Summary: Guy in relationships subreddit finds his girlfriend's social media account, learns that she was one of Chad's plates but he wouldn't commit to her so she settled for OP instead. So he goes to his older female cousin for advice and she drops RP truths on him. He then decides to dump his girlfriend.
Every once in a while in the relationships subreddit, you find a thread where somebody starts to awaken to Red Pill truths. This is one of those.
My girlfriend and I have been together since January 2013. Overall we have a pretty happy relationship. We recently moved in to my apartment 4 months ago, we split the rent.
So a couple days ago my cousin wanted to see pictures of my me and my girlfriend. I don’t have an Instagram so I was googling her username to find a link to her profile. I ended up seeing that she was a member on a website (not mentioning what). I got curious and started reading through the posts and that’s where I found out a ton of things, some relating to sex, some relating to stuff about her mom.
To give you the gist of it, before she met me there was this guy that she was seeing she was bragging about how she confirmed that tall guys are “proportional”. She said they had crazy sex, couldn’t get enough, lost track of orgasms and how she was hooked, and she really wanted to date this guy but he didn’t want anything serious.
It's a story we've all heard many times. Guy digs into his girlfriend's past, and finds out that she used to get deep-dicked on a regular basis by a tall, jacked alpha. She wanted him as her boyfriend, but she was never anything more than a fuck buddy to him.
And lo and behold I come in. While we were dating I asked her to be my girlfriend (she told me she needed time because she takes commitment seriously),she actually gave this other guy an ultimatum that if he didn’t date her, she would leave me for him. Guy turned her down and then she starts seeing me, so yeah I was my girlfriend’s second choice. Oh and she wanted advice on how to do anal with his big dick, however when I have slightly brought it up she tells me that her butt is exit only.
Rollo's essay "Saving the Best" covered this very well. A woman will allow an alpha to have dirty, pornstar-style sex with her because she wants to keep him interested (and because he gives her 'gina tingles). With a beta, however, sex becomes a chore or a reward for good behavior.
Now we are here. Reading this stuff made me absolutely sick. I love her so much and to be reading this shit, just ruins me. When we started dating I legitimately thought this was my girl, all the while she was hoping that the other guy would date her. I haven’t talked to her about this yet since I honestly have no idea how I can have this conversation while holding it together. I feel so stupid. Please r.relationships what do I do next.
Ah yes, the sickening realization that you were not her first choice. This feeling has driven many men to discover the Red Pill.
The next post is an update to the situation.
I ended up reaching out to my older cousin, she is like a relationship guru among my friends. I told her the situation she was familiar with this because she knew of women in similar situation.
She described guys like cars, some are safe and reliable, some are fast and fun. My girlfriend found a car that she couldn't afford, (the other guy was out of her league), she got to test-drive with him but couldn't keep him. So then she got with me, a good car, but not the flashy/fast one, while I get the job done as in, I am not nearly as fun as the other car. And as a result, she really won't appreciated me. Just like a guy who used to drive Mustangs(fast sports car) when he was younger, isn't going to be thrilled about a minivan. Sure he will drive it around for years, maybe the for the rest of his life, but the appeal won't be the same.
It made a lot of sense to me and I thanked my cousin for it. She told me that my girlfriend did nothing wrong and she isn't a bad person, however its not really in my best interest to stay.
As the old saying goes "When the student is ready, the teacher will appear." This guy's cousin possesses more honesty and self-awareness than the vast majority of women. She basically told him that some men are alphas, and some men are betas, and he just doesn't excite her as much as her alpha ex. Most women would give him bullshit advice like "You shouldn't judge her because of her past" or "The only thing that matters is that she's with you now."
I talked to my girlfriend about it, I told her about the username thing and that I read what she wrote and that I don't see myself with her. She cried a lot, and begged me to stay and reconsider. I told her that I want to find a girl that finds me as exciting as she found the other dude. She told me that she had a deeper love for me, than the other dude. I told her that while I want that deep love, I want that excitement and energy too. It was sad to break up with her, and I wish her the best.
By listening to his cousin's advice and doing the hard thing, this guy is taking his first steps towards alpha-ness. A lot of men would have decided that they could "live with it" and would have stayed with her until she found another alpha to start fucking. And of course his girlfriend cried; she's approaching the wall (she's 28 years old) and she just lost her beta provider.
Of course, the comments section has several women and white knights telling him that he made a mistake by dumping her. But some of the most upvoted comments are ones telling him that he did the right thing and he deserves better than being somebody's backup plan.
EDIT: Now with archived link.