TheRedArchive

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Something I kind of wanted to write to you guys, both as a sort of protest against the "life improvement" stuff on Seddit, and frankly, for myself.

There are no PUA's on Seddit anymore, just self-therapists. The theory being that if you, as a man, "improves himself", he'll become more qualified to go out and have sex with women. Thing is, no one actually says it this way, the actual words are glossed over...because no one actually wants to admit this. Everytime someone on seddit writes that they are interested in seduction in order to improve himself, I just read "I'm not yet good enough to be with women."

But women are an incredibly corrupt standard to judge your value by. Unveiling the female imperative shows that women aren't these impartial arbiters of who and what should have value in society.

At one time I actually believed something like "Success with women is, at least, a pretty good sign that you're doing well in life." But some months later, my sex life repaired, I'm now sure this is a naivete.

There are two important senses in which it is believed that it is women who are the measure of a man. First is the Seddit "Life Improvement" sense, where you have value in terms of what women say or believe are attractive. The second sense is an alternative sense that I picked up from reading Rollo/Heartiste, that you value is about how Alpha you are. Basically, the more you get laid, by the more women, the more Alpha you, and therefore the more masculine you are.

But in both cases, we're just defining ourselves in terms of what we lack. I used to read Seddit/Manosphere blogs all the time because of what I lacked, and I was getting close to defining myself in those terms.

But rather than looking at our value as men in terms of other women, we forget something drastically important: Other men. Fellow men are the only ones who will have genuine respect for our accomplishments, for what we do in life. Women, as it happens, are extraordinarily narcissistic and solipsistic: They ultimately are only interested in themselves. Sure, there's always the maternal instinct there that makes them look more altruistic, but they will never grasp what we do.

And even beyond that, rather than care about what other men think about us, how about our own opinion? That's the height of confidence right there, and no one's really going to understand how much higher you can go than anyone will see you or reach for you. There are even Omegas out there who climb up this mountain on their own, and they don't care to look back down where all the women are swarming.

There are Alphas out there who are getting laid constantly, living in a trailer, working a minimum wage job, and do I really respect such a man? Even after you've knocked the pussy off the pedestal, you'll never find yourself in some woman's vagina.

So in that sense, if you game, then game, but it shouldn't be anything more than a hobby. I get sick of people who want to generalize game into this capitalized Game, as if all of life is about the eternal search through the desert for the ultimate pussy. There are guys who are seriously getting into meditation, seeing therapists, watching hours of pickup videos, and spending small fortunes on bootcamps, in order to get laid.

I lost interest in Game when I realized that women can't make me happy. Women are like mirages in the desert that makes happiness look like it's closer than ever, or right around the bend, but the faster you chase after it, the faster she flees away.


[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

It's great not to need female validation. But ergo women are solipsistic narcissists? I don't get your logic.

Game is not the be-all of my existence. I just like having better insight into social dynamics. It goes well beyond meeting women into things like sales, marketing, raising money for a startup.

[–]pk_atheist2 points [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link

He's not using that as justification that women are solipsistic or narcissists. That part is assumed- check out the blog on the sidebar for reasons why we believe that.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah but by the measure I think guys are too. When you walk down the street and see a girl you wanna fuck, you don't think about her emotional state (unless you learn Game, in which case its just a tactic).

It's a meaningless distinction, but if you embrace it as an operating model I think it fucks up your relationship with the world.

[–]squarehouse[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Like pk_atheist said, I didn't justify that women are solipsistic and narcissistic. There are many reasons for this, the primary reason is because women are the bearers of the womb. In evolutionary terms, women are primary, men are secondary, and genuine concern beyond themselves and the people they love is just a fundamental absurdity to them.

I could give you a thousand signs of this, but once you have the eye for this, you'll see them on your own.

[–]pk_atheist1 points [recovered] (5 children) | Copy Link

I disagree that there's a choice for most of us when it comes to women making us happy. From an evolutionary standpoint, we're driven not to be happy unless we're getting our dicks wet. And I, for one, hate it. I do. I wish it weren't that way. But I know that if I haven't been attempting to pick up women, that I am miserable and I'm predisposed to depression.

I'm not saying I wouldn't rather it be your way- women can't make me happy- but it's not true. I see it differently. Chasing women can't give you the ideal setup you've been promised, and in that sense you will never achieve happiness. If you chase women, you're likely to be disappointed 99% of the time. If you end in a relationship, it's 99% likely to end in dispair. But there's still that sliver of a chance that you do things to benefit you and throw out the false notion of a happily ever after and get what you want.

Whereas MGTOW have a 100% chance of trying to ignore their instincts and I think if it were me I'd suffer.

[–]squarehouse[S] 2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

I think I'm looking at this more from the standpoint of guys who are married, or in LTR's, and this state doesn't promise happiness. There are lots of miserable couples out there.

I know I was unhappy without women in my life, but women aren't the cure to unhappiness either. Or check out Rule 3 on Heartiste's blog:

III. You shall make your mission, not your woman, your priority

Forget all those romantic cliches of the leading man proclaiming his undying love for the woman who completes him. Despite whatever protestations to the contrary, women do not want to be “The One” or the center of a man’s existence. They in fact want to subordinate themselves to a worthy man’s life purpose, to help him achieve that purpose with their feminine support, and to follow the path he lays out. You must respect a woman’s integrity and not lie to her that she is “your everything”. She is not your everything, and if she is, she will soon not be anymore.

Thing is, all the "gurus" pretty much agree on this point.

Whereas MGTOW have a 100% chance of trying to ignore their instincts and I think if it were me I'd suffer.

Valid point. I guess in the end I'm not sure.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

This is not an original insight, and women have the same problem. If you read women's dating blogs a lot of them talk about the importance of being happy alone and not thinking a man will solve all your problems.

[–]squarehouse[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Didn't claim it's original, but I think it's something that people, like sedditors, need to hear.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Sorry, that came off as dickish to say it was unoriginal. My point was that you hear similar things on the female dating blogs. I don't think it's gender-specific.

[–]dreamingawake09 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Honestly, it's not that hard to ignore your "instincts". Especially when it comes to pussy. It's all about separation, or in my case the "M.O.B." mentality. Money over bitches, leads to more riches. For me, women are not that important, and they definitely are not signs of happiness for me because I already know that reality of the situation when it comes to dating, LTRs, or marriage. Witnessing my parents divorce while I was in middle school opened my eyes quite early to the reality of "love" and all that shit. LTRs eventually end, and initially I took those break-ups quite hard, last LTR I tried and eventually ended(after roughly a year and a few months), I truly didn't feel bad or sad from it. Just took a deep breath and moved on with my life.

You can take that 1% and hedge your bets on it making it, and you might get lucky. Me, I'll just spectate the chaos and move on with my own personal interests and pursuits in life. To each their own.

[–]kafkagetssum 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

But in both cases, we're just defining ourselves in terms of what we lack. I used to read Seddit/Manosphere blogs all the time because of what I lacked, and I was getting close to defining myself in those terms.

I always saw this as a curious paradox of seduction but never saw it put in words until now. Whether you use this as a motivator to get out more to the point of self-effacing(yeah right) or use it as a rationalization to put off your game it's interesting to consider.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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