Not that your emotions should control your relationship, but the cold truth is that they often do control your relationship to a certain point. People are largely reactive, and going by the often repeated truth of “you can only change yourself”, your emotions somewhat control the emotions in your closest relationships. When you are mopey and blah, your husband reacts to your state. Sure, he might do funny/nice things to try to cheer you up at first, but after a while, he will fall into your state of mind. What usually happens next is that you will snap out of your funk, but he is still in his second-hand funk. Then you get irritated, LOL!
Think about when you are with a somber person; that emotion rubs off. Likewise, when you are with a bunch of excited happy people you catch those emotions and usually become happy and excited also. Not only are upbeat emotions good for you and your wellbeing, but they are good for everyone around you. Be determined to keep a happy, friendly attitude! It’s catching!
The best way to have an upbeat outlook on life is simple: don’t take things personally. Other people have bad days too, and their brush-off of you is usually a reaction of their own mood, and has nothing to do with you. If your husband is frustrated at work and ranting, don’t internalize his mood; it has nothing to do with you. Be patient, supporting, and it will pass quickly. If you read something that offends you on the internet, realize that being upset is your choice, and what you read was one-dimensional digital sound bites of other humans. You can never fully know a person online.
Everyone has emotions, and most negative emotions are immediate and uncontrollable, but your reactions to those emotions don’t have to be. You can step back, take a moment, and sort out the reason for the emotion and proceed from there. You can decide whether or not to let the negative emotion ruin your day: you can wallow in it and inflict it on others, or you can brush it off and return to your previous, unruffled state of mind. Whatever you do, try to not take those unproductive emotions home with you!
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