TheRedArchive

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[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

What I found thought provoking in this piece was the way she adjusted her attitude toward a chore she generally disliked.

After realizing what a mood lift I got from nesting, it dawned on me that it’s something I have been denying myself, another piece of the feminist narrative it’s high time to discard. There’s nothing “wrong” or “demeaning” in nesting. Quite the opposite — it’s surprisingly deeply gratifying. Nurturing — both to myself and others.

There are chores I really do not like, but I do really like when they are done, and I like the result and the after effects. So I'm going to try to change my mindset on these chores. Focus on how I will feel when they are done, and now how I feel right now while I do them.

[–]RedInkRiotEarly 30s, Married 3 years)5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I love the way you put this! It's like exercise. I don't do it because I love the way my lungs burn and the way I sweat my face off when I'm doing cardio, but I do love the rush of endorphins I get from it.

[–]Trauma_Burn_RNEarly 20s / Married 1.5 yr / Together 35 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I get a lot of joy putting everything back where it goes, and although I'm not a huge shopper, I like picking up little homey things to make our nest a nice place to be. I buy fresh flowers every week, and I try to bake every couple of days to fill the house with a cinnamonny fug. Despite my tendency to kill them, I keep little plants around to make the house seem alive.

I also make an effort to make my decor match. Not in a picture-perfect magazine kind of way, but in a, "not burnt orange shag rug with granny flower couch" kind of way. Then it's comfortable, but also thought over :)

We moved recently, and I had most of the house unpacked that night - I was so excited to finally have a little nest of our own!

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I don't clean. It's just not my thing. However, I do tidy up. Someone actually gave me a 30 day cleaning/purging schedule (which of course has taken me since July 29th to get half of the way through it lol). But I have noticed that when I do tidy up I feel better. Especially after a particularly long day. Knowing that I've left the house tidy is somehow even more relaxing. But overall I just pay someone to do the dirty work.

[–]QueenBee1264 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Oooooh! I love this post! It SO sums up how I feel about cleaning. And also exercising! Once I get over the initiation of the activity, it feels so good! Cleaning promotes a calm serenity and exercising a joyful exuberance :)

[–]TempestTcup 3 points3 points [recovered] | Copy Link

A good friend taught me a wonderful trick she used to get going — set the timer for 15 minutes per room, get as far as you can in 15 minutes, then either take a break, move on to another room, or spend another 15 minute burst in the same area. Somehow knowing I am only going to spend 15 minutes cleaning makes it seem less overwhelming and it is surprising just how far one can get in a 15 minute sprint. Before you know it, you’re done!

We do this except we set the egg timer for 3 minutes - we call it "The Three Minute Miracle". We rarely quit when the 3 minutes are up though; there's always something else to pick up or another surface to wipe.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I like using the washing machine and dryer as timers. But certainly longer chunks of time.

[–]Kittenkajira1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I do something similar! My husband pointed out that if I just do 3 periods of 45 minutes a day, then that's only 2.25 hours! I think of how much cleaning I can get done in 45 minutes, or how much sewing, etc. It somehow helps me get in the right mindset and avoid procrastination. So I decide what 3-4 things I want to do, set a timer for 45 minutes and get going on the first.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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