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Yesterday I approached 100 women as part of a bake sale at my uni (the rest of the team just stood at the stall while I moved around approaching any passerbys and kept a tally). I learned a lot from the experience, but one thing which stood out is how similar women are to children.

Towards the end of the 4 hours it began to 'click' - approaching women became natural and fluid, and the successful interactions beared resemblance with interacting with children. For example, using lines you'd typically use on children, complimenting them and watching their eyes light up, using varying tones of voice etc. I then had no problem approaching even groups of 2-3 hot girls and I felt amazing.

Next day (today) I'm beginning to see women as mature adults again, if that makes sense. I realised that this is what causes me to fuck up and have approach anxiety and boring conversations.

Do I just need to keep at it to train myself to interact with women as though they are children? Is there any other way to facilitate this change in perception?


[–]TheStumblingWolf150 points151 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

In my experience there are a bunch of them who are mature adults (one is a very good friend of mine), but common to them all is they want you to talk to the child in them and make them laugh and feel like a girl.

[–]pythasaurus55 points56 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

I agree, one of my female coursemates has been a good friend of mine for years and is one of the most mature and intelligent people on my course. But even she reacts positively when spoken to like a little girl.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes and this is so true of most people.

I see EVERYBODY — man or woman, wealthy or poor, sophisticated or simple — as child-like unless I know they are red pill.

[–]HangOnVoltaire1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lol

[–]I_Luv_Procastinating66 points67 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

I'm not sure if this applies or not but I read How to Win Friends and Influence People and found that some of the book's principles could relate to treating women like children. For example, always positive reinforcement, being enthusiastic, saying the girl's name multiple times throughout the conversation, compliment and then criticize (aka push pull) and maybe being genuinely interested in her. Sure these principles apply to all people but whenever I game, I emphasize these points and have found solid results.

Another good verbal technique is to give her a nickname as you would give a nickname to a kid. Whenever you call her (Tay Tay for example) and she actively responds to it positively, she is acting in your frame. If she does something wrong or something you don't like, you call her by her real full name and this will get her full attention and she'll know she fucked up. Again, this technique seems very similar to raising kids I'd imagine.

[–]pythasaurus4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Excellent points, going to use the nickname thing, thanks!

[–]MisterMarbles198821 points22 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I've got my girl to respond to "knuckle head". I lost her in a store one time and shouted "knuckle head!" like you would to a lost child. She responded "Yes?" an aisle over and the dude near us bust out laughing.

[–]Strikingable10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Man i laughed out loud

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This deserves gold 😂😂

[–]negrow1231 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Need more of these ....

[–][deleted] 61 points62 points  (12 children) | Copy Link

I took a bag of cherries and lychees to an outdoor bar once by accident, walked around the bar handing them out, met everyone there.

[–]pythasaurus29 points30 points  (11 children) | Copy Link

Yo I'm stealing this.

[–][deleted] 39 points40 points  (10 children) | Copy Link

Yeah, was one of those fun nights for me, made out with the bartender and took another girl home aha

Funnily, everyone wanted a piece of fruit except for a few beta looking sobs who said I should wash them as their girls reached over them and grabbed some. (faces were priceless)

[–]Gordon-G13 points14 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Be safe..HPV is rampant

[–]Sad_Sleeper5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Indeed and most of the people have no idea that they are transmitting it.

[–]pythasaurus13 points14 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Haha ballsy of you to approach couples, it's always hard to tell when the guy is an insecure bitch. I almost exclusively approach lone girls or girls in groups including yesterday, although I always catch the occassional beta giving me confrontational looks from afar.

[–]MisterMarbles198814 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I used to work in a gym selling personal training. I'd walk up a row of people on cardio machines and open them with my sales pitch. But my manager pointed out a huge error: I was only approaching the obviously out of shape people. This was noticeable to them and looked like I was targeting them. A better approach, he said, is to approach EVERYONE, even the really in-shape people who don't need personal training. That way you look like you're offering the services to everyone, not just the fat people.

[–][deleted] 23 points24 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Ahh I'm a few years past just talking to women, I talk to everyone when I'm out now, anyone and everyone.

I make new friends, new business connections, funny stories, learn about the world and get laid.

And yeah some men get pretty territorial, but I can disarm them pretty quick now, my intentions are genuine anyway and I'd rather just escalate a single woman lol

note: I've been going out on the town about 90% of the time by myself for around 10 years.

[–]FancyShip0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

How did you get used to going out on your own? Is it as awkward as people make it out to be?

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I don't know why people say it is awkward, never experienced that myself.

At the minimum you can just sit down and people watch for fun.

No one has ever judged me for being out alone, I would say no one ever realizes I'm out alone.

And the time where people have asked who I'm with, I say myself, and they always say something nice about how I'm independent blah blah

[–]koldkillah834 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

What did you say was the reason for bringing them? I want to try this

[–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I did by accident,bought them in the city earlier, had them in my bag, was eating one and noticed the bartender looking at me. So walked over to the bar with one for each staff member. They loved it, so went back got the bag and gave to people around me, then just got up and walked around the bar.

(5-7pm still day light)

[–]koldkillah832 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I’ll try this

[–]iFunnyPrince12 points13 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

It could be that you're imagining them as children and that helps, but I find practice helps the most. I used to have CRIPPLING social anxiety (couldn't even get a job) but when you work at a place where the staff is like 80% female you learn to talk to attractive women quick. They're just hot, doesn't automatically make them better than you. Flirting is a whole different ball game, but if you're looking to build up the courage to engage in conversation all it takes is consistent practice! You don't even need to know what to say; your body has a filter that tells you what to say and what not to say in these situations, and as long as you're not in a professional environment you need to turn that filter off. You'll never run out of things to talk about, which is great if you have problems with that like I do!

[–]pythasaurus1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is interesting because I recognise that my 'filter' is off around old friends and family. As I got more comfortable with strangers yesterday my filter just switched off out of tiredness and I began to exude an IDGAF vibe which helped a lot. You're probably right though, it falls down to practice I guess.

[–]Ubiquitous-Toss30 points31 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Have you talked to them at the bar? They make it hard not to. Last weekend I asked my friend a dumb astrology question and ended up going around asking girls if they believed in it. Several of the girls I convinced I was psychic with those stupid astro predictions "oh you're an empathic and emotional being"

[–]pythasaurus19 points20 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Haha reminds me of the time I convinced a girl I was the descendant of an Ancient Egyptian Pharaoh, and yes this was at a bar. The characters in 'How I Met Your Mother' also game women in a similar fashion. Sucks we have to dumb ourselves down to such a level but hey it works.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

In the end, it's really just people wanting to have freedom like children do. Let go of the pressure to be adult for a moment.

It's like those smart women you know from work, take them to a club (and not in plain sight of her boss and other co workers) and they'll get stupid because they're at a club.

[–]terminaldoubt5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lmao astrologer tells girls what girls are like

[–]hrm089412 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Have you ever argued with one? They literally have no logical capacity.

Women cry whenever they don't get what they want or have to face consequences (from their actions). You know who else does that? Children.

[–]jbpostv33 points34 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

The idea here is to stimulate them and make them react emotionally. The substance, maturity or even appropriateness matters less than if they feel stimulated and you feel confident with it. It's honestly really annoying to have to go around dumbing yourself down or not even making sense. Its an internal shift in the mind and its hard not to feel distant, better and manipulative of women walking around stirring their emotional pots you yourself lack as a emotionally mature, stoic man. I love to joke around, poke fun and stoke but I find it repulsive that we have to operate at their level. Used to be the other way around before the sexual revolution.

[–]thiikn-3 points-2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Too far

[–]TRP VanguardWhisper36 points37 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

You don't have to train yourself to see women as mentally childlike. They are mentally childlike. All you have to do is observe.

What you need to realize is that you have been trained to see women as adults. You have been conditioned to deny the reality reported by your own eyes and ears.

What you must do is overcome this conditioning.

Think about it. If you say, for example, that women should not be voting, then what is people's response?

Do they say "No, they should, because XYZ." ?

No, they don't say that. They immediately conduct an inquisition into whether or not you like women, and whether you are a good person. The effective message here is that if you do not express certain sentiments about women, and especially if you express some other sentiments instead, you will not be debated, you will be retaliated against.

Fear of the judgement of others, and of social ostracism, is a powerful force within the human psyche, and, yes, using it you can get people to deny the evidence of their own senses, or, more often, to find increasingly threadbare rationalizations to explain it away.

The idea that women are not fully mature or emotionally stable is not a new one. Most societies throughout human history have believed this to one extent or another. Our society would have you believe they were all sexist and wrong.

Well, that leaves unanswered a very important question: why? Why did they believe this? Why did this idea crop up again, and again, and again, if it flew in the face of all the evidence? This question doesn't really get addressed... except by a sotto voce response of "stop asking, or we will make bad things happen to you".

You haven't been given an answer to the question of whether women are adults or not, or why people of the past believed they weren't. You've simply been trained not to ask. Which means you don't have to "train" yourself to believe a particular answer to this question. You simply have to allow yourself to ask it, even if, for your own well-being and safety, you do so merely in the privacy of your own head.

So just watch women, and ask yourself the question. Does this behaviour match with my definition of emotional maturity? How would I react to a man who did what I just saw?

[–]pythasaurus6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Excellent breakdown, I've saved this comment. Thanks.

[–]Hsnbrg5011 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I just saved this comment, thanks.

[–]1Terminal-Psychosis8 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

No "training" to it...

More like deprogramming. Opening yer eyes to objective reality.

You're learning to be charming. Sounds like a great practice run.

[–]julianthepagan-2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lolololololololololol

[–]_Ulan_ 1 points [recovered]  (3 children) | Copy Link

Ask a girls you are interested in "what's her goals in life" - And judge for yourself

[–]boredrandomguy5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I like asking that question. Unfortunately, some take it as too heavy of a thing to ask and get a bit freaked out by it.

[–]ProFriendZoner2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Ask "What's good in your life?" If it's negative, bail. If it's positive, ask about it, she's in a good mood and you made her that way.

[–]MartinVDK913 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I do think that comes with first reading, than actually experiencing it or if you are a natural, you know this from the start. But I'd say, get more personal experiences with girls aka dates, going out, partying with them to see their childlike behaviour they are quick to judge us about.

[–]redvelvet_oreo2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Keep spectating. It will sink in eventually. If you really want to UP the ante, try to befriend or plate what society deems a “sophisticated woman” a doctor or lawyer someone who has success. Eventually there will come a point where they will have an emotional meltdown about something as small as “her” purse got scratched and break down and tears hysterically like if her child died. Once you see something like that especially from more than one woman you can’t really unsee it.

Every guy has witnessed the child like behavior before. The good and the bad but the bad is what really sticks out for me. I think for most guys their initial reaction to a woman’s insane emotional meltdown over nothing is complete confusion and then trying to fix whatever she’s on about. When you connect the dots and compare a woman’s psyche to that of a child it really starts to make sense.

[–]Internet-Troll2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I think it is not about child or not, you felt amazing because it was your job, you have a strong reason to back you up mentally. So with that reason, you don't see failure as a set back, you just move on to the next girl passing by, and because it is your job, you don't feel the pressure of being judged because you can put that on the job. It being a job just took a lot pressure off you that's why you were able to perform a lot better

[–]pythasaurus2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I can see where you are coming from and I agree to an extent - I had a reason to approach them which removed much of the awkwardness. However, many of them reacted pleasantly even before I mentioned I was part of the bake sale. This was because I approached them with the confidence and quirkiness I'd use when speaking to a child. It would definitely be harder (but more rewarding) cold approaching 100 women outside of a sales job.

As a sidenote, the experience also taught me that 9s and 10s are actually easier to approach, which I've read about here on TRP.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I mean not as children, but if that gets you in the right head space go for it. I certainly give most people too much credit and it fucks with me. My expectations are terribly high.

Please go forth and continue your thinking of them as children strategy. I want to see a couple dozen field reports please. Very curious.

[–]pythasaurus4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The strategy is certainly the best for putting me in an IDGAF mentality until I find something better. I'm getting excited though, challenge accepted - I'll feed back to you in the summer.

RemindMe! 6 months

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Do I just need to keep at it to train myself to see women as children?

yes

Are there more ways to facilitate this change in perception?

observation

[–]SigmaTalks1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Frame control!

Have a strong frame, be driven and don't tolerate shit. Most logical females end up acting like cute girls when you shut the door on their bullshit. Put yourself first and let them follow.

[–]throwawaybpdnpd1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It was very easy for me, it’s easier to get them to act like a child than seriously

[–]Gordon-G1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes I can confirm your findings to be true

[–]someonesopinion69690 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

We were all babies once, think of that what you will.

It' already says a lot of this stuff in the sidebar if you read that. something about mental maturity

[–]reddituser11030 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

View women as sex toys.

[–]AshyBoneVR40 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

How did you train yourself to see women as child-like?

I talked to them and watched their actions.

[–]matt6750 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I didn't have to, I could just tell even from young teenagehood when i was still BP

[–]addwater0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

By raising your status / smv.

[–]gbnz870 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I wouldnt treat them as children per say. You can have a mature conversation but the way I see it is that every bit of energy you put into the conversation she will reflect back (assuming she likes you) Talking to a girl like a child really wont get you much further than a quick flirt imo.

To me it seems you need to talk with a bit more emotion (as Im assuming you talk to an adult like youd talk to your friends or your parents)

[–]mrpoopistan0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I don't see women as childlike. In fact, in the vast majority of circumstances, women can be very intelligent.

The thing is, you have to treat them like total degenerate junkies in two situations:

  1. When a guy is the prize. Women are downright dangerous when the thing on the right-hand side of the equation is a man that they want.
  2. Whenever a female competitor comes into the picture.

As for talking to them like children, you should speak that way to everyone until they prove they deserve better. Most people are fucking morons who are praying someone will come lead them.

I realised that this is what causes me to fuck up and have approach anxiety and boring conversations

No it isn't. You're just anxious and boring. Don't externalize that shit. Take ownership of it and fix it.

[–]AceMav21-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Fucking just have fun and flirt with them. Stop being so fuckibg cerebral and socially disinhibit yourself brah.

[–]xrKles-2 points-1 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

You just don’t get it. Your going to talk to your boss differently then you would your best friend, and they very well might be the same person.

Women are mature adults you dont have to train yourself to do shit, but if your gaming... then it does help to talk to them as a child.

Its not always the best way to go.. but good to see you out there getting experience

[–]SICFJC-4 points-3 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

It's you're you fucking moron

[–]xrKles-1 points0 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

See. This is what I mean. Fucking idiots on TRP now can't even have a decent conversation. If you are going to insult someone, might as well do it well.

[–]pythasaurus1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Lmfao ignore him, you made some very valid points. One thing to keep in mind is that all of us who come to TRP come from very different starting points e.g. my previous friends were extremely religious BPers to the point where even talking to girls was taboo. Because of this I hadn't had the chance to learn even how to hold a conversation with a girl.

23YO and by myself now, I'm trying to build my social circle up from scratch. I'm learning basics which most of you guys have already mastered in high school. The bake sale the other day was a major breakthrough for me because I've never approached so many women in such a short space of time. There were tons of things to take away, but the key thing for me was that most girls have an inner child in them.

You're right, 'accessing' this child would be a lot different (or even a foolish move) for a mature female boss than, for example, a hot girl at the gym. However, by throwing myself in to deep end week after week, it is precisely these differences I'm trying to master so that I can pull in almost any situation.

[–]xrKles1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Nice! You got a good head. Keep it up.

[–]SICFJC-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Am I wrong though ?

[–]apost54-5 points-4 points  (11 children) | Copy Link

This sub is going to shit.

[–]pythasaurus-1 points0 points  (10 children) | Copy Link

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