TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

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PS: originally posted this on redpill, but these retards always ignore the truth and cant take any criticism at all. they think all it takes is being a "man" and maintain frame and all would be ok. if things are not ok, then you must have done something wrong. they are like a stupid delusional cult. I think I'd get more intelligential feedback/debate here compared to there.

Having an abundance mentality doesn't mean nothing if your woman doesn't believe you have abundance.

Now before you just say "just have actual abundance bro, go out and flirt with other chicks in her presence, or even better, actually get another chick so your gf/wife get jealous and think you're high value and they'd get turned on and now desire you much more", let me say these facts:

FACT: not every man has the ability to "spin plates". some are lucky to even get a gf, and some are lucky to get a gf above their leagues. in such cases, the girl KNOW you either cant get another gf, or you can't get another gf as good looking as her.

and if you do try to cheat, and maybe even actually end up getting one? guess what, women have way more options, they don't HAVE to stay with you and they KNOW it. they can choose to leave you in a heartbeat, turn on Tinder, and get hundreds of matches in a single day, even for the ugly chicks it's the same.

and before you say "oh but if you did get another one, then the current one leaving wouldn't be a big deal right?" WRONG! Because what would be your plan for this new one then? Flirt with another chick or get another new one? Then the circle just repeats itself, so whats the point? Might as well just stick to the original one and saving all these troubles huh?

And now let's talking about acting alpha/macho. I don't think it works for every man either.

Why? Simply switch position. Would you feel more attracted to a girl if she's nasty or mean to you, or you get turned on more by a girl who's nice to you?

My own theory is girls don't want assholes. The assholes tend to get most girls, not because they're assholes, but because they're maxxed in some way (good looks, height, money, status, social skill and so on), and that's what attracts the girls to them. Since they're attractive to girls, they have options, they have TRUE ABUNDANCE, so they can AFFORD to act like assholes and get away with it.

In other words, girls go for them DESPITE they're assholes, not because they're assholes.

A low SMV men who act like an asshole wouldn't make him more attractive, in fact, it makes him even worse


[–]passepar2t 26 points27 points  (18 children) | Copy Link

In general, yes, that's true, but you forget that many women are just people and they constantly misjudge people and make mistakes all the time. They don't have some supernatural sense organ that reads a person's value with 100 percent certainty. Look at the huge volume of women who regret sleeping with or dating a guy, even when they were obsessed with him on first impression.

Over time, once they get to know him, they can figure out that he's low-value, but in the short term, it's quite possible to deceive women into thinking you're higher value than you are. Part of that can be achieved through having the right mindset and behavior. This is especially effective on younger women.

If this wasn't the case, I would still be a virgin right now.

[–]boomcheese44 12 points13 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

This is especially effective on younger women.

Agreed. Young, dumb girls can easily mistake you for high value..and later learn you are not.

[–]rus9384Aromantic but cuddly 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The better actor you are, the more it takes for a woman to recognize that you are not that high value.

On the other hand... if you are a good actor, you already are quite high value because of that.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

there are huge limitations to this though, no one is going to mistake a short ethnic guy with an accent for "high value" under any circumstance for instance

[–]boomcheese44 -2 points-1 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

It depends on how drunk the girl is or what her options are. It likely won't work on an 8, but a 4 might take the bait. Or another ethnic girl with an accent of a similar class.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

when i say "no one is going to mistake someone for x" im not including people who are mentally impaired from being in a drugged state im sorry i should have clarified that

[–]boomcheese44 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Still, there is something to be said about shooting in your league. If you are trying to get Stacy, then well its likely not going to happen. You can have success with women in your league.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

You are doing gods work. Better to fake having “value” (as perceived by women) and keep your soul than fully submit to the tyranny of female standards.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

the tyranny of female standards.

Meaning what? You have to shower everyday?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Good job on strawmanning the other person's argument.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Are you stawmanning my sincere question?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Men of past eras had no access to baths. Bathing once a month was a luxury for the nobility, yet... men still got laid

Tyranny.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

This is especially effective on younger women.

Bullshit. Younger women just aren't vetting as hard because you don't matter.

[–]decoy88Men and Women are similar 6 points7 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Naah younger people tend to be less experienced than older people.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy Link

Sorry, but no. A 19 y/o who wastes 3 years in a relationship is 22 when it's over. A 32 y/o who wastes 3 years in a relationships is 35 when it's over. These are totally different places to be. Women aren't stupid. They know this.

I have bedded younger women who asked nothing about my financial life. Every woman within 10 years of my age (mid 40's) has been very keen for details.

[–]decoy88Men and Women are similar 6 points7 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

What are you even saying? That age has no correlation with maturity? Are you insane?

Younger women are easily won over by obvious lies a lot more often than older women. Why? Because the older chicks already been through that shit and learned from it

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

What are you even saying?

That the incentives of a 19 y/o women are different than the incentives of a 32 y/o woman. That's it.

Do you see how a 19 y/o is presented with a different set of options than a 32 y/o woman?

Do you see how the 19 y/o could have 4 failed 3 year relationships and still be safe for mothering, where a 32 y/o has zero room for failure in that same time frame if she wants a family?

Don't you think they date a little differently?

[–]decoy88Men and Women are similar 3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

That the incentives of a 19 y/o women are different than the incentives of a 32 y/o woman. That's it.

And it’s easier to con younger people into thinking you have those incentives.

Confidence, intelligence, Money Sexual prowess. All these things can be bluffed. And older women care about that shit too, it’s just normally harder for young women to clock. Not to mention they’re more likely to put up with shitty behaviour for a while before figuring out its not normal.

Yes older people have less time, but that doesn’t necessarily mean they’d be wiser and vetting men.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

And it’s easier to con younger people into thinking you have those incentives.

I'm talking about her incentives, not mine. I am talking about her timeline. A three year mistake at 19 will be meaningless. A three year mistake at 32 could close her fertility window. So the 32 y/o vets way, way hard than the 19 y/o.

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ 42 points43 points  (43 children) | Copy Link

My wife could get any man whenever she wants, and I couldn't.

But she is the one who cares more that I stay, she is the one who is afraid that I cheat.

Abundance mentality means I'm not clinging to our relationship like my life depends on it, even if it's actually plausible that my life may be destroyed if the relationship ends, and I never find a partner again. I don't behave like it.

If I was suddenly behaving like I was aware this is probably my one and only shot in life, she would be emotional at first and feel comforted, but the next day she will try to dominate me and her pussy will be sahara level of wet.

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Right. I am 100% sure that Mr. Abrams loves me deeply deeply deeply. I have had over 20 years to observe him, both around me and around other people, and there is no doubt about that in my mind. It grants immense peace.

That said, I have also seen him cut people out of his life without a second thought. He is immensely loyal, and he will give people so many second chances that they sometimes think they have infinite second chances. But after a certain point, a switch is flipped, and that person is dead to him. It could be a friend of 30 years, it could be a close colleague of over a decade, it could be (and has been) his own mother. He has told me many many times that his brother and I are the only exceptions to this rule, but I have never believed him. His brother is absolutely an exception, and our children are exceptions, but I am not.

It doesn't matter how much he loves me (a lot) or what he would do for me (just about anything). All that matters is that if I push it too far for too long, he will cut me out and I will be dead to him. I have seen it happen, and that is the only abundance mentality he needs.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Very well put.

[–]Wobbles8stevePurple Pill Woman 17 points18 points  (23 children) | Copy Link

My BF is like this to an extent. He let slip that he feels like I'm his real shot at something lasting and solid. But his behavior is not clingy and it draws a lot of desire for attention on my side. He treats me better than anyone has, but he still holds to himself. He lets me in, but only as far as he wants me. Keeps the mystery there and makes me feel like I love him more than he does me ( while not making me feel unloved). I always feel like he could do better, but he's never shown doubt in us, only confidence and that's sexy. I know i could go else where and get someone a lot more attractive, (100% honesty, he's probably a 4 and I'm about a 6) but he makes those guys invisible.

This makes me work hard and makes me want to do things for him. I crave his attention and I end up being the one who initiates more often as a result. He shows that he is VALUABLE as a partner.

I agree with u/eastuss . It works for other males as well.

But OP has a good point here, they can definitely get away with more:

In other words, girls go for them DESPITE they're assholes, not because they're assholes.

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ 16 points17 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Yes the asshole aspect is just a by-product packaged with the overall "I do me" mentality that makes someone a man a good and attractive partner. Most women prefer an asshole man over a dependent one, but they would prefer someone balanced.

And sometimes "asshole" is just how the beta niceguys view men who are just not putting the other on a pedestal and who privilege themselves first, which is how everyone should be.

[–]Wobbles8stevePurple Pill Woman 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Couldn't agree more. =)

[–]basebool 5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I think of it as a sports thing to make the concept easier. Everyone would love to have an all-star who is a nice guy. Everyone would want an all-star who is an asshole. Nobody wants someone who sucks, nice or asshole.

[–]Wobbles8stevePurple Pill Woman 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I like it, simple and to the point =].

[–]Nobodykers 2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

I always thought that strategy was valid but never saw a woman admit it as valid.

[–]Wobbles8stevePurple Pill Woman 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I enjoy it. Can't speak for all women, but it really drives me up a wall in the best of ways. And honestly i think some women are incapable of analyzing their relationship past the surface, or are unwilling to admit that there is some kind of trade off and not just this magical love that's been shoved down our throats.

[–]decoy88Men and Women are similar 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

Most people are bad at articulating stuff

[–]Nobodykers 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I think most people dont think long about why they do stuff. Maybe people on PPD are inherently more likely to observe themselves and explain their own behaviour. Try talking about this stuff with people who dont study psychology and you are seen as a weirdo or tryhard overthinker.

[–]decoy88Men and Women are similar 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yup

[–]TheReformist94 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Only works because YOU feel he can do better, not him having any abundance

[–]Wobbles8stevePurple Pill Woman 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Could it not be both?

[–]TheReformist94 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

No. Women hold all the cards. You perceive he has abundance, not him having it. When/if you get bored of him you'll realise you hold the cards. Not him

[–]MxCmrnPurple Pill Man 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Well said. Sounds like you have a good guy.

[–]Wobbles8stevePurple Pill Woman 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thank you. He hasn't shown me anything less yet. =]

[–]RoninCDN -1 points0 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

Your bf fails to vulnerable and you applaud his suffering. Good for you.

[–]Wobbles8stevePurple Pill Woman -1 points0 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

I assume you mean failed to be vulnerable? Even then, still not sure what you mean. Anywho. He's not suffering, and i would never want him to hurt, let alone encourage it. Move on. You don't know of what you speak.

[–]RoninCDN -1 points0 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

You said that him not being mysterious and not vulnerable was a turn on while assuming that not hes hurt? Way to be have a cake and eat it too.

Also step off the pedestal of maxing the word count princess. The fact that a small comment was too hard for you to read lets me know he didnt take you for your intelligence.

[–]Wobbles8stevePurple Pill Woman 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Being strong is a turn on? Who would have thought. Don't make the mistake thinking that I've detailed everything about my relationship on this post and that you can pull this assumption from it and judge me. We are, and have been vulnerable. It has it's place though and no, it is not sexy. Its intimate and can be scary at times. But rarely is it sexy.

[–]RoninCDN 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

Thats not what you said initially, you framed your relationship as where your bf withheld his vulnerabilities in order to attract you. I say that that is a bad dynamic. If your relationship differs from that framing, then we can agree. Its just that Ive seen men try their hardest to fit a masculine mold while been torn to shreds by women that demand it, its a vicious cycle that I want no part of.

[–]Wobbles8stevePurple Pill Woman -1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Please re-read my original comment. He is that way. It is his personality. I think his personality is sexy. He is strong. He takes care of his own shit. But he does know if he needs to he can come to me he can. But that is rare. I do not encourage or discourage him being open to me. If he wants to, he will.

Let me rephrase my original post a bit.

My BF does this organically and it's sexy. Him not being all over me is refreshing. He is a strong, funny and a wild man but he keeps to himself inside. He is confident, he has his own hobbies, he doesn't make me feel like he's desperate for attention. He's comfortable and sweet talking to other women, though i know he wouldn't cheat, it does spark jealously.

He gives off an abundance mentality, that I'm not the only choice he has (though he has chosen me) and i feel proud that he chose me. It adds value to him.

Between the bit jealousy and the way he present himself and lack of attention makes me want to work harder for him and earn his attention. I want to do things for him to make him happy and make myself better so he keeps choosing me and not someone else. Logically, i know i could find a new relationship easier as I'm the more physically attractive one, but that's not how he makes me feel. He makes me feel like he is the one who could go elsewhere.

Of course im not going to lay out my whole relationship here or even feel like i could. It's complicated just like anything else, but the way he presents himself is that he is someone who has options and though he has chosen me, it leaves me feeling desire to work for him and earn my place there.

Hopefully I am more clear this time. I never intended it to be interpreted that i push him to be this way or even knew how much i liked it till i started dating him. I used to love being drowned in affection, but it loses its value when it's all the time and it becomes safe and standard.

[–]RoninCDN 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Okay, I retract my previous comments. I just dont like the idea of constantly living up to a woman attraction. If the risk of failure is so high its odd that men are expected to play this game.

[–]TheReformist94 3 points4 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

That's not you having abundance. Your wife just values her relationship with you at this point in time and it suits her to be monogamous to you. She's still has abundance that you don't have. She's just not tapping into it

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ 2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

The abundance lies in the perception that I don't need her, and not her specifically. That I would be fine by myself and I would go to hookers or flirt and be ok with it. The abundance is the idea that I've enough and I could afford to go with less.

[–]TheReformist94 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

No disrespect but that's not ideal or abundance.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Reality doesn't really matter. What matters is that she feels her guy can get along fine without her.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

But now we enter a fun spiral. We, men, move in a material world but (and this is my opinion borne from observation) are more sentimental than women, and women move in a sentimental world but are more materialistic than men.

For a man, things are a means. For a woman, things are the object. That is why, if a man and a woman live alone, the man's home will tend to be spartan where a woman's home will tend to more like, well, a home.

So if you are in possession of abundance - not acting as though you have, but in the frame of mind of having - it makes no difference to the woman. From her limited, exterior perception on this limited point in space and time, it is indistinguishable from having abundance.

Why? Because if you, the man, can actually leave the woman behind and get his dick sucked by someone else that very same day or not is purely academical. IRL, what would change? What would be the impact?

The whole concept hinges on the woman perceiving the man's abundance, not in him having it.

[–]Taipanshimshonhere for the downvotes 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Came to say some version of this.

[–]chaddad9000 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

even if it's actually plausible that my life may be destroyed if the relationship ends, and I never find a partner again. I don't behave like it.

I think its a lot more plausible that if you've had 1+ "successful" relationships, you'd be able to get back on your feet and have another. Lots of stuff around here about "dread" and flirting with the waitress and who could gets ass on tinder, but the principle is actually on a longer time scale.

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I'm introvert, I've a kid and I'm ageing, a breakup would likely annihilate the little confidence I've had and I might be drowned in responsibilities and chores. Us men need extra mental power just to go out there and find someone, we don't have to just exist. I could do things but it requires lot of efforts that I might be necessarily willing or capable to make.

[–]chaddad9000 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

I don't know your situation, but IMO divorced RP guys constantly sell themselves short b/c their marriage ended poorly. If you had a happy relationship for X years, that puts you head-and-shoulders above half the guys posting here at the very least.

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Sure, but why does it matter? I already struggled to be where I am, if there's a break-up, that means I'll have to rebuild everything upon worse foundations. For example, having a kid with another woman is a red flag to lot of women. I know I can make everything pass with enough assertiveness, but this requires time and strength that might be annihilated by the accumulated duties I got with years. I'm not longer a student who only had to care about his grades and had time to work-out and going out.

[–]concacanca 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

My wife could get any man whenever she wants, and I couldn't.

Hey now I believe you can get any man you want.

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I knew someone would notice this :(

[–]RoninCDN -1 points0 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Holy fuck. Your life is basically a lie, and your wife's love isnt real. Dating is a fucking scam I guess

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

Go back to your room incel.

[–]RoninCDN 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Your wife would dominate you if she found out you had a weakness so you act like you dont to save your pathetic ass.

Name call me all you want but youre 1 divorce away from being someones bitch.

[–]Eastuss༼ つ ▀̿_▀̿ ༽つ 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm not really married.

[–]The_Lone_Apple 6 points7 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Most women are not seeking out an abusive a-hole to date. Those men are usually predators who know how to get close to women before showing their true colors. They use their looks or money or lies to attract women. There are damaged people who have gone through trauma in life and end up being attracted to the same sort of abuser that victimized them. However, most women want a decent, self-aware person who has empathy and treats them with respect. A-hole guys are basically just evil con artists.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

However, most women want a decent, self-aware person who has empathy and treats them with respect.

Yeah, but that's basically the vast majority of men, isn't it? You can't build a functional society with 50% of the population made up of a stronger, ravenous, anti-social gender.

So how do you pick one out of all the gentle, caring, empathetic men?

How about one with a nice job? This way you know he's dependable, responsible, and ambitious. That's nice, no?

Oh, and his own place, maybe? That's an extra bit of security, right?

And if he can be healthy and good looking, means you know he'll be there for you, your parents and friends will say you got a nice catch, and he can look after you.

I mean, wow, look at that. Nice, loving, respectful, has his own place, a career, a car, vacations - and all the other women are so jealous!

You could almost start a family with a guy like that, huh?

[–]The_Lone_Apple 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

There are many people who fit that mold yet luck plays a part as well. I might not have met my wife if not for the fact that we had a mutual friend who thought we might click because of our wiseass personalities.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes, but no one at 18 is going to have that - but there will be other differentiators - health, physique, personality, etc.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

More incel content

[–]TheReformist94 -1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Irrelevant comment

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It's damned relevant. This is supposed to be "purple pill debate" and there's no such thing as a Red Pilled incel. It's a contradiction in terms.

[–]UncleEskel9 points [recovered] (3 children) | Copy Link

Perception is everything, that’s why they harp on ‘mentality.’ Of course it’s easier with a high SMV, however I know guys with high SMVs that can’t get women for shit.

Conversely, I have an army buddy I still talk to who’s a skinny, small ginger who doesn’t make much now and isn’t attractive. He’s even bi and takes dick on the regular. Low SMV on paper. But fuck me, that man can work a room and pull 9s. Good wing man too. He’s (for the first time) actually in an LTR with a legitimately hot, smart, all around pretty solid girl. And if you met him you’d say “why??”

Because he truly believes he has the biggest dick in the room (he doesn’t) and knows he can pull. He’s got abundance mentality, a fun, confident personality, etc. Perception is everything.

[–]RoninCDN 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

That dude is the definition of "Wait, thats illegal"

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Hehe, I know such a ginger. Anything is possible with the right swagger. Playing in a band helps as well.

[–]rus9384Aromantic but cuddly 9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

and before you say "oh but if you did get another one, then the current one leaving wouldn't be a big deal right?" WRONG! Because what would be your plan for this new one then? Flirt with another chick or get another new one? Then the circle just repeats itself, so whats the point? Might as well just stick to the original one and saving all these troubles huh?

The point is not even to have multiple girls at the time. The point is that you have an ability to find a replacement for you current girl[s] easily.

And now let's talking about acting alpha/macho. I don't think it works for every man either.

I think this is true, though. But it's not about high value. It's just that your frame should suit you. If you don't have a big stature, acting like you can smash every other dude who is much stronger than you is dumb.

The assholes tend to get most girls

Assholes just are more likely to attend parties, do drugs, etc. and girls who are into this stuff are easier to get laid with. It's also easier to have multiple such girls.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Well I mean yeah... to have true abundance you need options and to have options you need value.

Where I disagree is with your deterministic attitude. These are things that can be learnt by most average men.

The issue you often see however is below average omega men mistaking themselves for average. No it won't work for omegas.

But for a standard AFC beta yes they can learn to improve their behaviour and build abundance it just might take some time and practice.

I basically flirt with girls automatically without even knowing I'm doing it lol people I'm with just comment on it. It's easy. I don't even do it consciously but regardless everyone can see I got options.

And no I don't have loads of money or status etc.

[–]TheJim66Red God-Emperor of Slut Country 5 points6 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

Yeah,no.I was always above average SMV but because I was a good and honest dude my successes were few and far between and my relationships sucked.By adopting asshole,selfish behaviour and abundance mentality and holding frame all my girl problems were resolved.Dont try to reverse the genders and think that what works for you will work for women.Men and women like different things

[–]decoy88Men and Women are similar -1 points0 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

Can you describe the “asshole, selfish behaviour” you adopted?

[–]TheJim66Red God-Emperor of Slut Country 0 points1 point  (7 children) | Copy Link

Sure.I don't take what women say seriously.I don't try to hide things that would make them jealous .I don't express my love or things like that(or rather I do very sparingly).I don't compromise.I am not understanding.I don't try to communicate in fights I withdraw attention.I act like they are easily replaceable.

[–]decoy88Men and Women are similar 0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy Link

Strange. I do most of that minus the asshole pretending shit and get the same results.

[–]TheJim66Red God-Emperor of Slut Country -1 points0 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Hmm then you are acting like an asshole.

[–]decoy88Men and Women are similar 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy Link

Nah it’s just called having a spine. One can stand up for themselves without being a dick

[–]TheJim66Red God-Emperor of Slut Country 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

How the fuck do you define what I said as having a spine and not being an asshole?Do you treat your friends the same way?

[–]decoy88Men and Women are similar 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

Sure.I don't take what women say seriously.

Asshole... maybe? Depends if they chatting shot or not. If they are, then of course not, who would? I take shit like withdrawn consent seriously. Playing hard to get just makes me walk away.

I don't try to hide things that would make them jealous.

A person’s jealousy is their own issue. Not hiding the truth doesn’t make you an asshole.

I don't express my love or things like that(or rather I do very sparingly).

Not very asshole, this is neutral.

I don't compromise.I am not understanding.I don't try to communicate in fights I withdraw attention.

All assholely

I act like they are easily replaceable.

Depends on context. Is it gf or fuckbuddy?

[–]TheJim66Red God-Emperor of Slut Country 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Asshole... maybe? Depends if they chatting shot or not. If they are, then of course not, who would? I take shit like withdrawn consent seriously. Playing hard to get just makes me walk away.

I mean their complaints and shit like that.Also yeah I don't take their playing hard to get seriously.(no rapist).But metoo shit hasn't catch on so much in my country.

A person’s jealousy is their own issue. Not hiding the truth doesn’t make you an asshole.

I would say not caring if you make a woman ,you supposedly care about ,jealous is assholey.

Depends on context. Is it gf or fuckbuddy?

Both.

So,you DONT do most of these things?

[–]decoy88Men and Women are similar 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Guess not.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

I posit that many women dont actually enjoy hopping back on the CC, getting pumped and dumped a few times or potentially getting creeped on, accumulating stalkers, having a new relationship where the guy turns out to be a dud and aging 2 more years in the interim, etc.

Yes, they have the power to go out and get a fresh dick, tonight, no questions asked, no strings. Most women actually prefer staying in a stable relationship with a vetted guy (you) or they would already be gone. That means you do in fact hold some power, assuming you actually got into a relationship, or even got somewhere in that territory where she's thinking of you as that guy maybe worth start a relationship with.

For women, the relationship IS the goal and the sex is just a byproduct, for the man it's sex and the relationship is the byproduct. Women can get sex and relationships easily, but they won't necessarily be with quality men. Even some men who seem quality may be abusive or whatever. So yeah, she doesn't have all the "walk away power" in the world assuming your RMV is roughly even to her SMV.

I don't even know if acting alpha helps in relationships as far as making the woman give you sex more, but it DOES help for gaining more power, and in turn, preserving your sanity. All you kids don't understand that women (once you live with her) have this instinctive urge to drive you absolutely insane. They don't even know they're doing it, but they will. They'll nag, they'll start in on problems whenever you're trying to relax, when you try to get something done they'll insist they want to relax, they'll wake you up early and go take a nap afterward. They will refuse to do things or insist on doings things just because they didn't like your tone and started to feel stubborn. Absurd, ridiculous shit. They will question every aspect of your life and identity and try to eke maximum value out of you. Being alpha stops this quickly and re-routes her behavior to more compliant, docile, manageable levels (though still low-level irritating).

I can't speak to actually getting chicks, because honestly, that part is absurdly easy compared to how some men make it out to be. Overcome your social phobia, act suave and get some numbers. Go on dates, k-close, f-close. Repeat. At least some women in your range will say yes, and are hoping for you to actually approach them, but you never do lol. You don't need to act "alpha" for this. Beta goofball does the job fine as long as you have something going for you, be it charm, wit, passion, or whatever. Something eye catching to draw her attention. Add safety and excitement to that, basically operant condition her to make her want to be with you more frequently, and sex will come.

[–]rightmeow63 points [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link

women (once you live with her) have this instinctive urge to drive you absolutely insane.

PEOPLE tend to drive you insane when you live with them: roommates, siblings, parents, spouses, bf/gf, kids. that said, your wife sounds like my ESFJ roommate and she drives me up a fucking wall with her constant nagging more so than anyone else i've ever lived with...and i've lived with a lot of different people.

[–]decoy88Men and Women are similar 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah it’s why I’m playing with the idea of separate living spaces even throughout marriage

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I don't even know if acting alpha helps in relationships as far as making the woman give you sex more, but it DOES help for gaining more power, and in turn, preserving your sanity. All you kids don't understand that women (once you live with her) have this instinctive urge to drive you absolutely insane. They don't even know they're doing it, but they will. They'll nag, they'll start in on problems whenever you're trying to relax, when you try to get something done they'll insist they want to relax, they'll wake you up early and go take a nap afterward. They will refuse to do things or insist on doings things just because they didn't like your tone and started to feel stubborn. Absurd, ridiculous shit. They will question every aspect of your life and identity and try to eke maximum value out of you. Being alpha stops this quickly and re-routes her behavior to more compliant, docile, manageable levels (though still low-level irritating).

My wife hasn't regressed to this stage... yet. But even with our marriage having progressed to raising teenaged kids you can never say never.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Ive learned my wife is a control freak. I once thought women were all like her (my mother is too) but some of her friends are remarkably chill... though still bullshit for other reasons

[–]TheReformist94 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy Link

Don't think so. I see where you're coming from and somewhat agree, but women love riding the CC when it's on their terms.

The fact they chose when to enter an LTR after a spin on the CC shows they have abundance. Not men. They enter ltr when the. Cost benefit ratio suits them

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Dude, you can do that too. Just dont commit.

[–]rightmeow63 points [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link

but women love riding the CC when it's on their terms.

i don't know any females around my age (25) who have just fucked around for as long as possible at the expense of any relationships. usually it's more like: LTR, eventual break up for whatever reason, fuck around for a while until you find another suitable LTR...rinse and repeat until you meet your eventual spouse.

like do you think most women wait until they're 30 to enter an LTR?

[–]TheReformist94 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

You just answered it in your final line. They push LTR to th absolute limit so they can maximize as much cock and variety as possible before boring marriage

[–]sadomasochristNo pull out game 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Arrogance and narcissism are positively correlated on studies of female arousal. Btfo 🤷🏼‍♂️

[–]The3liGator 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Inb4, studies aren't real life

Actually, inb4, no response

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

I agree with you - to an extent.

You are correct that not every man is going to be spinning 12 plates and going home to a wife terrified of being dumped (and I would say that not every man desires this).

But I disagree with you on two counts: that certain strategies only work for high SMV men, and that women wouldn't like "douche bags" because you, a man, don't like douche bags.

  1. Only high SMV men can play the game. I disagree. Sexual market value for a man is highly variable - job, attitude, dress, shape - and all these variables can be improved on if you dedicate yourself to it.

Not only that, but context comes into play. What is a high SMV? Depends on the market - who are you trying to woo? Where are you? Who is the competition?

  1. Women don't like douche bags.

Once again, I disagree. Well, not really. No one likes a prick, and being one doesn't earn you any affection, but being determined, self-assured, confident and decisive do.

Women's social interactions are exactly that: social. They are polite, non-commital, friendly and diplomatic. Men are more physical, building bonds through action and experiences.

That us why you, as a man, seek a woman that is nice, friendly, peppy, comforting - that is what you lack.

Now, when a woman seeks a man, do you think she seeks one that behaves just like her female friends, or something different? Something manly?

Because the two genders are different, and we seek different things in our partners than we seek from our friends.

[–]Atlas_B_Shruggin✡️🐈✡️ the purring jew 2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

that women wouldn't like "douche bags" because you, a man, don't like douche bags.

this cant be repeated enough

"asshole" and "douchebag" are how MEN perceive the types of confident "jerks" who get women, not how WOMEN perceive them

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

This reminds me of high school lol , anyone slightly loud and social was a jerk and a 🚿, according to the kids who rather attend programming class rather than play sports

[–]Atlas_B_Shruggin✡️🐈✡️ the purring jew 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

yup

[–]CainPrice 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

A lot of this depends on the women. If you're an ugly-faced fat guy, acting like a confident asshole toward a bunch of hot-bodied, 22-year-old college cheerleaders isn't going to get you anywhere. Nor will acting like a nice guy.

But acting like a confident asshole toward a chunky 6 and her slutty friend who are trolling bars for hookups will get you laid, while acting like a nice guy who wants to make friends and date her will get you ignored.

[–]Atlas_B_Shruggin✡️🐈✡️ the purring jew 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yes that's why RP/MRP 101 is to up your SMV

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (24 children) | Copy Link

I do find this to be true.

My ex - who read RP and I can tell it was in his mindset thought being an asshole meant being straight to the point "manly alpha male, no body can tell me nothing" attitude and it was disgusting. I was instantly turned off.

I know he turned to TRP being a tall skinny guy. Virgin until 21, only had one gf that was essentially long distance for 3 years, and decided to spin plates then he met me. When I used to go on his phone I saw some of the people he fucked and wow. They were ugly. I know he did it to find self worth within himself but play it off as "yah I fuck those girls, no love in this" I am hands down the best looking girl he has ever been with but he is not the best looking guy I have been with.

We dated for a year and a bit. His asshole behavior honestly became too much and you can tell that he had 0 game. Everything was almost like a checklist and guideline he was following, esp since I started coming onto this sub and reading more it, it was like a joke. He had 0 social skills and I realized I was finding out reasons as to why he turned to it in the first place.

Some guys who read TRP think it is a godsent for how to deal with women. But it's not. If you don't naturally have game, if you're always trying to prove yourself and it will probably only work on ugly plates. So don't try to go into a relationship with the mindset. Trust me - the girl will see right through you.

[–]Atlas_B_Shruggin✡️🐈✡️ the purring jew 5 points6 points  (14 children) | Copy Link

he got you to fuck him for a year lol

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (13 children) | Copy Link

Something he will never do again lol he's lucky I put up with him

[–]Atlas_B_Shruggin✡️🐈✡️ the purring jew 5 points6 points  (10 children) | Copy Link

if he could fuck you, he can fuck another you, for a few months or a year. this is what RP men want lol

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

He can fuck whoever he wants to, but he can never pull another quality woman like me.

He was confused. RP but wanted a relationship

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

“A quality woman like me” , I like your confidence lol

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lmao thank you! It is 100% true and I stand by it

[–]The3liGator 0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy Link

He already pulled you, didn't he?

What makes you think he can't pull someone like you?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

He pulled me, but like I said - when we met Ill be honest I had low self esteem and I basically settled for him for that one year and a bit until I got fed up. It was probably one of my worse relationships yet

He can try again, but I know for a fact they will never measure up to me. He was lucky to get someone like me and that was when I was at my lowest. Any self assured woman will turn him away.

He will probably pull some girls. He's tall, alright looking and makes 6 figures. He will find girls that want him primarily for his money and probably fuck around on the side. He can't maintain a solid fulfilling relationship.

That's what I mean when I say, once people who follow these RP find a woman worth keeping their mind is already so fucked, past insecurity leaks out and they can't have a proper LTR unless they try to unlearn some of the shit they read

[–]The3liGator 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy Link

There you go. He can probably find another girl who is in the same place as you were.

He might not be looking for a long-term "fulfilling" relationship.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

Oh yes he will, I never once doubted that.

If we wants to fuck around he will probably find some chicks. They way out relationship was going it was serious and he wanted something long term - talks of engagement, parents meeting, buying a house, kids all discussed on a mutual basis.

When he is looking for someone to do that with again - he is going to have major issues. Hence we will never find someone like me

[–]The3liGator 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

He will have major issues, he will get nothing more than sex. That is all he wants. Mission accomplished. RP works.

[–]The3liGator 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

He only want 60 more people to do what you did, and he'll be set for life.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

That's fine. But it's not like he will get a quality woman again - like he wanted to be long term with

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

I am hands down the best looking girl he has ever been with but he is not the best looking guy I have been with.

Funny. I never heard a woman admit the contrary.

Regardless, if he got you, he can fuck another one like you.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

Oh trust me we were already a few months deep when I saw the other people he was with and it struck a chord. I knew he was lucky af. He knows it too.

Nah, he can't. Ill admit that I had low confidence when we started dating and that's a reason he got me. Like I said before, he can't pull another woman like me, for a relationship. That's why he is still on my line calling me.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy Link

I am pretty sure there's other insecure women.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy Link

I never said he can't ever get sex. He will get sex.

When he is looking for another relationship like we had, and to plan a future with them he won't find someone like me. He can and will only find insecure women. That's sad, on the level of his game and what he is going to deal with later on. But to each their own. He can probably drown in pussy if he wants to but will never attain an adult relationship.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy Link

Sorry to say but it sounds like you're not over this guy.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

LOL wthell kind of projection is this.

I'm explaining exactly why I broke up with him and why I know he never get over me. I have been over him for a while. I'm sharing my experiences. Just because I can talk about myself in a positive light doesn't mean that I'm not over him.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

Well, it seems critical to you that he's "never going to fine an amazing woman" like you,and he "fucked a lot of ugly women" before he got in a relationship with you (funny that... all the others he bagged were ugly, except you) and that he's a "red-pilled looser"....

Yeah

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

no its not critical, its the truth lol is that a problem?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Not at all. I was being a dick. It's none of my business.

[–]frankcastlesteinEgalitarian 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

What kind of incomprehensible, retarded incel bullshit are you on about? This whole sub has become some stupid incel circle jerk echo chamber. You want a girlfriend? Stop being a repulsive douchebag who tries to generalize women into your made up categories, newsflash Women are people.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

And now let's talking about acting alpha/macho. I don't think it works for every man either.

Why? Simply switch position. Would you feel more attracted to a girl if she's nasty or mean to you, or you get turned on more by a girl who's nice to you?

Where does it say anywhere that "Alpha" means being an asshole.

Have boundaries instead of bending over backwards and letting a woman walk all over you is not being an asshole, its having boundaries.

[–]ScootsScoots2 points [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link

Abundance mentality and "acting" alpha in the beginning are the early stages of becoming high value as one changes themselves and their outlook on the world.

You're right in the sense that it wont help unless it's being done to ACTUALLY change.

Lifting at the gym and still being a social sperg wont help anyone.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lifting at the gym and still being a social sperg wont help anyone.

Lifting gives you the confidence to be less of a sperg....sometimes.

[–]blackedoutfastRed Pill Man 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I think I'd get more intelligential feedback/debate here compared to there.

your theories are garbage because you're trying to predict human behavior based on what would be the most logical and rational response, when in the real world attraction isn't based on logic at all.

[–]RoninCDN 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Are you implying women and men can be illogical sometimes? /s

[–]HumanSockPuppetEqual-Opportunity Oppressor 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Sounds like you tried this once or twice unsuccessfully, and now you're looking for an easy excuse for your failures.

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[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yep. But you should do it anyways. I'm 2/10 on my best day but I act like I've got balls that drag the ground. I certainly don't treat women any differently than anyone else, which is to say I treat them like shit and walk over them to get what I want. It hasn't changed that I'm fundamentally unattractive to women but it has helped my career and life in general.

[–]est-la-luneKinda cute kinda rock 'n' roll 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Your theory is pretty much correct. We're not attracted to men because they're assholes, but men who have value.

What I disagree with is that there are other ways to signal abundance and value rather than being an "asshole", and that these are strategies that average men can use to be successful with average women.

Women are taught that attractive men are the highest value (e.g. Prince Charming). And that's sometimes true, but sometimes not true. I've met plenty of attractive men who have dead-end jobs, are complete dunces, and assholes. Men who are average-looking absolutely can compensate by demonstrating high value.

Average is a 5. An average-looking guy who is moderately intelligent, has a good job, works out, takes care of his appearance, and is confident/develops leadership ability is doing the male equivalent of putting on makeup. By comparison an average-looking guy who is sloppy, has no job, is overweight, and acts desperate is going to be perceived as ≤4 with a low RMV.

People who are insecure signal insecurity through appearance and mannerisms. Conversely, people who are valuable signal value through appearance and mannerisms.

And people who are secure because they know what they bring to the table are more attractive, period. Women have no problem being with "ugly" men who have money, just look at models who are dating those old men.

For the average guy, the key is not to be an asshole (don't make her feel insecure) but also don't pander to her (set boundaries and show your value, so she knows that she's lucky to have you).

Easier said than done? Of course. But unless you're trying to date way outside your league, there's no reason this doesn't work.

[–]truespirit89 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I’m 5 foot 6 unemployed average dick and average body and black presenting I’m half black. I Had a hard time pulling any girls till I learned about red pill. Now I try to meet a new girls online every few weeks. I’ve never gone more than a date without having sex of some kind.
I’m definitely faking it mostly. I use my moms car to get around. The issue is I know I can’t maintain these women for more than a few fucks, it would be too expensive. But ya I’m a gamma type dude and I still get it In a lot and have fun.

Just message a few girls a day on pof simply saying hey. If you are fun to be around and not clingy they’ll probably suck your dick.

I’d say it’s abudance mentality because every night I tell myself I could care less if I see any of them ever again, there will be a new one eventually. And they are literally all the same.

(disclaimer, these are bigger girls but I’ve fucked smaller girls too and honestly it’s not much different. Big girls suck dick like professionals and that’s a fact.)

[–]RoninCDN 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

This seems really contingent on your perception of high value in males.

[–]SepeanRed Pill Man 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm open to the idea that some men are too weak to be alpha.

But anyone who has a bit of balls somewhere in them will see huge improvements. You're way, way overestimating how much it takes for alpha to work. Sure, getting the top girls isn't for everyone, but so what? Most guys can man up and easily pull girls that were previously out of their league and spin plates.

And you're completely wrong on your asshole theory. And you're not supposed to be an asshole anyway.

[–]OutOfOranges[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (2 children) | Copy Link

Removed. CMV posts require the OP to stick around and debate people, Not rant and leave.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy Link

[permanently deleted]

[–]OutOfOranges[M] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

You only made a single reply, that is not "some". Also that single reply was removed for incivilty.

You did not attempt to debate the topic in good faith, hence the removel.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

and before you say "oh but if you did get another one, then the current one leaving wouldn't be a big deal right?" WRONG! Because what would be your plan for this new one then? Flirt with another chick or get another new one? Then the circle just repeats itself, so whats the point? Might as well just stick to the original one and saving all these troubles huh?

I think you're perhaps unclear on RP's goal. It is indeed for the "circle to just repeat itself" in the form of spinning plates indefinitely. RP does not favor long term relationships, and does not think "sticking to the original" works just as well and saves trouble, but rather has its own, greater trouble.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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