Recently, I was walking through the mall. This, in and of itself, is not a momentous occasion. However, I realized something really important. This is a long field report. You've been warned brahs.
I had a super big red pill moment. And it took me back to a flashback of my BP days.
So, a little flashback...
When I used to walk through the mall, I would be there for a purpose, I would be going to a store. I would have my focus on this, and not let it wander. Crowds bothered me and being around people wasn't my thing, at least, not talking to random people. I would see beautiful women walk by, and think, "Gosh, I wish I knew somebody that knew her." Back in the day, cold approaching would have sounded like robbing a bank.
I wouldn't notice the people around me often nor how I was fitting into my surroundings. I came, I did my business, I left.
Then, I found game, pickup, and my life started improving. This was about five or six years ago. Recently I found this sub, and it's helped to fill in experiences and gaps in my life that game could never fill. It's given me tools to maintain, create, and demolish relationships depending on what has to happen. Time has also taught me the importance of nonverbal communication, and as a result, has made me invest a lot of time into learning it and observing it while I'm interacting with people.
I'm not a large guy, but I'm in good shape, semi muscular build and like I said, I've studied a lot of body language things so I know how to hold myself (shoulders back, hips underneath, abs tight, chest up, etc) and practice posture a lot.
I've also noticed that 94% of people in public have HORRIBLE POSTURE. HORRIBLE. Terrible. Like idfk how you even get out of bed in the morning without a headache posture.
This brings me back to the trip to the mall a couple of weeks ago.
I walk to Subway to get a sandwich. I'm standing in line. HB8.5 (call her OD for orange dress from now on) walks and stands in line next to me. I don't flinch, hold my posture and continue looking at the menu. I saw her when I first got in line briefly, I know she's attractive, but I'm not sure how attractive. Either way, I'm fucking hungry, so I'm going to keep looking at the menu and I'll give her a peek when I've decided what I want to eat.
In the midst of deciding, and at this point I'm down to the oven roasted chicken or the sweet onion chicken, which are about two of the only things that are worth eating there anyway (not to say others don't taste good, but at least the chicken is a distant cousin to a fitness diet) I can feel her staring at me.
So I just very nonchalantly turn my head over and stare right at her and we lock eyes for about a half a second before hers jump away wildly. I watch her body language and she starts to shift, plays with her hair, etc. but I, still looking at her up and down, have not shifted. I gaze for 3-4 seconds, just long enough to make it known that's what I'm doing, and turn back to the menu.
This, all, while HOLDING MY POSTURE. Shoulders back, head up, chest out, hips under, abs tight.
I have held myself, my posture, my frame, and my position, as well as sub-communicating that for this moment, right now, where we stand, my space is mine, and if she wants to be in it or even to look at me in it, she'll have to show some submission, and she has, by looking away.
I decide to give it a go with this chick, since there's still three or four people in front of me and I have some time to kill.
"You know, I don't think that you should be allowed to wear that dress."
This was my opener. It wasn't extravagant or ridiculously intricate, but I thought of it fast. That's what matters. I think acting quickly in situations like these is important, or else you start to look more and more timid when you finally do act because it's almost like you were psyching yourself up for it. For others, it'll happen faster with time. It was my in with this girl and it was the first one I thought of, and it doesn't matter if it's weak, strong, etc. Once you're past the opener, it's gone and over. How many times have you heard a girl say, "I thought he was a goof at first, but then..." and her hamster proceeds to give you the reason she wishes was true that she fell for him, but in reality, she just wanted her shit pounded and he seemed like a good option at the time.
So her dress, it's orange, bright, and we're in the PNW Seattle area, Seahawks are our football team, we beat the Broncos for the SB last year for those that have no clue Bleacher Report and the NFL exist, and I'm going to tease her for being a Broncos fan. But, it is a sexy dress, and by pointing it out I risk her thinking that I'm pointing it out because it looks good, hot, etc, which isn't horrible, but don't open with "You're just so sexy in that dress, omg you look so good," you want her to not have any fucking clue what's going to come out of your mouth, but when the words do come, they should seem natural, perfect, and congruent.
So I tell her she shouldn't be wearing the dress. She laughed and looked at me for a second, I turned back to the menu. She said, "and why is that exactly?"
I say, "Why do YOU think?"
She goes, "Because it's too short and I'm showing too much skin?"
And I say, "No, because it's orange, and it's obvious you're a Denver fan to all of us, so we should run you out of this mall for it" but tone here is important, the grin, body language again, I've shifted open towards her just a bit, still leaning back and holding my body's space.
Then she throws me into a fucking head spin with this next comment, and it took me a second to respond just right. I look back at the menu for a moment to take my gaze away, and she hits me.
She goes, "Maybe I should just take it off, then." and I can feel her looking at me.
Well, fuck. I can't let her out-escalate me, so I figure this is about the time I'm going to:
A. Touch a hot woman in a moment in a Subway line to hold my frame and either she'll like it or I'll get into an altercation with some mall cops.
B. Chuckle, laugh, and fuck this up with a hot chick because I mis-calibrated myself and she's escalating verbally faster than I thought she ever would in a Subway line.
The second option would have made me hate myself that evening and since I'm not in that line of business, I take the bait.
I go, "Okay, arms up." She says, "What?"
I said, "If you're going to take it off, then arms up, I'll help." She instantly retracted her statement obviously and started getting embarrassed, rounded out her shoulders a bit, giggled, and smacked me on the arm and said, "haha you're funny."
As soon as she smacked me on my arm, I pulled out my phone and said, "Save your appetite."
She said, "What?" I said, "Save your appetite. You heard me. What's your number? I'm going to call you in two hours, is that long enough to go home and change, and get ready?" and as I said this placed my hand onto the back of her upper arm and made eye contact until she answered.
She goes, "Call me for what?" and I said, "I'm going to take you out to dinner, so save your appetite, go home, and get ready. I need your number." and as I said this, released my hand, turned it palm up while explaining concisely what was going to happen and what I was going to do (LEAD THEM).
Short, concise, I didn't flinch when she said, "Call me for what". Some guys will back track here and say, "Well if you aren't busy, yadda yadda I was wondering if maybe just maybe pls you want to go out wit me plz later?"
Fuck that shit. What do you have to lose? Nothing.
So just tell her, I'm taking you out. You're going to enjoy it. If you don't want that, it doesn't matter, because some other woman will. Abundance guys.
She gives me her number and I go, "I'm calling it to make sure you're not a liar, too" and obviously it's real, she has my number now, cool.
"I'll talk to you in a bit," she's confused. Says, "okay," I say, "Great!" and give her a hug, she turns, walks, looks back and smiles once, and walks out of the food court.
Me, I plowed down on my Subway, so that I wasn't bloated later and tempted to eat too much for after dinner when I was pounding her guts out.
Long story short, we go out to Outback, have dinner, a couple drinks, bounce to my place to "watch S1Ep1 of Entourage because she loves that show" and the DVD rolls through the entire season auto playing while we break a mounting bracket on my sectional couch. And later almost fall off the bed onto one of my Pomeranians.
She left the next morning about 5:30 AM, but as she was leaving and saw my man pipe again, she couldn't resist blowing it one more time. Why? Because that's the type of guy she saw me as, that's the dick she's dreamt about hanging off of all her life. And now she's found it.
And six years ago, I would NEVER have had this experience.
Why do I think this turned out how it did? A bit of game, a bit of posture, I'm in shape, but before all you white knights run in here with that "OH UR PROBABLY SO TALL AND AESTHETIC" male hamstering bullshit. Yes, I dress decently. Yes, I get haircuts. Yes, I shave. No, I am not Brad Pitt. I am 5 foot 7 fucking inches, would be the shortest or fattest or smallest guy in the room just a few years ago.
This shit didn't come naturally to me. I worked for it. I took a ton of chances like this one and fell on my face like a piece of shit and felt embarrassed, ashamed, hurt. Don't. Those feelings are stupid, and weak. Take these chances but let them help you grow. My journey was more painful than some, but it was necessary. Know you are the shit. Know you are something special to this world, and throw your mother fucking shoulders back, dust em off and be that.
She got the idea I didn't really give a fuck from the first moment. That's what matters. Don't be connected. Don't give a fuck. Do you. But know you're doing you. And know you're doing YOU for YOU, not for bitches. Not for your parents or friends or family. FOR YOU. Know you're the shit. Chest is out, shoulders are back, hips are under and abs are tight because you're a bad mother fucker that nobody can phase. Because no matter what happens to you, you will drive towards your goals and ambitions and change yourself and challenge yourself.
Because you walk your path, and see through bullshit, distractions and chode fuckers that want to get in your way and ruin your day.
You think six years ago my BP faggot self would have said any shit to this girl? No. He would not have. But I did on this day. And on this day, I met a girl in an orange dress while I was getting Subway, that most guys would only watch walk down the street and say, "damn" at, and effectively made her realize there are alpha guys in the world that will take her by the hand and bang her brains out, without judging her or making it a high pressure situation for her to live up to.
But, while that's all well and good, that's not the red pill moment. Sure, banged hot chick. Check. Ran good game, check. Kept frame, check. That's not the red pill moment I mentioned at the beginning of this field report.
Want to know the BEST part of the entire fucking story? I didn't even get her mother fucking name until she showed up to dinner.
The initial pickup occurred, without me ever thinking, "Oh I need her name," because it didn't matter, and she didn't bring it up, because she didn't care to. Was it conscious? No. Do I normally get a girl's name? Of course. But my name doesn't attract her, my body and posture and frame did. And hers to me, but this is the first time this has happened to me and it was a wake up call that all this work to swallow that red pill was paying off.
I subconsciously ran my game, with an objective, and didn't sway from it, even to get a name. So every time she dumps a BP-BB, I'll be right there to receive the, "what's going down tonight" text.
All because of a combination of everything I did, but also since the oven roasted chicken sounded so good at the time.
Was getting subway at mall, hot chick came up, teased about dress, held frame, told her to get naked in line, she laughed, I ordered her to not eat Subway, got her number, got her name later at dinner, got steaks, banged it out, multiple times, broke sectional, almost killed Pomeranian. Had redpill moment when realized all this started and dinner went down without me getting her name.