Red Pill TheoryMainstream Article: 12 Signs He's Cheating... Practically a Dread Game Blueprint. (self.TheRedPill)

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[–]Endorsed ContributorTheRedPilsner 382 points383 points  (107 children)

He takes a lot more trouble over his appearance, whether that means dressing better, a sudden heavy use of aftershave, or an infatuation with the gym and lifting weights.

The implication that married people are supposed to let themselves go is incredibly depressing. And to think people wonder why marriage rates are at an all-time low and dropping.

[–]thredditsowaway 120 points121 points  (66 children)

Great observation. Even totally single people are guilty of this. I don't see how it's acceptable to be any less than 100% presentable while out of the house unless you're at the gym or working a manual job. In fact, people are shamed for "overdoing it." Crabs in a bucket, etc.

[–]TheJessee 82 points82 points [recovered]

Pretty much, i don't tell people i go to the gym but it's pretty obvious with my physique so if they ask i'll just tell them, and then they are more inclined to throw me a "does that come with a protein shake" when i'm eating a healthy meal before they'd joke to the fat guy eating junk food, you know you're doing well when people start mocking you for it, it's pretty much the best validation you can get, because the main reason people mock/hate on you is because they ain't you, and i didn't believe that either until i became that person

[–][deleted] 78 points79 points  (6 children)

They hate us cuz they ain't us

[–]pdpbigbang 50 points51 points  (3 children)

They hate us cuz they anus

[–]rpscrote 40 points41 points  (2 children)

"girl there are only gonna be 7 planets after I destroy Uranus"

[–]RedHeimdall 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Just found my new online dating opener

[–]Mightyskunk 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Heeeeeeey, lady. My dick just died. Would you mind terribly if I buried it in your ass?

[–]The_BeardedGentleman 30 points31 points  (14 children)

My chick mocked me when I first started going to the gym, with a bit of the "oh man dont miss leg day bro" and shit like that. Then after a few weeks she started picking up on my ability to do a hell of a lot more physically and my stamina in bed, and has since stfu about it.

But of course I can't really do that with friends so that they shut up haha.

[–][deleted] 34 points35 points  (1 child)

What you can do is go out with your friends and introduce them to girls that they're not confident enough to approach. That'll shut them up.

[–]The_BeardedGentleman 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Thats actually a really good idea. I might do that if were ever out and they start gettin snippy.

[–]rpscrote 14 points15 points  (1 child)

best way to increase the length of your visits to pound town? Heavy squats, deads and HIIT. Giggity.

[–]Endorsed ContributorTheRedPilsner 8 points9 points  (2 children)

Wait until other women start checking you out in public. That will really motivate your girlfriend to step up her own game.

[–]Grompher 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've had it happen. GF just hamstered away accusations.

[–]Mightyskunk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wife gets super tingles when that happens. She loves owning meat.

[–]TyPerfect 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This so much, my wife thought I was crazy for getting a gym membership. But now I have some visible gains and am starting to lose weight. Affection has been a lot more forthcoming, to the point where she will come into my study and just sit on the floor(No extra chairs in the work zone) just to talk to me.

[–]CQC3 30 points31 points  (8 children)

No kidding. I once overheard someone making fun of people who are extremely in shape. They said something like "What do you even need all that muscle for these days, it's not like you're out there in the wilderness trying to survive"

People say dumb shit all the time, the best thing any passionate, idealistic young man can do is understand that it's not their job to convince others of anything that they can't begin to help themselves with first.

Meditation has also helped me with this, when you begin to separate your awareness from your mind, and both of those from your body. You really begin to understand the utility of each--specifically that your body is your vessel in which you interact with this world. If your livelihood required you to drive large distances every day would you take care of your car?

[–]rpscrote 19 points20 points  (0 children)

I love it because sad sacks of shit like that are my competition in life. Too easy

[–]Glenbert 2 points3 points  (2 children)

"What do you even need all that muscle for these days, it's not like you're out there in the wilderness trying to survive"

Lol @ millenials. Lemme tell you, during the second recession that you experience as an adult, survival skills start to seem a lot less ridiculous.

[–]Goodyjoel 2 points3 points  (1 child)

You can call out millenials all you want on that, personally I am disgusted with my generation for exactly that reason. I'm continually guiding my circle to stay fit and learn to protect themselves

[–]Nicholas_ 2 points3 points  (1 child)

It's mostly the fat hoes who say that if you ever notice.

[–]thredditsowaway 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, very much agree. There's absolutely nothing you can do to change their minds. And you gain absolutely nothing from doing so. Hell, even girls who shame fit men are secretly 'mirin half the time.

Edit: I should mention that, in my teens, I used to be "that guy." I truly believed that musclularity was savage and irrelevant, and that intellect is the new sexy. Can you guess when I lost my v-card? Hint: it wasn't my teens.

[–][deleted] 30 points30 points

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[–]Nicholas_ 10 points11 points  (2 children)

Best type of gym.

I'm originally from N.I and im back from university and this is the gym I use on the regular.


Oldskool no nonsense powerlifter gym with a strongman yard out front. It's a little gem in a place where there practically is nothing.

[–]Goodyjoel 1 point2 points  (1 child)

The gem of my area has 4 power racks and 8 barbells and an extensive set of metric rubber plates in one room and is frequented by all of the wannabe bodybuilders in my area. Place is expensive, but oh so worth it. Been going a little over a month now and I am feeling on top of the world. Not even visually making gains yet, but I'm just starting out so I am making strength gains hella quick.

[–]Nicholas_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's basically what mine has haha (no joke). Except not only do we have about 1000kg worth of rubber weights, but about 500kg's worth of iron plates as well.

I swear, I never really appreciated a gym like it until I moved away to uni and realized just how bad most commercial gyms are :/

[–]thredditsowaway 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Damn, I wish I could afford that kind of gym.

Honestly, getting swole is half of "having good style." Having a good body shape and buying a $10 plain t-shirt that fits your body well looks way better than being scrawny and wearing a $40 dress shirt.

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points

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[–]thredditsowaway 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Where I live, most gyms cost $50 or more per month. I found one that costs less than half of that amount and I really need to save the money right now

When I have more money though I'd rather join your kind of gym than a franchise gym.

[–][deleted] 26 points27 points  (9 children)

yep, plenty of single ladies running around in uggs and sweatpants looookin rough


[–]IoSonCalaf 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Uggs are so appropriately named.

[–]Endorsed ContributorTheRedPilsner 7 points8 points  (1 child)

There should be a law against hambeasts wearing sweatpants that have things like "juicy" or "sexy" or "angel" printed across the butt.

[–]2 Senior Endorsed Contributorvengefully_yours 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There is, and it's in most of us.

[–]nothere_ 13 points14 points  (4 children)

They look like they smell of sweat and coffee

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points  (3 children)

BO, cat urine, and failure is the image I get from them. Fur lined boots with no sock, in the summer. Yeah sexy. :

[–]alanthemanofchicago 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I don't get how they can wear those in the summer. I wore my fleece-lined house shoes and walked to the end of my driveway (like 300 feet) to get my newspaper/mail on a Saturday, and by the time I'd gotten back, my feet were sweaty.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Because they are disgusting people?

[–]smokeybehr 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The local "uniform" is the triple-layered cami/t-shirt, denim shorts, and Uggs. They might swap out the t-shirt for a western shirt (open, of course) or the shorts for a skirt, but yet, the Uggs remain.

Yes, Uggs are comfy, but they're not meant to be worn all the time.

[–]tuxedoburrito 9 points10 points  (8 children)

I'm meeting someone for lunch from tinder. Some cute girl she said she was dressing casual and not to Overdress her.

My response?

"Don't fucking wear sweatpants."

She seems really cool, so we shall see how it goes. I'm still going to dress normal (I dress well, not business casual but pretty nice)

[–]ryno55 -3 points-2 points  (7 children)

You could leave out the profanity though. Personally, I use the F bomb too much too. It doesn't really add anything and makes you sound vulgar, if not angry.

[–]tuxedoburrito 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I think it has a time and a place. At work, at the gym, in professional or family settings i taper my tongue back really far.

In casual dating or hanging with friends I usually you cuss words. I mean, I want to at least show an once of verisimilitude rather than be completely PG. it depends on your culture as well. I'm in Portland, where its common place to cuss like a sailor. It's apart of the culture.

Vulgar just means common or lowly. Really it's all a matter of perspective. I could use an extensive vernacular but then I'd sound pretentious, there isn't a win win.

She laughed and said she'd keep a note of that. I just got back from lunch, she actually paid for it while I was keeping an eye on my dog outside (little did I know), pretty balling move for a gal. It went well.

[–]NidStyles -1 points0 points  (5 children)

No one gives a shit. They are just fucking words.

[–]Kingspot 0 points1 point  (4 children)

People do give a shit. you cannot deny that.

One effect that I like is that when you don't cuss often, when you do, people know you mean fucking business. The same with raising your voice. My mom didn't cuss too much didn't cuss too little but I knew if she ever said the F word, shit was about to seriously go down. Heard her say it maybe 3 times in my life.

[–]NidStyles 0 points1 point  (3 children)

No, you give and women give a shit.

[–]Kingspot 1 point2 points  (2 children)

You are a fool. Thats like saying that nobody cares about the language you use in general. What if a president used swearing in a speech or a debate? He would look uncouth, vulgar, and uneducated. If you want to be presentable, you dont speak with slang or swear words.

I swear and use slang pretty much constantly when with friends. But when you go to work, or you are meeting new people, you clean your shit up. If you deny this, ill put money on it that you haven't graduated high school yet.

[–]zaiguy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

100%. In Moscow women don't even go to the corner store without finding the right outfit, doing their hair and makeup, etc. It's would seem annoying but every trip outdoors is a nice treat for the eyes.

[–]suloco 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am guilty of the other extreme (working on it):

Walking a dog? Blazer, smart jeans, casual oxfords. Going to a pub? Nice shirt, knitted tie, slim chinos. Goddamn I change three times before I even leave the house. It's all ties, pocket squares and matching socks. Need to tone it down a bit.

But living in Prague, I weep seeing our lazy Czech 'style' every time I board a damn bus. Gotta fight that shit!

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Even if I'm going to Home Depot, as long as I'm not picking up something that will get me dirty loading it up, I'm in a decent shirt. Not something that would be worn to the club, but I'm not going in a ragged shirt and pants either.

[–]tuxedoburrito 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I was even doing yard work recently at a friends and barefoot.

They asked me if I had some throw away sneakers that I forgot or like, why I was wearing running shorts. I don't even own trashy clothes anymore. If it isn't worth wearing then get rid of it. Don't horde, that's what women do.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think it might be due to herd mentality. Most people aren't fit so they must shame those who are fit to make themselves feel better but secretly they are mirin'.

I recently started bulking seriously and my ex would give me a lot of shit for it in public but the other day I was changing and she barges into my room and the first thing she says is "wow, your arms are huge" as she felt them up. Same thing with my flatmates.

[–]Linrraba 26 points27 points  (12 children)

For years, I thought the whole point of marrying was letting yourself go. You know, not having to worry about impressing women, seducing and so on. Most people are raised that way.

[–]The_BeardedGentleman 23 points24 points  (8 children)

Well, for women with BB it is. For men who like their bank account its a different story.

[–]Linrraba 8 points9 points  (7 children)

I know. Marriage is a cake walk to women. But not so long ago setting down was a glorified thing for men too.

[–]Captain_Unremarkable 15 points16 points  (6 children)

A wedding is the Super Bowl for a women, only better.

[–]tuxedoburrito 16 points17 points  (3 children)

I'm a bartender at a wedding venue.

Can confirm holy shit bridezillas

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points

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[–]tuxedoburrito 4 points5 points  (0 children)

No. They're the same anywhere man. AWALT.

There have been definitely some drunk bridesmaids and brides, usually the groomsmen sweep in on them. Although I went to a wedding a few months ago as a guest and, yeah bridesmaid and I danced and drank and I stayed the night at her place. Which was fun.

But it's usually a bridesmaid, and either you're a groomsmen or really close to the groom. Then chances are (especially if it's open bar) you'll be good. Just be charming and genuine, crying during ceremony helps a bit too.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Its a Super Bowl you cant lose, and it goes on for ten - twenty years. Even if youre 300 lb and never threw a football in your life. You cant lose.

[–]CQC3 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That makes sense, nowadays many women probably get to experience both annually.

[–]CQC3 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I think it's more correct to assume that by "letting go", people really think marriage is the end of the game, that you can stop playing. Not necessarily letting yourself go physically (which does happen anyways because people get complacent thinking "this is it")


Always keep yourself in shape, if you live long enough you'll thank yourself. I've seen a lot of old timers, a lot of em are all fucked up and can't even tie their shoes without running out of breath (more women than men I should add). Those old folks that were still quick and spry, I have a lot of respect for those guys. You can even see the difference in their eyes, there is a vitality to them that the weaker ones don't have. It's like they live on two different planes of existence.

Stay in shape fuckers.

[–]el_superbeastooo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I too used to think that and even was happy of that "fact". Like "who am I trying to impress?" Ugh.

Turned it around and am in the best shape of my life and continuing to improve. Fuck that shit.

[–]BlackHeart89 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thats crazy. As a child, growing up, I always wanted to be the perfect man for my wife. This included having a nice physique. My reasoning? I didn't want her to desire anything I couldn't give her.

[–]Rougepellet 1 point2 points  (3 children)

Unbelievable. So if a man who is out of shape and married suddenly decides to start going to the gym to get back that body he used to have and improve his health, it's a sign he might be cheating? How does this logic even function in society? Explains the decline.

[–]Endorsed ContributorTheRedPilsner 6 points7 points  (2 children)

A while back on the Fitness subreddit, I saw a thread where a formerly overweight guy started going to the gym and eating healthy. After a few months he had lost a lot of fat and had gained a lot of muscle. All of his friends and coworkers took notice of how much better he looked. His wife (who was also overweight) got super paranoid that he was going to leave her for a "skinny girl" and even went as far as to say that she wanted him to stop going to the gym.

If a married man decides he wants to get in shape, lazy out-of-shape people will assume that he's either cheating or planning to cheat. Because why would anybody want to work out unless it was to attract a new partner?

[–]ITranscendRaceHombre 6 points7 points  (0 children)

God fucking forbid she is inspired by his dedication and progress and betters herself. No. She has to try and bring him back down to her horribly mundane, loser level.

[–]Smooovies 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well, she spent all that time domesticating him, so she didn't want all her hard work going to waste.

[–]truchisoft 6 points7 points  (15 children)

No, but the article is spot on, any married guy who suddenly changes like that, and is not particulary driven to keep the marriage is doing it because he is cheating, I know lots of cases like this.

If you never let yourself go, this article is useless, if you always go out with friends then going out with friends is nothing to worry about, but if you change your netflix weekends for "fishing trips" with friends you never used to frecuent before, it is a red flag.

[–]_eskimo_brothers_ 38 points39 points  (7 children)

Or ya know, the AFC woke up and is bettering himself, not being a selfless shell of a man anymore. He's practicing self love, because he's not getting affection or charm anymore.

Obviously it's rare for BP men to internalize these things without the RP, but it does happen. OP is spot on, might not always be cheating, if you want a successful LTR of any kind you have to understand and use dread.

[–]Shadow_banned1 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Exactly this. Ex-wife actually started following me to the gym because she thought I was cheating. Nope, just loving myself because you won't.

[–]2wiseclockcounter 1 point2 points  (5 children)

sorry to piggy back, but does AFC stand for alpha fucks cuck or something? never saw it in the glossary.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (2 children)

It should be in there. It stands for Average Frustrated Chump. AFC's are a joke. They hate on guys that are good at getting women or anyone that is better than them at something when they could spend that energy trying to better themselves. In the "hating on guys who get women" example, they'll call the successful guys douche bags or assholes.

Edit: Just checked it. It's not in there.

[–]_eskimo_brothers_ 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Correct, Rollo is basically required reading. AFC (Average Frustrated Chump) comes up in his Rational Male book very early. I would recommend reading it /u/wiseclockcounter. Or as linked below start reading the website, since much of the book are articles from the site.

By the way... /u/SecondThreat are you referencing:

  • OP,

  • article writer for dailymail (Bianca London for MailOnline... ha doubt it's her real name)

  • person I replied to,

  • or myself?

I didn't quite follow brother, I assume you meant guy I replied to? I didn't check his history.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I was replying to /u/wiseclockcounter. When I said "This guy..." I was describing what an AFC is, I wasn't referring to one particular user.

Edit: I edited my previous post to make it clearer.

[–]BadassRPMofo 8 points9 points  (3 children)

That's the point. There's no better way to instill dread than doing exactly that. This particularly applies to those who are beta slipping in a LTR. It doesn't have a be a drastic wholesale change, because even the slightest changes in behavior (soft dread) are picked up immediately.

[–]truchisoft -1 points0 points  (2 children)

We are discussing two different points.

I argue there is truth in the article, any male that suddenly starts doing everything in the article is almost certainly cheating or will cheat/leave his girl.

[–]yummybits 7 points8 points  (1 child)

any male that suddenly starts doing everything in the article is almost certainly cheating or will cheat/leave his girl.

any male that suddenly starts doing everything in the article is almost certainly cheating or will cheat/leave his girl or knows how to play the game


[–]truchisoft -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Rarely, you never go full alpha at once

[–]Glenbert -2 points-1 points  (2 children)

No, but the article is spot on, any married guy who suddenly changes like that, and is not particulary driven to keep the marriage is doing it because he is cheating, I know lots of cases like this.

Only if the guy's a total fucking loser who actually believes that his paramour is his twue wuv.

If some slutty intern is what prompts you to finally go to the gym, you are a fucking loser.

[–]truchisoft -2 points-1 points  (1 child)

So? What does that have to do with the magazine's point?

[–]SilentAlpha 0 points1 point  (1 child)

When people don't respect something anymore, they treat it horribly. Lack of respect for marriage often comes with people who neglect it. Interestingly, a lot of the serious Christian couples I know who strongly value marriage stay fit and keep it interesting with dates, fun, etc. It's always the 'wild' ones who get married and then slack off and wonder why they aren't happy anymore.

When you spend your single years trying to bang anything that moves because you think marriage is the end...what do you expect?

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They expect "Happily Ever After" not realizing that is the end of the story.

[–]Windrammer420 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How is that what you take from this? They're saying if someone began doing that and didn't have a habit of it before, it's suspicious. If they'd been doing it the whole time it wouldn't be. Simple stuff.

[–]87GNX 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Heartiste had an old clip of a song admonishing this... it was from the 60s

[–]HeadingRed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The implication that married people are supposed to let themselves go is incredibly depressing.

As marriage is currently mostly a women's benefit having a man who becomes less attractive to other women increases her feelings of security. Having been in 4 live-in LTR's I can also tell you all of them get jealous of anything that you enjoy without them- hence the apprehension and fear around any new hobbiesfriendsinterests.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is the result of that dog-shit softness society tries to impose on you. The "good enough" attitude.

I will never stop working toward achieving a stealer physique and physical endurance. It's good for you, you look more attractive, your mind is clear from the meditative state of exercise, and it builds a sense of spirituality (for me at least).

Take what's gained from spending your time on exercise and compare it to "sitting on the couch and eating chips watching TV", what's gained there? A couple hundred calories of un-nutritious garbage and 30 minutes of bliss in la-la land before the commercial break where you take a nice look at your gut right after some miracle diet pill commercial.

[–]coffee_and_lumber -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I got married and doubled down on the self-improvement and dread game and got the fuck out of the house right from the get-go. This was even before swallowing the pill. I've generally noticed that the couples I see in my middle class inner city neighborhood are very fit and active and the ones out in the small surrounding towns are a fucking disaster...25 year olds who look like middle forties. Bad middle 40's.

[–]Sember 80 points80 points [recovered]

"Woman changes man into someone she is no longer interested in."

I think many women do this and it leads to skewed world views, once a man decides to be himself and do good for himself, he's cheating, who the fuck knows if a man is cheating cause he's going on fishing trips all of a sudden, or started taking care of himself, maybe he wasn't happy with his life and is trying to get his shit together.

[–]TRP Vanguard: "Dark Triad Expert"IllimitableMan 96 points97 points  (21 children)

We call it betafication; when your girl tries to bitch you up because she's insecure she'll lose you at your current value. Then when she sabotages you, she doesn't want you for herself anymore either. It's a glitch in hypergamy.

[–]Sember 5 points5 points [recovered]

Is it rooted in insecurities or is there something else to it? Could be norms and culture. Imagine the Spartan society where men had to be Alpha, would a woman even want to make that man a Beta? Would she maybe even try to straighten him out and remove some beta traits he might have even though he's Alpha (most Spartans probably were)?

[–]Endorsed ContributorRedPillDad 25 points26 points  (11 children)

A woman has a hierarchy of emotional needs and she continually seeks to be in a state of emotional well-being.

Pain takes precedence over pleasure. But living in a world of relative comfort, she'll focus upon less pressing needs, such as anything that makes her feel insecure.

An Alpha mate makes her feel secure physically, but not emotionally. She feels competition anxiety (dread) - that other women will poach him. So consciously or not, she begins taming and softening her man.

Betafication is the easy life. It's a tempting path, like Cypher plugging back in to the Matrix. But it can have severe consequences.

It's a losing move for her as well. The less Alpha he becomes, the more she steps up to take control. But having more control is a double-edged sword for her; it gives her some measure of security but increases her level of anxiety. The other fallout being her complete lack of desire for him, leading to a dead bedroom and divorce.

[–]StManTiS 12 points13 points  (9 children)

You know its funny, last week I was at a birthday party for a family friend. She's been married 22 years now and has 3 kids with a big spread. She said something that made me choke in the middle of a conversation.

Somehow the topic got onto LTRs and she said the most important thing for a woman to feel in a relationship is that she can hand things off to her man. From her point of view a woman wants to do everything and that is why she is always so crazy trying to do just that. But if she can find a man that is in her eyes reliable then she can relax and delegate.

What's more is that there is a 14 year gap between their first child and their last two. She says during that time she got a job because she was planning to leave her man and wanted independence, but then he stepped up in some intangible way and all of a sudden more kids.

I'm not really sure how to frame this anecdote in context but it seems to me that by Betafying a man a woman inherently makes him unreliable and thus causes herself to go more crazy.

[–]Endorsed ContributorRedPillDad 22 points23 points  (2 children)

But if she can find a man that is in her eyes reliable then she can relax and delegate.

She almost said it, but not quite... She doesn't want a reliable man-servant. What she (and everyone else) wants is the RELIEF a worthy leader brings - the trustworthy person who can take the burden of making decisions off her shoulders.

But if she's been feminist-trained, she'll resist taking on the role of first mate. She wants power over him. And it's easy for a guy to let that happen because he's happy to benefit from a leader's relief.

"So you want to hold the reigns, babe? Great! Here you go..."

If he casually allows that to happen, they'll both lose in the end.

[–][deleted] 22 points23 points  (1 child)

The quickest way to destroy a woman is give her everything she wants. Just look at the US. Women have never had more than they have now, in the history of the world. And they are miserable. Mental health issues are off the charts. And of course this brings society down with them. Its all part of the plan.

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor 5 points6 points  (0 children)

it seems to me that by Betafying a man a woman inherently makes him unreliable and thus causes herself to go more crazy.

Women have several behaviors just like this but I would say it is not necessarily crazy but rather they just DESPISE their men. Their behavior appear batshit crazy but it is really about hating on the men they are with. Women try to pussify their men and then despise them. They try to cut off or limit sex and then despise the men who let them. They try to manipulate you into doing something or not doing something and then lose sexual attraction- because they despise the men who let them get their way.

Does anybody notice a pattern?

[–]rpscrote 1 point2 points  (3 children)

but then he stepped up in some intangible way and all of a sudden more kids.

More like Chad T. stepped up and all of a sudden more kids

[–]StManTiS 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Well its too early for the girl but his son is a dead ringer for him. He just got a better job, got rid of the beer gut and started getting into a bunch of his hobbies. Pretty TRP stuff for a married man.

[–]rpscrote 3 points4 points  (0 children)

refreshing to hear another man stepping up

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, it's pretty clear that this is the case. I wanted to believe it wasn't but AWALT.

[–]RedPillscientist 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"that by Betafying a man a woman inherently makes him unreliable and thus causes herself to go more crazy."

This. Basically shit-testing/fitness testing to see if he really is the man she can look up to. When he fails shit tests, she literally gets frustrated, realizing she has to keep looking for another Man and start all over. I see that akin to us men thinking we found a HB9 unicorn, only for her to become complacent and gain 200 pounds.

[–]1RPAlternate42 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The solution for her is that she acts in a feminine and submissive way so that while her mate may be more alpha and a flight risk, she is always working in a way to make sure that all other female options are disappointing to him.

Alas, most women think they can have their alpha man and he will just stick around because princess entitlement.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

In those days, there was no desk job (or very few equivalents) for the man to run off to and sit for eight hours a day and still be able to pay the mortgage and grocery bills. Being physically capable of survival was just a given (assuming the men were surviving).

[–]Endorsed ContributorMarsupian 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A women will always test a man. If a guy turns beta because some girl bitches at him how alpha is he really?

Its part insecurity and part hoping he ignores her and carves out his own way in the world and takes her with him despite the bitching.

[–]darkwolfx24678 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's a good point. In that case, I believe it was culturally recognized that men were alpha and any attempts to restrict that were probably looked down upon.

[–]suloco 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Seems to me like a huge shit test. Anyone who bends is weak and goes outta window. The men women cannot change are the ones they stick to.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Woman is attracted to AF, but also wants her BB. She relentlessly tries to get her AF to commit and provide, without being aware that the more he complies, the more he turns into the type of man she's is not attracted to. I don't think it's a glitch, it's just optimized female sexual strategy, not optimized couple life

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

wouldn't call it a glitch. if you fall for it as a man, you've failed the shit test.

[–]BattleDrillOneAlpha 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Makes me realize the difference between men and women when it comes to cheating.

I don't think I have ever heard a story of a man rationalizing his cheating. As in when a man cheats he cheats. He doesn't bull shit the girl, say that "emotions" caused him to cheat, doesn't "take breaks", doesn't have a fight and then go bang the ex, etc. The dude may string the girl along just like a woman does, but when a man is caught he kind of just lets it ride.

He knows that the jig is up; there is no need to bull shit the cheating away like a woman does.

Reminds me of those threads on Reddit where the chicks rationalize cheating on their "asshole" and "controlling" boyfriends, but they never use the word "cheating".

[–]bitches_be_crazy86 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's what women do all the time. They try to change you into something. Something that, in the end they don't like. Not sure if that's a deliberate shit test or just lack of forsight and objectivity so typical of women.

[–]Endorsed Contributormonsieurhire2 66 points67 points  (5 children)

So . . . if you work to stay healthy, keep yourself presentable, have a life outside of your relationship, have a career, and treat your SO nice but without pedestalizing her, all of which are normal healthy behaviors that make one desirable, you're a no-good CHEATER?!?!?


Articles likes this are completely disingenuous.

There will be another one a few days later that says you should dump a guy for exhibiting the OPPOSITE behaviors.

It would go like this:

12 Signs you should dump your SO:

  1. He doesn't exercise.
  2. He makes you the center of his universe and "smothers you!"
  3. He doesn't do nice things for you!
  4. He does too many nice things for you!
  5. He has no friends!
  6. He's not "ambitious!"

. . . .

Therefore, dump him!

The whole point is to confuse the shit out of women and demoralize them.

[–]Glenbert 20 points21 points  (0 children)

12 Signs you should dump your SO: He doesn't exercise. He makes you the center of his universe and "smothers you!" He doesn't do nice things for you! He does too many nice things for you! He has no friends! He's not "ambitious!" . . . .

This was me in a previous relationship. She ended up cheating on me. Shocker!

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Erm, meet our friend the female hamster

[–]rpscrote 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Right along the cosmo article: 12 Ways to Spice Up Your Sex Life, 11 of those ways being put food on his dong in some fashion.

[–]trpdownunder 1 point2 points  (0 children)

extra points if it's spicy food right?!

[–]PedroIsWatching 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The whole point is to confuse the shit out of women and demoralize them.

And keep them subscribed to Cosmo.

[–]1independentmale 26 points27 points  (4 children)

Great submission and analysis. When I was married, a friend of mine setup a small home gym and started doing p90x. He was talking about it constantly and I found it intriguing, so I did a couple of workouts with him. Loved it, picked myself up some weights and the DVDs and started it myself.

Ex wife's hamster went wild with accusations of cheating. "I'm supposed to believe that out of nowhere you want to lift weights?!" Crazy fucking bitch.

Dread the shit out of them. Once she's convinced you're hers forever, all interest in you will be lost.

[–]Senior Contributordr_warlock 22 points23 points  (3 children)

That's because she's projecting. This is what women do when they plan on branch swinging in the near future; get fit and get new apparel. Once they've reached their goal, time to say "we need to talk". The next day shes straddling chad's cock because she always has back up plans in her phone or on social media.

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

The next day? By the time you get the talk shes already been test driving for the last month. Cant risk swinging to a bad branch. Shes pre vetted by that point. And thats why the only response to a 'we need to talk' is to preempt the break up.

[–]Smooovies 0 points1 point  (1 child)

So, does that imply that men's expectation of women's behavior, in a blue pill sense, of them being faithful, loyal, compassionate, etc., is a projection from us?

[–]Senior Contributordr_warlock 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Projection doesnt tend to be a man's problem, pedestaling is.


Men are the prize, but it is women who think they're the prize. Lots of foolish men agree.

Woman is the prize that crumbles when you understand her. She can only be a prize while you pedestalise her.

Your mental abstraction of a woman is greater than who she really is. This is why a drop of hate can be useful, it redresses the innate inclination men have to romanticise women.


[–]borderline_sociopath 36 points37 points  (3 children)

Are they suddenly being overly nice? Allowing you to watch whatever you want on TV, buying you gifts, asking if you would like to go out to your favourite restaurant.

Maybe the opposite is true and they are constantly picking fault with you or accusing you of cheating.

What brilliant logic. "If he's doing this, he's cheating. If he's doing the opposite, he's cheating. Ya, totes cheating. I can't even."

[–]rpscrote 14 points15 points  (1 child)

it boils down to "if it makes me feel bad he's cheating"

[–]vox_veritas 6 points7 points  (0 children)

This is exactly it. If it doesn't fit into what I expect, or makes me feel bad, or is confusing, he's cheating.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Lol at feminist vocabulary, Getting a reccomended hour of daily physical activity in a culture where obesity and being sedentary are an epidemic = "Infatuation with lifting weights"

[–]GainzdalfTheWhey 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Wow this article is so bad that its good. It's textbook female crazy in mainstream.

[–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (9 children)

Women subconsciously grease up their man once in a relationship so he doesn't have better options than to stay with her...

This article confirms TRP.

[–]Squeezymypenisy 14 points15 points  (0 children)

The extreme version of that was that dadbod craze.

[–]MoneyStatusLooks 7 points7 points [recovered]

My ex did this. Was always making me fatty homemade food or wanted to stay in and get pizza. Didn't realise what was happening until I found TRP.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (2 children)

baking is another tool in their arsenal..mmhh brownies

[–]rpscrote 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Pre empt bitches, lift prior to hanging out. Eat brownie. Receive gains. All is well in the world.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

haha lift as you eat her wet brownie, watch her eyes lust over, then bang away

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (3 children)

Stay with her until she gets a better option. Then she branch swings away. No shame to her, its all about the resources.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (2 children)

Yeah exactly. Nevermind she leaves the man brokenhearted after that...or the kids too (if she has kids with him) yeah nevermind that. Suicide? Not her problem. Broke and living in the ghetto? Not her problem. And what does she bring to society that requires all these men to sacrifice their life's work? Is she curing cancer? Is she a messiah? Does she help these men achieving greatness? NO.

We have too many females in need of support and the Gov. knows they are the biggest tax base because they spend like crazy. That's why the Gov. keeps propping up these vagina lemmings. It's a house of cards and one day it will fall hard like the world trade centers.

[–]NabroleonBonaparte 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But why should she give more if she HAS A VAGINA?!?!?!

Jokes aside, of course they won't care when they're ex is struggling, broke, suicidal, etc because it validates her decision that she left a beta.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Interesting post. You hit many of my main talking points. You only left out nazis. A-.

[–]Elodrian 17 points18 points  (9 children)

  1. Your intuition is screaming at you that he’s having an affair. You may not be able to substantiate what your intuition is saying, but that doesn’t stop it being true. Your intuition doesn’t have an agenda. It doesn’t want you to hold onto this man at all costs. It just tells you the truth that it picks up from a thousand subtle clues.

How do you tell the difference between women's intuition and borderline personality disorder? That sounds like the set-up to a joke, but there is no punch line.

[–]cuban 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The punch line is when she hit me in the face for "cheating." Oh, yeah, guess who was cheating.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Would it be similar to trusting your gut?

[–]1rporion -1 points0 points  (5 children)

Yeah well, you underestimate women at your own peril.

They read non verbal cues up to ten times better than you, in fact, they take in so much that they dont analyze it directly but they have feeelings.....

Thats why they are into esoteric shit so much, because thats what the world feeeeels like to them, listen to them talk about sexual chemistry, "there is tension in the air", "energies flow"......

If that system had not worked well for them in the past it no longer would be there so you better believe in female intuition and fast.

[–]DannyDemotta 0 points1 point  (2 children)

1) That's dumb as shit. All of it. All of the above.

2) "your own peril", Fucking WHY? If you're married, your Wife can divorce you for any reason she wants - up to and including believing you're cheating, whether or not you are. She can divorce you for not letting her watch her TV show when she wants. -- If you're not married - who the flying fuck cares what a woman is intuiting?

Is this you being an edgelord or something? I don't get it. What peril? The peril of replacing a dumb ass, illogical biatch with another who isn't going to be a fucking weirdo who isn't able to complete the adult human task of vocalizing her thoughts in a comprehensible manner? Sounds incredibly difficult.

[–]1rporion 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Well, you wanted to know what the difference was, and the difference is that between a real strenght that women have and someone who is batshit insane.

Plus, a woman who is firmly on your side and is wise enough to go for symbiotic relationship instead of a parasitic one can be an invaluable asset.

[–]DannyDemotta 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yet none of what you said explains your disregard for OP saying

How do you tell the difference between women's intuition and borderline personality disorder?

Because for the vast majority of (date-able) women, the lines are almost completely blurred. They've been so used to just straight-up bullshitting through their entire lives, and being white-knighted, and having endless favors/work done for them, that many would prefer to use what intelligence they have to further the charade, rather than to actually become an intellectual, interesting, personable human being.

To the extent you don't want monogamy/LTR - you can underestimate women all you want, with next to no consequences. Pursuing something deeper necessarily means abandoning some amount of logic/reason, and substituting it with faith/feelz. But that applies whether you're straight or gay. It's not something that Women, exclusively, are able to do against Men.

[–]Elodrian 0 points1 point  (1 child)

If women habitually arrive at conclusions based on intuition, and are unable to articulate the reasons or evidence for those decisions, how is anyone else supposed to refute those conclusions when they are wrong? There is a reason why enlightenment virtues place reason and evidence on a pedestal: it makes the decision making process transparent and amenable to review and analysis. It gets you to the right answer more reliably than intuition.

I don't discount the existence of female intuition. I believe that they believe in it. I also believe that it amounts to a coin toss at best and that there is no rational way of refuting the conclusions.

"She thinks you're cheating, therefore you're cheating" elevates feelings to the status of evidence. If this mode of reasoning is deemed acceptable by the general public, how does a person with Borderline Personality Disorder know that there was something wrong with them?

[–]1rporion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That is what I am trying to tell you, it does not amount to a coin toss.

You are conflating several things here, like flinging some shit to see if it will stick or genuinely having a gut feeling, or projecting her shitty character on others.

I have seen women size up situations in seconds that would go right over the heads of most men and it took me hours to see that they were indeed right.

Now, as to how you refute them , you react in a way that once again tells her, her gut feelings were indeed, wrong.

You cant argue with a womans emotions, you just can make her feel something else.

Laugh in her face because of the absurdity of her rage, then she might rage harder, then she might cry, then you fuck her good, then she might cry some more, or not, then she sleeps like a baby.

If you are fucking her, that is your job.

And yes, I know...

[–]Manuel_S 15 points16 points  (1 child)

Good stuff.

Just a comment, everybody:





When you start to implement things, do a smooth transition. Softly. If you do it well, she'll be at the same time kicking herself for suspecting you because there's no reason, and utterly convinced you got a harem of nubile young women.

[–]Buckeye1234 14 points14 points [recovered]

so if I improve, I am cheating, lol

[–]dabrah1 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Most of the "signs hes cheating" articles are so vague that they can apply to almost any boyfriend or husband, in any relationship. This is clearly done intentionally to get women curious enough to read more/ similar articles- not to mention it keeps them in a constant state of dread.

[–]Xuixien_TheEpic 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I've read a lot of these "signs he's cheating" articles and the only thing they share as commonality is that everything is a sign he's cheating. It's like women just collectively arm themselves with material to start fights.

[–]Tom_The_Human 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Who is least invested holds the power. Always be less invested. Everything listed above will increase her investment in you. So if you are actually really interested in a chick, you better make sure you have this applied or it will go down in flames.

Whenever you think "I really like/love this girl! Maybe I can soften up the TRP..." remember: it is because you act how you do and are how you are that provides the conditions for her to be how she is and act how she acts.

[–]TheQuestion78 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Who is least invested holds the power. Always be less invested. Everything listed above will increase her investment in you. So if you are actually really interested in a chick, you better make sure you have this applied or it will go down in flames.

And this is why self-improvement is always more important than gaining a woman's affection.

[–]FarfromaHero40 5 points6 points  (0 children)

"Who is least invested holds the power. Always be less invested. Everything listed above will increase her investment in you. So if you are actually really interested in a chick, you better make sure you have this applied or it will go down in flames."

  • Precisely. Maintain alpha aloofness as much as the situation will allow. Game is about you chasing your best self and her chasing you because of it.

[–]xcallide 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This is a bad article. It's describing what women do, not men, when they cheat. It's part of the distortion TRP is trying to clear up, but for women: in the same way that men shouldn't hold women to men's standards, women shouldn't hold men to women's standards. For example, when a man acts aloof, he's typically just spacing out or thinking about some math problem he read online. When a woman acts aloof, she's typically mad about something or wants something to happen, but won't say it. Because she knows the reasons why she acts aloof, she incorrectly assumes that those are the same reasons why men act aloof. In the same way, men incorrectly assume women's reasons to act aloof. I hold the idea that men are more built to solve problems than identify problems. Meanwhile, women are more built to identify problems than to solve problems. That's probably why the standards are different: if a man assumes a woman is just spacing out, he will have more time to work on a problem; similarly, if a woman assumes a man is mad, that makes it so that if the man is truly mad, the problem is correctly identified. Women err on the side of "more problems" when identifying problems. Therefore, in a society comprised of only men, we'd see really cool gadgets, but impractical ones -- gadgets that are interesting to fellow nerds, but useless to the consumer. In a society comprised of only women, we would see tons of attitudes being thrown around, since things aren't getting done, and women are less prone to taking problem-solving responsibilities. But the problems that do eventually get solved are relevant ones. Either way, both societies are inefficient. One of the steps to become Red Pill is to accept that women and men are different. The author of this article is unfortunately not.

[–]Moneyley 2 points3 points  (0 children)

"He's lifting weights"

Yea he is bitch what about you? What are YOU doing to improve your health?

[–]suloco 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This shit here is just women projecting. It is how THEY imagine YOU would behave if you were cheating whereas it's really tells you a lot about their behavior.

[–]ThreeLF 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"Note you don't do this by being abusive/being nasty, you do this by being the ultimate guy"

FUCKING THIS! Needs to be stickied everywhere over this entire sub. This information can be easy to misconstrue, as we've seen by a lot of outsiders.

[–]2RedPill4LYF 5 points6 points  (2 children)

A pattern begins to reveal itself to me as time goes on. All the mainstream rags print dating advice that is exactly counter to the reality of the trends of male behavior. These sources that women go to for dating advice are responsible for feeding them the bullshit that causes so many breakups and horrible relationship decisions.

[–]NOTprofessorbooty 4 points4 points [recovered]

To me, it's important to remember the bullshit women are fed daily from the time they are little girls from the machine. They are told to want the opposite of whatever they are born with. You have straight hair? Here's a curling iron to get those luxurious curls. Curly hair? Fuck that shit, here's a flattening iron. You blonde? Go red. Brunette? Go blonde. You a black woman with natural hair? Fuck that, get you some "good" hair we took from a horse. They are being bombarded with this shit, and I've not met a woman yet that can see it. They all just buy in.

[–]2RedPill4LYF -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

What should alarm you is just how much men still may not be fully aware of.

[–]Johnny10toes 2 points3 points  (5 children)

There are a couple of things that I am bad at in here. Things that are not me but a reprogramming over a long time. One I use to be a huge flirt. I have a hard time with the dial on that one. It's 11 or 0. I know it's a fear that if I turn it on I'll wind up cheating and need to start doing it again. But without going to 11.

The second thing is friends. I'm not incapable of making friends, I just don't take the time. The guys I use to run with back in the day wouldn't make good friends now, I'm in a different place. Some are still into drugs and shit like that.

So I'm not really bad at them as much as I am good at it but don't do it.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (1 child)

No friends = low SMV to women. No one to pre select you = she doesnt want you either.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Makes sense. Funny how the other way around is never an issue.

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points

[permanently deleted]

[–]Johnny10toes 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Mine is 20 years removed from flirt with all, which is a long time to program myself to just stay away heh.

[–][deleted] 4 points4 points

[permanently deleted]

[–]1RPAlternate42 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don't show my wife anything. I have nothing to hide, but I don't have anything to not show or even show, for that matter.

She shit/comfort-tested me once with a: "I'm completely transparent you know how to get into my phone and email. You hide things."

Yes. My phone is a virtual easter-egg hunt of pussy for you to find...

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Please put a summary at the top of the thread and follow the format instructions in the announcement:


Here's a good example of what we're looking for:


[–]slutnip 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Funny, same thing applies to women as well

Is this written by a woman? of course it is. You guys are missing the "deflection" here, I will tell you from lots of experience, women are the worst cheaters on the planet, most guys i know at least have a moral compass about it

[–]dw0r 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The 12 signs he's cheating of being a shitty GF/wife that most women ignore

[–]Endorsed Contributorvandaalen 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Good stuff. Archived for future referencing in asktrp.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Personally I "liked" the ending best:

11 - Are they suddenly being overly nice? Allowing you to watch whatever you want on TV, buying you gifts, asking if you would like to go out to your favourite restaurant. For some, having an affair can make them act happier in their life... or guilt can make them try to make it up to you subconsciously

12 - Maybe the opposite is true and they are constantly picking fault with you or accusing you of cheating. When attraction fades in a relationship and there’s something going on the side, it’s easy to get irritable. The added burden of deceit doesn’t help. Plus, once someone has successfully cheated undetected they start to think if they could do it why cant you.

File under Damned if you do, damned if you don't.

Honorable mention: 8. Your intuition is screaming at you that he’s having an affair. You may not be able to substantiate what your intuition is saying, but that doesn’t stop it being true. Your intuition doesn’t have an agenda. It doesn’t want you to hold onto this man at all costs. It just tells you the truth that it picks up from a thousand subtle clues.

Why be rational when the catch-all Female Intuition card can be played?

I strongly believe that it's incendiary articles like this that do a disservice to women first, and to their SO second. To be being part of TRP philosophy means being immune to this type of propaganda meant to rattle the cage in order to sell advertisement; I refrain from wasting time with people whose narrative follow these type of story telling.

[–]RPthrowaway123 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is basically a guide on what to do as a man if you think you're relationship in trouble. Spin little hamster, spin!

[–]Sir_Shitlord_focker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've said it before and I'll say it again: you do t need a phd in redpillology to fuck girls and over thinking it will ruin your game. Dread game is simply acting like you don't need her.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Well those are signs of cheating, which is the entire purpose of dread game - to make her jealous. If you are cheating on your wife, that is what you would be doing.

[–]VictorEremitaK -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You are not really honest in your critique.

All of a sudden, his working days are longer, maybe he even has to travel, so he’s away from you overnight, for a couple of days at a time, or even longer

He takes a lot more trouble (more than before) over his appearance, whether that means dressing better, a sudden heavy use of aftershave, or an infatuation with the gym and lifting weights.

They are talking about behaviour suddenly changing.

[–]thetenman -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Funny how a specific act and it's exact opposite are symptoms of the same problem. Hamstering at it's finest.

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