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I just found MRP very recently and started reading NMMNG yesterday. I find he talks a lot about accepting yourself "just the way you are". Not focusing on your hair, clothes, physique, etc to define your worth. However, much of the advice I'm seeing in the basic RP info is about grooming, style/fashion, exercising. So when we are doing these things to raise our SMV, does this not conflict with the idea of not doing these things for external validation? Isn't SMV basically related to how others perceive you. Or am I completely misinterpreting this?

Please note, I definitely see the value in doing all of these things for ourselves. I'm just a bit mixed up with SMV vs external validation.


[–]2ndalRed Beret12 points13 points  (12 children) | Copy Link

You do those things because you care about your appearance, not because you get your self worth and validation from the reaction others give you (or don't) because of your appearance.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

nonsense

[–]Fritz_Frauenraub6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Less time spinning your wheels over dumbass MRP paradoxes and more time lifting and improving yourself

[–]suprathepeg2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

One of the hardest concepts to openly admit to yourself is that you need to put yourself first. Develop yourself first. Care for yourself first. Lead yourself first.

I think a better way of looking at it is you take a mental picture of your picture of yourself if you could do and be your own ideal. Then work backward from there. Develop goals, plans to meet those goals and act it all out.

When you do that you don’t imagine yourself fat, lonely and unfulfilled do you?

[–]Rian_StoneMod / Red Beret1 point2 points  (10 children) | Copy Link

when you get another cert for higher pay at work, are you doing it for your boss validation, or for better job prospects?

[–]DeplorableRay1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

There is a difference between accepting yourself, and others accepting you. You can not like yourself and guarantee others won’t, or you can like yourself and hope others do. Hoping others do is a bad strategy. You have to like yourself, and you need a strategy for others to like you. The idea of RP is to give you the tool box for improving both. NMMNG is about accepting yourself internally. While material referring to dread is about how people view you externally.

A lot of the material is about personal growth and cover both internal acceptance and external acceptance. But they aren’t the same thing.

[–]youcantdenythat0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

What about self validation?

Don't you want to be nice to yourself? NMMNG is abou others.

Do you want people to be nice to you?

What do you want to see when you look in the mirror? A dirty fat guy? A lazy good-for-nothing?

Raising your smv isn't about others, it's about you. It's about growing up and becoming a mature man. For you.

It will give you opportunities that you never had before. Other people will respect you more and will tend to defer to your judgement and help you get what you want.

You're not improving because you want others validation. You're doing it because you recognize all of the other benefits that a high smv man has that you won't.

[–]RealityTastesGreat0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Its not what you do but why you do it

[–]MrChad_ThundercockChief Autist in Charge0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Don’t get stuck on stupid.

Get to work faggot.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Accepting yourself is not the same as being content with your life. Seeing flaws that can be improved is not the same as denigrating yourself for having them. Also, who the fuck cares what some book said. Do you believe in everything you read? This isn't science and there no rules. Just some words of wisdom some people share to point the way. You still have to carve your own path to get there.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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