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Red Pill ExampleBenevolent alpha wonders why ' My[30m] fwb[29f] broke down crying saying that she "is wasting away her life sucking dick". ' (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by Schrodingersdawg

Summary: Guy tells FWB she can't spend the night since he has work the next day. She breaks down crying.

This post brought up a question in my mind: "Is it possible that one can be a benevolent alpha?"


Body: https://archive.is/JcWvw

This guy is deeper than the original posting sounds. The post isn't the good stuff, but it's pretty standard relationships material.

We made food, had sex, she wanted to spend the night. I told her that she can spend the night on Saturday that I have work tomorrow. She insisted, I told her it isn't happening. She told me alright and headed off to the bathroom.

He held frame, didn't cave into her demands. The fact that sex happened already might've made it easier for our hero to refuse. However, if this was before, BetaMaxtm Billy probably would've agreed and received a night of comfort cuddling from the lass.

I am on my computer and then I hear crying, and she locked herself in the bathroom having a breakdown. She starts crying how she is a failure in life, that her sister has a family, and she is wasting away her life sucking dick and a bunch of other stuff.

Feminism: The wonderful belief that fucking everyone will make you happy because that's what all the guys do.

Now, in a way, this guy cares about the girl. She's just a plate, but he does care about her well-being.

The comments are where the real gold is:

Girl: May I ask why do you have no desire to be in a serious relationship with her? I'm just curious because I was asked to be in a FWB thing before I met my boyfriend and I declined for various reasons (being a virgin at the time), but what bothered me the most was how I was apparently good enough to fuck, but not good enough to date. It hurt especially more because I wanted something more from him and he wouldn't even give me the time of day unless one of us were bored and we were IMing.

Alpha: I can't really answer this question without looking like a douchebag, but the thing is I have a lot laxer standards for whom I am willing to sleep with than who I am willing to make my life partner.

Girl: Can you be more specific?

You shouldn't care about internet people thinking you're a douchebag. I don't care if you're a douchebag or not. We all do douchey things sometimes, I understand.

Alpha: For me I find sex fun so basically a girl that isn't ugly and semi attractive will do for me. for a girl to be my girlfriend, I would want her to be a good bit prettier, have a good personality, a good background etc.

Kelly right now is good for a fwb but if I was looking for a girlfriend, I'd want her to be younger, have less baggage, and prettier.

...

Girls fuck up and think they belong there. Meanwhile the CEO / NBA star / guy next to them is just like:

isn't ugly and semi attractive will do for me.

Now of course, as any guy rises on the SMV ladder, his tastes and standards will improve drastically. But this doesn't change the fact that dudes will fuck and chuck just to get their nuts off.

Responses:

have a good personality

Women with good personalities usually want the same in a partner though, so it looks like you are out of luck there.

Ooh, totally ignoring the point where he's trying to 1) help her, and 2) that she wants a relationship with him. Gotta love that logic.


Are you saying she has no personality? And what do you mean by good background?

Alpha: I just don't connect well with her personality. And by good background meaning she has a good education, good family etc. I am not gonna date a girl who has had drug problems in the past, or failed out of college.

Again, men are the gatekeepers of commitment, women are the gatekeepers of sex.


Damn you're a POS. Younger??? A year younger than you is too old? You've been using this poor woman for 2 YEARS with no regard for her perspective or experience and you mislabel your relationship as "FWB" when you regard her as beneath you, you don't actually act like a friend and yet have been doing the faux-couple thing for, again, 2 YEARS.

You're not boyfriend material, bud.

Mmm... guy reveals that age matters to men. Gets crucified. I swear this could be a troll post with how much TRP is in it.


The one thing that does bother me is: why does this guy care? We've seen him hold frame in our limited examples, with her and with the commentators on his post.

Chad would've just cut her off, ignored her texts, etc. She is a 29 year old who's ridden on the CC, who's dropped out of college and has drug issues.

I am kind of worried about her and I really don't want her to do anything crazy in my place.

Is a 'benevolent' alpha something that's possible? His post and comments imply that in some way, she matters to him more than a simple fucktoy, but less than a relationship kinda girl. He could just theoretically move on.

My take on it is that there were always Chads throughout history. However, due to the repressive societies up through the first half of the 20th century, Chads were, for the most part, taught how to behave with some mediocrum of decency (don't fuck married women, get younger unmarried chicks instead). Whether this teaching was effective or not is a completely different question.

However, in our modern day arena, where boys grow up without father figures (thanks feminism!), there exists no force to regulate Chad Thundercock's Lightning. My dad beat me. My high school football coach's dad belted him if he swore in front of a lady. There were standards that all men had to (theoretically) adhere to in order to get sex, and women who fucked men outside these standards were shamed as whores.

Sure, for every Chad there's 4 boys who become White Knight Manginas, but a single mother can only spend so much time indoctrinating her sons on 'being nice to girls and they'll like you back'.

Look no further than the black community. A generation of boys growing up fatherless has led to increased crime and incarceration rates, and higher rates of teen mothers than other minorities in America. However, the majority of them aren't betas, they don't follow the 20/80 principle, the vast majority of them are alpha as fuck.

Thus, we see the modern Chad, no longer fettered by the upbringing of a stable father to kick him into place.

Hell, we celebrate being a modern Chad here on TRP - not that there's any problem with it. I'm just wondering if any of the older folk here have any insight into this.


Lessons learned:

Well, this is almost too perfect of an example of red-pill ideas in action. The question comes up though, is a benevolent alpha possible? And why are they so rare?


[–]tymet 322 points322 points [recovered]

Of course a benevolent alpha is possible. It's what happens when a man likes his girl/girls but simply likes himself more and put his own desires first. There's nothing wrong with caring about your plates as long as you don't let them use it manipulate you or get you to commit

[–]TomDemian 98 points98 points [recovered]

I care about women as long as they live up to my standards. I enjoy playing the caretaker/mentor role, but only when women deserve it.

[–][deleted] 61 points62 points  (6 children)

only when women deserve it

The problem is, many people think a certain woman is "worth it" or "deserves it" genuinely, and then they get bitten in the ass by it and turn red pillers.

[–]1ubiety 59 points60 points  (4 children)

only when women deserve it

The problem is, many people think a certain woman is "worth it" or "deserves it" genuinely, and then they get bitten in the ass by it and turn red pillers.

More like guys are taught from a young age that every girl is "worth it" and every girl "deserves" a great man and every man is obligated to take in a basket case and make her happy. Feminism 101 dictates a woman should do whatever makes her happy regardless of consequence, and a man shouldn't question her behavior because it's her choice and she's free to do as she pleases... Yet a man gets scrutinized and shamed (shit tested) constantly for having standards and entering into a relationship where he only wants to have fun. Men cannot have fun, casual sex if there's any possible expense toward women. This is called abuse and must never happen to any precious delicate snowflake, she's riding the CC and smashing into the Wall, save her from her age and biological destruction, as a man that's your obligation!

[–]SleepNowMyThrowaway 6 points7 points  (3 children)

OP this is gold

Again, men are the gatekeepers of commitment, women are the gatekeepers of sex.

I'm memorizing that, thanks!

[–]l0ng_time_lurker 25 points26 points  (1 child)

You should, as this is a a RP core tenet.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Spot on.

I told her that she can spend the night on Saturday that I have work tomorrow. She insisted.

If she offered to cook him breakfast, have a hot cup of coffee waiting for him before he went to work and clean his place while he was gone, I'm sure he would have strongly considered allowing her to stay overnight.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That's an astute deduction. How can ANYONE, male or female, say no to that?

[–]user6580 10 points11 points  (2 children)

Yup. I'm willing to teach my gf to be better but as soon as she asks me to do it for her I tell her to fuck off.

[–]pavista 28 points29 points  (0 children)

There are plenty of accidental alphas. They're just moderately high value men with options. Most of them have plenty of beta traits too, but all that really separates them at the end of the day is SMV.

[–]yoga_throw 17 points17 points [recovered]

If you have a good abundance mentality with respect to plates you can "let them go" out of benevolence.

I've occasionally treated plates with kindness and sensitivity knowing that the sex will end but caring more about helping them than fucking them more.

I believe the modern sexually liberated woman under 25 is a victim. Yes, a victim. She doesn't have the intellectual power to evaluate the culture she was born into. Her greatest asset was robbed from her by a sick society. I've benefited from the sickness but part of me feels for its victims.

You can get plenty of sex in this world without being dark triad.

[–][deleted] 22 points23 points  (34 children)

And most men aren't victims of the culture they were born into? Hypergamy is shit, from a male perspective. Women have plenty of options.

[–]Redasshole 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am writting this comment from a very particular chair. RIght now, I live in with a woman who has been a candidate for the presidency of the feminist movement of Canada. Posting on TRP with the very computer she uses to write her shitty and hating articles and books is so exciting. Anyway.

I really don't want her to do anything crazy in my place.

He doesn`t want her to do it at HIS place. Wants to avoid problems. Make sense.

[–]TheJessee 217 points217 points [recovered]

Still a classic, she wastes her life away sucking dick and it's still the guys fault for accepting it

Personal responsibility is still deemed 0 for females

[–]Justathrowawayo 48 points48 points [recovered]

Girl under false pretenses attempts to use sex to convince man to commit to her to obtain his time, status, and resources. Boy wants FWB and is up front and honest with what he wants.

It's still the boy's fault. She was trying to trick and manipulate boy, but is still somehow the victim in this scenario.

[–]2awalt_cupcake 11 points12 points  (5 children)

Question: Do you think women manipulate from the beginning or do they manipulate on the fly ergo when it pops into their head?

For instance, what if she was genuinely upset but if Chad broke frame and settled for her she would have been happy it worked out. Since it didn't, she rationalizes later that Chad is mean. What you said makes so much sense reflecting on the scenario in the post, but that requires a shit ton of thinking after. I wouldn't have processed that if I were actually in the situation. I could hold frame but I still wouldn't have seen through what the girl was actually trying to do.

[–]-Universe- 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Women are manipulative, its their nature. Some are less, some are more. They will do whatever it takes to get what they want.

Part of being a manipulator involves convincing everyone that she's not a manipulator. When in doubt assume she is manipulating you.

[–]AnAdventureCore 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Everyone manipulates each other. Boy, girl, man, woman. We all do it. Our hamsters just help us rationalize our actions.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The whole point of language is manipulation.

Manipulation is best when it's win-win for both parties.

[–]Evolved_Red 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I've always been honest about not entering a LTR. But just ask any man here whom has also been honest up front:

You will always be the bad guy, no matter what.

[–]Mengs87 13 points14 points  (7 children)

No it's not a wasted life. Marriage is a horrible patriarchal institution and she avoided a life of denial and oppression. She's living the feminist dream!

[–]trpftw 3 points4 points  (6 children)

You know I always thought women liked sex. But there always seems to be this repetitive theme going on where they seem to hate sex and only do it to get commitment.

Or they're just all super greedy and want sex and commitment, and having one or the other doesn't make their spoiled ass happy.

[–][deleted] 3 points3 points

[permanently deleted]

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (6 children)

catching a chad is her only hope now

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor 58 points59 points  (5 children)

No, she will snag a beta and divorce-rape him according to plan in 2-4 years, probably while still fucking the mean old Chad.

[–]Myrpl 18 points19 points  (0 children)

And needless to say that the beta will get pussy once every 100 years while she's busy feigning a thousand headaches because he's a good provider but can't give her the tingles.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (2 children)

correction, her only hope at happiness

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She has no hope for happiness

[–]1London-Bananas 105 points106 points  (26 children)

Some of the comments are gold

Alpha OP: I have 0 desire to start a serious relationship with her. I would like to help her out with whatever she is going through but I don't want to give her the message that I want to be her boyfriend.

Bluepill guy (whose name, ironically, is byebyebluepill): Unfortunately, there isn't always a middle ground.

Jokes on you mister bluepill, there totally is. It's called fuckbuddy, FWB, plate, cumdumpster, town bicycle and the likes. The idea that you either need to marry a woman or refrain from touching her altogether is core BP thinking.

The ride goes on

BP: I've been on her side before. She has feelings for you, she wants to be with you, but knows that you don't feel the same way. She continues acting like things are normal because she still wants to be with you. But it really hurts. If you don't want to date her, you need to stop sleeping with her. Two years is a very long time for a FWB situation that is this intimate.

Chad OP: Should I text her that we are over and not to bother coming on Saturday?

BP: Is she your friend at all? I mean dang dude, that's cold. Are you actually worried about her, or do you just not want your life to be interrupted?

What do these people even want? He should stop sleeping with her, except he shouldn't. This girl (who is a self-proclaimed cumdumpster) believes, again, you are only allowed to sleep with a woman if you are willing to be in an exclusive relationship with what the Chad OP called an unstable woman with past drug problems.

Don't worry folks, you haven't nearly seen the end of it:

It seems that she has started to want something more from you than empty sex. She's emotionally attached to you. Since that's the case, it would be cruel to keep sleeping with her. Even if she verbally agrees "it's just sex," the heart is not so resilient. Being so close to a person you love who doesn't love you back is very painful. She needs space away from you to get over you.

Quick note on how sex is empty if it doesn't get a woman resources or commitment of some sort. We have finally arrived at the point where responsibility is taken away so far you shouldn't even listen to her anymore. If she literally says "I want you to have sex with me", you should have inferred that because of her CC history, she really doesn't (I wonder how this works if you reverse it- Oh wait that's called rape). Being a woman, Kelly Cumslut is deemed incapable of making her own decisions and expressing her own wants. Chad should be one step ahead of her own mind and basically the first time she went on her knees to blow him (probably 30 minutes after meeting him) he should have stopped her and went on HIS knees and propose to her instead.

This whole exciting ride remembers me of a very similar post we discussed on the same sub, and the Chad OP from that thread left one very good (and very heavily downvoted) statement before the thread was locked down: Guys aren't vending machines you put sex into and get relationships out of.

[–][deleted] 45 points46 points  (5 children)

Part of what I dislike so very much about responses like this is that they are saying "Don't listen to what a woman says, her silly little mind is not capable of knowing what she wants and articulating it." And yet they think they're advocating for women....

[–]Modredpillschool 36 points37 points  (2 children)

Exactly, feminism is internally inconsistent because they want to claim both that they are strong, independent and capable like men, but that they are also victims and can't make decisions for themselves. I touched on this a while ago:

http://puerarchy.com/2013/07/09/only-white-knights-women-and-feminists-objectify-women/

[–]1aguy01 27 points28 points  (1 child)

I use this argument when people try to shame guys for wanting younger girls. "Well, I'm not a sexist from the 1950s, I think women should be allowed to make their own decisions about what they do with their bodies."

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Some black knighting there;)

[–]1London-Bananas 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Exactly. I would think this is insulting to women, who are thought of by others to be perpetual vitcims who's lives entirely depend on men's decisionmaking.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I don't think anyone should ever underestimate the appeal of being perpetually non-responsible for one's actions essentially at will.

You have agency when you want, and none when you don't. Very convenient.

[–][deleted] 47 points48 points  (3 children)

Bp dudes are so naive its hilarious. Do they have any idea how pathetic they sound?

[–]Dietyz 42 points43 points  (1 child)

Do they have any idea how pathetic they sound?

Ofc not, because they get positive reinforcement from women verbally. TRP gets positive reinforcement from women in a physical sense while being shamed verbally

BP guys just don't know to judge women based on actions rather than words

[–]trpftw 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It's hard to blame people for this attitude though. They just don't know any better. It's like they are uneducated. It is exactly what is taught from a young age, by adults, by movies/tv, by stories, by the politically correct culture.

And men being men, rational, think the following: "well obviously we should listen to what they say, they wouldn't say one thing and then do something else. That would insanity."

The whole idea sounds quite fair and logical: "you give things to women, you commit yourself, you take them to expensive dinners, and they in return may develop feelings for you and will also be loyal, commit themselves, and help out." And for a time, perhaps in the 50s or something, this seemed to work.

[–]2IVIaskerade 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Do they have any idea how pathetic they sound?

Most don't. Some see but refuse to acknowledge. Only the truly broken, those from which all hope of a better life has been wrung, will accept it.

[–]Modredpillschool 21 points22 points  (1 child)

Quick note on how sex is empty if it doesn't get a woman resources or commitment of some sort. We have finally arrived at the point where responsibility is taken away so far you shouldn't even listen to her anymore. If she literally says "I want you to have sex with me", you should have inferred that because of her CC history, she really doesn't (I wonder how this works if you reverse it- Oh wait that's called rape). Being a woman, Kelly Cumslut is deemed incapable of making her own decisions and expressing her own wants. Chad should be one step ahead of her own mind and basically the first time she went on her knees to blow him (probably 30 minutes after meeting him) he should have stopped her and went on HIS knees and propose to her instead.

Very insightful. Blue pill culture is one in which all sex that doesn't pay women is considered wrong and taking advantage. Because deep down, women know sex is transactional.

[–]1TRPingBalls 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I mean he's basically raping her by providing her with consensual sex and friendship without also pledging exclusivity and promising her long term security.

[–]Sementeries 14 points15 points  (4 children)

Girl: May I ask why do you have no desire to be in a serious relationship with her? I'm just curious because I was asked to be in a FWB thing before I met my boyfriend and I declined for various reasons (being a virgin at the time), but what bothered me the most was how I was apparently good enough to fuck, but not good enough to date.

This comment that OP put in the post reeks of one of those "oh me 2, guise!" Where she makes up a bullshit story just to know what it's like to be in that situation.

Who the fuck would ask a girl who is a "virgin" to be FWB before fucking her?

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (3 children)

Vigin can mean many things anymore.. Many things don't count as sex in order to keep that number low..

[–]Sementeries 7 points8 points  (2 children)

What kind of moronic shit is that? Virgin of the mouth, virgin of the ass.

You get fucked, you are not a virgin. Read it and weep.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Not according to women.. Bjs don't count.. Taking it n the arse no count.. Using a condom?? Nah, that doesn't count.

That's how they keep their number sooooi low

[–]Sementeries 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is nothing new. It's one of those topics where you're like "ahh, this shit again?"

In their heads, they actually believe that being a born again virgin and wearing a purity ring literally means they are those things.

[–]Newdist2 7 points8 points  (6 children)

The idea that you either need to marry a woman or refrain from touching her altogether is core BP thinking.

That "core BP thinking" is what built civilization.

It's gone now, of course, and all women are whores.

[–]cariboo_j 24 points25 points  (5 children)

Lifelong monogamy has only been around for a few thousand years. It harnessed male ingenuity and labor to build civilization. By giving every man access to sex it motivated them to produce excess resources.

Before that humans had a tournament mating model, where males engaged in violent male-on-male competition to become the so-called Alpha male and gain access to all the females. The losers were denied access to sex and therefore lacked motivation to produce anything more than was necessary to support themselves.

Now that our civilization has reached such a high level of wealth and prosperity, we've forgotten why we needed this sex for resources marriage contract in the first place. We've returned to a pseudo-tournament model were the majority of women are having sex with a small minority of men.

Some men are becoming aware of this new social contract and using it to their advantage, while others are refusing to participate at all. The Cinderella fairy tale has been exposed for what it is. Women aren't caring or faithful, they just acted that way to thousands of years because (a) they needed male resources and (b) laws and custom required it. Without the Cinderella fairy tale, men have less and less incentive to provide for a family.

Either new technology will fill the void that has resulted from the loss of male motivation, or we will see a major economic collapse in the future.

[–]collidoscope 5 points5 points [recovered]

Only a few thousand years? Yes, that is how long civilization has been around.  

You're saying females are inherently uncaring and unfaithful just because when the reigns have come off, that's how they act. That's like saying kids who are raised without stable parents who become violent criminals are inherently violent. Kids need role models, just like a women need men.

[–]cariboo_j 8 points9 points  (3 children)

How would you suggest putting the reigns back on?

The reigns were produced by necessity. Women relied on and deferred to men because that was the only option in pre-industrial societies where the vast majority of jobs required physical strength.

Material conditions inform culture, not the other way around.

Technology has changed the cultural landscape so that women no longer depend on men. And yes, now that they no longer need male resources, their true nature comes out. Women were only caring and faithful because they needed something from men. It was a facade. Men have invented themselves out of a job, and it's quite clear that their customers were just that - paying customers. Trading sex for resources. That's it.

The only way to put the reigns back on would be to change material conditions, i.e. stop using labor saving technologies, and that would lower everyone's standard of living.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How would you suggest putting the reigns back on?

You don't. You cannot make women walk backwards on this; and there will be no good bit at the end. And putting everyone back to the iron age would make any idea of survival too foul to attempt.

[–]Throwaway9665 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If women are children, then they are not responsible. Most mature teenager in the house.

[–]aazav 133 points134 points  (6 children)

Haha. Because she is wasting her life sucking dick.

[–][deleted] 97 points98 points  (1 child)

chads got work tomorrow while you're washing the cum off your face. life hits hard sometimes

[–]fucking_killYOURSELF 34 points35 points  (2 children)

I agree with you. The problem is that under "True Equality"TM he is "wasting away his life getting pussy" just as she is. Equally destructive, right? Wrong. Society sees it as if the man is taking advantage of a poor, defenseless woman. Which is why equality is tilted in the woman's favor aka horse shit.

She is wasting her life sucking dick because women's value deteriorates the more she strays from the good girl virgin image. He is gaining value because men's value and status is linked to how tough and masculine you are (ability to get pussy w/ minimal effort)

[–]the_code_always_wins 14 points15 points  (0 children)

The biological clock strikes again. Girl is at the wall (29). She knows that she only has a few years to start a family. Guy is looking for a younger girl and has time.

[–]indlife 90 points90 points [recovered]

Of course some posters are bashing him for actions she is 50% responsible for. Typical. I liked his comment about how she isn't gf/wife material:

For me I find sex fun so basically a girl that isn't ugly and semi attractive will do for me. for a girl to be my girlfriend, I would want her to be a good bit prettier, have a good personality, a good background etc. Kelly right now is good for a fwb but if I was looking for a girlfriend, I'd want her to be younger, have less baggage, and prettier.

I've used the term baggage discussing relationships many times with people. I think ultimately many women who party and have fun come across to lots of guys as having too much "baggage." This guy basically validates what I've been saying. Of course he gets down voted for his comment. Then he gets bashed for his comment, so someone responds:

Man had standards, call the police

Down voted of course! That was funny though. The white knights over there make me sick though. She is a "poor woman"

[–]1London-Bananas 74 points75 points  (8 children)

This is the most hypocritical part about feminism and blue-pill thinking as a whole: the idea that women are capable of making their own decisions but never responsible for the consequences. She's an independent woman but when she gets tired and confused from all that spinning the guy in the OP is a shitlord for not picking up the shards of wasted opportunity.

Although at the RP we say men and women aren't equal, we are more for equality egalitarian than BP is. The whole core of TRP is that you take control over your own life, and it's your responsibility. That goes for both men and women.

[–]1RPAlternate42 17 points18 points  (4 children)

I think it's better to say that RP is for egalitarianism... Not equality.

The former means both sides are given the same opportunities; the latter means both sides are exactly the same.

I haven't seen anything in RP that demands that women get paid less or that women shouldn't work or that thy should be stripped of rights. I do see that RP demands that women and men are treated the same and are forced to take responsibility for their own actions.

[–]MAWL_SC 3 points4 points  (3 children)

There have been discussions here about revoking voting privileges from women.

[–]1RPAlternate42 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Then we should discuss voting rights limited only to men who own property and businesses.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

And businesses? I think you need to pay taxes. And welfare and FU

[–]1RPAlternate42 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Welfare and taxes wouldn't pass far when your representatives are voted in by business owners.

[–]StManTiS 6 points7 points  (0 children)

She's is never responsible for NEGATIVE outcomes. She will take credit for every positive outcome without mentioning anyone else.

For example I had my roommate leave for 3 months for work. Had to fill his place. Ended up living with a girl. She had friends over and they all commented on how nice the place was. All she said was, Thanks. I know.

The fuck does she know? I brought those couches up three flights of stairs, I cleaned those floors, I bought that TV, I mounted that rug on the wall. But she is full well able to take credit for all of it in front of friends. It is never my roommate did a nice job. It is always something she did. She buys a throw pillow and takes credit for the whole room.

[–]RedPillProphet 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Although to be fair, in this scenario all the power does lie in OP's hands. He could do whatever he wishes in this situation and it is what will happen.

Similar to the hold all doable women have on 90% of the male population.

[–]zeny_two 7 points8 points  (0 children)

That's true, until she gets pregnant. Then she has his balls in a vice grip. Always remember, if a near-wall plate or FWB brings up a serious relationship, the safest course is to next.

[–]ILoveSunflowers 89 points90 points  (3 children)

hahahaha those alpha widows are in full effect in that thread. Love it, dude is asked what he wants in a woman, he says nah, you guys won't like it, they insist, he tells them, they FREAK. Truth is bitter medicine to people that are sick.

[–]Pube_Stretcher 16 points17 points  (0 children)

"No one cares if you're a douchebag online" while his comments hit -60.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

The insanity, anyone who operates with mode of thinking, and thinks they're not be insane....is a woman. I guess this is the result of telling people they're always right. God the entitlement and narcissism is other level with these people.

[–]Endorsed ContributorObio1 118 points119 points  (5 children)

"Benevolent" is a big word, and can mean a lot of things.

Eg: I used to live in a great loft in a somewhat sketchy neighborhood. When I lived there I would always walk my plates out and personally put them in a taxi before going to sleep. That's being gentlemanly while still maintaining complete frame. So that kind of benevolence, yes of course that's still alpha.

But if benevolence means turning a plate into an LTR out of pity, then no, you can't be a benevolent alpha.

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorVasiliyZaitzev 51 points52 points  (2 children)

But if benevolence means turning a plate into an LTR out of pity, then no, you can't be a benevolent alpha.

Dead on balls correct.

Damn you're a POS. Younger??? A year younger than you is too old? You've been using this poor woman for 2 YEARS with no regard for her perspective or experience and you mislabel your relationship as "FWB" when you regard her as beneath you, you don't actually act like a friend and yet have been doing the faux-couple thing for, again, 2 YEARS.

This is just DRIPPING with entitlement. The FWB cum dumpster "deserves" a relationship b/c she's put in the time. Just like a 'nice guy' deserves lots of hawt sex b/c he's 'so good', and finally got that 10th stamp on his 'nice guy' card.

[–]yaardi 33 points34 points  (0 children)

"Men are not vending machines you put sex coins into and get a relationship out"

[–]2awalt_cupcake 10 points11 points  (0 children)

This is just DRIPPING with entitlement. The FWB cum dumpster "deserves" a relationship b/c she's put in the time. Just like a 'nice guy' deserves lots of hawt sex b/c he's 'so good', and finally got that 10th stamp on his 'nice guy' card.

These types logical correlations comparing the hypocrisy of women and the male equivalents need to be posted somewhere. Every time I read one like this I'm like yeah where is this going and then this sentence comes in:

Just like a 'nice guy' deserves lots of hawt sex b/c he's 'so good', and finally got that 10th stamp on his 'nice guy' card.

Yeah that's exactly what it's the equivalent of!

It blows my mind.

[–]steelerfaninperu 42 points43 points  (1 child)

This here is the best answer. You can be polite and show decency without being a bitch.

Ideally the best way to do is to take charge and establish the frame right off the bat. I don't wait until the girl asks me "can you walk me out?" I'll just tell her when it's time, and say "I'll call you a cab and walk you out."

When you wait for them to ask for these courtesies (which IMO you should probably do anyway) you're lending them leverage and power. Now the ball is in her court. In a game of tennis, the advantage is to the server. Always be serving, never returning

[–]RosewoodPill 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Drake would just "Call her ass an uber"

[–]Shade_Raven 65 points66 points  (0 children)

Girl : I don't like him like that

That's cool

Guy : I don't like her like that

He's s monster

[–]moneyandsexislife 110 points110 points [recovered]

Why is it his problem?

She wasted her life being pumped and dumped. She gave her only asset for free and, even worse, under false pretenses since her true aim was commitment all along, without exception the rider's intent. Whoever gives her commitment, she fucks it up, or she wouldn't be such a failure. She had her run at life. She lost. This is his responsibility because she took a bad deal for the millionth time in her life? By that logic, who else should he get on the cross for?

Every day, there are going to be people trying to manipulate a man's emotions into sacrificing himself for their benefit whereas if the situation were reversed, they would piss on the man except when he's on fire.

The only benevolence by a man is total self-centeredness. "It takes a village" is just a shitty expression.

[–][deleted] 38 points39 points  (15 children)

This entire post is spot-fucking-on.

And it's sad, really. Consider how you felt when you swallowed the pill and realized that you'd been lied to, that you'd been made a fool of, and how much time you'd wasted by playing the game of life with such a faulty strategy.

Women end up experiencing this sometimes as well. Like Billy Beta doesn't understand why he can't get his HB9 that he orbits to fuck him, women wonder why Chad Thundercock won't commit to them. The difference between men and women in this case? Women can never undo the damage. Time, for women, is far more important. not to mention the fact that high partner count severely damages a woman. It's sick that both sexes have been lied to and misled.

However, we can't save anyone. Nobody wants to be saved past a certain point. And since we've said that women, once broken by the CC can't be fixed anyways, the only thing that the truth would do is cause suffering. Men are the only ones who benefit from the truth. Besides, it's not like women don't have a soft landing in the form of beta bitch boys who are standing at the exit of the CC waiting for their princess. But is this benevolence (since Billy Beta will accept her past and love her anyways?) or is this really harmful to the woman (and women as a whole) by allowing them to stay in their destructive ways?

Since this is all true, you are correct when you say that the only benevolence by a man that is acceptable in this current society is total self-centeredness. I desperately wish that I could help others see the truth and stop their destructive ways. But here's the thing. I've tried. I tried to save someone, and wouldn't you know it? They didn't want to be saved. All people are like this. And while I believe TRP greatly influenced me to save myself from my destructive ways, I ultimately believe that it was by my own choice and my own spine that I did so. Everyone must save themselves.

[–]John_E_Vegas 43 points44 points  (5 children)

Nailed it.

Except for one thing. You say she played the game and lost. It's false. For any woman, even this one, the game continues.

This one just finally hit the wall, that's all. And now that she hit it, she will likely begin to slowly adjust her own perceived SMV downward and she'll ultimately settle for some balding betabux dude that she snivels to her sister about later.

It's all good gents. She'll find her a man. No need to get benevolent. This Alpha is actually helping her see the error of her strategy.

She stayed at the $100 Blackjack table too long. Now she has to go play nickle slots.

Move along. Nothing to see here.

[–]Newdist2 9 points10 points  (2 children)

But because she's taken so much alpha dick, she'll be far less happy with the beta schlub that she eventual ends up marrying.

[–]John_E_Vegas 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes that's why I said she would snivel to her sister about him

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (1 child)

The game does continue. It always does, I suppose. However, it must continue at a table with lower stakes. Your blackjack table analogy is brilliant.

It's all a game. Choose an optimal strategy for the best chance at success. If you are a logical person, you know this to be true. Most people, however, like the abstract ideas presented to us by popular media far too much to view the world with a critical eye. You could almost compare the red and blue pills to different ways that players of a game view their game. An amateur, by definition, plays for the love of the game. They don't really care too much about a loss here or there and they aren't super competitive. They play with no real hopes of going anywhere with the game (but don't you ever tell them this to their face, they'll be highly insulted). Meanwhile, a professional is all about playing the game optimally and using this mindset to advance him- or her- self to the next level.

Sexual strategy is a game. Play it well to win.

Life is a game. Play it like a professional to succeed.

[–]ILoveSunflowers 11 points12 points  (2 children)

It takes a village

that's an expression about raising children, not sure how that applies here

[–]rp_divorced 5 points6 points  (0 children)

women are the oldest children in the room

[–]hirjd 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A village is a better cc than a hermit.

[–]ferengiprophet 87 points88 points  (16 children)

I have no emotions to spare for a girl that gets into FWB relationships but I think that feminism has not only screwed over guys but girls as well. They're taught to prioritize their careers first and then to start their families so that they can have it all. The irony is that all the sleeping around before husband-searching breaks them down into unmarriageable material. By the time they have have established their careers and been with "every type of guy" as Cosmo recommends, they're around their late twenties or thirties, unable to compete with the hot 21-year-olds fresh off the campus.

The crazy thing is that not even men ever got everything they wanted. They always had to compromise their health, time, money, and resources to provide for their families and because of the stress of it all, they died before their spouses on average.

Feminism has sold these women a terrible lie and I wonder if they'll continue to perpetuate it, if only to not be alone and have someone to commiserate with.

Edit: rephrased existing content and added some new thoughts

[–]ILoveSunflowers 41 points42 points  (10 children)

but you can never point this out, tried talking candidly with my wall hitting cousins and they literally started screaming at me and shaking with anger.

[–]RedPillProphet 46 points47 points  (0 children)

One of the most prominent signs that you are on to a major truth is that it will severely piss people off. It could be religion, money, sexual preferences or anything else of importance. That anger is a direct response to the cognitive dissonance they feel between the truth making perfect logical sense and the contradictory bullshit beliefs they're holding on it.

Hammering the truth at that point rarely helps unfortunately.

[–][deleted] 30 points31 points  (3 children)

I heard once that all anger comes from a place of fear. Definitely the case with your cousins.

[–]ILoveSunflowers 24 points25 points  (2 children)

absolutely, this was all on the heels of a conversation about how they were trying out tinder and getting fucked and chucked and couldn't figure out why they were being treated this way.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

The willful ignorance is laughable. Why are they treated that way? Because they literally signed up for it

[–]1independentmale 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Then when you try to explain it to them, you're the bad guy. Funny that.

[–]John_E_Vegas 17 points18 points  (2 children)

OMG. I am smiling from ear to ear just imagining that conversation. I'd pay $100 just to participate.

[–]1RPAlternate42 10 points11 points  (1 child)

I will pay $101.

Unless the flat rate for all comers is $100 the. I should just pay that.

[–]Modredpillschool 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I got a chuckle from your thinking process.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

That means it's true.. Otherwise they would just laugh and call you dumb..

Truth stings the most

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

what did they say? i want to hear!!!

[–]2 Senior Endorsed Contributorvengefully_yours 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I am at least three of the cosmo types. Older, bad boy, and man in uniform. They have gotten me plenty of tail.

[–]cariboo_j 2 points3 points  (0 children)

they can have it all.

Ha so true. No one can have it all. There are trade-offs to everything in life.

[–][deleted] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

Yeah you could be a benevolent alpha but I don't think that's the proper word to describe him. Yeah, he is showing care for her, but even Chad is going to get those feelings, like it or not we're still humans and we have a desire to bond with others. Chad isn't immune to feelings. However this guy in concerned with how she has the power to do something bad in his presence or to his property, he's more worried about her, but for his sake. To me he sounds more intelligent and risk averse

[–]Senior Contributorexit_sandman 34 points35 points  (0 children)

"Is it possible that one can be a benevolent alpha?"

Sure, if he wants to be one he should accept that she wants more out of the relationship than he does and cut her loose.

And why are they so rare?

If you spend your time thinking how you can make live easier for others you're probably also the guy who wouldn't entertain the idea of an FWB-relationship in the first place because of the risk that she falls for you.


It's interesting, though:

I've been on her side before. She has feelings for you, she wants to be with you, but knows that you don't feel the same way. She continues acting like things are normal because she still wants to be with you. But it really hurts.

If you don't want to date her, you need to stop sleeping with her. Two years is a very long time for a FWB situation that is this intimate.

The same situation as a nice guy orbiter, but while the woman gets full understanding, the orbiter is branded as a lying piece of shit because he "pretended he was happy being just friends".

[–]1favours_of_the_moon 28 points29 points  (1 child)

Yeah, he's "not boyfriend material."

So she's free to GTFO, right?

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Nope, he said that and did exactly what they said to do:

and it was: OMG YOU'RE COLD!

For doing what they told him to. The cognitive dissonance is amazing

[–]LionLaw 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Those comments lol.
The guy explains that he prefers girls at least 6 years younger than him and he gets Downvoted to hell.
He explains that a FWB is two people mutually agreeing to enjoy eachothers bodies and he gets Downvoted to hell.
He explains his own personal beliefs on having sex with a woman and being in a committed relationship to one and the quality of expectations for each one and he gets Downvoted to hell.
R/relationships is a fucking cesspool of filth, guarantee you those fucks are some of the most ugliest betas and ham beasts on reddit

[–]Brian_Official 21 points22 points  (0 children)

First of all, he explicitly states he doesn't want her doing crazy shit in his apartment.

And based on his language it just sounds like he has a reasonable capacity for empathy and a high mirror neuron count.

Men and emotions is something, I think, still gets skirted under the rug by a good majority of posters here. It's like as soon as the word comes up half the people become coach Sauers:

"TAKE A SALT TABLET, SALLY!"

And that's it, really not very productive or useful, and I wouldn't really call it Alpha. Now obviously as men is important to not be dictated by emotions but I don't believe they can simply be ignored entirely, at least not in the long-run.

[–][deleted] 30 points31 points  (5 children)

You can date around with different GFs (what's called spinning plates here) and not be a douche.

The reason I say date around or play the field instead of spinning plates is because the former two are socially acceptable, if not considered perfectly normal and defensible behavior, while the latter is not - while all three mean exactly the same thing.

It's a choice of language as we've talked about often here on TRP. TRP language tends to be less euphemistic and direct with that playful masculine edge we enjoy. It's not sanitized for female feels consumption.

We notice how context, framing and language plays a part in how things are perceived.

We unplug from gynocentric language which supports gynocentric expectation - which in this case means because this woman had sex with this man she is now entitled to being wifed by him and his handing over his paycheck to her twice a month. Seriously - that is the feminist female and mangina expectation.

Everyone get that? Women believe men are vending machines (to use the twox/feminism vernacular) for which they can put sex coins into and get lifelong material benefit from.

They fully expect a woman can act like a complete moron through their 20s, living selfishly and recklessly with drugs, irresponsibly with college and career, and then have it all get fixed by Captain Save-A-Ho, because they sucked some dick and laid on their backs, and live happily ever after with children, family, nice cars, nice homes and credit cards - The End.

That hardly fits the equality narrative that SRS and the prog lemmings here on reddit like to spin, but that is the expectation. They argue that the mystical Patriarchy robs women of having personal agency, but when it comes to actual instances where women have opportunity to bear responsibility for their own condition they act indignantly when men refuse to carry water for them.

Meanwhile the reality is - woman has wasted away her life with frivolities and now that she's slamming into the wall she's throwing a teary eyed tantrum like a child in a grown man's bathroom, because of her unreasonable expectation of giving up the pussy casually for 2 years (while fucking plenty of other dudes all the time in between) means he owes her a marriage. She's completely deluded and so are the people that support her behavior.

Let it be clear that refusing this woman her "In case of emergency spread legs" safety net is not being a douche. Its having the both the intelligence and the balls not to be some dipshit female's manipulated doormat. It's called self-preservation.

Unplug from gynocentric slave mindset. It is never an immoral choice not to grant a relationship benefit to a woman because she's starting to feel the weight of years long bad decision making, it's personal consequences, and is crying about it.

I think many people fall into the trap of thinking that behaving this way is somehow immoral or even "Dark Triad", because it is not. If you do, then you need to revisit your personal perceptual set and perform some introspection. All this is - is setting up boundaries that properly guard against being manipulated by the selfish designs of other people and their drama.

To me, Dark Triad is being manipulative & deceitful - a fucking pussy hunting Sith Lord who doesn't care about anything other than getting balls deep in as many bitches as he can. A nihilist - a narcissist - a black-hearted player who gives zero fucks about consequences. Someone who lives for the thrill of the hunt and relishes busting bitches out as his sole purpose. A total savage who lives to feel the submitting wet pussy splash wantonly on his nutsack while he exudes his power with every forceful thrust. A conscienceless, single minded sick fuck. I know because I lived that life for a decade of my life and 10 years ago and I decided that although its intoxications are rich, it left me damaged and unfulfilled. I wouldn't recommend being true Dark Triad over any real long term, because the damage wrought as result is very difficult to separate oneself from. There are eventual personal consequences.

I think many people on TRP get caught up in the powerlust being Dark Triad brings you - almost to a romantic level. We want women to desire us. We want money and power. We want dominion over our personal conditions and we want to project our influences. We believe Dark Triad will get us those things (not necessarily the case). Problem is we get caught up falling into the trap gynocentricism springs. This is the trap that tells you acting in a rationally self preserving way is somehow immoral. We accept the bad label, because bad gets us laid, bad is good. We happily personify the straw man affixed to us. We wrongly term setting natural healthy boundaries with people we are in personal relationships with as Dark Triad when it definitely is not.

To me any true life long alpha has authentic principles that help construct his charisma. While life may call for episodes of Machiavellianism (absolutely it does), only very few can survive and thrive strictly that way (think Bill Clinton).

This is especially true when one begins to think about legacy and having children. There will be certain people in your life you will want to love and be loved by - and that is impossible to have when you are a total sociopath.

The beneficial alpha does exist. As a matter of fact, I would say over the long term of one's life it's probably the best choice to pursue.

[–]cptspiffy 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Let it be clear that refusing this woman her "In case of emergency spread legs" safety net is not being a douche. Its having the both the intelligence and the balls not to be some dipshit female's manipulated doormat. It's called self-preservation.

Replies like this are why I come back to these threads 10-20 hours after they are first posted.

Bravo.

[–]PM_Me_For_Drugs 4 points5 points  (3 children)

This is an incredibly insightful post.

I can relate to your description of the "dark triad" mindset, and I agree - That type of attitude that makes perfect sense when you're young, but keeps you from integrating into society when you're older. You won't thrive in a civil society if you're unnerving everyone with your toothy, bloodstained grin. No one wants to bring a hungry wolf aboard their ship, so you're only master of your own destiny until a hard rain begins to fall.

True strength comes with wisdom and knowledge of one's limits, and that can't be attained in a "dark triad", beastly mindset. A "beneficial alpha" is a wolf that doesn't threaten the older wolves, but isn't entirely neutered and tame like his weaker pack-mates.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (2 children)

Social dynamics become less primal and more complex as you age (mostly because people tend to grow in awareness and wisdom as they age).

When you are twenty one being a jacked up savage gets you a metric ton of pussy - and that's OK because that's all you really want at twenty one.

However, as you age the game becomes much more than just attracting women via aesthetics - there are things like business, careers, family, children - and a host of various social interaction. People begin to figure out how to insulate themselves from savages and you either adapt and grow as a man or you don't and stagnate.

Also, as we experience more of life we contemplate it's meaning and many of us discover that nihilism is emptiness. Is this all that we are? Is there nothing more?

I look at TRP and I see it as an avenue for men to achieve personal fulfillment despite the deck being stacked against us.

But what is personal fulfillment? I think it is different things for different people - and ultimately we each have our own fingerprint of what it truly is - interwoven with certain commonalities.

For me, I discovered that pure savagery was ultimately unfulfilling and eventually became self destructive as the civil world and I began to recoil from one another in disgust. When I finally ended that part of me, it was like setting down a great weight. Now I've come to understand that some sort of moral theory must be applied to my state of living. I try to do that through having consistent principles, but always keeping that potential of aggression in reserve for when I need to draw upon it. Let's face it the world is an unkind place, but mostly people try to deal with that fact by living with some sort of civility. As I previously stated, you either adapt to that or fail. Our awareness level for both civility and savagery must be kept high in order to live successfully, and we need to be able to make choices we can live with - both in the moment and years in the future.

[–]HAMMURABl 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Also, as we experience more of life we contemplate it's meaning and many of us discover that nihilism is emptiness. Is this all that we are? Is there nothing more?

it seems that your way of life is based on there being "something more to life [than nothing]". which is why you rationalize the game becoming "more complex as you age".

there really isn't. what is happening is your lizard brain telling you to reproduce and thus creating a narrative thats redpill but fits a family life. this is similar to women getting baby rabies.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You can't possibly believe that life game is the same at 21 as it is at 45 - because let me tell you it isn't - not even close. It's exponentially more difficult. The good news is with practice one becomes more proficient, so it can seem easier - or at least it should, but a part of that learning adjustment is caging the monster when appropriate. You learn that in order to have the things that came easily to you as swashbuckling pirate at 21, one needs to build a personal infrastructure that affords you those results. Women see diminishing returns in 40 year old broke dicks, if you know what I'm saying. Also it's just not the money either that sets you up (although it is a necessary component), its everything that goes into making one the least susceptible to the manipulations of other as humanly possible. That takes a large degree of personal groundwork.

At 21 all you need is body, attitude and frame to have that mastery and live the life of Riley. At 40 those things are just the foundation of what you need.

As far as the kids thing is concerned, while I understand that especially in this day and age the proposition of children and family is high risk and not suited for every man, there is something to be said for the Patriarch who has built his personal empire and a legacy to pass on to his adult sons and daughters - even if that legacy is something as simple and sublime as a set of values or a code of living. When you reach middle age the end is no longer beyond the horizon, you can see it in the distance. There is still a great deal of joy to be had in children and grandchildren and the togetherness of family in the autumn of our lives. These things are foreign concepts to the young man with the warrior mindset - even seen as laughable if not foolish - but they are product of a lifetime of good decision-making.

The choice is yours - you either prioritize your independence and freedom early, which can be a very logical decision seeing that many men stay active and live adventurous lifestyles well into their 60s... Or you choose the path of marriage and family, which has a much greater degree of difficulty because you put yourself at greater personal risk, but I would argue has a better longer term payoff.

I don't believe there is a flat right or wrong choice when framed in aggregate. Whether right or wrong is up to the individual.

[–]jaredschaffer27 10 points11 points  (3 children)

Imagine if you logged onto Amazon a few times a week and browsed, read the reviews, and generally had an enjoyable shopping experience only to be told at checkout: "Amazon will accept payment for all items but will not be sending you any of these items."

How many times of swiping your credit card would it take for you to be convinced that you're not going to get your items? More importantly, if you did this 30, 40, even 50 times, why would anyone on Earth give you sympathy?

[–]Glenbert 15 points16 points  (1 child)

Feminism: The wonderful belief that fucking everyone will make you happy because that's what all the guys do.

This is bumper sticker worthy material.

[–]2IVIaskerade 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Feminism: The wonderful belief that fucking everyone will make you happy because that's what all the guys at the top do.

Because the 80% are invisible.

[–]Rhenthalin 18 points19 points  (1 child)

This is a classic inversion of the nice guy rebuttal "You don't put friendship coins in and sex pops out." well, you don't put sex coins in and a relationship pops out either.

[–]2IVIaskerade 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Sometimes they try to force you into a relationship by taking your sex coins and having a baby pop out.

[–]Jaww 25 points25 points [recovered]

About single mothers - I was raised by a single mother and she installed an equality mindset in me. She said if you take her out on dates, split the bill. Don't get her flowers. Don't be that guy. She taught me that I had a fuck tonne of value and a girl would be lucky to be with me. She taught me how to not be controlled by a woman, not to break frame or crumble. Purposefully. She'd throw a hissy fit, if I reacted she'd call me out on it and over time my behaviour changed automatically. I'm 20 almost nothing goes past me with woman.

She is an Iranian woman who despises her 'beta' male husband, socially awkward & timid husband, hence the separation. She didn't want me to grow up like that. I swear most single mums are divorced for the same reason? Wouldn't they want to raise their boy to be an alpha male and successful?

[–]Glenbert 13 points14 points  (8 children)

This just doesn't sound credible to me. Your mother tests your shit test handling abilities? What is she some sort of Kung Fu master?

If this is a legitimate description of things congrats, but your mother represents 0.01% of the single mothers out there.

[–]hou12 13 points14 points  (4 children)

No, I believe him, because I had pretty much the same scenario, the only difference being that my mother is still married to my dad. She has actually even told me on a few occasions not to get married and not to have kids, but to focus on living my life instead. She also tends to point out and react negatively to men with beta behavior.

You're right that this is a rare thing, but I can confirm that it does exist.

[–]forscienceyeah 20 points20 points [recovered]

He should let her down nicely, like one of the posts in there says. This is almost the inverse of 'friend-zoning' for a guy. Just like a man shouldn't be around a woman he has romantic and sexual feelings for, doing friend stuff in the hope a relationship forms (and in some cases being lead on by the woman) a woman shouldn't try to use sex and romantic gestures in order to get the man to commit to something deeper if he doesn't wish, or be around a man who's leading her on with sex.

If its causing mental anguish, just as the woman should tell the guy, there's no chance of sex/relationship, its probably best we don't see each other at all, he the man should find another plate who knows what the deal is - that commitment isn't going to happen no matter how much sex is offered. Women, gate-keepers of sex, men gate-keepers of commitment.

[–]Harry_Teak 45 points46 points  (7 children)

Men get stuck in the friend zone, women get stuck in the fuck zone. The difference is that women get something out of being in the fuck zone.

[–]Dietyz 18 points19 points  (5 children)

The fuck zone works sometimes too, people get attached or people get pregnant all the time

Show me a friendzone dude getting laid

[–]Harry_Teak 10 points11 points  (3 children)

That was my point. At least those in the fuck zone are getting laid. Sometimes they also get companionship, and perhaps the occasional free meal. The guy in the friend zone gets to help 'em move and drive 'em to the airport.

"But.. but... I want a real relationship!" What most women don't understand about the fuck zone is that it is a real relationship. They walk by people every day who'd absolutely love having any kind of intimacy with another person, but they're whining because they can't monetize their situation. Be happy about what you've got ladies, one day you might not have even that so enjoy it while it lasts.

Sadly, most of them do not really understand relationships so they scream down life's highway towards the wall at 110 mph while jamming out to What Have You Done For Me Lately and nursing a bad case of road rage.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child)

lol women be happy with something? Good one!!

[–]Harry_Teak 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I saw a happy woman once. I also have a picture I took of Bigfoot.

[–]1whatsazipper 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Friendzone is all cost, no benefit. However, it is self-imposed. No one is obligated to be a pathetic orbiter.

[–]Tom_The_Human 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Also, he needs to get out as I could see her sticking a pin in one of his condoms or "forgetting" to take the pill.

[–]Profdiddy 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I really wanted to bring this to trp attention. This man was straightforward about his intentions and honest with his thoughts. These hypergamists lost their shit when their position relative to an alpha was revealed to them.

[–]Endorsed Contributorvandaalen 9 points10 points  (1 child)

One of most misunderstood things about TRP is that putting yourself first and acting accordingly does equal to stop caring about others.

It is not inevitable to become a fucked up egocentric and egoistic sociopath to be successful and to live an "alpha"-lifestyle, although that is totally up to you.

In fact I personally regard it as much more benefitial to always try to create win-win situations and to genuinly care for the members of your group. The constructs which result out of it are much more likely to be stable and benefitial for yourself in the long run, while sociopathic behaviour essentially aims for the immediate reward and it will often backfire later. Not every DT is as much of a machiavellian genius and will end up at the top of food chain as a CEO of a Fortune 500 company, although their narcissm often tells them otherwise.

As an example I am genuinly caring about my sub-ordinates in the kitchen and still I manipulate them into doing certain things, that they would usually not want to do (which often is connected to something as simple as their comfort zone), because I see benefits for both of us in the long run.

[–]marty2k 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Women (or women advocates) will never cease to amaze me with their hypocrisy. Every single time, I always think I've seen one height, one shining example of the most ridiculous hypocrisy that I'm sure no one could talk, and I'm always blown away by the next one. I think it has to do with women attempting logic as men do, it always happens.

I really want to go through and dissect every single hypocrisy here, but it's just too much. Pretty much these women are giving the exact same attitudes, reasons, and hate as typically lampooned "nice guys" do. Like word for word almost. I guarantee if you switched the genders and took away the fact they were already fucking, these posts would be spread across the internet over the neckbeard / nice guy teasing boards.

[–]Knehmo 10 points11 points  (7 children)

Am I the only one who finds abstract references to "the black community" as a justification for theory annoying? How do you know that the majority of blacks aren't betas or don't innately follow the 20/80 principle like those of different racial backgrounds? Blanket statements like "the vast majority of them are alpha as fuck" or "they are naturally RP because of hip-hop culture" brazenly takes representations for reality. I mean, are these the same people who look at the pictures of McDonalds menus and think to themselves "Damn these fries are gonna be fresh 100% of the time!" or "Golly, that all beef quarter pounder is defo gonna have some fresh lettuce".

[–]TK-85 8 points9 points  (6 children)

Yeah, considering how the black community is a matriarchy, and the men are generally subordinate, I don't know how anyone can produce a claim of alphaness anywhere in there.

[–]Knehmo 4 points5 points  (1 child)

The black community is a microcosm of society at large. Aside from executive level communities and other niche areas like that, cultural communities are generally matriarchal. Notice how difficult it is for men in general to come to terms with the Machiavellian tendencies of women ( why else does TRP harp so much about the corrosive nature of feminism or how taking the RP cannot be forced? Where else would subreddits like TRP be necessary other than in matriarchal contexts?). Of course there are black alphas, as there are asian/indian/hispanic/white ones. Other than for the sake of race bating or circle jerking, I see no warrant behind saying that alphas can't come from matriarchal backgrounds. Of course they are rare, but isn't that the point? Aren't they always?

[–]TK-85 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I see the black community as the end result before I see at as a microcosm. The rest of society, across the globe is generally gynocentric, as in by default white knighting and/or supporting females and female interests is the standard of a civilization. There's reasons for this, but that's more involved than I want to get into here, and its likely you know anyway. With that said, I consider the black community in America specifically as matriarchal.

Nobody else has the vast majority of its men raised by women, to be women. Overly emotional black men is not a stereotype, its the norm. Black men are on the bottom of the socioeconomic totem pole, not because they failed somewhere on a individual level, but because some "other" is keeping them there. This view is held by the majority of the men, and its also the viewpoint of women, at nearly times. When a black man breaks out, he's shunned and shamed, no different than a female gets shamed for keeping a decent body weight immediately after a pregnancy. I can go on forever on how black men, generally speaking, are indistinguishable from females in their conclusions and lines of thought, which is unsurprising considering the parental circumstances of, what, 80% of them?

This sort of thing doesn't happen with such severity in other racial communities. Not to say that white knighting, pussy pedestalizing/begging, and simply not understanding the nature of females doesn't happen a majority of the time in any other racial demo, but in the black community it's basically extremist level nonsense.

[–]Absinthe99 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Yeah, considering how the black community is a matriarchy, and the men are generally subordinate, I don't know how anyone can produce a claim of alphaness anywhere in there.

Depends on one's definition of "alphaness". Apparently this dude thinks "alpha" is defined solely on notch count, the number of different holes someone has managed to insert their dick into (or possibly the number of different baby mammas he's managed to impregnate).

It's not exactly an uncommon view (in fact there are probably plenty here in TRP that think in a similar fashion).

I've run into it several times, where some guy (generally twentysomething, and ethnicity doesn't matter here) thinks he's "the Man" -- i.e. all dominant/alpha -- based SOLELY on the number of holes he's splooged in, and possibly the fact that he's gotten a couple of bar-slut-hoes pregnant. His "alpha" self esteem is then centered around the fact that when he does pop around to visit her (and his/her crotch-spawn), she waits on him hand and foot, gives BJ's and wants kinky sex...

To those types, well, they focus on that because it's all they have... in ALL other regards they're complete losers: homeless (not even an apartment) parasite that bounces around from sofa to sofa probably even sleeping under overpasses occasionally (not to mention the occasional stint in a jail cell, and eventually prison); no vehicle (not even a rusty shitbox) and so constantly bumming or thumbing rides; no job much less any "career" or business (unless you count selling drugs on the street, and occasionally resorting to some combination of panhandling, petty theft, and in general mooching as a business or career).

That there is anything ELSE more to being "alpha" -- well those types just don't see it -- or rather they do see it, but focus on the superficial stuff; the "bling" status symbol things (which they generally drool over) of fancy clothes & cars, big houses, and so on.

Generally speaking they are actually more like hen-pecked "betas" -- no future, no REAL "dominance", no plan for life, etc. -- and their "dominance" in some slut's bedroom is essentially on the WOMAN'S terms... but they don't comprehend that (too threatening to the psyche).

[–]TK-85 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Depends on one's definition of "alphaness". Apparently this dude thinks "alpha" is defined solely on notch count

Honestly, I've butted heads with populare producers over this. Their point being that soandso celebrity is alpha because he bangs a lot chicks. Apparently they are ignoring the elephant of the room, which is that females are attracted to resources and status with the same intensity that males are attracted to youth and beauty. Not to be critical on the men who do this, but any guy who lives on his couch, jerking off to Victoria's Secret catalogs can be an Alpha by that simple standard by winning a damn lottery. I would certainly congratulate that particular man, or any man who has a massive notch count, but I'm definitely not going to come to an assumption that they are anymore Alpha than the standard mangina without seeing how the live and how they operate.

[–]Absinthe99 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Their point being that soandso celebrity is alpha because he bangs a lot chicks. Apparently they are ignoring the elephant of the room, which is that females are attracted to resources and status with the same intensity that males are attracted to youth and beauty.

Bingo. Many of those guys are in effect non-alpha "lottery winners" -- their status & wealth often more one of luck than real merit (basically someone else figured out a way to use them to make even more money than they get) -- and what little they do have is generally short lived to boot (as they themselves frequently end up being)... because it gets squandered on bling and partying (which is the other attraction to many girls who like booze & drugs, etc and "just wanna have fun").

any guy who lives on his couch, jerking off to Victoria's Secret catalogs can be an Alpha by that simple standard by winning a damn lottery.

Actually he doesn't even have to win the lottery.

All he really needs to do is lower his standards in terms of what women he's willing to fuck -- there are plenty of desperate hoes out there -- and then approach enough of them at various trashy bars and other places those types gather. Banging a half dozen of those in any given year is no special talent, and getting one or more of them pregnant is more a sign of stupidity than anything else.

The guys I was talking about -- no home, no car, no job, no prospects, etc -- well the women they were so proud of having bagged & impregnated... were pretty much the "scrape the bottom of the barrel" types. (We're talking the "single mom" who already has 2 or 3 different mixed race kids -- and who is living with her own mother, and working some shit job at a liquor store or bar or graveyard shift at a grocery... I mean we're not talking about "prime catch" here; more like the people in the "Shameless" TV series {take your pick, the US or the UK version} -- where the women see yet another kid as in part just a means to access more government "benefits".)

[–]IGoYouStayTwoAutumns 2 points3 points  (0 children)

THE GOLDEN RULE: YOU DO NOT HAVE TO PROTECT A WOMAN FROM HERSELF.

"If she tells you she wants a long term relationship but then sleeps with you anyway, as long as you have told her (even just one time) that you do NOT want a relationship, you are in the clear. A woman’s ideal might be a long term relationship, that does not mean she might not let go of that ideal for a good fuck in the moment."

This from Robert Glover's (NO MORE MR NICE GUY) podcast on "Being an Integrated Man Whore" (highly recommended, as are all of his podcasts). Really had trouble with this one pre-TRP (felt guilty for leading my plates on etc), post-TRP: I can't imagine any other way to live.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am kind of worried about her and I really don't want her to do anything crazy in my place.

In my place

That answers that mysterious question.

[–]pcadrian 12 points12 points [recovered]

There are different types of alpha. Our guy sounds like the wolf type. See this article

http://theredpillroom.blogspot.com/2012/12/the-three-alphas.html

[–]MazeMouse 7 points8 points  (0 children)

So he is a human being with a modicum of empathy for another person who is having a tough time in life.
But the moment he explains why she isn't relationship material for his tastes he's a monster.

[–]1commentatorX 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Maybe I'm just jaded cause I 'got out' but seriously, most men in the black community aren't "alpha as fuck". That demographic is full of posturing and pretending - aggression doesn't always mean alpha. Lot of scared little boys pretending to be men in every hood..

[–]GoldPisseR 13 points13 points [recovered]

These are the kind of broken girls left to marry.Again, if you ever get married, the girl better be a conservative young virgin.

Look at the comments there, seems like the situation resonates with a lot of those whores.

[–]1London-Bananas 13 points14 points  (16 children)

Don't hamster. I'm all for the conservative young virgin but there's still no reason to marry her. If she won't be with you without a marriage contract she was in it for the contract and not for you.

[–]John_E_Vegas 5 points6 points  (8 children)

No. This is false.

I'm a Red Piller who got married young to a virgin. We've been together for 22 years now, and a couple years back I realized I'd become Blue Pill after playing the field in college. Of course, back then getting married was the goal for most guys, and I finally found a hottie with virtues.

Fast forward 20 years and I slap some red pill on her, suddenly having the hottest sex of our marriage.

And I have a young daughter. How do YOU think I'm gonna raise her?

If you had a daughter, how would you teach her to navigate this extremely treacherous minefield?

I'm teaching my daughter to keep her legs together, and only settle for a guy with similar values. Not you fuckers. ;)

[–]fucking_killYOURSELF 5 points6 points  (6 children)

You got married 20 years ago, you don't know jack shit about today's climate. Conservative christians are the greatest whores of our generation.

slap some red pill on her, suddenly having the hottest sex of our marriage.

you are 40+ years old and your SMV has gone up while hers has declined steadily. Of course a 40+ year old woman is going to light up to you, nobody else has shown they want to fuck her nearly as much as when she was "thin and pretty" in her 20's.

And I have a young daughter. How do YOU think I'm gonna raise her?

probably just as well as any other father has, and look at all that has done. Accept reality and do what you can. Do you really think you're going to steer her away from guys like us, or do you think your efforts will push her towards us? I'm thinking it's the latter.

I'm teaching my daughter to keep her legs together, and only settle for a guy with similar values. Not you fuckers. ;)

Because I'm sure that most dads tell their daughters to go fuck half the city.

You are really goddamn naive.

[–]GoldPisseR 6 points7 points  (4 children)

You think too highly of yourself man. Stop being an ass to that guy.

He's happy and getting his dick sucked,why rain on his parade?You don't think 40 yr old women are capable of having sex with alphas?Unless his wife is bitch ugly ,she can easily cheat on him.

And if his daughter actually respects him ,she'll listen.

Just because you've surrounded yourself with total damaged whores doesn't mean there aren't other girls that can't be saved .There are still chicks who marry their first partners, believe it or not.

[–]GoldPisseR 2 points2 points [recovered]

CC ridden career women wanting to marry doesn't make sense ,but if a girl is a virgin in her prime its only due to her traditional beliefs.

I admire that because there are alphas hitting on her left and right but she's sticking to her values.I am willing to budge a little for that kind of a girl

[–]1London-Bananas 10 points11 points  (3 children)

its only due to her traditional beliefs.

IDGAF about her traditional beliefs. I'll take what benefits me (low partner count, loyalty) and reject the bullshit (marriage).

I am willing to budge a little for that kind of a girl

Signing off your livelihood to the whims of a woman is more than budging a little. But yeah it's your funural.

[–]cariboo_j 2 points3 points  (1 child)

The marriage contract is fundamentally unfair to men. When you sign it, you're trusting her not to fuck you over. The ball is in her court, whether you like it or not.

Why would you sign away rights to your finances then hope that the other party isn't going to take advantage of you? That's just silly.

[–]GoldPisseR 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Read my parent comment man .I said 'IF'.

I ve seen people against marriage getting married due to fear of being left an outcast.

Majority still marries.Unless this changes you can't disregard the psychological pressure of marriage.

[–]Sdom1 2 points3 points  (1 child)

That girl is just stupid. If you want a family, you should take actions consistent with that goal. Don't do things guaranteed to NOT get you where you want to go and then freak out.

If she wanted a family she should be looking for a man that she is attracted to and gets along with who is on the same page as her in terms of the life she wants to lead. In other words, find a guy that wants a family and isn't a bum, who you have compatibility with. It's not hard, it's really not.

[–]thredditsowaway 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The whole issue hinges on the double standard: a sexless marriage (commitment without sex) is socially kosher, but sex without commitment is "using her." This is the feminist morality.

A benevolent person is one who seeks to do good and avoids harming others. This poster isn't necessarily benevolent or malevolent because he doesn't see what he's doing as harmful, and he doesn't see offering commitment to her as particularly good or noble. Those attributes to sex/commitment are assigned by the feminist morality, which he rejected. In his mind, he wants what he wants, and she wants what she wants, and from the sound of the post he made his intent pretty clear and she accepted what he was offering. There isn't anything wrong here, it's not any more complicated than that.

This guy is just a natural alpha. Because most of us come from a BP upbringing, we seem to have the impression that "alpha" men believe that what they're doing is harmful, but do it anyways. In fact, most of the natural alphas I know really care for the well-being of the girls they game, and have simply rejected feminist moral systems that say "sex without commitment is bad." The response to this kind of problem is often some variation of "nice girl, but she just couldn't handle the casual-relationship sort of thing." No more to it than that.

Basically I argue that most actual alphas are benevolent on some level, we just think they aren't because we haven't fully ditched our BP morality yet.

[–]CNileDotA 2 points3 points  (0 children)

For me I find sex fun so basically a girl that isn't ugly and semi attractive will do for me. for a girl to be my girlfriend, I would want her to be a good bit prettier, have a good personality, a good background etc. Kelly right now is good for a fwb but if I was looking for a girlfriend, I'd want her to be younger, have less baggage, and prettier.

To which some cunt replied:

Oh my god break up with her on Saturday. Do not sleep with her on Saturday. Go no contact after Saturday. Please.

To which someone else replied:

Man had standards, call the police .

The second one had 85 upvotes. The one directly above is sitting pretty at -26.

You can't make this shit up.

[–]NakedAndBehindYou 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Entire comment section is full of white knight faggots blaming OP for the girl's hurt emotions, conveniently ignoring the fact that she is 100% responsible for her own decision to continue sleeping with him.

[–]nantucketghost 2 points3 points  (0 children)

deleted What is this?

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorVasiliyZaitzev 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I had a submissive plate who used to refer to me as a "loving Dominant". By which she meant I was kind to her (my first reaction was "This chick doesn't think I love her, does she?")

What she meant of course, was benevolent.

As another example, when I was 31, my then g/f (although today she would be classified more as a 'friend with benefits') was 22. I was introduced to her by my buddy's g/f at a party the night before they graduated from college. Anyway, she was with me when she got her first job, so I explained her benefit package to her, and told her to what to get, and also to sign up for her 401k, b/c she was used to being broke and she would never miss the money. I also had her open an IRA. So wherever she is now, she should be sitting on pile of cash being very grateful for all the times she sucked my dick. (Whether she is or not, I couldn't care less, of course, but so it goes. She was convenient at the time.)

When she got rear-ended by some high-off-his-meds loser, and was totally stressed out about dealing with his insurance copany, so I handled it for her (I took her along, so she would learn for when I wasn't fucking her anymore).

It's ok to be kind from time to time; done properly, it's not going to damage your frame, just like indulging a girl periodically on comfort tests. It may well enhance it (again, done properly). Just don't slip into "Billy Beta" mode.

You're not boyfriend material, bud.

This is a form of "pre-emptive rejection". The commenter knows she would be little more than a cum dumpster for the poster--likely that is her role in her IRL relationships--thus she "rejects" him online, before he can "reject" here. It's about her psychological survival.

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Is a 'benevolent' alpha something that's possible?

On Married Red Pill we coined the term "Family Alpha" to identify the Captain who is in charge of his family. Alpha is not 'good' or 'bad' it just is. An Alpha can be benevolent or a dick and it doesn't impact his level of Alpha.

Benevolent Alphas are rare because that behavior is not rewarded by empowered modern women. Our break down girl would not have fucked the guy in the first place if he had tried to treat her like a girlfriend princess. He treated her like a plate because that is what she is.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Fuck relationships and its shitty, obviously-biased advice. If the roles were reversed, do you think for a second that the OP would be so heavily downvoted?

Nothing OP did was wrong in any way. They both knew the deal - drama free friends with benefits.

Girl brings drama and somehow it's the fault of the man. So typical of relationships, yet still as dirty as the first time I experienced their blatant bias towards women. And hell, it goes past fault. Now it's the man's responsibility to fix the woman's problems!

So here's the real talk. relationships is a sexist place that gives horrible advice to both men and women alike. Nobody in that thread recommended for the woman to maybe improve her value beyond sex. Nobody recommended that perhaps she try harder to get what she wants. Nobody in that entire wasteland of a subreddit wants to accept that perhaps men have options and don't have to treat a girl who is wasting her life sucking dick (her words, not mine) like a princess. Because she isn't.

You know who I'll treat like a princess? A woman who has all the traits of a princess. Not some cumslut who agreed to a drama free relationship TWO YEARS AGO and wants to change things up now that she realizes that she won't be able to worm her way through my boundaries.

And then the audacity of the women and beta males on that sub, to give someone shit for having different standards when it comes to having sex with them versus committing to them. I mean, any fucking idiot with half a brain could realize that these two scenarios are vastly different, and therefore, should have different requirements.

But that doesn't "feeeeeeeeeeeeel" good, so we have to go against biology, logic, common sense, and reality to accommodate these weak cunts.

Fuck that, fuck the relationships sub, fuck beta males, fuck bitches, get money.

Edit: Fuck you I'm not done yet.

This is why I can't respect 99.99999% of humans. Not just women. Okay, mostly it's women, because they're the ones who walk around acting like respect is owed to them because they have a fucking gash between their legs. You never see a beta walking around acting like the world is owe to him. He fucking lies down because he knows he isn't owed shit. But if you do ever run across these types, it's super easy to put them in check. And we do that, because beta males aren't owed a goddamn fucking thing in this society.

Women aren't either. You want to be respected? Be someone worth respecting. Until you demonstrate that you have value outside of your vagina, you will be treated like a walking vagina. No, I won't be rude to you. No, I won't tell you to your face that your value is derived only from your pussy. But I know it's true, and I won't be giving you a goddamn thing. Because see, I'm not a desperate cunt. Even if I was, I'd much prefer to be alone than to try to please such an insatiable creature as the "empowered" woman. Nothing you do is ever enough for them. In the example in the OP, having a good enough relationship where you can cook together, share a meal, and share some intimacy isn't good enough for our little cumslut. My question is, what the fuck is good enough these days?

You know what's good enough for me? A woman who wants to fuck a few times a week, can carry a conversation well enough, and has her own life outside of me.

That's it.

But you could give a woman literally everything she asks for, and it isn't enough. Why? Because they don't know what the fuck they want. And that is why I'll never "respect" women in the same way that I respect my fellow man. Because my amount of respect for a person is directly linked to how well they understand and play the game of life. And if you want to play any game well, you need a strategy, right? You don't win a game of chess by making random ass moves. Likewise, you don't succeed in any area of life without at least some planning.

The girl in the story in the OP is not someone who would ever have my respect. Most women are people who will never have my respect. The problem with the word "respect" is that people like to change its meaning. People confuse respect with "politeness" and "courtesy." Which any decent human extends to all of his fellow mankind. But respect is different.

Respect is earned.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am 99% certain this is trolling.

It just seems somewhat unbelievable and contrived that this guy would fret about this girl's feelings to the point where he posts about it on the relationships subreddit.

Who the hell has time for that? Isn't he supposed to be an busy urban professional?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If she wants a BB there's 70% of the male population to choose from. Fuck her with that nonsense.

[–]tripwire1 1 point2 points  (0 children)

her sister has a family, and she is wasting away her life sucking dick and a bunch of other stuff

Wait is she saying that once she locks a guy down she's going to stop sucking his dick?

[–]Freiling 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Look no further than the black community. A generation of boys growing up fatherless has led to increased crime and incarceration rates, and higher rates of teen mothers than other minorities in America. However, the majority of them aren't betas, they don't follow the 20/80 principle, the vast majority of them are alpha as fuck.

I'm interested to hear more of what you mean about this. I don't know much about black culture, but I find the comparative approach routinely enlightening. If I have to nitpick, I would say that there's been far more than one generation of black children forced to grow up without fathers. But that's a whole can of worms.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I love the part where the chick says the guy who has a girl lock herself in his bathroom begging him to be her boyfriend is "not boyfriend material". Hamster to the rescue.

[–]mrmeyhemn 1 point2 points  (1 child)

again, woman thinks men are machines that they can put sex into and get a relationship out of, when are they going to learn....

[–]AK27ABROAD 2 points2 points [recovered]

Hahaha WOW. I 100% identify with this guy. Everything he's said about caring resonates with me. And I DO NOT think it makes me less alpha or less red pill. There's a fine line- trying to rescue a girl or going out of your way (messing with your own life) to make her life better? Ok, blue pill mangina stuff. But trying not to hurt other people? I'd do as much for a dog, why not for a woman? I'm not angry at all woman-kind. They're people. After putting your dick in something for 2 years it's natural to have some concern for them as human beings. Just because a human has made mistakes (ridden the cock carousel, for example) doesn't mean I actively want to hurt them and yes, I'm willing to put myself out a little to NOT hurt them.

That's natural human decency, and it DOESN'T fly in the face of being red pill. To have concern for other living things is a fine quality to have.

Anyways this is the shit that puts me off red pill sometimes. Being alpha doesn't mean not caring for other people. It simply means that you don't bend over backwards PRETENDING to care because you're fucking afraid no one will love you if you're honest about not caring. jesus.

[–]IronMeltsinmyHands 1 point2 points  (0 children)

fuckin betas and blind feminazis giving cookie cutter responses nothing's changed.

[–]ilovesunfires 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Found this comment by Chad and couldn't stop laughing.

Most of the girls I know will flat out not date a guy that isn't taller than 6ft, and even more that won't but won't mention it. Why can't I have things I am attracted to lol?

One of the only upvoted comments by Chad lol, I like how none of the feminists even try to deny this claim haha

[–]HAMMURABl 1 point2 points  (1 child)

its funny about the age thing: i am nearing my thirties and sometimes people suggest me to date some mutual acquaintances. the looks i get when i tell them im not interested in dating anyone over 25 are hilarious.

[–]omanisherin 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Regarding: " is a benevolent alpha possible?": Alpha does as Alpha wants.

I have found as I have gotten older, that every relationship (business or personal) is better when both parties are in a win/win condition. Relationships that end poorly (or perceived betrayal) have a way of coming back and biting you. Being aware of Machiavellian principals and the laws of power is exceedingly important, but being hyper manipulative can be exhausting if you are not born to it.

If you are an alpha that is not dark-triad leaning, hurting your lovers feelings, especially without intent, is sloppy, and is probably something you avoid. Every relationship should end on a good note if possible. Especially in communities where bad romantic endings may affect your professional reputation.

The original poster's (the alpha in the quoted article) problem is that he doesn't understand his plate. She is the gatekeeper of sex, he is the gatekeeper of commitment. He is assuming she's strictly in it for the sex because she is a FWB, and doesn't understand all of the social prestige her sister gets from being married. By giving him sex without commitment she is not being true to her basic nature, and that end's poorly for her. This is a predictable outcome, even if she doesn't understand it herself.

She is sobbing in the bathroom because she is realizing that her lifestyle and behavior are not fulfilling for her and she is profoundly unhappy. Hooray for modern feminism.

SUMMARY: Alpha's can be benevolent or anything else they want, and OP is right to not commit to his plate. But he should read the side-bar so he understands what makes her tick.

[–]1sardinemanR 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Being independent means you are responsible for your own decisions and actions.

There has never been a society on Earth that has actually oppressed women.

But successful societies have given women protections and kept them in roles they could handle. That meant having a father or brother that would vet out potential partners for her, her place being the home and not her working, and women marrying young (15-16 to seriously start looking or get married by).

It is the height of fallacy to think women can actually properly make decisions, have authority or responsibility, or manage their own decisions in terms of sex and partner selection. They are simply incapable of those things. It is also rather idiotic to have women waste their prime years and give away the only asset they have, with the belief that men can be shamed into dealing with them after the damage is already done. Some men will do it, but they are low quality men that themselves are extremely damaged and women want nothing to do with really.

I have no interest in a contract with the state or wasting time with a damaged woman. A young virgin can make a good marriage partner, but all other women are only good for sex and nothing more.

[–]Dustin_Bromain 5 points6 points  (6 children)

I think that being a "benevolent" alpha is on a slippery slope to becoming a "tamed" alpha. Which are guys who aren't fully beta but for some reason decided to settle down and commit to one chick. Which then quickly leads to becoming beta. All in all, not good.

[–]ferengiprophet 29 points30 points  (3 children)

Not really. I have come across benevolent alphas before and they're great to be around. They're at the top of their game and treat people well, resulting in them getting more favors and respect from the people around them.

[–]Endorsed ContributorHarleyWalker 42 points43 points  (1 child)

Too many on here caught up in the label and this dark triad shit to realise real alphas do what they want not what they think an alpha will do.

[–]2IVIaskerade 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Too many people get caught up in power fantasies and don't realise that true Dark Triad personalities are not people you want to be around.

Just like the FWB who thinks she's different, she can make Chad commit, they think that they won't be used and discarded by the Triad.

Such hamstering is common, but like all hamstering, ultimately just wishful thinking.

[–]TheIceReaver 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Yeah these people are great to be around.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I suppose it depends on how far you want to take it. I consider myself benevolent enough. I do my best to speak the truth, treat others with the dignity that is due them (which it seems like Chad from the OP has gone above and beyond in doing with the young lady), and for the most part I do my best to improve the lives of those around me.

However, the only reason I am able to act in such a way is because I have thunderbolts ready to throw the second that someone steps out of line and takes advantage of me. I believe it's fully possible to be benevolent and also maintain your boundaries and self respect.

Si vis pacem, para bellum.

[–]riverraider69 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The question comes up though, is a benevolent alpha possible? And why are they so rare?

In a time and place where most women behave like ladies, it's only proper to behave like a gentleman yourself. If you try to do this in current western world, you're likely to be taken advantage of or mistaken for a pussy.

This doesn't make being a good guy something inherently wrong, but it means that it's much harder to pull off. It take a higher level of alpha to be a benevolent alpha than to be a jerk, in those societies.

Mark Manson has a similar concept, being "authentic", which is more difficult and efficient than simply "acting alpha". He also speaks of self-selection: being a selective gentleman gives you a greater change of ending up with a higher quality woman, because relationships with worse women will fail one way or another.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (17 children)

Think of it in D and D terms. A white knight is Lawful Good (adheres to the "rules"). A benevolent alpha would be Chaotic Good. I think we are Chaotic Evil. It is not necessarily that we are evil, just that we are perceived as such because of blue pillers.

But you know what? I am good with being Chaotic Evil. I enjoy being the bad guy.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think this is a perfect example of why "alpha" and "beta" should not been used to describe categories of people but rather types of behaviours (as rollo suggests). Man uses "alpha" behaviours on his FWB and then empathy kicks in as the girl breaks down. End of story. What's the problem?

But no, since we insist so much at categorising men as either beta or alpha, we get stuck in endless debates as to whether this particularly fine example of a Man Has suddenly "become a beta" or if there is such a thing as a new "benevolent alpha" category.

[–]peacewhale 1 point2 points  (2 children)

When she pushes for the 'Why', how do you explain that she doesn't make the LTR cut? Would presumably include some harsh realities about her personality.

[–]zeny_two 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There are a few options. Let her down gently by saying you're not looking for a relationship right now, let her down hard by telling her she doesn't make the cut, or avoid being trapped by giving her the ol' next

[–]yummyluckycharms 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can be a benevolent alpha without being cruel, and I dont think they are rare. Most people with long term plates are benevolent

This guy could've just cut short all of the drama by saying - "I wasnt ready to be in a long term relationship with her, and she is free to leave whenever she wanted. If she wants to stay, that's her choice."

Pretty hard to spin that in a negative way

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

WOW! This post hit close to home for many reasons which I am not going to list here.

What really makes me think is the Lack of agency: when convenient women rally together, a woman is strong and capable of making decisions, choices in life etc; a point of view that I, as a modern male, fully support. I supported it when I was an AFC, then when I was a BP/BB, and even now when I am Rep Pill. And yet then women rally that He should leave her since it's not fair to her and similar garbage. Isn't this the same strong woman who makes decisions on her own? So if she decides to continue a FWB thingy with this guy, how is his responsibility to dump her since it's not good for her?

Freedom of choice is wonderful, we all make choices. When I was an AFC I was good enough for women to cry on my shoulders about their boyfriends who treated them like crap but I was not good enough for boyfriend material. Later on when I was BP/BB I was good enough to date and go out to dinner but not good enough to fuck NSA.

Guess what? After a while I stopped complaining and changed, and boy I have changed. And I have to thank you TRP for being the catalyst of my change, change for the better.

[–]Rougepellet 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Because when don't like having accountability and responsibility for their own choices, yet they want to be treated as adults

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Point her to reddit's RPW and hope she figures her shit out?

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