New study shows unmarried couples living apart have the highest levels of sexual satisfaction

abaxeron · 2019-05-12T22:16:19+00:00

it also allows breathing room to not be annoyed by one another’s more mundane idiosyncrasies.

Definitely this, imo.

I don't know how bad things are "in the West", but here in Eastern Europe (especially its post-communist parts), it's common for entire generations of people to live their lives never having a separate room. You can take any set of bestie-bestie-besties in existence, and if you force them to share an area small enough, they will start having conflicts.

TheBookOfSeil · 2019-05-13T01:34:19+00:00

I agree with Katherine Hepburn when she said “Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.”

philomexa · 2019-05-13T03:55:03+00:00

My husband goes on tour for 3-6 week spurts; I get my much needed solitude, he gets to immerse himself in his 'world', we both get to miss each other, and when he returns the sex is 🔥🔥🔥.

I don't think men and women should be all up in each other's space, I think a little distance is necessary to maintain the sort of....I don't know, gendered polarity that makes sex exciting.

exit_sandman · 2019-05-12T22:21:12+00:00

I haven't read the study, but I would assume that a few factors contribute to this dynamic: unmarried and separately living couples

are generally younger
haven't been together as long
usually don't have kids
due to a lack of proximity they are more likely to jump one another when they have the opportunity

Unless the study controlled for these variables, this isn't exactly unexpected.

TheJim66 · 2019-05-12T22:11:20+00:00

Familiarity is the death of lust

Willow-girl · 2019-05-13T00:44:31+00:00

She's not picking up his socks!

MoodyBrizo · 2019-05-12T22:04:11+00:00

To the shock and surprise of no one. You don't have time to get sick of each other.

crackrocksteady7 · 2019-05-13T00:54:39+00:00

I keep showing articles like these to my wife and suggesting we take our relationship back to its exciting previous phase. She laughs. I tell her I’m not joking though. She laughs harder.

What do PPD members?

DocNMarty · 2019-05-13T05:05:05+00:00

Dr. Josh Keyes : I'm married to my work.

Serge Leveque : So am I. Which makes my wife my mistress. That's why I'm still in love with her.

- "The Core"

GridReXX · 2019-05-13T00:00:10+00:00

Unmarried people living apart tend to be young, hot and without responsibilities or children. Of course the 23 year old college kids are going to be having more sex than the 40 year old couple with pre teen kids and real jobs.

nevomintoarce · 2019-05-13T06:51:55+00:00

But I think the living apart part plays a major role too — living apart builds up physical lust; and it also allows breathing room to not be annoyed by one another’s more mundane idiosyncrasies.

I agree with this. Even when you really like someone, they start getting on your nerves if you see them all the time and especially if they have annoying or gross habits.

TheSuperStink · 2019-05-12T22:47:32+00:00

Seems to work well for the fiancée and myself. She travels overseas for work 4-6 months per year.

The sex is great!

TheMedsPeds · 2019-05-13T13:16:37+00:00

Makes absolute sense considering how human nature works.

Compare it to Disney world. A person living in Orlando who has money could just randomly go to Disney world on any day off. I am sure it's still enjoyable but it doesn't illicit the same response as some person living in Colorado who can only go maybe once a year or so.

Absence makes the heart grow founder. If you only see your S/O on the weekends, you miss them, the sexual tension builds. You don't get annoyed with their everday normal human annoyances. This is probably one of the most "common sensey" topics I have ever seen on this board.

NicholasLeo · 2019-05-14T16:24:55+00:00

Looks like the Spartans had it right. They required married couples to live separately, and conduct their sex life as tho it were an illicit affair. Any sex had to involve sneaking around.

beachredwhine · 2019-05-12T22:40:39+00:00

65 entire people have actually read that study. I can't read it the website wants $43 for me to be able to read it for 24 hours. A psychologist wrote it though, and based on the article xe wrote about it linked from /r/ Science!^tm it looks like the author has a serious anti marriage agenda.

Being unable to actually read the actual study without paying $43 means that this is yet another study I will simply write off as propaganda. With the Scientific!^tm field of psychology having only a 25% reproducibility rate for their official Science!^tm studies as well... I'll just say if it looks like a (((duck))) , quacks like a duck, and has written an entire book based on interviews about how great it is to be single and never have any kids in a field notorious for publishing utter bullshit...

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2019-05-12T23:11:55+00:00

No duh

YouSeeWhereBradAt · 2019-05-12T21:56:26+00:00

I can explain it for you but I can't understand it for you.

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CatchPhraze · 2019-05-12T23:38:56+00:00

No. New realshionships have the happiest people and the honeymoon phase. New realshionships don't have cohabiting.

Ergo best realshionships. But even that will fade with time.

IndigoPill · 2019-05-13T11:44:20+00:00

If you get better quality sleep your life is going to be better. Having someone rolling around and disrupting your sleep will inevitably have a negative effect.

Also, have your own life. A marriage or partnership works best if you have your own lives and an intersection between, share your life, not become theirs.

donkeydodo · 2019-05-13T11:59:12+00:00

Well, out of a redpill perspective; as soon as a woman can take your commission for granted, she'll partly lose respect for you and she won't have to pay for your commission with her pussy anymore. Sex will be thriving if the woman in a said relationship is uncertain whether she can keep a man or not; if she's not sure, she will try to hold him in check (with her pussy).

So yes, living apart DO play a roll, but kids do also play a role, and depending on how the man treats his woman while she's pregnant will be very relevant the closest 20 years after the kid(s) have been born.

Women in their nature are emotionally ruled. Women, in general, don't care about a man's feelings; she cares about the feelings that a man will make her feel. When she has her kids, her feelings won't be elevated by her man only anymore per se, because the children will also have the same effect, so unless a said man has condemned enough respect from a said woman, he won't get sex from and with her.

eet_mijnen_schijt · 2019-05-13T13:46:56+00:00

Almost all humans that live together long enough seem to start to annoy each other; this also includes parent–child relationships. I'm pretty sure that is because humans are actually pretty much to the man awful and you can more effectively ignore that if you don't constantly see each other.

darudeboysandstorm · 2019-05-13T16:29:29+00:00

I bet sex would be even better if you got a new partner every year or two.

[deleted] · 2019-05-13T20:10:27+00:00

So why get married? They're just fwb.

GridReXX · 2019-05-12T22:40:03+00:00

You mean single, non-committed people have a lot of sex because the woman never gets comfortable and closes up shop?