She's shit testing me right out the door.

Persaeus · 2017-09-28T16:31:53+00:00

My wife shit tests me NEVER.

I come and go as I please. I spend money freely. We have sex regularly.

Yeah, yeah, I know... She's not special and I don't have a unicorn. And AWALT is only a heuristic, right until I say my wife isn't like AWALT. Then suddenly it's bullet proof rationale that never fails.

Point is, there are women out there that don't shit test you every minute of the day. Sometimes a woman is just a cunt.

man_in_the_world · 2017-09-28T17:58:36+00:00

I reviewed your post history.

Let me be honest ... you still suck. Your frame is shit; you have a big, fragile ego that's a gigantic, inviting target; you don't fully own your shit; you're an unemployed slacker. You just suck.

Maybe your woman sucks, too. Some do. But much more likely, she's just reflecting you.

You posted this looking for us to give you excuses to blame her rather than yourself. No. Quit looking for excuses and blaming others; that's why you still suck. Get to work, own your shit, and fix yourself.

Once you know what not being a piece of shit looks and feels like, you'll be able to evaluate yourself whether she's capable of responding in kind. But not before.

blarggggggggggg · 2017-09-28T17:22:02+00:00

I get where you're coming from but you're asking the wrong question 'is it ever her fault'.

The right question is, 'am I doing 100% of what I can to fix my shit and this relationship'? Lifting, making the effort to pass the shit tests, owning your shit and responsibilities around the house, building and holding frame, kill covert contracts, sidebar, etc, etc.

Only when the answer to that question is 'yes' can you begin to decide if she is worth dealing with anymore, or if she will never change her own view of you due to your excessive negative past.

I don't know how long you have been in the relationship but you probably could use at least a year to build yourself up.

[deleted] · 2017-09-28T16:37:45+00:00

Examples of constant shit tests please

Westernhagen · 2017-09-28T16:46:43+00:00

The other end of the spectrum is, she never shit tests you because she just doesn't care and has totally checked out. So there's that.

SteelToeShitKicker · 2017-09-28T16:47:35+00:00

5 pages of comment history, zero mentions of lifting.

You fail at MRP. Restart, sidebar is on the right.

RedishPill · 2017-09-28T17:04:55+00:00

bla bla bla

what do you want?

and do you think the next one will be different for you?

Leadralan · 2017-09-28T16:37:34+00:00

My replies to shit test come off effortlessly and I take it as amusing banter. I laugh in her face and game the shit out of that woman. Gotta fuck her properly later.

Chinchilla_the_Hun · 2017-09-28T16:53:00+00:00

Look at it in financal terms. She made am investment of commitment in you. (You did the same with her, but let's ignore that part of the equation/analogy) Your negative behaviors were like massively compounding debt that accumulated over years and you've been putting off payments until recently. The monthly invoices turned into thrice-daily (or more) harassing calls. Now that you're finally owning up to the responsibility of payments, you're upset that you're receiving these reminders and want them to stop.

My guess is that - in her mind - you haven't paid off enough of the debt to warrant a reduction in the frequency of reminders that you're in poor standing; this is all regardless of how you feel. My advice for the short term is to adjust your attitude towards the process and ramp up your self improvements when possible.

ReddJive · 2017-09-28T17:11:19+00:00

Two words

Cognitive Dissonance.

BobbyPeru · 2017-09-28T17:38:23+00:00

Depends. You didn't give s time frame of when you took the RP or if you read the sidebar.

My gut tells me you need to give it more time. You came from a very beta place, so of course she's going to shit test the fuck out of you. She's having a hard time believing your changes, and on some level she's right, because internally you are in turmoil.

What I used to do early on is just leave... Not to punish her, but to take some take and get my internal frame back. I think you might be in the anger phase.

Ok, onto your question- some chicks are just plain bitchy and you need to leave those. I don't think you're far enough along to make that determination yet though.

RedishPill · 2017-09-28T17:04:32+00:00

Only way to know is to:

Up your SMV% to the point where you are fighting off other offers with baseball bat (or not) and see how she acts.

Where are you at in the looks, style, career and NGAF department? Why are you still sitting there after a minute or two of her running at the mouth?

Hint: if her shit testing is making you MAD, then you're out of your frame , hoss. Time for OI

If it's disappointing, well you have the right attitude but she doesn't see it yet. Time for OI

If it's cute to you and steerable, you're in the zone.

[EDIT] and just a reminder the rule of thumb is (results may vary) it takes at least a month for every year to turn your ship around. And that's if you're doing everything correctly with no set backs.

straius · 2017-09-28T17:15:41+00:00

Gotta give examples of the never ending shit tests or nobody's gonna know which way your problem's swinging.

markpf73 · 2017-09-28T17:49:58+00:00

So your 6 months in based on your Reddit age - time spent lurking under a different user name doesn't count.

You can either beta out and quit - have fun MGTOWing.

Or you can alpha up. I'll allow you this victim puke this once on your marathon run that is your red pill journey. Take a quick swig of water, wash the smell of puke off your chin, and keep running like a Clydesdale (slow, hard working, and grinding without much finesse)

[deleted] · 2017-09-28T18:42:56+00:00

The problem is, I'm getting really fucking tired of it. To the point that when it happens now, I just stare up at the ceiling while simultaneously clawing at my face and start listing off the pros and cons of being with her.

Your frame blows. That's why you get shit tested so much.

It is often said on here "Women will never stop shit testing", but is there a point when it moves from shit testing to "this twats broken"?

They're all broken. It's not a bug. It's a feature.

If you don't like this one, go pick a different pretty girl off of the pretty girl tree. There are plenty of them out there. Just realize that one is going to treat you like shit too until you solve this frame issue.

223552 · 2017-09-28T23:04:14+00:00

Until a week ago, I had same mentality as you, I thought, I improving here for 9 months, and nothing is working, must have just got unlucky with this particular woman. Over the weekend, I had a huge mindset shift, and finally saw, how over the years, of being weak beta, my wife developed resentment, anger, and frustration towards me. I can't change that now, I can however, work on me, which in time may create new attraction. Women don't forget anything.

Its quiet likely, that your GF is still acting the way she is, is because of your past. She is not acknowledging your new you yet. That is something that will take time.

BirdManBrrrr · 2017-09-29T14:44:32+00:00

You take her too seriously. Someone here once said "Someone else's opinion of you should not matter, especially hers" or something to that effect. This is part of the "You are your own judge" concept from WISNIFG, which you should read ---->

You care about what she says and you internalize it and here you are. Once you change the way you view her and view what comes out of her mouth you won't feel this massive frustration when she's shit testing constantly. Sure, maybe she's just a miserable cunt and she's programmed as such...but you have a lot of work to do before you can accurately discern between the two. At some point her nonsense should become amusing to you, even if shrill and bitchy. That's when you know you're making mental gainz.

Everyone else is correct on your OYS (or lack thereof), Frame (or lack thereof), sidebar(...), etc.

I wonder if she will never forget my past (even though she never brings it up in arguments or shit tests about it) and thus will never be comfortable looking to me as her oak.

In the middle of this myself and can relate. The only way to know for sure is to become fit and awesome, then you can see if she's worth keeping around or if its easier to start over. The stay plan is the go plan. Takes a lot of work to get there also.

She also doesn't consciously realize what's going on, or its highly unlikely she will; she won't wake up one day and tell you "Oh good job ReddishPill you used to be the biggest faggot now you're my big strong man omgggg". It will be totally feelz and if you change your behavior she may (or may not) change hers in response. Stay on your path for your own benefit and see how she reacts over time, how her behavior changes, etc.

Get to work.

Big_Daddy_PDX · 2017-10-01T00:48:38+00:00

When will you new its realize that Shit Tests are an invitation to play and have fun?

You sound very low value at the moment. Why would she want to stay with you? These are the shit tests that hurt the most; the ones that remind us of how much work we have to to before we can have fun.