I'm in fucking tears right now. A woman used the justice system to ruin my life. (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by Oftowerbroleaning

Forgive me if this incoherent, I am weeping as I write this. I am a 24 year old man. I fell into dating an older single mother earlier this year. She cheated on me and when I tried to break up with her she called the cops and said I abused her. The cops arrested me without even asking me if it was true. I was bailed out and given a 60 day protective order to stay away from her. I ignored her countless text, emails, voicemails, handwritten letters left on my trucks windshield for 2 weeks. She told me if I met her she would tell the cops the truth that she made it up. I came over and she gave me to falsely dated letters of confession. We were driving down the road later that night almost to her house in a suburban neighborhood when she, out of nowhere, threw my dog out of my vehicle, jumped out and ran to a random house screaming as if I was trying to rape her. This was right in the middle of a civil discussion, completely by surprise. The cops arrested me again for violating the protective order. Jail again. My state appointed attorney told me to accept the plea deal. 8 years probation, 250 hours of community service etc, and that I'd have 30 days to change my mind and think about it. He lied. I had 30 days to appeal and the judge has to decide if I can get my day in court. Hired good attorney for 7500 dollars to appeal. Judge takes it under consideration for 2 weeks and I get a call not 2 hours ago saying the motion is denied. I have a mountain of evidence showing I'm innocent. I am an army veteran with no prior criminal record from a good relatively wealthy family. I had a good future in front of me. I don't know where I am going with this. I just had to get this off of my heart. I have a felony on my record now and my future is ruined without ever even having a day in court. I don't know what to do.

[–]sirZofSwagger 247 points248 points  (10 children)

I am going to suggest something crazy, but hear me out. I think you should contact an animal rights group about what she did to your dog. This could potentially get the "pussy pass" on your side, women love animals. You need to press charges for the animals suffering, as any criminal charges will help in a civil suit. Then you civialy sue the hell outta her for everything at once, the dog, and the false claims.

[–]sir_wankalot_here 48 points49 points  (4 children)

Brilliant idea even if it doesn't work. The reason is that it doesn't cost OP anything, so even if it fails he has lost nothing.

[–]Endorsed Contributormonsieurhire2 751 points752 points  (56 children)

As soon as someone puts the law on you, you must sever all ties because that person is your enemy for life.

Additionally, the system doesn't care about the truth; it cares about having fresh meat feed on.

If you do have a bunch of documentary evidence that she made the whole thing up, you'll need to keep working the system until your name is cleared. Hire a private detective if you have to. If your family has money, this shouldn't be as much of an issue than if you were poor.

If you're poor, you simply cannot afford to be this stupid, because this kind of mistake could set off a chain of events that can put you behind prison for life.

[–]1Snivellious 406 points407 points  (42 children)

The best lesson I have ever learned is: if someone involves the law in a matter, never try to de-escalate the amount of law involved.

If someone has their lawyer contact you, you don't answer until it's your lawyer responding (even if the situation is still amicable or business). If someone calls the cops, you embrace them and refuse to deal with the person without a police witness. If someone takes you to court, you countersue instead of trusting their promise to "drop the case".

No matter what the situation, going from a high-law, high-evidence environment to a low-law, low-evidence one is likely to get you into trouble. OP violated a court order (law) on the strength of a personal promise (not law).

I'm not sure I've ever spoken to someone who had previously made a legal threat against me.

[–]Fafner2 183 points184 points  (38 children)

OP violated a court order (law) on the strength of a personal promise (not law).

This is the big thing to note. We are hearing his side of the story, but this is presumably a fact, and reeks of stupidity on OP's side. Makes him look suspicious, and above all makes him a man who violated a court order.

If he had an ounce of dignity or brains, he would've taken any evidence of her trying to entice him for a meetup to his attorney to make his case that much stronger.

[–]babybopp 53 points54 points  (33 children)

I think OP should take his story to the news media. There are huge chances that this woman has done the same shit to other men. Public shaming and Public opinion might also be a way to go and also work out as it will put pressure on the judge. At this stage there are no legal avenues that will be fair towards OP.

[–]2rp_valiant 115 points116 points  (31 children)

the media will always take the woman's side in any case, no matter how sympathetic the man is. Just look at mattress girl. It turned out she lied about the whole ordeal and the media just swept it under the rug.

[–]rpersona 45 points46 points  (23 children)

That bitch that carried her mattress around her campus? That was a lie?

[–]2rp_valiant 96 points97 points  (16 children)

yep, the guy she accused is taking her and the university to court over it. He has evidence of consent through multiple text messages, some of which have been published online. They continued to hook up for weeks after until she decided to cry rape.

Let's be honest, do you know any real rape victims that made a porn tape recreating the supposed rape?

[–]rpersona 19 points20 points  (9 children)

LOL I didn't even know she made a recreation. I didn't follow closely enough. It sounded like a bunch of bull shit.

[–]BowlOfCandy 9 points10 points  (0 children)

The President of the Uni refused to shake her hand when she walked the stage on graduation. There's a video, he manages to "distract" himself taking a sip of water when it's her turn to walk. Funny shit.

If I was an employer I would not hire her.

[–]Eugenics2015 26 points27 points  (7 children)

Yea she made a recreation of it. OMG i fapped so hard to that shit man. Its missionary, you can see her butthole.

I have a major fetish for feminist cunts, but im too smart to fuck em myself

[–]Mintaka7 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I have a major fetish for feminist cunts, but im too smart to fuck em myself

Can't say I've heard that before, be careful.

[–][deleted] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Hitching off the top comment.

OP, take a deep breath. You've already fucked up, and panicking is not going to fix anything. It's not over.

First, stop any contact with this woman now. If she keeps trying to leave notes or call you, get a restraining order against her. Do it the FIRST time she tries. She is made of radioactive poison and must be kept away. In fact, I would try to get an order now. See what your attorney can do. The civil matter is separate from the criminal one, and mutual restraining orders are very common. Courts recognize that two people can be a bad mix even if only one of them gets criminal charges. Get that restraining order.

Second, you're not in prison, so you have a future, just a difficult one. Judge hasn't changed the terms of the plea, correct? So eight years probation makes you 32 when it's over. Barely older than me. Once that comes around, start talking to a lawyer about getting your rights restored and your record cleaned up. If you're careful, you could be free and clear by 34, which is younger than when many men here get divorced and force-fed the pill.

In the meantime it will be difficult getting great employment, but by no means impossible to make a decent living. Resist the temptation to drink or do drugs; find a support group if your emotional state gets too bad (many churches group therapy/support sessions for free, and you can always talk to a priest even if you're not one of the faithful). Be careful to abide by the terms of your probation. State law may have some quirks, so read those on your own in addition to taking advice from your lawyer. Every state makes its statutes freely available to read, so go look it up and write down questions for your lawyer. You're on a computer now, so your probation can't include a prohibition against using the internet. You can still take online college courses, still do online freelance coding, so you can start building a career in computer science without too much trouble.

Take a day to soak it all up, but no more than that. Don't fall into the mental pity-party trap. That's how you end up three years from now, drunk or in prison. Start getting shit together tomorrow no matter how crappy you feel. Stop fucking up your probation right this second, get that woman legally bound to stay out of your life, and get to work making ends meet for the next few years. The first year is the hardest, so if you can beat that, you can beat all of them. Look forward to getting your rights restored at the end. The system is designed for people who fake being reformed, so it will fight you nearly every step, but it is not impossible to overcome.

[–]Endorsed ContributorRedBigMan 11 points12 points  (0 children)

As soon as someone puts the law on you, you must sever all ties because that person is your enemy for life.

^ This. As soon as someone appeals to the authorities they become an adversary/enemy. Treat them as such. This means covering your ass at all times because as OP showed you can be in the middle of a civil conversation and the person can just go absolutely batshit and throw dogs out of cars and run off to a random house. This is doubly true for women because of the 'women are wonderful' effect and how well they can screw you in the system by crying a few crocodile tears on the stand.

[–]THE__USURPER 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Yep, ties needed to be severed as soon as the order was put into place. Many guys seemed to get nailed on the protective order violation. The female faces no consequences of initiating communication with the male, but for the male to reciprocate there are dire consequences. I have doubts about the IQ level of OP, because by being in her physical presence while the order was intact,he effectively handled her his balls and freedom on a platter.

[–]Mrbasie 4 points5 points  (0 children)

If you are poor you cant afford to be stupid. Thank you. Inspiration right there

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon 76 points77 points  (8 children)

OP: best of luck with this.

I have a mountain of evidence showing I'm innocent.

Hopefully this is enough to exonerate you.

Everyone else:

Once she starts with any sort of violence / threats / blackmail / false accusations - she gets cut out of your life and you never ever spend a moment in her company again, especially in private. These things never get better, they always escalate. Anything that looks like apology / confession / reconciliation is just another trick to play on you.

Seriously... that shit starts and you get out and you stay out. Supervised recorded visits only, for your own good. The world (police, courts) will believe a crazy deranged woman over a decent honest guy if she says anything that fits the narrative of "women are perfect and men are abusers".

Do not violate any protective / restraining orders, obviously. This is just playing into her hands and giving her complete power to report you.

Also... don't break up with a girl in private... expect the backlash and most of all do not be in private with her afterwards where she can make up a rape / abuse story. "I wasn't there and I can prove it" is the best defence.

Again - good luck, OP.

[–]no_face 37 points38 points  (3 children)

Also wait 3 days since your last intimate session before you break up so she wont be able to use discarded bodily fluids as evidence of rape

[–]babybopp 26 points27 points  (1 child)

and when she starts to go batshit crazy, record her. remember Carlos Cortez a dallas judge who recorded his girlfriend throwing herself out of a moving car so that she could say he pushed her out. https://youtu.be/op4scME3Ym4 forward to 6:40 sec to see that shit

[–]wiseprogressivethink 12 points13 points  (0 children)

and he lost his reelection bid

[–]Sdom1 300 points301 points  (109 children)

No single moms. EVER. When people tell me, "I just fuck them, what could happen?" I just want to choke them. Single mothers just have a much higher potential to be a whack job. I'll bet there were lots of other warning signs you ignored, of course.

Also, I knew what was coming when I read "order of protection." Dude, oldest trick in the book. Get the order, then lure you into a meeting and bam! No matter what reason you provide, you violated the order and you're screwed.

I don't really know where you go from here. I would definitely sue the first attorney, though.

[–]worldnewsrager 51 points52 points  (2 children)

Yea, I've gotten in a situation over single-mothers. Met at work, she was 7-years older, I was 21 but she had a big round ass and a raging sex drive. I was constantly ignoring warning signs, shit even her mother would tell me she had 'attachment problems' and all this shit. All ignored. 6-months later I was sitting in court over 'telephonic harassment' charges and her trying to insinuate i'd molested her 3-year old daughter. She didn't show at my arraignment, she didn't show at the first court date and she didn't show at the second. Between bail, impound and missed work for about 5 days, I was out a few grand. Though I count myself as lucky though that that molestation shit never caught traction. I swore off single-mothers. Never stick your dick in single-mothers.

[–][deleted] 120 points121 points  (56 children)

They're fucking scum. They have NO problem ruining their own child's life? You think they'll be civil with you? Ha.

[–]babybopp 153 points154 points  (52 children)

This is my personal list of women I avoid

  • single moms: EDIT: here is why. IF it is not daddy issues it is either one of these. Alpha widow, crazy Ex boyfriend, the mom herself is the crazy one, kid problems, if she has daughters best stay the fuck away from them , if you break up with her she could easily accuse you of molesting her kids, there is no time for doing anything because kids, ex husband/boyfriend/ex in law issues, etc.. and always wear a rubber with them before you end up on an episode of maury and never be left alone with their kids.

  • Girls whose mom divorced their dad and she "raised" them.- They have no father figure in their lives. usually find all their sisters are single. they are raised to believe men are evil and commitment is a sign of weakness. When one gets a boyfriend they make it a "it is either him or us" thing. Same with the divorced mother, she guilt trips her daughters into you are having fun while she found happiness in being a spinster shit. These girls make the worst kind of girlfriends. They are conditioned not to respect men. Give your heart to a man and he will shit on it. If you find a single girl early to late 30's who spends an unusual amount of time talking to her mom on the phone about everything including your sexual escapades.. move on

  • control freaks- a woman who wants to control your every move. these women usually have anger issues. stay away. how to know you have bagged one, when she gets mad at you for following the GPS instructions to go somewhere, when she "knows" a better and faster route.

  • women who berate, insult or belittle people. it is just a matter of time before it is you. How to spot one. If you see her talk shit to her family member and treat him badly or gets mad at a stranger for a small reason, like a waiter.. one day it will be you she talks to like that. Her kindness and gentle nature towards you is just a facade to rope you in.

  • narcissists, it will never be about both of you. Selfies galore, move on..

  • Women who treat pets like children. Reality is her dog is more important than you.

  • loud violent and mean women. aka ratchets.

  • leeches and gold diggers. she never buys you anything, she never pays for anything, all her money somehow finds its way to her mom's account to "support" her...

  • women who think that the mere fact you are fucking them is a heavenly gift. Do not participate in mutual sex. Expect their pussy licked, never give blowjobs. use sex as a tool for manipulation in relationships. Lie like a fucking log when being fucked, DOESN'T do doggy and you can forget about anal...because her daddy raised her to be that special snowflake that is one of a kind.

  • and most importantly, never date a rebound. They are the most unstable and have psycho tendencies. They are extremely manipulative in grooming a man to think that he is the one. Slowly the psycho leaks out and the man realizes he is a shadow of what she wants. Her inner hamster has slowly raised the Ex who dumped her to godlike status. Every memory exaggerated and makes her heart flutter. Somehow, you keep bumping into her Ex when you are together, she takes you to places and do things she used to do with her ex. She is the worst kind of woman to date especially if she has been alpha widowed, she will drop you like a turd in water. And then you are left wondering.." didn't she constantly complain that her ex used to cheat and beat her up???"

  • and one last honorable mention. girls who only have guy friends. Those famous words, women are bitches, i dont get along with them and only have guy friends. Reality is that she like surrounding herself with men who lust over her. 90% of them being white knights. Women constantly judge each other and her avoidance of this is so that she can remain in her little bubble where she is not accountable to any female standards like working out to look good in a bikini or treat a man right. Any sign of problems in your relationship and she is out with her "friends". it is a female version of abundance mentality. You are lucky to have me. These women usually have beta boyfriends that think they are the lucky one who conquered her. Reality is that you are merely just a plate to her. if you are that guy that comes home to find your SO "chilling with a bunch of guys".. yes it is you i refer to. You are just like the ramen noodles broke college kids endure till they move up and eat sushi. Don't be ramen noodles guy..don't!

EDIT: Grammer

[–]Chadtheslayer 90 points91 points  (22 children)

So you want me to avoid 80% of women in the USA?

[–]psycho-logical 101 points101 points [recovered]

You should be avoiding (filtering) way over 80% already.

[–][deleted] 25 points26 points  (3 children)

Dude I wouldn't touch 95% of women in their twenties, let alone women as a whole.

[–][deleted] 24 points24 points

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[–]2Overkillengine 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hey if you want to play Russian Roulette, feel free. Just try not to die on a public sidewalk. Having to step over a rotting corpse when going about one's day is inconvenient.

[–]Endorsed Contributorredpillbanana 39 points40 points  (10 children)

This is a good list. A few items that are conspicuously missing (and we could probably easily make this list hundreds of items long):

  • Women who claim they were raped.
    • If they really were raped, then they are going to have serious issues with sex. I feel truly sorry for them, but I won't date someone out of pity.
    • If they weren't raped, then either they are psycho and believe something that didn't happen or they made a false accusation. Both are massive red flags.
  • Women with horses or similarly expensive/time consuming hobby. https://archive.is/gX9xN
  • Women who have serious financial problems, or their family is in dire financial straits. They will eventually either ask for money or steal it from you, and even if they don't, all their effort is going to pay of the debt.
  • Women who describe themselves as "strong", or code word for "masculine".

[–]babybopp 9 points10 points  (5 children)

women with horses.. that is so true.

Rita Crundwell manipulated to what is the biggest municipal fraud in the history of America. Whe was the treasurer of Dixon Illinois and embezzled $53.7 million from the city of dixon over 22 years to support her quarter horse breeding operation. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rita_Crundwell

The city had problems with roads, police, wages, social services. She did not care about any of that. She was caught after going on vacation and a substitute looked over the books. Funny thing is that the horse breeding made no money. Prizes for winning were relatively small. people always assumed she was making bank from the breeding that is why she was rich.

[–]hirjd 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I think you just derived unicorn.

[–]eternal_temptation 19 points20 points  (3 children)

are you sure after this list you are left over with women?

I think they are called unicorns... :D

Good list mate.

[–]bigeyedbunny 12 points13 points  (4 children)

They're single mums exactly because they were so crazy and mentally ill and psycho that they forced the father of the child away from... This says everything you need to know about single mums

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

And god help you if it's multiple children from multiple men who didn't stick around!

[–]Sherlock--Holmes 18 points19 points  (20 children)

I've been banging single moms for 20+ years without a single incident. 100% of them have been good people. Maybe I'm lucky or maybe I just can smell crazy..

[–]ATrashMan 17 points18 points  (1 child)

I have fucked/date two single moms. One was batshit crazy, the other was just pretty fucking crazy. NEVER. AGAIN.

[–]Endorsed ContributorDenswend 354 points355 points  (38 children)

Chen Sheng was an officer serving the Qin Dynasty, famous for their draconian punishments. He was supposed to lead his army to a rendezvous point, but he got delayed by heavy rains and it became clear he was going to arrive late. Chen turns to his friend Wu Guang and asks What’s the penalty for being late? Death says Wu.And what’s the penalty for rebellion? Death says Wu.Well then… says Chen Sheng. And thus began the famous Dazexiang Uprising, which caused thousands of deaths and helped usher in a period of instability and chaos that resulted in the fall of the Qin Dynasty three years later.

I cannot and will not advise anything. But the Slav in me would retaliate disproportionately.

[–]Troll_Name 102 points103 points  (6 children)

I always think about this concept right here.

I don't think it applies in OP's case - OP NEEDS to be calm and level headed - but yeah if all consequences are the same then do whatever the fuck you feel like. Piracy in the golden age of sail got a massive jumpstart from the fact that conscripted sailors were presented with a choice between dying to make their master rich or spending the rest of their lives marked for death.

OP: lawyer is your only hope at this point. Let's all hope you picked a good one.

[–]Captain_Unremarkable 28 points29 points  (4 children)

Considering the fact that 1. he was in the army and 2. he met up with her in person despite being ordered to stay away, he sounds like an idiot, and I wouldn't count on him selecting a good lawyer.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (1 child)


sad but true regarding point #2. It's SO fucking dumb to meet up with her when there's a court order saying not to - even if you get pulled over on a speeding ticket or something else you're fucking done.

of course I wouuld replace #1 in your post with DATING A SINGLE MOTHER, you're picking up confirmed damaged merchandise

last time i everyone disagreed and downvoted me when the person in the story was a single mother due to her husband dying, but it's the same shit. he died, she'll still want him, the kid will still like him, the kid will have a harder time viewing you as the father, etc.

why go through the extra hassle, risk, and headache of dating a single mother EVER when you can pick from so many non-mothers? I'll never understand

[–]Fafner2 84 points85 points  (6 children)

I've said it many times here before, but as men increasingly become victims of a legal society that favors injustice towards men due to the mere anecdotes of women, men will take action outside of the law. Vigilantism always becomes warranted when a legal system is so corrupt that justice transforms into a foreign concept.

[–]occupythekitchen 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The problem is they commit suicide. If even 1% of men who are divorce raped or are victims of lies committed murder i am sure it wouldnt be as common

[–]2Overkillengine 24 points25 points  (5 children)

In for a lamb, in for a sheep, as the old saying goes. If one is going to be punished anyways may as well make it worth it.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

See the proble with this line of thinking is, as far as the courts are concerned, he's already done the crime. Anything else he does will only add more time on top of what he has now.

[–]HuskerMedic 140 points141 points  (15 children)

As a cop, let me tell you this:

Never, ever, ever use a public defender or court appointed attorney. I don't care if you have to sell everything you own and hock your grandma's wedding ring. Hire a private defense attorney.

Most public defenders have a huge caseload and are more interested in getting cases off the books than seeing justice served.

As for suing your first attorney, good luck. Ever hear the saying "blood from a turnip"? If your first attorney was a public defender, chances are they are making less money than the cops who arrested you. As for contacting the bar association, again, good luck. The attorney will just say you made the plea freely, knowingly, and willingly. It'll be your word against theirs, and you're a convicted felon, so who do you think they'll believe, you,or one of their own?

Sorry to be such a downer, but based on my experience, I think you have a tough time ahead.

If anyone should take anything away from all this, it should be DO NOT USE A PUBLIC DEFENDER.

[–]worldnewsrager 25 points26 points  (8 children)

Yea... or maybe it should be cops taking more time to properly investigate these issues before just handing a DV case that hasn't been properly vetted off the the DA. You're here shitting on the public defender... the reality of the situation is had the police investigated properly, instead of just being the modern, neutered manginas, half the time these cases wouldn't even pushed. And those shitty public defenders wouldn't have so many cases in the first place.

[–]McLarenX 13 points14 points  (1 child)

They arrest based on what the woman says because they have to. It's not a fair system. If you are in a situation where the police are coming and there is no injury to the victim, get out of the house. If you're on scene, you will be arrested based on simple liability and probability that the victim will be threatened.

[–]Endorsed ContributorMentORPHEUS 37 points38 points  (3 children)

Dumbass! You should have collected the letters and notes, recorded calls, screencapped emails, and TAKEN THAT BEFORE THE JUDGE!

I dealt with crazy before, and she tried to drag me through the legal system. By remaining calm, civil, professional, and maintaining an unchanging story supported by evidence, it ended with HER being led out of the courtroom in handcuffs.

You should not have taken the plea deal. Bring your evidence to court and challenge this type of thing. The legal system is self-perpetuating and NOT interested in justice, just getting people in the system and having 1,001 ways to KEEP them there.

[–][deleted] 180 points180 points

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[–]Oftowerbroleaning[S] 61 points62 points  (30 children)

I did bring her text and emails. I even gave them my phone and did a phone dump so they could verify authenticity. They did nothing with it.

[–][deleted] 139 points140 points  (5 children)

You need to present that with an attorney.. They can ignore you, they won;t ignore your lawyer.

Warning, if a chick hits you with a restraining order stay away and go to your lawyer. If she contacts you, go to your lawyer. Have them file the proper motions.

The cops have no incentive to give you exculpatory evidence as they would be seen and attacked politically by activists for not "protecting women enough". You the defendant have to prove your innocence.

[–][deleted] 65 points66 points  (2 children)

Ah the good ol' days when you were innocent until proven guilty. These days, if you are a man, you are guilty until YOU prove your innocense.

[–]eternal_temptation 25 points26 points  (1 child)


These days, if you are a man, you are guilty even if you are proven innocent.

[–]juliusstreicher 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I can improve on your improvement...You are never proven innocent-you were just let off because the police/judge/jury were part of the rape culture in your area.

[–]Sdom1 50 points51 points  (2 children)

You're just going to have to hope you can appeal it and get that evidence considered. Appellate judges tend to be much more intelligent than your run of the mill judges and attorneys.

Oh, and sue that first attorney for malpractice, and definitely call your state Bar Association. Not clearly communicating that you were pleading guilty to a felony and that it was an appeal and not a right of recision is grounds for being disciplined by the bar. They take this type of shit really seriously, give it a shot.

[–]RUSTY_LEMONADE 8 points9 points  (7 children)

Killbutt_3_2's 2nd point; no contact orders go both ways. She violated the order and you have proof. That should be all you need to end this.

[–]2 Senior Endorsed Contributorvengefully_yours 8 points9 points  (6 children)

Depends on the state law. Here the accuser can do anything they want, the accused can't. Here its a misdemeanor, shouldn't be a felony. Hell I had a 3 day suspended sentence because the bitch copied something I wrote online and claimed I gave it to her.

[–]ThePermanentGuest 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Have your attorney take it to the District Attorney who is prosecuting your case, NOT the police.

Consider making an affidavit (sworn, notarized statement) of the matters that took place. State clearly the course of events.

If you are keen on taking a plea deal, See if you can 1) avoid jail time, and 2) enter into a pre-trial diversion program where you can be eligible to have the charge expunged (not sure if available for felony in your state). Honestly I don't like plea deals where the actor is "innocent," so have your evidence ready to go. The truth has a way of coming out, provided you have a good attorney to facilitate that.

Also, this is not legal advice.

[–]evileddy 6 points7 points  (0 children)


Hope you get a judge like Judge Judy.

[–]SunshineBlotters 31 points32 points  (4 children)

Never should have met up with her. She has clearly defined herself as a vicious enemy.

This cannot be stressed enough

His entire case was decided when he met up with someone who has a protective order against him.

I have a friend who had a restraining order against him despite not actually doing anything. Bitch lied and said he abused her or something. One day he bumped into his ex's bf, shrugged it off, and told him he wishes them luck. The ex found out about it and he got arrested for "attempting to contact her via 3rd party". She spun it as him trying to send her message. Still fighting the case 2 years later

[–]Quarter_Century_Club 4 points5 points  (1 child)

"attempting to contact her via 3rd party".

Is that an actual crime? Absolutely retarded.

[–]SunshineBlotters 16 points17 points  (0 children)

In IL it is. I was in shock. Basically if someone puts a restraining order on you, you are basically putting yourself at risk for talking to someone that knows them. She can easily twist the words around and make it seem like you were trying to contact her. As a male you are automatically liable. It's a complete load of shit.

[–]Endorsed ContributorFLFTW16 33 points34 points  (8 children)

Your life in Slave Colony North-America is effectively over. Your chances of starting a successful slave rebellion are close to nil. Your best option is to pull a runner and escape the colony. China is nice. Thailand is nice. Cambodia is nice. South America is nice. There are many places a hard working slave can go where he can earn money as a free man, have free associations, and enjoy life by leaving slavery behind him forever.

[–]vanhagen 25 points26 points  (3 children)

Lessons learned for this: #1 when someone files a restraining order against you (and this applies to those of you about to go through a divorce. Very common for your soon to be ex to get one) Do Not violate it for any reason. #2 Don't be cheap. spend whatever you have to hire a good attorney from the beginning. Your freedom and your future are worth the money!

[–]ModAerobus 108 points109 points  (31 children)

I'm sorry.

Let this be a lesson to all men reading.

Don't involve yourself with single mothers.

Don't trust women.

As /u/bsutansalt has said about a thousand times, record everything. And I guess, since we're males, pray that the court will not dismiss your recordings as evidence.

[–]youeatlikeachild 19 points20 points  (16 children)

This. I discussed this in another thread and a bunch of guys were telling me it was a felony in certain states and can't use in court and and blah blah blah when we were talking about being falsely accused of fucking RAPE!!!

Men please, for christ, your phones probably all have one touch record, just get in the habit of doing it when you are alone with a chick, or when you stumble on a crazy one who calls you constantly. There are apps that will record all your calls.

Who gives a fuck if it is illegal or can't be used? Send it to the news, the NY Times, everywhere, save yourself. I have no idea if OP is legit but his story is not uncommon, it absolutely can be YOU.

[–]galt88 6 points7 points  (11 children)

If you live in a one party consent state, I recommend the Sanity app. It's like $4. Protect yourselves.

[–]worldnewsrager 15 points16 points  (10 children)

No, he's saying even if you live in a dual-consent state, fuck it. Record it and publish/distribute it anyway. What the dude is saying is he'd rather get hit with an additional charge of 'wiretapping' or w/e they throw at him, so long as people know the woman lied, which could heavily pressure the state to drop the case (even if it technically isn't admissible in court). He'd rather have a wiretapping charge added just to weaken the rape allegation.

Linda Tripp's secretly recorded tapes of Monica Lewinsky is what destroyed Lewinsky's credibility and had her facing a perjury charge along with Paula Jones. Clinton would have very likely been impeached and then convicted of some form of sexual assault had those tapes not been leaked and severely damaged the credibility of the women and the resolve of the people trying to prosecute the case.

Like in top comment? What is the penalty for being late/What is the penalty for treason? Lucky for us the penalty for wiretapping is far less severe than rape.

[–]ModAerobus 16 points17 points  (3 children)

No, he's saying even if you live in a dual-consent state, fuck it. Record it and publish/distribute it anyway. What the dude is saying is he'd rather get hit with an additional charge of 'wiretapping' or w/e they throw at him, so long as people know the woman lied, which could heavily pressure the state to drop the case (even if it technically isn't admissible in court). He'd rather have a wiretapping charge added just to weaken the rape allegation.

Or, ideally, get a wiretapping charge instead of a false rape charge.

The first makes people think you're a weird guy obsessed with privacy/or that you intrude on people's privacy. Big deal.

The latter makes people think you are a threat to society.

Case in point: feminists are up in arms about rape culture, not about the NSA wiretapping.

[–]trpftw 2 points3 points  (2 children)

The crime of wiretapping is silly in the first place and is really designed for perverts using it to spy on people and politicians/governments trying to use it against their opponents.

Literally, one of the cases that made wiretapping such a big deal in the supreme court was that a criminal was caught on the phone talking about his crimes...

So it was like... his lawyer decided that he can't get the charges thrown out because IT WAS THE TRUTH... So he went to the supreme court and got the evidence thrown out for violating his privacy.

Basically privacy is a concept invented by criminals to protect themselves from THE TRUTH.

The Nixon administration was charged with many wiretappings because they had bugged their own offices and had recordings of their own crimes. They were charged for basically trying to protect themselves and because they confessed to their own crimes essentially on tape. The main charge was that they were spying on themselves (or any others who visit the white house) while claiming it was for national security.

Even a lawyer is going to struggle to explain how convoluted these cases are.

But suffice it to say, that wiretapping is about preventing the truth from getting out.

Anti-government people will use wiretapping charges to protect their criminal activities. Governments themselves will use wiretapping charges to arrest people recording their actions or criminal activities. It's a legal concept designed to persecute.

Why does reddit love privacy so much? Because so many of them are committing crimes on the internet that they are worried one day the cops will start recording all their dumbass reddit comments or will arrest them for buying something illegal online or for piracy.

You will even hear them complain that they are worried their "future political career could get ruined if they are 'recording the internet' " That's how absurd their worries are.

[–]2Overkillengine 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'd like to add onto this:

The risk of an unauthorized recording charge is more than worth being able to shred any plausible deniability the court can hide behind in order to grant a pussypass. They do it too openly and they risk consequences they'd prefer to avoid.

People don't seem to get that as they have been so indoctrinated to comply with force of law even when it is distinctly not to their advantage.

Bullies count on their targets meekly backing down. Be pragmatic and cautious when needed, but when backed into a corner, don't be afraid to go Pyrrhic. At that point, they have more to lose from it than you do.

[–]Purecorrupt 15 points16 points  (8 children)

IMO you shouldn't trust anyone unless you know they have no gain in what they are offering.

Full circle...

"Don't trust the White man!".

"Don't trust Men!".

"Don't trust Women!"

"Don't trust anyone."

Take any an all advice with the knowledge that the paradigm the advice is coming from has different sexual/economical/social background and perspective from you.

To be more specific in this case. A single mother has a child(ren) that she almost always undoubtedly says that child(ren) is her #1(2,3,...). As a single man with no kids you are going into a situation where the #1(2,3,...) Spots are taken.

Example when she says "I love you" does she mean I love you and would do anything for you?


"I love you, but not as much as myself, my baby, my dad, my mom, my cat, and I guess you can be #6".

[–]Purecorrupt 7 points8 points  (6 children)

I had to add the cat because in my super beta days I had a girl tell me she would probably love her cat more than she could love anyone else. She was childless. If anyone else does a lot of online dating there is more anecdotal evidence of girls that will pre-emptively put in their profile they WILL love their pets more than you.

[–]aga080 17 points18 points  (3 children)

bitch threw your fucking dog? thats some shameful ass shit, that dog did nothing to deserve that.

[–]NiceTryDisaster 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Guys guys, we all know OP fucked up more than once. Dated a single mother, broke protective order, went with the state appointed attorney etc. I know it, you know it, OP knows it. But whats done is done.

Let's work at the solution instead. What can OP do to get out from this mess and protect himself? Let's work at the solutions. I really feel bad for this.

Any lawyers who browse this sub willing to help OP?

Any people who have gone through this in the past have any advice to offer?

Mods, trp endorsed contributors anything to say?

Can OP sell everything he owns and move to another state or country?

If no solutions, how can OP keep damage to a minimum?

[–]2IVIaskerade 16 points17 points  (0 children)

Welcome to the dark side, mate.

[–]Rasalom72 30 points31 points  (1 child)

The most common held fallacy is that there is any justice to be had in the "justice" system. It's called that to give people the Feeling of justice... but it's really just the criminal court system.

[–]Sara_Solo 10 points11 points  (0 children)

You'd think that there is more justice in the criminal system being that the burden of proof is much higher than a mere preponderance, but logic is immediately thrown out when a sweet innocent woman enters the equation.

[–]Soriq 28 points29 points  (1 child)

I actually do have sympathy for you. Shit's fucked up.

Definitely try another lawyer. If you have valid evidence, keep fighting this. Don't lay down and take this so easily.

[–]PrinceLeon 221 points222 points  (57 children)

You're joking right? The way that the court handled your situation given that you have "mountains of evidence" pointing towards that psycho bitch lying about the entire thing should allow you to sue both her and the court for a substantial amount of money.
Find a good lawyer and present him with the same amount of evidence you presented the court and tell the lawyer he can have a large chunk of your winnings after you successfully sue the ever loving shit out of the court and that psycho cunt.

And if that fails and you're looking at jail time, make sure you fuck that bitch up enough to have earned however long you're going away for

[–][deleted] 199 points200 points  (28 children)

He can't sue the court. he accepted a plea. He admitted to a felony in court, knowingly and voluntarily. It's OVER. He has to chalk this one up.

[–]1favours_of_the_moon 140 points141 points  (23 children)

Not only that, he violated the previous court order. YOU LOSE.

[–]TRPhd 102 points103 points  (4 children)

Never, ever, under any circumstances, intentionally or unintentionally, violate any kind of restrictive order. If you did accidentally, call your lawyer IMMEDIATELY and ask for advice. (Tell him/her first, don't let them hear it from the prosecutor.)

Leave the city/town if you can. Seriously, protection orders are Get-Into-Jail-Free cards. If you don't care about jail, fine, you won't care, but if you are focused on self-improvement and building a good life those things are like cyanide. Run-fucking-run.

[–]1Snivellious 27 points28 points  (3 children)

No joke. The (verbal, so you can't even prove it) invitation to come over isn't going to change the outcome of violating an explicit court order.

Fair or not, this is a case of "You're actually guilty, and you admitted it, try and mitigate the charges".

[–]1WidmerBeer 42 points43 points  (2 children)

I'm not promoting violence either... but listen to this man right here.

We can 'victim blame' as the SJW would say, which indeed we will to let others know just how bad your life can be. But if this man is truly innocent, then he should fight fire with fire and get a lawyer on his side to fight tooth and nail to see this woman is brought to justice.

Listen to the free legal advice given here, and godspeed. Hopefully you get some Lawyers who know a psycho cunt story when he hears one.

[–]Sherlock--Holmes 7 points8 points  (1 child)

He's a felon, so he can't get a good job to earn the money to do that. At least not for several years..

[–]j4q 20 points21 points  (7 children)

Can't sue the court. You could sue her, but you'll lose and probably be on the hook for her attorney's fees. All you can do is get help from friends to get a recording of her admitting fault. But first you need to check the eavesdropping/recording laws in your state, because in some states it's disallowed so the admission would be useless. Best of luck.

[–]ScottDude13 19 points20 points  (1 child)

I'd step up the appeal to the state courts, use the evidence and hire a good attorney. If you're telling the truth, this is clean and clear obstruction of justice and perjury. Establish the case with the state and have the date set and then launch a civil suit for defamation/slander and emotional damages.

Go all out or go home.

[–]Endorsed ContributorAFPJ 13 points14 points  (16 children)

make sure you fuck that bitch up enough to have earned however long you're going away for

This. Someone tries to destroy your life? Destroy theirs. Genders are irrelevant

[–]hirjd 7 points8 points  (9 children)

What are the nuts and bolts? Kill her? Torch her insured car? Throw her kid off a roof? Dogshit on her porch? I mean, WTF exactly are you saying. The comment is uselessly ethereal.

[–]jaimewarlock 29 points29 points [recovered]

As soon as she called the cops on you, you should have cut all ties.

Sorry dude, you fucked up, time to move to another country and start a new life.

[–]cdtCPTret 14 points15 points  (0 children)

French Foreign Legion. Hear nice things about em.

[–]Oftowerbroleaning[S] 17 points18 points  (12 children)

I've considered it, but my mom has alzheimers and my dad recently had a stroke. My family needs me right now.

[–]1CowardlyPetrov 35 points36 points  (9 children)

I'm sure you will do a lot for them in prison.

[–]TRPhd 20 points21 points  (5 children)

He's not getting any time on the inside, just a shit-ton of fines, probation and community service. That way the "justice" system can extract resources and not expend them on a clearly non-dangerous individual.

[–]1CowardlyPetrov 12 points13 points  (3 children)

Great, so I am sure he will do a lot for his family as a slave.

[–]TRPhd 5 points6 points  (2 children)

Well, at least the ass-raping is metaphorical.

[–]1CowardlyPetrov 5 points6 points  (1 child)

The serf thanks god he is not a slave.

[–]thisiskindofmessedup 24 points25 points  (4 children)

Holy shit. These stories make me want to invest in body cameras. smh this shit is despicable.

[–]Blake55 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Even a dashcam would have prevented this bs.

[–][deleted] 34 points35 points  (1 child)

protective order to stay away from her

We were driving down the road later that night

You're an idiot, you let her use the justice system to ruin your life. Live and learn.

[–]TRP VanguardWhisper 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Get a lawyer. Don't have any interaction with the "justice" system, in any capacity, without a lawyer standing next to you.

[–]PheromoneVoid 45 points46 points  (3 children)

Phew. Take that as your reminder that single-mothers aren't worthy of any self-respecting man's time.

[–][deleted] 26 points27 points  (2 children)

CisWhite said it right. They are fucking scum. Beat your dick if you can't find another bitch. Don't give these shit humans that are destroying America good dick.

[–]chetmanly2 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Never, ever, ever accept the plea deal.

Ever. You got a felony conviction without a day in court? Fuck that, always fight felonies.

[–]Echelon64 7 points8 points  (0 children)

dating an older single mother

Fucking christ m8 you've really gone fucked up.

[–]bearslikeham 19 points19 points [recovered]

/u/Oftowerbroleaning woman will destroy your life without a second thought only to feel good. This is the reason you can never trust a woman. If they feel good accusing you of rape, they will do it. It doesn't matter if you go to prison for 6 years, get anally raped every single day and get HIV ; If she feels good , she will do it.

What you are dealing now is terrible, but you will survive and get stronger. I wish you the very best of luck man. Single mothers are scum, the lowest of the low.

[–][deleted] 86 points87 points  (53 children)

Why the fuck did you trust her to be civil? She had already proven that she'd lie to get you into trouble. You'll get no sympathy from me.

[–]Oftowerbroleaning[S] 54 points55 points  (37 children)

I don't seek sympathy. I just had to tell someone. I hate myself for being so fucking stupid

[–][deleted] 53 points54 points  (33 children)

Good, now take that hate and turn it into something productive. Like appealing to a higher court.

[–]Oftowerbroleaning[S] 49 points50 points  (29 children)

Meeting with attorney tomorrow to discuss

[–][deleted] 122 points123 points  (7 children)

Good. Good luck. In the meantime, don't go over to her house if she promises you some pussy and hotwings, huh?

[–]Endorsed ContributorrebuildingMyself 9 points10 points  (5 children)

But who could resist hotwings?

[–]MRSubM 22 points23 points  (13 children)

Just move to asia bro, forget this shit and move on. Or south america. Go where the girls are young and the beer is cheap. Forget it all.

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (4 children)

Tough to get a passport now, though.

Men have zero protection from this kind of insanity.

[–]Sherlock--Holmes 9 points10 points  (6 children)

He's a felon with 8 years probation.

[–]Azzmo 6 points7 points  (5 children)

God damn we live in a weird system, where a guy can wrong no person and be declared a felon regardless of that.

[–]LugerDog 11 points12 points  (4 children)

Welcome to America. It almost happened to me and I'm still building evidence just in case. Hell I've still got 9 days left to walk on egg shells so she doesn't file the paperwork for "aggravated stalking" when i didn't do shit. Fucking huge mistake letting her find out about apps that can spoof your number to make it look like you callef over and over plus the fake texts. It fucking sucks and guess what? Single mother....... I've already went to jail for " domestic violence" and had to sweet talk her into dropping the order. It really sucks cause the only sure fire way to stop her is give her the good dick she loves so much. This presents another issue that i have to build eveidence for and get witnesses. Save text and record calls of her begging for it, asking to come over, showing up at my place, and so on. I can't FUCKING wait till I can run without blackmail. I will be ending all contact at a sheriffs office after the 9 days are up. To show her flip her shit and start in. Already have texts saying well I'll tell then this or that. Then the ones saying I'm sorry for the fake threats.... It's a nightmare.

[–]like_a_ghost 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Or you could use the hate to shoot lightning out your fingertips

[–][deleted] 7 points7 points

[permanently deleted]

[–]Cr3X1eUZ 11 points12 points  (3 children)

If there were more quality pussy available he wouldn't have gone back to her, or even have been with her in the first place probably.

That's the real problem.

[–]tallwheel 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Fuck no. Abundance mentality and DGAF. Never settle for pussy of this shitty quality. Sometimes getting no pussy at all is preferable to chasing dangerous pussy.

[–]no_face 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Yes its a Keynesian economic model flaw

[–]slcjosh 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Convince the lawyer you paid a shit ton of money too to take your case to appeals court, and also a civil suit. Sue the bitch. If this is real.

[–]sweetleef 7 points8 points  (0 children)

First off, your situation sucks hard, and anyone who's dealt with women can sympathize.

You had your day in court, by by taking a plea deal. But it's hard to believe that an attorney actually lied about having a chance to "change your mind". He would have nothing to gain by screwing you, and would put his career at risk or worse. As for whether there's anything to be done at this point, the only thing you can do is get a good criminal lawyer, tell him everything, and don't say another word to the woman or the police, no matter what.

If this follows the standard pattern, she be back, desperate, like a deranged addict coming off her power high and looking for a drama fix. Expect more stunts and lies, destruction of property, assaulting you and your family, suicide threats, anything possible to keep the attention orgy going. Ask your lawyer about how to deal with it, because it's coming.

[–]mobilus 6 points6 points [recovered]

Never plea to anything. Ever.

[–]ATrashMan 8 points9 points  (3 children)

Any updates on the dog's present health?

[–][deleted] 6 points6 points

[permanently deleted]

[–]shellkek 2 points3 points  (0 children)

OP please give updates on this really curious about your case!

[–]1RPAlternate42 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The cops arrested me again for violating the protective order.

You would have been fine, I think, if you had just NOT VIOLATED THE FUCKING COURT ORDER.

The cops and the justice system deal with false claims pretty regularly.

You, however, decided that a crazy bitch's word was more important; you thought she'd be honorable. You thought she developed some fucking character within 2 weeks?

Jesus T.F. Christ, son. Unfortunately, you learned this lesson the very hard way.

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (2 children)

Dude... holy shit... come to Europe and forget about that shit. I cant believe that the US would betray a veteran like that... Is your dog ok?

[–]Philhelm 16 points17 points  (0 children)

The U.S. is notorious for betraying veterans.

[–][deleted] 8 points8 points

[permanently deleted]

[–]NightGod 6 points7 points  (0 children)

She ruined his life because he broke her heart. Totally fair! /s

[–]tyrryt 8 points9 points  (0 children)

but two weeks later coming after you like that again? Premeditated too, I don't understand why - emotional again?

Attention, drama, spite, exerting control over a man, acting on emotional impulse - the same things that motivate all women.

[–]1v1mebruh 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Take note guys! Don't be a retard. Sorry to hear your story, but boy oh boy, NEVER EVER talk to a bitch who calls the cops on you after the initial incident. Be grateful that you got out of it with just a restraining order and GET THE FUCK AWAY. You play with fire, you risk getting burnt; play with fire after getting burnt once, and you're an idiot.

[–]Appomattoxx 6 points7 points  (0 children)

There's nothing I can do for the OP, but for anyone else a few things:

1.) A woman can call the police at anytime and say you assaulted her. If she does, you will most likely go to jail. This is just a fact. Sorry.

2.) If there's a protective order, that means stay the fuck away from her. It doesn't matter how many times she calls, texts, or comes over. The protective order applies to you, not to her. She does not have authority to change it - only the judge does.

If she calls or texts or leaves messages, RECORD THEM. But do not respond. If she comes to your house, call the police, and ask them to issue a trespass warning. It's your house: she has no right to be there.

3.) Never ever agree to a plea bargain for something you didn't do. Laws vary from state to state, but as a general matter your chances of undoing a plea bargain are between slim and nothing.

[–]billcosbyeatsbabies 6 points7 points  (1 child)

gonna be honest here buddy, you fucked up on multiple occasions. nothing we say can help you immediately fix the situation. you're still going to fuck up regardless of how much guidance we give you, because your mind is in such a fragile and unstable place. something about you seemed vulnerable, something about you seemed like it'd be easy to exploit you. that cunt exploited you, and the police exploited you. what are you going to do about it? as of this exact moment, develop the most stubborn frame ever known to the face of man. how the fuck did you even let them arrest you or give you a sentence in the first place? because you have a penetrable frame. you seemed weak somehow. i would have repeatedly told the police that were arresting me in a very calm and matter-of-fact fashion that i did not abuse her, so why am i being arrested for it? spell it out for them in plain and simple terms. like you were speaking to a kindergartner.

it's never too late. develop your stubborn frame instantaneously. right fucking now. next time you see your lawyer/judge/police officer who arrested you/any official authority in this case, let them know you are going to pursue this case to the absolute ends of the earth to prove you didnt do it. the key here is to deliver your message of innocence to the right people in the most calm, cool and collected frame known to man. endurance wins my friend. tire the opponents out. keep going until they dont give a fuck anymore. tell them you would literally rather die than to give up this case right now. she severely injured your dog, your mental health and she is a huge threat to society. people such as herself shouldnt be allowed near anyone. tell them plainly, flat out, calm and composed, with the conviction of the motherfucking army vet that you are, that you will not be arrested for this. you didnt do it, so you dont deserve to get arrested for it. flat out.

[–]PissedPajamas 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Don't ever let your guard down around women, especially single mothers. Record everything

[–]DontEatTheDaisies 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Jesus fucking christ why did you meet up with her again knowing that you had an order on you? Why wouldn't you show all those texts and letters to the cops when they happened. I mean seriously you could have avoided all of this AND got her on falsifying a police report. Holy shit.

[–]automatepmp 4 points5 points  (1 child)

24 years old with no wife or kids and this legal trouble hanging over your head? Find another country to start over again.

[–]ColtsDragoon 7 points8 points  (0 children)

This. Your country sold you down the river so its high time you pledge yourself to another flag. Russia is looking for some solid trigger men to fuck up the American/Israeli funded&trained ISIS Fighters so try your luck there. Also the French Foreign legion is an option too.

[–]TheSliceman 33 points34 points  (6 children)

And that was the day OP became an anarchist and an atheist.

He realized there is no God. No karmic order in the universe. No Jesus coming to save him. The only thing he has is what he takes for himself.

He also was hit with ton of brick realization that the state does not care about him. In fact, the state hates him. Its justice theater is nothing short of a kangaroo court meant to appease the stupid masses into a false sense of security. He realized the institution of the state is evil in its most tangible form.

Today is the day you start as a new man. You have been given the ultimate gift: knowledge.

And just FYI, having a felony only infringes a future career as a cog in the machine. You didnt want that anyway. A felony does not and will not stop you from self-actualization financially or otherwise.

I have been down on my luck too, brother. You will emerge from this stronger. Embrace the pain. Embrace the suffering. Become one with it.

[–]1CowardlyPetrov 18 points19 points  (4 children)

I find it hard not to suspect this guy of being a feminist troll trying to incite anger.

[–]awedfeab 13 points14 points  (2 children)

baiting out the "go kill her" responses heh

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

why would you agree to meet her without wearing a tape recorder?

[–]Fafner2 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You sound like a fool for violating the court order. This is a malicious woman, and I hope that justice makes its way into her life one way or another.

[–]OwlsExterminator 4 points5 points  (0 children)

She cheated on you. Then she lied about abuse. Then she lied to you again that she would recant. Seriously were you expecting to get back together with her and forgive her cheating ways? You were stupid enough to go meet her after a restraining order. It was a fucking set up.


BTW Second life lesson. You get what you pay for. Don't be cheap and lie about your income to get a public defender (aka public pretenders).

[–]1wanderer1976 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I don't have time to wade through 600 and some odd comments, so here is my two cents.

1. As others have said, once she placed the restraining order, she should have been dead to you. Blocking her calls and texts and possibly filing a stalking charge with the police using personal letters left on your vehicle is the route you should have taken, but that is water under the bridge at this point, take the lesson learned.

2 Since you didn't do the above before, do it now.

3 You will get your day in court. Make sure your attorney has all of the evidence and that it is is submitted to the court in your counter claim. Make very sure that any veterinary bill from her throwing your dog from the moving vehicle are included in the evidence. Make sure you a bring a copy of all of the evidence with you. Judges see this sort of shit every day, and it isn't decided in some bull shit family court. They will take into consideration all of the mitigating circumstances and evidence. This case seems like a misdemeanor with a suspended sentence. Your current attorney should be aiding and advising you on these matters.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I don't know what the wiretapping laws are in your state but if she was calling you and admitting over the phone that she lied you should have recorded it.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Guys got missed the single mom post.

Question, why did you go back after the first arrest? You like punishment?

[–]anooblol 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Guilty until proven innocent. Awesome.

[–]RPRedhead 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Sorry this happened to you, brother. Orders for Protection (OfPs) are insane and totally unfair. I know because my ex put one on me to start our divorce. Someday I may tell that story here.

You've made at least two mistakes so far. One, violating the initial OfP. NEVER, EVER do that. Violating it usually makes it permanent andor gets you convicted. Two, you should have lawyered up THE INSTANT you were served.

Best wishes fighting it. Sounds like it may be an uphill battle. But know this: Your future is not ruined, just altered. Your life is not over. It sucks, but you can overcome.

[–]Arbitrage84 4 points5 points  (0 children)

never ever date single mothers. Holy fuck bro, I hope you recover.

[–]midoriringo 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Did she tell you through text or email or something that "if I met her she would tell the cops the truth that she made it up"? I'm curious as to why you didn't present this as evidence? Maybe you still can. If you somewhere have evidence of her admitting she made it up, you may have a shot at dismantling this bullshit and removing that felony from your life.

[–]NPK5667 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Learn from his mistake boys. Could be worse OP

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

show them her text messages, voicemails and call logs.

[–]Maximum_Ordinate 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Best of luck man, I don't know what to tell you. I can't believe a human would stoop that low. Is your dog okay?

[–][deleted] 4 points4 points

[permanently deleted]

[–]Aiadon 4 points5 points  (0 children)

She lied about you abusing her, sue her for it. She invited you there, sue her for trying to set you up. You should never again trust someone that falsely accused you. That person feels no empathy for you and the only reason for contacting you again is to be able to lie even more against you. False claims of abuse and rape are punishable by law with prison. Hire a private detective and find evidence of her doing false accusations in the past. The best advice is to have no mercy and make sure she gets the maximum punishment possible, no deals, no nothing.

[–]Ozzyo520 3 points4 points  (0 children)


To be completely honest man, you've already been 10 kinds of stupid. The absolute worst thing you can do (besides seeing her again) is not get an attorney. Go to your state bars website and find one. Google them, read reviews. It you don't have money, figure it out. You're going to be fucked if you don't let an attorney handle this.

IF YOU'RE STILL READING YOU DIDN'T GET AN ATTORNEY IMMEDIATELY. STOP WHAT YOU'RE DOING AND GET ONE RIGHT NOW. This is real life, you will get triple butt fucked if you don't.

Wake up!

[–]floppymammarygland 5 points5 points [recovered]

Holy fuck.. Is your dog okay?

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

8 years is not that long. You can manage it. You are a good person and probation is not a problem for you.

Do everything you can to never, ever cross path of that woman again. Change city, country, whatever you can.

start your own business as a counteraction to potential employment problems.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (9 children)

That's fucked up. I don't get the part about your future being ruined though.

[–]Oftowerbroleaning[S] 12 points13 points  (8 children)

I hope it's not, but having a felony on my record is extremely discouraging. This will follow me.

[–]SpinalArt 15 points16 points  (0 children)

It will probably follow you but it won't ruin you. People have come back from worse. Consider this a lesson learned and be thankful it didn't end up being much worse.

[–]basker932 5 points6 points  (2 children)

You think you're in bad shape right now? No matter how bad things get, even if you can't imagine things getting any worse, it can; so don't do anything stupid that'll really fuck things up. That's a trap in and of itself, even worse than the one you already got sucked into. Just make the best of what remains. You think you're the first guy that made a huge blunder and came to pay for it dearly? No. But we take our licking and chalk it up to experience. As a man, think with your head, not with your emotions like women do. It only feels like the end of the world right now. Banish those feels. That's what men do; we are not governed by emotions but by reason. Close your eyes and visualize every scenario that could happen...you'll come to the right conclusion. You might even get a few chuckles out of it.

[–]hirjd 4 points5 points  (1 child)

About the only thing you can do now is go into politics.

[–]NeoreactionSafe 6 points7 points  (2 children)

You didn't see the trap.

You were in the military and what does the enemy do?

Do they tell you they are about to attack?

No... they trap you and attack when you don't expect it coming.

This woman has ruined your life and probably just for fun.

Were you reading Red Pill before this happened?

If so you didn't seem to get the message that women are totally fucked up these days.


Just so you know...

I once talked with a woman for five minutes and she later invented a story where I was stalking her. The accusation was entirely false, but she filed the paperwork at the police station and it's on my record. This all happened a month after that five minute interaction.

What did I do?

Never got anywhere near that woman again.

Women have the courts on their side.

It's war... you just got hit... accept your loss.


[–]NomNomYoMomma 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Do you have any notes, letters, or texts of her saying she will tell the truth if you came over. That could be used in your favor.

[–]rurpe 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The protective order is also protection for you. You need better legal representation.

[–]gonzotw 2 points3 points  (2 children)

The judge can't deny an appeal. That's what the appellate courts are for.

[–]kwest720 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Bitches be crazy, i feel for you bro, you definetly shouldnt have gone back to her under any circumstances but no of us know for sure what was going through your mind at the time, take it easy, things have a way of working out in the end. The psycho bitch will get her own soon enough

[–]2johnnight 2 points3 points  (7 children)

You actually violated the court order. You are not innocent in regard to that.

[–]Rougepellet 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Is it just me or are more women sociopaths or psychopathsthan men? Maybe not physically violent but still.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Bro, I know you are all up in shambles at the moment but reading this post I can't help but think this is one of two things.

  1. This bitch has been crazy, as in you should have known to next her a long time back.

  2. You aren't as innocent as you make yourself out to be.

Either way, as a man its on you. You say you are a vet and thats good. You say you come from a rich family and thats 100x better.

You can get your record cleaned up, get this knocked down to a misdemeanor like a disorderly or something, BUT NOT IF YOU FUCK UP! That means zero contact with the girl. None. Nothing. No exceptions. I don't care if you left your favorite moped in her garage, thats shits gone.

EDIT: I reread what I typed and it sounds too harsh. You will be ok OP but its all lawyers, money, and time now. Zero fucking contact.

[–]Swigart 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don't know if anyone has asked this yet, but is your dog ok?

[–]frostfire1337 2 points3 points  (0 children)

  1. leave. its not worth sticking around for bail. post your state, and maybe we can get one of your rp bros to come pick you up. If your in northern nebraska/south dakota I will help you.

[–]herewegoaga1n 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Sorry bud. I've been able to dodge my false accusations (3) so far. What is sad is when innocent guys like you are driven to suicide by these crazy bitches. I know RP is all "survival of the fittest", but I hope you're doing ok OP. Bitches be crazy. Stay strong.

[–]GBralta 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Op, you messed up bad here. However, you can see if the judge will accept the text, emails and voicemails as evidence that you were coerced into seeing her again. You've learned a valuable lesson as well. Single moms are usually single for a good reason and you should leave them where they are.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Good luck bro. Don't be so stupid in the future. If you saved the texts and shit you should be fine but mentally prepare for the worst case scenario.

Consider this a good lesson learned the hard way.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My state appointed attorney told me to accept the plea deal.

Over before it began, let this be a lesson to the rest of you, never willingly deal with the state, it's not your friend.

It's schools, they teach you to be subservient to your authority figures, don't forget everything you've ever learned in the system was to become a slave for it.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

OP, you fucked up big time here:

I was bailed out and given a 60 day protective order to stay away from her.

I came over...

A court ordered you to stay away from her, and you disobeyed that order. You completely fucked that up.

She's a terrible person and you did nothing malicious to her, but you cannot disobey court orders, even if they're based on lies and the protected person reaches out to you.

Had you not contacted her, kept all the evidence of her contacting you during the 60 day period, and shown it to the judge during the hearing that was probably scheduled for the end of the 60 days, the order may well have been tossed out and you could have walked a free man.

Best advice for anyone suddenly slapped with a protective order: do not have any contact whatsoever --physical, phone, text, email, facebook, smoke signal-- with the protected person (don't even discuss them with friends or family). Keep ANY evidence of their lying to get the order, and any contact they attempt with you during the order. Hire a criminal defense attorney, go to the hearing on the order with your evidence and your lawyer, fight to have the order dropped, and then NEVER have ANY contact with the person again, regardless of what happens.

The feminist lobby has made protective orders so overpowered and easy to get that it's not even funny.

[–]ghostface134 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Where are the letters of confession? You have the text messages on your phone account obviously as well as the emails.

[–]_DiscoNinja_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Whatever happens next, do exactly what the $7500 attorney tells you to do, with no deviation.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Stay away from single mother scums. Cut all contact with this woman FOREVER.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Liquidate all your assets, transfer to Bitcoin, pm if you want details on how to create an untraceable wallet.

Get your passport, get on a one way ticket out of there to a third world country of your choice. It's the best way out for you I suppose.

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