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Red Pill Theory5 Red Pill Truths From My GF (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by [deleted]

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[–]MrAestheticz 38 points39 points  (5 children)

Great post. I just fell out of a LTR and many of these reasons hit close to home with me as well. I didn't do these things enough which is why it ultimately failed. Thank you for this.

[–]rpscrote 6 points7 points  (2 children)

Same man. Its the second point, always the second point. It's easy to maintain frame, stay alpha, etc when you don't have the gender literally built for manipulating your mind actively working on it. Sometimes it goes fast and sometimes it goes slow but they always try to wiggle into your head.

[–]gussiie 3 points4 points  (1 child)

The 2nd one for sure. I am still currently in a great relationship with my girlfriend, but found myself feeling anxious and depressed very early within it and it was because I stopped being me. This lead to us having multiple fights etc. etc etc. Fortunately, I was able to realise that and started doing things that I enjoyed doing before I met her. Things have never been better.

[–]MrAestheticz 3 points4 points  (0 children)

So much truth. This is exactly what happened in my situation. Identity was lost by being a beta, respect was lost, relationship fails. But I've found TRP now so I'm working on making this never happen again.

[–]onenifty 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This really resonates with me as well, man. My 5.5 year LTR just ended due to a lack of a few of these points. For me, I have an underdeveloped emotional side and can't reciprocate properly as a man, so points 4 and 5 really hit home.

We can always improve! Good luck with your journey.

[–]averageredpill 51 points52 points  (8 children)

I like this post, it's very livid and positive reinforcing masculine traits and giving a good outlook to LTRs.

Being masculine is not only a physical state, it's also a mental state and not always is obvious but you have to have a playful mind in order to dominate a relationship. That's why getting out of the anger phase is so important, when you enter the creative phase the world is your playground.

[–][deleted]  (6 children)

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    [–]TRP Vanguard: "Dark Triad Expert"IllimitableMan 5 points6 points  (4 children)

    I believe he meant lucid rather than livid.

    [–]throwaway131072 22 points23 points  (1 child)

    Maybe he combined "lucid" and "vivid".

    [–]ptokerT 8 points9 points  (0 children)

    I'm thinking he meant vivid.

    [–]hurkdurkler 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    yeah, we should check the vividity

    [–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

    The essence of fake it til you make it. A positive physical state is indicative of a positive mental state. The mind follows the body and vice-versa. TRP gives men the guidelines and understanding of women, relationships and society in general.

    [–]TRP VanguardCyralea 5 points6 points  (0 children)

    It's amazing how consistently women respond to these things. Women love being overpowered. Wrestling with them, bear-hugging them, tossing them around. Using the weight of your body to trap them turns them on. Physical dominance is something every girl is aroused by.

    As for not changing, that should be a standard part of holding frame. You aren't making her happy by giving her what she's asking for. The same way that a child wants to stay up all night, or avoid eating so they can go play. They regret their actions later, but lack that foresight.

    The most common shit test in LTR's is trying to get you to give up your time for her. And it's sadly the one I see guys fail most consistently. Don't stop hanging with your boys or stop playing sports just so you can have an extra movie night with her. She'll resent you for it down the road.

    [–]triangleman83 9 points10 points  (4 children)

    My wife is the kind of woman who will say exactly what her problem is most of the time with some prodding or if she's in the mood for discourse. She might shit test, but she doesn't hide my grade from me, so to speak. You could say she doesn't mind coaching TRP ideas because she knows that a TRP man is what she wants. She knows I will pick myself back up if it's pointed out that I'm slipping.

    While I didn't know about TRP earlier in our relationship, I generally learned the tricks for passing her shit tests and once I know how to solve a puzzle, I don't generally forget that. It was nice to find TRP and see in black and white exactly why the things that worked on her actually worked.

    [–]Endorsed ContributorRedPillDad 1 point2 points  (3 children)

    Taking her shit tests as helpful coaching is a healthy perspective as long as her intentions are always constructive. Even then, the risk is that you become her trained monkey with endless "Yes dear" compliance, and the bedroom gradually turns cold as sexual tension dissipates.

    Who wears the pants between the two of you?

    [–]triangleman83 1 point2 points  (2 children)

    That's the interesting thing, she does not want me to be the trained monkey, she wants me to be forceful, so she wants the same things as other women, she's just willing to give away the secret instead of playing the game. I'd be the first to admit my bedroom skills were all about being soft and caressing rather than forceful and strong before she came along and she's helped guide me towards what she wanted just like I have modified her bedroom behaviors some.

    Years ago she would have insisted she wore the pants, however after so long of me managing the responsibilities of the household, she's softened up over time and tends to defer to me more and more. She went from girl-power, girls are tough and independent, to most wanting to cater to me and make sure that I'm happy. She's still got a strong personality which I certainly appreciate. We play to each others strengths and when it comes to dealing with and understanding people, she still tops me so I usually go by her judgments there.

    Kids won't ever be happening, just dogs, so she has somewhere to focus her needs to care for small cute creatures without it costing us too much of our time or money and adding all that stress to our relationship.

    [–]Endorsed ContributorRedPillDad 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    You have a good RP woman there. Well done.

    Has she read any redpill? She would probably appreciate this place instead of being freaked out by it.

    [–]triangleman83 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    She's not much for internet forums really. I throw a little TRP knowledge around here or there and she generally agrees with it.

    She actually got into a big argument with her sister, sister's now husband, and cousin (female) on her cousin and her cousin's mom riding the CC one time. Cousin went til 22 before having sex but then started making up for lost time, her mom was recently divorced and had never been with another man, also started making up lost time.

    My wife is very much against the CC and the three of them were trying to argue for it saying it's harmless fun for adults. She holds the standard of actually being in an exclusive relationship before sleeping with someone. It was a pretty heated argument actually but everybody eventually got over it.

    [–]asdfghjkltyu 3 points4 points  (0 children)

    Women will nag men to change endlessly, but they don't really want that change. They want you to stand strong.

    [–]OnlyForRP 4 points5 points  (0 children)

    I really enjoyed your post. These things are a great reminder for me whenever I have an LTR. I'm getting better at maintaining alpha status while in a relationship, but in the past I would almost always slip into classic beta male relationship behaviors: catering to her, letting her change and dictate my personality, starting to pay for EVERYTHING, ext. Honestly, in retrospect, most of my ex's have been really confused/disappointed when I started to act like this when I was so alpha initially. Almost like they were thinking "what the fuck? I found this great guy who played by his own rules, and now he is so... submissive. Bye." Haha, you live and you learn. I remember before I took the red pill I was driven crazy by their seemingly completely irrational, unjustified break ups. They didn't even have a reason why they were breaking up with me. I thought I was the perfect BF doing everything for them. I'm so happy I found seduction, and the red pill. Has changed my life =).

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      [–]TRP Vanguard: "Dark Triad Expert"IllimitableMan 5 points6 points  (0 children)

      Enjoy the flourishing love while it lasts my man. Best of luck to you. Great post.

      [–]RPSigmaStigma 4 points5 points  (7 children)

      I love most of this, but isn't it a bit contradictory to say "do what you want" and then say things like "even if you want to sleep, let her give you a back rub"?

      [–][deleted]  (2 children)

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        [–]the_number_2 11 points12 points  (1 child)

        Here's a little associated reading from the field of psychology on why letting her do stuff for you works. It's called the Ben Franklin Effect, the TL;DR of which is summed up in the quote that is associated with first offering up the idea:

        "He that has once done you a kindness will be more ready to do you another, than he whom you yourself have obliged."

        http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ben_Franklin_effect

        [–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (3 children)

        People "fall in love" (females and beta boys) in their heads. So if she is initiating and doing a favor. You can bet while she is doing this task, attraction is building in her head, because the entire time she is thinking about you.

        [–]topspeedj 2 points3 points  (1 child)

        My ex was quite a tomboy and at the start of our LTR she would cook me meals all the time and just do wife stuff for me all the time on autopilot. She said she just felt compelled to do it. There must be some automatic 'on/off' switch in a woman's head when you're enough of a man in her eyes.

        [–]RedPill115 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        It's feminists who try to convince everyone (including other women) that being independent and the lead is "better".

        It's MUCH easier and safer (and happy) to follow. You let someone else go out front, then you come along for the ride, getting off if you want.

        Try social dancing some time, it's a microcosm of male/female relationships. Including some women thinking they want to lead but actually not liking it, women insisting that "following is just as much work!!!" when it's not, then other women admitting (when those first women have left) that no, it's definitely not as much work to follow, and it's much more work to lead.

        Also, your follow will follow much better when you're a skilled lead. It's exactly the same.

        [–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

        You have a quality girl. Thats why this works for you. If you try that with an american girl, I dont think it will work so well.

        [–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (20 children)

        Good job...now start lifting

        [–]mega_beta 25 points26 points  (18 children)

        I have a 600lb deadlift and can say that lifting isn't the holy grail 90% of guys here seem to think it is. There's no risk involved in lifting weights. Lifting weights is boring as fuck. It's only part of the equation.

        [–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

        And yet, the vast majority of people cannot sustain the motivation to do it to reach even an intermediate level. Lifting weights whether for aesthetics or performance trains something different - the ability to stick with a routine task for years and avoid falling into slumps, motivation-dead zones, and excuse-making. It IS hard not because of the difficulty, but rather because of the simplicity.

        It is the holy grail for people who are lazy, weak, rationalizing, and excuse-making (as well as out of shape). The benefits it confers might seem less than say, starting a business or finishing your MBA or learning to code. But that's also comparing oranges to apples because lifting's main pay off is discipline and force of will to stick to something dull - a skill you will need when starting a business or finishing your MBA.

        [–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (1 child)

        Lb for lb or maybe I should say hour for hour, lifting is one of THE most beneficial activities a man can partake in. It takes 2-3% of your week to do it and get Godly results and it enhances EVERY aspect of your life.

        This has nothing to do with being a holy grail as much as it is a logical proposition when you look at time invested vs result obtained.

        [–]2red4u 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        Man, I wish it was only 3% of my week. It's around 10% of my waking hours, and around 15% of my total free time.

        [–]Enjoy_The_Decline 10 points11 points  (4 children)

        So much this

        At one point in my life i was roided up blasting tren etc, did not make me alpha or better as a man

        Have to do hobbies that involve risks, and women if youre scared to approach them like myself.

        [–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (3 children)

        you were blasting tren and didn't make you a better man - well a more manly man? youre the first person i heard say that lol

        [–]Enjoy_The_Decline 5 points6 points  (2 children)

        gave me tons of acne and killed my emotions

        A lot of these mental effects from steroids are placebos, so many parrots saying gear makes you "alpha"

        [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

        not at all this is all backed by science. theres plenty of studies showing behavior changes in all sorts of animals when given test, tren, etc... showing more dominance. look it up on google scholar

        i for one noticed the first week of testosterone i was a lottttt calmer in social situations, especially with girls. normally i'd freak out a bit talking to a girl... my heart would race and i would wanna end it there and just go home and cry. but with test i felt super comfortable. plus i was in a great mood all the time.

        did you crash your estro by accident? i mean i only run tren at around 200mg per week. for me this is enough to get the kind of aggressive IDGAF edge without becoming a maniac.

        [–]Enjoy_The_Decline 0 points1 point  (0 children)

        My estro is fine

        THe placebo effects will ware off once youve used for a while, if theres any changes theyre very subtle.

        [–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (8 children)

        Yea man, been bodybuilding here for 5 years. Gotta nice body. It's not a necessity. Cause I'm a lot smaller than I was 1 year ago and I'm actually getting laid a lot more.

        [–][deleted]  (1 child)

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          [–]1KyfhoMyoba 8 points9 points  (0 children)

          And helps you focus, work through pain/obstacles, good for your health, etc.

          [–]Alegretron 0 points1 point  (5 children)

          I tend to meet a lotta chicks at the various 24fitness locations in my city. Most of the other guys are either too bitchfaced from the pump or feminized to hit on chicks at the gyms in San Francisco.

          [–]HiddenPools 7 points8 points  (4 children)

          I'd go with option three, don't want to have to worry about getting kicked out of their local gym for harassment or whatever.

          [–]Alegretron -1 points0 points  (3 children)

          I'd put that option in the feminized beta category.

          [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children)

          I honestly can't tell if you're a parody account.

          [–]Alegretron 3 points4 points  (1 child)

          Sorry call me old fashioned, but I just don't believe hitting on a chick at the gym by exchanging smiles, pleasant convo, and possibly contact info does not constitute harassment. I'm an outgoing alpha and not victim to the same feminized brainwashing as internet alphas.

          [–]RedPill115 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          Sorry call me old fashioned, but I just don't believe hitting on a chick at the gym by exchanging smiles, pleasant convo, and possibly contact info does not constitute harassment. I'm an outgoing alpha and not victim to the same feminized brainwashing as internet alphas.

          Seriously.

          Have the other posters not figured out that feminism is a massive shit test?

          Look, don't hit on chicks at the health club like you would at 1am at a crowded club with pressure, a "won't take anything but an explicit no as a sign to back off" attitude. That's not a good idea.

          But don't talk to them? You're just doing the "I'm afraid of girls" beta work for them.

          [–]SrPildoraRoja 1 point2 points  (1 child)

          Great post. South American here. It's always good to have insight of RP outside US.

          [–]monstrousarchivist 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          First thing that went through my mind reading this: "Fuckin' A, man. Fuckin' A."

          [–]Manmore 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          "I love helping you. It feels so good!"

          lol, reminds me of when I worked extra at mcd's as a kid. I remember one girl especially, she usually said stuff like that. "I like helping you. I don't know why". Then she giggled and left.

          [–]Nitrobroom 1 point2 points  (1 child)

          Question. I've noticed that what happens a lot after number 4 is carried out is that they try to use it as leverage to elevate their value with you and try to bargain for things. I've seen it happen with my mother, grandmother and ex.

          They'll offer to do something, and then turn around and try to use it as a defence for wrongdoing (lying, for example) or just generally try to elevate themselves (where would you be without me?). Or even negotiate for better perks (how can you treat me like that when I treat you so well? Implied you should do xxx)

          Are all of these shit tests? If so, what can be done to 'pass' them?

          [–]twistedbrother2 3 points4 points  (2 children)

          a) being strong is certainly referring to your projection of security and not physical strength and b) you can change for yourself, just never change for a girl.

          This cute and sexy thing... I never want a girl I'm fucking telling me she feels like my sister.

          [–][deleted]  (1 child)

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            [–]twistedbrother2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            It's terrible that you're still wanting girls you fuck to be teased like a little sister. What you need to take from that is that you are to dismiss their bullshit like you would a little sister, but you hopefully don't make sexual escalation teases to your little sister.

            [–]lots-of-tacos 0 points1 point  (4 children)

            If you could go into some of the specific things you do, thatd be great. Really enjoyed this post. It would really benefit this sub if youd go into greater detail though.

            [–][deleted]  (3 children)

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              [–]1oldredder 6 points7 points  (2 children)

              I really liked your post.

              I'm a little confused at the idea of 15 LTR's in 3 years. My definition of LTR is more than a year PER. Whatev's, though.

              Something with my last LTR kinda sticks with me. Never gave it much thought before. I came from a situation in my life where I may not have shown much self-confidence, I may have been to driven to just take, find, use, survive, not really look at value in a wider sense socially or romantically. Her comment, however, says something more. Her comment was that maybe I didn't think I deserved her. The comment alone is not enough. The look on her face, the tone of her voice said something more between the lines.

              It occurs to me that if a man does appear to lose frame, does appear to lose confidence, you do more than just knock down your own value - you knock hers down too. If she thinks you are of lower value then maybe she thinks she is lowering in value too because she's still with the guy! a-ha...

              [–][deleted]  (1 child)

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                [–]1oldredder 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                hm. I kind of took LTR to its literal meaning, "long-term" and "relationship". A plate barely qualifies as a relationship, emotionally, and "long-term" could be relative but considering how so many flings happen that last 2 weeks to 5 months I didn't figure that kind of thing to be a "long term relationship". That time goes by in the blink of an eye.

                As for the mutual-improving angle, it looks like I'll never get to use it. I've lost all desire to be in any LTR ever again & instead sought to improve myself on my own terms, not because someone else feels improved by my presence.

                [–]spazz56 0 points1 point  (2 children)

                Good work! I would love to see you expand upon your last tip. What I love about this subreddit is that it hits on the straight truths of relationships without the "relationship column" bullshit. Just comparing notes and finding what works.

                [–][deleted]  (1 child)

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                  [–]rpscrote 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                  Please do. Your perspective and manner of writing are very helpful, and the LTR game section of TRP could use more solid contributors.

                  [–]Endorsed ContributorTheeRyanGrey 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  I rap. It's my side project I'm trying to turn into my main job.

                  I refuse to make songs about women or sexual encounters, but I'll be damned if I haven't made multiple songs about Latin Women.

                  They are the world's best and I won't even argue it anymore. They know how to make a man feel like a fucking man if you earn it.

                  [–]nightjesus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  It's true. I'm like your girlfriend. Following these five truths and you are on the path to happiness.

                  [–]SelfMadeMonarch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  Excellent post. Like others, I've sadly had to learn these lessons the hard way. Another I'd say is: don't ask and don't tell. If you want to take her out, don't ask her out, but don't tell her to come out with you, just say you'd like her to dress up so you can take her out. Don't ask, don't tell, just express what you want.

                  [–][deleted]  (1 child)

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                  [–]SelfMadeMonarch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  Read: The Red Queen.

                  Then read No More Mister Nice Guy and Models: Attracting Women With Honesty and you should have an idea.