TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

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Got bored so I told my LTR I wanted to “take a break”, she was upset but eventually agreed. She still. Ones over regularly to fuck clean and leave. Low stress low effort. I’m fully expecting her to find someone else and I’m okay with that.

Not even a week after we started telling people some of my friends are swooping in on her like vultures on a dead body. Nothing enough for me to call out, but I’m not stupid and neither is she. People are getting my Facebook just so they can find her and message her, flirtatious touching in person, and trying to bury her in pity and attention. Trying to initiate conversation.

I don’t care who she fucks at this point but it’s really pissing me off, for some reason I feel a huge amount of disrespect and a lack of loyalty. I’ve had several opportunities where I was APROACHED by my friends for rebound sex and I denied them each time, because my friendship wasn’t worth pussy. Am I being sensitive?


[–]MODVigilantRedRooster[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (4 children) | Copy Link

One may challenge or attack ideas presented by ECs and we welcome this, but attacking them personally is against one of our more important rules.

Temp ban for those moralizing to OP about covert Bro Code while violating written TRP code.

[–]HurricaneHugues707 points708 points  (117 children) | Copy Link

Don't listen to any of the phaggots here. You're surrounded by vultures. Those are not your friends. They have no other options so they go after your scraps. They don't respect themselves and they don't respect you. Ditch those clowns.

If i were u I would nut in her mouth and tell her to go and send me a Snap of her kissing one of them. Fuck those clowns.

[–]Pokeylaw161 points162 points  (34 children) | Copy Link

That's fucking Savage LMAO

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten94 points95 points  (32 children) | Copy Link

...but it's not a complete thought. Let's talk nuance here for a second, /u/Red-455.

You can't simultaneously believe these two things:

I'm fully expecting her to find somebody else soon / I don't care who she fucks

AND

it's really pissing me off

One of two situations are transpiring, and neither are "good" or "bad" or "beta" vs. "alpha", they just ARE:

  1. You're not really over her completely, and this is clouding your judgment

  2. Your friends are going about this in a way you feel isn't OK from friends

TRP and sexual strategy may be amoral, but that doesn't mean you the person are. It's not as simple as "FUCK THESE GUYS YOUR FRIENDS ARE TOXIC SEVER IMMEDIATELY."

That's reddit relationship sub tier advice because it doesn't consider the alternative - and the hive mind always upvotes binary black and white thinking. That type of terrible advice is why TRP exists in the first place.


Now here's where the beauty of being a man comes in - you get to choose for yourself! I can't tell you based on this thread whether or not your friends did something worth punishing, or whether you are letting your male hamster run wild. It's just not possible.

What I CAN tell you is that there is a clear conflict or cognitive dissonance between the things you DID choose to tell us here at askTRP and what I identified up top, so it's worth asking

"Am I being sensitive?"

Don't listen to the hive mind that resoundingly says "NO" and nuke some friends without considering it.


My Personal Perspective

When I demote to plate or otherwise release a girl into the wild, she's fair game. I genuinely don't care how soon or how close to me the next guy is. This social circle game will get WAYYYY more acceptable as you age (I see you are college-aged).

I'll admit that when I was 18-24 I would probably have posted this same thread. BUT - you may have a chance to learn early that you actually didn't truly demote your LTR to plate, and you can learn from that experience in a very positive way without sacrificing friends.

Flip side - if you genuinely believe some of them acted out of turn, confront them privately and make your case. The way they respond will tell you whether they are worth keeping or not. These are "fireable offenses":

  • Bro, it's not a big deal

  • She was totally coming onto me man! It's been a thing for awhile....

Just about anything else, ESPECIALLY AT THIS AGE, can very well be an honest mistake. If they deliberately brush you off when you've made it clear it matters to you, they don't care about you. Worse, if they justify it via a branch swing, they are snakes. Anything else - benefit of the doubt is probably in play.

Good luck out there!

[–]Andorli12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is how TRP replies always should be. Great insight. Thank you for keeping asktrp from thinking lower than it already is.

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

And like the philosophers of old, the EC overrides the vicious bleeping of the sheep to lay knowledge on the OP.

[–]Endorsed ContributorHeathcliff--12 points13 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Like a true gamma male, needing a whole essay to state a simple opinion.

I wouldn't fuck my friends exes, even if they were 11s. Close male friendships take priority over any pussy. He knows that she will be hopping on new cock, what he doesn't want is the new cock to be the guys he grew up with and goes out drinking with. Women will be women, he can't blame her for that, but that's not who he's mad at. It's the dudes that are to blame here. Men should act like men, not desperate vultures, especially alleged "friends".

Dude is fine to be pissed at his loser friends, I would too. And so would you in the same situation, despite all your "redpiller-than-thou" bragging.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

He's got a point here man. Friends (not your day-1s, but just friends) come and go, but disrespect like them pretending everything is cool between you guys while violating trust and trying to dog your ex biddy like a buncha disloyal cocksuckers is inexcusable. Let me say this: It is NEVER an honest mistake. It is an insult to my intelligence to assume that the company I keep make "honest mistakes" of that nature. It would mean I am a naive fool who needs better judgement of who I call "friend".

Honestly, I would try to pick a fight and beat the shit out of em just for being a bunch of thirsty losers with painfully scarce mentalities. I USED TO ASSOCIATE WITH YOU GUYS, WHAT THE FUCK WAS I ON. But maybe that's just me.

[–]LordMarkStark0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I think you're stuck on writing styles. He's not gamma for writing a lot. Trying to keep up appearances? Sometimes a line can be enough, but OP had a complex personal issue. Its needs some lines. He just expounded upon some things in the reply to OP.

Posts like OP's are always concerning because they in fact do not state too much. No one here can know the full situation.

My view is its about trust. The rules and games and all that crap go round that, not the other way round. It will only be solved when the OP trusts himself more and stops controlling people.

All the bullshit about red pill and being alpha and not being possessive is just icing. I think OP has FOMO, gets guilty of that, when some friends ex comes at him he feels the guilt. Its all so wrong.

This is just a consequence. Now OP wants to solve other people, but he needs to look at himself. Is there a red pill way to trust? No there's not. There's only trust.

He needs to call them out too, though. He needs to control his own life. He should be saying 'look dude I see you doing x, well we're still fucking you thirsty maniac and I've only been gone a little bit and here you are on facebook!! So I don't know what you think you want to do, but take this into account and don't be surprised when I am there and get pissed off at you for turning up" contrived, but the gist is there. He would not want to over use this, and its merely a rear guard action because of his lack of control of his own life in the first place.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

It's not a competition. There is the amoral stance and the moral stance. That's not up for debate. Fine if you feel differently, but it's still moralizing. My friends don't care on the proviso it wasn't that serious, and nobody sneaks around in the social circle.

Have you overcome your ennui?

[–]ChadTheWaiter1000 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Agreed heath. This is why I FW you.

[–]ChadTheWaiter100-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Glad to see you back heath. I wrote you a DM

[–]Deadlybeef11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You can't simultaneously believe these two things:

> I'm fully expecting her to find somebody else soon / I don't care who she fucks

AND

> it's really pissing me off

Unless, of course, he is not pissed about his ex finding someone new, but rather his friends going after his scraps. It's his friends who pisses him off, not his ex, neither her new chad.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Coming in late but: great post man.

[–]urfavoritecrayon-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This guy wisdoms ^ great advice ...

[–]HurricaneHugues-4 points-3 points  (19 children) | Copy Link

You got a lot of time to waste on people my guy.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten7 points8 points  (18 children) | Copy Link

That's your all time top comment. My correction is just another 15 minutes.

The votes don't matter.

[–]Endorsed ContributorFereallyRed13 points14 points  (16 children) | Copy Link

The votes matter because it's stark and disappointing just how many readers here are not living redpill, they're just LARPing redpill.

Put yourself first. Believing friends have your back when the shit truly hits the fan is just like believing in your NAWALT unicorn.

Feels are not greater than reals. We all wade though the shit alone when it comes down to it.

Bluepill dreaming.

Don't hate a woman for doing woman things, don't hate a man for doing man things.

[–]Endorsed Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil4 points5 points  (12 children) | Copy Link

The only thing that puts an end to Larping is a brutal spergathon (temp)banathon

[–]Endorsed ContributorFereallyRed2 points3 points  (11 children) | Copy Link

Not a bad band name.

"Brutal Spergathon Banathon!"

[–]Endorsed Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil3 points4 points  (10 children) | Copy Link

That Feel after a banathon

[–]ChadTheWaiter1000 points1 point  (9 children) | Copy Link

Oh great GLOseph? What would you do in this situation? If you broke up with your LTR and your loser friends went after her immediatiely? Behind your back, yet you catch wind of it? What would you do oh mighty one? Would you grow a longer beard or what?

[–]reddit309 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy Link

what does larping red pill mean

[–]Endorsed ContributorFereallyRed3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Live Action Role Playing.

You know when nerds go put on costumes and become a character out in the woods, hitting each other with foam swords?

Pretending.

Putting on a redpill costume because they like the way it makes them feel. But then taking it off when it's inconvenient and going back to their bluepill life.

[–]HurricaneHugues0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Big facts

[–]VigilantSmartbomb14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I didn’t even realize how savage until I read this lmfaooo I was just like yeah that sounds like yeah do that 😂😂😂😂

[–][deleted] 20 points21 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Haha go on lad.

[–]RoyMunson121714 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This 100%

[–]Endorsed Contributormonsieurhire244 points45 points  (22 children) | Copy Link

On the one hand, yes.

On the other hand, HE told her HE wanted to take a break, so he basically told her to go fuck other guys.

Since quality seems to be in short supply, what are people supposed to do? Relegate her to nun status? They are all thinking, "If I don't, someone else will," and "Well, if he doesn't want her anymore, one man's trash...."

Now, in my opinion, if they were trying to break them up, hitting on her on the sly, or if she had dumped him, and then they were waiting to pounce, that would be closer to boundary crossing. But this guy basically has so much abundance, or thinks he has so much abundance, that he feels perfectly comfortable releasing an LTR into the wild. But to expect nobody to be interested in her in his social circle, is completely unrealistic. We all know there is a preselection and inside sales component to dating, so naturally, guys that already know her will be interested. They are all probably wonder what the fuck OP was thinking in dumping her.

So, yeah, now that she's gone, OP's possessiveness instincts are kicking in, and he's wanting to reclaim what he thinks is his property, but as we all know by now, nobody really belongs to anybody. Publicly ending a relationship invites new suitors.

Of course, one could say that the friends don't have enough abundance mentality, but we don't know the region. In some places, quality women are in short supply.

[–]ReformSociety6 points7 points  (13 children) | Copy Link

And this, gents, is why I read every EC comment thoroughly.

[–]Endorsed ContributorFereallyRed6 points7 points  (11 children) | Copy Link

It's not about the "friends".

[–]ReformSociety2 points3 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

Hmm?

[–]Endorsed ContributorFereallyRed19 points20 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

It's about OP's unresolved feelings about the girl.

Everything else is just self deflection and ego rationalization.

That's why there's such a visceral reaction to the surface distraction of the friends being bad friends by the guys here that are still unplugging. They can't dig any deeper and get all emotional about loyalty and bro code.

That's not what OP's post is about, even though he himself doesn't realize it either.

Focusing on the finger, not what the finger is pointing at.

[–]Endorsed Contributormonsieurhire210 points11 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Yep, you are definitely right. OP is only human, and it's perfectly naturally to feel the way he does. It always amuses me that people think they can just magically apply words to control situations that operate with language made up of chemicals linked to emotions, bonding, sensations, etc. I mean, it's like the FWB people saying "We are just friends" with words, but the act of sex says "We are MORE than friends."

[–]growingstronk6 points7 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I absolutely don’t understand your mindset. I don’t trust anyone willing to fuck an exLTR to be a “friend.” That’s not your boy. He never considered you in the equation. The only time I’ve ever actually considered fucking someone’s ex is when I realize I don’t actually care about that person all that much. For my real ride-or-dies, the thought just makes me want to vomit. What, you can’t find ONE other pussy to hibernate in for the winter?

He’s just a desperate loser who can’t find a single other girl. He’s a beta, he doesn’t really view you as a friend, and he should be demoted to “person you use to achieve ends” and nothing more.

[–]Endorsed Contributormonsieurhire22 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Well, of course it's going to suck emotionally for most people in OP's situation, unless they have complete mastery of their emotions, or are 'Spergs or whatever.

I mean, he got sick of her, wanted a break, but suddenly is mad that his buddies want a piece of the action. Their demand for her is probably making him reevaluate his decision to take a break. Why is there demand? It might be that they live in a relatively underpopulated area, and women who are high quality are in short supply. It could be that most of the quality women are locked down. I mean, if it were NYC, it would be easy for the bros to keep their distance. Another possibility is that OP is the alpha leader of a bunch of betas who are envious of his abundance, and are now capitalizing on his largesse. But I mean, guys are basically indoctrinated into being sluts and viewing it as virtuous. A guy who fucks a lot of women is a "stud" because it's "hard." Well, if you are a desirable guy, meaning you have wealth, youth, status, looks, talent, etc., women throw themselves at you, just like men throw themselves at reasonably attractive women. So the studs are just going out and enjoying what they can get with no thought to the consequences. I mean, I've heard of guys who do all sorts of crazy psycho things: weighing the girl on weekly basis, dumping girls over some trivial flaw, etc. etc. Most guys, though, aren't studs. Occasionally though, they got opportunities to experience free sex... like after a break-up. So, you have a bunch of guys, probably betas, and maybe in a scarcity situation, who see an opportunity. As an example, I knew this really pretty girl, where when the relationship with the fiance was on the rocks, because of their mutual idiocy, all of these guys came out of the woodwork to fuck her. I was going through a breakup myself, but when I saw what a mess she was, I had no interest. She was even crazier than the ex. But when she was telling me how she was fucking this guy and that guy, including her neighbor, it was clear to me that all of these guys had wanted to fuck her, and were now seizing the opportunity, knowing they might not get another one. Ultimately, it all comes back to the drive to reproduce, which is hardwired into our biology, or at least for most of us. It's not about, "I want to fuck the hot girl," it's "I want to fuck the hot girl" is a trick our mind plays on us to reproduce the species.

People are so fucking cavalier with each other, like youth isn't a perishable commodity, especially for women. What the fuck is she supposed to do? Be his own personal, private, on-demand compensation-less whore, but only when he feels like it, and then go back on the shelf and be chaste, hoping he ends up picking her? She has to do what is in her own best self-interest, or what she perceives it to be. She's going to want to try and lock down a guy. She was probably running the long con on OP, hoping he'd pick her if she gave him enough free samples. I mean, it's no longer fashionable to demand a ring before putting out. It's perceived as extortionate. But so many women get played by LTRs that fizzle out over time. They guy pretends like he'll be there for the long haul, but then he loses the feels and moves on.

[–]1Terminal-Psychosis1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

If OP was really over her, this post would not exist.

The friends are fucking a single girl, that OP happens to use to be fucking. This is not a big deal at all.

It just shows that OP has oneitis on this girl and needs to really look at that.

If they were trying to fuck an active, exclusive girlfriend, then it's a different thing, but his friends are just going for a single girl.

He’s just a desperate loser who can’t find a single other girl. He’s a beta, he doesn’t really view you as a friend, and he should be demoted to “person you use to achieve ends” and nothing more.

Here, if anything, you're describing OP, and yourself. The "desperate loser" is the one that's all butt hurt at someone else fucking one of his exes.

You're the beta, bub. An alpha would have offered her to the friend that most needed / had most interest. Just hand him the leach and tell her "you're his now".

Or, is it because you're a desperate loser who can't find a single other girl?

[–]juliusstreicher0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes, but, his kicking her to the curb shows that he has no relationship rights.

[–]ReformSociety2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Yes, I agree. You're preaching to the choir.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

No, the choir is "YOUR FRIENDS ARE FUCKIN SNAKES EVERYONE ELSE IS A FAGGOT".

This is the significantly less hive-mind friendly critical thinking section.

[–]ReformSociety0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I meant the choir is me.

[–]LordMarkStark0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Its not just that, OP has been very stupid in some manner. A sensible response in that light is going to be seen by naive people as incredible - when really its just common man-sense.

[–]Red-Lantern3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Best response itt

[–]HurricaneHugues0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy Link

I kid u not my guy, I didn't read past your first sentence. Not gonna waste my time with your nonsense. Have fun being surrounded by weak men and vultures.

[–]Endorsed Contributormonsieurhire21 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Eh, most men are just that, given the right situation. If you were on a desert island, and Chad Thundercock got bored with one of his harem women, and cast her aside, you'd better believe you'd be all over it, assuming it was your best option, meaning you any attempts to kill Chad would likely result in your own demise.

OP never provided details on how plentiful or scarce quality women are. If they are ALL interested in her, it's probably a scarcity situation AND/OR they are beta.

In any case, he doesn't want her, he set her free. She's nothing more than a plate to him. It's not like they were trying to get her to cheat. He dumped her, and how he uses her like a whore, which he was doing the whole time, in any case.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

I legitimately don't understand your comment. I don't understand this either:

" If you were on a desert island, and Chad Thundercock got bored with one of his harem women, and cast her aside, you'd better believe you'd be all over it, assuming it was your best option, meaning you any attempts to kill Chad would likely result in your own demise."

Wut?

Furthermore, if most of your male friends are weak and vulture-like, I honestly question what is going on with your social circle.

I want to understand what you are saying. You have to make sense, you are an EC correct?

[–]Endorsed Contributormonsieurhire21 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Well, OP didn't provide enough context.

In some areas, quality women are scarcer than what is already a scarcity situation for most men.

I mean, guys lust after women aged 18-30, generally. So, that creates scarcity. And she has to be attractive. More scarcity.

So, really, you have a whole bunch of guys chasing after quality women.

But high value men are pretty scarce too. Maybe even scarcer than attractive women. I mean, a guy can be wealthy, but still gross looking and acting. An example would be this 300 lb guy who died recently at age 48, who had to pay a prostitute millions to have sex with him. A high value man is like an attractive women, except rich, powerful, and talented. Most guys are middling in many ways.

So, we don't know OP's context. It could be Alaska, where there are not that many women to begin with. Or North Dakota.

So, if he is relatively high status, or red-pilled, and is spinning plates, and all of his friends are blue-pilled, or of middling status, and he VOLUNTARILY lets go of an LTR, of course these guys are going to be interested. I mean, they are witnessing a high quality woman being released out into the market. She didn't cheat on him. She didn't dump him. She didn't act psycho. She still comes back to him and gives him free sex. Instead, he got bored with her, and demoted her. So, why would they be inhibited about going after her when she didn't do anything wrong?

The OP is totally unrealistic in his expectations. He has probably had them raised due to being in the relatively unusual situation of being a redpilled guy who is essentially treated like a king, in that he has a harem. Back in the old days, you had to be rich to have a harem. You had to be able to hire an army of eunuchs to guard your captive women. Today, women voluntarily form free harems for guys they perceive as high value, some for the feels, and some because they hope to be the primary, or the exclusive one.

So anyway, he's upset that an LTR he demoted out of boredom, is now being made offers because she is perceived as being free and out back in the market again. Obviously she's attractive or else she wouldn't be getting all these offers.

I mean, the guy relinquished his claim on her. He never even really had a claim. LTR? Give me a break. A legal marriage and a ring don't even mean jack shit anymore. You're "enslaving" and "controlling" her if you think you can DEMAND fidelity from her! Lol. So what's an "LTR" worth? Less than zero. And a plate "status?" Even less than that.

Also, I never asked for EC. I don't expect to agree with all ECs, nor do I expect them to agree with me. Also, I don't buy into every TRP doctrine unquestioningly. I don't believe the other ECs or higher-ups do either. It's just that people are so fucking brainwashed by society, they need to be bitch-slapped a bit, ideologically.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

I agree with you. Thanks for taking the time to respond.

[–]Endorsed Contributormonsieurhire21 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

No problemo.

[–]WiseGene0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Damn, this is on point.

[–]jackandjill224 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

He should blast that Drake song with that line

"Like every other thing in my life, you can have it when I'm finished"

Edit: Real 6 God.

[–]bruiser1811 points12 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

And that’s that. Everyone else on this thread is a fucking faggot. Your friends have no respect for you, remove any investment in such friendships.

[–]HurricaneHugues6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The respect for OP is not even the worst part. The worst part is the lack of respect for themselves. Never allow weak and spineless men into your circle. They're only liabilities and a very poor reflection of who you are.

[–]1Terminal-Psychosis1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Anyone getting all totally butthurt at me fucking a girl he kicked to the curb...

is a total loser and not worthy of my friendship.

Have some respect for YOURSELF.

[–]TimmybowTie0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Brother. Sometimes its not what is done, but how its done.

Your friend might drive your car the day after you suddenly died. It could be done in a way that shows he cared for you, or that he never did. OP is upset because he is realizing all his friends are the Scar to his Mufasa.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten-1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

You are a "getting there" poster and should know better than this.

[–]growingstronk0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Swallowing the red pill is no excuse to allow spineless men into your friend circle. Yes you released her into the wild, but any friend would have at least taken your opinions into consideration before trying to take scraps.

If they don’t do that, they don’t truly value you.

Now I’m not saying get rid of them. But use them as necessary. They don’t deserve friendship.

[–]1Terminal-Psychosis1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

bullshit. the weakness here is with the one that broke up with her, not anyone else in the LONG line of future partners that she chooses.

[–]addwater2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

But even this is reactive, Petty and attention seeking.

The best revenge is living well.

The fact you're here posting / caring means you've lost.

The only way to win this game is to not play.

[–]TimmybowTie0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

No one can disagree. Big whoop. You can say what u say about anything though, including your own line, and my line here.

You are right but thats too meta.

[–]FrgElder 1 points [recovered]  (3 children) | Copy Link

Vultures is a good way to describe them. But it all depends on how close you are as "friends" and the dynamics of the social circle.

The key point here with the vulture distinction is that they are waiting until you're broken up to make a move. If a man wanted to sleep with your girl, they wouldn't wait until you were broken up. They would make their intentions clear or flirt with her beforehand. When guys jump on a piece of pussy that just became single it screams 'scarcity mentality'.

I would never sleep with a good friends ex, and I would never tolerate or keep a friend that tried to sleep with one of mine. If you do, you need stop surrounding yourself with low quality people. There is enough easy tail out there that you don't need to be scrounging around for scraps from your bros. Being eskimo-bros with randoms can be funny, but not with your friends exes. If a close friend of yours makes a pass at your ex, they were never really your friend and you should cut contact with them immediately (for your own well-being).

I will say though that maybe OP is calling people 'friends' that are more just acquaintances from his social group. I have had people in different social circles get mad at me for sleeping with their girlfriends while they were 'on break' or had just broken up. It's not like I even pursue them, they're likely just trying to make their exes jealous (similar to what OP's ex is doing). The guys always give me the "bros before hoes" speech and I just ask them to name a single time we have hung out one on one. If acquaintances are hitting on your girl but they aren't your true friends, they're doing nothing wrong. They may be vultures, but I wouldn't cut contact with someone who holds such little utility in your life anyways. And I wouldn't get mad at them either, that shit just comes off as controlling beta behavior.

[–]blackswan2whiteswan0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

The problem is not them trying to hit on a free range chick, but ALL of them trying to hit IMMEDIATELY. better change them.

[–]RStonePT0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

deleted What is this?

[–]blackswan2whiteswan0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Indeed. Sorry I didn't get the situation from the first time.

[–]kaolin2246 points7 points  (19 children) | Copy Link

This guy is correct.

Your "friends" suck, bru.

Are they all on this sub, too, because this isn't how it's supposed to work.

How old are you, btw, social circles usually weed assholes like this out early.

[–]1Shyrk2 points3 points  (11 children) | Copy Link

Are they all on this sub, too, because this isn’t how it’s supposed to work.

Actually, if they were on this sub, they would know that literally the first tenet of TRP is that sexual strategy is amoral. i.e. the friends don’t owe him shit.

TRP is about how to fuck and how to improve yourself. Leave your “bro code” at the door.

[–]kaolin2246 points7 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

There's nothing Red Pill about being led around by your dick's thirst so badly you're willing to screw over your fellow man, especially if you're supposed to be friends.

Those are signs of weakness and you're a parasite who has no fucking idea what TRP is actually about if you think it's all about "how to fuck and how to improve yourself".

Enjoy the sloppy seconds, pseudo-Chad, you da man!

[–]1Terminal-Psychosis2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Nobody got screwed over here in the least.

He broke up with her. She will fuck anyone she wants (and would have when they were together even).

Getting upset about that just shows internal weakness. He's still into her, but let her go, but is into her.

Lame. The friends fucking this slut have nothing to be ashamed of.

The OP (and a lot of other moralizing concern trolls here) have to do some internal inventory. Stop expecting people to baby-proof the world for you.

[–]TimmybowTie0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yo if its all supposed to be amoral, why the f you defending yourself with 'He broke up with her.' It shouldnt even matter right? Even if she was his wife, or his daughter, or his pet dog. Obviously there are some boundries you tread them lightly not just because 'He's my friend' but its in your own best interest not to put your sexual desire as your primary goal short term. If it was, then why not start raping bitches?

You big doofus.

[–]kaolin224-1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Again, this has nothing to do with him or his ex, but rather the guys who were supposedly his "friends" sniffing after her pussy immediately after they broke up.

He called it off, and if he still has the feels, that's on him. But if you think there's something 'alpha' or TRP about going after your buddy's ex, you're pathetic.

There are millions of hot women out there. Millions. She's going to do what she's going to do, but why is that your story?

The only thing this proves is that you're a fake Chad pretending to be friends with a dude because of his woman. You liked her, but it wasn't reciprocal. Yet you still hung around like you had zero options.

"I'll swoop in when the time is right and profess my undying love and devotion! She will eventually see my quality! "

Not only that, but you've been in the Friendzone the entire time waiting for your shot with the rest of the losers' bracket for years! Years! Are you one of those dickheads that hits on a taken woman when her boyfriend walks away to take a piss?

Sounds like a serious case of one-itis you're trying to pass off as being woke.

They're talking about you, and laughing at your stupid ass before she hops on his dick for a ride.

You are the satellite she'll latch onto when things aren't so hot. You're the fire sale, must liquidate bargain bin dick that's always in the glass case - just in case.

And you're bragging about it, you fucking idiots.

You know what really commands respect?

Landing a woman outside of the circle that's younger and hotter than the rest, without the help of anyone else.

Sniffing after a recently next'd woman shows you have zero honor, or game.

[–]1Terminal-Psychosis0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

But if you think there's something 'alpha' or TRP about going after your buddy's ex, you're pathetic.

No, it is simply a complete non-issue.

If you think there's something "beta" about it, heh, that's really funny. He wasn't her boyfriend.

She's available. You think you have claim to a girl's pussy after you break up with her?

How long does that ownership last, before you won't cry when she fucks someone else?

You are the satellite she'll latch onto when things aren't so hot. You're the fire sale, must liquidate bargain bin dick that's always in the glass case - just in case.

wtf? You're describing the butthurt ex-boyfriend if anything. You know, the one that broke up with her.

Nobody's bragging about anything, just pointing out that he's still very attached to be so butthurt.

LOL honor. Fuck right off with your moralizing concern troll.

And again, nobody owes you a baby-proof world. You break up with a girl, she's on the market again.

You don't like that, the problem is yours, nobody else's.

Being butthurt about this shows you don't have any balls. Has nothing to do with any of the ridiculous belief based, manipulative moral crap you're spewing here.

[–]kaolin2240 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lmao... it sounds like you have a personal stake in this. Is this how you got your current girlfriend?

Prior to getting her I'll bet the entire time you were helping her move; running errands for her; listening to her problems; or doing otherwise bitch-boy stuff to get in her good graces. Was she crying on your shoulder when she and the ex were having problems?

Now that she's single, it's time to cash in those points you've been building up for years.

If that's your path to land low-hanging pussy, then sure, convince yourself that them being together for a while (one of them being your friend) is a non issue and this is just what happens. Congrats on being the latest cock carousel she gets to ride on.

Don't forget: when she starts talking shit about her ex the first time you bang her (about how small his dick is, and how much better you are at fucking), you're not the first one to hear that story. And you'll be in the next one.

This entire time were you so enamored with another dude's woman that you couldn't land your own and instead waited in the wings until it was your time to swoop in?

Alpha as fuck, bro. Own that shit.

How's your friend's dick taste?

[–]1Shyrk-5 points-4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Tell me more about how the sidebar is wrong, please.

[–]growingstronk-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Friends who aren’t there for you aren’t friends you faggot.

[–]bruiser18-1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Yeah it’s amoral, but you’re just spineless and have no value for friendship to go for your friends fresh broken up with ex.

[–]1Terminal-Psychosis3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

False. The spineless one is the one so weak they get upset about this.

If he was really over her, he'd have offered her to a friend himself. That would be strength.

Nobody owes you a baby-proof world. Grow up.

[–]rus93841 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Spineless? It's all about what friends give in return. If they gave nothing and actually just orbitered your GF, then you should break up that "friendship".

It's completely understandable if they are attracted to his ex. If they actually have something to give in return, that's not a bad friendship.

[–]VigilantSmartbomb-2 points-1 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

Bros before hoes right?

[–]rus93841 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

No, now this is what girls adopt:

"Girlfriends before bastards".

Gender roles have been swapped.

[–]VigilantSmartbomb0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy Link

I’m just confused cause I like being around females or other dudes who are making moves with their lives. I don’t like to just kick it with dude s usually. What’s trp on that?

[–]rus93840 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

Originally, TRP is only about mating strategies. Whether to prefer girls' or dudes' company is not within TRP whatever folks will tell you. It's not really about mating.

[–]VigilantSmartbomb0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

How is your social circle and your place in that social dominance hierarchy not complacent with mating strategies? They’re one in the same man lol— in our world of the mating game, what role do same sex friends play? Is really what I’m asking I guess

[–]rus93841 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I would not say it affects mating very much. IME the most successful people prefer the company of girls.

Same sex can play an important role in mating, you can be a contextual alpha, but having friends is more like a separate goal rather than a sexual strategy.

[–]VigilantSmartbomb0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I mean I feel it, it’s just if I’m in a circle of winners, isn’t that going to increase my smv status? I prefer the company of girls and most of my guys friends consider my aloof but it’s like I don’t wanna sit there and smoke weed and play video games with dudes who are slackin cause that makes me slack and girls notice that I feel like lol

Like if you’re alpha among alphas what’s that make you? More desirable imo

I look for the top dawg females and a female that knows how to control her group really excites me idk lmao so I’d imagine the same going the opposite way is all 🤔🤔

[–]Nighthawkdragon84 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

You don't need to ditch your friends over it. 98 percent of people who do not know game are creepy opportunistic vultures. Still, don't trust them fully again after they hit on her.

[–]HurricaneHugues5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

When people show me who they are, I believe them. That's the difference between you and me.

[–]Nighthawkdragon82 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Cant argue with that

[–]Xkirbyx1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This mans doing the lords work with this reply 😂

[–]the_knifeofdunwall1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Amen to this. Your bro's dont chirpse your cast offs. These guys aren't your friends.

[–]HurricaneHugues1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I can't even think of any situation where I would go after the ex of a friend. Not that I keep close friends around me anyway. It's just a natural course of action for me. They had a thing, and I respect myself enough not to dig in my boy's trash. That's just weak.

[–]ayylma0880 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Holy lord ... that sounds epic

[–]Flintblood0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I wouldn’t consider them true friends anymore. I would at most consider them fair weather acquaintances.

[–]goldenshoelace80 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

If i a had gold i would give it to you, this comment is on point

[–]jollycompanion0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

This OP,m this is the definition of based and red-pilled.

[–]failingtheturingtest-5 points-4 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Don't kusten to those phaggots. Now here's how you can get pictures of your nut in your bros mouth.

Just go back to your gay erotica websites and leave the advice to the adults.

[–]HurricaneHugues2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

That's not my bro if he's sneaking behind my back to get with a girl I recently seperated with. That "friendship" or what I thought wss friendship is done. He's just a bitch I'm steam rolling over at this point, with all disrespect.

[–]rus93840 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

How are you sure their initial goal actually was to fuck his GF? This is unbelievable and most likely guys simply wanted to get an advantage of unexpected situation.

[–]HurricaneHugues0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Youre right, they didn't want to fuck her. They just wanted to buy her ice cream, do her homework, and paint her nails.

[–]rus93840 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Meh, if they are her orbiters from the start, you should've not be surprised in that. And fuck, there are orbiters who paint girls' nails? That's self-derogatory.

[–]VigilantSmartbomb-5 points-4 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

And because I don’t think it’s been stressed enough yet. Fuck those people they aren’t your friends lol. Boss up bruh, time for some new friends.

[–]HurricaneHugues2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Big facts

[–]rus93841 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lol, you are getting downvoted for agreeing with the most downvoted response. People's logic is insane.

[–]rus9384-2 points-1 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Whether or not they are friends is determined not by how willing are they to fuck his ex. The majority of people I got acquainted with were not friendship material.

Friendship is determined by willingness to have good relationships with people, that is, having a fun time in a good moment and helping each other in a bad moment.

The reasonable strategy is exactly to try to fuck her ASAP, because if not you then somebody else will do that. What I see from this post is that apparently OP's ex is hot.

If these people never were willing to help to OP and in general were just buddies to drink with, thdn they are not real friends. But that has little to do with them being vultures.

P.S. I'm almost sure girls you kissed also had been nutted into the mouth by other guys.

[–]HurricaneHugues0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

If vultures and weak men are the company you keep, good for you. Just stay the fuck out of my way.

[–]rus93840 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

You don't know what company I keep. Good luck Going Your Own Way.

[–]Lorddevonshire121 points122 points  (16 children) | Copy Link

When it comes to money and women, you find out that loyal friends are rare or non existent.

[–]SoulRedemption30 points31 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

This.

Piggy backing on this. I have been rich. i have been broke. Different stages of my life. But it opened my eyes, not to the bad ones, but the gud ones.

The friends that drops by with a couple of ciggies to have a chat over a tea because I didnt have money.

The friends that come over with a bottle and all because I was going through a shitty time but knew I couldnt afford it and could do with a drink.

The friends that gave me money to help make my ultimate day of losing my virginty to an LTR very sepcial (hindsight fucken 20-20).

Some friendships are decades old. We have had our differences. But there are people who just truly are good friends. Try not to do them wrong intentionally when you find or know someone.

Edit: also just because they are good friends it dun mean they wont do you wrong. Learn to weigh the wrong doing. Same goes for you.

[–]TopOccasion292 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Agreed. You'll know your true friends during hard times. Out of everyone i know i only have 2 best friends who despite our fundamental differences we still look out for each other and help during hard times.

[–]EvolvedVirus1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It's energy expenditure, men are more likely to be your good friend because they have energy to spend. Women are showered in attention, they won't. But also if you had a high value friend who is also showered in attention or is desperately trying to become more successful, he only has so much energy to spend and likely may ditch the ones that fall on hard times or whatever.

It's dishonorable, but it's a bit of energy expenditure.

Imagine if you had 4 friends, who all fell on bad times, are you going to spend energy on all 4 of them to help them? If you can do it, then you are a very good friend and have a lot of energy to spend.

Get depressed or lose your job or have other issues, and you quickly find out who your most honorable friends are and/or who has energy to spend to help you.

Now, if you have a friend who is rich (with lots of energy and money to spend) and he ditches you when you fall on hard times or if after you have helped him so much... That is a much higher level of dishonor. That ... is a parasite.

Self-sufficiency is not only an important national-security principle but an important principle that all men should learn, because we all die alone.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten5 points6 points  (11 children) | Copy Link

It's not about the friends.

This is OP's unresolved residual feelings for his LTR (that he probably was not ready to plate, but that is OK because it will be a good learning experience).

[–]Senior EndorsedVasiliyZaitzev10 points11 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

Except it kinda is. Not in the "Et tu Brute" way - because the Thirst is REAL - but you want bros who you can count on, and the OP has now realized that there is a flaw in his vetting process. It's nice to have friends but fewer, and better quality, should be the goal.

[–]judethedude0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thanks for chiming in Vasiliy, this is a nuanced question that I think we can all identify with. Personally I've been on both ends and it weighed on me when I was being vulture-like...the thirst is real.

[–]rus9384-1 points0 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

If anything, it seems RP men say having RP friends is bad. I like how RP defeats itself nowadays.

[–]Senior EndorsedVasiliyZaitzev3 points4 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Nah, having bluepill white knight/betafag/Nice GuyTM friends who will through you under the bus the second they get even a whiff of pussy is bad. Having RP guys you can roll with - provided they're legit - is what you want.

[–]Endorsed ContributorNightwingTRP3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

This. I've said for years the hardest part of becoming a red pill man is not picking up chicks. It's finding good quality male-male friendships. Society has become so feminised that male intrasexual competition has become more like female intrasexual competition. Instead of rising above or building bigger and better with your friends, these numale "friends" will happily tear you down in exchange just a whiff of pussy, they don't even have to actually get some pussy.

OP needs better friends who do not have scarcity mentality. He also needs to figure himself out and what he's currently looking for because he appears to have attached to a woman he doesn't consider LTR material. That was a bad move.

[–]PimPedOutGeese0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Wow... A lot of truth here man.

[–]rus93841 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I know, but I don't see how having attraction and action towards OPs ex is being a vulture. I can spin plates and still be attracted to his ex. The most important point is that if ex is open for relationships/sex, why would I reject her if I am attracted to her?

I might reject her only to not hurt friends' feelings, but if so, the problem is that they still have feelings towards their exes.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Agree, but I'm never willing to take asktrp on face value. I'm not and never would say "it's not them it's you". When I say it's not about the friends, I mean "the controversy in question isn't about the friends, it's about how OP is approaching the friends".

His question was, "am I being too sensitive" not "I know my friends are dicks. Now what?"

[–]Senior EndorsedVasiliyZaitzev1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

He shouldn't be busted up about what his ex does with her pussy. I would not be surprised if she is flirting with/fucking his friends out of "revenge". That said, he probably needs some new friends, also.

[–]TimmybowTie1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

ITS NOT ABOUT HIS EX.

This is Mufasa hanging on the edge of the cliff, Thank God you are here Scar! Help your big bro up! and all his scar friends who've been secretly resentful and jealous of his position, singing Jesse's Girl in the shower, finally show their true colors.

This post wouldn't have happened if his friends checked in with him first, to see how he felt, then chased her. No. Immediately they try her behind his back. Like, if you not a filthy scumbag vulture beta, then why are you trying to hide what you doing? Why you dont want people to see? I guarantee you OP only knows whats going on is because his EX is the one telling him. Matter of fact maybe we all got this wrong. Maybe the Ex is super exaggerating trying to get this OP jealous......I mean...think about it tho. Hos always be instigating shit beacuse they on they feelings.

[–]hammerfan120 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Exactly, if you don't want your friends trying to bang your LTR's, all i can think of is find gay friends.

[–]Helpcalculus33 points34 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

these are my friends

My man, you know what you have to do.

[–]ChadTheWaiter10019 points20 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Well consider this. I’m my blue pill days I had 3 best friends. Literally, every one of my friends girlfriend made an advancement towards me. Some more aggressive than others. I denied them all out of loyalty.

I had a brain injury and was hospitalized. 2 of the 3 friends fucked my girlfriend while I was in the hospital.

That was my natural red pill.

[–]ttkkk7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Hard one

[–]HurricaneHugues0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Keep your grass cut and there won't be snakes in your garden

[–]ChadTheWaiter1007 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This was 8 years ago. I don’t have a yard anymore just a driveway.

[–]Endorsed Contributorleftajar38 points39 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Fire all your "friends." They're no-morals-having loser pieces of shit.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten-4 points-3 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Uhhh.... This is textbook moralizing. The measured RP approach is

"she's single so she fucks who she wants and men will fuck her, but decide if YOU think they actually did something shady and act accordingly. Beware the male hamster telling you it's, "wrong" when in fact you might just have residual feelings. "

[–]Endorsed Contributorleftajar16 points17 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

You have to have friends, man. Most of us aren't sociopaths, even if the advice is to mimic one.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I don't disagree with you, but that's not what we're talking about.

OP asked for advice - we're not #believeallmen here at askTRP. This post isn't really a question about his friends' behavior - we can't answer that!

It is about his unresolved feelings for his LTR that he probably wasn't ready to plate. He is college-aged so I would have felt the same way, but to join the hivemind and not offer a chance for him to learn WHY he feels this way and WHAT his options are is selling him short.

[–]Endorsed Contributorleftajar5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I mean, look -- you're not wrong. There's some aspect of the LTR situation that remains tangled here.

That does need to be resolved. That being said, I would consider the lack of true friends to be a deeper and more pressing issue. With a good cadre of male friends, a guy can weather a lot. But if they're all backstabbing, pussy-hungry fake friends, then he's all alone.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm wordy so I'll condense my point as much as possible

  • We know enough to prove OP has cognitive dissonance about his ex-LTR

  • We don't and can't know enough to determine whether his friends are "real" or "fake"

ipso facto I'll stick to giving advice on #1. Too much extrapolation required to possibly be useful or right about #2

[–]HotHead12134 points35 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

You think these people respect you?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Dude. They don't even respect themselves. You think they give a FUCK about OP? Hell no.

Chasing after another mans table scraps because you saw him leave the table is a low, low point.

[–]HotHead1210 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

It was a retorical question m8

[–]rpsheepdog54 points55 points  (13 children) | Copy Link

I told my LTR I wanted to “take a break

. She still comes over regularly to fuck clean and leave

You sure you're on a break? This reads like you said you're on a break but still feel and act like you're dating

[–][deleted] 55 points56 points  (12 children) | Copy Link

She’s the definition of a plate at this point, I’m fucking three other people regularly and it’s perfectly likely she is too.

My issue isn’t with her, it’s with my friends immediately jumping onto her behind my back within 48 hours

[–]rpsheepdog28 points29 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Okay that makes a little more sense

Sounds like your friends aren't as close as you thought. I mean if you have a hot plate/ex/whatever it's to be understood guys are gonna hit on her, but that is on them for not valuing yalls frienship

[–]OfficerWade13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Fair weather friends. They were with you until the end

[–]Red-Lantern4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

For all intents and purposes it looks like you just made an open relationship. The homies were looking to have fun.

You demoted her which puts her in hoe status. Hoe status = free for all. If your friends respected you while you were in a relationship then all is good. If you had actually broke up, then it would be respectable not to rebound her. You and your boys should have had a dialogue about respect and being real.

Don't love these hoes man.

[–]rus93840 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Don't love these hoes man.

Actually we know Pushkin's remark.

"The less we love her when we woo her, The more we draw a woman in"

This is not only about hoes.

[–]RStonePT7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

deleted What is this?

[–]TimmybowTie0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yo bro. I been thinking. Your friends never approached you about your ex, either respectfully or disrespectfully right? You didnt hear about this from them im thinking. Consider the possibility, right? Your ex is a bigger hobag than you know, she's purposefully leading them on a little bit. Being cute around them, making them betas think they have a chance. Then when beta tries to take the bait, Ms.Hobag comes running to you like 'omg these hooligans be wanting my pussy soo bad. they want my puss soooooo bad, but i told them NO. beacuse its yours daddy' and all this drama is stirring up because this little slut cant control herself.

Like girls learn this shit in middle school. This is elementary for them. Just consider the possibility bro, that she's not ready to lose you, and your post, everything you going through emotionally right now was something designed purposefully by her.

[–]1Scriptopeia16 points17 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

This post is filled with wild monkeys throwing shit at each other. Embarassing.

It really depends on multiple factors of the relationship like lengh and how deep it was.

OP broke up with her. She can do whatever she wants.

There are girls I wouldn't touch, but then there are short lived things that had no deep meaningfull connection behind it. My best friend and I actually both fucked the same girl.

Btw always think for yourself before blindly following advice. Literally seen a 15 y.o virgin giving out advice in this thread.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten8 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Your critical thinking is appreciated.

[–]Yougotredonyouagain1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This post is the best example of the reality behind the "respect the tag" article on the sidebar of the main page.

Go read it, newbies. Comments too.

The tag exists for us, not the EC's.

"Recognizing Quality"

"If you look at any successful organization of males, you will notice a pattern: the men who have the greatest stake in the success of the enterprise shoulder the most responsibility, receive the most respect, and enjoy the greatest benefits as thanks for their contribution."

"Around these parts, these men are known as "endorsed contributors" or ECs."

"The Red Pill operates as a patriarchal meritocracy. Endorsed contributors are community members who, through careful vetting, have been flaired in order to draw attention to the quality of their writing. Whenever you read posts or comments on TRP, it is the voices of these men that you should pay the most attention to - not votes."

[–]ModTheRedPike[M] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Have a point.

[–]Kabuki43151 points52 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

One man's thrash is another mans treasure

[–]bruiser187 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Unfortunate that people respect themselves this little.

[–]failingtheturingtest24 points25 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

This is co pletely normal. Doesn't make it "OK" and it's reasonable to keep this in mind when reconsidering what these "friendships" actually mean.

But you're forgetting a VERY important part of all this.

She is making sure you know about it.

So what you see/hear is a) what she's telling you and b) what happens when you're around. She is 100% baiting these guys behind your back to piss you off. She's manipulating this situation to make you want her back and to defend her.

Sure, they are thirsty blokes that don't deserve your future trust, but she is the manipulative force that is pushing this problem onto you. Accept it for what it is, a temporary good plate with baggage that you need to move on from before you get lumped with the bill.

[–]Yougotredonyouagain2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Hell yes.

[–]boy_named_su24 points25 points  (15 children) | Copy Link

ya, about 6 of my friends fucked my ex after we broke up

i didn't find out until a few years later though, and didn't really care by that point

either way, bad form by your friends. dunno if it's worth dropping them for, but you definitely "owe" them one (after they break up w their exes)

[–]Endorsed Contributormonsieurhire234 points35 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

They fucked her?

More likely, she went to each one of them and fucked them to get back at you. You're giving WAY too much credit to the guys in that case. Like, do you really think that each one independently seduced her with their "skills?" It's more like, she was "free" now, from you, and wanted to sample each one of them, like a greedy pig, and of course to "hurt" you, before finding another LTR.

Most guys don't have the will-power to turn down free sex. I mean, maybe she wasn't hyper-aggressive, it could have just been her making herself available, them following through to "hang out," then one thing leading to another, but since women are definitely the gate-keepers of sex, it was entirely within her control, with herself in the driver's seat.

[–]RuleTheOne14 points15 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

Makes you wonder if introducing your girl to your buddies is a good move

[–]urbanfoh6 points7 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

Thought about this as well. No upside, lots of possible downsides.

So no probably not.

[–]rus93841 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

If she was not fucked by your friends, she'd got fucked by someone else.

In either way, she gets the fucks.

[–]urbanfoh2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

The damage done if she fucked my friends would be indefinitely higher than if she fucked a stranger.

I've seen friendships break apart because of that.

[–]rus93841 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Friendships break apart exactly because these people can't accept the fact that these girls became their exes now and there are no more boundaries for friends to break. Did they disrespect the boundaries when you were in LTR? Apparently, no. If they did, then they actually are not friends.

[–]urbanfoh0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

My story in short:

  • friend B introduced girlfriend to friends group

  • friend A and girlfriend seemed to get along quite well

  • fast forward they fucked

  • resulting in maximum shitstorm

My point is: There is no use in tempting friends/acquaintances to do stupid shit. He got nothing out of introducing his girlfriend to us other than two of three evenings spent together. But his downside was more emotional pain, losing an good acquaintance and looking like a fool.

[–]rus93840 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

These people met and have to get acquainted. If you don't introduce her she introduces herself. If you don't tell she is your GF, people might assume she is not your GF and will try to get her.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

There's no downsides. You find out she's a slut and you find out your friends are pathetic blue-pillers. It's a win-win in my book.

[–]TopOccasion293 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lol you can't hide her forever. One shouldn't be insecure about shit like this. Introduce her to your friends...if she stays loyal cool..if not then you'll know who she really is and you'll act accordingly and dump her and your "friends" who decided to betray you.

[–]HurricaneHugues1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It's neither a bad or a good move. I think it's normal for them to cross paths at some point in your life. What I don't see as necessary is to be in a rush to show off or introduce your girl to your friends. Just live your life. If a situation arises where you, your girl, and your friends are together somewhere, make the introductions. It's just silly to nake it a goal to introduce her to your friends.

I'm not that pleasant with friend's girls for that exact reason. If I have great respects for you, you won't see me exchanging pleasantries with your girl/wife.

[–]omega_dawg936 points7 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

you mad with your friends or the woman who eagerly & willingly GAVE herself to them?

she makes it easy, she's gonna get fucked. the "who got to fuck" doesn't matter... and your friends did you a favor by letting her show ALL OF Y'ALL exactly who she is.

[–]Geleemann6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Takes two to tango. They can say no, but they said yes once she offered.

[–]rus93840 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Please, tell me, why can't people fuck their friends' exes?

[–]Endorsed Contributormonsieurhire21 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yep.

[–]Malactha10 points11 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

It sounds like some of your friends are not true friends. I would never have sex with someone a friend dated. In my opinion it is a common respect for others thing. Others opinions may differ, but my opinion is some of your "friends" have shown there true colors.

[–]rus93842 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah, our opinions differ. That said, I actually am supportive towards my friends, we can have a fun time together, etc. But of course, people choose if a girl costs a friendship. TBH, breaking a friendship because of a girl is like putting a pussy on a pedestal.

Another thing, if you actually have set boundaries, I never break them. Those who break them disrespect you and are not friends.

[–]Hambone_Malone2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Personally I would wait 6 months to a year before making a move on a friend's ex. There's right ways to do things and there's wrong ways.

[–]fartingaround10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Theres no such thing as bro code if ur gf is good looking

[–]TopOccasion2914 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Most men aren't your friends, they're just close acquaintances. They will fuck your girl in a heartbeat if they have the opportunity to. I have no problem sleeping with married women and women in relationships but i will never sleep with the gf or ex of a guy i consider my true friend.

Cut them off and move on. Goodluck

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Dude after my last LTR her "best friend" literally dumped his girlfriend and started fucking her IMMEDIATELY. I thought I was pretty cool with the dude, but apparently he was just waiting for me to be gone lmao.

[–]CainPrice5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

A lot of ex girlfriends will deliberately fuck your friends to try to get back at you.

Instead of looking at this like friends taking advantage of your loss, look at this like you being the benefactor of your friends.

Next time, tell them, "Hey, I'm gonna dump Sarah this week. If you want to get some 'revenge' pussy out of her, start putting the subtle moves on now." Then, high-five your buddies and they can all buy you drinks and let you 'revenge' fuck their exes.

If you really want to stab Sarah in the heart, hang out with her again, she'll let it slip that she hooked up with a friend of yours in a not-so-subtle attempt to try to hurt you or make you jealous, and you can chuckle like you don't care (because you already knew, so she won't surprise you with this news), fuck her again if you want, and send her on her way.

[–]PIGamer8611 points12 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

“I don’t care who she fucks“

Plot twist: you do.

[–]laserdicks6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

This thread is chock full of people who think "ex" is a relationship status. OP claims to be on a break but clearly has a problem with his ex being on a break too.

If you have a problem with friends fucking your ex, she's not an ex.

[–]Endorsed Contributoritiswr1tten2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Succinct and to the point.

[–]Nighthawkdragon84 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Opportunistic approach to women vs abundance approach to women.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I am fucking loving this thread.

Right OP, you can't plate an ex, at least not this early on. I can tell it's too early due to the emotional attachments you have. If you actually say it has been along time etc, then re read the definition of "plate". She gets to fuck others, just like you, including your friends.

The "friends" that you're angry at, well obviously we don't know the group dynamic that you have but for all intents purposes, let's assume you're the alpha of the group. When you are GENUINELY done with a girl, the "2nd in command" has a free pass to fuck her with your approval, because that is the ultimate showcasing of bro's before hoe's. Who means more to you, your friends or the girl?

Now why i love this thread. Whilst the EC's aren't infallible, they got their status due to knowledge and experience. Now, anyone may be able to conjure a couple of good posts, fake a certain level of achievement with women etc, but they would eventually get caught. The EC's however were able to showcase their knowledge on subjects when shit-tested by those within the community time and time again, so why the fuck are "kids" and the "arrogant but struggling with women" guys arguing with the EC's, downvoting facts etc? You're here to learn and helps those who are struggling, not try to be the all-knowing King of the community, regurgitating the NPC comment of the guy above you. The human mind is in a constant battle with itself between logic/morality vs primitive desires, and we all know, the desire to fuck is a motherfucker of an emotion to suppress, so the whole "your friends are vultures, drop them shit"... Well A. learn social power tactics, read Machiavelli to help you learn how to handle people better and B. I will put money on it that you would do the exact same thing if a HB8 or higher ex of a friend came on to you.

You're here to speak honestly, not virtue signal.

[–]sadomasochrist4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

You are learning a valuable life lesson. That 95% of interactions are transactional.

E.g. her pussy is worth more than your friendship to at least 6 of these guys.

What you can also learn from this is that the 5% that wouldn't are the rare true friends that are very, very difficult to find. So the guys that aren't dogging you, pay attention to that.

The ones that are, understand they should be treated the same way. What can you get from them? If nothing, dispose of them.

Truth be told, this is how it is with everything and everyone. Everyone wants something from you. A few people want something from everyone else, but nothing from you.

[–]Rp9970 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

How are the 5% that wouldn’t fuck the girl ‘true’ friends. These are just the guys that have abundance and don’t value the pussy over the friendship. These same guys might value other things over the pussy and fuck you over that ( be it money/ status)

[–]Senior EndorsedVasiliyZaitzev5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I don’t care who she fucks at this point

Good.

but these are my friends

Nah. They are thirsty, no-abundance-having betafags.

This is actually a very well-disguised blessing. Now you know who among your friends is loyal and who are pussy beggars. I wouldn't even begrudge them tryna fuck BUT you also know who doesn't have your back.

Verdict: Keep the cool bros, and shred the assholes.

[–]Thinkingard2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Either your friends were all her beta orbiters and you thought they were your friends or, your friends are damn thirsty. Either way, they sound like losers. OR you are very young and in high school or college, in which case it's annoying but DGAF since you won't be around those guys after graduation anyway.

[–]1Shyrk2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

TRP tenet #1: Sexual strategy is amoral.

Feel how you will about it, these men owe you nothing.

[–]Nergaal2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I am not sure why you care. You downgraded her from LTR to plate. Do you normally care if your "bros" go over to your plates?

[–]juliusstreicher2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You live in a strange world.

First of all, you have no interest in the corporation. You dumped her. Finis. Kaputski. Sayanora. Outta here.

Second, there aint no "Bros before hos." It's like your wanting life to be fair. Sure, it isn't, but, your wistful feelings will not make it fair. Bros are all out for themselves, and if you want to see how strong your friendship is, introduce money or pussy, and watch a lot of strange activity. We are designed that way. The Bro Code is a fantasy. Oh, and those times you denied yourself sex with former partners? Congratulations, she went and fucked someone else.

But it doesnt matter...BECAUSE YOU BROKE UP WITH HER AND ADVERTISED IT TO THE WHOLE FUCKING PLANET!

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Late to the party, but take this as a learning experience. This is interesting because ordinarily on this sub the problem is the opposite - girl fucks around with a mutual friend or something. In that situation, the solution should be obvious to the readership.

This here is one that, as you can see from the responses, can be handled in different ways, but consider it a watershed moment in your understanding of fellow men.

Lots of dudes will pull this stunt to their fucking brother if they could, others just aren't that close friends. And then you'll find ones that wouldn't pull this stunt out of a form of morality.

Without getting to assessing which is "right", it's good you've learned early on that many of your friends, possibly even close friends, don't follow "bros, before hoes" when there is a potential pussy at stake.

[–]UriahTheChosen5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Listen at the end of the day quality friendships are rare. just be grateful that you learned the true nature of your friends sooner rather than later.

[–]antoniofelicemunro4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Bruh your friends don’t respect you. I know for certain none of my friends would hit my girl up if we broke up. You gotta be more diligent about who you let in your circle.

[–]CaptainBW4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Oneitis and hard next. Furthermore, you abide by your own virtues for the sake of it, without expecting others to adhere to your own code of conduct. If you truly didn’t care, you wouldn’t whine about this nonsense on the internet.

[–]Yougotredonyouagain1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Hard to claim abundance when panties get twisted about an ex.

[–]1DubbleFUPAwitCheez4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Your friends can't get any pussy on their own so they have to leech off you it seems. You don't fuck a buddies ex unless you don't care about them. It's just fucked up.

You should take this as a sign that your friends are low value. The reason you didn't take up your friends exes for rebound sex is because you're not desperate and can get your own, you don't need scraps. I'd say take some time to think about that aspect.

[–]Rp99712 points13 points  (10 children) | Copy Link

The bro code is a myth. There is no such thing as the bro code it’s the biggest shit test between guys. Put 10 million dollars between any “bros” and all these social rules will fly out the window. The fact that you’re friends are going after you LTR means one thing; that they value her pussy more than your feelings. It’s that simple. There is nothing ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ with that. If you were dating a Victoria Secret model with 10million IG followers , all your friends would be going after her, regardless how much you think you are “bro” with them.

[–]Popeman7922 points23 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Nah man, some of us actually do have a bro code. I've had the opportunity to fuck amazing girls who were some friends' exes, but I never did, it has always been bros before hoes. With money it's the same.

One day you will find a few guys who are worthy of your absolute respect.

[–]reddit_man6411 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I want to second this. I have good friends that follow bro code. Not many guys like this, but they do exist. They tend to be the less flaky type. The guys that actually do what they say. Dependable. It sounds like you hadn’t totally vetted out these guy friends. It also helps to have lots of experiences with these guys, after a few years of ups and downs, you can tell who respects you and who doesn’t and how they handle certain scenarios.

[–]Rp9972 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

You did not because you valued your male friendships more than the pussy, that simple. If she was the last woman on earth and it was only you and 10 friends you would have thrown the bro code out the window.

It’s important to know that male friendships merely have a value relative to the person.If something comes between the friendship that has more value to you ( such as a large sum of money or facing time in jail) you would pick that over the friendship.

In OPs case they valued the pussy of his ex more than his friendship.

[–]Popeman79-2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I see what you're saying, everything is relative and everybody has a price. But I'm pretty sure I'd rather die alone than steal the girl of a good friend of mine.

Also, do you have kids? There is no price for this, and that if you had to choose between taking your life or theirs, you'd choose yours.

[–]RoyMunson121723 points24 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Nah dude sounds like you’re hangin with a bunch of shit bags. There are true bros out there that value a personal bond over pussy or money.

[–]_Last_Man_Standing_1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

exactly... not a lot of them... most are cucks...
but true bros do exist...

[–]swampbastard693 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

thats not true at all.

[–]Endorsed Contributormonsieurhire22 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Sex leads to children. It's not the "pussy," it's the will to reproduce that trumps intangible feels and intangible value in relationships. A kid is a kid is a kid.

[–]omega_dawg930 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

agreed. i came here to say exactly this.

guys make me laugh with this bro code bullshit.

if you break up with her, there are zero rules... bc when she fucks is when SHE wants to fuck. girls give zero fucks about the bro code.

it's her pussy... her rules. you had your turn and when/if she wants someone else to dump some DNA in her, that's her call and none of your business.

as for your friends, they are going along the path of least resistance like all men do. if she's not wanting and asking a/o begging for the attention from men pursuing her, they'd hunt elsewhere.

iow, she's not totally innocent in this shit. fish go after bait. she's giving signals.

[–]SoulRedemption0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Whethee bro code or not there are friends who have mutual respect. Not all will be the same. Some atleast will ask or let the dude know their intentions.

[–]Ivabighairy11 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

LTR=work

They didn’t have to work for it or put up with her shit to get some ass. OP did. That would be what pisses me off.

[–]whoareyou31[🍰] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You dont have friends fam.

[–]SpinPlates1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I've had 3 of my best friends in 3 different situations all go behind my back and try to fuck girls I had been spinning.

I realized that 95% of men are so pussy starved they will fuck over anyone and everyone to get a piece. It's just the way it is and its deplorable. There is no honor and "bro code" is immediately dismissed if your ex is really hot.

Your friends are beta scavengers. My friends are too. I was eventually able to forgive all of my friends and understand their situation and have some sympathy but they never earned that spot back into knowing about my love life. I don't bring girls around beta males, I don't show pictures of plates I'm spinning, or talk about tinder hook ups. In this day in age the 80/20 rule is slowly becoming the 90/10 rule. The envy I saw in my friends eyes when I would bring over a new gorgeous women every other week was blatantly obvious.

More and more men are becoming virgins and Incels. There was just a study that 30% of men age 18-30 have not had sex in the last year, these men are becoming more desperate for women and will fuck you over in a heart beat to get your sloppy seconds.

[–]Bedtimeshine1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Pussy over friendship any day. Now you know the truth. People really only care about what they want. Your learning that guys you thought of as brothers are anything but. Build your life, walk your own path, smash their ex’s.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes you are being a little bitch

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

but these are my friends

Welcome to the real world.

In their head: it's over, so she's fair game.

Be grateful they waited.

[–]VisiblePlan1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Of course they are. She's a girl, what were you expecting, people won't try and fuck her?

[–]LordMarkStark1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

OP we don't know your veracity in explanation here. Is she or is she not still fucking you? Did you say that to save face or say that to provide solution in intended future actions from peoples responses?

Anyway these people are NOT your true mates or best buddies. They're cunts you hang out with lol Obliterate them to the level required by your sensibilities. Which won't be much, but take a second look at your mates according to your own principles. Maybe don't let them close to your GF's in the future, like see her without them, etc, don't hang round them as much.

Just because your friends exes approach you afterwards, you can't liken this to your situation. You chose not to do that when you probably could have. Thats your choice. But don't assume automatically others will see the world/principles like you just because you did something. They are their own person.

Finally, though this is an old thread?? Take a good look at yourself. You are still having sex with her, you dumped her. NOW you want to control her.

I think you are being too domineering and controlling. You control your GF by getting her then ditching her, continuing to see her once you are done with the official relationship, you control your own emotions by not fucking your friends exes when they are clear and single when we all know you DID WANT TO, and here you are controlling, controlling, controlling.

Do your 'friends' a favor by giving them your best wishes with her. Stop being a POS. In a certain sense you have these issues with people, they don't have them with you. I'm trying to be nice for you. You could go a long way further with just cooling your jets over these slights. If people are single, they are single. You don't have to get uppity or upset because people want to be happy and live life and be in a satisfying relationship. You say its predatory in a sense, but in fact what if just like you for a time, one of your 'friends' (they are probably more friends than your message suggest; I doubt its a full back stab situation).... one of them could make her happy. From that point of view stop trying to put yourself in the way, and if the shoes on the other foot and a girl like that comes to you, think about it and if its ok and she is single you can say in fact you're NOT in the way and just live for a bit. Messy conversations to others be damned, live in the moment, and tactfully address any issues that crop up like adults when/if the time comes with those who think its wrong or whatever. Nah, its not wrong.

Many have been the time I've been with a girl in my life and she has admitted some guy like a movie star is attractive but she is not attracted to them. Sure people can be hot but if you have a thing with someone they actually don't want to throw it away. Now if the movie star was there maybe, but hey thats life. But people don't just chuck value away, mate. Think of it like this. They see her value and they want her. But doesn't mean they had concrete designs before. And just like you, you can't fend that off so don't try. Its not like anyone's thrown you out, you just want to be involved somehow is my bet. Don't worry about it, but this is your issue.

You still like her, so you need to make it known to others, get her back or wish others well. Thats the issue. If there comes a time you need to politely tell someone "hey I am still fucking this bitch, so back off." Just don't be surprised if she picks another over you at some point. I mean, there's no silver bullet. If you really want her to be your GF then do that.

You're not a hero. None of these people on here are. No matter how hard-line they appear. None of your friends are hero's, none. If you want someone go do that and be there for them for as long as its worth it. She's been with you for a while and she probably likes the attention from others because its attention after you brutally told her to fuck off; and she may even play up to this if she knows you're looking on, or address them instead of ignoring them. You've come here with a shitty attitude wanting people to fix up things only you can do. You got yourself into this, get yourself out of it.

[–]keepitreal515 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This isn’t about who can fuck who. True friends understand that ex’s are a no go. All my friends instinctively know this. And we’ve had a few ex’s make contact with others in my friends group. If an ex is dead to any one of us, she’s dead to all of us. To me that’s “bro code”.....

[–]-ThePathIsTheGoal-3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I see this all the time in my social circle and I never understood it. I think it’s one of the shittiest behaviors there is, and never ceases to give me a bad feeling in my stomach.

These people aren’t friends, and they need strong self reflection and self improvement to get them to the point where they are abundant enough to not try to fuck a friends ex.

Do they know how many women are out there? The fact that they chose to go after your ex of all people says all you need to know about them. Honestly, move on from them but also sympathize with them. They’re scarce, and all that attention they’re giving her is only making her want you more (not that that matters but it’s a nice feeling).

[–]Aptote3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

shit men have have shit friends

reaping what you sowed

i don't get why you are pissed after the way you treated this girl.

she won't be your "plate" much longer

you have a long way to go to be rp

[–]q31 1 points [recovered]  (11 children) | Copy Link

Being sensitive, if you ask me.

Low value friends will try and fuck her because it seems easy. You're high value friends likely wont try. Beyond using this as a litmus test for the value of buddies, you probably shouldn't worry about it beyond that.

[–]HurricaneHugues16 points17 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

How is he being sensitive? He just found out he had fake friends

[–]GiraffeOnWheels3 points4 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

Welcome to the club? I have a friend that does it with like all my exes. Made me mad the first time but now I think it's kind of funny.

[–]bruiser181 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Your friend is a fucking faggot

[–]DeusVictor-1 points0 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Seems like you have no respect for yourself if you are still friends with him. That’s a huge sign of disrespect.

[–]GiraffeOnWheels-1 points0 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Yeah that's how I took it at first, in high school. You ever see that episode of It's Always Sunny where Dennis picks up the chicks then Charlie and DeVito go in for the leftovers? That's pretty much my attitude about it now. Plus he never succeeds, so it makes it easier to laugh about i suppose.

[–]HurricaneHugues-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

He'll eventually hit in with a blow so low that you will be blindsided and devastated. That type of behavior does not just stop with ex gfs. It's a weakness of the mind. A symptom of a bigger problem. That weakness cam manifest in other ways.

[–]GiraffeOnWheels0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

He's not my soul mate lol. He's a friend. We have some hobbies that coincide and hang out every once in a while. I did get blind sided and devastated like this... In high school. Then i grew up.

[–]DeusVictor-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Jesus did you seriously put Always Sunny as an example? Really shows your immaturity Dennis isn’t a example to live by nor is any of the group. They are literally meant to be horrible people and that who you are taking notes from? That attitude isn’t healthy nor is having friends that way good at all. This sub is about bettering yourself and filling your circle with people that are elevated in status and maturity. If that’s the person you consider your friend you might want to look at yourself because their is a reason people say “ Show me who your friends are, and I will tell you who you are”.

[–]GiraffeOnWheels0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah, turns out he's a good friend in plenty of other categories. I'm not looking for "the one" perfect soul mate. Y'all starting to get really emotional, it's kind of cute.

[–]HurricaneHugues-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Conglomerate with stray dogs, leave with fleas.

[–]Howdoiusesync1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

What should one do after the test has ended?

[–]Endorsed ContributorFereallyRed5 points6 points  (32 children) | Copy Link

You're plating an ex LTR.

That's stupid.

And that's why you still have hurt sad little feelings.

It's not about your friends, it's about you still thinking you should have control over what she does.

You don't.

Plating an ex is never a smart move.

Every day some guy comes on here and Doesn't understand what "ex" means.

[–]BigFeetBigDick18 points19 points  (25 children) | Copy Link

Stfu. Nothing here implies that he wants to have control over the girl. He’s clearly saying that he feels betrayed by his friends, which is correct on his part. They are fake.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

I’ve heard it’s a a bad idea, I’ll reconsider.

However I would still 100% feel betrayed even if I wasn’t seeing her anymore and it looks like most people here would too.

[–]Endorsed ContributorFereallyRed12 points13 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

So how much timehas to pass before it's cool with you for a friend to fuck an ex?

Is it off the table forever?

A month?

Two weeks?

Social circles fuck within the social circle. That's just how it is, especially in blooper land.

Check your ego.

Most people here are the blind leading the blind.

[–]konstantrevolution-3 points-2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Check your own ego.

He just shares something. You can be right, but you don't get to speak like that. Just be clear, that should be enough for your ego.

[–]Endorsed ContributorFereallyRed2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I have zero obligation to cater to your feelings.

[–]failingtheturingtest0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Heaven forbid someone uses grown up language and hurts someone's self esteem.

Move on chief. If those comments upset you, you're in for a rough ride around here.

[–]konstantrevolution-2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It wouldn't upset me, maybe for a short time for the good, of course. But it's too much to take a ride on somebody who's already open to the most.

[–]omega_dawg931 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

plating her as an ex is more harmful than your friends fucking her.

one thing is in your control... plating her.

the other thing is not your business... what she does with her pussy.

if your friends turn down easy pussy from a girl you were dating, to me, they are gay. them fucking her is more about her than your friends. she's showing everyone exactly who she is... the town cum sponge.

women want attention more than sex. if she's exposing herself in this manner, your friends did you a favor. she isn't even worth plate status.

[–]TopOccasion290 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

if your friends turn down easy pussy from a girl you were dating, to me, they are gay.

Or they could be self-respecting and loyal bros?. I've had many exes and current gf's of my friend come on to me and i rejected them because I've got abundance of pussy and i'm a loyal friend to my close friends.

I agree with your point about the girl though.

[–]omega_dawg930 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

my friends and i don't live by the bro code.

you gotta let a ho be all the ho she wants to be. we don't love these ho's.

[–]Senior ContributorMentORPHEUS1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I feel a huge amount of disrespect and a lack of loyalty. I’ve had several opportunities where I was APROACHED by my friends exes for rebound sex and I denied them each time, because my friendship wasn’t worth pussy. Am I being sensitive?

I can't rule on the sensitive part with information present, but I can say with certainty that you've engaged in a covert contract with your friends and ex. Now they're not behaving the way you contractually expect them to (without having ever disclosed much less discussed and agreed upon this beforehand) and you're mad at them for breaching your secret expectations of them all.

You're also suffering because of a lack of internalized abundance mentality. Right now you're confronted with the reality that it's much easier for women to obtain sex than it is for men, which wouldn't fuss you if you had other options concurrently available. The strange (and mildly amusing) thing about your dilemma is, this usually becomes a problem for men when a monogamous relationship is opened on the initiative of the woman, not after they "take a break" on the initiative of the man.

Later in life, this situation will be reversed as women in your age cohort pass the wall and abundance starts to dry up for them, while you become attractive to a wider band of women than now. This is exactly what is meant by the expression, "Men age like wine, women age like milk."


About "friends." You're not a leader of men while engaging in covert contracts with them. Choose very carefully members of your "tribe" or inner circle, conditional on the outcome of discussion and mutual disclosure of moral and ethical boundaries that are important to you personally. People outside this circle are casual friends who you shouldn't be holding to the standard you're attempting, particularly if you don't derive a masochistic enjoyment of being let down over and over.

Start now building this level of friends if you desire them, but don't attempt to hold the current ones to standards you never mutually ratified.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Absolutely not. You now know where they place you in their minds. They're not entitled to anything. These type of friends will likely become toxic as time goes by. Start expanding your horizons.

[–]exanimousx1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Not sure the entire value of any one person can be dependent on any one particular dimension. We all have vices. I bet most folks out there who talk a big moral game have committed their own share of vices. Including me, and especially me. People are monsters and saints.

[–]konstantrevolution0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Of course. That's only a choice. As far as I see, you've been telling your truth, which is great. Clarity is sufficient, that's what I'm telling.

[–]1walawalawa0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Something similar happened to me. But it was a plate who pushed for me to be a boyfriend. Then instigated a dramatic exit all so she could then try to fuck two of my friends.

I didn't react...to her provocations. But those two idiots are no longer "friends" and never were.

I cut them both off. One got it because he's a sneaky fucker. The other one was trying to rationalize it. I told him to fuck off. He then went running around saying I was mean to him.

What's interesting about the whole thing...I always had a gut feeling about these two thirsty losers and that was confirmed by how desperate they acted when she deliberately threw herself at them.

So...trust your gut. These "friends" need to be cut off.

Sadly I don't trust many guys anymore. They're all a bunch of thirsty losers who don't get why this is something you don't do.

[–]Luckyluke230 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

time to get new friends man

[–]Lyxeka0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Fuck all their exes bro. Its open season. Those dudes are worthless. Go nuts!

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

dude what do you expect. men are pieces of shit. I don't even have male friends anymore. I'll entertain an interesting conversation with another dude in a bar, but fuck everything else. my """friends""" completely marginalized me and essentially abandoned me as a social liability after the fallout of cucking my ex. they all rallied around her. it was a massive, pathetic betrayal. after that i was like fuck having friends.

[–]gorebwn0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Let them have your sloppy seconds, if you beat the brakes off it while you had it, who cares?

[–]DigitalDog00010 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Looks like they aren't your friends. But, you don't own her.

[–]dontbeanasshole7770 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

You expected your friends to have morals/ethics/values/brocode regarding them going after tour ex.

Reality shows they don't follow such values.

What is your definition of a friend? Do they still fit in?

[–]PadThai420 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

This has nothing to do with TRP theory, you’re friends and not your friends. Simple.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

Yep. I used to call orbiters vultures because of this behavior.

Forgive them for their blueness. They do not know better.

[–]SoulRedemption1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Bullshit. They know exactly the fuck they doing. Beta or not.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I didn’t say they didn’t know what they were doing. I said they don’t know better. If English isn’t your first language when someone “doesn’t know better” it means that there is a better way but that person can’t comprehend it.

[–]SoulRedemption-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It isnt my first language. But thats not what it means. It means they are doing something stupid because they havent been taught or brought up to know better

Edit: its used in a way to say they are being stupid, forgive them

[–]_Anarchon_0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

These "friends" are breaking the bro code. Handle your business.

[–]cluelessguitarist0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Real friends and real men honor the code of bro before hoes, remember that. If they are not in your team they would do otherwise, get real friends and dont worry about being alone, good people will come into your life just grind and improve man, find people just like you with the same mindset,im actually doing this myself, i rather be alone than with bad company.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Nut in her mouth and (obv if shes cool with it) get a lil snapchat so that you can show the "boys". When they start tryna "alpha up" on you. Lmfao or just ditch them and be glad your social life is being dewormed.

[–]Mzo20160 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

fuck those friends. Unless they asked you and you sais yes you can theyd be dead to mee

[–]Mescalean0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

You have something few men have these days OP. A sense of honor/loyalty. Ditch the snakes. Your friends are thirsty ass simps

[–]Feministmalesaregay0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Fuck your friends.

If that happened to me I would make sure to somehow fuck them over as much as I possibly could.

[–]cafeitalia0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

They are not your friends.

[–]throwitdownman0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

If you have the courage, and decisiveness to drop an LTR, why can you not muster the same strength and confront your ‘friends’ about it? Are you scared of men, and only can be confident around women?

If you have a problem, identify the root cause. You KNOW who is causing you discomfort - the ‘friends’ who are after your ex. There is NOTHING wrong with busting their balls and saying ‘you want my leftovers?’. These betas who would wait until you are out of the picture, to swoop in, I guarantee they do not have the EQ to handle your challenges well. They’ll be ‘umm-ing’ and ‘well-ing’ till tomorrow.

And look, it’s one thing for ex-s to hook up with friends. You wouldn’t be the first. You shouldn’t feel bad about it either. Hell just look at the Kardashians - they ‘dated’ like a huge chunk of NBA players. Even NBA players (millionaire physical specimens) get salty, but they move on. However, they take the chance to be brutal in the locker room as well - talking about how they ‘had it first’, ‘she’s mine’, ‘I can get her whenever’, ‘he’s a snake’. It’s not even about the ‘girl’ anymore, it’s about making sure you are not seen as a wimp.

Go defend yourself. You DON’T want the reputation of ‘Hey go after Red-455, pft he’s a pushover, just challenge him’.

[–]Jabbermouth0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

“It be ya own niggas” - Aristotle

But seriously, these guys are your friends. Drop them and move on. Also plating your ex is probably a bad idea.

[–]wrypity0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

they are not your friends

you know this

even implied it in your title before even writing the rest.

[–]TheRedPillMonkey-3 points-2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Man code dictates your bros ask permission before going after an ex.

Man code also dictates you always give permission. After all, if she's fucking whoever, may as well let your mates have a go.

[–]bbcbarbarossa 1 points [recovered]  (1 child) | Copy Link

Yet another reason why MGTOWs always win

[–]Senior Endorsedmax_peenor3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Win what?

[–]kayfab-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

with friends like these you don't need enemies hey, fuck those idiot worst go true force loneliness. You don't need idiots like that in your life.

[–]recursoinominado-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Man, FUCK those "friends", in the end, they did you a huge favor, who knows what would be the consequences of keeping them around due to ignorance of their true characters.

Congrats for your ex too, most women would not share those informations with you, even if it is with the purpose of making you jealous by showing off her options.

[–]addwater-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

OP you need to reevaluate this and why your friends disrespect you to the point of overtly trying to fuck your girl the first opportunity they get.

They're most likely a bunch of losers, but it's likely you're also not commanding enough respect from those close to you.

Either way, the right thing to do is ghost all of them and find new friends.

Don't give any of them closure either, even the girl. Delete them from your life and do better next time.

[–]AuberyBitoni-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Been there.. a real friend wouldn't do that, cut off that scum.

[–]PimPedOutGeese-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

M advice OP... /u/itiswr1tten could not have said it any better in his reply.

There are some unresolved issues IN YOU (which isn't horrible I mean your a human first, male second). Its not the friends. It can't be! That doesn't mean your feelings are discredited though... But first...

I say this because of what YOU wrote. YOU downgraded her. Your choice.

But its like...

"Im gonna get mad at you for being a man and wanting sex with an AVAILABLE woman..."

Its the same as...

"I'm gonna get mad at you for being a woman and wanting the better suited male because x,y, and z."

Can't get too upset about a man doing male things and a woman doing female things.

At this point though in this venture you have to make a decision. Kick them to the rocks or not.

Personally I'd have a conversation with them. Clear the air. Let their response be the discerning factor. Of course if you feel so betrayed you could just ghost them. Thats your call. There is too much unknown to say hey ditch the friends or have a talk with them. Only you can handle that one. To answer your stated question no i dont think your overly sensitive at all but CLEARLY you weren't ready to downgrade, emotionally anyways, her to a plate... Despite what other reasons you had to do so be it good or bad.

I mean... Your human and you WILL feel what you feel. You can condition your feelings but they are still there.

I dont blame your friends because they have no, none, nada, zilch, zero control over your emotions and how you handle perceived situations. Only you do. Not to discount their actions... But we can't control that. Only your actions and output.

For you guys going on about "phaggot friends" or "bro code".... I'm just going to come out and say it.

"Bro code" doesnt even exist...

No. It doesnt. You've just heard about it from a buddy or a group of buddies to hamster up ideologies to protect your own self interest or TV shows and movies. Reality doesnt necessarily care about your "bro code".

Bro code is a set of standards, AS YOU PERCEIVE THEM, and you ASSUME that other men will follow this set of "standards". So many logcal fallacies here. Two huge ones are:

1) Its COMPLETELY subjective. Your outlook on code is different than your brothers, best friend (as proven by the OPs post), and/or my own. 2) You can't control their side of the street. Only yours. So this type of thinking is doomed to fail anyways.

That said that DOESN'T mean you should have NO standards but expecting everyone to follow YOUR standard (saaaaaay.... not sleeping with a man's ex) is just outright foolish thinking. Now if they were still together of course my view would be different... But OP clearly said he's done.

[–]goatenciusmaximus-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It may be a perfect time for breaking up with your friends as well, I have a small group of friends but they would never turn their heads in the direction of my ex, well not if they intent to still having me as their friend.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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