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I am reading the rational male - Plate Theory and I am asking myself is a plate required?

My concerns is this: I don't want to cheat. I made the mental shift to be able to end the relationship.

As for now I do some reading and am not actively seeking for a plate or something, but I see my options grow every time I go to the gym. On the other hand - its week 3 and I am on level 1 in the dread game

Is having a plate the same as having orbiters for women or is a plate more?


[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Direct answer: A plate is more

Some fluff: Nobody is making you cheat, if by, "I see my options grow every time I go to the gym" you mean your body is looking better so you're feeling more confident thus you're raising your SMV = more options, yes.

If you mean that girls are looking at you in the gym and that means you have more options, no.

A girl looking at you does not = she wants to fuck. People look at each other all the time, don't be the guy who texts a chick & thinks he's spinning plates.

[–]number123356[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thanks I was on the wrong track than

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

You arent faithful if you have no option to fuck other women.

Until you have a real chance to f close a chick, telling yourself you wont cheat is bullshit. Because its not wont cheat, its cant cheat.

Luckily for you, lmr, burden of performance mean you can pull back at any time.

Girls loke fucking men that other girls want to fuck

[–]InChargeManRed Beret6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I refuse to let Scarlett Johansson have sex with me.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

you sir, need to show proof. lol

[–]LymanRP2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Until you have a real chance to f close a chick, telling yourself you wont cheat is bullshit. Because its not wont cheat, its cant cheat.

Very well said. It's easy to brag about being faithful when you haven't approached girls or had an option. It's a different thing to have options and turn them down.

[–]ForeplayOrFelony6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It's contextual.

 

Question: What is the problem with just having a conversation with strangers? Answer: Nothing. There are no problems.

 

Similarly, there is nothing wrong, as a married man, with talking to women who are not your wife or, even, flirting with other women.

 

I guarantee that your wife will entertain someone who is flirting with her. If she doesn't want to cheat, then she won't. The same applies to you: Just don't take any interaction beyond a point your comfortable with. If you don't want to cheat ... then don't cheat.

 

Don't overthink this or overcomplicate it.

 

Plate theory, for a married man, is nothing more than the active realization that YOU [The Prize] have options beyond your wife. And, should your marriage not work out - then you KNOW [OI/Abundance] you can exercise your options, at will.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

did some girl offer to fuck you and you said no?

Because unless that has actually happened, you had no choice about whether you were actually going to have a plate.

Hanging out with women is called having a social life. Having a social life does not mean having a sex life.

[–]ReddJiveRed Beret5 points6 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Don't want to cheat. LOL That's cute. I remember when I said that. I only had one real barrier and that got removed. Once that happened.....

This is amoral to be sure. No one will judge whether you do or do not cheat, what have you. We will judge how you go about it. we will judge if your frame is solid or not. Judge if you've really reclaimed your masculinity.

The first step this is to realize that the path you have chosen will go anywhere. That you can't just put limits on yourself and say, no...I won't do that.

Because you may very well find your mission lies elsewhere. To get there you direction may be different. Once you realize there are people worth your time and those that are not, you will be a better man. This includes you wife. She may very well end up being a person who no longer deserves your time. Even now I am removing people I have know for years. Hobbies that I have done for over a decade. Why? They are of no real value. They were escapes. Nothing more. They neither fulfilled me nor enriched me. Time sinks. Nothing more.

What I smell here is honor, duty, and that idea of "keeping your word". Look. I get it. I played those games where all those great manly traits were extolled but let me tell you. There is not shortage of people willing to abuse you good will, generosity, and depth of energy for their own purposes. there is only one way to combat this.

There are a lot more things I could throw in here that I have learned. But not now. Build your frame and above all else stop putting limits on yourself.

Follow the process. It works. You will come out a better man.

[–]resolutions3160 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

I'm curious - what was the thing that changed your mind?

[–]ReddJiveRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

About having an affair?

I have no idea how I can condense into one post on the decision process for this.

The simple fact is my frame is solid and still improving. I don't look back. I don't root through the garbage.

She can come or go. My direction is forward.

[–]FailingBillionaire-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

People think it's one way. But it's the other way.

[–]ReddJiveRed Beret4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

if you can't say no to it. You are a slave to it.

[–]donedreadpirateRed Beret1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

I don't think it's bad that you're inquisitive and asking so many questions. Some people learn that way, but I promise you will learn more by reading and application. I think you could say that plates are the male equivalent of beta orbiters. Does it matter? You're 3 weeks in, I don't think you should be worried about spinning plates in your marriage right now.

[–]number123356[S] 4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

It came up with the readings and I was asking myself what is a plate in context of a marriage

[–]UEMcGillI am become McGill, Destroyer of Blue Pill2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

A plate in the context of marriage is still a plate. Redpill is amoral.

Your goal is to maximize sexual access, aka rule zero. In marriedredpill that rule is still paramount. You just have the added complexity of a committed relationship. The default commitment is monogamous sexual access.

Some people reassess and reframe the context; they say "Well, I'm no longer going to be sexually exclusive because she is no longer easily available" or even "I'm no longer a proponent of me being sexually exclusive". They could spin plates, have one night stands, or even a secondary LTR. It's simply living by rule zero. Based on most peoples judgement of standard marriage it's a dick move no doubt, but that's not why we're here.

Ultimately you need to get to a point where you can choose without anguish which path to proceed down. I'm happy with my wife, she brings value to my life that investing in another woman would take considerable effort to reproduce. I don't hold any illusions that she can't be replaced though, and if she were to eliminate sexual access tomorrow, it would be an easy decision for me to next her and find a woman who is willing to grant that.

[–]donedreadpirateRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

k

[–]chachaChad1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

On the other hand - its week 3 and I am on level 1 in the dread game

Now is good time to take things slow and work on yourself. If you don't want to cheat, then don't cheat. Work on yourself and figure out your mission. If it includes your wife, fine. If it doesn't then fine.

Plates are not required. Be sure you're not using plates as external validation. as well. Your validation should be coming from within yourself, not from someone else.

[–]screechhaterRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

"Until you have a real chance to f close a chick, telling yourself you wont cheat is bullshit. Because its not wont cheat, its cant cheat."

OP this says it all right here above

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

A plate is a women your are with for sex only.

One plate is not a plate, it's a relationship/girlfriend.

If you don't want to cheat, don't. The end game is to demonstrate to your SO that you have the capability to replace her at a moments' notice, by the virtue of you being the kind of man many women want to be with.

Read the 12 steps of Dread to gain a better understanding about jealousy/preselection/and slowly showing your SO you're becoming a better man that she'd think twice before dropping, as she probably wouldn't be able to branch swing higher. This calls the idea of what does she bring to the relationship to "deserve" you, and is designed to elicit respect, sex, and partnership.

You don't have to cheat, it just has to appear that you have the ability.

Orbiters are like a bullpen for women - full of guys "at the ready" to step in. For validation, for girlfriend talks, for banishing lonlieness, and (OHGODOHGOD I Hope she one day trips and falls on my dick! I'll treat her like gold!). Orbiters are a stable of men that pray they'll one day get the chance to fuck her.

Plates are women you fuck with no strings attached.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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