Summary: In the long run, women have it way harder than men in heterosexual relationships, because relative to the committment they (should) seek, sex is easy to obtain. Commitment must truly be earned, and this makes men the real prize.
Let's say you walk into a store. You're generally minding your own business, when a hard 6 catches your eye. Walks up to you, and starts flirting, making it obvious that she wants you to take her home. Whatever, you may think. Gotta be some kind of trap, right? Logistically, you'd want to put in as little effort as needed, have it be as no-strings-attached as possible. Unless it's good, but she'll never just fuck you and that's it, will she? That doesn't even happen.
Then she tells you:
"You can just drop me wherever you want when you're done with me. And it's up to you to call me if you want to play again."
Well...hell yeah, right? As you shrug, smirk, and load her into your car, you wonder: are there more like her at that store? Cause you could get used to this—take three, maybe four girls a week home just to play with, no questions asked. And if you could turn those 6s into 7s, what else could you really ask for?
Nothing. Even the most commitment-minded man would be a damn fool to turn down steady, effortless sex with decent-looking women, in the pursuit instead of 9s and 10s, or that unicorn he can take home and keep forever.
But girls? They're really more interested in the prize. And what is that prize for girls?
An alpha man willing to commit to and provide for her. Gentlemen, this prize takes a hell of a lot longer
to get than 10 minutes of decent sex.
Remember Cracker Jack? The caramel candy popcorn boxes with the little prize at the bottom? Well think about heterosexual relationships this way. Boys are perfectly content to fumble around with our stubby fingers to eventually get a good box open, and plunge right into that sweetness. A worthy prize would be nice and all, but that sweet candy is more than enough for us. And yeah, "The More You Eat The More You Want".
Well, as easy as it is for girls to open up a box of Cracker Jack with their long nails, they have to root around for what they really want—the prize at the bottom. Of course, they like candy too, and they can sure get it any time they want. But they can't handle the sweetness like boys can. Some girls think they can play our game, and not notice that their pretty little nails are getting whittled down, little by little, from tearing into box after box of Cracker Jack, not even thinking to root around for what they really need. Hell, there was a 24-karat gold diamond ring at the bottom of some of the first few boxes, but the candy...that candy was just so good, and it's so easy for girls to open these boxes, and just gorge and gorge...
Men: you are the prize. Remember that shiny new toy you begged your mom to buy you at Toys R Us? The one she'd get you if you'd been "good"? The one you played with for three, maybe four days before getting bored and breaking out your Legos again, or pining for a newer, shinier toy? That's sex. That's what sex is. The toys you long for today are a bit bigger, don't come with an instruction manual, and, ironically, if you're "good" (game), look a hell of a lot like the Barbie dolls you wouldn't have been caught dead with when you were a kid.
But they're toys. Playthings. You could win your prize, take her home, and play with her all night. Then you could play with her first thing in the morning, before breakfast. Drop her on the floor of your bedroom. But then, you could get up. Leave her there, facedown, limbs bent in some awkward position while you pour yourself a bowl of Cheerios. You could tire of her real quick—but you won already. You got her prize. You could end the game right there with her, and tonight you could bring home the Asian Barbie, with the glasses and the long shiny black hair, and hardly give a thought to where you left your "old" toy.
Girls don't play like that. Girls can't play like that. They only win when they get you to stop going to toystores. When they start getting you to buy her accessories, and the dream house, and the fancy car. You know how long that takes? To root around in that box of sticky Cracker Jacks? They don't get to
get tired of the boys they want to play with.
They can't play like we play, because they have to play for keeps (carousel be damned, of course). So why get jealous that some HB8 can bat her eyes at any dude in a night club and be sprawled on his floor thirty minutes later? Congrats on raising your n-count, Heather. Call me when you can hang on to a prize for longer than a few weeks or months...which becomes harder and harder the more you destroy your ability to pairbond by being promiscuous.
Think about it. If we could root around in a box of Cracker Jack and somehow pull out a miracle HB10 prize, would we really feel the need open other boxes? Most of us wouldn't. But implied here is that this prize won't up and walk away. Hell—knock it down to HB8. We wouldn't commit to an HB8 who is going to be faithful to us? We sure as hell would.
But girls don't think like that. A girl doesn't try to get Chad CrackerCock to commit to her when she first gets those lovely nails in him, even though she should be. She should be working on her "marriage material" value, like learning to be a good cook, engaging with her man on topics that interest him, demonstrating sweet child raising qualities. But a lot of girls don't do that or have to do that, because they look damn good in those yoga pants. And they'll try to play the man's game because that candy is so easy for them to access, and the rest of that candy looks real good right about now, just another taste...
Again, getting laid is relatively easy. Our real challenge as men, should we choose to accept it, is to get the HB8s to be faithful throughout the sex. Essentially TRP on hard mode—a real, long-term relationship. Difficult, but possible. But what's our consolation prize should thoughts of commitment not pan out, or ever even be on the table? Decent sex with an HB8. Take it or leave it, "it was just your turn", whatever you wanna call it.
So while a guy like me may be more commitment-minded than most, I have realized that guys actually have it so, SO much easier than women in the grand scheme of heterosexual relationships. For the most part, men want sex and women want commitment, right? It's a lot easier for a guy to get decent sex with an HB8 than to get a male 8 to commit to a girl. Commitment takes a looooong time. Who's to say that Mr. Perfect wasn't just playing her up for months and months, just to alpha widow her? What's he committing to? Her looks? How good she's willing to fuck him when his frame and game are tight? Sure, that may be enough for a lot of guys. But what prize is she really offering that Asian Barbie he may run into tonight can't replicate, should she flirt with him? Why should he commit?
The prize a good man has to offer is so much more than looks—it's his whole SMV. His status, his confidence, his money, his social acumen, etc. This is why it is harder for guys to get regular, decent sex with actual attractive women (HB7+). But this is the same exact reason we have the heterosexual relationship game on lockdown. As a guy, the SMV value we look for in women is largely tied to her looks. We can determine just how worthy a "prize" she is in a literal split-second. Girls can't do that. There are tons of guys who have looks like Brad Pitt and are beta as shit. Guys are allowed to fail many times a day and night trying to score.
But consider the girl who enters a relationship with a poseur-alpha, whose façade crumbles over a year into their relationship on some simple shit tests, heaping dust in whatever once-moist cracks of her vagina that had survived the long drought of his betaness. Or the girl whose Chad "isn't really looking for anything serious right now" every single month she tentatively brings it up after blowing him, 20 minutes into chilling and watching Netflix. That's a hell of a lot worse than being rejecting by some HB8. So keep your perspective, men.
And continue to better yourself, and realize that the discrepancy in the value of prizes means that it really is not a big deal if you strike out in some pursuits of banging an attractive girl. Not nearly as big a deal as her not being able, or willing, to lock down an attractive man.
- Don't envy women to whom sex comes easily.
- Never put sex on a pedestal.
Do not envy women to whom sex comes easily. Their real endgame (commitment) is a lot harder to secure than sex. This is also precisely why you should never put sex on a pedestal either. It's easy to get or at least fluke your way into some good sex even as a guy. Even some beta who says the right things to an HB9 in a bar who likes his beard or whatever can take her home and fuck her. Boom, prize won, game won.
But a woman can't even know she's won her game until months later, if not years. And if she plays this game wrong too many times, nobody will really want to play with her anymore.
[all edits are trivial typo- and format-related edits cause im anal]