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"You don't know how badly I needed that." (self.marriedredpill)

submitted by JonnyJaded

Some of the comments in my last post got me thinking; I can do more to lead my wife through this difficult time in her life. I just needed a little jump start to pull my head out of my ass (we've all been there). So I went to where I always go when I need a good kick in the sack, right here.

Main body: Wife had planned to take the boys to some festival around here to get them out of the house. As she was telling me about it we both realized that it was going to be the same shit that every festival has. And that it would have been lame. Through research I found that the winery my inlaws work at were having some Kentucky Derby party. I ask them where to buy the tickets and tell them not to tell her about it. Saturday morning I get home very early from the bar (I usually have afew beers with the DJ and the other bouncers after work) so I can wake up and surprise her. Perfect timing, I wake up just as she is struggling with toddler to get him dressed. I swoop in, give her a kiss on the cheek. "Change of plans, babe. You dress the little one, I'll dress the big one. Get out of the mom jeans, and put on a dress. Daddy's got a plan." She kept up with the "No. We were looking forward to this." "Where are we going?" "What are we doing?" "What plan?" stuff. I was ready for her. Most questions were laughed off (I noticed that she didn't stop looking for a dress/changing/putting on makeup as she was asking them) and took it for the test it was. Acta Non Verba. After maybe the 10th question I walked into the bathroom, pushed her against the door and kissed her hard, smacked her ass and told her to stop worrying, I got it handled. She does, we leave. We arrive, I present the tickets, get our shit and continue. Now she is shit testing about what the kids are gonna do. No problem. "It's handled. Have some wine. Check out the horses. Me and toddler are gonna disappear for while." Every 30 minutes or so I come over to her and check on the baby, which is asleep and refill her wine glass. We eat, she is smiling. She watches me play with the kid. She watches the kid play with other kids. She smiles.

Finally the toddler is tired of being there so we drive home. On the way home she says "Thank you, babe. You don't know how badly I needed that." Me: WINK "Yeah I did."

Both kids fall asleep, but I have to get ready for work. She wants needs to fuck. I push her head down as I call work and explain that I'll be late. Rip her panties off, pick her up, and do her caveman style against the bathroom door. Then I give her a peck on the cheek, a swat on the ass, and I'm off to work. Got a SMS of her tits on the way to work with a note "I guess I needed that pretty badly too XOXO."

Yes you did babe, yes you did.

Lessons Learned: You can always do more, be better, lead more effectively, it's not good enough to say "I handled shit pretty good a month ago, I'll be set for awhile." It doesn't work that way. You must constantly and consistently improve. And when you fuck up, you have to realize it, own it, and fix it.

Stay manly, gents.


[–]privilegechecked8516 points17 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Well done. high five

Took me a while to stop asking 'what would you like to do' and replace it with, 'this is what we are doing, wear this, and be ready at this time'. Both of us are so much happier.

[–]MRPguy 15 points15 points [recovered] | Copy Link

Took me a while to stop asking 'what would you like to do'

Women don't want to make decisions. They will make them if pressed (or if their husband is an awkward fuck with no capacity for leading) but will despise the entire process and often sabotage everything with the decision they've made.

[–]JonnyJadedUnplugging[S] 4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

So true. I've been there.

[–]maxofreddit6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I surprised my wife one day when I suggested in a group conversation that at the end of the day she has "decision fatigue." The ladies may not readily admit to wanting us to make all the calls, but they'll agree that they're tired & worn out at the end of the day. When I used the term, she looked at me with surprise & said essentially, "Yes, that's exactly what it is!"

For me, it's no big deal to look into the cupboard, see what we have, & make dinner. For her, it's an entire ordeal. If, however, we plan the week out, & she knows ahead of time what's for dinner, no ordeal. Your actually helping her brain not be tired by making the call for her.

Dude...totally helped me to realize that she's just not built to make the decisions.

I too, give you high fives for a day in full on leadership mode.

[–]SexistFlyingPig3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This was the HARDEST change for me to make moving on from my divorce. I was such the supplicating beta, "What would you like to do? What are you in the mood for? What can I do to help?" Now I make statements or ask for specific factual information. "When are you finished with your obligations tonight? Great. I'll pick you up 30 minutes after that. Wear something nice."

Guess which approach gets her panties wet?

[–]BluepillProfessorMarried-MRP MODERATOR8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Change of plans, babe. You dress the little one, I'll dress the big one. Get out of the mom jeans, and put on a dress. Daddy's got a plan." She kept up with the "No. We were looking forward to this." "Where are we going?" "What are we doing?" "What plan?"

After maybe the 10th question I walked into the bathroom, pushed her against the door and kissed her hard, smacked her ass and told her to stop worrying, I got it handled.

Way to handle yourself and your shit testing woman. Bro-pat.

Women LOVE a man with a plan fellows. What is YOUR plan for the day/week/month/year?

[–]Redneck001MRP APPROVED6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Stay manly, gents.

Good to you again around these parts.

Nice FR.

[–]JonnyJadedUnplugging[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thanks bro. It's good to be back.

[–]TheGrayRapp_3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Its funny how a simple set of leadership tasks can change the situation. Obviously they wont come out and say it, but that fuck and the picture after was a direct result of you controlling the situation. Some on here would look at it as some crazy proof that women are this or that, or people that hate this place would look at it as some controlling sexist thing. The reality is she needed guidance like most people do with kids, etc, and you gave it to her. Confirming why she is with you.

Women want to date men, not beta type losers that bend to anything she says. Its that simple. What is the point of her being with someone that says or does everything she says? Think about it, there is no actual reason to be with someone that doesnt push you out of your boundaries or take some control. This shit is more then RP and PUA tactics, its simple reality with a bit of psych.

Glad it worked out for you.

[–]SexistFlyingPig0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

And this is exactly what she wants. She wants you to lead. She wants to follow. She doesn't want to have to worry about all the details of the plan. She just wants to follow the plan.

Great field report.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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