I thought it would be a good idea to share a great video "Surrendered Wives" originally found and shared by another member.

It's a long video, and I know it's hard to invest that kind of time on something so I'll provide a brief synopsis.

Some questions are posed near the start of the video, as a group of women sit and talk in a circle:

"Do you feel superior to your husband?", "Do you nag your husband?" with the options of 'rarely,' 'sometimes,' and 'often.'

The audience is introduced to self described "feminist and former shrew" Laura Doyle, the author of The Surrendered Wife. She talks about her six principles: relinquishing control, respecting the husband, receiving his gifts graciously, expressing your vulnerability, taking care of yourself...and two others I didn't catch apparently. Laura states that her book is for women that are strong, smart, controlling, stubborn, and still feel lonely at the end of the day.

Then we're introduced to some other women. Connie, a divorced woman struggling to commit to her BF. She jokes that "Connie" is short for "Controlling." She's skeptical that Doyle's book/class will work, but wants to give it a try. Fun detail, she's Jewish, wants her SO to commit, and hates that he loves shooting guns. She's unwilling to listen to what he thinks, her feelings are more important and therefore, the only valid ones. Adding to her charm, she mocks the Boy Scouts (a great place for young boys to learn skills, create friendships etc). She abhors the idea of 'serving' a man. Stubborn woman, with too much make-up and zero gratitude alert! To the surprise of no one, Connie immediately jumps to the obscene caricature of what it means to 'surrender' and assumes that her SO will not only abuse his status as leader, but do so gleefully and with spite. On the other hand, he has a very balanced understanding of what his role should be with this dynamic. He wants to be responsible, and means well.

When the narrator claims that Doyle is asking women to 'give away' their power, she replies that she's only asking women to re-think how they've been trained to negotiate. She a supporter of feminism, to a certain extent. She's accused of being old-fashioned, and happily accepts the title of 'sexist' within the sphere of her relationship without shame.

The next woman the audience is introduced to is Tammie, a woman now working on her 3rd marriage. She's immediately unhappy with the lack of presents from her husband. She wants grand romantic gestures. She blames her husband for the lack of appreciation. Her husband admits that if he isn't the leader, it's because he gave up that role - but he did so for peace. Once again, the woman's description of the issues in no way reflect the man's description of what's actually going on. Have we noticed a pattern yet? Initially Tammie blames her husband for everything, he admits there's blame to go around. He has ambitions, and she just criticizes the way he acts. She admits that she has a sharp tongue and not enough compassion. Tammie is a compulsive nagger. He wants a wife with a mind of her own - the caveat is that her opinions are delivered in a cruel way. He's being cut down by the woman that should be building him up.

Doyle tells the women that they will lose their desire to control.

Merilee (could be spelling her name wrong). Former over-eater, and drinker, she's not only engaged but also a business partner with her man. She wants the ideal dream relationship, and her man is saying they may already have the ideal relationship, she just can't see it. He reminds her to say "us' instead of just referring to herself. Merilee struggles to resolve her 'woman power' with her desire to surrender and trust the man she loves.

One thing to note - ALL of these women have children from previous marriages.

So that's the jumping off part for the video. How things develop for each woman, and her relationship is something you'll have to discover for yourself by watching the video. :0)