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Rant/VentingI want to reject the red pill. (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by [deleted]x2

After years of lurking here, after all the lessons I've learned, I want it all gone.

Most of what is said here is true.

My LTR shows me the most affection when I hold frame. The times where I lost frame, when I showed my insecurities, were the times where she suddenly didn't want to be with me.

Dread game works wonders. I have more control over my current relationship than I know what to do with.

My girl is basically a subservient, though this is partly due to her nature (perhaps most asian girls are like this). She cooks, she cleans, we fuck when I want to fuck, we go out when I want to go out, if I ever put my foot down, that's the end of it.

But this isn't what I wanted. I'm a beta at heart.

When I was young, people would talk about soul mates as if it were a real thing, and I, in turn, believed it. I would fantasize about how I was going to meet her. What she was like. How nice it would be to have someone who's perfect for you in every way. Basically a disney fantasy on steroids.

It's still what I want.

I don't put pussy on a pedestal, I put the concept of a unicorn on a pedestal.

I want a woman who will love me for me, who will keep loving me if were to lose everything, if I stopped making her feel secure, if I stopped giving her the tinglies, if I lost frame.

Sometimes I want to chase the unicorn. To prove you all wrong. To show you it exists.

Sometimes I wish I never swallowed the red pill.

I want blissful ignorance. I want my fantasy back.


[–][deleted] 309 points310 points  (76 children)

Here's a nice quote for you from the rational male. I read it often.

"We want to relax. We want to be open and honest. We want to have a safe haven in which struggle has no place, where we gain strength and rest instead of having it pulled from us. We want to stop being on guard all the time, and have a chance to simply be with someone who can understand our basic humanity without begrudging it. To stop fighting, to stop playing the game, just for a while.

We want to, so badly.

If we do, we soon are no longer able to."

[–]TRP Vanguard: "Dark Triad Expert"IllimitableMan 87 points88 points  (4 children)

In the words of patrice: "you never ever get to just love a bitch"

[–]JovianTrainWreck 20 points21 points  (1 child)

I still miss that bastard...

[–]favourthebold 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yeah man. I found about him after he died. Too young.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fuck, now this should be the motto of TRP. So concisely put; I love it.

[–]1CaptainFalconer 174 points175 points  (49 children)

And this is why it's so important to have good friends. Bros.

Guys who allow you to relax, show vulnerability, and weakness. To put down the persona, and just be yourself.

Or shell out a ton of money on therapists.

[–][deleted] 48 points49 points  (5 children)

Where are these friends? All the men I know are all betafied and I can't let my guard down around them any more than I can around women. Sometimes the men are worse.

Sure I can come here and get the support of my RP bros. But what are we 68,000 out of how many millions in the English speaking world? Even then, it's just text on a screen. Poor substitute for human interaction.

[–]Aaron565 4 points5 points  (0 children)

get a group of good guy friends thats beyond one thing in common. If you are only friends with them because they are in your class, thats not good enough.

[–][deleted] 29 points30 points  (29 children)

This is the best way to go. It's great to fantasize about having a wife/gf who you can let in, and who will be your best friend. Hell, I was in the same position as you. Sadly, you can't have it all in one place. Women will use you when you show any vulnerability, and will rarely tell you the truth or give constructive criticism.

Build up a network of rational, well-balanced alphas. They are the only people you can truly trust.

[–]Imapancakenom 27 points28 points  (28 children)

Some women may "use you" when you show vulnerability, yes, but not all. I think it's more accurate to say that women lose respect for you and lose their attraction to you when you show vulnerability.

[–]CruiseCruise 43 points43 points [recovered]

Yeah, and I'd add:

They temporarily lose some attraction and idealize you a little less. But if you're not pathetic about it, then it's not permanent and you dont have to get stuck there. You just go do something masculine and you're back on track. Shove her against the wall and bite her neck. Flirt with a waitress. I do goofy shit like tell her how big my muscles are and how strong i am -- it's playful and it works just fine. And we're back in business.

Vulnerability isn't the end of the relationship. Being pathetic is, and there's a big difference between the two.

[–]elbirth 17 points18 points  (8 children)

I think you nailed a key aspect for those of us that get disheartened by all of this. Vulnerability versus being pathetic. It can be a very fine line, but you can show vulnerability without being a complete wimp about it.

[–]CruiseCruise 15 points15 points [recovered]

You might like this: One time, i welled up a little reading an inscription my GF's mom wrote to her in a book. The inscription was very very touching.

I kind of gave it a little time, then said something stupid about how it sucks having biceps that are so huge i cant even bend my arm enough to wipe my eye when i'm allergic to stuff.

My arms arent that big, and it's obvious i wasn't alergic to anything. It was dumb caveman OBVIOUS bullshit. Which was PERFECT. It felt big and strong and guy-ish, and gruff, and she liked that i gave a tiny little shit about her relationship with her mom.

Later I forced her up against a wall and kissed her because i know she loves that shit, and we went out to dinner.

She gets to feel like she's got this really physical gruff man who also has a nice side, but doesn't get carried away with it and can turn the nice shit off with no hesitation. It's all true, AND it's kind of an act to make sure she feels and remembers it's true.

[–]Endorsed ContributorRedBigMan 7 points8 points  (0 children)

We should probably apply Law of Power 46: Never appear too perfect.

A little vulnerability makes you human and approachable but just a little.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (7 children)

There are women who will mistake ANY vulnerability for being weak. In Atlanta, women tend to make final judgments pretty quick--quicker than I've seen in Los Angeles, Boston, New York, New Orleans, DEFINITELY Wisconsin and anywhere else I've lived. I've seen a fellow here talk about something--totally not being a pussy about it, just being frank about their feelings on a situation and you see women tune right the fuck out. Their fantasy is so easily broken. At least in this city (which has fairly recently been labeled as the gold-digger capital by a local news station a few months back) you can't let down the persona for a millisecond. Women in this town REALLY are after that chump who's gonna save them; any example of vulnerability or truth is met with immediate disappointment that you're not gonna provide them with frivolous STUFF. Its brutal, I feel really bad for the dudes that actually are looking to date the ladies out this way. ]

[–]dhump 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Atlanta area here, can confirm.

This place has quite a crop. I don't know if it's the "southern belle" thing, or what. That said, more than once I've played the "well, time for me to get out of here, come with if you want". Only to glance back once I've reached the door to see her scambling behind me.

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (6 children)

Exert a lot of effort to alter your personality to more closely match your goal. So you enjoy yourself and aren't just acting. Every now and again you can let your guard down a little. Pressing your face against a woman's back at night is nice. But, yeah, nothing replaces other guys.

[–]DingoManDingo 84 points85 points  (2 children)

When I press my face up against my homie's back, I truly feel safe.

[–][deleted] 24 points24 points

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[–]StarkAtheist 12 points13 points  (0 children)

AGREED.

I started hosting a party every Thursday night with just the alpha guys from work. I call it "Boys Night" and all the women at work HATE me b/c I will NOT allow them entry. lol

We play darts, cards, video games, drink beer, do shots, etc.

More importantly, we encourage each other in maintaining frame, listen to each other's challenges, and it helps us get through all the drama/high-maintenance from the women the rest of the week.

We knew we wanted to hang out.

We just didn't know we needed to...

We're on Week 18 and it's gone from just fun, to an Institution.

Bro's before ho's. Every time.

And Strength in Numbers, gentlemen.

[–]Josh_The_Boss 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Or older male mentors. I recently quit doing kitchen renovation work to go back to school, and while I don't regret this decision, it made me realize something. I didn't realize how valuable this older coworker was to my well-being until I suddenly didn't have someone to get good, masculine advice from. How important having a man to look up to and model myself after is, and a man that I know won't turn his back on me during my times of darkness.

And if anyone has someone like this in their life, don't take them for granted.

[–]KingDBC 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah. I'm not ashamed to say the most important person in my life is my best friend.

[–]Casual_Tits 27 points28 points  (4 children)

This resonates with me so much. It breaks my fucking heart. But I fucked up before I swallowed TRP. I fucked up a lot. I didn't pay attention to what was happening in my life. But can't not pay attention now.

I'm not gonna fuck up like that again.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child)

I hear you! That shit tore me apart. Trying to rationalize it away was useless and over time I realized that men aren't allowed to be weak. And that trusting someone as much as I trusted her was absolutely foolish. Not having a backup plan was a terrible idea. If I'm depressed I'll be that way around my guy friends. Around women I want to be with intimately I have to maintain frame. Now I'm mostly fighting off oneitis, arguing sunk cost fallacy in my head, and figuring out the best way to next the girls I don't really want to waste time with. They're nice to have around for a backup but this is my movie and they are lucky that I let them be a part of it.

[–]Upvote Me!trpbot[M] 11 points12 points  (1 child)

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[–]HeadingRed 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I want to reject it as well. The fable spun by the other side is so attractive. I can relax, take it easy and live in a fair and honorable world where my love, deeds and actions are returned in kind.

I also want to be a Jedi that meets Jesus when I get to heaven. Fables are so damn attractive.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Sadly poignant. Good quote!

[–]master235 9 points9 points [recovered]

First post because of procrastination: So if I will grow old my wife/relationsship will leave me as soon as I become weak? So EVERY woman cheats if the chemistry and oppurtunity is there, and her attraction for her partner is fading? So no woman can ever be trusted? There are all just animals?

[–]MasonJarTeaDrinker 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Nah man, some may want to but their sexual market value is already low or pretty low so they feel like the can't or they won't due to social pressures.

If you turn into a weak needy little beta though, you better believe that they aren't going to find you sexually attractive and I'm talking about pretty much every high value woman.

[–]zlex 11 points12 points  (1 child)

We are all just animals. No relationship is guaranteed, most end terribly, but sometimes not always.

[–]StarkAtheist 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You're correct.

We are just animals.

A bit more evolved than most animals... but animals nonetheless.

(Except on Black Friday. Every shopping human is a jackal that day.)

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor 6 points7 points  (0 children)

No they don't all cheat. They ALL lose attraction. Choose your poison- a sexless marriage or a divorce are your choices if you grow weak.

[–]RPDBF 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Reading the book now its great

[–]randyzive 2 points3 points  (4 children)

If men understand men, we should just marry each other.

[–]Diarrhea_Van_Frank 12 points13 points  (0 children)

The other day I was thinking about how much easier life would be for me if I were gay. I just ain't, so it's back to the grind.

[–]Wesleykin 45 points46 points  (8 children)

I was called a soul mate by a girl once. We never fucked.

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points  (5 children)

I had a girl who told me she loves me and that I'm "perfect" never fucked$

[–]StarkAtheist 10 points11 points  (3 children)

I had a girl tell me "You are perfect in EVERY WAY..."

She dumped me 2 months later.

I will never be a "nice" beta again.

TRP hurts like hell... but life-changing truth often does.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Please tell me you were a kid.

[–]JSploosh 522 points523 points  (40 children)

ok cypher.

ignorance isn't bliss.

That steak you want isn't real.

[–]1xwm 62 points63 points  (0 children)

That steak you want isn't real.

No, but the memory of it is. It is hard for some to distinguish, and harder for most to forget, even when we know better.

[–][deleted] 43 points43 points

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[–]WindowsDoctor 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Ignorance is fucking bliss.

[–]BorMato 79 points80 points  (9 children)

What a well placed reference.

[–]systemshock869 4 points5 points  (5 children)

But.. but.. that's the point of the 'ignorance..'

[–]1 Endorsed Contributormordanus 179 points180 points x2 (4 children)

Ignorance is regret waiting to happen.

[–]RobbyTheLifeguard 15 points16 points  (2 children)

Mother of god that is one of the smartest things I've ever heard. Did you make that or did you hear it somewhere?

[–]1 Endorsed Contributormordanus 18 points19 points  (1 child)

Just made it up. I thought of my life and how much I regret and how much I wish I could change things due to my ignorance.

[–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (2 children)

The harder I worked to make my wife happy, to reveal my heart, show her who i am, the more she resented me. After swallowing the pill her interest in me has risen AND her ability to take care of her own shit has gone up. The fucking steak is cardboard man.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (4 children)

Unless he's the chosen one

[–][deleted] 24 points25 points  (3 children)

Even then the steak still wouldn't be real. He'd just be able to bend it and shit.

[–]Endorsed ContributorRedBigMan 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No man... he can only bend utensils... so maybe the steak knife.

[–]nechoha 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm watching the movie now in sci fy

[–][deleted] 88 points88 points

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[–][deleted] 49 points50 points  (7 children)

Yeah I used to think that I could eventually rationalize with my mother if I just kept focus and explained shit as coherently as possible. Now I just say "Mother I'm not having this discussion with you. I'm going to do what I'm going to do" and she just constantly says "I LOVE YOU SO MUCH XOXO"

I want her to understand shit rationally because I know it will help her. Now I know she can't.

[–][deleted] 20 points20 points

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[–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (4 children)

You'd think that our mothers for the most part would be on board to raise us to maximize our genetic potential but instead they raise us to be providers.. I never understood why they wouldn't want to raise us to be men -- to be raised to procreate to pass on their genes along with ours.

I hear you so loudly about the mom thing. Part of my bitter/anger phase was directed at my mother for how she raised me; and my dad in near equal parts for not intervening.

I'm glad your mom's on board with the book. Either I'm bad at explaining things to my mother or she REALLY doesn't get it but she's still attempting to appease me to "not hate all women." I tell I her I don't but that I'm definitely NOT looking for marriage or long term stuff, especially at 27 years old.

[–]winndixie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ignorance. And the promises of comfort from feminism. Try not to blame em, bro.

[–]RGIIIsus 43 points43 points [recovered]

She is still a woman, yes, so she will probably respect and love you more when she sees you as Alpha as that lets her lay back and enjoy your loving more. However, she will always love you regardless (even if a little less) and I find this very valuable. I find myself letting all my beta out on her so I don't do it on the women that can and would actually dump me.

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Dont ever love a woman as long your momma love you

[–]calantus 7 points8 points  (0 children)

[deleted]

What is this?

[–]lightfire409 11 points12 points  (3 children)

Huh? Your mother is the literally only women in the world that loves you unconditionally. No matter how beta you are.

[–]1independentmale 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Most mothers love their children unconditionally. Some, sadly, do not.

[–]zeny_two 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sigh. Amen.

When I told my mother that the pretty girl in our family would likely take no jobs after her degree, instead electing to rely on a husband, she told me I was jaded. Three months later, Facebook is littered with wedding pictures, references to children, cooking and homemaking articles. I was surprised that Mom lashed out in defense of team girl, but it's true - AWALT.

[–][deleted] 29 points29 points

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[–]Modredpillschool 181 points182 points  (10 children)

You can't go back and enjoy what life was like before, because life wasn't actually good then. You had hopes/aspirations that one day you could achieve the ultimate blue pill dream-- but that doesn't mean you'd have ever reached it.

What you remember, and what you miss about your old life was a fantasy that you never did and never could achieve.

It's the carrot-and-stick that keeps the blues so darn blue.

[–][deleted] 86 points86 points

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[–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (4 children)

Sounds like something Frank Underwood would say.

[–]emjayt 12 points13 points  (1 child)

Then tap his class ring on the table as he walks out of the room

[–]LoveOfThreeLemons 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Or Don Draper. "My life moves one direction--forward"

[–]DoctorsHateHim 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Why. Because if you do not explain why, then it has much less lasting impact on people reading this. You should point out what you gain by adopting this mindset.

[–]draketton 24 points25 points  (3 children)

my answer is a dualistic strategy, just like women use

don't try to fuck the women you confide in

[–]RPL23 1 points1 points [recovered]

this is brilliant. this should be the filter new guys to RP should use when meeting a woman.

would you rather fuck her or tell her your problems? if you want to fuck her, be RP and play the Game.

if you want to confide your problems with her, dont try to fuck her. be BPish (not too much or you'll go back to old ways in all aspects).

worse of all, imo: if she gets you to confide, she's playing you into a position where you won't be able to fuck her.

HOLD. FRAME.

edit: some added notes.

[–]2johnnight 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think I once fucked up a good thing by making this error. A necessary lesson.

[–]1NPIF 62 points63 points  (1 child)

You don't really want your blissful ignorance back. You're just upset that your fantasy wasn't real.

This is part of swallowing the pill. Accepting that what we're raised to believe as boys is not the reality we face as men. And that becoming a happy, successful man requires you to adapt to this change in your belief system.

We all wish that the blue pill, fantasy-land where we can be open and honest and not spin plates and have that blissful LTR with a perfect woman who loves us unconditionally was true. But it never will be. So suck it up and make the best of it, because the world isn't going to change just because you ask nicely.

[–]damndirtyhippy 12 points13 points  (0 children)

That is a powerful statement you just made. It applies to life overall and not just with male / female relationships.

"The world isn't going to change just because you ask nicely."

A favorite comedian of mine, Doug Stanhope, talks about how he 'figured out' a lot of shit that is wrong with humanity and has said it all on stage but no one listens and nothing changes. This dichotomy between dudes and dudettes is not going to change so hop on board, gentlemen.

edit: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XCGkVyyDOcU

[–]LibertarianLibertine 88 points89 points  (20 children)

What you really need is male friends and beer, because that's where you are allowed to complain and open up.

[–]1CaptainFalconer 21 points22 points  (2 children)

What's interesting to me, is that it's almost like the beer allows social permission for men to open up to each other. Like suddenly it's not considered to be "unmanly" on that specific context.

Also, camping with beer is interesting, because it's like a whole weekend of shooting the shit.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (1 child)

add your favourite music festival and it's all you need to unwind..

[–]Johnny10toes 13 points14 points  (3 children)

That would be nice but I've never allowed myself to open up to anyone totally except one person, my wife, and that backfired. When I was really young I shared something personal with another person and I was betrayed. Since then I've been a clam.

[–]Apollo1982 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Been in the same boat. Anytime you open up is a risk. You just need to be gradual in the level of trust you place in people. Test the waters and see if they talk about you. Reward is when you find someone who will keep your trust and you can really talk about stuff to them. True friends are rare.

[–]DoctorsHateHim 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I would suggest to you to read up on the ego and how it fucks with your perception of the outside world, by observing your automatic emotional response from a higher vantage point you can see how irrational some reactions we all have are.

[–]heeb 34 points35 points  (4 children)

God damn, had that last night. Just me, my male friends, and good (German) beer.

God, it's good to just talk men shit once in a while…

[–]Casanova-Quinn 29 points30 points  (2 children)

[–]heeb 5 points6 points  (0 children)

That's gold. Haven't seen the movie; an omission I will need to rectify soon. Thx for this.

[–]lucoztazade 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Absolutely brilliant movie.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (4 children)

Male friends? They are all beta bitches. They don't talk as men. They squawk like bitches about the same three or four "male" topics (guns, politics, and Japanese anime) like pissed off commentators on the TV news. And like Orwell's telescreen that shit never turns off.

And we can't openly endorse TRP. We have to subtly introduce concepts and plant seeds. If any RP concepts do come up in conversation, each one of these fuckers will pontificate at length at how "alpha" they really then turn around and lose frame like beta bitches. Fuck! I just want to put a gag in these fuckers' mouths and go "WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU?!"

And these are my friends.

Beer? I'm trying to lose some damn weight. I don't want to undo my gains by drinking beer. I don't even drink cola anymore.

The Red Pill is a bitter pill indeed.

It's worth it to have finally f-closed with a woman I've been orbiting for years

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dude you should get some new friends.

I mean, friends with differing opinions can be helpful but if they can't truly relate to you, they're more like aquintessences.

If I mention to my friends anything about my severe depression or constant need for escapism, or the immense disdain I hold for certain entitled, sadistic women, they just reply "me too."

[–]Endorsed ContributorRedBigMan 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Yeah fuck beer... real men do shots of vodka if they want to get drunk!

[–]nubfilter 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Something I've always been curious about.. I'm one of the few unmarried males in my main group of friends. I don't pull 'a lot' of pussy because I'm busy but some. Before TRP I would have said FWBs. some longer term, others not so much.

I do not bring girls around my main group because I don't want them hearing the other girls say "Oh you two are good together" and "we need to get you married" blah blah blah. For those of you in an LTR (but unmarried) what are your go to tactics to protect against(or inoculate your girl for lack of a better term) the other women unwinding all of your training and bringing her into their frame?

Edit: I should add, the 'girls' in the group are (pardon the pun) pretty tight. 10+ years as friends for 95% call each other sisters and so on.

[–]otiswild 28 points29 points  (1 child)

Want in one hand and shit in the other, and see which one fills up first.

[–]Turkerthelurker 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Holy hell I love this quote. To contribute a favorite of mine:

“Two hands working can do more than a thousand clasped in prayer.”

― Madalyn Murray O'Hair

[–]metallica11 71 points72 points  (17 children)

The trade off and sad fact about shifting the way your treat women to align with the red pill mindset is that you tend to lose parts of a relationship that really made you connect with someone at a deeper and honest level. the soulmate experience if you will. The openness to be completely honest about our feelings.

you aren't allowed to display true vulnerability

you aren't allowed to truly grieve

you need to maintain frame despite how hard you fall for her

It's all about staying closed, and that is what hurts. I love and cherish openness. this openness is what makes me really connect with someone. Without it women are just pawn in the game of life, dehumanized etc. Only for my fulfillment and enjoyment. What happened to being openly selfless?

Religion allowed people to love unconditionally, the thought that whatever pain you were going through in your physical life there was a light at the end of the tunnel in terms of salvation. Now that agnostics and atheists are climbing, there is no motivation to truly care for someone if they continuously cause you pain for the rest of your life.

[–]RobNine 22 points23 points  (1 child)

Back when I was in HS I learned about Stoicism. I've made it my life goal to be as close to the thoughts of the original meaning of it as written by Zeno.

"The Stoics did not seek to extinguish emotions; rather, they sought to transform them by a resolute "askēsis" that enables a person to develop clear judgment and inner calm"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stoicism#Ethics_and_virtues

[–]Iramohs 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I've been unknowingly doing this for years. Good to know there are fellows like me in this world.

[–]deadgod1 14 points15 points  (3 children)

Yes, TRP has killed romantic/unconditional love for men. The trade off is it increases the chances of sex and relationships

[–][deleted] 70 points71 points  (1 child)

It killed off the illusion.

It never existed in the first place.

When you are vulnerable in front of your LTR you are taking a chance with her attraction to you every time!

[–]accursed_wolf 11 points12 points  (0 children)

The illusion of blue pill is what we were fed for so long that it makes sense to wish you could have that life again. I had a period where I reminisced about my blue pill days until I started remembering how that life is actually harder and it gets you nowhere.

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Well no, the current state of our society has killed it. TRP is our Plan B

[–]joncho 10 points11 points  (9 children)

I don't agree at all with what you are saying.

you tend to lose parts of a relationship that really made you connect with someone at a deeper and honest level. the soulmate experience if you will. The openness to be completely honest about our feelings.

You were not connecting at athe deepest level, betas don't connect at a deeper level. You were just being selfish and leeching from her instead of fulfilling your role.

Connecting doesn't mean having to say everything and expect the other person to agree on everything. Connecting means looking at the other person and knowing that despite the differences and different strategies you are both pushing in the same direction.

Do I get the feeling sometimes that I deserve to have my wife act like a mother and love me no matter what? Yes, I bet we all do. But I quickly recognize that is a selfish though and I'm just trying to skip my end of the bargain. It's not fair to her. She is your partner not your mother.

Religion allowed people to love unconditionally, the thought that whatever pain you were going through in your physical life there was a light at the end of the tunnel in terms of salvation. Now that agnostics and atheists are climbing, there is no motivation to truly care for someone if they continuously cause you pain for the rest of your life.

Religion allowed you to keep sustaining the pain in hopes of a doubtful promise, thus reducing the incentive to do something to change the situation. Killing the dream and accepting there is nothing else forces you to do something about the pain here and now. There is no second life, you need to try harder in this one. It's empowering.

[–]soulmatter 5 points6 points  (8 children)

There is no second life, you need to try harder in this one. It's empowering.

I've never taken this view on religion. For one reason: religion allows you to let go of the fears that you have concerning your one life in this world. To not be afraid to die (assuming of course you're not going to hell). It tells you to let go of the risks and be all you can be in this life. Because even though you're just passing through, you're still working for the next life.

[–]joncho 2 points3 points  (1 child)

What works for you works for you.

But why work for something that is a doubtful promise and sounds too much like a fantasy when you can dedicate your energy to having the best life you can here and now? Why endure shit for a promise when you can adjust your mentallity to make the best of reality, not the best of something that might never happen? I understand that you think it's making your life easier but it's also conditioning the way you adapt to reality by taking away some of the incentives to make the best for you of here and now.

[–]soulmatter 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I understand where you're coming from, but you're projecting your perception of how I run/"limit" my life concerning my belief in an afterlife. EDIT: I want to add that my belief in an afterlife has given more purpose to my life. That there's more to life than just what I see at the moment with my limited senses. That perhaps our time here has a purpose beyond our current comprehension.

[–]1independentmale 1 point2 points  (5 children)

There is no hell. It is but a charade designed to frighten you into compliance.

[–]soulmatter 1 point2 points  (4 children)

I'm impressed that you're so confident in your belief. We live such insulated, painless lives. It would be awful if an ocean of torment was waiting for us after death, despite following all the rules.

Why do we even need to experience pain? Why are we not just an infinitely reacting collection of molecules? Should we not just be automatons without souls then?

[–]1independentmale 2 points3 points  (3 children)

It would be awful if an ocean of torment was waiting for us after death, despite following all the rules.

Whose rules? There are hundreds of different religions and sets of spiritual beliefs. Most of them are in direct conflict with one another. Many of them proclaim their way is the only way and all others are going to one version of hell or another. People of the same religion can't even agree on the rules. There are numerous sects or denominations within the major religions who believe their particular take is the only way.

Let's say there is a hell. How do you pick which rules to follow in order to avoid being sent there? For most of us, the choice is made by our parents. We are all products of our environment. I was born into a Christian nation, raised Catholic and taught to believe in Jesus. Had I been born in Saudi Arabia, however, I would have almost certainly been raised as a Muslim. Born elsewhere, I might be a Jew, or a follower of Hinduism or any number of other religions. Whether I go to heaven or hell, therefore, seems to be based on nothing more than dumb luck, at least if you subscribe to the "our way is the only way to heaven" mantra that most religions postulate. If you're lucky enough to be born in the right nation to the right parents and taught the right things, you're in. Otherwise you burn for eternity in a lake of fire through no fault of your own (thanks, mom and dad :/ ).

I find the entire notion ridiculous. If there is a God who created us and loves us, it seems unlikely that such an entity would damn us to such a place - and if he would, then fuck him. I wouldn't bow down to a cocksucker like that anyway.

[–][deleted] 42 points43 points  (4 children)

You only remember the good side of the bp. Reflect for a moment on the negative side and feel blessed.

[–]1independentmale 6 points7 points  (2 children)

This bears repeating. We tend to remember the good and forget the bad, especially when it comes to relationships.

Toward the end of my marriage, I began keeping a diary of my wife's antics. I had started to notice a pattern in her behavior, a crazy cycle, if you will. On more than one occasion I found myself thinking, "Didn't we just fucking go through this?" Since the cycle usually lasted several months, it was just long enough for me to forget and let things return to normal before fucking she-rex showed up again to fuck up my world and blame it on me. So I started writing shit down, marking an electronic calendar up with colors and log entries to track her behavior. I did this for nearly two years, verified my hypothesis that she really was crazy as fuck and there was nothing wrong with me, and divorced the nutcase.

After she had been gone for awhile, I had dark moments where I missed her. Moments where I wanted to call her up and make amends because of all the good memories. It was during those moments that I pulled out my log entries. It never took more than a few sentences to remember all the hell she put me through and how much better off I am without her.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child)

This is a fucking great, brillant idea. May I borrow it?

[–]DoctorWelch 10 points10 points [recovered]

"You know, I know this steak doesn't exist. I know that when I put it in my mouth, the Matrix is telling my brain that it is juicy and delicious. After nine years, you know what I realize?"

[Takes a bite of steak]

"Ignorance is bliss."

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I was thinking of the same scene reading the OP.

We were sold this lie as children of true love and soul mates. We believed it because people of authority, people we trusted, told us it was true. Then we grew up and the illusion fell apart.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (2 children)

My advice to you is to stop looking at a romantic relationship as the singular bond that will satisfy all of your social needs. Instead look to your family/friends for social experiences that allows you to attain what you desire. We have this ridiculous notion in western culture that our SO should also become our best friend. Its nonsensical.

[–][deleted] 62 points63 points  (21 children)

You can have it.

You can find her.

You WILL find her.

And it will be wonderful, and it will last quite a while, anywhere from 6-7 months to 6-7 years; then inevitably, she will either leave you or you'll grow apart, or she'll do something to make you leave; and that's if you're lucky, worst case scenario . . . you know.

So, if you are willing to have a series of long term relationships in your life that will start absolutely great, then settle for middle of the road, only to end sourly in a way that leaves you empty and mildly depressed, go for it.

EDIT: Thank you for the Gold Stranger

[–]alwayzhongry 9 points10 points  (6 children)

so true. my unicorn relationship lasted 10 years through the thick and thin. her sticking by through my difficult times blued me up to her and here I am now. never thought it would be possible for it to end the way it did.

[–]MaxManus 5 points6 points  (3 children)

I can feel you. Just going through the same for the last 4 month.

It was ..OK when it ended, how it ended, but then we fell back on each other and I never thought that what she then did was ever possible.

I feel a different kind of sadness then ever before and I am not sure if it because she can't love like I do, or because I am so angry at myself for ever letting her back in my life in the first place, or letting down my guard for the slightest.

She was the sweetest person I ever met and now she is more or less a whore to me.

[–]Soultrane9 2 points2 points [recovered]

She was the sweetest person I ever met and now she is more or less a whore to me.

And should stay a whore to you. YOUR whore. You can have your hugs and sweetness from her but that requires fucking her half dead and holding your frame. This is a woman's real sweetness not that illusion bullshit you were having in the first place.

[–]MaxManus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't think so. I am more heading towards MGTOW right now as I am disgusted by women for now.

[–]Zokura 14 points15 points  (8 children)

Just broke up with my girlfriend of 1 year half an hour ago.

It was a freaking mess, hell I even shed a tear too. She was such a good person and really good to me. But she ultimately held back, she didn't push me. I could have settled for some mediocre years with her, but I would always be thinking what if?

It started off absolutely great, but that's the thing, it fades and you settle for "good enough". Life is game but you only get one turn.

[–][deleted] 4 points4 points

[permanently deleted]

[–]SlootShamer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This sounds very "carrot and stick" to me.

[–]Wheat-Thins 0 points1 point  (2 children)

You dumped a girl because she doesnt shit test you enough?

[–]LibertarianLibertine 8 points9 points  (1 child)

No, even in those relationships OP would need to hold frame.

[–][deleted] 28 points29 points  (0 children)

My point is that he can Beta his way through a relationship, yet it will degenerate with time.

[–]MojoMoley 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Hey buddy, uhm...what about couples who are married 50+ years until their death?

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Couples who today have been married for 50+ year are about 70+ year old; meaning they were born right around 1940's (before WWII), different times, different culture, different upbringing, not the same ballgame as today's culture.

[–]erwgv3g34 16 points17 points  (1 child)

Repeat after me:

What is true is already so.
Owning up to it doesn't make it worse.
Not being open about it doesn't make it go away.
And because it's true, it is what is there to be interacted with.
Anything untrue isn't there to be lived.
People can stand what is true,
for they are already enduring it.

And again:

If the red pill is correct,
I desire to believe that the red pill is correct;
If the red pill is not correct,
I desire to believe that the red pill is not correct;
Let me not become attached to beliefs I may not want.

Given that I live in this horrible world, I do not wish I could regurgitate the red pill. What I wish is that the world was not horrible, so that I would not need the knowledge of the red pill.

[–]1800-afkmotivate 13 points14 points  (5 children)

Read a book about meaning instead of power.

Meditations by Marcus Aurelius, Concluding Unscientific Postscript by Soren Kierkegaard

[–]tyranus89 4 points5 points  (4 children)

Existentialism is a great way to deal with huge shocks to personal philosophy. Nietzsche specifically is good to read after swallowing TRP.

[–][deleted] 7 points7 points

[permanently deleted]

[–]Dreamtrain 32 points33 points  (9 children)

We already know, because those of us who were BP were fed their line of thinking, so I can answer you as if I was a 2XC poster:

"It's okay to feel this way, just be yourself, don't push yourself to be someone you're not. Don't let anyone make you think its wrong to be weak or vulnerable sometimes, life happens, if someone doesn't appreciates your highs without your downs then they don't deserve you, and guess what? This girl is probably just not the right one for you, the right one is right is probably around the corner, just be patient, she will come along."

I know, right? It does sound very alluring and nice. I'd like to see what TBP sub has to say though, even if its satire, there's some truth usually behind every little post/comment.

[–]topspeedj 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Probably quite close to what they'd say. What I saw there:

"Meaningless cliché, cliché, cliché. Meaningless cliché, cliché, cliché. Meaningless cliché, cliché, cliché. Meaningless cliché, cliché, cliché. Meaningless cliché, cliché, cliché."

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

You get used to it. I...I don't even see the hamster. All I see is blonde, brunette, red-head.

[–]fatw 9 points9 points [recovered]

Hot damn. You're good at that.

[–]Dreamtrain 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I've actually told other men those lines in the past. If I could travel back in time I'd pop out and tell past me "Great advice, how's that working out for YOU?"

[–]1xwm 2 points3 points  (1 child)

And if you ever made a move on the person who said that using the things she said:

"I'm not good enough, you need to find someone better."

Or

"I just don't have the time for a relationship right now."

(Or insert other bs)

[–]Dreamtrain 9 points10 points  (0 children)

"I'm not good enough, you need to find someone better." is a line I got by 5 different women in a row. Then they would go for men, that lets say the kind of men their mothers/fathers would not be proud of, and I'd be dumbfounded, it really does a number on your self-esteem when you are taught that BP is the way and you BP harder than anyone you know.

Then you start to see yourself be treated like shit because of the way you are and you can't quite come up with an explanation of why shit is happening because you're doing everything you were taught was the right way and the way to be a good person, reinforced by people around you telling you how you're "such a great guy", "don't change", etc. so you start to victimize yourself because if you're doing everything right then everyone else must be wrong, after all you're just being yourself, so the problem isn't you.

Now you are not just heartbroken, clueless about why bad things are happening to you, with zero self-esteem and spiraling into depression but have also relinquished any control or responsibility to change anything by adopting a victim mentality.

And they still wonder why we read TRP. BP can do a number on men's life, but nobody wants to admit it. I for one am glad I'm out of that vicious cycle.

[–]krystyin 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow - you should write a book - BP vs. RP

[–]cashmoney_x 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Have you considered that all you really want is for it to be easy?

[–]1dongpal 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I, too, sometimes dream about my wonder lamp and flying carpet. But some things exist and some don't.

[–]theredpillthrow 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I can relate a little bit. There are times where it'd be nice to confide in someone, you feel like you're emotionally flexed 24-7.

My confession: I talk to my parents and grandmother a lot when I feel this way. Women seem to be wiser after menopause, hopefully you can find someone to confide in, if not, try therapy (with a man).

You're allowed to have your weakness, just don't let your see woman it.

as for the unicorn that will love you, sorry man. I wished santa was real when I was a kid, but we all gotta grow up sometime. This is just Santa 2.0

[–]Unfiltered_Soul 12 points13 points  (0 children)

This reminds me of that one article about a 40 year old woman that regreted breaking up with his man 10 years prior because she thought she had limitless options.

[–]1NV0K3R 15 points16 points  (7 children)

I actually thought about this today.

I remember way back when, with my first girls, how happy and exciting it was, those fucking tingles, and how they could do no wrong.

Now women come and go, and I wonder, will I ever feel™ that way again.

I probably won't. Love isn't real. It's just serotonin and dopamine being secreted from the brain. I have to make myself happy. And I will.

[–]wheyapartment 9 points10 points  (3 children)

Don't lose hope.

You can improve the functionality of your dopamine sensors, you know? Chances are they're burnt out from overstimulation like porn, video games, drugs, or any other addiction. Just google it. Personally, my problem was porn addiction and video games and I"m fixing it at the moment. I've been clean for 8 months now. The difference is startling: I highly recommend it.

And no, I'm not religious. I was only convinced after seeing the science/theory behind it.

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well I am religious so downvote me to hell.

The Bible is the penultimate Red Pill book which has been perverted by feminist inspired churchianity.

[–]MasonJarTeaDrinker 2 points3 points  (2 children)

I remember way back when, with my first girls, how happy and exciting it was, those fucking tingles, and how they could do no wrong.

I still remember that also, it was such a great feeling back then, I do remember most of those relationships crashing and burning though.

It's good to reminisce but I feel better now that I don't get needy with women.

[–]aa223 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You are in the depression phase. You realize that the reality is so horrible that you were much happier being ignorant to the truth. Although in my opinion, the red pill is only one of many truths out there. Just remember why you swallowed the red pill in the first place. Remember that you weren't happy putting women on the pedestal and remember that you wanted to be more than just a beta bux. Just remember why you did this in the first place.

Also, keep in mind that if you are depressed this place is here to help you with that. And I also feel the same way you do but with what has been happening in terms of the women, I am becoming more and more cynical towards this disney fantasy. In any case, all you need to do is remember.

[–]sdfghjklooo 5 points6 points  (0 children)

That's where we all started. Accept reality not fantasy.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I want a woman who will love me for me, who will keep loving me if were to lose everything, if I stopped making her feel secure, if I stopped giving her the tinglies, if I lost frame.

What you're describing is a mother and this is a universal feeling. It's the same with a father to a daughter.

[–]reason_is_why 4 points5 points  (0 children)

" A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool."

William Shakespeare

[–]frequentlywrong 24 points25 points  (2 children)

Sometimes I wish I never swallowed the red pill.

That's just stupid. Those beta losers live absolutely miserable lives. The older ones are beaten down husks of men.

[–]Senior Contributorexit_sandman 11 points12 points  (0 children)

That's just stupid. Those beta losers live absolutely miserable lives.

Not necessarily (at least not initiatlly). Why do you think are so many guys so invested in their BP mindset? Because they're actually happier that way - provided they succeed in finding their unicornor_who_they_think_is_one .

For them, falling in love is a bit like having your first crush when you were still a teen and totally oblivious to anything. Swallowing the pill is, in a way, like growing up and having to face reality - if you could have opted to stay young forever and everything that it entails, can't you imagine people going for that option? That's also why the RP/BP-metaphore is such a good fit. Because, as Cypher said, ignorance is bliss.

[–]Santo26 13 points14 points  (1 child)

[–]TRP VanguardYouDislikeMyOpinion 11 points12 points  (2 children)

I stopped fighting reality a long time ago.

I saw the truth and said to myself "well, this is how it actually is".

Then it took me much time to come to accept it.

Now I don't see any other way to live. It's like growing up to know you can't fly. Sure flying would kick ass, but I'm not going to live my life thinking of how awesome it would be to fly every day. And then you never think about how awesome it would be to fly again. You enjoy what you can in life.

I'm not going to fight reality.

[–]FallenHighSchoolJock 8 points9 points  (1 child)

I agree with OP, but this life is unobtainable for most men. You basically need to be born 8/10 handsome, talented and with an alpha low inhibitions personality to go through life thinking this whilst also having success with women. I would give anything to be put back into the matrix as a male model, blissfully unaware of the real social dynamics between men and women, thinking that people loved me for my personality when in reality all they care about is my face and status. I could be successful in a career and think it was all based on my own merits. I could have lots of friends and girlfriends and think that they all loved me. I could get back into writing, and fiction and watch movies at face value and not see hypergamy, out of control feminism and the halo effect everywhere. Alas we were born genetic trash incels, at least we can do something about it. However most incels make this realization subconsciously and turn into Elliot Rodgers.

[–]a_chill_bro 2 points3 points  (2 children)

It sounds like you haven't yet fully accepted the truth. A part of you deep down inside has not yet peeled through enough layers of the false social constructs (feminism, blue pill, etc.) to make the full transition into a full application of TRP (aka Sociopathy).

Once you fully accept and apply TRP you will feel empty inside. You feel no emotional connection to any relationships with your plates because you recognize them as bullshit to begin with. In turn though, they are fully emotionally invested. All you see is code (shit tests, etc.).

For anyone reading this I would highly recommend that they read The Gervais Principle. It's a game changer.

http://www.ribbonfarm.com/the-gervais-principle/

Its a bit of a read but well worth it.

[–]socalnonsage 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Long time lurker, first time coming out in TRP but this thread struck a chord which I needed to respond to.

I'm 38, married, kids, and RP swallower. I can honestly say that I'm happier than I've ever been in my life (and my wife can proclaim the same). She's a very strong woman with a successful career and there's nothing that pleases her more than to serve me.


I can assure you that SHE (your girlfriend) wants needs you to be RP.

  • She wants needs a leader.
  • She wants needs to be given tingles.
  • She wants needs you to be decisive when she's not.
  • She wants needs you to show her that you're in control and you can protect her.
  • She wants needs you to be confident and secure in yourself.

The sooner you understand this, the better off you'll be.

[–]abbw2000 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You need to see agent Smith about that: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z7BuQFUhsRM

[–]2RedPill4LYF 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We all want this. No one is here because this is what they always wanted. Female nature is inherently dysfunctional. This is the truth. Without the order of a masculine man, women stray and make poor decisions. A man's life is infinitely more difficult because we shoulder 100% of the responsibility for maintaining relationships.

[–]deepsouthscoundrel 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I want a woman who will love me for me, who will keep loving me if were to lose everything, if I stopped making her feel secure, if I stopped giving her the tinglies, if I lost frame.

When you think about it this makes no sense. Why would she continue to feel that you're special when you're actively demonstrating to her that you aren't? Sure, it sounds nice in concept, but in order for this to be reality it would take women acting in opposition to their own interests. Never going to happen.

The good news is that once you accept that romantic love is conditional you are able to understand the condition and meet it, should you choose to do so. You can't expect to meet a condition you never knew was there, and this is why so many bluepill relationships fail. They don't know what they're doing wrong because they won't accept that wrong can be done.

[–]howie777 2 points3 points  (0 children)

hey thank you for this. I'm going to save this post as I feel the same way as you do. Getting pussy is not an issue, and I don't put the pussy on a pedestal. And just like you I've noticed that when I showed my insecurities, the girls I thought would hold it down, ran away. And this is what hurts because true love, and I do believe in it, is there for you when you do feel insecure. All this holding frame BS works, but I think you and I look for more than just a submissive, obeying lover. We want a soulmate. True love when you feel down, and when you feel good. I remember my mom told me that a girl doesn't truly love you when she won't keep up with you in your weak moments, or when you're acting beta, whatever that means. i'm a human and if I feel insecure, I'm not going to hide it. The woman who still holds it down, that will be the one I'd like to see for a long time. Someone who understands my sensitive side.

[–]CruiseCruise 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just sit in a chair and look at your life and recognize that you're perfectly fine right now, there's no reason you're not enough. The whole idea you're not enough came from people trying to manipulate you.

So just look, and let go of the bullshit idea that you even need a unicorn. It's just bullshit. just look.

You're totally complete without it.

[–][deleted] 31 points32 points  (4 children)

Yeah and I wish Pokemon were real. Get over it and grow up.

[–]thepastIdwell 27 points27 points [recovered]

"Just accept this extremely horrible reality of our world right now! And never look back."

Can't he just get to mourn for a while? Jebus man, show some empathy.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Maybe I've been here too long. I get tired of this shit

[–]TheRealMewt 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You know what the Red Pill can teach a man, so you know what you need to do to condition yourself to perform otherwise.

Just don't come crying back here when that blissful ignorance you so yearn for blows up in your face and you have nobody to show for it.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (9 children)

You make me sad. Is it so incredibly hard to understand that there could be something in between juvenile naivety and blind TRP-biologism?

Yes, young people dream of soulmates, and then they grow older and learn that soulmates probably don't exist. And then they learn that the bread&butter of a partnership is this: WORK (no, i am not speaking about lifting). Love is an act, it's something you do. And at some point you have to make a decision to go through with it even if things become tough.

This is pretty easy to understand if you take into consideration the fact that humans are mindboggingly complex beings - with their consciousness, their different upbringing, their traumas and bad experiences, their different genetic starting conditions and what not. There is no way to ensure compatibility. It requires constant adjustments, and after years people usually develop a pretty good intuition, which lowers the effort required to maintain a partnership.

And the reward? A partnership between peers. No captain/1st officer bullshit. Two human beings fully aware of what they are doing and why. Something redpillers will never experience if they don't get rid of their simplistic p.o.v.

If you turn your own household into an experimental configuration to test manipulative techniques you might succeed in manipulating someone, but you will end up living with a "partner" who is either broken, silenced or naturally free of any ambition. How is this person supposed to enrich your life?

And now you have the mess. I honestly don't know what to say to you! You done goofed!

This is by far the most ruthless comment i have ever written. I am really upset. Sorry for that. Your post presents a good essence of what's wrong with TRP. It makes me rage and cry at the same time. Talk to your wife. I mean: talk to her as if she was a human being with own thoughts. Maybe she's way more interesting than you have ever imagined. I fucking don't know... this is sooo fucked up.

Young redpillers: read this and be warned. Someone hand me a handkerchief, please...

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (5 children)

And then they learn that the bread&butter of a partnership is this: WORK (no, i am not speaking about lifting). Love is an act, it's something you do. And at some point you have to make a decision to go through with it even if things become tough. There is no way to ensure compatibility. It requires constant adjustments, and after years people usually develop a pretty good intuition, which lowers the effort required to maintain a partnership.

That is quite true.

Talk to your wife. I mean: talk to her as if she was a human being with own thoughts. Maybe she's way more interesting than you have ever imagined.

You can only talk to a female lover in a way that does not show weakness. Sure, you can get away with showing weakness from time to time. In fact, it's even better to show a few moments of weakness that you then address and become obviously stronger from. But if you constantly confide your fears or show your weaknesses, the first thing that happens is she loses her attraction to you. And it's all downhill after that. No one is perfect and lapses are normal. However, the important thing is that you need to have an overall forward direction in life in order to maintain a LTR successfully. You have to keep things positive and playful or else suffer the consequences. Your confidence has to be quite consistent.

[–]ogrethebuffoon 1 point2 points  (1 child)

This brings up a false dichotomy in some ways.

You can still maintain frame and have a genuine connection with someone.

Having a genuine connection as a masculine man with a feminine women does NOT mean that you show vulnerability to her. It means penetrating her in all ways.

If you want to open up and be vulnerable with someone, that's what your family, friends, and coaches/therapists are for.

You aren't trying to fuck those people and maintain a passionate balance of opposite energies with them.

Of course, you should probably sprinkle in some beta tears to make yourself LTR material to the women you're interested in, but you should be the pure masculine alpha 95% of the time otherwise you're going to lose them.

It sounds like you just need some male friends to talk to about your problems.

Your emotional needs aren't being completely met so you've invested yourself in the unicorn fantasy as a glimmer of hope. Satisfy your emotional needs outside of the women you fuck and you won't care about unicorns. In fact, if and when a real unicorn does come along, you will be in a much better position to attract her because you won't be coming from a needy, desperate place.

[–]Armonsters 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What you think and see in your mind you will become. If it is not making you happy as a person who cares if it's supposed too. TRP is right about a lot of things but does that mean it makes my life better always to subscribe to it? No in cases like that it's best to do what truly makes you happy, if you're a beta at heart who cares if it isn't "possible" who cares as long as you are your primary concern and are happy you're good. Putting pussy on a pedestal is still occurring if your whole game plan is to create subservience because you're still focusing on it more than anything else.

[–]soulmatter 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The love you desire originated from your mother's love. And that's something that another woman can never provide for you. Internalize that the only love you'll get out of your woman is the one she'll give to the kids that you provide her. She may desire to keep you interested in her in an emulation of what you think of love, but she won't love you the way you love her. A man's love is different than a woman's love. Her true love is reserved for her children.

[–]favourthebold 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm glad I read this. Since I got blocked on facebook by a girl I 'loved' I really don't ever think like this anymore. Your girl sounds awesome. I really have no idea why people even want a relationship. If you can get laid without one, why would you want a girlfriend.

I have like zero interest in a girl 'understanding me' haha. Who gives a fuck. Quite grateful for that.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

In theory, the unicorn you want does exist.

Keep in mind that RedPill theory bases itself on most of the population, and predicts the most likely event/outcome. 95%+ of women can be adequately analyzed using RedPill theory. However, there are those women that deviate from the rules, but they are rare, and you usually find them doing research in a lab or some extremely specialized job.

I work in the medical field, and I can tell you that I have seen good looking and very intelligent women dating/married to beta men, who have never been with an "alpha", nor are they into them, and are perfectly happy with their lives and husbands. These are the women who literally want a companion who can challenge them mentally, etc., but even in my field they are uncommon.

Anyways, you won't be finding these women in clubs or bars, and rarely will you see them out shopping. They're usually working or reading or enjoy some quirky hobby.

[–]drowninginfootwear 1 point2 points  (0 children)

These commenters are overreacting. It is correct to want what you want. Don't live your life based on the red pill, or any one philosophy for that matter.

The stuff on this reddit is good to internalize, which you have. It has let you become a better man, with more successful relationships. You don't need to stick around and keep pounding it into your head. You're done, you've graduated.

Now you can use what you've learned in your real life, without feeling the need to come here every day and let the constant parade of hopeless, pathetic, bitter, resentfulness dull your mind.

You CAN find love. You CAN find a woman who cares about you. Any one on here who is saying otherwise is either missing the point of the red pill entirely, or still in it's early stages.

[–]bananashammock 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Maybe you want to truly open yourself up to someone that does the same to you. So that you know everything about each other and there's no fear, it's all alright. That stuff isn't just a fantasy. There are many people that have that. Don't play stupid fucking games and worry about control over a loved one. For fuck's sake, thats for insecure teenagers. And so is that thought of a unicorn, or one true soulmate, or whatever.

[–]raralala99 1 point2 points  (0 children)

where can I read up on maintaining "frame?"

[–]othereal 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Out of Frame out of Mind

A nice thought I have been bouncing around in my head today.

[–]TRP Vanguard: "Dark Triad Expert"IllimitableMan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you have the concentration I really recommend reading my newest piece. It addresses the BP fantasy that like OP, most men struggle to come to terms with, and then some.

[–]ThisIsMyLulzyAccount 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ok, I'm relatively new to TRP, but what the actual fuck is going on in these comments? The guy just wants a woman he can be exposed with; he wants a girl he can fundamentally trust and respect as a human, or at least that's what I see in his post- unconditional love from a mate who loves him for him and not for what he can provide.

And everyone is saying that this is a complete fantasy? What? I must be missing something, please, what am I not getting here? I thought this was relatively common. My gf and I have been going out for almost 3 years and I don't have to put up a strong front for her, and she doesn't put on a front for me, we're honest with each other and shit works out fine.

Though to his comments about his girlfriend, it is the same reason I switched from trying to be alpha to being what I really am; omega. This guy might be similar. You don't want a toy, there is no humanity in a toy, nothing deserving of love in something that is completely receptive-- to have a gf that you can order around completely is pointless, why not just have a robot? Maybe it is just me here, and tell me if it is, but having a completely submissive partner is, to me, kind of pointless.

To me it sounds like this guy needs to break it off and find someone who loves him for him, not someone who only loves him as a provider/protector.

[–]Dubsland12 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You want a guy. Emotionally at least.

[–]HalfysReddit 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dude here's the harsh truth - you're looking for the love you received from your mother, and that shit ain't gonna happen.

I'm talking about that unconditional love. The love you got just because you existed, not because of how you made the other party feel.

Don't believe me? Read your own words:

I want a woman who will love me for me, who will keep loving me if were to lose everything, if I stopped making her feel secure, if I stopped giving her the tinglies, if I lost frame.

Would you love a woman who didn't provide what you wanted out of the relationship? If she didn't make you feel secure, if she didn't give you any tingles, if she didn't in some way improve your quality of life? No, of course not. Unless maybe she was your daughter.

[–]SlutRapunzel 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey. I'm probably the only one in this community who thinks it, but...

You can get it. The whole package. It includes compromise and throwing down walls and sacrifice, but it's there.

Never give up.

[–]prodigyx 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No one said it would be easy. None of the things worth doing in life are easy.

[–]zenswag 2 points3 points  (1 child)

How the hell does this have so much karma? Is beta bitching really this valuable?

[–]ezlove8 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Man if you're not happy in a relationship, get out if it. Be a fucking man and make your own decisions, don't just come to the internet and bitch about it. Just because some bros on the internet say something isn't possible doesn't make it so. It's your life, do what you want with it, don't settle for bullshit. There may not be the perfect person out there but there sure has to be someone close, and I'm sure as hell not gonna let some dude sitting behind a computer tell me that there isn't. "I'm a beta at heart," you don't have to label yourself as alpha or beta or shit, you are you. You know what makes you happy and life worth living. If you're just gonna live in a world of this pseudo-happiness some comments talk about, then what's the point of staying alive?

That being said, I love the red pill, but everything on here needs to be read with a grain of salt. I think that it is a mindset every guy should have when approaching women, but it shouldn't be used to determine your happiness. Use the red pill to help you find and establish a relationship that makes you happy, but don't let it run your life.

[–]Indeed_suh 1 point2 points  (10 children)

As a woman who reads this sub, Im curious if now is the time to ask a question ive been pondering.

Does taking the red pill bring women in to your life who satisfy that deep inner yearning of attracting your beloved life partner?

Because what you described above is what Ive 'told the universe' that I want to attract... a man who lives that way and who can be man enough to say it.

I do agree it is attractive and something carnal is woken up inside me when a man holds his frame and takes the lead when the situation calls, but at the core of it all, I would still stay attracted to a man who showed me that when the time came, he was powerful, even if he was vulnerable when we shared our bed.

Does that make me some sort of Unicorn? I dont even know what that means. Arent we all looking for a unicorn of some sort? That person who you know exists because you feel them existing at your core. That person.

Don't most of us want someone who makes a decision to stay because they simply couldnt imagine their life with anyone else? Not because of money, or status or excessive perfection or stellar good looks or power or AMOG or whatever... but because that person gets you. She notices when your energy changes because you were disrespected and she listens to you share your darkest secret places and she cheerleads your victories and appreciates the effort put in to your defeats. She is respectful and appreciative, powerfully feminine yet delicate and capable of following your lead.

That is the woman I am.

Who will I attract? Should I change that because the men in this sub or the men elsewhere wouldnt like it?

Would I do best with an Alpha or a Beta? I read this sub and still have no idea.

[–]j0hnan0n 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Go ahead, Cypher. We won't miss you. You're free to swallow the blue pill and re-enter the matrix whenever you want.

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