TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

37

So much of the issues that cause subs like this to be born, to me seem to be caused by the fact that so many men, and so many women, seem completely incapable of empathy. So many men can't seem to understand why that girl in the club doesn't want to dance with just any dude. So many girls can't seem to understand why being routinely ignored by the opposite sex might make incels angry. Girls listen to men "locker-room talk" about women, and get angry and cry about objectification, and then can't seem to understand why men get mad when they hear women talk about men and complain about how "all men are pigs/trash". Guys call girls sluts and hoes, and then wonder why girls don't want to fuck them on the first date.

So much of this seems to actually be counter productive. Why slut-shame, when you want girls to fuck you on the first date/after picking the up in a club? Why complain about fuck-boys and lament the lack of nice guys... and then go on to fuck fuck-boys? Why do so many guys not seem to understand why girls (stereotypically) are afraid of being called sluts (and how that informs their behavior), and why do so many girls not seem to understand why guys (stereotypically) are afraid of becoming incels/going on dry-spells (and how that informs their behavior)?

Or, to give a more relevant example to what inspired this post, feminist rage about how women are objectified in the media, and the media is overrun by 'sexy' images of women... and then don't seem to understand how, in a world where boys are already doing worse than girls at school, abolishing dress codes for girls and letting them wear whatever they want to school (including outrageously skimpy clothing) might just maybe distract boys and make them do even worse. Expecting men to be in control and poised at all times, no matter what women are wearing? I can get behind that. Expecting the same from boys? From kids? The only people who could demand that have clearly never been a boy going through puberty, or have never even tried to imagine what being a preteen boy is like, and that's all I have to say about that. Never mind that, half of the time, the reason boys don't get dress-coded as much is because boys' fashion just doesn't have as much diversity as girls' clothing; this must be discrimination. If you want to make a stand for the desexualisation of the female body, doing so in the one area where you're going to run into tons of parents concerned about their kids education, probably isn't the smartest idea. (And yes I do concede that some dress codes actually are just bullshit).

Or, to give another relevant example to what inspired this post, guys at my college recently raged about how some girls threw a topless 'body positivity' party... and saying boys weren't allowed to attend. As if they couldn't understand why a bunch of girls could possible feel uncomfortable being half-naked around a bunch of horny guys. Anybody who can't understand that, has clearly never been a woman, or even tried to imagine what being a women is like. Never mind all the statistics about sexual assault, or campus predators, or just plain violence; clearly this must just be "a lack of body positivity for men", this must be discrimination, there must be no possible reason for women to be cautious/uncomfortable.

This isn't even about facts, or objective reality; this about people seemingly being unable to realise that emotions aren't always based on objective reality. It doesn't matter what the figures on sexual assault actually are; if a girl has been raised listening to the 'BE CAREFUL' narrative, then that is what is going to inform her emotions, and make her dis-invite men to her topless party, and no amount of anti-feminist screeching is going to change that. It doesn't matter if 'objectifying women' is evil, or if the media is 'a poisonous puppet of the patriarchy'; if a preteen/teen boy has grown up watching main stream, objectifying movies, then his classmates coming to school in booty shorts is going to distract him, and it is going to impact his learning, and no amount of feminist screeching is going to change that.

That's actually why I liked Red Pill in the beginning. It used to be all about just accepting that women are, in general, going to act a certain way, because that's what works best for them, just like how men are going to act in a certain way because that's what works best for them, and that raging against that was stupid and pointless. The same could be said for "pop-culture feminism". Now it just seems like both movements are just all about shaming/complaining about the opposite gender, and that's just sad.

End rant.

TL:DR = Too much of the outrage and issues that cause things like this sub, is just men and women refusing to even try and understand what being the other gender is like.


[–]Young_Oryx 1 points [recovered]  (10 children) | Copy Link

Empathy is alive and well... but usually not in the worst corners of the internet. People feel free to be on their worst behavior when they're anonymous, so they don't usually treat each other with kindness or courtesy.

I think people would feel a lot better and have a more nuanced, tolerant view of others if they spent less time on the internet.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

The more time I spend in meatspace the less I like most people

[–]Young_OryxPills are so last year2 points3 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Interesting. Did you always have such negative interactions with people, or is it a recent thing?

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Basically once I started seeing the transactional nature of every interpersonal interaction it ruined everything. You cant blame that on TRP either that was a long time coming and then when I found the sub "hey other people are noticing the same shit, especially with women". I'm disgusted when people see nothing I have that they want and reject/ignore me and I'm disgusted when people kiss my ass because they want something from me. I only let in the few people that I perceive as being different but they notice that I'm nice to them and couldn't care less about anyone else.

We were talking today about unrealistic dream jobs that would allow us to travel a lot. Being a Bush plane charter pilot came up and it's a really nice thought because I could just go somewhere really remote and get away from pretty much everyone

[–]Young_OryxPills are so last year0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

Thanks for the detailed reply! It's interesting how different people are. Spending time in a remote place away from everyone pretty much sounds like hell to me.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Oh I fucking love isolating myself until my companionship instincts kick in. But unlike most that shit takes longer before it happens. Interacting with people is tiring, but sometimes I need it. I feel lonely either way, but in isolation I at least don't feel bothered by anything. Isolation is like alcohol to me, it feels nice but too much and I get negative consequences.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I had a nice cabin in the country for years. I regret moving into town all the time

[–]Whodunnit88Survivied Purge Week 20180 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

Like some hippy bible group?

"Feel the energy. Be one with Jesus as your charkras realign."

[–]Young_OryxPills are so last year1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Not necessarily. A group pertaining to one's interests would probably do the trick too. I have heard good things about Meetup.com for finding those.

[–]Whodunnit88Survivied Purge Week 20180 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

That's all just yoga classes for middle aged women

[–]jackandjill22Red Pill misanthropic, contrarian0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yea, it's reserved like giving fucks. It's not given freely.

[–]ThisIsJustATr1buteHas what plants crave16 points17 points  (20 children) | Copy Link

Yeah. You’re right. And now, people are actually preemptively lacking in empathy; since they expect to receive no empathy themselves.

I empathize with incels, but when I try to help them not be miserable they hurl abuse at me. I empathize with trp guys in that they’re disillusioned, and I pity them for thinking cheap sex is the path to fulfillment; but they wouldn’t appreciate my concern.

So yeah I get tired and sometimes it’s easier to troll.

IMO the problem is a philosophical one. Too much nihilism and pure materialism. Stoicism isn’t great either nor is worship of the Superman.

[–]i_have_a_semicolonPurple Pill Woman2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Empathy is just stretching yourself and validating your approach on feedback. About people who you don't understand at all, until you figure out how you both relate.

[–]SkrattGoddess5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Nah, empathy is understanding what someone's going through. That's what empathy is.

[–]i_have_a_semicolonPurple Pill Woman2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

IMO, it's more than that because we cannot possibly understand first hand what everyone goes through, but we can try to be empathetic anyway

Dictionary def:

the ability to understand and share the feelings of another.

I believe that empathy can also arises just by thinking. You can project yourself out and put yourself in their shoes (and, in their head...) And see if you can feel what you think they are going through. Then you can optionally confirm it, but I recommend confirming since empathy is imperfect as a shared understanding. Its mostly projection, which can translate emotions better than words, but I think getting people to think and talk is good too. The hard thing is doing it really well.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah it becomes hard to emphasize when people keep not giving you empathy and are so far gone they just lash out on you when you try.

That said, you can definitely empathize with me when I'm not in my trolly moods. It feels nice to have your concerns or frustrations be acknowledged and to feel listened to. Don't pity me though, that shit doesn't get me anywhere.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I empathize with incels, but when I try to help them not be miserable they hurl abuse at me. I empathize with trp guys in that they’re disillusioned, and I pity them for thinking cheap sex is the path to fulfillment; but they wouldn’t appreciate my concern.

This isn't empathy it's a superiority complex. They are right to not appreciate your fake concern.

[–]LeJacquelopeHaving a son is child abuse3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Oh for God's sake...

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (12 children) | Copy Link

Treat us with empathy in real life not the internet.

[–]ThisIsJustATr1buteHas what plants crave6 points7 points  (11 children) | Copy Link

I do. I’m kind to humans irl. But if you define empathy as I must generously give sex to any guy who asks, that’s gonna be a no.

[–][deleted] -3 points-2 points  (10 children) | Copy Link

Then your the same. The problem is a lack or sex and romantic relario ships.

[–]RockinSocksII25F poiple INTP - Not single, Eastuss needs to know this3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

If it was just a lack of sex, you all could hire prostitutes. Your problems run much deeper than that

[–]praisethesun799Not actually a fag 😉5 points6 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

Then you don't deserve any empathy at all you disgusting freak

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy Link

I already don't get it u fuck

[–]praisethesun799Not actually a fag 😉0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

I know , empathy is for human beings

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

Yeah males r not considered human unless they are Chad

[–]praisethesun799Not actually a fag 😉0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

I must be chad then 😂

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yep

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I know right. Fuck the incels, but only figuratively.

[–]planejaneRemove head from sphincter, THEN type.1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

You're advocating for a version of communism, you get that, right?

Equality of outcome.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah pretty much.

[–]YetAnotherCommenterPurple Pill Man, Sexual Economics Theory6 points7 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

"Empathy" is overrated, but most importantly the very ideal of "empathy" has been completely devalued and destroyed in contemporary gender discourse.

To be blunt, most of the demands for "more empathy" that have been made in recent years have worked out to unilateral demands for other people to supply empathy/sympathy/kindness/etc to other people or to another group. At the same time, most of the people who have been demanding empathy have been actively promoting a subculture that deliberately curtails empathy towards those seen as members of 'normative' groups.

As such, when we hear "society needs more empathy," what a lot of people hear is a demand from the speaker that "other people must empathize more with meeeeeee and my suffering and expect nothing in return for doing so!!!"

And this kind of climate only guarantees the wide-scale erosion of genuine empathy.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Isn't OP just saying he wants more empathy so people understand where the other is coming from instead of arguing in circles all day? I don't think people just mean empathy for themselves. I also think if nobody has any empathy we're liklier to get people who go insane and do something bad.

[–]YetAnotherCommenterPurple Pill Man, Sexual Economics Theory2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Isn't OP just saying he wants more empathy so people understand where the other is coming from instead of arguing in circles all day?

That's probably true, and I think OP is right. I'm just saying that one of the barriers preventing the OP from attaining the outcome they desire is that most people who advocate for "more empathy" are REALLY just advocating for other people being more empathetic towards them, for nothing in return.

I don't think people just mean empathy for themselves.

I'm sure there are people who genuinely want more mutual empathy. The problem is that, at least IMO, these are the minority.

I also think if nobody has any empathy we're liklier to get people who go insane and do something bad.

I agree entirely. Although I think a more rationality-based, cognitive empathy or "rational compassion" is necessary.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Ah, this makes sense. I see nothing wrong with this view.

Wait fuck what's up with all this real talk I've been having in purge week lately I gotta use my shitpost opportunities more.

[–]allanmes1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Very well put

[–]Erect4PurgeWeek 1 points [recovered]  (2 children) | Copy Link

Exactly, but what is the solution? How do you convince people that empathy is something worth learning/having?

[–]AlanHalworthPurple Pill / BP++1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Maybe there could be empathy "field reports," like:

  • I listened to this person and learned about what he is going through, and it seemed to make him smile / like me / do something I wanted him to do.
  • I read some blogs / articles from a political perspective that is different from my own, and I learned something / struck up a good conversation with a family member / colleague who thinks differently than I do.
  • I thought about other peoples' motivations and I figured out how to influence them / how to communicate with them / how to get along with them.

[–]SkrattGoddess0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

They already know. Just not on here.

[–]xthecharacterdoes this dress make me look pretty?!3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

God damn this post is so PURPLE

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[–]woyspawn1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Didn't know that u/SRU_91 had a second account.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah, if other guys slut-shame it makes it more difficult for outsiders who don't do that kind of thing to get laid.

If other girls arbitrarily creep-shame or virgin-shame, it makes it more difficult for isolated outsiders to try and approach women respectfully.

Basically, OP unwittingly (or wittingly?) elaborates on how certain social barriers are effected that makes it difficult for my introspective, self-aware outsider man to fit in with unethical norms: because he doesn't like or appreciate the group think people seem to operate on and therefore ends up begrudgingly distancing himself from these atrocious behaviours.

[–]PersonofControversy[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

who is this u/SRU_91 person? I think I might like them :)

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

:D

[–]ihopeitsnormalIncipient Hitler of the Boomers1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Niggers

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

As a mixed man Nigga is one of my favorite words ever. I genuinely became a happier man ever since I started regularly using it.

[–]i_have_a_semicolonPurple Pill Woman1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Not everyone is capable of empathy. They just want to see the world burn

[–]killallthenarcs0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

Empathy is not the solution to everything. I can very well understand how shitty it must feel to be ignored and brushed off... heck I've been ignored and brushed off pretty damn savagely, guys don't know what it is like being a tweenage girl dealing with tweenage girl friendship groupings but my memory of that era in my life is fresh and vivid. But guess what? I also know that if I'm the only one not ignoring and brushing off someone, I'm likely to end up with them firmly attached to me like a limpet, and then them blowing up when I attempt to detach them for my own comfort. Now maybe back in school with another girl and it just being friendship that was OK... but when it is a guy seeking to stick his dick in me? Danger.

In modern society there is a lot of "well I feel for you buuuuuuut..." and with very good reason.

[–]WhatIsTheMeaningHere0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

guys don't know what it is like being a tweenage girl dealing with tweenage girl friendship groupings but my memory of that era in my life is fresh and vivid.

Silly girl with your vivid memories. My high school and middle school experiences were so traumatic that I don't even remember them.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I have one word. COPE

[–]Merger-ArbitrageTriggermaster, Non-Pill, Cutting through the crap...0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Likes attract likes, with few exceptions. That's that.

[–]godintraining0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

It has always been the same... guys want a good girl to turn them bad, girls want bad guys to turn them good...

[–]wtknightGen X Slacker0 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy Link

People embrace their animal urges these days and not the aspects of humanity that make us different from other animals. These animal urges were held in check by religion in the past, and still are by some people in some parts of the world, but the number of people choosing to hold these urges in check are rapidly declining, especially in the west. It’s the embracing of these animal urges that bring about pleasure in the present but constant long-term dissatisfaction throughout one’s future that lead to people behaving erratically and in contradictory manners.

[–]praisethesun799Not actually a fag 😉0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy Link

Lol "animal urges" XD the world is safer from "animal urges than ever before in history. People are free to fuck who they want , whoop di do 🙄 Society is the best it's ever been bro , life's what you make of it

[–]wtknightGen X Slacker0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

It’s the Wild West of sex. That’s not an ideal society. Socially enforced monogamy where the focus is on emotional connections rather than tingles is the ideal.

[–]praisethesun799Not actually a fag 😉1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I disagree, I think more freedom is better. But i understand you might have different values. "Socially enforced monogamy" is would be against the sociosexual progress of the last centuries in western societies though

[–]wtknightGen X Slacker0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

It’s not progress at all, but regression due to the development of birth control leading to an increase in sex addiction. If everyone waited to have sex with only people who they were emotionally bonded with and were willing to have and raise a child with then the world would be a much better place.

[–]praisethesun799Not actually a fag 😉1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I understand, but i still disagree that's it's a regression, i think birth control led to an increase in personal freedom and I value a free society more than an orderly one. You value monogamy and emotional bonding, not everyone does . There is a freeforall currently tho , as there always is anytime there's a big social changes, but it always goes back to an equilibrium eventually

[–]Just_Ban_Me_Already0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

If you really want empathy, you're going to have to find a different site. When people display their Reddit version of empathy, it's almost always a pretend game.

[–]PersonofControversy[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Holy shit I come back expecting to see my entire world view blown to smithereens and about 500 people calling me some derivative of 'idiot', and actually find nice discussion and people agreeing with stuff and being polite.

Is this what hope in the human race feels like?

[–]RedPill-BlackLotusRed Pill Man0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

At the same college, if the men had some sort of party where females are not allowed to attend there would be a sjw mushroom cloud.

In my province, the only male only space is a homeless shelter and that rule is in place to protect the woman.

A man once tried to open a men's only abuse shelter and he was hammered to suicide by the feminists.

There are woman's only gyms everywhere.

I have no more empathy.

It's gone.

[–]Barneysparky0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Empathy is what makes us wise.

Do I like MAGA people? No. I dont like the idea of the world they want to create. Can I empathize? Yes. I get why they think the way they do. That's all empathy is.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Some definite truth in the OP's post. It'd be a better world if everyone period tried to understand and empathize with others.

It's even tougher if you don't feel like your gender but because you are that gender you still get treated like a cis. That can make it harder to be accepted into women's friend groups and be " one of the girls" because of the *built in assumption that you're trying to fuck them when you're really not. (If I was actually born a girl, that's one barrier I wouldn't have.)

*I'm not at all upset or hurt about women who might keep guys at more of a distance. It's totally understandable because of all the fucking creeps and psycho's in the world. I'm mad at the creeps for ruining it for everyone

[–]Atlas_B_Shruggin✡️🐈✡️ the purring jew0 points1 point  (9 children) | Copy Link

theres no such thing as empathy

[–]TedescheMRA2 points3 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

Explain, please.

[–]Atlas_B_Shruggin✡️🐈✡️ the purring jew-1 points0 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

It is a word made up in the 40s by socialists to describe something not real

[–]TedescheMRA5 points6 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

Oh, man, you’re a kook. Good-bye.

[–]Atlas_B_Shruggin✡️🐈✡️ the purring jew-2 points-1 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

So you think just because some psychologists made up the concept empathy in the 40s it describes a real phenomenon? Why?

[–]quixoticme18 points9 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Which is funny because while empathy is a nearly universal human emotion you're a great fan of the mbti which is a garbage horoscope made up by a mom and her daughter with no relationship to Jungs theory they pretended to steal, has poor psychometric validity and virtually no predictive or external validation, support or application.

[–]Merger-ArbitrageTriggermaster, Non-Pill, Cutting through the crap...5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Well, she's autistic by her own admission, so there's no surprises here.

[–]alby3330 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

All of psychology is made up

[–]quixoticme11 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

That's goofy. Here's the current edition of the latest Psychological Science journal. It should be no problem at all for you to debunk them all easily.

http://journals.sagepub.com/toc/pss/current

[–]Atlas_B_Shruggin✡️🐈✡️ the purring jew-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

True

[–]abaxeron✴️Indian Programmer0 points1 point  (10 children) | Copy Link

Yeah, sure.

Men consistently pour enormous amount of ingenuity into women's well-being, but empathy is dead.

Men subsidize women's health and retirement, but empathy is dead.

Men build and maintain the infrastructure to make women's lives comfortable, but empathy is dead.

Men institute and implement special treatment for women, but empathy is dead.

Men have rearranged the entire field of education to accomodate women, resulting in women getting more degrees of every level since 2006 or so, but empathy is dead.

Men force each other to pay for women's bad decisions at the point of the government's gun, but empathy is dead.

Men fire each other from jobs, throw each other in prison, and even kill each other, because women claim they feel unsafe, but empathy is dead.

What planet are you on?!!!

[–]WhatIsTheMeaningHere0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

But see, you realized these things, and now your empathy is probably dead for women.

[–]abaxeron✴️Indian Programmer0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I'm merely a single person; even if it was the case, why does it matter? Question the validity of money flow going from men to women, and a collective roar of womanhood will deafen you; but with a huge support from good portion, if not the majority, of male population. Merely suggest that women owe anything to men - and go deaf from silence, not roar. Silence coming from both sides.

[–]PersonofControversy[S] 0 points1 point  (7 children) | Copy Link

I really, really think, that attributing all of that to empathy on the part of individual men, is just as fallacious as feminists attributing 'the patriarchy' to oppressive behavior on the part of individual men.

Just paying taxes, without really thinking or caring (or begrudging) what those dollars are spent on, is not empathy. Just living in the world and doing what you are told, and having that indirectly help women, is not empathy, in the same way just living in the world and acting normally, and having that indirectly hurt women, is not sexist.

If you wake up in the morning and go "You know what? I think having a uterus and having babies is hard and I'm going to pay these taxes to make it easier." then I would agree with you; Empathy is well and alive.

But, at least in my experience, most men pay for all that stuff in the form of taxes, and most men aren't thinking about where their tax dollars are going (except when it's election time). We just pay them because the government says 'pay this or go to jail'.

That's not empathy. That's following the rules made either by men more emphatic than the normal person or, more likely, women advocating to make the world better for themselves (or men pressured by women advocates to make the world better for women), which removes empathy from the equation entirely.

[–]abaxeron✴️Indian Programmer0 points1 point  (6 children) | Copy Link

Ah, so you limit the word "empathy" to the Realm of the Unfalsifiable, such as feelings, intentions and thoughts, rather than actions and their results? - In that case, I'm more likely to believe that "empathy" was never alive, humans were always extremely good at making up retroactive justifications for their actions, and if empathy is dead, it should stay dead.

[–]PersonofControversy 1 points [recovered]  (5 children) | Copy Link

??? You can't possibly not see what I'm trying to say. You can't possibly believe empathy is actually what you say it is. Emotion isn't Unfalsifiable; there's literally been brain imaging studies showing the acute existence of actual feelings, espcially empathy (because it's one of the easiest to prove; just google "mirror neurons", or "the scientific basis of empathy).

But even ignoring all that, my point stands and yours doesn't make sense. Just paying taxes, and not thinking about where that money is going, is not empathy. There's literally no thought involved in that, no feeling. If there were guys out there paying taxes and feeling warm and fuzzy thinking "this money is going to help more women survive breast cancer", but we both know that's not a common occurrence. To make it falsifiable, there's very little to indicate that those actions are motivated by an emotion like empathy, rather than one like duty, or fear of going to jail. A guy leading a feminist rally making a stand for female victims of sexual assault? Far more likely to be based on empathy, given that he's probably never going to be a 'female victim'. The more cynical might say he's just trying to get laid by white-knighting, but at least that's more plausible than 'men pay taxes because they feel the plight of women'.

A woman making a stand against false rape accusations would be the same deal. She's probably never going to be falsely accused, but she's spending her CONSCIOUSLY helping anyways. That's an action that could plausibly be rooted in empathy.

There. I've given you a more falsifiable approach. Actions that involve consciously helping to improve the lot of groups one doesn't belong to, and are likely to never belong to, are actions that can possibly be attributed to empathy. But please don't say that empathy was never alive, because that's just factually wrong.

[–]abaxeron✴️Indian Programmer0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy Link

??? You can't possibly not see what I'm trying to say.

Okay, let's see if you'll enlighten me.

Emotion isn't Unfalsifiable; there's literally been brain imaging studies showing the acute existence of actual feelings, espcially empathy (because it's one of the easiest to prove; just google "mirror neurons", or "the scientific basis of empathy).

Oh; so empathy IS NOT dead according to the very studies you base your original argument on.

Just paying taxes, and not thinking about where that money is going, is not empathy.

How about spending money on one's wife and daughters? Especially when millions of women screech on the top of their lungs that it's an act of oppression for the last 250 years or so.

If there were guys out there paying taxes and feeling warm and fuzzy

Most men don't know that women DON'T pay taxes. xxxxxxx

To make it falsifiable, there's very little to indicate that those actions are motivated by an emotion like empathy, rather than one like duty

I'll take duty over "warm and fuzzy" 10 times out of 10. Gets shit done better.

[–]PersonofControversy 1 points [recovered]  (3 children) | Copy Link

luls and now you're just getting pendantic. This is pointless, but I'll try one more time. Empathy exists. That's what I say is proven in a concrete, empirical way. I'm complaining about how nobody seems to actually fucking use it, and if you can't understand something as simple as that then I'm afraid my empathy has failed me; I can't understand how you seem to be thinking.

I don't really get your argument about spending money on family, since it's almost completely unrelated to anything I mentioned in my actual post, but you do you I guess.

I clicked on one of the links you posted on women not paying taxes, and it was complete nonsense so I don't even want to touch that. But even if it was true, I do not understand how that would affect my point at all.

And for your last comment, on duty... yes? Duty is better than empathy at getting things done. I can agree with that. But Duty vs. Empathy literally has nothing to do with this discussion, and the fact that you brought it up shows me that you're just grasping at straws at this point, desperate to be right about something.

Barely anything you bring up seems to be attacking my central thesis. Instead you keep diverting the discussion off into your own personal agenda, and try to make me defend that instead, because you know you can't refute my actual points.

So there. I hope you've been enlightened, but at this point I just think you understood what I was trying to say perfectly the first time, but just felt like it attacked your world view, and so tried to get me to take on your entire philosophy instead of just conceding this one point. But I really have no interest in going off about things I never wanted to talk about in the first point so... luls.

[–]abaxeron✴️Indian Programmer0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

Yeah, you're right; I'm spending quite a little time on Reddit and sometimes lose the main point while trying to break it down into subpoints.

The main point is simple: it takes getting deceived once to stop listening and believing. It takes getting backstabbed once to stop turning your back on people. It takes being poked enough times to develop tougher skin. I can't speak for women's lack of empathy to men (since I tend to believe they simply never had it); men lost their empathy through constant flow of deception and failed promises. Women said "Give us education, and we'll be better wives" (Wollstonecraft for reference) - half a century later, the divorce epidemic floods the West like Egyptian plague. Women said "Make us economically independent, and we won't burden our husbands with the necessity to support us" - as a result, almost instantly, women stopped being dependent on their husbands and started being dependent on the state (which is dependent on men - thus, the link I provided is more than relevant). Women said "Let us into the workforce, it'll be better for everyone" - and it became worse for everyone. Women said "We want equality" - and as soon as said equality became a real, tangible perspective, started backpedalling into "No-no, not here; and not here either; and not here; also here we need some additional leverage, you filthy patriarchists". Legalisation of abortion did not solve single motherhood problem. Duluth model did not eliminate domestic violence. Influx of ideologically charged women into professor positions in colleges did not result in hundreds of female Nobel prize winners in physics, but rather turned higher education into a joke.

It's only natural that at a certain point, you either start responding with "I don't believe you", or get ridden into early grave like a good little wage slave. Any person who tries to accuse me of not understanding what it means to be a woman - almost definitely is trying to leech off of me. I don't understand what it means to be a woman, and I don't care anymore.

[–]PersonofControversy[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

wow. I did not expect such a calm, well-worded, honest reply. Thank you, for stopping the online shouting match this was quickly turning into.

I can't say I agree with everything you've said, but seeing that you have opinions you actually seem to have thought carefully about, and honestly believe, does make me feel better about these kind of debate subs in general.

[–]abaxeron✴️Indian Programmer0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Thanks! Seriously, I'd be glad if I could put more time into better wording and argument delivery, but such cases, I have a kid and two pets :D

[–]Whodunnit88Survivied Purge Week 2018-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Whatever

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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