Standards for men are much higher than for women

Ultramegasaurus · 2018-03-14T19:13:53+00:00

Don't forget that women are allowed to cheat on their flaws a lot more than men, in addition to being less consequential in general. Women have makeup and a myriad of socially acceptable clothing and styling choices which conceal flaws and emphasizes good parts.

Men on the other hand cannot hide an ugly, pockmarked face behind makeup. Men cannot wear high heels to appear taller. Men cannot wear toupees to hide their balding. Men cannot wear anything similar to push-up bras. "Cannot" as in, it's not socially acceptable. These things are widely considered insincere and insecure, often even comically so.

jackandjill22 · 2018-03-14T18:09:27+00:00

Natural selection is a biiiaaaacth!

I mean, you don't see pretty and handsome people complaining about those things ;)

UnjustDuality · 2018-03-14T18:15:33+00:00

I’m just going to leave this here

https://theblog.okcupid.com/your-looks-and-your-inbox-8715c0f1561e

TheGreasyPole · 2018-03-14T17:42:49+00:00

Grow up and be an adult about it.

Men like looking at pretty women and women like looking at handsome men.

The people with a problem here is not society at large, but the people who whine about it. So far that seems to be feminist women and incel men.

So that’s who needs to get their heads straight.

We shouldn’t join them (the feminists whining about unrealistic body image) we should beat them. Metaphorically of course. I’m not advocating taking a hammer to the nearest feminist.

RockinSocksII · 2018-03-14T16:46:14+00:00

This is pretty funny considering the women that were posted as "average" in the other thread were hot.

Salty-Bastard · 2018-03-14T17:06:05+00:00

Welcome to the Burden of Performance.

wtknight · 2018-03-14T17:10:28+00:00

Everyone has high standards. Men just settle before women do because men are sexually thirstier.

theambivalentrooster · 2018-03-14T18:21:12+00:00

Men set standards for women, women set standards for men. You could ask men to set higher standards for women instead of asking women to lower their standards.

InformalCriticism · 2018-03-15T02:26:16+00:00

I've said it many times before in this sub: the bar for a "good woman" to clear is indefensibly lower than a man's. It's our sex drive, mate - the more demand, the less spending power. Pure econ 101.

Reed_4983 · 2018-03-14T17:52:20+00:00

Not really. Seems a lot of physically unattractive men feel as though male beauty standards are impossibly high when in actuality women are attracted to average men all the times. Just not to ugly ones.

antariusz · 2018-03-14T23:12:28+00:00

that the "ideal" image (think Henry Cavill as Superman or Hugh Jackman as Wolverine)

Ideal image according to whom? Your examples are movies that are mostly geared towards a male audience. In my observation movies and series with an overwhelmingly male audience (especially action movies/series, violent/action videogames, and typically "nerdy" things) are the ones that feature the most handsome, suave, muscular/juiced up men.

Movies and series that are aimed at a female or mixed audience often feature men with more realistic bodies. Of course there are exceptions, and all men in movies still have gorgeous faces, but then again that goes for women too.

Men don't care about income

Men don't care about income when looking to hook up, or when most women they interact with have a similar income and social status as they do.

And yes some men, especially rich and powerful ones, use their assets to get the hottest woman they can find without regard to anything else. However, most UMC/UC men end up dating women with a background similar to their own. And a man at the high end of the middle class is still very unlikely to end up with a woman from a dirt poor family that hardly ever managed to make ends meet, unless that woman managed to get a college education and has worked herself up well into the middle class as well. Again, exceptions exist, but they're exceptions for a reason.

A man will not really care about how "sexually experienced" a woman is

Again, I'm not sure what world you live in, but most men do care. No man wants a girlfriend who has had sex with the entire football team in high school and another few dozen men in college. And while female virgins are romanticized plenty of men reject virgins because they do not want to be the very first, especially if the woman is past her early 20s.

It seems men truly have preferences while women have requirements

Men who are in a position to have requirements have requirements, so do women who can afford to have requirements. Everyone else has preferences.

TL;DR just because you don't have a standard doesn't mean that other men don't have a standard either.

reluctantly_red · 2018-03-14T19:33:24+00:00

The big difference is the amount of effort required. A woman with decent genetics just has to eat reasonably well and buy a few cloths that fit well. A guy with decent genetics has to do that too AND he has to hit the gym AND he has to get the credentials and experience to make money.

simcity4000 · 2018-03-14T19:50:21+00:00

Looking good for a women implies some genetic luck and some maintenance

"Some maintainance" is underplaying the amount of shit women do, as well as how much it costs. You ever seen how much make up goes for?

Wheras, as a guy "doing your hair" means going to the barbers once in a while, no salon treatments required or expected. Doing your face means wearing moisturiser. A guy might have something like 3 sets of shoes (nice casual/smart/running shoes). You're not expected to pluck eyebrows or shave anywhere other than maybe your face (unless you don't want to shave there either). Getting a few scars or wrinkles around the eyes as you grow older can be seen as sexy etc.

The idea that many or even most men put as much effort into maintaining their looks as the average woman makes no sense to me. Women carry round bags full of tools in their daily life purely for aesthetic maintance - and partly because the clothes that look good on them have no functional pockets.

swegggz · 2018-03-14T23:36:46+00:00

I agree, but I think that it's unfortunately just part of nature. If I remember correctly, approximately 80% of women and only 40% of men that ever existed reproduced. Natural selection seems to act through female choice, leaving low quality males with no luck.

antariusz · 2018-03-15T09:19:44+00:00

It’s somewhat shocking to me, as a 35 year old man at how mainstream steroids have become.

It used to just be a few, notable, movie stars, Stallone, Schwarzenegger. Now it’s roughly 75% of the big male stars. It’s just “accepted” that that’s how things are and if you’re a man, you adapt, you do what you need to do to compete.

WestsideMoonWalker · 2018-03-14T17:17:19+00:00

while a man has to have top genetics, put a huge amount of work and dedication

Lol. Just don't eat unhealthy and gain a shitton of weight. You can weigh nothing and look well-defined as long as you don't put on fat.

This may be controversial for some people but the human male doesn't even look impressive without steroids or other substances, no matter how much he trains

So what you are saying is you like bodybuilders.

Even the image of the "average" man is deceiving. Humans have a lot of variability so you can be tall with a small dick, muscular but short, tall with a big dick but dumb as a rock, handsome but a drug addict, a really cool guy but doesn't last long in bed. A hypothetical totally average man will beat all of these men because he can't go wrong in any aspect so discussing about the "average" man is pointless.

Oh my god. You figured it out! Men are totally an amalgamation of various traits. How could I have known THAT? A true revelation.

Men aren't like that. Men don't care about income

Lol really? My girlfriend makes a significant amount more than me. It's pretty nice. Seriously though, I would never consider dating someone making a decent amount less than I do.

A man will not really care about how "sexually experienced" a woman is, it has no benefit to him

This is why super promiscuous men always end up with virgin brides, right? /s

It seems men truly have preferences while women have requirements and this thinking can cause resentment towards their future partners

If you like men so much, go date them. For real though, I have requirements too. Everyone does.

Not to mention that men are ridiculed even for daring to approach women, the standards are high even when simply initiating a conversation. You don't have to look like a "creep", it's ridiculous.

As a goofy socially awkward guy, I cannot say I have ever experienced this.

This is a literal shitpost.

Willow-girl · 2018-03-15T12:38:03+00:00

I'll believe that when I see men cramming themselves into Spanx and getting bikini waxes. :-)

mistercheeez-o____O- · 2018-03-20T23:30:53+00:00

I will admit that it would feel like a luxury to have feelings for a woman, and date her without constantly thinking about not "fucking it up" all of the time.

At the end of the day though, It would be great if we weren't judged so quickly in negative ways, but I try and stay natural when I'm on a date instead of psyching myself out. Not an easy task, but I have had moments of brief success.

goatismycopilot · 2018-03-14T18:03:42+00:00

The feminists ( fill in blank on stuff that makes you mad/sad/butthurt ) do this ( undesirable thing/make voodoo magic) that causes ( bad stuff/ pouty face/icky stuff) OP to link many things to make many generalities that are berry berry bad.

PM-ME-YOUR-STOMACH · 2018-03-23T12:49:31+00:00

This is something I agree with. Getting buff as hugh Hackman is almost purely genetics. For example there was a class I did in high school where it as just basically intense workouts every day. Me and 2 of my other friends basically just lost fat. One of my friends though, who I’m guessing had hypertrophy or something, got super buff in like one semester. For the thing with women and losing weight there’s also some genetics there, like where they lose fat first, and where they gain fat in general. It’s just calories in < calories out. I’ve seen the thing too that women like average men, but this is said by women and I don’t know what average is to women at this point, it’s completely all over the place. I’ve seen women say that 6 ft is average, 7 inch dick is average.

NordJitsu · 2018-03-14T19:42:49+00:00

So I’m very decidedly not average. I’m 6’5 and 220 lbs. I’ve got low body fat and good muscle. I don’t look as muscular as Superman or Wolverine or Captain America, but I look damn good.

That said, I 100% agree with you. I’ve struck the genetic lottery and still have to work my ass off to get close the male “ideal.”

Women don’t even really have to exercise to achieve peak hotness. Just don’t be a fat slob. Eat a reasonable calorie restricted diet and do some light activity a few times a week. Your average woman can stay in shape just by eating right and talking a 20 min walk 2-4 times a week.

Now, some men prefer women who do squats (for the ass) or ab work (for a lean stomach) but this isn’t required for hotness the same way muscles on a man are.

Ultramegasaurus · 2018-03-14T19:08:51+00:00

The "men are the shallow gender with too strict beauty standards" is part projection and part apex fallacy.

Projection because it's women with the high standards and women who judge each other harshly, so they think men do too.

Apex fallacy because most women only care about a small minority of attractive men who can afford to be picky. The leniency of average Joe is frequently dismissed entirely.

Electra_Cute · 2018-03-14T16:48:27+00:00

Okay, so let us pretend everything you wrote in this post is true. So what?

Five_Decades · 2018-03-15T06:08:26+00:00

Women evaluate men on a longer list of traits than men evaluate women.

In some ways it sucks for men because women are more demanding, but in other ways it is a benefit. Even if you suck in some areas, you can compensate in others. There are more opportunities to prove value.

However for women, if you are low in fertility (old and ugly) your options are going to not be good. Men are evaluated on more traits, so there are more opportunities for redemption or building value.

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A_Wizard1717 · 2018-03-15T09:08:16+00:00

Males have to compete for women whats new. buuuuut i get your point

eliechallita · 2018-03-15T16:46:26+00:00

Henry Caville is to the average man as Jennifer Lawrence is to the average woman, generally speaking.

If men don't care about many criteria regarding their partners, that says a lot more about men than it does about women.

bagoonga · 2018-03-15T18:33:26+00:00

There is no general set of standards because individuals vary. It's flawed to presuppose that there is one. The standards you list are not everyone's.

Looking good for a women implies some genetic luck and some maintenance while a man has to have top genetics, put a huge amount of work and dedication.

I would say this is true for me, but for some guys there are almost no standards and others want nothing less than fancy-looking (for lack of a better word).

This may be controversial for some people but the human male doesn't even look impressive without steroids or other substances, no matter how much he trains. I know most women don't prefer muscular guys but the idea is that the "ideal" image (think Henry Cavill as Superman or Hugh Jackman as Wolverine) is extremely hard to get, even for genetically gifted men.

Exactly, most women don't want this. This is a pop culture ideal that not everyone wants. Also, it's just as hard if not harder to have pretty much no body fat on a regular basis and not look like a heroin addict. When you're building muscle, the amount of calories you consume doesn't matter as much as when you're trying to stay at a certain weight and not be too muscular (the "ideal" for women in pop culture).

Even the image of the "average" man is deceiving. Humans have a lot of variability so you can be tall with a small dick, muscular but short, tall with a big dick but dumb as a rock, handsome but a drug addict, a really cool guy but doesn't last long in bed. A hypothetical totally average man will beat all of these men because he can't go wrong in any aspect so discussing about the "average" man is pointless.

Unless you factor in the standard they're being judged on changing for each specific woman doing the judging. Some women like small dicks, some like big dicks, some don't give a shit, some will date junkies, some won't, etc.

Men aren't like that. Men don't care about income, height and other things. A man will not really care about how "sexually experienced" a woman is, it has no benefit to him. It seems men truly have preferences while women have requirements and this thinking can cause resentment towards their future partners (maybe a cause of the high rate divorce initiated by women?).

Lol. I'm a guy and I care about all of those things you mentioned. In an SO I want someone making as much money as me or more because I'd rather spend my own money on my own stuff. I find heights between 5'3 and 5'7 most attractive. I care about their level of sexual experience, but mostly their recent because it doesn't matter to me (from a relationship standpoint) if someone was promiscuous years ago if they're not now. But it's something I want to know about.

I think you're just frustrated because you imagine most women's standards being higher than your own.

AFuzzyMuffin · 2018-03-14T20:38:39+00:00

Fantastic post sim. It is one of the sad truths of being a woman.