Men's RightsAustralian lawyer speaks out against "our family law system is very female-focused and, frankly, unbalanced." (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by [deleted]

An Australian law expert 'Michael Kilmartin' has felt the call to speak up about the unfair and bias proceedings happening everyday in Australian Family Court.


Specifically stating : "I have had countless male clients say they feel they are unfairly painted as the bad guy in every step of the separation or shared parenting process. They certainly feel there's a lack of balance in family law proceedings."

Michael says often the cause of the favouritism is:

"Mr Kilmartin said many male clients voiced the concern that they were always painted as the villain in divorce and parenting custody matters and women wanting to score easy points over their ex would cite violence or other intimidatory claims to win in court, with "the system" tending to side with them."

Yet another example of women using victimisation to win over the courts. At least this man has the balls to say something about it.

[–]X346 51 points52 points  (5 children)

What women really think of men:

http://sheddingoftheego.com/2015/08/01/ ... -feminism/

This comment was posted by an "anti-feminist" woman:

"I hate to admit it but most of the younger woman here - including myself do not feel much empathy or compassion for men. Instead, we generally use men as a mirror to reflect our own vanity. And often we provoke their desires in cruel and capricious ways, simply for our own self gratification. Only our children can inspire a true feeling of love within us – at least if we have normal maternal affections.

In reality, our primary interest in men is obtaining a life of comfort and security – both for ourselves and our children – which is why we still value marriage.And since younger men are becoming increasingly reluctant to marry, many of us are proclaiming to be antifeminists to help assuage their fears end secure a long-term commitment.

Fortunately for women men’s sense of chivalry is still strong. Men are still eager to believe that women have a caring and unselfish nature. So by feigning compassion for men, we are likely to find a husband with good financial prospects, a husband whom we can always divorce if we become dissatisfied, while continuing to enjoy an affluent lifestyle.

That I’m afraid is the real nature of women. Perhaps this page should be renamed “The myth of female beneficience”. And yet, even though I am revealing our inner motivations, most men will despise me because they prefer a beautiful lie to a painful truth. However, in spite of my selfish instincts, I have spoken the truth, fully aware that you shall only heap derision upon me."

[–]3savoryprunes 37 points38 points  (3 children)

I suspect this was written by a man.

[–]X346 -5 points-4 points  (1 child)

@savoryprunes: Why would it be written by a man? That doesn't make any sense.

Are you a woman?

[–]3savoryprunes 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I suspect it was written by a man because it is lacking in feelz or any appeals to the feelz of its intended audience. It is both rational and succinct. In fact, It mirrors RP theory so clearly that I suspect it was an RP troll who posted it.

I'm not at all saying that it's a bad thing. We see these types of troll posts frequently. Usually, it's the replies to such posts that contain gems that support our ideas.

Read it again out loud. Does it not have a masculine tone and structure? Even @girlsayswhat sounds more feminine than this. If it is a woman who wrote this, then she is shockingly masculine.

Also, "savoryprunes" = "taste my testes". Look through my post history. It should be obvious that I'm a man.

[–]Limekill 37 points38 points  (3 children)

Actually Judges themselves have criticised the laws (http://www.familylawexpress.com.au/family-law-news/children/childabuse/falseallegations-childabuse/false-abuse-claims-are-the-new-court-weapon-retiring-judge-says/1762)

I don't think the Federal Government will change the law because "Australia PM is a misogynist" thing.

Also its male rights so no one (in the media) really cares.

As for whether its a PR stunt, I personally doubt it - most good family lawyers make good bank anyway (and so don't really care) and a lot of ->practising<- lawyers don't really want to have a huge number of cases (I know one barrister who will only ever have a maximum of 5 cases on at anyone time).

[–][deleted] 25 points26 points  (12 children)

fun fact, australia has an enormously high suicide rate for men

[–]Evolved_Red 8 points9 points  (5 children)

Ironically, despite an (extremely incompetent) government that made sexist remarks to its first ever female prime minister, Australia is one of the most feminist countries on the world.

But I've said this here before: despite all the chest thumping males do here, women rule the roost.

The thing is, Aussie men let them behave this way.

Aussie men especially in Sydney, let women behave like absolute cunts, let them enable their childish attitudes, with no repercussions at all. Female entitlement is through the roof here, and furthered not only socially, but in the media and especially in our justice system, as per the OP.

This place is really a shithole.

ROK put up an article about this a while ago here.

[–]Sinther 3 points4 points  (3 children)

Can confirm. Originally from Sydney. The game is extremely difficult. I used to travel outside of Sydney for fun...

Now in Brisbane. Game is easier, cost of living WAY cheaper, and the girls here are actually of a higher quality.

[–]Evolved_Red 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Qld girls, especially country girls, are definitely of higher stock. It's funny how they were more open minded that these 'city' Sydney women. Solipsism is a hell of a drug. My best time was when i lived in the Gold Coast. Beautiful women there.

I'm a frequent overseas liver / traveller also. Spent last year living in LA. Tell you what, guys from the USA often complain about their women so expected the worst, but I found complete opposite - they were warm and inviting, easily approachable - especially in comparison to these Arctic Sydney women

[–]marlybarrow 1 point2 points  (1 child)

It's probably because of the accent, apparently the Americans have a thing for Australian accents.

[–]Evolved_Red 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This ALWAYS comes up. Sure it helps, but my accent didn't hold a gun to my head and force me to approach, my accent didn't teach me how to keep a woman's attention, or give me the confidence to ask for her phone number. That was all me.

Accent or not these are things we have to learn to grow as men.

Fwiw, I'm a 5'8 Asian, a dime a dozen in LA - i don't exactly stand out from the crowd. These girls wouldn't have picked me out if I didn't present myself.

[–]Cartesian_Duelist 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Machismo is usually most present in female-dominated cultures, hence the continual emergence of 'bro culture'.

[–]TheRealMouseRat 2 points3 points  (3 children)

so you happen to know the exact rate?

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (2 children)

Here. Sort by 'Male Rank'. Australia is actually pretty far from the top. Interestingly, the strongly feminist countries like Sweden are almost all high up. If you sort by reverse order, so that the countries with the lowest male suicides are at the top, you're looking at an exact picture of the most patriarchal societies in the world, with the strongest traditional gender roles.

The two biggest predictors for male suicide are loneliness and inability to provide for their family. Also, divorced men commit suicide at three times the rate of other men.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If you're wondering why countries like Guyana, South Korea, Sri Lanka, and Turkey, among other apparently masculine societies are so high up the list, there is a hidden reason. They all have very high risks of pesticide exposure and poor safety in this area. Pesticide use by farmers has been linked to suicide, especially in men. See here, here, and here, for three examples, out of hundreds of studies and articles.

[–]rockymountainoysters 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If I were looking at only these statistics and nothing else, I'd convert to islam.

[–]mikesteane 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Only a fraction lower than the male rate of road deaths in fact.

[–]MagicGainbow 63 points64 points  (17 children)

Lets be real, Mr Kilmartin (clever bastard that he is) has seen a way to get tons of free advertising(from angry feminists blogging his words) and thus a whole swathe of new male clients.

[–]Luckyluke23 57 points58 points  (0 children)

True... but ita good to see someone from my country saying SOMETHING

[–]boisvertm 12 points13 points  (1 child)

So? Why shouldn't he reap the rewards for speaking out against something that he believes to be wrong.

[–]pavista 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Lets not label every speaking up for male rights as advertising. If he has an anterior motive, maybe, but plenty of feminist 'writers, bloggers, analyst' do what they do to generate revenue.

[–]TreePlusTree 1 point2 points  (0 children)

True, but ideals can only spread if they're profitable. You shouldn't denounce greed, you should find a way to be the object of greed.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (10 children)

Are you a feminist in disguise. This is an idiotic comment and it is astounding that it has been upvoted so many times. Just goes to show that first comment in any post gets upvoted by drones (check if u dont believe me). Maybe blue pill cynical bitches think that all lawyers are just after money but given that 70% of divorce is initiated by women dont u think henwould have been better served by supporting womens rights? Your comment sucks, u r a feminist apologist blue pill beta bitch and somis every little follower robot bitch who upvoted u.

[–]Senior Contributorcocaine_face 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not if he's trying to market towards the male demographic, which he almost certainly is doing.

Everyone is at least somewhat self-interested. He certainly knew what the effects of this would be, regardless if he did it out of the "goodness of his heart" or not.

Even if he is doing it for profit... so? Why would that possibly bother you?

[–]MagicGainbow 0 points1 point  (8 children)

Are you a feminist in disguise.

Yes, ya got me, 'twas all a ruse!

Maybe blue pill cynical bitches think that all lawyers are just after money but given that 70% of divorce is initiated by women dont u think henwould have been better served by supporting womens rights?

His clients are male and often willing to pay extreme sums to see their kids.

Your comment sucks, u r a feminist apologist blue pill beta bitch and somis every little follower robot bitch who upvoted u.

Not sure if troll or just retarded...also spell check and paragraphs, they make a big difference.

[–][deleted] 2 points2 points

[permanently deleted]

[–]MagicGainbow -1 points0 points  (6 children)

Not a retard actually an Australian lawyer so I know what I am talking about.

And I am the King of Siam! Bow before me peasant!

Typos because I was using a phone in a hurry.

They all say that.

This guy is risking his neck and his reputation. He will gain nothing extra out of this. To think that he will attract waves of male clients is deluded.

I'd ask how he's risking his neck, it's not like he normally goes for female clients.

So for you to suggest there is a business motive behind it shows you are naive.

The only naive one is you.

He would have been better off saying that women are entitled to more benefits, then he gets more clients plus the praise of the media and more friendly media attention. No business wants negative media, it can be the death of your business.

I've seen plenty of examples on trp alone that prove that false.

Also this guy had the bravery to say that the presumption that children are better off with women is taken to far by the courts.

He's said nothing that others haven't already said, so brave, much courage, wow.

Every person who believes in the red pill should be looking to this guy as a hero, not suggesting he had an ulterior motive.

Why not both? Strike a blow and increase your rep/gain more clients by taking a stand for the little guy, this is pretty much a stereotype in the media, also trp is not mensrights.

Given that 70% of divorces are initiated by women and they are more likely to get legal aid, why on earth would he pitch for male clients?

Because even if 70% of women initiate the other side still needs a lawyer, as for legal aid, this is often as the initiator has no/little income as the man is the breadwinner.

That is like pitching your business to the lower. smaller demographic who do not instruct you to bill as many hours and cannot pay as much.

I've seen the opposite, men bankrupting themselves in legal battles.

I have a family law division in my firm and we market aggressively towards the female market. We would rather have exclusively female clients.

If what you say is true, that's one firm, this man has seen a niche for himself.

I think you should reconsider your opinion in light of the information I have just provided.

I'm really not, your argument is full of holes and assumptions.

I just think he is a brave professional who is risking damage to his business to stand up against his perception of a social evil. Is this not why we are all here?

Nope, that's r/mensrights, trp isn't about making a difference, just tools for adapting to conditions on the ground.

I get that you hero worship this guy, this isn't the place for that, also paragraphs are your friend, this whole block of text looks like a crazy rant.

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points

[permanently deleted]

[–]MagicGainbow 0 points1 point  (4 children)

Wow you used the word "niche". You are clearly not an expert on business.

That makes no sense.

So you are saying that by trying to get a small market instead of a large one and risking your business and personal reputation at the same time, one can gain a commercial advantage?

As ive already pointed out, he's already targeting that market of male clients, it may be small but look at mensrights, dads will go bankrupt willingly to fight for their kids, it's big bucks, and male clients are hardly a small market.

If woman clients are a big market surely the male market must be as big as you need two people to divorce and I doubt it's hordes of lesbian couples divorcing.

His statements are a form of advertising, essentially he's saying ''guys don't worry i'm on your side in court cases, come to me'' I'd ask how he is risking his business if his clients are male already, he;d be playing risky if he normally had all female clients as he'd risk alienating them.

All he's done is affirm his position and get a load of media outlets to advertise him, clever stuff.

You know nothing about business.

So you keep saying, although you are the one displaying a lack of common sense.

My bet is you go and collect your wage from the real alpha who employs you.

I'm a student, your work for a law firm and like to whine at people on the internet, your statement more accurately describes you rather than me.

I notice you are bringing up the same points again, you didn't bother to actually read/absorb my reply.

[–][deleted] 0 points0 points

[permanently deleted]

[–]MagicGainbow 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Actually I own the law firm.

Interesting, as King of Siam I would like to hire your entire firm.

You are also completely wrong about men spending everything to get their kids. There is no point as they cannot win.

They don't know that, go over to mensrights and you'll see countless stories of men giving all in a hopeless battle to see their kids.

It is far more common for women to spend large amounts on unreasonable disputes than for men.

Sources? I've heard of many feminist firms doing pro-bono work for women, plus the inherent bias favoring women in divorce court would surely mean they'd need to spend less.

lso men are not a niche market

I never said they were, I said he had found a niche by acting as a crusader for men.

they are 50% of the market obviously.

That's what I said, funny before I said that, you were saying men were a ''small market'' Which is it?

I assume you have more smart arse comments and that you still think you know more about the Australian family law industry than me who owns a law firm.

So far you have proven nothing and no you are contradicting yourself/agreeing with me.

Go for it, write another reply and waste your time.

I am King of Siam! I need permission from no man!

The people who have commented that this guy will end up disbarred or lose his business are far more on point than you are.

I'd ask how making comments such as his would get you disbarred.

My guess is that you will still stick to your stubborn little point and rant some more.

You've been mad since this debate began, you are clearly upset and have resorted to bullshit and insults, very bp if you ask me, and rants?

You're the one unleashing angry blocks of texts(nice to see you took my advice about the paragraphs, much more readable ;)

Might I recommend mensrights as being more your cup of tea? I think you'd learn a thing or too there.

[–][deleted] 0 points0 points

[permanently deleted]

[–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (6 children)

In a divorce between lesbians, how does the judge know who to fuck over ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

[–]ChadThundercockII 16 points17 points  (2 children)

The man. They will find one, somewhere, somehow.

[–]kioga86 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Sperm donor for the kid they had tailor made.

[–]ChadThundercockII 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Or the guy one of them used to fuck on the side.

[–]rockymountainoysters 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Someday, we'll end up with compilable statistics on how often child abuse is alleged between lesbian divorcees vs. gay ones.

That will be an interesting day.

[–]systemshock869 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Na when these superior beings get divorced it's sort of like a Louisiana funeral.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (21 children)

Don't get married. If you want a kid with a woman then get a custody agreement before hand. Live with her but keep all finances separate.

Make her pay half for everything.

No courts. No lawyers. No divorce proceedings.

This is equality and women probably won't like it. Your choice is to become her property and risk getting divorce raped or stand your ground and demand she deal with you like a real human being and not chattel.

[–]crosenblum 1 point2 points  (2 children)

This is a practical idea, and I understand the need to protect yourself legally and financially.

What would you do with a child in this situation, to make them feel secure and stable?

Thank you.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You can live with a woman and have a custody agreement with her.

Your kid will feel just as secure in such a relationship as they will in a marriage. In fact, there's no point in even discussing the nature of the relationship with the kid. By the time they are old enough to understand what his parents have been doing he will already feel secure and stable.

Further, with an agreed upon custody arrangement a kid will have more security and stability than a kid whose parents are going to divorce and let a family court decide these things.

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points

[permanently deleted]

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (14 children)


You can do a lot with such an agreement.

For instance, you can agree that joint property will be distributed based on how much each partner paid in. So, if you pay 90% for the house and cars then you'll get 90% of their value down the road.

Now, if you were married you couldn't make a custody agreement because technically you already have "equal" custody by marriage. So, when you divorce the court revisits that custody arrangement and usually sides with the mother.

However, since you are NOT marriage and in good standing with your partner she will agree to a custody arrangement that is in your favor because it keeps you in the relationship and contributing to the kids. Her best interest is served by giving you custody, whereas, women see only dollar signs when they divorce and even more dollar signs if they can push you out of the kid's life.

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points

[permanently deleted]

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (12 children)

I guess it's a hobby. I've studied constitutional law and business law, etc. in college and have a pre-law degree, but never went on to law school.

I also read case law from time to time. In fact, I tend to look up the studies and cases that people use to claim some political point or position. Usually they've read it wrong or deliberately misinterpreted the data so they could grind an axe.

BA in General Studies with emphasis in pre-law and another BA from a second university in psychology.

[–][deleted] -2 points-2 points

[permanently deleted]

[–]Senior Contributorcocaine_face 1 point2 points  (4 children)

Good luck finding a decent woman who will agree to cohabitation AND having kids.

Not that hard, have you tried it? Remember, commitment - any commitment - from a high valued man is a limited resource. If the girl actually likes you/respects you, you can make her understand your reasoning. She may still want a marriage "party", just don't sign the contract.

And if she doesn't understand you or respect your decision?

Then drop her. You can do better. Any girl that will only stay with you if you will sign a contract that can financially fuck you over is, at least by my definition, not a "decent woman". She is completely replaceable.

And your wealth protection schemes only protect wealth from before the marriage. Most men will earn their money after the marriage.

[–][deleted] -1 points-1 points

[permanently deleted]

[–]Senior Contributorcocaine_face 0 points1 point  (2 children)

I've seen the latter happen a significant portion of the time - perhaps more than marriages. Almost everyone I know who is in LTRs (and I'm 30, so it's not an age thing) is cohabitating, sometimes with a kid, and no marriage plans in sight. There are a -few- exceptions.

A medical doctor pakistani girl may stay with you for life if that's your goal. Seems like it would be tough to get doctor and virgin both though.

Still, why get married? I mean I guess if she's religious you have to, but couldn't you sign an Islamic marriage contract and never a western one? That seems like that would be sufficiently binding.

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points

[permanently deleted]

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Wow. You set the bar high.

So, I should marry a virgin? There goes 95% of women over 18.

A prenup? Religious? Good luck.

Not American (I agree).

Those requirements will exclude 99.9% of women. I like my odds better with a domestic partnership.

If she's in love with me and I say that a domestic partnership is the only way I'll commit then she'll agree. If not, then Next!

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points

[permanently deleted]

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"American Woman" was by "The Guess Who".

Good luck trying to find that .1%.

In a room with 100 women .1 of them might be the one for you.

That means you will have to enter 10 such rooms to find her.

Good luck with that.

[–]Lashlarue123 0 points0 points [recovered]

I did. Cultivate your masculinity boy, you'll be surprised.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Why not marriage with a prenuptial? Just curious...

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The biggest reason is that you can't put child custody into a prenup.

If you aren't married and have a kid then you can negotiate on equal terms the custody of your children. Try doing that during a divorce when she hates you and sees dollar signs.

Also, prenups are notoriously unreliable. If she has a good lawyer she can get a prenup thrown out by a judge.

And if she can't then she may resort to false accusations to pressure you into giving her what she wants.

With a domestic contract and already agreed upon custody she has nothing to renegotiate and no court to hear her claims. Everything is settled.

Just sell the house, take your personal property, and leave.


[–]juliusstreicher 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Call me psychic if you must, but, I see a disbarment in some lawyer's future.

[–]Endorsed ContributorrebuildingMyself 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Or a false rape or sexual harassment claim. Those are always good ones to use.

[–]1Claude_Reborn 7 points8 points  (14 children)

No one cares.

Humans are indifferent to male suffering. It's encoded into our DNA. So any argument that is based on people caring about male pain or suffering is doomed to fail.

[–][deleted] 31 points32 points  (3 children)

There are countless stories of men sacrificing for their male friends and family. Men care about men. Why else would subs like this one exist at all?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Look into group preference. Women prefer to help women. Men prefer to help women (around 70%). That means, while there are men who will help you, most would rather help a woman. And this is a situation where helping you is detrimental to women, so, I'm guessing it won't work.

[–]skinnymin -3 points-3 points [recovered]

We get a large influx of attractive female employees here every summer and I've never learned a male name that wasn't here for more than a year. I fuck women so I care about women. Sorry dudes.

[–]VinylGuy420 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Vaginas always come and go, your bros are always there to fall back on. You can't air yourself out to women and let them in without seeing you as weak or losing respect for you. But your make buddies will always be there to pick you up and buy you a beer.

Tl:dr- Bros before hoes

[–]TreePlusTree 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It's encoded into our DNA

So? Hunting is demonized, yet encoded in our DNA. So is rape, murder, theft, fuckin everything illegal practically. To pretend humans cannot be "unnatural" is retarded, you're on a fucking computer dude.

[–]razorwan 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I see where you're coming from, so I think your statement should be tweaked. People care significantly more about the suffering of women and children than they do about the suffering of men. It has been inculcated in most people's minds that men are responsible for their current state of being, or that they themselves are responsible for lifting themselves out of their poor conditions. Women and children, on the other hand, are almost always seen as victims of something caused by men-- no matter how asinine that argument is, especially in the modern world where men and women contribute to the systems of oppression that cause suffering.

Hard truth is that if you're born with a dick and balls, no matter the period of time you're living in, you're getting a raw deal with regards to human suffering. You're going to be at the forefront of it, and less likely to be helped than a woman would be. Granted, in older societies, men were at least rewarded with a societal system where women were subservient and there to help men, as opposed to tear them down further.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It's encoded into our DNA

Not even my toilet is so full of shit

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Stop yer whining.

Yeah, life fucking sucks sometimes. It's a man's duty to make it work for him. Feminists are the ones that ask for handouts.

[–]1Claude_Reborn 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm not complaining.

I'm just starting the facts.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (1 child)

Eh. Let's be honest - humans are indifferent to any kind of suffering if it doesn't affect them directly.

[–]1Claude_Reborn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Eh. Let's be honest - humans are indifferent to any kind of suffering if it doesn't affect them directly.


Humans preference the suffering of women over the suffering of everyone else.

It's a demonstrated phenomenon known as "in group bias"

All things being equal, when a woman is made to choose between using resources to help either a woman or man, women will choose to help the woman 100% of the time.

Men will help the woman 80% of the time.

So the human population will preference women over men, 90% of the time.

Thus any argument or campaign that is based on the faulty assumption that people care about male suffering, over female suffering, is doomed to fail.

It's why feminism has been massively successful at getting all their laws and special shit passed in governments around the world, and the Mens Rights movement is going backwards by comparison

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children)

So I generally shake my head at comments on TheRedPill since I find them to be (obviously) quite biased but I'll agree with you on this one 100%. Family law is disgustingly female centric and something should really be done about it.

[–]TRP VanguardYouDislikeMyOpinion 2 points3 points  (2 children)

The great thing is that a lot of what we talk about can be observed, tested, and confirmed in real life.

I am a curious individual. I would welcome the destruction of trp philosophy in exchange for a core validated truth. The problem is that I get stuck. TRP is like a wall. I will throw everything and the kitchen sink at it, and watch it stand unscathed. I have personally sacrificed many things to try to break trp theories. I would rather lose something I can gain back rather than live my life with the wrong philosophy.

I take all of my life experiences and knowledge and form some conclusions from that. I go online and I find other men from other walks of life, living in different countries, and they come to the same conclusions and notice the exact same nuances that I do.

You have to consider the question of why a level headed person would adopt any of these philosophies. Maybe they are not biased.

The last thing that I will add is that many guys will take one girl and say that she disproves trp. I don't deal with n=1. I deal with the population at hand. If 95% of a sample act a certain way, the 1 girl is an anomaly. More often than not, that 1 girl would probably end up acting like the 95% if it wasn't for a specific circumstance.

Stupid analogy: You don't believe in ghosts, but one cemetery is different. I don't assume it's a ghost at that cemetery, I try to find out what exactly it could be other than a ghost. I'll find something.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Perhaps it's not that those philosophies aren't true, but they don't really leave room to understand the other side of the story. The side where women have more social pressure to attain an unattainable body type, the side where it's easier to tell your daughters to prevent rape than your sons, and my favourite - the side where your voice is systematically silenced by a country not quite so liberal as the USA. Not saying that justifies some of the crazy shit some girls do, but idk, I feel like that side is very steadfastly ignored here sometimes.

I don't actually have much to say in regards to men in Western countries - I've never had a problem with them and they've almost always been courteous to me. But time and time again I've seen the same 'type' of behaviour from Indian men, to a point where I'm pretty sure there is some racial bias in me now. I can't convince you otherwise, but the number of times I've been verbally abused by a total stranger who randomly messages me simply for not giving him my Facebook/Skype is ridiculous. They, as you in trp may call it, lack game. So much of it. No idea why that gets taken out on me though. -.-

I don't pretend you know your philosophy inside out. I personally don't really worry too much about it because if my boyfriend was ever unhappy enough to want out of a long term relationship then hell yes he can have out - there is absolutely no reason why someone should stay in a relationship unless they're 100% happy. Maybe I'm not the type of girl this is aimed at, but I don't feel threatened that my boyfriend will read trp tomorrow and leave me. But I can see how this could create certain situations in real life that are extremely dangerous by creating a very, very unequal power dynamic based on ultimatums and manipulation instead of honest communication. If honest communication isn't working, you probably should even be trying to make it work with whoever the hell you're with.

So do I actually have anything against actual members of trp? Not always - but see that comment at the top from an 'anti-feminist' that's being used to prove how all women are evil? Yeah... Things like that piss me off. While some women no doubt abuse the term, feminism was always about equality. Some pumped up bimbo trying to take advantage of an already precarious situation with sensational headlines like that, plus some guy using it to show how all women these days are evil... Fuck that. If I'm being judged despite giving my boyfriend all the sex he wants (and I want), and all the compromises I make (and he makes) then I suddenly find myself a lot less sympathetic to the men who genuinely were in terrible relationships and so came to trp.

A few of you ruin the name so that no one wants to understand what the rest of you are trying to say.

[–]TRP VanguardYouDislikeMyOpinion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel like that side is very steadfastly ignored here sometimes.

There is plenty of room for it here. It's just largely irrelevant to the topics we discuss. Therefore you don't see it.

Plenty of us understand that side. It's just that if we're discussing the biased court system, branch-swinging, or oneitis. Those things you mentioned have little to do with the topic.

We come here to gain knowledge that will have a positive impact on our life. Further discussion than what we already know about societal pressure on women to attain the perfect bodytype will have little positive impact on our lives.

But time and time again I've seen the same 'type' of behaviour from Indian men, to a point where I'm pretty sure there is some racial bias in me now

I know exactly what you are talking about. Although there are also many Indian men that are great people.

there is absolutely no reason why someone should stay in a relationship unless they're 100% happy.

You must be young. I have not seen this to be the case in any middle aged relationship/marriage that I have seen.

But I can see how this could create certain situations in real life that are extremely dangerous by creating a very, very unequal power dynamic based on ultimatums and manipulation instead of honest communication.

Here's my evil manipulation/ultimatum. I live my life in a certain way and like XYZ, I want to keep living my life in the way that I live it and enjoy what I enjoy. I add people that make a positive impact and remove people that do not.

In my life I've had the best experiences with women that like me. The door is always right behind her, she's staying because she wants to and enjoys my company.

Can I manipulate a girl and use a stacked power dynamic to get what I want? Yes.

I meet a girl who starts using her dirty tricks to get what she wants. She stooped down to that level, and I'll gladly join her at that level to get what I want. It's fair game.

A girl is genuinely nice and treats me well. I'll treat her nicely and things will go well for both her and I.

[–]Endorsed Contributorredpillbanana 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Part of the problem is that there are generally very few consequences for falsely accusing the husband regarding sexual abuse and domestic violence. Thus it has become a tactic to gain the upper hand. Why not use it if there is nothing to lose?

[–]xaphody 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It happened to my brother when his son was born. She had no job and pretty much just shacked up with the next guy. Meanwhile my brother had a good career and a house in his name and was on his way to being married.