the mood to see bullshit, just view askmrp for a bit and watch guys use you to validate their egos

[–]SteelSharpensSteelMRP MODERATOR0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

AskMRP - "Faggot!" "Thank you sir, may I please have another?"

[–]jcrpta1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

You mentioned getting angry.

I don't know if it helps, but I worked out long ago what - at a very basic level - causes me to get angry. It was quite interesting to learn that about myself:

  • There's no point in getting angry about things I can do something about. Makes more sense to dedicate my energy to doing something about them.
  • Neither is there any point in getting angry about things I can do nothing about. What will it achieve?

What does that leave us? Not an awful lot, as it happens. Usually, the things it leaves are things that I somehow think I should be doing something about - but I'm buggered if I know what. And the solution to these things is to look for a way to either do something about it or prove to yourself that nothing can be done.

That's not to say it's easy. If you've spent 15, 20, 30 years getting wound up when you don't get your own way, you're not going to train yourself out of that habit overnight.

[–]wekacuck1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Extra points? Something I struggle with currently and why I am angry. Figure out a way to not let this type of information bother you. I am a logical, analytical, Type-A personality.

You could refine your analysis using estimates from something like the USDA cost of raising a child calculator to compute expenses and compare for married vs unmarried. Ways you could use that include running the numbers on various scenarios such as:

  • wife disappears in a poof of smoke
  • didn't get married in the first place
  • divorce-rape free utopia

I don't know your family structure but for example according to that calculator expenses for my family would be $29,078/year as two parent household and $38,644/year as single parent household. So economies of scale save me $9,566/year. Over ten years that comes to a savings of about $100k.* I estimate net gain of something like $60 per wifefuck.

*Edit: actually I would probably have to recompute annual expenses for each year based on updating kids ages into the estimates. I'm going to pretend I'm not doing that right now.

[–]BluepillProfessorMarried-MRP MODERATOR1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Those are some jagged Red Pills right there. You guys have a problem with our subs stance that you shouldn't get married. Red Pill is fine to stay married, but once you take enough of those pills advising people to get married feels like leading a head of cattle to the slaughterhouse.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yea you do sound angry. Common in here though.

[–]TurdDoctorHard Core Red1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Dude, you do you, but I wonder if on some level you are comparing your experience with your wife to your new business venture. In business, you take a risk and put some cash/time/labor into something and expect it to grow. You're pissed if you don't get more out of the venture than you put into it, and really pissed if you get no value from it at all. Either way, you own the outcome and move on to bigger/better things.

Maybe you have anger because you see Mrs. Red-sfpplus as an investment that has lost value over time and that's tough for a high value man to accept. You got better over the years but she hasn't. You have high expectation that she hasn't met.

Either lead her to become what you want, or leave, or not, and own the consequences whatever you do. 500K is a badge of honor reflecting how much you have achieved over the years. Yeah it sucks, but it also indicates what a high value man you are. Just own it and do whatever the fuck you want.

[–]ReddJiveMRP APPROVED1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You've got this a little off. IN this way you are in her frame considering her. Not her value to your marriage but assuming she HAS value and you are determining it. So let's get real and really compare it to business.

Men are in a constant state of earning profit. We want to end our fiscal year in the black. Some of us have multiple gigs/businesses going. Of course these prices will vary based on market value but go with it...

  • Sex maybe earns $10.
  • Certain sexual acts ups the margin. Varies between the man.
  • Supporting your mission in life maybe $20.
  • being supportive $35 per action
  • Doing laundry, cooking, let's say $30 for each time it is done
  • Nag? Complain, be negative all the time then the account losses money to the bank. At three times the rate it went in. (NOTE there is a difference in her coming to you for support and just plain being negative)

At the end of the quarter, fiscal year the man will take an account. If the account is in the black when he makes this assessment he will make a return on that investment. if not...then he looks for other profit centers. Why would a man continue his investment in a profit center that is losing money or a low earner?

If he is putting in the time to fix it, to get it to earn again but the maybe the business has run its course. Maybe it was never really a viable idea to begin with. Maybe he is just a bad business man. As time goes on you will look at that account and wonder why you only accept having $17 for your time and commitment, when you know someone is willing to make a bigger investment. But the man can only do this once he knows his business acumen is solid and proven.

The phrase she isn't yours goes more then just putting her in a place....higher or lower, it's also meant to convey that she has agency. She can and will make decisions. In the amoral/objective view she can decide against your Red Pill leanings.

Far too often we get into this trap. We say things like

She will fuck an alpha just not you

She is hitting on him because she's laughing and having a good time in a conversation.

Not true. Women aren't in a constant state of arousal just waiting to get off. If this were true every Alpha on the sub would be one tired mother fucker. It's also fact that not all women cheat. They have to be driven to that. The reasons we know, but they have to be pushed that direction or shown there is no other way out. We see this in guys that game women and are turned down. It happens. It's not just lack of attraction.

Besides the point is you. How you handle yourself and how you pursue your mission in life. Everything else must give way, and she becomes a low earning profit center in your business in life you remove her for another one.

When it comes to relationships, for men it's really more about a ham and egg breakfast. The chicken was involved. The pig was committed.

This is get the blue pill cat calls, but see beyond to the real deeper meaning. There is no ham and egg breakfast if the pig doesn't commit and doesn't get involved. You have to be there for a relationship to even occur. You don't need to invest too much. She does.

[–]470_2_700_nm0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I think a women who fails to realize her full potential in this day and age pay wise is a very large shit test many men see these days. I’ve whitnesed it with freinds.

Thanks for the FR and comments.

[–]ultrasuperthrowaway0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I get $208 per sex. Woohoo

She makes $30k more than me per year and we have sex about 12 times per month so check my math

[–]junk4jake0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Liquidate a chunk of your assets to the tune of $100k and tell her it is to invest in bitcoin next time it jumps up. Then when it drops 40% of the value tell her you are cashing in and getting out and put "remaining" $60k back in. Do that a couple times with a couple other bad investments and build a buffer she can't touch or see? Like buy some gold or silver you that the banks can't see.

[–]leon_leonidas0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Is there no way to structure all your businesses under legal entities (LLCs as property management companies, perhaps one more structure above that where you own the shares and make her a minority shareholder.. - I'm German and living in vietnam so not too familiar with how it works in the States.

  • the point I'm trying to make is: Could that whole 50/50 share all your assets thing been prevented if you had set up the legal ownership differently right from the start before you got married

-> and what is the closest you could get to that now?

[–]BlackFire680 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Can verify. Cost me over 600k

[–]wn360 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Just cost me 770k

[–]ILoveJuices0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Of course we are the prize. We BRING EVERYTHING to the table and they take everything when they leave.

[–]screechhaterMRP APPROVED0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

She’s definitely paying me

It’s your own fucking fault if she is not adding value, does not work and is not fucking you.

Start the repairs with lifting. Then sprinkle with diet, game, frame and OYS

[–]pacjax0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

man fuck money live the happiest life you can possibly live

[–]Lest4r0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Think of it like this. You are saving $250-$500 every time you make love with your wife. The 500k is what you already owe for the fuckings that you've done. You signed up for a ponzi scheme and you should start cashing in on it before it crashes. Somehow you're going to have to learn how to love your wife or you're gonna suffer hard.

[–]rammutroll 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

Stick to your wife and kids. Try to make them happy and if you want to sleep with other girls...I mean you shouldn’t but some guys are sex freaks so whatever floats your boat. But at the end, you are the one doing wrong. Just because you have money and feel you are an alpha male, doesn’t mean you have the right to fuck girls left and right. If you do, do it discreetly and don’t tell anyone about it.

Try to see marriage counselling if you think your relationship has some problems. You don’t want to get divorced or go through that. I’ve been there done that, it sucks. You will try to convince yourself it’s the best thing that ever happened to you (in some cases it is a blessing) but generally speaking, couples are not better left off once they divorce. Especially for women. Don’t you care about the poor girl? What would happen to her if she’s left alone because you like to sleep with other girls and love that lifestyle? Imagine what your kids will think when they get older.

That’s me being the devils advocate, or the angels advocate if you want. So my advice is to fix your relationship rather than look at other girls because these other girls don’t care about you and just want to sleep with you or whatever. Your wife brought you kids! If that’s not good enough for you then why are you even married to this girl? Sex is not everything there is to life. Focus on your family and live a happy life with them. Try to make them happy rather than act selfish. This is all bad karma that will come bite you in the ass one day.

Sorry for being too blunt with my post but I’m expressing how I feel.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Do you know what reddit this is? This is a reddit for men that have taken the redpill.

[–]thunderbeyond-1 points0 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

I have to say first and foremost your flipping of the "not yours, just your turn" is awesome.

Did she get all the advanced IT certs I have and college education? Did she get her real estate license? Does she go out and sell projects and do shit to bring home the bacon? Those are value items I bring to the table, not her.

The tricky part here is how you got ahead. My example is - I was spending every night hunched over a desk studying to get ahead while my wife cooked, cleaned and tended to the kids. I couldn't have got where I got to without that support. It was a decision we agreed on. Now the family enjoys the fruits of our labors.

Having said all that.... I agree that fantastic sex is quite easy to find. Even (especially?) as a married man. I am getting phenomenal sex - not from my wife but from plates. It is definitely $0 per fuck. And its better than what you get at home. Always.

So you ask..

How do you look at someone in the eyes, know they will cost you $500K to walk away from because of modern laws and feminism and not get pissed at some level?

I think you already started answering that question. Extreme negative visualisation. The only other thing you can do is make sure you never get divorced but none of us here know that's a given. Negative visualisation should cover those terrible things in your life. Divorce? Sure. But I think further - "what would I do if I lost my legs?' "what would I do if someone I loved [etc etc]". Its a mental preparation. We all hope bad things won't happen. But if they do, and we have a plan, we can ride the bad times. Fuck it, prepare for the worst.

Working on myself, my goals, lifting and all the other things we preach on here help, but they are not a full cure.

There is no cure to life, brother.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red[S] -1 points0 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

I agree with everything you have here. And I am glad you noticed my flippining.

To answer your question, my fear is not the past, it is the future. And I did not articulate that well in my OP.

My wife is a fucking awesome person for supporting me and the kids and helping me to get to where we are now. No problem.

The problem is, I am struggling to figure out her role over the next 5-10 years as the kids age out of the house, and my skill set continues to grow.

I do not need a baby sitter anymore. My kids are 9 and 8. They are at school 8 hours a day. No diapers, they feed themselves.

She is feeling it as well. She is bored, she fidgets around the house. Beyond the prospect of divorce rape, she needs to go back to work to keep her mind busy, and I am working on encouraging that.

I do not resent my wife today. But in 5 years I could see it big time when my kids are teens, unless I figure out a way to leverage her as the kids get older.

[–]annalucrezia2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Dude just divorce her. If you see her only in terms of what practical function she provides (i.e babysitter, maid) then your marriage is already worthless. Give her the chance to find someone who will get joy from being around her as a person.

[–]OffShore4Life1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Agreed this guy wants a div and now trying to rationalize it. Strike a deal w her, give her 65% and go fuck yourself... sounds like you're in crisis and need to buy something to try to make yourself happy with the shitty consumeristic life your living. Take a vacation with your family, duck your wife more and quit bitchin you rich prick!

[–]azwildcat741 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

My wife is a fucking awesome person for supporting me and the kids and helping me to get to where we are now. No problem.

This is the part you should continue to focus on, very positive.

The problem is, I am struggling to figure out her role over the next 5-10 years as the kids age out of the house, and my skill set continues to grow.

She's having the same struggles, as you note. You're doing your job in captaining the ship in the direction it needs to go, it is a process though. None of anything that any of us has done has been a 'quick' process per se, won't likely be for her either.

Any way to get her involved in the management of one of your capital ventures?

[–]thunderbeyond0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

How likely is it that she will find work that keeps her happy/occupied?

Is this something she wants?

BTW my cost to fuck? Yeah I would rather not think about it...

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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