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So I’ve been trying to escalate with this girl. Been on 3 dates and have only made out. We were watching a movie at my place when she got a text from some guy named Jacob, when she opened it they had been texting each other paragraphs, she didn’t notice I saw. She’s a very shy girl so this baffled me that she’s talking to some guy so in-depth. I do some digging and find out she’s been dating this guy for over 2 years long distance while at college. Idk what to do anymore. Makes me a little sick knowing every time we spent together was meaningless. Why do women even get in long distance relationships? Why is she cheating on this guy with me. Hurting us both.

Edit: thanks for everything guys this actually means a lot. I’m still internalizing the fact that men will never be loved the way we want to, or that men will be loved at all. I feel broken inside because I imagined I would be happy in a relationship which is clearly not possible. You guys mean the world to me by not giving me feel good bullshit.


[–]rizzyfromthe9427 points428 points  (11 children) | Copy Link

Actually she’s cheating on that guy with you, she doesn’t care about him clearly.

You have extreme oneitis. Talking about our time together is meaningless when you’ve only been on 3 dates?? Get a grip

[–][deleted] 146 points147 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

You’re completely right.

[–]alphabachelor99 points100 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Having oneitis is bad enough. Having oneitis for a cheating thot is the worst.

[–][deleted] 18 points19 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Your time together isn't totally meaningless, it's great practice for you. Keep pushing ahead. Never mention the boyfriend, just enjoy your time with her and remember that's she's not LTR material ever.

I mean never ever.

[–]Crailberry2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Aka use a condom.

[–]Ill_mumble_that0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

And treat her like a whore in bed, because she is.

[–]Crailberry1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Ok then.

[–]bleuge17 points18 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

And you are Absolutely right, Sir.

[–]cornylamygilbert3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I mean, 3 dates and she hasn’t put out and you care about your relationship with her?

Any emotional investment is a sign of a lack of abundance. I can empathize with needless investment but you gotta right the ship ASAP.

your biggest problem is that you aren’t exploring other opportunities already.

Lastly, some dude long distance texting paragraphs with a shy girl? I see nothing here worth contemplation or action

[–]kylerosa211 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

First step to fixing it is acknowledging it. Good stuff OP, it’s a learning experience for you, don’t stress about this girl

[–]StopBitching990 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Give her a big ass hickey on her neck so her boyfriend notices

[–]Endorsed ContributorFereallyRed137 points138 points  (15 children) | Copy Link

You're not even fucking her.

LTR/LDR... why does this matter to you?

She's in your place, with you. Why aren't you fucking?

The answer to that question is why she hasn't let go of the Jacob branch yet.

[–]OrdinariusManhattan 1 points [recovered]  (14 children) | Copy Link

"Why aren't you fucking?"

I dunno, maybe he has some dignity

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet17 points18 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

She's a warm hole to enjoy. The only dignity he need be concerned with is escalating quickly and not letting her waste his time.

You need to get over your shame of being an animal, bro.

[–]OrdinariusManhattan 1 points [recovered]  (6 children) | Copy Link

"just get over your shame of being an animal bro"

You wouldn't think that if I pulled your eyes out of their sockets and made you eat them, then the rest of your internal organs. You are just rationalizing your unethical behaviour with a 3 IQ argument, just like women.

This is the type of rationalization(or hAmStErInG) that have always been used by degenerate piece of shits throught the history of humankind. You have no difference than the disgusting women people here talk about. It's pathetic.

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

You wouldn't think that if I pulled your eyes out of their sockets and made you eat them, then the rest of your internal organs. You are just rationalizing your unethical behaviour with a 3 IQ argument, just like women.

I will never harm or hurt a person for something like this. I will be someone I respect. I'd advise you the same.

LMAO except for me. I better watch my ass.

Faggot triggered. My work is done here.

[–]redpillcad1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Nobody here needs your respect. Nor your approval or permission to carry on any which way we want

[–]Endorsed ContributorFereallyRed2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Define "dignity". and tell me why it's important.

[–]Aeterni_0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Redpillers don't care about virtue anymore? Or are you just a LARPer?

[–]OrdinariusManhattan 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy Link

Shut the fuck up you edgy fuck

[–]Endorsed ContributorFereallyRed0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lord. The term you're looking for is edgelord.

Try answering my questions, though.

[–]ChadTheWaiter10031 points32 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It’s not meaningless. Stop being a pussy. What did you want to marry her after 3 dates?

[–]JackPallance71 points72 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Not only did she know you could see her texts, she let you see on purpose.

[–]Enlightened_Chimp38 points39 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Yep. Happened to me the other tonight. Girl was over and she wanted to watch Netflix with me on her phone in my bed instead of on my TV. Then in the middle of the show her Bumble starts blowing up and I realized it's just a shit test.

[–]MYMOUTHISNUMmn10 points11 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Well. How did you respond

[–]Enlightened_Chimp24 points25 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Couldn't care less. This girl asked me to facial her the first night I met her which immediately removes her from any type of GF consideration lmao. I just have to be incredibly careful to always use protection with her.

[–]cornylamygilbert4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

obviously who cares about her bumble shit but why did you ever agree to watch anything on her phone vs your tv? That sounds like the dumbest compromise I’ve ever heard of

[–]zxcvb780964 points65 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

Women are community property lol

[–]AwakenedSovereign14 points15 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

This is the true meaning of "AWALT".

Once it really clicks women get easier to deal with, because you are no longer trying to invent a fantasy out of thin air. You just deal with the woman as she is.

And what they are is community bicycles. Ride one where you tryna go then put it back. Wipedown optional.

[–]omega_dawg935 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

always give a woman the chance to show you exactly who she is... and never try to make her what she's not.

[–]BookyMcBooks7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I guess it takes a while for this to sink in huh?

Seems like many posts here are guys who are still under the illusion that women are loyal, innocent princesses.

[–]RedHoodhandles3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Including tragedy of the commons..

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Politics!

[–]LucrativeMath2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This shit made me giggle. Thank you for that.

[–]Atheist_Utopia2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

🤣🤣🤣🤣 killed me

[–]KillaJewels67 points68 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

3 dates, no balls deep action yet, and you already developed feelings? Sounds like you got some tunnel vision going.

It sounds like you're inexperienced and haven't developed strong boundaries yet. Why involve yourself with someone that has baggage like that?

Go date/fuck other girls man. It'll be good for you.

[–]you_seem_angry111 points112 points  (29 children) | Copy Link

Take her phone, text him a pic of you and explain the situation to him. Then hide from her.

[–]raoko36 points37 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This comment is underrated

[–][deleted] 37 points38 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

A+. Bonus points if your cock is visible.

[–]SolarTortality5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lmao

[–]cornylamygilbert0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

this tho. put the phone down your pants and send the dick pic

tho any guy engaged in a LDR already likely doesn’t value his time or worth already

[–]Soliquidsnake0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Just the tip too

[–]someonesopinion69696 points7 points  (18 children) | Copy Link

This is a forum for sexual strategy, do this if you don't want to fuck the girl anymore

[–]cimsoc17 points18 points  (12 children) | Copy Link

Life strategy*

FTFY

[–]The_Ace_of_Knaves 1 points [recovered]  (4 children) | Copy Link

Sometimes helping a brother out is better than sexual gratification.

[–]someonesopinion69691 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Are you here to get laid or are you here to be captain save a bro?

Make your choice

[–]The_Ace_of_Knaves 1 points [recovered]  (2 children) | Copy Link

I don’t have to make a choice, I can do both. Y’all get so caught up in your sex fantasies that you forget to live a little. How to get laid is not my main takeaway from trp, and it’s not the concepts original point. The life and mentality changes that come with trp allow me to actually make whatever choice I want on a case by case basis not alike my past self that would be maniacally sex desperate.

[–]someonesopinion69690 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

I'm not saying to be manically sex desperate, becoming your best self who women find attractive is clearly cookie cutter advice, red pill gives you the truth and it's up to you to do what you want with that.

if you didn't come here to get laid, what did you come here for?

http://puerarchy.com/2013/07/09/sexual-strategy-is-amoral/

[–]UncleChido2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Username kinda checks.

[–]Kpwn880 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

Of you are going to do this, at least fuck her first so you can send a pic of your cock with her pussy juice on it.

[–]shredzro2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lmao trp has some weirdos

[–]redpillcad0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Srlrsy retarded.

If it bothers you, ghost. Otherwise plow forward

[–]BookyMcBooks11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Bro, you're supposed to fuck her, not care about her.

[–]imtheoneimmortal36 points37 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

She was with you at your couch ready to fuck

But ofc you get angry because she talks with a guy on phone who is virtual

Dude just chill and enjoy the present moment

[–]BusterVadge20 points21 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Why is she cheating on this guy with me. Hurting us both.

Your mistake is being so weak that a girl you date 3 times has the ability to hurt you. Time to man up, my friend.

Get a mission in life, lift, and go into monk mode until you're a stronger man.

[–]vivid_mind8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

If you didn't put your dick in her vagina then indeed your time together was meaningless.

[–]Endorsed ContributorUEMcGill20 points21 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Makes me a little sick knowing every time we spent together was meaningless.

It's just your turn.

Don't take this as negative information. Just take it as another learning point on how to properly vet a woman. She's just reached peak promotion status and should never go beyond 'plate' in the bitches hierarchy.

Fuck her. Maybe you'll do the other guy a favor, and he'll hit the gym to become a beast.

[–]framelessglasses2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It's just your turn.

It's just her turn....

[–]cluelessguitarist5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It all comes to this,do you want to be the sideguy with benefits or the guy texting her in the other side of the country?

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You've not even fucked her, you have extreme oneitis. Why the fuck do you care about the time you spent together? You need to work on focusing on yourself and developing abundance.

You can't be so weak as to get hurt by a girl you have been on 3 dates with. Build yourself.

[–]Hambone_Malone3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You haven't even fucked her. You are clearly delusional.

[–]mrpoopistan2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Three whole dates!

Overreacting much?

[–]Moldy_Gecko2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Dude, that's like me bitching about fucking married chicks. Why does this bother you? You're obviously the one she chose at the moment, meaning to her, you have higher value. Just escalate. 3rd date movie at your house should equal sex. If a girl is at your house, your only job is to bat away ASD and shit tests and it's guaranteed sex.

[–]boom_bostic2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Be thankful that you got a look behind the curtains...without her knowing you did so.

Now you have insider knowledge and are in a better position than before. It’s amazing how fast a young man can wisen up if you add a little sobering heartache to the situation. It’s how most guys become men. Any pain you’ve felt, is just growth. The biggest thing is now you are acutely aware of how this woman is playing you & her boyfriend. She’s completely oblivious to it. Use it to your advantage. Be thankful that you didn’t put years into this woman only to find out that she has been playing you. You invested roughly 3 dates with her. I wonder what the other bf has invested?

[–]WayneNolting2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

What if I told you that you could have meaningful, short-term relationships, with many women?

[–]someonesopinion69691 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Bro, read the sidebar. That's not awalt, thats you being in a relationship with a girl who is dating someone else

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Haha you have no idea. It fucks with their heads too. After you get some experience you can start to see patterns and avoid women like this.

These kind of girls get jealous of happy relationships too. It's funny and sad to see. They want the relationship but can't help but finding they have too many options and can't stick with one guy. There's always someone better out there and for these girls it's easy to get.

It's also best to play it as when she's with you she's yours and if she's not with you she's someone else's. Loyalty is a hard thing to come by unless you're way above her in SMV

[–]SirAttackHelicopter1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Lets be clear on this: she has no intentions on cheating with you. Its been 3 dates and no escalations. You are just a friend.

[–]omega_dawg930 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

iow he's her time whore

[–]Totsean1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

One date and bang is my policy, if it ain't happening on the first date, I am not interested.

[–]Hyper_Sonik1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You gotta bang this chick or at least try so that you know where you stand with her. It sounds like she's using you as a fill in "teddy bear".

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Somebody having an emotional attachment to another person doesn't invalidate your relationship with them, OP. If you want to do the monogamy thing discuss it with your partner. Further, keep in mind you'd feel differently if this was a sibling, friend, or family member. You are exercising prejudice against this person because you fear competition from them. How do you think that insecurity looks to others?

Your time wasn't meaningless and she's not cheating - not on either of you, unless there's an agreement put in place (ie. monogamy). DO NOT make assumptions. Perhaps she's non-mono, or perhaps she's just dating you casually until she's figured you out better and wants to stop seeing other people.

Also, if you're talking to ANYONE else that you have a romantic interest in, stop complaining immediately.

[–]omega_dawg930 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

da fuck are you talking about...

[–]Moldy_Gecko-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

He's talking about the blue pill.

[–]RedSkeller0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

It gets a lot worse than that my dude. She's playing the long game with this other guy, which is every LDR in a nutshell. She's opening texts in front of you and you've been on 3 dates and only made out - she's waiting for Chad to show up.

[–]the13thmonk0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Stop your oneitis. Particularly in college.

This is the time to play the field.

[–]ASAP_IKER0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lmao she was at your place and you didn't make a move? That's the real problem here. Who care if she's in a LDR, she was there to get the D and you failed.

[–]SimplyFishOil0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Who gives a fuck? You're getting ass and you don't have to ever meet the guy

[–]Bedtimeshine0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Stop crying. Either have the bells to let this be a casual fuck buddy situatuon. Or cut her off and tell her boyfriend. Stop acting heart broken over A girl you’ve gone 3 dates with. This won’t be the last time this happens to you.

[–]shredzro0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

She knew bro. Lol she just doesn’t care. You’re the side nigguh.

[–]Don_Draper270 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Bro, you already have feelings for some girl you haven't even fucked? Wake up. Read "The Rationale Male"

[–]Lib-Tears-in-my-cup0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Show interest in pounding the fuck out of her. This is called “sexual frame”. If she doesn’t reciprocate interest, hit the next button.

[–]HurricaneHugues0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I keep telling you guys to always assume that theur base N count is 50 and that they have 2 secret boyfriends. Pit them all in one basket and let them sort thenselves out. That way you never get surprised when u find out she's actually seeing 3 other people and/or has a boyfriend.

[–]ishyman0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Hah that’s I met my ex. Never knew she had a boyfriend up north. Turns out “taking a break” means cheating. They’re on a “break”.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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