TheRedArchive

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Writeup of an article from The Telegraph

Many experts now believe monogamy is a tighter fit for women than for men. This Christmas give your wife something she really wants. Something truly exciting. A hall pass.

Starting from the premise that we're only now beginning to understand women's sexuality properly, she explains that contrary to popular opinion, women tire of their sexual partners faster than men, and need just as much sexual adventure and novelty as their male counterparts - if not more. To support this theory, she draws on a range of relatively recent scientific and social scientific studies, as well as interviews with experts on female infidelity in a range of fields, and plenty of "untrue" women themselves

https://i.stuff.co.nz/life-style/love-sex/109222694/should-wives-be-given-a-cheat-pass-at-christmas

If this is true, wouldn't it suggest that monogamy is a losing proposition? What kind of man who values himself will sign up for a marriage where he needs to give his wife a "cheat pass" because she's tired of him sexually?

On the other hand, maybe it isn't true?


[–]buarthaDelights in homosexuality91 points92 points  (57 children) | Copy Link

In case it wasn't obvious, for the love of all that is holy, don't do this. If you offer this to a woman who *wasn't* thinking of straying it risks her thinking you don't love or value her enough to care if she fucks around on you and that will potentially wreck your relationship in the long term.

[–]wekacuckstupid buggy bot23 points24 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I assume my wife would think I was fishing for permission or announcing my intention to cheat on her.

[–]beachredwhineCongratulations!9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

No kidding the first thing my wife would do is stay up late, steal my phone, and phone stalk me. Then she'd start calling me at work all day and freaking out when I just hang up on her. Then she'd start going to the places I work at, which is a lot of places, and scoping people out. Demanding that I take her to those places on my off time so other girls can see her there with me.

[–]heycool-2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Good point, I can see that happening to people.

[–]Alth12Purple Pill Man18 points19 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Not to mention the self esteem hit if she jumped at the chance too readily.

[–]PennnyLameMade a margarita once34 points35 points  (15 children) | Copy Link

Yeah if my husband offered this, I would FLIP OUT.

[–]Oncefa2SJW-1 points0 points  (13 children) | Copy Link

Calm down there, we're all adults here, let's try to act that way.

[–]PennnyLameMade a margarita once11 points12 points  (12 children) | Copy Link

I wish the men here would develop the modicum of emotional intelligence required to differentiate between a) predictions about an emotional response to one’s spouse behaviors and b) the non-existent fucks given about the users/content here.

[–]Oncefa2 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

Your prediction about how you would react in this situation is childish and lacking self control.

[–]GuyDudeHey 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

Dude you sound like a fucking blast to hang out with.

[–]PennnyLame 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

And your judgement is ignorant and lacking understanding of being in an LTR where both parties actually want to be there.

[–]Oncefa2 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

People with your type of personality tend to make terrible LTRs. I usually look for women who have better character and a semblance of self control.

[–]PennnyLame 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

I’ll be sure to tell my husband about your declaration. I’m sure he’ll give so many fucks. Why don’t you take your personal attacks elsewhere? Bad debate tactics. Tut tut.

[–]Oncefa2 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

You're the person who attacked me. All I said was that your reaction was childish, which it is. There are way too many women out there who lack any kind of self control.

[–][deleted]  (3 children) | Copy Link

[removed]

[–]RedPill-BlackLotusRed Pill Man-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

He would only be offering that if he already had someone in mind HE wants to fuck lol.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (35 children) | Copy Link

Could be useful. If she's looking to cheat, offering her a free pass and her taking it would give you a chance to dump her. She might think you're sneaking a way to get a free pass yourself though so it could backfire .

[–]wekacuckstupid buggy bot16 points17 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Why not just dump her then? Why do you need to shit test her first...

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I was being a bit sardonic. But it could work as a shit test. Even if you were being serious, a lot of women would immediately think it were a test though anyway. So not a great shit test even

[–]donttoleratebullshit0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

You needa know if she’s cheating right

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (30 children) | Copy Link

If she is going to cheat, she's going to cheat. Giving her a pass isn't going to change anything here.

[–]Nodoxxintoxin8 points9 points  (25 children) | Copy Link

You don’t know women. This could easily end up “yeah, you think I want to cheat do you, or do you just want to cheat on me! I’ll show you”

Many otherwise faithful and monogamous women would take this suggestion as an affront to their very being, just as much of an affront as a guy asking permission to cheat.

Source, I’m a woman. If my husband ever suggests this, I’d be tempted to do it right in front of his face with the hottest guy I find and then I would cry.

Well, in reality I would probably just cry.

[–]CityFarming4 points5 points  (18 children) | Copy Link

About sums up women

[–]Nodoxxintoxin7 points8 points  (17 children) | Copy Link

By and large, most women don’t want a guy who is willing to share us.

[–]PennnyLameMade a margarita once9 points10 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

I think men forget that a man being willing to share a woman who is committed to him has historically been because he does not value her- pimps share their whores, husbands don’t share wives. How this became a mythical female fantasy is beyond me.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Check out cuckold and hotwife subs.

[–]PennnyLameMade a margarita once3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Y’all need to stop referencing activity on porn subs as evidence that any significant amount of regular people (women) are into these behaviors.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

5% of the US population have had identified as swingers themselves at some point in their lives.https://askwonder.com/q/statistics-demographics-and-size-of-the-lifestyle-swinger-market-57daf90faec4161a008a7d8f

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

What about so many hotwives on reddit?

[–]donttoleratebullshit0 points1 point  (9 children) | Copy Link

Really?

Why’s fucking everything I see out of women online and otherwise just seem to be obsession with hot guys?

[–]Nodoxxintoxin0 points1 point  (8 children) | Copy Link

Two entirely different things! Even if they want that hot guy, they don’t want one who is willing to loan them out. They want to feel valued, not like a disposable commodity. Most couples have at least a small touch of mate guarding dynamic.

Taken to an extreme it can be completely dysfunctional This is such a well known phenomenon that it’s called “let’s you and him fight.” Crazy couples will take this to an extreme, she flirts, he overreacts and blames the other guy, she “feels special “ that he is willing to fight to mate guard, he gets to feel like macho man alpha but not letting some other guy turn him into a cuck.

Few couples in the modern world are able to operate without any sexual jealousy.

[–]donttoleratebullshit0 points1 point  (7 children) | Copy Link

If you were an ugly guy in this and today’s context what would you do? Would you go mgtow?

[–]Nodoxxintoxin0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy Link

Could you fall in love with a looks match girl? Average looks?

Don’t do online dating, stay away from social media, try to find a looks match girl through shared activities and friends. Be as social as possible, meet as many people as possible. And maximize what you do have. Play sports. Seriously...play sports.

If you are overweight in the slightest, get in shape! So many guys are overweight these days, just being in shape starts you out as a 5. Good luck

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Well, in reality I would probably just cry.

Thanks for proving my point? I would think the woman that weren't thinking of cheating would be mad if their husband/boyfriend did this. Where as those thinking of cheating or looking to cheat it wouldn't matter any.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

If my husband ever suggests this, I’d be tempted to do it right in front of his face with the hottest guy I find and then I would cry.

wat

[–]Nodoxxintoxin0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

Calm down, hyperbole.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

don't get snippy

I don't understand "I'd do this and then I'd cry"

But then, maybe I'm not intended to understand it.

[–]Nodoxxintoxin0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

“Tempted” to do this.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

k

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

Course it is. You see if she would cheat given the chance.

[–]FalseBuddhaSomething borrowed, something Blue2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

It's not cheating if you give them a hall pass.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah true. Makes you the bad guy if you break it off then.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

No its not going to change anything. As you said yourself she will cheat given the chance if she wanted to. Giving her permission to isn't going to change that as she still needs to find a guy to cheat with.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Ah the joys of current year

[–]jackandjill22Red Pill misanthropic, contrarian1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

One of my favourite BP's.

[–]sadomasochristnAWALT = Not red pilled54 points55 points  (103 children) | Copy Link

I really wish they'd turn this stuff up to eleven and saturate mediums with this. That would end all of this really quick. This stuff really poisons their cause, we need more of it.

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

She said the quiet part out loud

[–]misanthropicelBlue Pill Woman2 points3 points  (100 children) | Copy Link

Cuck porn has exploded, so I doubt that it would really hurt them.

[–]PennnyLameMade a margarita once16 points17 points  (99 children) | Copy Link

Cucking is a male fantasy. Stop pretending women en masse are into this shit.

[–]petrichordiummidsommar pill13 points14 points  (92 children) | Copy Link

Cucking may be a male fantasy, but rising interest in non monogamy is larger and less gendered than that.

[–]PennnyLameMade a margarita once9 points10 points  (89 children) | Copy Link

And dudes on the mansphere like to call all non-monogamy “cucking” as a way to frame it as a female fantasy. I would also wager non-monogamy is hardly female driven.

[–][deleted]  (87 children) | Copy Link

[deleted]

[–]PennnyLameMade a margarita once4 points5 points  (86 children) | Copy Link

Your boys don’t agree and I hardly think this strategy is as prevalent as is claimed here.

[–]KrispyMcSockingtonPillar of the community6 points7 points  (85 children) | Copy Link

The high rate of single motherhood tends to say otherwise...

[–]PennnyLameMade a margarita once7 points8 points  (67 children) | Copy Link

I wish you guys could stay on topic. The leap required to take the existence of single motherhood to prove women looking for non-monagmy after marriage is absurd.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (62 children) | Copy Link

Check nonmonogany and polyamory subreddits . Many times wives want an open relationship.

[–]KrispyMcSockingtonPillar of the community1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

It is on topic. Sleeping with one type of man, without commitment, then expecting a different type to commit after a kid is born isn't exactly monogamous. It also refers to the female sexual strategy that the previous poster mentioned.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Let them be they want their fantasies to be realities.

[–]sublimemongrelBecky, Esq.4 points5 points  (11 children) | Copy Link

Single motherhood is not cuckolding wth

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (10 children) | Copy Link

Providing even a modicum of financial benefit to a single mother a man is dating is, however, literally cucking.

[–]unicorns-Married Feminist-1 points0 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

This isn't /r/whineaboutsinglemothers. A few people on here seem obsessed with that topic. It has nothing to do with this post. Dating a single mother is not cucking.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Dating a single mother is not cucking.

Providing even a modicum of financial benefit to a single mother a man is dating is, however, literally cucking.

[–]petrichordiummidsommar pill5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I think lazy, poorly informed “hey that sounds cool” non monogamy brings the boys out until the reality sets in.

But as someone who has spent the last 15 years among the weirdos and deviants, I truly believe that among stabilized and functional open relationships, women are active and enthusiastic agents of non monogamy at parity.

[–]unicorns-Married Feminist2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Women who cheat usually aren't into cucking though. In fact, a lot of women who do it only go along with it because it's their husband's fetish.

[–]petrichordiummidsommar pill2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

But between cheating and cucking, there are a lot of poly women who are that way very much of their own imperative

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Women en masse are into finding a Chad and marrying him.
Women en masse are into monkey branching to a higher value partner, not cucking a lower value one.

[–]Alth12Purple Pill Man4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Even for men as well it's just a fantasy. Stories abound online of how the reality is something the men who had the fantasy themselves hated.

[–]PennnyLameMade a margarita once3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Right and that men don’t like their fantasy turned reality doesn’t make it a female fantasy.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy Link

[deleted]

[–]unicorns-Married Feminist2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

An acquaintance of mine was into that before cucking became a popular thing. He'd get in touch with married couples on Craiglist, Fetlife, or swinger sites, and sleep with guy's wives, sometimes with the husband watching, sometimes not.

He liked it because it was no-commitment sex for him. He was kind of skinny, socially awkward, and nerdy, and wasn't comfortable approaching women in bars, and hook-up apps like Tinder didn't really exist then, so while he wasn't really into the whole "husband watching" aspect, he saw it as a way to have casual sex on a regular basis.

He was 18-19 when I knew him, he was hooking up with women anywhere from 20-50, he said most of the women doing this were younger and more attractive than their husbands.

[–]Biscoitchinhos2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

"Cucking" is mostly a male fantasy, yes. Simply sleeping with other men is the female fantasy.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It wouldn't pass, just like ACTA. People have to be boiled slowly for their agenda to work.

[–]peterlongcLove.Is.The.Drug24 points25 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Ah, the gift of destroying your marriage for the holidays. Make sure to invite the new guy over for Christmas dinner.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Christmas dinner

Ho ho ho

[–]Pope_LuciousSeparating the wheat from the hoes23 points24 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Oh well I’ll sacrifice my functional identity and personal integrity for the ever-evolving abstract idea of “female empowerment” by letting my wife fuck another dude.

Wait, or I won’t because that would undermine everything about having a wife in the first place.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Wait, or I won’t because that would undermine everything about having a wife in the first place.

When will people realize that open marriage is an oxymoron?

[–]Faulkner8918 points19 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is a classic case of trying to have your cake and eat too.

[–]AllahHatesFagsBLACK PILL MOTHERFUCKER!63 points64 points  (12 children) | Copy Link

This is just another sick and depraved attempt by feminists to justify and normalize cuckoldry. If your wife or gf ever suggests this to you, it's over and she already has the next cock on the carousel lined up.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Totally. I think what's interesting though is, if the research is true, then "wife/gf" is a losing proposition anyway. Even if she doesn't ask for this, it's what she truly wants.

[–]Barneysparky3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Why do you blame this on feminists? This is just tabloid media trying to inflame for hits.

It worked.

[–]beachredwhineCongratulations!9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I like how no one will say which particular group is responsible for pushing this disgusting degeneracy.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I mean they were citing research. Maybe it's flawed research ...who knows? Maybe time will tell, in the form of more rigorous research.

[–]alcockell1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Telegraph is a broadsheet paper. BBC is our state broadcaster.

[–]CombatStaceyBlue ovaries3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

This is just another sick and depraved attempt by feminists to justify and normalize cuckoldry.

What do you base this statement on? Can you give me links to places in which feminists are advocating for cheating and/or cuckoldry?

[–]wprtogh6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Oooh I can help! I love references.

First off, the OP link itself is on the face of it an "attempt to justify and normalize cuckoldry" by definition: Cuckold means a man whose wife sleeps with other men. So cuckoldry is, depending on context, either a form of cheating or of polyamory.

So what remains is to show that this has been going on for a while: that it's "another" attempt rather than a novel one. Okay?

Here is a cuckoldry-positive article in a major news site from a while back: https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/world-news/polyamourous-couple-reveal-what-its-11299731

Two sex-positive feminists wrote this manual in the 90's in favor of cuckoldry among other things: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Ethical_Slut

Do you want more? Or are you more bothered by the moral notion that someone regards all polyamory as "sick and depraved" than by the factual claim that a large cohort of feminists defend it?

[–]CombatStaceyBlue ovaries0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

A cuckold is a man who either gains sexual pleasure from his wife having sex with other men, or who has an adulterous wife (and he doesn't know it).

Your first link doesn't mention feminism and the men don't match the above description. They seem to just like sex with other women and are accepting of their wives having sex with other men.

I'll accept that the book mentioned in your second link was written by feminists, though there is no mention of feminism in the article. I don't see promotion of the lifestyle of having sex with many people - just acceptance of it. Again, I see no match with the definition of cuckoldry.

If you find something that has feminists telling people that cuckoldry is the way to go, then for sure, post it here.

[–]unicorns-Married Feminist-2 points-1 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Feminists, or women in general, aren't into cuckoldry. That's a male fantasy.

Go to the subreddits for any of these fetishes, and you'll find that most of the subscribers are men.

[–]PanderjitSingh_k2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Feminists often advocate for thing they don’t want for themselves. Like STEM careers.

[–]unicorns-Married Feminist0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

As I said, feminists aren’t advocating for cuckoldry. A lot advocate for couples having the right to make their own decisions about monogamy without being shamed by society, but most aren’t actively pro-cuck.

And lots of feminists (including me) do have STEM careers.

[–]AllahHatesFagsBLACK PILL MOTHERFUCKER!1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You confusing the state of cuckoldry that many men get tricked into, forced into, or, in the most pathetic cases, volunteer for with the fetish that a few depraved guys have. Cuckoldry mainly refers to a man investing his time and resources into raising another man's offspring, which is what happens when his supposed baby momma is pregnant by another man or he wifes up a single mother.

Given how feminism is pushing for normalizing polyandry, which is for all intents and purposes the same thing as cuckoldry, my point still stands.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

If women can convince themselves of stupid shit like this more, then guys could start to weed out the ones who will cheat before marriage.

[–]DaphneDK42King of LBFM12 points13 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Who are all those people who read this kind of rubbish, and what the fuck is a "cheat pass"? This is not rocket science. If your wife touch another man's dick she is your ex-wife. End of story.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Don't be so old fashioned / biggerD

[–][deleted] 23 points24 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Idiotic. That's what I think

[–]thejarjarbinks6919 points20 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Maybe there should be a pass for alimony and child support as well?

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Not to mention the 8 million young men who have permanently left the workforce.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

What do you expect. Shamed for not showing up with a college degree, shamed for not being man enough, shamed for enjoying non-mainstream hobbies (not just gaming).

Meanwhile women not only don't get shamed, but get praised for doing the exact same things.

At least in the past as a smart research assistant you could hope to start a family with a nerdy girl.

Now she's likely riding Varsity Chad's cock at lunch in the Library bathroom.
The same Chad who goes on to get his cock ridden by sorority girls at a party the same night.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

I agree. Changes to societal enforcement of sexual chastity have made a society where a large percentage of men have little to no incentive to work. It amazes me that more men in that situation haven't "opted out". I'm sure that's coming.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy Link

[deleted]

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Put unfulfilled seduction or puppy eyes tokens in to get money and free shit.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Most nerds genuinely enjoy what they do.

Some men also don't want to live on NEETbux and desire a bit of luxury (a decent car/bike, entertainment, travel, etc.)

That's why more men aren't opting out.

[–]GayLubeOilTrue Red Pill9 points10 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Good thing their isn't a secret hidden agenda to destabilize the nuclear family and replace it with the state

[–][deleted]  (87 children) | Copy Link

[deleted]

[–]Aaren_AugustineWants a Cookie18 points19 points  (15 children) | Copy Link

guise of personal freedom without responsibly or consequences.

Its a guise because no one talks about personal discipline. If people say they are free why don't they create a great marriage? You need discipline for that more often then not.

[–]the_calibre_cat15 points16 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Because you live in the age of hedonism, where people will lecture you about "empathy" and your obligations to them, but will literally never talk about personal accountability.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

Now that discipline isn't needed for survival in comfortable western nations, it's basically just another nice to have from what I can see. Another "notch on the belt", if you will. But marriage requires discipline. Which is why it is mind boggling to me how many people either underestimate the discipline required in marriage, or alternatively move forward despite knowing.

[–]peterlongcLove.Is.The.Drug3 points4 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

I'm sorry to tell you that discipline is required to accomplish anything whatsoever; that's the tragic part of living in reality.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Life's pretty easy now. You don't really need much discipline to accomplish things. Pretty minimal, really...perhaps more so if you start off from a poorer background, and increasingly less as you go up.

[–]peterlongcLove.Is.The.Drug0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

I agree with the basic sentiment. It's far less necessary for us and we take advantage of that fact. Still, there is at least an ounce of discipline in even getting out of bed I would say, taking a shower, not soiling yourself..

As we need less discipline in the majority of areas of our lives we do not train ourselves to handle the more difficult disciplines.. unfortunately, many of the most demanding disciplines are arguably the most important. Like not needing to f_ck everyone that looks good to you.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

Like not needing to f_ck everyone that looks good to you.

What's the benefit derived from not doing so (apart from avoiding social shame, which is basically a nonfactor with being able to get partners from the internet, and STDs, of which even AIDS is curable now and most others go away with a simple antibiotic, or pregnancy, which we can mulligan on with birth control or morning after pill or abortion)?

I say this knowing the hypocrisy of the fact that I shy away from women with high partner counts. But I'm me. There's nothing to prevent me from hypocrisy, after all. And I know I'm not alone in hypocrisy.

[–]peterlongcLove.Is.The.Drug2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Without digging too deep or getting moral.. I'll list a few things that I myself have noticed in my own life.

- close relationships are really quite awesome; having someone know you in and out, you know them, you feel yourself and at home with them, you grow with each other, help each other learn about themselves, she makes some good food, i fix things. Complementary, exponential.. nice, great, worth it

-kids.. stable relationship of parents is a big deal, lots of statistically proven problems with split households,etc (fucking around just leads to unstable marriages at least 75% of the time let's say; jealousy exists)

- just the sex: variety is nice, yes I get that. But, one night stands are not really ultimately very fulfilling, the sex is generally not THAT great, the grass is not particularly greener, your short term lover turns out to be a pain in the ass a lot of the time (maybe they'll develop emotions, maybe they'll blackmail you if you're otherwise taken, you could get VD, a lot of people are pretty sucky basically), they don't know you or care about you,etc... but then there's the moral stuff (like ruining people's lives, oops)

that's enough, it took me about 5 minutes to rattle off and I'm not that old or married.. so it could be a lot more impressive; but I think there's at least one reason you might consider

edit: well, I started off just meaning to talk from personal experience, then I went slightly afield, but quite a bit of that I know personally and the rest I'm pretty confident happens all the time

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I think you've made a really good case for why someone should consider preferring long term relationships. Nothing is ever black and white, I suppose. These are definitely solid experiences and that is what you are necessarily giving up when choosing the alternative of shorter term arrangements.

[–]poppy_bluAARP sent me a birthday card9 points10 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

A great marriage to some people is open. To others it’s acknowldging our spouse is still a sexually functioning being that will get turned on by other people. Cheating is a choice though and it needs to be separated from having the desire for someone else.

Vilify someone for cheating but don’t vilify them for attraction.

Trying to control your spouses thoughts and behavior to prevent cheating is like trying to control your child’s thoughts and behavior to prevent them getting in trouble. Neither one works.

[–]Aaren_AugustineWants a Cookie2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Trying to control your spouses thoughts and behavior to prevent cheating is like trying to control your child’s thoughts and behavior to prevent them getting in trouble.

Hence why I bring up personal discipline. If I'm expected to be an adult, so is she. Other's can define marriage however they wish, but I rarely see marriages that define the more challenging path, just the quickest to whatever reward they want...like a child.

[–]poppy_bluAARP sent me a birthday card0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

You mean American adults are now just perpetual teenagers? You don’t say!!

[–]AllahHatesFagsBLACK PILL MOTHERFUCKER!1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

American adults women are now just perpetual teenagers

Fixed that for you.

[–]poppy_bluAARP sent me a birthday card0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

nothing like an immature “I know you are but what am I!” reply from you to demonstrate that.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy Link

[deleted]

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The marriage pay day, so to speak, happens during the last part of life, late middle-aged to senior. That is when the true benefit is known, but this benefit is known in retrospect.

If you make it that far. Seems to me that the more realistic route is to simply pair off with someone during the last part of life.

[–][deleted]  (4 children) | Copy Link

[deleted]

[–]poppy_bluAARP sent me a birthday card5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Gaming and bedding women for an average man is probably equally as exhausting as being married to one.

This made me LOL and now everyone on the train thinks I’m crazy.

True dat though

[–]passepar2t2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You still have to keep your game strong as a husband if you want to fight complacency and waning interest. It's exhausting either way.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

The problem with passing on marriage is where is the average guy going to get a consistent sex supply. Gaming and bedding women for an average man is probably equally as exhausting as being married to one.

This is just not true. I do think men enter into marriage thinking it's true, but for one thing, it's a lot easier to treat someone like you're excited about them when you're actually excited about them, which you would be for new partners.

However I will admit that the stakes are higher in a marriage. You're probably not losing half your shit if you get shot down at the bar.

More work, more pretending someone is exciting just to keep things alive.

Gaming and bedding women may be a lot of work, but it is way less effort than marriage, and way less painful effort when you consider that marriage involves pretending your partner is exciting to you when that becomes impossible soon enough.

[–]peterlongcLove.Is.The.Drug3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

They should pass on supporting their children too, those rugrats are Really unappreciative of their father's tireless toiling.

Plus, they hog up all the free time you could be using to bang hot babes; or at least masturbate, smoke weed, or post brilliant social commentary on Reddit

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (58 children) | Copy Link

I think that's pretty accurate. It boggles my mind that more men aren't aware of this. Or perhaps they are aware and suffering from the "it won't happen to me" fallacy.

[–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (27 children) | Copy Link

They are delusional. Men who marry simply are delusional. At least nowadays

[–][deleted]  (26 children) | Copy Link

[deleted]

[–]Jackpot807Purple Pill Man0 points1 point  (25 children) | Copy Link

What if I want kids?

[–][deleted]  (24 children) | Copy Link

[deleted]

[–]Jackpot807Purple Pill Man6 points7 points  (23 children) | Copy Link

You’re incredibly cynical

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (22 children) | Copy Link

Haha my years of family law experience tell me that if something that happens 50% of the time has these kinds of consequences (more often if you count unmarried parents who separate), you should at least be conscious of the risk.

I may be cynical, but that doesn't mean I'm wrong.

Look, it's one thing to consciously understand the risks you face and accept that it's worth the risks. But I don't think that's what most people do. I think most people consciously ignore the risks and assume "it won't be me".

I think that's a dangerous and unfulfilling way to live, wilfull blindness.

But that's just me. I had a friend in college who would wait weeks before seeing what grade he got on his tests. I was the kind of person who needed to know right away.

Some people may proceed on the assumption they're better off not knowing/thinking about what bad could occur, and dealing with it when it happens.

Maybe my cynicism makes me miss out on the magic that happens when you take such risks.

But that's life. Everything has tradeoffs.

[–]wekacuckstupid buggy bot0 points1 point  (13 children) | Copy Link

my years of family law experience tell me that if something that happens 50% of the time has these kinds of consequences

I understand what you are saying but consider that you're now faced with a coin-toss. 50% of the time you get a shitty deal (divorce/co-parenting). 50% of the time you get a better than shitty deal (a loving marriage that survives).

Your great answer to this gamble is to just write off the chance for better and put the coin away to claim the shitty deal.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (11 children) | Copy Link

my years of family law experience tell me that if something that happens 50% of the time has these kinds of consequences

I understand what you are saying but consider that you're now faced with a coin-toss. 50% of the time you get a shitty deal (divorce/co-parenting).

50% of the time you get a better than shitty deal (a loving marriage that survives).

Not true. 50% of the time, you get a marriage that survives. There is no way to know how many of them are loving or even not outright miserable. I'm sure you can guess what my prediction is.

Your great answer to this gamble is to just write off the chance for better and put the coin away to claim the shitty deal.

I don't think it is a shitty deal. I think people not only underestimate the worst case scenario, but overestimate the middle case scenario (a marriage that "survives" but is miserable.)

Why not free oneself to be in someone's company for so long as is desired, and leave when it doesn't work anymore? Why plan around something where 50% definitely fails, and some portion of the other 50% entails misery?

[–]Nodoxxintoxin2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Not to mention there are lots ways to cheat the odds in your favor

[–]Jackpot807Purple Pill Man0 points1 point  (7 children) | Copy Link

I’m in a mgtow stage in my life, I know very well how petty and base women can be now that the power has been given to them.

But just because all women are like that doesn’t mean they will act on their animal impulse.

Monogamy is pretty much accepted as a non-natural behavior, while polyamory is natural. I think you and I can both agree that most of the natural tendencies of humans are suppressed for what we believe to be the ‘greater good’, something we know is more than what we would have if we were simply monkeys.

The problem, imo, is being aware of that. People always say they want to find someone to settle down with, have kids, etc, but the next day go out and fuck/get fucked by whoever takes the bait. It’s for this reason that the unconscious mind might as well be our own worst enemy, and it must be checked periodically.

I’m now of the belief that all of us ought to find someone who is aware of that, and is working to consciously suppress the animal inside of them, for the greater human purpose of a family and society.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

I’m in a mgtow stage in my life

Surprised you thought what I said is cynical!

I know very well how petty and base women can be now that the power has been given to them.

But just because all women are like that doesn’t mean they will act on their animal impulse.

But like you said, the power has been given to them. It's hard enough to avoid acting on animal impulse without being in power.

Monogamy is pretty much accepted as a non-natural behavior, while polyamory is natural. I think you and I can both agree that most of the natural tendencies of humans are suppressed for what we believe to be the ‘greater good’, something we know is more than what we would have if we were simply monkeys.

Now that we live comfortably and our survival isn't really at risk in the west, the greater good is pretty much an abstraction that is fairly easy to stray from without a top 10% geared-for-discipline personality.

I’m now of the belief that all of us ought to find someone who is aware of that, and is working to consciously suppress the animal inside of them, for the greater human purpose of a family and society.

There is no way to know if you have found someone who is going to stick to that kind of discipline in the long term. We don't need discipline for survival anymore in comofrtable western countries. In fact, I'd argue that someone who believes they are able to live that kind of life, and tries, is most at risk of straying from it out of fear of what they've missed out on--the harder you push a spring down, the farther it flies when you let it go.

[–]sublimemongrelBecky, Esq.3 points4 points  (29 children) | Copy Link

It doesn't happen to everyone. Not every guy would put up with stuff like that and not every woman would push for it.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (12 children) | Copy Link

Not every guy would put up with stuff like that and not every woman would push for it.

This is an unstable detente, if the research is true.

[–]sublimemongrelBecky, Esq.3 points4 points  (11 children) | Copy Link

What does that mean?

I don't know how anyone could "research" such an issue and come to any sound conclusion that would necessarily be accurate for all couples everywhere to begin with.

I can only assume you guys have not witnessed any marriages where this type of thing isn't the case. Surely you do not think such a thing is impossible?

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (10 children) | Copy Link

Just because it isn't expressed publicly (or expressed at all) doesn't show that that's not what the woman actually wants. People would be much more likely to be honest in an anonymous survey about such a thing. We can't rely on our experience of other couples, in other words, because this kind of thing is extremely private.

[–]sublimemongrelBecky, Esq.1 point2 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

I’m not relying on “public expressions.” I’m also not going to take one survey and say it conclusively means all demographic x isn’t y when y is something as inconsistent and differing as people’s preferred relationships.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (8 children) | Copy Link

I’m not relying on “public expressions.”

You mentioned people should be looking at marriages they've witnessed . What are you relying on there, then?

I’m also not going to take one survey and say it conclusively means all demographic x isn’t y when y is something as inconsistent and differing as people’s preferred relationships.

Sure. That's fair. It's one survey.

But in my view, a later survey wouldn't have to show that it is all. If a more comprehensive survey finds that even just the majority (rather than all) isn't X, then not using that as a guide is at a person's own peril. People lack the tools or sophistication to know up front whether the person they're dealing with is X or not X. It's one thing to say that the risk is worth it and accept it anyway. It's quite another to do what I think most people are inclined to do, which is ignore the risk altogether and ovrestimate their vetting skills.

[–]sublimemongrelBecky, Esq.2 points3 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

You mentioned people should be looking at marriages they've witnessed . What are you relying on there, then?

You can honestly say you’ve never observed a couple’s monogamous relationship like personally witnessed it enough, been close enough to the parties, etc, that you’ve never seen people in which monogamy works (for those parties) and they seem to prefer that (with each other)?

But in my view, a later survey wouldn't have to show that it is all.

You seemed to imply all. My original comment specifically said “not all marriages” (in effect) and you’re arguing that - if you don’t mean all do you disagree that this is not all marriages? And by that I mean my original comment was such that not all marriages involve some woman stomping all over some man who just kowtows to her.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy Link

You mentioned people should be looking at marriages they've witnessed . What are you relying on there, then?

You can honestly say you’ve never observed a couple’s monogamous relationship like personally witnessed it enough, been close enough to the parties, etc, that you’ve never seen people in which monogamy works (for those parties) and they seem to prefer that (with each other)?

You can never be close enough to truly know, especially in an era where we're all programmed to put on our best face for each other. Even people who are in the relationship itself may not know the other person harbors these feelings--how would we?

not all marriages involve some woman stomping all over some man who just kowtows to her.

As I see it, it's irrelevant whether a woman demands such an arrangement. What I'm more interested in is if it's true she will be unfulfilled without it. If the majority of women are eventually shown to be unfulfilled without such an arrangement, why would I want to try and force a woman into monogamy when it's likelier than not it'll eventually make her unhappy?

I'm surely not going to give her a Christmas pass.

[–]decoy88Black Male in London7 points8 points  (11 children) | Copy Link

It’s such a tired beat. Any man in a marriage = wimp with no backbone. Like nah fam, that’s just them

[–]NalkaNalkayou call it virtue, I call it cowardice2 points3 points  (10 children) | Copy Link

Marriage grinds men down, some are just made of stronger material and don't get worn down as far or as fast.

[–]decoy88Black Male in London8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Marriage and kids makes life hard for everyone involved. No woman says marriage is easy.

People go into marriage thinking it’s gonna be easier than it is or still choose to commit to their partners for life even if they’re unsure about them.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Seems to me like that kind of strength could be better used in pursuit of a different aim

[–]rainisthelifeFacepalm 😑3 points4 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

Statistics do not agree with you. Because they show that married men are happier than single men.

[–]NalkaNalkayou call it virtue, I call it cowardice2 points3 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

Think about that statement for a minute and I bet you can see the problem with it.

[–]PennnyLameMade a margarita once2 points3 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

If you look at the actual stats and not married with children reruns, there’s no problem with that statement.

[–]NalkaNalkayou call it virtue, I call it cowardice2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Oh look another one that posted without thinking about it for a minute. Go ahead, I know you can do it. Tell me what the problem with that statement is.

[–]PennnyLameMade a margarita once1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

no.

[–][deleted]  (3 children) | Copy Link

[deleted]

[–]sublimemongrelBecky, Esq.3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Both men and women have certain advantages and disadvantages.

[–]CatchPhraze2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This. Woman are more likely to file for divorce, but wives are more likely to do all household accounting. Men are more likely to leave without even bothering to finalize a divorce.

Men are more likely to physically cheat, goes up by age. Woman are more likely to withhold sex in the marriage to begin with.

Both are likely to relax their own beauty regimes and get fat.

Woman will sacrifice her carrier earning potential, as well as her free time being the primary caregiver and house manger, including taking care of ailing parents of either person and doing 50% more hours of housework and child rearing. Men are more likely to lose the wealth that was disproportionately earned through their labor to create equality in the division of assets.

The woman is more likely to get custody, because she has raised the child primarily. The man will have an easier time finding a new partner despite having a child because of this reduced custody then she will.

Nobody ever wins. But playing is still better then not I guess.

[–]PM_ME_CASHI don't see color2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Then he becomes supporting actor parent because the mother is the primary focus of the family.

Then that's a weak man.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

There's only so much even the strongest man can do to avoid this. It's just what happens.

[–]PM_ME_CASHI don't see color0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

It just happens, that's a very defeatist outlook.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I mean, it's biology functioning. Some species eat the male/feed to their babies. At least with humans, women only limit to emotionally neglecting. Usually.

[–]passepar2t0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

I thought you were a married woman. Is your marriage a rare exception or did it undergo the same thing you've described?

[–]DarkNights2926 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I guess more cuck husbands.

[–][deleted]  (6 children) | Copy Link

[deleted]

[–][deleted] 21 points22 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm surprised the author didn't follow up with 'Women don't really want to have your low value genes in their off spring, why not let her get railed by a rugby player and raise his child? Their is no greater gift of love'

Haha I swear that is the next step. "What kind of heartless bastard husband doesn't let his wife get knocked up by the man with the best possible genetics and then help raise the child??!!"

Actually, that doesn't even sound crazy relative to modern discourse.

It's really telling that she didn't phrase her "Christmas gift pass" as mutual, after all.

[–]happycheese86No Pill-2 points-1 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Yeah I'm such an evil woman, I make my husband take dick in the ass and hogtie me and have other guys rail me. Cucks are a subset of a fetish that you are trying to make some woman's grand scheme to undermine the male gender. Ya'll are crazy and vanilla.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Fetish mutually agreed on is one thing. But trying to negotiate a free pass from your significant other after years of monogamy is fuuuucked up.

[–][deleted]  (2 children) | Copy Link

[deleted]

[–]happycheese86No Pill-2 points-1 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Well that's not the sexual definition. You can be a cuck or a hotwife and not have any children. Do you think men are going to have a crisis of 'woe is me, My genes are so terrible that we have to edit them or the embryo' when genetic manipulation is more mainstream? Already happening in some places.

[–]the_calibre_cat12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Oh man, the left has been trying to kill monogamy for decades.

[–]passwordgoesherelate 30s purpleman5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I assured him that yes, it was all very unfeasible, and concluded that he will more probably gift me jewellery. (sp)

Was this written as a joke by one of you?

[–]xKalistoSAHM of Yurop1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Oh noes my SO buys me fancy jewellery, woe is me.

[–]cxj75% Redpill Core Ideas4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Martin believes that the MeToo movement has also been behind the shifting sands

“Shocking.” - no one

[–]Orange_Paisley4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I would rather my partner make an effort to indulge my fantasies/have play time with me than for him to farm me out to some other dude.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Wow that is fucked. How lost do you have to be to buy into that crap....

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Pretty damn lost I reckon

[–]TheBookOfSeilCuckleberry Finn5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah, no...

A cheat pass is a train ticket. To another state.

Bye, Felicia.

[–]Vinegar_Dick5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

At least they do admit they are whores...hey this a start.

[–]legaladvicequest10 points11 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Only if he gets a cheat pass, too. But why make your one life partner someone that wants to "cheat."

[–]Marino4KPurple with a splash of Red2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Here is the real point. Wouldn’t you know long before marriage if that person was even fooling around with the idea of polyamory. I’m not marrying someone if they want an open marriage, etc.

[–]legaladvicequest4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah, leave that open marriage person for someone else who also wants an open marriage. Don't you settle.

[–]poppy_bluAARP sent me a birthday card0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

I though that was understood

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

There's usually no way to know if your partner is that kind of partner until it comes up later on. It may be understood in the abstract, but in reality, we're blind till we see.

[–]PearsOfWrath3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

The reviews for this book really show how women are pushing for polyamory.

Fuckign disgusting.

[–]jazztaprazzta1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

The author of this degenerate book looks like a happily married woman, mom of boys. I wonder whether she cheats on her husband hmmm

[–]PearsOfWrath1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Don't have to wonder. She asked her husband for permission to cheat for research in her book. She said she didn't eventually cheat. But the fact that her husband is a cuck tells me enough.

[–]jazztaprazzta1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

so she didn't even cheat to her husband, but wrote a book encouraging other women to cheat.... She concluded, somewhere in her feminist brain, that cheating would actually be shitty for her in the long term.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

If this is true, wouldn't it suggest that monogamy is a losing proposition

Most women are primed for monogamy (at least serial monogamy) and there aren't enough Chads.
Also, not enough Chads for polygamy to work either.
Male gold diggers don't like sharing so that's also off the table.
A few women are OK having a cuck beta husband and an alpha(-er) BF but most aren't and will monkey branch.

Relationships are a losing proposition. Women no longer need men for their primary role: pillar of the home and provider, in part because the state, friends, relatives (and a metric ton of simps) have them covered.

For men, why throw your hat in a ring that's too crowded anyway?

[–][deleted]  (2 children) | Copy Link

[deleted]

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

While they still have men to deceive. Lots of men are checking out or at least opting to wait it out and see.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

You can't be deceived if you never give up anything you aren't willing to part with anyway.

[–]reddishrobin4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

This is the real reason for dead bedrooms. The wife gets bored. She would get her desire back with a new man, but that is bad for families and bad for society to bust up so many marriages.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Tldr: never marry

[–]blackedoutfastRed Pill Man19 points20 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Rosa Silverman

every fucking time

[–]25russianbear259 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Silverman

hmmmmm

[–]crackrocksteady7Jason tell me what you're chasing14 points15 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I love it when your insane moronic conspiracy theory worldview is proved right over and over and over again

[–]cxj75% Redpill Core Ideas9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]quasirealikecreature3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is absolutely bizzare. If my husband suggested this, I'd be very confused and then we'd have a conversation about what our wants and expectations are in the marriage/if they've changed as we both signed up for monogamy. I'd ask where he got this idea and then we'd laugh at how stupid this is and probably play a board game and continue with our lives.

If this was something I "needed" or even wanted I wouldn't have married him

[–]abaxeron✴️Indian Programmer3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Normal people don't cheat.

Good but flawed people cheat, apologize, and regret.

Fucked up people get called "Wednesday" by their parents and write books to hamster their mistakes away.

Revoke her PhD.

[–]TriadFamilyTimesEverything I know I learned from group sex2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is fucking stupid. The nonmonogamy community would tell you that if nonmonogamy is something you need (And MANY people are not suited for nonomonogamous relationships) you should honestly structure your life around it. It's not a thing you give out as a christmas present and it's certainly not something you hand out over...boredom?

The first sin of nonmonogamists is "Relationship broken: Add people" and it is so named because IT IS A TERRIBLE FUCKING IDEA.

[–]CainPrice5 points6 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

I've read in a few places now that within another generation or two, marriage is going to change from a monogamous institution to more of a family agreement.

Essentially, ultra-liberal feminists are going to argue that marriage is a patriarchal relic from the dark ages that men have used forever to enslave women and control their sexuality and that real, modern marriage should be about love and family, not about owning and controlling women. Therefore, real marriage should always be open, with women having sex with whoever they please, and if you think that you own her vagina or her sexuality just because you married her, you're a misogynist. The whole point of marriage should be loving her and having a family with her, not controlling her. If you really love her, you won't want to control her.

It's not that far-fetched. In another generation or two, the "hotwife" style marriage may be a lot more common.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

What kind of man who values himself would agree to that? Sounds like there just won't be many marriages.

[–]CainPrice7 points8 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Never underestimate how many losers are out there.

And never underestimate how many guys who never managed to break into the casual sex culture and struggled to find the few relationships they've had would choose some kind of female companionship over some lame porn and video game MGTOW lifestyle.

Society is built on the back of workhorse men, grateful for whatever they can get. This won't break the system any more than the birth control pill and the advent of the casual sex culture did.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Never underestimate how many losers are out there.

And never underestimate how many guys who never managed to break into the casual sex culture and struggled to find the few relationships they've had would choose some kind of female companionship over some lame porn and video game MGTOW lifestyle.

Society is built on the back of workhorse men, grateful for whatever they can get. This won't break the system any more than the birth control pill and the advent of the casual sex culture did.

Instead of marriage, or MGTOW, why not just engage in spread out casual relationships as and when they arise? I think men tend to overestimate how much better marriage would be than that.

[–]CainPrice4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

About half of the men out there don't know how to enter or navigate the casual sex culture. They're playing the wrong game under the wrong rules. But casual sex is pretty public now. Not nearly as hush-hush, judged, or discreet. So that may change in the future, and we might see more guys hooking up. One can hope.

[–]Physiologist210 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I mean, I am all for people doing whatever they want to do but having an even higher frequency of casual sex than already exists is not very good for society as has already been noted by research. Not exactly something one would hope for.

[–]rainisthelifeFacepalm 😑0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

The “hotwife” and cucking is actually more a male fantasy than an idea from boogey man ultra liberal feminists.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy Link

[deleted]

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

She said the quiet part out loud

[–]crackrocksteady7Jason tell me what you're chasing8 points9 points  (30 children) | Copy Link

Archive this shit. Your clicks are why some moron wrote this for i.stuff.co.nz

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (29 children) | Copy Link

I don't know if this makes a difference but it is a writeup of an article in the Telegraph, considered a "newspaper of record" in the UK

[–]hammerhauntsbread pill6 points7 points  (28 children) | Copy Link

It's clickbait garbage

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (27 children) | Copy Link

[–]hammerhauntsbread pill5 points6 points  (26 children) | Copy Link

The bbc is also clickbait garbage

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (25 children) | Copy Link

What's not garbage

[–]crackrocksteady7Jason tell me what you're chasing1 point2 points  (17 children) | Copy Link

Not the MSM that's for sure

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (16 children) | Copy Link

So everything that is mainstream is garbage. Let's just not read anything read by more than 1000 people. Since what most people read, the fact of their reading it, has no significance on society or society's opinions or direction.

[–]peterlongcLove.Is.The.Drug1 point2 points  (15 children) | Copy Link

There's a pretty famous book out there that's kinda against all these fancy new ideas. The most mainstream book ever let's say; the second most mainstream book too.

You don't have to believe in it to recognize that there's opposing mainstream visions out there.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I guess what I'm saying is that discussing non-Biblical mainstream opinions need not mean endorsing them, but rather doing so helps with understanding what many people out there are digesting and trying to make sense of how that is shaping society.

[–][deleted]  (12 children) | Copy Link

[deleted]

[–]hammerhauntsbread pill0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy Link

the economist

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Ohh fancy. OK. Here's the Economist (1843 Magazine)

Seth and his girlfriend of many years were already engaged when he discovered she had cheated on him. It was only once, with a co-worker, but the betrayal stung. “I had jealousy, insecurity, anger, fear,” he recalls. “It was really hard to talk about it.” He wondered whether his fiancée’s infidelity meant there was something fundamentally wrong with their otherwise loving relationship. He worried it was a sign that their marriage would be doomed. He also still felt guilty about an indiscretion of his own years earlier, when he’d had a one-night stand with an acquaintance. “I knew that what I had done meant nothing,” said Seth, a New York-based entrepreneur in his early 30s. “It felt like a bit of an adventure, and I went for it.” But anxiety about these dalliances gnawed at his conscience. How could he and his fiancée promise to be monogamous for a lifetime if they were already struggling to stay loyal to each other? Did their momentary lapses of judgment spell bigger problems for their union? For help answering these questions, Seth and his partner went to Esther Perel, a Belgian-born psychotherapist who is renowned for her work with couples.

Esther's advice?

“Esther helped us understand that perfection is not possible in relationships,” he explains to me. With Perel’s help, Seth and his fiancée have come to embrace a relationship they are calling “monogamish” – that is, they will aspire to be faithful to each other, but also tolerate the occasional fling. “It just never occurred to us that this is something we could strive for,” he says. “But why should everything we built be destroyed by a minor infidelity?”

[–][deleted]  (4 children) | Copy Link

[removed]

[–][deleted]  (2 children) | Copy Link

[removed]

[–]LittleknownfactsVaguely Uncivil Comment[M] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Be civil.

[–]Lillizsomd2 points3 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

I think this fits women the same as men. On an individual basis. Some men and some women are not meant to be monogamous, some are. It's up to each individual to know if they would thrive in a marriage or not. I'm a very monogamous person, and when I need more spice in my relationship, we do something new together; it's not about wanting to fuck someone different.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

I think this fits women the same as men.

But what this research is saying is that monogamy is, on the whole, harder for women than for men.

On an individual basis.

Everything varies on an individual basis. But if what the research found is true, it implies that as a man entering into a monogamous relationship, it is more likely than not that your partner will feel more restrained by it.

Some men and some women are not meant to be monogamous, some are.

And that's the problem: there's no way to really know which one your partner is until something like this comes up, because it's possible that they don't even know yet. You don't feel constrained until you feel constrained.

It's up to each individual to know if they would thrive in a marriage or not.

But that's the thing...there's no way to know, and the implication of this research ("monogamy is a tighter fit for women") is that as time goes on the man in a relationship is likely to be on the other side of a relationship where the woman feels sexually constrained.

There is just no way to know if that will happen in an individual situation in advance. Whether the girl in time is more akin to someone like you who is

a very monogamous person, and when I need more spice in my relationship, we do something new together; it's not about wanting to fuck someone different.

or different

I totally agree that there is individual variation.

[–]Physiologist211 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Why is monogamy harder for women than for men? I would've assumed the opposite.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

That's what makes this research so fascinating. It contradicts widely held beliefs about whose actually suffering in having to be monogamous.

[–]Physiologist211 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Yes but why?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Dual mating strategy.

[–]Lillizsomd0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

I'm a woman, first of all, and I'm saying I don't believe that being monogamous is any harder for a woman than a man. But I think people inherently can know if they can be happy with one person for life. That idea doesn't stress me out the way it does other people.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

But I think people inherently can know if they can be happy with one person for life. That idea doesn't stress me out the way it does other people.

So you at least agree that some people may not inherently know, and that it's reasonable for the idea to be stressful. I mean at the end of the day, it's all conjecture, right?

[–]Lillizsomd0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Of course it's all conjecture and anecdotal, but one of my pet peeves is people that know they'll never stay faithful to one person getting into committed, monogamous relationships. In 2018, there's no need for that.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is true. But someone trying to negotiate sleeping around in the midst of a monogamous relationship because their needs have evolved is, I think, just as hurtful, if not more, even though the intent is much less malicious than someone who enters into a relationship already knowing they aren't interested in monogamy.

[–]dante42lk2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Dead bedrooms largely are caused by women, who do not put any significant effort into working things out due to their entitlement and security social-wise (alimony, 50-50, etc). Women get tired faster because they tend not to work on problems in the relationship or affection, not even mentioning if there's any on her side.

[–]Autistic_ReeeeeeeeeeRed Pill Man5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

This is classic. Women prefer high value men. When a women no longer considers her man high value she will be inclined to stray away from him and move onto another. Women like to be safe so they will string man along through this process to make sure when they finally make the jump they are safe but also have someone to fall back on.

This is an absolute truth. The only thing that varies is what a particular women finds valuable.

With men it is different. We just want many women. Our love does not really change, but we do prefer more fertile, youthful and beautiful women. However loyalty is more important to us than anything and women who show loyalty are the ones men choose to stay with.

There are exceptions to every rule but you are unlikely to be one of them.

This article is garbage by the way. Makes me sick to think these degenerates would condone something so sinister.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy Link

[deleted]

[–]Autistic_ReeeeeeeeeeRed Pill Man1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Even though it is true you are not supposed to say it friend.

They will just call you an Incel for bringing it up.

You have to dance around the topic a little bit or face being ostracised and cast out.

Men especially don't like to hear this truth. Makes them think their current relationship can end at any moment when another high value male with better utility comes along.

[–]says_harsh_thingsRed Pill - Chad4 points5 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

If she wants a hall pass, its because you suck.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

You can be the most exciting person in the world, but you can't simultaneously be another person.

[–]cxj75% Redpill Core Ideas9 points10 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

This is the cold hard truth .

shes never yours, it’s just your turn

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It sounds cold and hard, but I think men and women would both be better off just accepting it for what it is and planning their lives that way instead of willfully being blind to it.

[–]Jackpot807Purple Pill Man1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

No.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

What if it was this christmas give your husband a cheat pass?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

No major media outlet would ever publish an article like that in current year

[–]dylang92Clear Pill1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lol nah.

[–]heycool-1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is some dumb advice. Want to fuck around? Don’t be in a relationship.

No wonder STDs are on the rise.

[–]Willow-girlSuffering from bovarian oppression1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Um, no thank you. No time or inclination for that shit.

[–]LeJacquelopeHaving a son is child abuse1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]poppy_bluAARP sent me a birthday card2 points3 points  (23 children) | Copy Link

This question should be restricted to people who’ve been married for a while. I’m so over people who’ve never even been on a date lecturing the rest of us on what marriage is and should be like. Once you’ve done the long haul of a decade or more of monogamy and slogging through the day to day shit of marriage, come back and tell me how this idea is “evil/proves hypergamy/proves women are worthless shit/blah blah blah.”

I mean, I ain’t saying I myself would do it. But I understand.

[–]wekacuckstupid buggy bot7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Do you agree with this idea that monogamy is harder for women?

What do you think is meant by when the article says monogamy is harder for women than for men? I was pondering that and I'm just wondering if all it's saying that women find it easier to get strange and therefore have more options because they are sacrificing more potential sexual partners. Which... duh... but what's up with making it sound like some huge injustice?

[–]poppy_bluAARP sent me a birthday card8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Men have a stronger desire than women but women have more options than men. I’ll buy that.

[–]xKalistoSAHM of Yurop4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Idk, I've been committed for 11 years (thought I admit just 1 married) with whooping n count of 1 and it seems like ridiculous idea anyway.

Open relationship is one thing but a cheating pass sounds eeeeh...somehow mucky.

[–]poppy_bluAARP sent me a birthday card1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I hear you. It’s really not for everyone. I see this kind of thing working in a relationship where you’ve already talked about being open, or tried threesomes, or just generally been open about the tpic. Springing this on your wife out of the blue would be a very unwise move.

I think there are too many literalists on PPD

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

I mean I ain’t saying I myself would do it. But I understand.

I don't think it being evil or whatever is true or relevant. What I think is more interesting is the reasonable conclusion that a man should not enter into monogamy at all if the research is true--why sign up for that when what is waiting down the road is at best a partner who wants unilateral permission to cheat but doesn't ask for it, at worst a partner who demands unilateral permission to cheat or will end the relationship?

In that context, what possible benefit does monogamy have to a man?

[–]poppy_bluAARP sent me a birthday card4 points5 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Lol where do I start with this one.

First off, nothing in OP suggests that the pass is unilateral and the whole point of a pass is that your spouse willingly gives it to you.

Second, if you’re getting married expecting your SO to never be attracted to or fantasize about fucking someone else, don’t get married. Hey men who watch muitlpe hours of porn a day who want to sit in judgement when their wives wonder what it’s like to be with another man... fuck you.

Third — and this is my point about never marrieds not knowing what the fuck their talking about - monogamy is hard. But it’s not the urge for strange at issue here. At the end of the day everyone in a monogamous relationship is responsible for the choices they make.

Fourth, married people open up their relationships all the time. Their reasons for doing so are up to them, not to the Reddit court of public opinion. It’s not for everyone, and I certainly don’t suggest everyone do it. But for some, it’s what they need to keep their marriage going. Who are we to judge?

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

First off, nothing in OP suggests that the pass is unilateral and the whole point of a pass is that your spouse willingly gives it to you.

What I see as the larger point is that your spouse may be inclined to want one in the first place, even before the stage of it being willingly given.

Second, if you’re getting married expecting your SO to never be attracted to or fantasize about fucking someone else, don’t get married. Hey men who watch muitlpe hours of porn a day who want to sit in judgement when their wives wonder what it’s like to be with another man... fuck you.

Fantasize is different from the fantasy being inadequate, which is what the research suggests, at least to me.

Third — and this is my point about never marrieds not knowing what the fuck their talking about - monogamy is hard. But it’s not the urge for strange at issue here. At the end of the day everyone in a monogamous relationship is responsible for the choices they make.

Sure. What I'm proposing is that entering into monogamy in the first place is itself is a bad choice. What's really the benefit?

Fourth, married people open up their relationships all the time. Their reasons for doing so are up to them, not to the Reddit court of public opinion. It’s not for everyone, and I certainly don’t suggest everyone do it. But for some, it’s what they need to keep their marriage going. Who are we to judge?

I'm not talking about judging them. I'm talking about people who haven't gone down that road yet. For those people who can still save themselves from pain that isn't worth the trouble, it matters a great deal whether the arrangements are made enthusiastically/happily or out of an urge to save the relationship at all costs, all judgment aside.

[–]poppy_bluAARP sent me a birthday card0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

What I see as the larger point is that your spouse may be inclined to want one in the first place

What if the genders were reversed?

Again the view can look at lot different when you’re on the field vs the bench.

Fantasize is different from the fantasy being inadequate

I don’t know what this means.

What I'm proposing is that entering into monogamy in the first place is itself is a bad choice

It depends. For some people it works. For others it doesn’t. If you go in feeling from the get go that it’s a gut wrenching sacrifice then yeah it’s not for you.

If you want guarantees in life avoid both relationships and parenting.

matters a great deal whether the arrangements are made enthusiastically/happily or out of an urge to save the relationship at all costs

Fair enough.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

What I see as the larger point is that your spouse may be inclined to want one in the first place

What if the genders were reversed?

My point remains the same regardless of which gender is which in the scenario.

Fantasize is different from the fantasy being inadequate

I don’t know what this means.

The study is talking about actually wanting another partner because of lack of fulfillment, not merely fantasizing about having another partner.

It depends. For some people it works. For others it doesn’t. If you go in feeling from the get go that it’s a gut wrenching sacrifice then yeah it’s not for you.

But what makes it worth it...like, to you?

If you want guarantees in life avoid both relationships and parenting.

Yes, that's my point. What makes a relationship worth the trouble if it's not a guarantee?

You don't have to be in a relationship to be parents. Just skip the eventual custody dispute and agree to a timeshare arrangement upfront like the court would make you do anyway. Avoid disappointing the kids from their assumption that mommy and daddy would be together forever (surely providing kids with a guarantee of how that will all look is worthwhile).

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Sixteen years here. Put me in the "I get why people would/do open up marriages but it's not for me." camp. Though as I get older and the idea of only living once really starts sinking in, I'd be okay with him doing something reeeeaally sick and depraved that I have no interest in with someone else. Or if I got cancer or something banging someone else. But I have no interest in getting strange myself. We've talked about the idea of passes, he's got a much harsher view of them than me both in issuing or using them.

[–]hammerhauntsbread pill2 points3 points  (11 children) | Copy Link

I mean, I ain’t saying I myself would do it. But I understand.

that just gives a good idea of which women are evil/proves hypergamy/proves women are worthless shit/blah blah blah

[–]poppy_bluAARP sent me a birthday card2 points3 points  (10 children) | Copy Link

Yeah OK. Got an actual point to make?

[–]hammerhauntsbread pill4 points5 points  (9 children) | Copy Link

It isn't universal, just limited to undesirable women

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Not asking for it isn't the same as not wanting it. If it's true that most women deep down feel this way, and are just suppressing it, that suppression will play out in other negative behavior even among many nonundesirable women (e.g. dead bedroom, emotional distance, whatever)

[–]poppy_bluAARP sent me a birthday card0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

He’s just trying to take a shot at me by suggesting I’m ugly.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy Link

[removed]

[–]poppy_bluAARP sent me a birthday card0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

K. Whatever you say.

[–]rainisthelifeFacepalm 😑0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

Lol you seem incredibly triggered.

[–]hammerhauntsbread pill0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

nah

[–]rainisthelifeFacepalm 😑0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Incredibly, incredibly triggered.

[–]hammerhauntsbread pill0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

nah

[–]poppy_bluAARP sent me a birthday card-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Ok, ad hominems. You’re on a roll.

[–]hammerhauntsbread pill1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

clickbait

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[–]Million-SunsMarriage is obsolete7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Marriage: just don't.

[–]LifterofThingsDelicate Feminine Flower5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I'd be upset if he gave me a "cheat pass". I'd be like "why don't you love me anymore?"

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Adorbs

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Here's a good article.

"Gave my wife a knuckle sandwich and she surprisingly stopped shit testing me"

[–]poppy_bluAARP sent me a birthday card1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

knuckle sandwich

Old head

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This Christmas, give your husband his annual sex appointment

[–]allweknowisD-1 points0 points  (10 children) | Copy Link

I’m sure these reactions would show the exact same distaste if the article was flipped with genders..

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

The article is saying that women as a whole find monogamy a "tighter fit". Maybe there's a non-cynical explanation for why what you're implying (about the nature of comments if it were a reverse hall pass suggestion) is true, if it is. These kinds of truths (assuming it is true) often reach people's consciousnesses before they reach a researcher's desk.

[–]allweknowisD1 point2 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

Just what?

All I’m saying is that when guys get bored sexually and want to have new people to sleep with it’s nature and okay and monogamy isn’t okay.

But as soon as it’s suggested that women may like these things too? What a cuck society! Not on my watch! Only weak men would allow this!

Honestly, at least try to hide the hypocrisy

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

All I’m saying is that when guys get bored sexually and want to have new people to sleep with it’s nature and okay and monogamy isn’t okay.

Who is actually saying that in a context of a marriage that is a valid justification for men? Maybe they used to say that in past times, but those people are dead.

But as soon as it’s suggested that women may like these things too? What a cuck society! Not on my watch! Only weak men would allow this! Honestly, at least try to hide the hypocrisy

I think the sentiment applies equally (or if anything, is more forgiving of women's sexual boredom in marriage). Can you show me a modern perspective that has stated that it's ok for only a man to cheat in marriage because biology?

Again, I realize this used to be a common and accepted justification, but those people are dead.

[–]allweknowisD0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy Link

I’m not discussing research, I’m discussing the comments on this thread. Where it’s more than common for men to be discussing spinning plates and biology and nature.

I don’t care about ridiculous studies

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

I’m not discussing research, I’m discussing the comments on this thread. Where it’s more than common for men to be discussing spinning plates and biology and nature.

Tell me who is saying spin plates while married. They may say spin plates instead of getting married, but surely you see how that is different

ridiculous studies

Are all studies ridiculous, or just this one? Surely there would be a way to study this topic nonridculously.

[–]allweknowisD0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

Please don’t act coy on the discussions that happen on this sub. Plenty advocate spinning plates whilst married or open relationships where only the man can sleep around. I don’t exactly have comments at hand to link.

Not all but a large amount. Clearly not considering when it is studied youre calling it bs and everyone screams feminist propaganda to create a cuckhold society lol

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Well, you're right. Any man who simultaneously says married men should spin plates and married women should not is being profoundly hypocritical.

But I've gotta add, red pill is pretty pessimistic on the idea of any man entering marriages or LTRs, and that's where the concept of spinning plates comes from in the first place. So I would be surprised to know that the above is a common perspective. I could be wrong.

[–]allweknowisD0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

TRP has subsets. Plenty of RP men are part of MRP or post there with “advice”.

[–]rainisthelifeFacepalm 😑-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lol we both know they won’t.

[–]cryopotat0uuncertain0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

"women tire of their sexual partners faster than men"

is this true? is there any evidence suggesting it?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

That was the research they were discussing (that drew that conclusion), but to be fair it does seem preliminary

[–]HostileErectile0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Lol, hopefully no one takes that article seriously. jesus christ.

Hah, and ofcourse its written by a woman.

[–]petrichordiummidsommar pill0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy Link

So this article is cringe. Zero doubt. That said:

It’s a high risk strategy, to be sure, but in the right hands it really can work quite nicely! I’ve definitely had relationships where opening things up improved our connection considerably. It depends what kind of person your partner is and how you handle it.

First off, many women do not want this and are quite monogamous. Other women will absolutely lose respect and attraction to their primary partner, even if she enjoys getting banged by some strange. Some women like this are serial monogamists at heart, others are just hypocritical twits.

For other women, your connection can get deeper, it makes her more sexually generous/enthusiastic, and just makes life a bit more exciting.

This is, importantly, the same with men. Yes, men are more LIKELY to enjoy a stable harem style non monogamy than women, but i know a few girls who have given their guy a pass and then got Tarzaned out of her relationship in favor of the side girl.

Nobody is pretending this isn’t risky. Personally i like the double black diamonds of love, but I’ll see you kids on the bunny slopes on my way down.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

So this article is cringe. Zero doubt. That said:

It’s a high risk strategy, to be sure, but in the right hands it really can work quite nicely! I’ve definitely had relationships where opening things up improved our connection considerably. It depends what kind of person your partner is and how you handle it.

What I'm most worried about is people who enter into monogamy thinking it is stable and closed, and wanting it only that way, and then are blindsided by their partner's request to open things up. If this research holds, then a majority of the time that is the risk a man thinking he's entering into stable monogamy is opening himself up to.

[–]petrichordiummidsommar pill2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

So like, my condescending rhetoric aside, this is why i choose non monogamy personally. It’s the appropriate kind of risk for myself and the people I’m attracted to.

Monogamous risk is illiquidity risk. No thanks, I’m a control freak AND i need some alpha in my portfolio. (I hate financial metaphors btw, just happens).

Some element of non monogamy is a way of managing risk while achieving the kind of “return” i am seeking. If other people are finding that monogamy is neither accretive nor risk-free enough for them, maybe they need to structure their relationships differently?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Right, it sounds like you make these arrangements up front, at the beginning. What I think is pretty emotionally damaging to another person is trying to negotiate this kind of arrangement later on down the line after already being monogamous.

[–][deleted]  (1 child) | Copy Link

[deleted]

[–]petrichordiummidsommar pill1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Deception is annoying, time consuming, and hurtful. I have good low stakes casual relationships with people who aren’t super well matched for LtRs but i only commit to women who match my philosophy on sex.

[–]HectoSexual0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Monogamy is outdated anyway. Just skip that whole deal.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

👍

[–]PearsOfWrath0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy Link

Fuck the cucks for letting cunts like this 'Wednesday Martin' to run her mouth and say so much stupid woman shit.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

It gives a lot of insight into the real agenda when the feminists say the quiet part out loud

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Marriages, by this reasoning, could be saved. And something even bigger could occur: a societal shift in power relations between the sexes.

I want to question her about this statement.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

"marriage = wife can do as she pleases"

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah I mean I want to see her wriggle around trying to justify it.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

but women do not need this pass. They already cuckold their husbands and husbands take it with a smile. Welcome to 21st century's soy boy generation.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

The final stage...making the cucking blatant and public

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

exactly.

[–]jazztaprazzta0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

It's all fun and games, folks! Just find a bull for your wife, or even better let her find one herself. If you want, tou can stay in the background and masturbate with a sock while the bull is fucking her. It's beautiful!!!

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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