Wanted to share a quick FR on something that happened last week. I was not going to post, but the sub is a little drama ridden lately, askMRP is in a mess so here goes. This is for newbies and should provide a relevant example.
I coach kids ball, if you know me you already know this. This requires communication with parents most of which are female, typically ED or E2D as I have ball 6 days a week. If you know me, you also know the running gag my wife likes to toss my way during this is "Which girlfriend are you talking to know?"
That's all the backstory, so let's get to the meat. My wife also like to text, specifically her mom. Text sessions can span hours to relay the same information a 5-minute phone call would accomplish, but they are women and we know how they communicate right?
The other night we are in bed around 8:30, she is still texting her mom, I am preparing to go lights out, so I tell the wife "to tell her boyfriend goodnight so we can go to bed."
Now my wife does not surprise me often, but she did when she rolled over, looked me in the eyes and says, "good night my boyfriend and husband" with a grin and smile. I was taken back for a second, but once I processed the info I quickly escalated to sex and that was it.
What does this mean for newbs? It means that even though my wife and I have been together since HS, late 30's, married 12 years with 2 kids, you still have to fill both roles to be successful in an LRT/marriage. You have to be her boyfriend and her husband. Alpha and Beta. Risk taking and stable. You have to stroke both sides of her hypergamous nature if you want to keep things exciting and fresh in your relationship and keep her eyes focused on you.
What is the other thing you need to be on the lookout for? How women initiate sex. My wives signs are the "fuck me now eyes" will snuggle up against me and cuddle and squeeze a little too hard, but she very rarely just goes directly for the junk like many guys expect a woman to. All she does is crack the door open a little and then wants me to open it up. Sure, she gives unsolicited BJ's and has stood against the wall and said, "fuck me now" but the 80% rule with my wife is contextual actions she does to show her desire for sex. So, you need to learn your womans tell tail signs and be on the lookout for them.
Stop going to the same place for dinner, and stop doing the same things over and over. You have to always be fresh, you always have to be escalating in everything you do. Make the plans, do what you want to do and do things that she enjoys and if you have kids it is even easier to do activity dates. It is very easy to get into the daily grind of life, but you have to try and push the boundaries. Ask for forgiveness, never permission, and for Pete's sake do not ask her what she wants to do. She doesn't know - that is your job. Just tell her to get in the car and start driving.
I am sure someone is going to say my comment was beta, or passive aggressive and that is fine. It is her running joke to me, and I tossed the shit test back to her and she handled like a pro, just like I do to her. It works in our relationship and with our specific details.
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