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Just a fr here. It's been 19 days since the last time i deered. I've added 15 lbs to all my lifts and continued 3x a week lifting heavy. Gained 2 lbs and haven't been shot down since. Started preping to apply for a wireman apprentice program to get out of warehouse slave labor. Read Epictetus and halfway through Pook.

Came home from work yesterday to hear the wife has started pms a few days early this cycle. Raging to the kids about a mess they made. I don't acknolwedge her while i go start dinner and she never comes to me to get attention which is unusual.

I play with the kids and make them clean up the 200ish books they put on the living room floor while i finished dinner. Wife goes on screaming to them in the other room trying to get a rise outta me. I keep my cool and eat dinner with the kids while she finger fucks her phone on the couch.

I realize I made this harpy cunt and she seems to have the worst pms I've seen her ever have right now. Is this due to the improvements ive made in recent weeks?

After the kids went to bed she told me no one listens to her in the house and I just said well i can't speak for the kids but i know i dont want to listen to fuck 4 times in every sentance while someones screaming. Then i walked off and read my book while she watched Netflix on her phone in our bed.

I feel like i need to set a boundary about how she talks to the kids. She asked the 7 yr old why she was such a fucking idiot for not picking up her boots off the kitchen floor when she was told.

Wife was practically dragging the 2 yr old to the bathroom to brush his teeth by his wrist. At which point I grabbed her wrist only hard enough to take the pressure off his. She said dont fucking touch me and I said don't touch our son like that. I told her nursemaids elbow doesn't feel good.

My main question is will my wife stop being this way over time as i improve myself? It seems to be getting worse at this point.


[–]Red_Ninja716 points17 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Start video taping this verbal abuse of the kids when you can. May come in handy during the divorce.

[–]InChargeManRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Definitely this. For now she should be on the same footing as a suspect in-home nanny. I'd have nanny-cams running both for the kids safety as well as documentation for custody in the divorce.

OP, this is NOT acceptable behavior in any way. There is zero excuse for behavior like this. I'm wondering where she gets it from? Probably you are to blame.

[–]Redpillbrigade171 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Rather research the laws in your state if you can actually use that as evidence. Unless you have consent you may not.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red27 points28 points  (20 children) | Copy Link

I have ZERO fucking tolerance to any physical altercations from parents to kids other than a deliberate spanking. Dragging by the arm? Nope.

I have ZERO fucking tolerance to any verbal abuse from adult to child. “Fucking idiot” certainly applies.

You man enough to get 2” from your wives face and let her know who the fucking man is?

You prepared to protect your kids from any threat? Her included?

No one fucks with my kids.

PMS is just bullshit.

[–]gameoflibidos10 points11 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I agree.

No tolerance for this sort of behavior.

First step ... is calmly but firmly say "Go take a break. I'll put the kids to bed" if she gives you any flack/doesn't listen... more sternly "Go take a fucking break NOW. I'll put the kids to bed" if she still doesn't listen and goes into tazmanian devil mode.. you simply ignore her, pack up the kids in the car and leave.

The 7 year old is old enough to describe to anyone who questions your actions what happened.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

more sternly "Go take a fucking break NOW. I'll put the kids to bed"

more sternly "I was not asking."

[–]juliusstreicher0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I say to calm down on all of the "stern" stuff. She's stressed, and being challenged/confronted doesn't usually help.

Put arm around waist or give a hug, and say "You heard me. Git!"

[–]hystericalbonding6 points7 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

You man enough to get 2” from your wives face and let her know who the fucking man is?

I like a lot of your posts, but this is fucking retarded.

[–]screechhaterRed Beret4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

I don’t think so.

He is their father.

If she is being abusive she is breaking their trust.

He needs to wake her the fuck up.

[–]hystericalbonding2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I prefer employing basic psychology and leading by example. Both better long-term strategies than losing my cool and resorting to intimidation.

[–]screechhaterRed Beret5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Oh for fucks sakes. If one is lifting and just raises the voice slightly in the face,the vvalue is taken as a boundary permanently.

I married quality and have never had to deal with this shit.

I have had to warn a brother in law once.

It’s just a face to face boundary. It’s not intimidation by repeatedly bullying

[–]hystericalbonding3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It’s just a face to face boundary

2" from the face from a guy who lifts is not "just a boundary." It reads like the DV hamster in action, or more likely sfplus trying to sound like a badass. Idiots will take it literally.

It’s not intimidation by repeatedly bullying

Who said anything about doing it more than once?

I married quality

Mine wasn't quite as bad as OP, but now she's fantastic. She's reading a third parenting book right now. Keeps her cool when the kids have tantrums. Creative with the kids. We use almost purely positive psychology and modeling desired behavior with them at this point. No more body triangles like weakandsensitive. The only time outs are self-imposed.

[–]Fritz_Frauenraub4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

OP isn't anywhere near having the frame to pull off the R Lee Ermey "getting 2" from his wife's face" thing.

Any female worth her salt will flip that on a beta so fast it will make his head spin & next thing he's neck deep in her frame being accused of abusive behavior.

Take control of the situation, remove kids from harms way, set boundaries etc but keep a grip on yourself OP.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I literally checked on the kids after she left their room from tucking them in bed. Had to make sure she didnt strangle them. She sounds better from texts today but I cant help but think of shutter island.

[–]470_2_700_nm3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I like how you bury your worry that this may turn fatal after your OP above.

Your post title should include this you fucking pussy. These are your children.

Repost the fucking question “I’m concerned my wife is dangerous to my children”.

You’ve got all sorts of guys jerking each other off over if it’s ok to spank, when the real question isn’t any of that.

Your a fucking pussy if you don’t repost this question. A big fucking pussy. Right now you make me sick. Fuck you. This is the title you should have posted: You are getting to the point where you think your wife is dangerous.

Pussy.

[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando3 points4 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

What's the difference between dragging a child by the arm and a deliberate spanking? Both of them result in the same thing - the child being hurt physically. Is a deliberate spanking better because it's thought out and planned rather than losing the head and striking out? I'd say it's less excusable for the same reason.

Kids don't need to be spanked to be disciplined. It might work but it's fucking lazy and an abuse of power.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

If you cant see that a spank is done from a position of power, and dragging someone across the room by pulling them is not...

I have nothing for you.

[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I've never spanked my kids. I rarely even raise my voice at them. And yet they are both well mannered, polite and respectful.

There is certainly a difference between spanking and dragging a child across a room - I can see that clearly. I just don't believe that either is necessary.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I have had to spank my kids no more than 5 times each in their lives. So that is maybe once every two years...

[–]fuckmrpRed Beret3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Nope both are forced compliance via violence. Think about it like this, are you raising children or adults?

[–]screechhaterRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Spanking is not the punishment.

It’s the attention garner Then you punish

[–]BobbyPeruRed Beret1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

PMS is just bullshit

End thread

[–]screechhaterRed Beret2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Ain’t no shit.

Rock. Solid. Frame.

[–]BobbyPeruRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

+1.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Dude, it’s one thing for your wife to swear at you, you’re a man and you can take it. It’s a different ball park when she is swearing at your toddlers. I’m 26 and I do not have kids. I do not know what it’s like to be in your shoes but we both know what your wife is doing isn’t acceptable. You’ve got to lay down the law and let her know that it is unacceptable to speak to the kids like that.

My advice that I think I picked up from listening to the guys here is to get your kids on your side. If she is belittling your kids you need to treat them 10X better so that when mommy cuntasarous tries to file for divorce and steal your kids away they say that they want to move in with daddy because he treats us right. Use this as leverage but damn dude put her ass in place. She is creatiing nothing but future psychological problems for your children.

[–]screechhaterRed Beret7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

She’s an immature cunt. AKA a narcissistic bitch.

You ain’t seen nothing until the daughter starts getting the IO s

Draw some boundaries. Set up some nannny cams.

Keep improving. Nursemaids elbow or hits happen and DFS will be called to the hospital. Get your fucking proof now.

Draw some boundaries. PMS is no excuse.

You had better start protecting those kids if she is being abusive. Verbally or physically. You are their only hope right now.

do not fuck around

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

After the kids went to bed she told me no one listens to her in the house

Translation: "My usual methods of manipulating you aren't working anymore."

But neither an overactive hamster nor PMS make it acceptable for her to treat the kids that way. She's gone well beyond discipline and is approaching flat out abuse.

[–]hystericalbonding3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

From /u/2ndal: tracking cycles Read the comments.

From [deleted]: The old trope is that women want more comfort during PMS. That's bullshit. They need you to be a rock. More alpha.

If she has PMDD, then she needs sleep, exercise, and possibly meds.

Both of you need to model the behavior you want from the kids, both to them and in front of them. Just telling your kids what to do is short-sighted. Enforcing your perspective with superior strength or stronger emotion can sometimes achieve a short-term goal, but fucks things up in the long-term. A sensible parent wants their kids to be intrinsically motivated.

[–]mitch2you802 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Op, this advice is Rock solid. If it's a frame issue, be the rock. If it's PMDD, get her on meds.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Right on with the sleep. When I got home last night she met me at the door like a dog with it's head down tail between legs. Gave me a big hug and was night and dat different. She only had 3 hrs of sleep the night before and told me she just needed more sleep. Almost felt like bipolar the way she had switched off and on. On a side note she actually got on her knees and sucked the dick last night out of nowhere. I think she knows she fucked up though.

[–]2ndalRed Beret3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

This is not PMS, this is abuse.

[–]badthrowawaynames2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I’m a woman, I get moody during PMS, but there is no fucking way I would ever treat my husband or kids this way. It doesn’t take much maturity to look your husband in the eye, say I’ve had too much today, and ask for a break to recollect yourself. Stand up for yourself and more importantly your children,

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

She told me a break would of been nice. I was too busy implementing withdrawal attention and stfu from her to realize. Almost as if she just wanted me to just get it. Busy dealing with a monster to read it's mind.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Just pointing out that she told me the day after not that night.

[–]Red-Nerd134 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Set up some hidden cameras to catch this in action. This is borderline abuse, verbally & physically. Your kids are literally defenseless and you need to protect them. From their own mother if necessary. When she is yelling & swearing at the kids, you need to step in. Show your kids what a man is supposed to do.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Back in the day anytime I'd intervene she would end up making me deer about having the nerve to criticize her parenting. Will be interesting to see how it plays out now that i have some insight with rp.

[–]Red-Nerd132 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Get back to intervening with your new foundation. You need to show your kids, your wife, and yourself who is in charge & what a man's responsibility is. You are the protector of your household, from both outside & inside threats.

I'd strongly recommend hidden cameras to capture what's going on when you're not there, & just in case you ever have to physically remove her or the kids from the situation.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

> I realize I made this harpy cunt

.. out of the ingredients that were already in her. You take a lot of accountability for this, and that's great and fundamental to OYS and MRP and yadda yadda. But there's also the possibility that your wife is a miserable piece of shit who never should have been allowed to breed in the first place. Physical abuse towards her own children and an inability to manager her own temper make me think that's a strong possibility, but that's just me. But she might come around eventually. Hard to know.

My ex wife used to treat my kids this way when she got angry. Kids (college aged) are both in therapy for it now and have a lot of mental damage from it. Go figure. I agree with u/red-sfpplus the kid abuse needs to stop. Make sure you get a few recordings of her swearing and stuff for backup in case things go south and you need it for legal protection if she calls the cops on your for DV if you ever need to physically restrain her, or during the custody hearings if that happens.

NMMNG says that the process of fixing yourself will either fix your relationship, or lead to the death of a terminally doomed one. What's happening now sounds like you're approaching a climax due to her reacting to your changes. Which way things go once the climax is reached... who knows.

[–]Cam_Winston211 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I didn't know PMS stood for Low Quality Woman.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Swearing at the kids is shite, and not ok. Good luck man.

[–]ReddJiveRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

My main question is will my wife stop being this way over time as i improve myself?

No. She's this way because you allow her to be. She's the oldest teen in the house. There is no excuse for her to be yelling. She's an adult. She should be modeling more self control.

[–]MrChad_ThundercockBig Red Machine1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

“Is this due to the improvements ive made in recent weeks?”

Yes. Probably part of it. Will get worse before it gets better.

Are you tracking her cycle?

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Are you tracking her cycle?

Really?

OP is a faggot. I didnt even bother to call him out on his lack of leadership.

He had 5 opportunities that I can count to take control. From the books being picked up, to the wife yelling.

He sat there, and was a passive little faggot.

I only called out what I did because physical and verbal abuse to children is ZERO tolerance for me.

And you are going to give the wife and out due to her fucking PMS?

One of the biggest mistakes I made during my "marriage" at the end was tracking her cycle. Fuck that. I dont track my girlfriends cycle and she is:

1) Always happy

2) Always DTF

Tracking a woman's cycle for other than vacation purposes is living in her frame.

I used to think like this, when I had a bitch around.

The whole tracking her cycle thing needs to fucking die around here.

[–]MrChad_ThundercockBig Red Machine3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You right about his leadership.

Tracking helped me in the beginning - as I was learning and I fucking myself. - bought me some time & was able to minimize the downhill spiral of doom (where shits gets progressively worse as the evening goes on) and all of a sudden the unpredictable became predictable. Was able to head off situtations before they happened.

Like counting cards, you’re really only adding plus / minus ones to get a running count, not memorizing anything, but it does give you ratio of high cards versus low cards left in the deck and you maximize your gains or minimize your loses by betting accordingly. No guarantees though because casinos don’t play to the end of the shoe (anymore). But if you do it correctly, can level the house edge over the long game...

But of course, it’s all bullshit once you become the prize and are owning your shit. Who gives a fuck about a little girls period.

I think it’s helpful for newbs. I was asking him if he does it- it might be a helpful tool for the time being..at least until he becomes a leader.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes my passiveness is my biggest beta trait I'm working on. At a family get together back in bp days my sil yelled at her kids while swearing in front of the whole family. My brother her husband myself and my dad all stood there and didn't intervene. I grew up with a father who literally was as bad as Upham on saving private ryan. He listened to the world kill his sons in the other room and peed his pants on the stairwell. Regardless I won't give up until i become the man who goes in and kills that krout without hesitation.

[–]The_LitzRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah, tracking her cycles became just another covert contract. She is ovulating therfore I am entitled to hot sex while being a low value chump that does not get her panties wet.

If you don't know your arse from your elbow there is some use to it, but just to get you to understand how you got laid in the past. Moving forward it should just drop away like that little piece of umbilical cord on a babies belly button.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes she was on day 19 of the cycle. Normally pms hits on days 25-28 with a day or 2 of normal before bleeding hits.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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