One of the greatest sources of aggravation and failure for many men, when it comes to marriage and long-term relationships, is our tendency to believe in relationship equity. Most men believe that if they invest their time, energy, and resources into a relationship, then in the future, when they are in need, the other party will be there for them with time, energy, and resources. Essentially, they see relationships like a bank. They invest their money, deposit it in an account, and they later count on being able to withdraw that money.
However, relationships are not banks. They are banquets. You are not investing money for a future return. You are spending money on dinner. That money is gone, and you receive a meal. If you want to eat tomorrow, you spend more money. If the meal sucks or if you’re running out of money, you find other places to eat that offer you more food or better food for less money. If you show up tomorrow with no money, you don’t eat. Even if you’ve been a loyal customer for years.
Women understand this. Most men do not. Men will lament when a woman behaves badly. They will question how she can do this to them. They have been so loyal and invested so much over such a long period of time. How can everything they’ve done over all this time mean so little to her?
All of the time, energy, and resources you invest into women are not money in the bank. They are food you bought for her. Food she has already eaten. Food she has already shit out. Shit she has already flushed down the toilet.
When deciding how to treat you, whether to fuck you tonight, whether to leave you, whether to cheat with a potentially better man, women are not thinking to themselves, “What has he done for me in the past?” They’re not even thinking, “What has he done for me lately?” They’re thinking, “What is he doing for me right now”, or possibly “What is he going to do for me in the future?” She’s already eaten the food you bought yesterday. The only value that meal or any previous meal has to her today is what it indicates about the food you will give her today, and in the future.
To be successful when we interact with women, it is important to speak their language, rather than becoming mired in our own. When you speak to a woman – banter, hint, flirt, and engage – she is looking for what she stands to gain in the future. Not what you’ve done for her already. She doesn’t want to feel like she’s indebted to you for past favors and that she needs to stick with you to pay you back. She wants to feel like she’s getting a great deal by staying with you and that more great things are to come. You need to appear like you’re going places, and like bringing her along would be nearly effortless. Like all she needs to do is convince you to take her hand and pull her.
If you are a valuable man, and you hint to a woman that she has a chance with you, she will be the one spending time, attention, and resources on you, hoping eagerly to convince you to take her where you’re going and share your value with her.
Since a Red Pill post wouldn’t be complete without comparing women to dogs, let's think about what dogs learn from us as we invest in our relationship with them. Every day, at 6:00, you pour food into the dog’s bowl. The dog shows up and wolfs down the food, then looks at you. You do the same thing, every day, at 6:00. You have invested the time, effort, and the cost of the dog food into this relationship with the dog. And what have you gotten? The dog doesn’t bring you the newspaper out of gratitude. It hasn’t even stopped shitting on the carpet. Instead, all the dog does is walk over to the dog dish at 6:00, look at you, and wait to be fed. This is what the dog has learned from your investment into the relationship.
However, if you train the dog by giving it food and treats and petting it when it brings you the newspaper, and swatting its ass with that newspaper when it shits on your carpet, the dog begins to bring you the newspaper spontaneously, hoping for treats. And it stops shitting on the floor.
If you only give the dog treats some of the times it brings you the newspaper, the dog begins to wonder exactly what aspects of the newspaper fetching work to produce the treats. It tries to bring you the newspaper faster and more frequently. It works hard to prove that it’s good enough to get treats from you.
You want your woman to know you have treats. You want her to know that she can earn them – your value is totally within her reach. But you want her to work for your value. And if she starts getting uppity and reminds you about the blowjob she gave you yesterday, speak her language. That’s old news. What’s on the menu tonight?