My wife and I have been together for 4 years, married for 8 months. Late last night we were lying in bed post-sex, her head on my shoulder. We were talking about kids. Names and such. A few minutes go by of no talking. Then she says, "with all of the problems, you've had with your height... Maybe we should think about getting a sperm donor." I was completely shocked. After a few seconds of silence she says "sweety?" and looks up at me. I close my eyes instantly and present to be asleep.
How could she ask me that? I can't even begin to explain how much it hurts to know she doesn't think I'm good enough to father her children. I lay awake all last night unable to sleep. In the past I've told her about my insecurities - the way some girls have treated me because of my height, as you do when you trust someone. It's not fair and it sucks to be judged on something you can't change, but I'm still successful and looked up to by people (figuratively, not physically of course :P).
I've never once suggested sperm donation, she thought it up all on her own. I honestly don't know what to say to her about this. There is virtually nothing that she could have said that would have hurt me more, surely she knows that. I have a tendency of biting my tongue, sucking it up and saying nothing, but I feel like I have to say something. I am honestly considering walking out on her. In what universe is it okay to ask a man something like that? I need some kind of advice. Is this an okay question to ask? Am I overreacting?
tl;dr: I was lying in bed with my wife when she asked if we should get a sperm donor. I have no how to approach this situation, or what to do.
EDIT: I thought I'd give a little more info for those that are interested. I've only discussed my height with my wife on two occasions. They were both those mutual "I love you so much and I want to know everything about you moments." We talked about the people we dated, our past relationships, rejections and insecurities. Yes, it was a pussy move to pretend I was asleep, but I had literally no idea how to respond, so it was the easiest way to get some time to think. There are some huge leaps happening, so I'll just say that I've never been bullied because of my height. The only time I've ever been insecure about my height is in the dating realm. Even then, it was only for the brief period after summoning the courage to ask a girl out and being told "sorry I don't date short guys." Oh, and I'm 5'4
I couldn't help but cringe when I read this. Here is a guy planning to start a family with a woman he loves and trusts, and she completely blindsides him with the revelation that she'd rather not have a child with his genes. I'm sure some guys in here are going to call him a pussy for pretending to be asleep instead of kicking her ass out of the house, but I can kinda understand it. When you receive a revelation that shakes your entire world to the core, sometimes your brain needs time to process something like that.
I know from dating profiles on apps like Tinder that women can be pretty cruel when it comes to short guys. But still... ouch!