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She is in her 8th month of pregnancy, and last visit to doctor revealed that baby needs to grow at a better pace.
Immediately, my otherwise absent mother in law starts giving shit to my wife for not taking "enough care". I called the in laws up and asked them to stay away just like they have been all along.

Phone call didn't go very well with them, they got super emotional and my wife confronted me about it. In a fit of rage I ended up saying stuff on the lines of "I don't care if they are a bunch of weeping pussies"

She has been quiet since, but I know this is passive aggression. My objective has been to give her minimum stress during pregnancy. How should I take it from here?


[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando48 points49 points  (16 children) | Copy Link

This shit is the least of your worries.. I have zero hangups about people's sexual preferences - you can fuck who ever you want, whenever you want as far as I'm concerned - but when you're married and have a pregnant wife, I have to ask you what the fuck you are doing when you're trying to hook up with LGBTs and Sissies?

If your sexual preference is for men who dress up as little girls, then at least be a fucking man and own up to it. Stop pretending to your wife and family that you are straight. Stop pretending to yourself that you are straight. And don't ruin your kid's life by pretending you are straight because without a doubt, this shit will come out somewhere down the line and everyone - including your kid - will see you for what you are... a fucking fake.

I suspect that your wife already knows there's something up, which is why she wanted to go on Tinder.

Did she realise that you wanted to go on vacation with a sissy and get up to all sorts?

Lot of cum, rimming and pampering. Message me if you're interested.

Or was it the time that you wanted to bring a hooker with you on holidays to Europe?

Or was it the time that your went to Prague and posted photos of yourself in a little black dress and high heels?

Or the time you wanted to rim this guy for hours?

Fuck off - this is married red pill, not a fucking refuge for guys who are afraid to admit that they like to dress up as women and fuck other men.

Edit: I'm going to add to this because it's something I have some experience in and it's bothering me. I have an uncle who is a teleiophile - his sexual preference is for young guys in their late teens. Despite this, he married my auntie and had kid with her. He hid his sexuality from them for years.

When his kid was in her late teens, it all came to light. Massive family scandal. The charade of his life fell apart and the biggest victim of the whole thing was his daughter. She was vilified in school by her classmates, went off the rails for a few years and spent a long time in therapy but eventually settled down and got married.

Unfortunately, she married an abusive man who she later found out was a closet homosexual. See a pattern forming here? When she discovered this, she went off the rails again and ended up spending a year in a mental institution.

The seperated after that and she met another guy and had a kid with him. A few years later, he left her for another man. She went back into the mental hospital and her kid went into care. No idea where she is now or how she and her child are getting on as we no longer keep in touch with that side of the family.

My uncle played a big part in fucking up the lives of his own family and probably their kids too - all because he hid his real self and his sexual preferences.

Your wife and soon to be born child deserve better than this. You need to own this shit now or you will destroy their lives irrepairably.

[–]threekindsoflucky10 points11 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

This is a work of art. I feel lucky to have witnessed the sheer beauty. Each link I couldn't imagine how it would get worse. And yet.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Batman would be jealous of your investigation skills

[–]RPeed3 points4 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

RIP my workplace search history.

[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando5 points6 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

A few years ago, one of the women in the office I was managing came to me to complain about a co-worker who she said was behaving innapropriately in his office cubicle. I had to push he on what she meant and all she would proffer is that she thought he was watching porn and "touching himself" during work hours.

We didn't monitor inernet usage at the time, so I had to wait until after office hours to check his browsing history. Fuck me. Some of the most depraved shit you'll ever see. Stacks of it. And hits every fucking hour of the day. I have no idea how he got any work done at all.

When he was called to a meeting room the next day to meet myself and the owner, he took about 10 minutes to come down to the meeting. When he did, he had a folder strategically placed in front of his crotch. I instantly thought he was hiding a boner, but noticed during the meeting, that he was hiding a large wet patch. Fucker had jizzed in his own pants. Just before he got fired for porn usage at work.

We started monitoring all PCs from that day on. A lot of companies do. Clearing your search history won't hide it.

[–]RPeed3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Ha. I worked in a large corporation where a guy printed out some photos he'd found on the internet.

But he was working from home and it went to default printer: a busy communal printer back in megacorp HQ.

It was also child pornography.

I often wonder whether he was oblivious, until the cops turned up at his home, or if he had one of those moments where you realize a split second after clicking the wrong thing.

[–]H2orocks3000Probably NAWALTING around0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

How do you tell if they do? I’ll admit, the one time I had a bit of a porn Useage problem I was simultaneously going through a emotionally abusive relationship I was trying to get out of.

(It was family and was kinda dependent on them at the time, just look back and realized I used it to release the large amounts of excess anxiety I had no idea how else to burn off)

[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Ten hail Marys for you

[–]H2orocks3000Probably NAWALTING around0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thank you.

[–]Grimsterr2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It's been a while since I've seen something dismantled so completely. That was like a tornado of truth through a trailer park.

[–]FinancialLeopard5Needs a plunger0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Pure gold.

[–]FoxShitNasty830 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Holy fuck :)

[–]bikermonk[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Agree on every word here too. This roast is helpful

[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Like I said - if you want to dress up as a woman and have sex with other men, then by all means do so. It's your life to live and you only get to live it once, so live it as you so choose.

But if you decide to do this as a secret and live a double life, you are heading for trouble - it will be impossible for you to keep this under wraps forever. At some stage your family WILL find out. It is inevitable. And the effects it can have could be devasatating for them. Add to that the fact that you will find it almost impossible to be happy if you are effectively living a lie. I see you already have trouble sleeping. Ever wonder why that is?

I also noticed that you are Indian - so, I am presuming that your family background is both traditional and religious. It used to be like that here too - that's why so many gay men / men with other sexual preferences felt forced to get married and start families. Just to fit in with the culture of their society.

But it never ends well. You are choosing to be a square peg living in a round hole. People notice that shit - they may not notice why things are off, but they notice that something is off becuse you are not being congruent with who you really are.

You need to find a way to come to terms with this and to tell your wife. The longer you leave this, the worse it will be for her and I doubt that she deserves it. No idea how she'll react but you at least owe her the opportunity to see who you really are and to make up her own mind as to what she wants to do about it.

You need to man up - even if that means manning up in a pencil skirt and golden heels.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

weeping pussies

Great punk band name.

OK. So , this technically isn't rp here. And we 100% coach and are behind the fact that you aren't to be her therapist. In light of that, as part of your job as captain it's important that you EMPOWER your first mate.

So , my wife has a non to explosive relationship with her family. She stresses out about them so much so she will physically manifest all sorts of ailments because of them or to avoid them (recently a panic attack with blurred vision/ migranes etc. to avoid a niece's softball game). I've seen hives, etc. The power of negative thinking on your immune system is crazy.

Still, as a rule, I never intervene unless asked or I can pick up on her drowning in it. I've written texts for her. Coached her on emails and just given some advice on how to think about it. Physically guided her out of the house during an alcohol , stress induced over a terminally ill family member present nit picky mountain out of molehill disagreement between her and her mom.

Families have special buttons and not all of us (seems like women especially) can't deactivate them. All the while it impacts your MAP.

And through bp days and rp days (not only from my current 13 year marriage) I've learned through trial and error... you intervene unasked and you run the gambit of problems ranging from:

  • random outbursts of emotions aimed at you after you think you've "solved" an issue.

  • long lasting passive aggressive steering of the narrative by crafty family members to cause you problems.

  • you stunt her ability to be able to handle her family.

  • the focus of both parties aimed at you and you become the scapegoat.

My wife is over 40 now and just recently had to cut ties for her own health.

If you have a direct issue that involves you or your children, you have a direct say. But like you would deal with anyone, stay on point...don't lose your temper and be clear about real actions and intentions, and if things are just going to shit put a punctuation mark on it along the lines of "Sorry you feel that way. Hopefully we can move past this at some point." and that's it. You remove yourself.

If you are going to be up against a lot of conflict it would behoove you to look into picking up some conflict management tips and skills.

Actually might be worth a ground rules discussion as at this point she may expect you to come charging in at all moments and if you start shifting away from (even behaviors that cause issues) it could startle her and you may get unexpected results.

"Things seem to be getting out of hand and it's a weird position of me in between you and your family. Going forward, I'm always your backup if you need but will refrain from intervening unasked." Families are rife with complicated power dynamics... and she needs power. She wont get that much by relying on you.

Your first mate handles her deckhands that she brought to the ship. You can empower but don't do her job or micromanage. It'll suck too much energy out of your MAP otherwise.

EDIT: ...just saw /u/SBIII 's deep delve on your history. Doesn't really change what I say about in-law management/dynamics, but you definitely need to work out your other issues not discussed here. Part of your map may be figuring out a traditional life might not be for you and owning it.

[–]bikermonk[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thanks for your detailed reply, every post here has had some genuine learning for me

[–]The_LitzRed Beret3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Same happened to me back when my wife was about to deliver our first. In laws drove in from out of state and stayed with us.

Basically I told them to get over it as this is about my wife and not my relationship with them after FIL took offense about something I said.

For a change I didn't DEER my behaviour or talk to much or escalated the argument. Just stated they should get over it or ship out.

[–]Thorondor_Rising2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Who fucking cares? When my wife and i decided to get married her mom bitched about having to travel to attnd the wedding despite having flown across the country thrice in the past year to catch a stray cock.

I told her, "your mom was a cunt when we got together and shes still a cunt now. Stop expecting her to suddenly give a fuck now. Shes always gonna be a disapproving bitch. Shes just butthurt because shes in her late 50s, fat, and alone for buying into the stupidity of thinking a whirlwind romance was awaiting her, just around the corner, at the age of 50!" Full stop. Nothing ever came of it, and she still lays on her back with her head off the bed while i throat fuck whenever thats what im the mood for.

Maybe your problem is that youve established such a pansy ass frame that any time you threaten to grow a backbone it sends her into fully defensive retard mode; i dont know; were you always such an eggshell walking faggot, but how is this a question about you improving yourself, again?

[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Shes always gonna be a disapproving bitch. Shes just butthurt because shes in her late 50s, fat, and alone for buying into the stupidity of thinking a whirlwind romance was awaiting her, just around the corner, at the age of 50!" Full stop. Nothing ever came of it, and she still lays on her back with her head off the bed while i throat fuck whenever thats what im the mood for.

You face fuck your MIL?

Nice.

[–]Rogue684861 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

1) you have boundary issues with your in laws, that's her shit to deal with.

2) it appears you're anxious to fix other people because you're a pretty fucked up individual. Focus some of that judgement and desire for things to work right - onto yourself. I agree with what's been said. You're building a house of cards that will collapse.

Your kid doesn't deserve that

[–]testy681 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I had something similar occur when I first got married. She had two younger brothers who would get carried away and physically get a little too rough with her. One day after we got married, I took each of them aside individually and told them that the relationship between her and I had changed, she was my wife, and I was her protector. I then said if they touched her again, we would have a problem. We never had another problem.

My wife was a little uncomfortable with how direct I was. I just looked at her and said "you are my wife and it is my job to protect you". That was the end of the discussion. Problem solved.

I think the trick is to have that conversation out of the heat of the moment. You have the conversation in person, direct eye contact, explaining that " she is my wife. I won't tolerate her being mistreated. If you do, I will deal with it. I would like to maintain a good relationship with you and this is what you need to do in order to maintain that relationship. Any questions?"

[–]FereallyRedHard Core Red3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Why did you feel the need to insert yourself between baby momma and her family?

Not your circus. Your massively pregnant wife is. Place your attention appropriately.

You drove a wedge between her and her family. That's stupid. What were you trying to accomplish?

Support your crotchfruit. Support your wife.

But pick your battles and don't go off trying to "fix" shit.

Not what she needs, not what she wants.

Be a damn oak.

[–]bikermonk[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Thank you ...Every word is on point.

[–]simbarlionRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I agree with the above answer. But ( cause this shit will continue), don't be shy to throw the odd roar around. Just do it without emotion, and with authority.

A baby signals the passing of the baton to you in the family heirarchy....if you are worthy of it.

Your house, your wife, your cub....

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red-2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

One of the best things of divorce?

NO MORE INLAWS TO DEAL WITH!

Yay me.

Beyond that, go gut punch her and make her spit that baby out. Its cooked enough, and the meth is probably impacting babies growth like the DR said.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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