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For most of my marriage, I was the drunk captain of the ship. I found TRP, MRP, started lifting built my frame, but the hardest part FOR ME was understanding shit tests and how to handle them.

Now, keep in mind but I'm still learning, and with practice, I have been hitting these lobs out of the park.

When you really start nailing these shit tests, incredible things start happening: In my case, I find my wife initiates a lot more these days, especially around ovulation.

Her "No's" and excuses have nearly stopped entirely. And when she said no to me last week (through her body language, I don't verbally ask her haha), I responded by saying "Alright babe, but you're gonna have a boner poking you all night". Five minutes later, she's rubbing my hands under the pillow and dragging her feet up and down my leg, her typical signal.

The next day her mother was over at our place to meet her friend. Her friend cuts hair, and meeting at our place was a halfway point for them.

So, I'm watching football, and all 3 of these women start chatting, haircutter tells this story of her beta husband, gambling away settlement money, drinking and smoking all day (this is a man in his 50s btw), and finally kicking him out.

The conversation progresses and eventually they are discussing our pets. Wife talks about how it's a pain to deal with the animals.

Haircutter: "Why?"

Wife: "...because I am not the one in charge around here"

Excuse me? Did I hear that correctly?

At this point, some sick part of me, some disgusting, lingering beta part of me almost spews out some bullshit. I was almost about to say "Oh we're both in charge around here. The bird just doesn't like you and the dog is hyper"

But I chose to use this situation to further solidify my frame. I was already in the kitchen getting some cheese so I approached my wife with slight grin, smacked her ass gently and said, "That's right baby."

They all chuckled, her mom more so in disbelief that I said this (I fully believe her mom has no respect for men) but the haircutter friend says "I wish I could have said that about _____" (I can't remember what dudes name was...)

Remember to build and always maintain your frame. You never know when or if that blue pill nonsense is going to just spew out of your own mouth. I almost blew it right there and instead I paused, and seized the opportunity to solidify my position as the alpha in the family.

TL; DR : After almost of year of building frame, passing shit tests, and righting my ship, my wife openly admits to her mom and her mom's friend that I am in charge in this household, and then I capitalized on the opportunity.

Edit: I fucked up my title... can't change it...


[–]BluepillProfessorMarried-MRP MODERATOR16 points17 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

I like your title.

Your wife realized she was in your frame and that YOU are in charge right before that moment when she relaxed and started to purr in contentment. Only after she gets that feeling will she admit it to her family.

TLDR: Women are most happy when they are not in charge and can submit to a high value man.

[–]bogeyd6MRP MODERATOR1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

No mention of the tingles the hairdresser surely got.

[–]UEMcGillMarried- MRP MODERATOR5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

My "aha!" moment was when my wife said very non-nonchalantly, "I know you like things more traditional". She came over and gave me a peck on the cheek, a quick nuzzle and flipped her hair.

This was in response to her going on about some girlfriend of hers having problems fighting with her man and how they always butted heads. She basically was telling me if this girl just let her hubby lead it would be easier.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Frame is key, the most important part of this post which may go unnoticed is how your wife was comfortable enough not only submitting, but sharing her submission to others.

Society has taught women that submission is wrong and that marriage is a 50/50 split.

your wife went against these societal pressures and owner her shit, she did this because you ownedyour shit.

Masculinity begets femininity - well done. You've forged your role and now your wife is able to find her's.

[–]MRPguyMarried4 points5 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

Good report. My wife has the same sign; rubbing her feet up and down my legs.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

I may have been missing this.

Usually she is just cold so I roll with that.

[–]alphabeta49MRP APPROVED0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy Link

Yeah, I'm gonna have to start paying more attention. I usually like her to be more overt, but that just means that my head is up my own ass sometimes. Gotta stay on top of the nuance and hints.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

same night as I wrote that I was missing things...

she is hugging on me in bed watching tv....

so I got curious... sure enough, her holding my shoulder and bicep telling me that its gotten huge lately was her initiating...

Dad did not teach me this...

[–]alphabeta49MRP APPROVED0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

No shit. Haha. I'm gonna see if she drops any more obvious hints. She's just past ovulation, shouldn't be too hard to catch. I'm gonna start paying more attention.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

problem was, I was tired, didnt really feel like putting in the effort... but hey, dickboy was up for it, and I figured, what the hell, I can sleep when I am dead

[–]alphabeta49MRP APPROVED1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Here here.

[–]rpredneck1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

+1 same with my SO, sometimes I wonder if she even realizes she's doing it

[–]m23brandon1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Great work.

[–]bogeyd6MRP MODERATOR1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

I never got other a spoken moment it was more of a she just stopped making the decisions and I gradually took them over one by one. She likes it and while I won't go into great detail she has told me she likes being able to focus on her stuff now.

[–]sunthas0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy Link

My wife's stuff seems to be watching real housewives and other nonsense. ugh.

[–]bogeyd6MRP MODERATOR0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy Link

Mine too. Addicted to reality tv at the moment. She still does stuff so I won't not pick her too poorly.

[–]sunthas0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

I was planning on killing cable as soon as football finishes for the season. Save money, encourage stuff maybe.

[–]bogeyd6MRP MODERATOR0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Professionally and personally I've found that giving only one option is the wrong way to encourage. The proper path is to lead them to something else. Keeping in mind she gets her personal time just like you get yours. If everything else is satisfactory now is not the time to improve.

[–]sunthas0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

We had it off in august, was nice. This will more permanent. Discussed it with her, minimal objections. We still have Amazon, Hulu, and will probably add Netflix. Discussed putting the money in the travel fund.

I didn't explain my other motives, like getting reality shows off my TV.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Wrong approach.

it is not carrot or stick...

It is encouraging creation of carrots.

[–]coolasice0071 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

At this point, some sick part of me, some disgusting, lingering beta part of me almost spews out some bullshit. I was almost about to say "Oh we're both in charge around here. The bird just doesn't like you and the dog is hyper"

But I chose to use this situation to further solidify my frame. I was already in the kitchen getting some cheese so I approached my wife with slight grin, smacked her ass gently and said, "That's right baby." Nice..real nice

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

female virtue signaling working for you.

Totally not sure how it relates to pets.

[–]red_blue_and_hot0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

The pets were just the drama du jour.

Now, if you're not sure how female virtue signaling relates to drama, I can't help you, son.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I can't help you, son.

sigh. its not the 90's and I doubt you are 16.

Also, you missed a possible turn of concept that is available in this narrative. but since I wasn't there, I won't mention more.

[–]BobbyPeruMRP Approved0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

It's great when you start to go through soft no's like butter.

The public acknowledgment was even bigger though.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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