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LTRTRP has improved my marriage substantially. Things seem obvious in hindsight but it takes some medicine to fight the disease that society infects you with. Thanks redpill community. (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by shuaiya

DISCLAIMER 1 I originally posted something similar a few days ago but it was auto-modded because I included a link. Oops.

DISCLAIMER 2 I don't care if you think marriage is fundamentally incompatible with a redpill mindset. And I recognize that it is ridiculous to involve a government entity into a personal relationship between two people. But I am definitely happy with my choice.

SYNOPSIS

I'm married and in the past I felt responsible for every little issue that my wife had. Something broken? I'll fix it. Need something? I'll buy it. Unhappy? I'll change. Confused? I'll figure it out for us.

On the surface this just seems like good companionship. God knows how much training I got from family, media, and society to be a doting fix-it-upper. But we all know that this is actually beta behavior and things tend to get out of hand with time: trivial complaints, always needing something more, unfocused attention, unhappy for literally no reason at all.

BODY

The women in your life lose respect for you if you go too far in trying to please her. It wasn't until reading TRP that I understood I was damaging my position in our relationship by acknowledging every single problem she has. There is a fine line between deeply caring about your woman and doing nice things for her, or, being walked over and used as a manservant.

I don't think she's a nag, or evil. I think she has an innate predisposition to CONSTANTLY check up on the status of things. CONSTANTLY shit test. CONSTANTLY comfort check. It seems like women generally "live in the moment" and getting boyfriend/husband to go fetch something is a drug-like quick fix.

Then TRP flips everything around.

In this country I'M actually the prize and SHE should be the accommodating one.

I shouldn't pretend to care about a childish problem she's having.

I shouldn't depend on anyone else for my own happiness. If she’s unhappy I’ll just go be happy elsewhere.

Implementing TRP mindset was actually easy in my case but your mileage might vary.

Shit-tests/nagging: all from the sidebar

Laughing at the problem, ignoring it, or clearly stating your too busy for something silly like that. They all work to different degrees depending on the personality of the woman you're with. This is a complete 180 from my previous beta style to just give in and try to solve everything.

It works. It confounds me how well it works. I imagine trying this TRP style of argumentation in a serious situation and it's completely ridiculous. What if your boss asked for input on a problem and you just Agreed and Amplified to absurdity? You'd be canned. But for some reason this shit works with women...

For me personally the profound change is just how receptive she has been. I just gradually started standing my ground more, using deeper voice, poking fun at her when she complains, and by now it’s just second nature for me to hand-wave away whatever the issue is.

AND SHE EATS IT UP! Being “told” literally turns her on.

Firmly deflecting complaints is like playful spanking in bed.

Sex: women inevitably get the itch for strange dick some months into a relationship

So laying pipe isn't just a past-time it's a fucking duty!

If she wakes up sore nearly every morning she won't get random tingles out there during the day.

And if you aren't the best sex she ever had then you're relationship will fail.

Remember, I'M the prize dammit! I’m good looking and I make more. If I'm not getting my appetite's worth of sex in return for my providing and breadwinning then I’ll just use whatever’s in my TRP/PUA arsenal to get her juices flowing. But this hasn't really been an issue since I started just naturally turning her on more.

Sexualize her outside very often. Grab her ass in the elevator. Touch skin under her shirt with your arm around her. Kiss a lot.

Image: women are infinitely more influenced by appearances

This truthism isn't exclusive to TRP. It's just that most people try to subvert it or don't openly speak about it.

Improving yourself, working out, wearing nicer clothes... are all pretty superficial actually. I personally prefer reading compared to the gym but wife has literally nothing to gain from reading a book.

So being seen together by many people in our nice clothes, being complimented, and casually letting her witness my interactions with other beautiful women all work in my favor. It really sucks that clothing companies, clubs, and nice restaurants make easy cash from the stupefying cravings of all women but I’m willing to hamster this away as just part of the social contract I’ve made in order to live in a decent country. If everyone stopped buying nice things then we’d all have to go back to an agrarian society. But don’t get addicted to this kind of lifestyle. It’s a much better choice to focus on putting your money into useful things (no matter what she fucking says) and let yourselves be seen together in free places like beaches, parks, boardwalks, downtown, swimming pools, parties, etc. Only occasionally throw down cash for those aforementioned indulgences. Tough to balance.

Psych: Reward good behavior. Address bad behavior. Wife doesn’t get a new pair of heels everytime she gets an itch. She would even subconsciously lose some respect for me for easily giving in and buying something we both deep down know is actually useless. But if I’ve gotten all the sex and dinners I want for a week or two I’ll absolutely hold up my end up the bargain and get her something nice. She doesn’t earn a whole lot of money on her own so financial duties fall on my shoulders. We have spending money after bills, savings, and consumption. That doesn’t mean she doesn’t have to earn it.

But the trick is to be non-obvious about these sorts of things. Don’t waste too much money, don’t give in too easily, don’t spoil her, but at the same time don’t be cold. It’s an unspoken understanding than marriage isn’t terribly different from prostitution in many respects. Right in the foreground is trading good wife behavior for good husband behavior and all too often this is literally just sex and money, house, car, etc. Dress it up as companionship traded for providership if you want but we all know what the bottom line is. HOWEVER, if your relationship is founded purely on money instead of an alpha aura then I would suggest changing some things about yourself. Again, a balancing act.

TRP is divided on this aspect. Maybe I actually am beta bux for buying nice things for her and I'm just hamstering it. But I truly don’t see it that way. There would have to be a dead bedroom or a chad out there for that to be true and I guess if she cheats in the future I'll be sure to redact my post but since implementing TRP we've both been extremely happy with each other. I think good husbands should give good wives nice things from time to time and it doesn’t have to be analyzed too deeply.

Enough about money. Obviously you earn more and buy more but if you’re just a bank then you’re doing it wrong. If I had to weigh each category I’d put communication as 20%, image and money as 25%, sex as 40%, and mentality as 110%.

Mentality: NEVER BREAK FRAME.

Being on your A-game and constantly being firm, rational, practical, and strong is mentally and physically taxing. Sometimes I feel like I'm losing steam so I take time to be alone, maybe just a short shower, to reorganize my thoughts. Sometimes after work I actually feel too tired to have enjoyable sex but I unfailingly just muster the energy from somewhere and do the deed. Sometimes I feel too locked down so I "forget my phone" and go out alone and harmlessly talk to other people. Sometimes she feels a little too comfortable with the situation so I browse the realgirls sub and gonewild sub and comment on their bodies and ask for her opinion. In the past she'd call me an asshole for implicitly comparing her with other women but post redpill she ends up fucking me to make me happy.

Repetition of TRP

BE ATTRACTIVE.

DON’T BE TOO ATTACHED. DON’T LIVE IN FANTASY-LAND.

BE HAPPY AT ALL TIMES, LET NO ONE BRING YOU DOWN.

WOMEN ARE GOOD THINGS.

NEVER ENGAGE UNWINNABLE ARGUMENTS.

NEVER GET ANGRY AT RETARDED PEOPLE.

KEEP MOST OF YOUR THOUGHTS INSIDE.

FUCK THE POLICE. LEARN HOW TO PROTECT YOURSELF FROM THEM.

PUT YOURSELF FIRST.

BE PROUD OF YOUR GENDER.

BE PROUD OF YOUR MASCULINITY.

SATISFY YOUR SEX DRIVE.

EMULATE SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE.

STOP READING FEMINIST SHIT I DIDN’T KNOW ANITA’S FUCKING NAME UNTIL I READ ABOUT HER HERE.


[–][deleted] 62 points63 points  (3 children)

This is the best write-up on marriage i've seen here. It perfectly articulates how I try to live my own marriage. Brilliant. Well done, OP!

STOP READING FEMINIST SHIT I DIDN’T KNOW ANITA’S FUCKING NAME UNTIL I READ ABOUT HER HERE.

This really needs to be said more. Most of the feminist rage-inducing crap I hear is through this sub. Let's get real gang, no one, NO ONE, betters themselves in ANY way by finding out which stupid feminist twitter hashtag happens to be trending this week. And I'd be willing to wage more than half a pay-check that the guys posting that kind of crap are more Red Pill neckbeards. Stop cruising twitter when you're bored and instead go for a run or do some pushups--or just shave your neck. Leave hashtags to ineffectual Men's Rights. TRP is about doing. Not whining.

[–]thelidpatrick 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I lost it at "just shave your neck" haven't laughed that hard in weeks.

[–]trpftw 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Favorite quote from OP:

What if your boss asked for input on a problem and you just Agreed and Amplified to absurdity? You'd be canned. But for some reason this shit works with women...

Logic? HAH!

I remember asking an alpha friend for advice on why some women were not being logical towards me... way before TRP was around, and he was telling me: "estrogen is a disease. Without men there would be no logic." I got the sense that some men must have figured out these things for centuries.

[–]ChadThundercockII 0 points1 point  (0 children)

stupid feminist twitter hashtag happens to be trending this week.

This is not a feminist hashtag. Check out # CuckRogen. His wife cuckolded him in twitter. That shit was hilarious.

[–][deleted] 73 points73 points

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[–]rpscrote 8 points9 points  (1 child)

you couldn't pay me to be a woman. I can't even fathom it. Being born a man was the best blessing I could've gotten

[–]JohnnyGameGuy 59 points60 points  (13 children)

I really enjoy reading posts from married men who successfully implement TRP to make marriage work. Like many have said before, marriage is TRP on hard mode. Let's hope you can keep the dreadgame up, and keep it in balance. OP, never stop kicking ass!

[–]ArmyofDumb 4 points4 points [recovered]

I agree that marriage is TRP on hard mode. There is a subreddit for married red-pillers, as well. Once in awhile I get tired of reading the single guy field reports (they're not bad, just don't completely pertain to me).

[–]N0tWithThatAttitude 1 point2 points  (10 children)

What is the link to that subreddit?

[–]1v1mebruh 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Should be in the sidebar in related subs

[–]exotictantra 0 points1 point  (0 children)

can't link to it here but search around or msg

[–]lycanthr0py 97 points97 points [recovered]

As a young, married RP guy, I want to say, that I truly love my wife. She and I are on the journey together and its very rewarding, we might have kids. She's smart and beautiful, not too pushy, and has a body that I go for wih an n count of one highschool dude and me. She sucks my dick unrequested. That said, I will burn this motherfucker (the relationship and all that goes with it) to the ground in the event that I need to. My finger is on the nuke button at all times. I don't care. I'll do it. Then I'll quit my job and do fun stuff and travel, fuck, do drugs, lift and enjoy the decline. I love her and want to spend my life with her, but if she violates my boundaries, I'm done at that moment with no reservations. And she knows, and she loves it. This is comforting for her, and I feel free.

[–]TRPhd 54 points55 points  (5 children)

I will burn this motherfucker (the relationship and all that goes with it) to the ground in the event that I need to

Easier to say before the kids, but much more important to be able to say afterwards.

[–]lycanthr0py 18 points18 points [recovered]

True. The way I see it is that if we have them, then I must keep this attitude to keep my tribe together. If she ultimately decides to break the family, it will not be because I was slacking, it will be raw hypergamous destruction. I can't help that. In that event, I'll do what I can to stay in the kids lives but I won't feel bad if she stops me. I alone judge my behavior, and I only control me. It will be on her. And you can bet I'll explain this to them. The good news is that she understands that her emotional reactions are hers to own. Most of the time.

There just isn't any plugging back in.

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (1 child)

I told my fiancée if she fucks around we're done, kids or not. She mentioned kids blah blah.

Nope. Will never ever trust you again and I don't deserve that shit. One day they'll understand. And it's because I'll tell them.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

/u/ultimatecad is the living embodiment of why it's only as hard as you make it out to be.

[–]1Rumble_in_the_Jungle 20 points21 points  (2 children)

Keeping your finger on the nuke button is a great way to put it. Once you accept "scorching the earth" it gives you a sense of freedom, which in turn leads to easy frame maintennace, which in turn prevents the very fallout so many men are terrified of.

[–]coffee_and_lumber 11 points12 points  (0 children)

This was the biggest revelation for me, realizing that no matter what happens, I'm going to be great, and that life is way too short to put up with other people's unfixable bullshit. This applies to the women in your life, your friends, job, even immediate family in some cases.

[–]WhosCountin 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yeah, not only does it prevent the fallout, but it takes any fear out of that possibility. It's no longer something you work to avoid but rather a weapon you wield so that she has to work to avoid it. And if you do have to walk? You're free to move on to who/what's next. It's freeing rather than making you feel like you've lost all control (which is how I used to feel after breakups)

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (3 children)

Having this frame of mind is important because she knows you're willing to walk away. This gives you the power in the relationship. Women are fragile narcissistic creatures, you let them know you have choices and expect a certain quality from her or you're gone. She will either respect it or get angry. Doesn't matter, as soon as you leave and not call her/return her texts. She will have no choice but to start craving you back because she still needs your approval after you rejected her.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (2 children)

It is almost comical how well this works. I love my wife, she is my best friend. That said, she understands I am willing to chuck her to the curb at a moments notice if she crosses certain lines. Because of this, I get more respect from her.

It wasn't always that way though, we got married young, have a kid etc. It took me a few years before I figured a lot of this stuff out on my own but before that I was beta as fuck in a lot of ways.

Finding TRP really just solidified the things I found out through trial and error and helped with the more nuanced aspects of it all.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (1 child)

Another aspect of this is that since you married young, you captured her when she was her most marketable. You were at your most vulnerable so you behaved as such, which is seen as beta...but I think it's understandable.

Now as you're getting older, she's losing market value and you're gaining value. The tables turn and the mindsets naturally change for your favor. She starts becoming less bitchy and more understanding as her narcissism takes a blow year after year.

I, too, have experienced the same situation as you. Been with mine for 10 years. Amazing how each year I grow further apart and she grows closer to me. Marriage was a way to capture a man young so that if he wondered as his value increased, the woman had power over him to keep him with her.

Feminists fucked up when they attacked marriage. They have no idea that marriage is a safety net for them, they won't know until they're approaching 30 and realize the nerds in school are getting all the hot girls younger than them. The smart girls marry a beta bucks by 25 years of age before men realize their value is increasing.

[–]coffee_and_lumber 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Amazing how each year I grow further apart and she grows closer to me.

Great nugget of truth here.

[–]shuaiya[S] 7 points8 points  (6 children)

I agree that "going nuclear" must always be an option in the background that all parties are aware of which is a wierd thing to say about marriage but that's just TRP and AWALT for you.

[–]Nycredpilldad 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Women are oblivious to the consequences. If they aren't getting the tingles from you, they WILL get it elsewhere & they don't care who they hurt or if they destroy their own lives

[–]1Snivellious 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Somebody here offered me a revelation about this.

Relationships are transactional, which most of us know already. Given that, there are only so many ways to get a partner to do something if they're reluctant, and you're not bribing/compensating them. You can say "do it because it would make me happy", but if they say "that's not enough" you need something else - "do it or I leave".

Even if the threat is implied and never used, it matters to have it there. If "or I leave" isn't on the table, then your partner gets to do anything, even openly cheating, at no consequence beyond knowing you're sad.

[–]juliusstreicher 0 points1 point  (0 children)

at no consequence beyond knowing you're sad.

That is not a consequence, to them; it is a validation point.

[–]coffee_and_lumber 3 points4 points  (0 children)

TRP is natural, meat and potatoes humanity. Marriage is absolutely not. There's no ultimate reason to stay with one woman for your entire life, unless that's something you honestly want for your life.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The problem is girls don't really keep that in mind.

If they want to fuck Chad or embezzle a little money from you she will do it and hamster it away, thinks you will never find out, etc.

They aren't like grown men who weigh risk vs. reward. They weigh feels vs. risk minimized by hamstering.

Like a dude its if risk < reward = do it.

For girls its if feelz > (risk/hamster) = do it

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I like you. Wow. Wisdom. I needed this today.

[–]FearDearg2015 12 points13 points  (8 children)

NEVER BREAK FRAME.

This, a hundred times. In the beginning, you might be faking it til you make it, but by doing that, you are learning how to see the world through your new eyes. Your brain will adapt, and you'll not have to worry so much about "breaking frame" because you'll be TRP on autopilot.

[–]shuaiya[S] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I had a nice advantage here. We have different mother tongues and although we can speak each other's languages pretty well there are still some obvious language barriers. So any time something may have seemed fake or overblown at first I could just laugh it off as a cultural/lingual miscue and immediately switch tactics. But after some months it's just second nature.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Fake it till you become it.

[–][deleted] 2 points2 points

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[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (4 children)

I know how you feel, man. I know exactly how you feel. People like you and I have to dig deep and work hard to improve ourselves, whether it's lifting at the gym or speaking with a professional about our problems. I've learned not to seek help and support from women or girlfriends. If you're alone and need someone, find a friend or a professional. I think it'll help.

[–][deleted] 8 points8 points

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[–]dagadbm 1 point2 points  (2 children)

I have no idea what kind of women you know lol. A lot of posts here just don't resonate with me according with experience with women. I'm guessing its an America thing

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I first noticed it as a teen, and it seems to have gotten worse as I've aged. Genuinely kind women simply have no idea what to do, and the average woman doesn't care because it's a sign of instability that turns them off. No one really prepared me for the sheer lack of empathy I've faced, which was especially shocking because I was raised to believe that women were supposed to be the emotional and nurturing gender. It really is a land of princesses whose concerns begin and end with themselves. All of the women I've dated have been American though, so your mileage may vary.

[–]dark_knight_falling 11 points12 points  (1 child)

So true. I felt the same thing when I applied TRP to my marriage. It just works, and it's scary how well it does.

I was married for about 7-8 years before discovering TRP, and my marriage was... not that great. I was at a point where the sex was stale, we were constantly arguing about every little thing, and I was considering separation.

So, one day I started reading MMSLP by Athol Kay. I read it all in a couple of days and started applying some techniques on my wife right away. I was just amazed of how well it worked. Everything changed immediately. I remember we had sex every day that week. Before, it was 2, 3 times a month, tops. The fights were gone. She was happy all the time.

I didn't even had to change that much. Mostly of what I did was work on my confidence and started paying attention to my needs. Simple things like knowing what I wanted and stating my opinion on stuff made such a huge difference.

It's been 2 years since that change and everything is still working fine.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hats off to married guys who discover TRP after they are locked down. Because the threat of divorce rape skews the balance of power in their relationships, married men, especially ones with attractive wives, are like TRP lab rats. If RP strategies and tactics work for them, they'll definitely work for unmarried guys in LTRs. Keep the FRs coming.

[–]TRPMaidenSlayer 4 points5 points  (2 children)

Great post! I am a "fixer" too, so not fixing every problem and just listening and nodding has been a godsend. Game-changing.

But I still occasionally ask "Are we fixing this or just talking?" when there's complaints about things like work. Sometimes she truly does want advice (but usually... not)

Laughing at the problem

This has been my far most successful strategy lately. It works with my personality, since I truly don't give a fuck about the excessive cleanliness she likes or their need, and it's ultimately very funny to watch someone get emotional about small things when I'm sitting here building something bigger.

Money

I like your strategies, but I like to spend more money on experiences than things. I'll never buy my woman a pair of shoes and she knows that for a fact.

However, as I've become more successful, I've been taking on more and more of the financial role of those experiences. No longer splitting 50/50, but instead, we make the "pain" more equal, which means I can take care of dinner and she can take care of the tip, for instance. It gets to a point where $100 is far more painful to her than to me.

This was the suggestion of a poster elsewhere, and it's working fantastically well.

50/50 splitting was great for me financially when things weren't going as well, but it got to a point where it was more of a hindrance. Funny though, groceries and utilities are still 50/50 though, which honestly isn't fair for her because I eat 2x more :P

Address bad behavior.

I've taken on the funny role here too. Anytime she's being bad, I basically start laughing and half-jokingly tell her, like she's a toddler, "You're being BAD! B - A - D!"

And if she argues, I spell out B - A - D a couple more times.

It's so immature, but it disarms the ENTIRE situation. And I used to try to argue. Now I can just spell three letters and be on my way. Ridiculous.

[–]WhosCountin 0 points1 point  (1 child)

The infantilizing approach to bad behavior is amazingly effective. My girl has always been very submissive in bed, but TRP illuminated the fact that if I extend that treatment to the other rooms and buildings of the world, we're both much happier. She either corrects the misbehavior, or if I'm in the mood it'll quickly progress to spanking and then fucking her... Followed by her correcting whatever got her in trouble to begin with. Upholding standards can definitely be done in an enjoyable way, as long as she knows you're in charge. When I first flipped the power dynamic (it's been an insane 180 since June, thanks TRP!) I had to be much much harder on her and liberally apply dread game, but after even just a week we fell into our natural roles.

Having said all that, there are still times when discipline can't be lighthearted and fun. If I've told her something before (or she does something really mindless/irritating) then it gets serious and I explain that X or Y is unacceptable and she can change it or get out. On occasion she'll still get indignant for a second, and all it takes is a look of "Is this really how you're responding? Not wise." to cut that off immediately.

[–]TRPMaidenSlayer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Having said all that, there are still times when discipline can't be lighthearted and fun.

True -- I didn't even mention this because our incidences of serious arguments has gone down so much that I forgot to bring it up!!

The last time she even got seriously angry at me over small matters (PMS-mode was definitely ON), she said "..and this is why we get into arguments!" -- to which I responded, "No, YOU get into an argument while I stand here laughing"

Which is basically the case. When she gets mad over nonsense, she's now arguing a losing fight with herself. I'm not entering that frame, nooooo way. It's crazy how much it works when it's applied appropriately.

So, for all the bad words TRPers can get called, when the principles are actually applied, everyone is happier and there's ultimately less fighting in a relationship. That's what I love. It's simply more harmonious.

[–]rockstarr 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Been waiting for a level-headed post like this on marriage, glad to see it.

[–]timebeast69 19 points20 points  (39 children)

don't look at porn... of any kind. it makes you weak as hell and pathetic. the energy you waste on that could be spent on improving yourself

[–][deleted] 19 points20 points  (19 children)

giving up porn and masturbation has changed my life one thousand times for the better. I knew it needed to be done and this year I made it happen.

[–]10211799107 10 points11 points  (18 children)

Man I've stopped porn and masturbation since last Thursday. Joined #nonothingnovember and so far I'm getting random boners at work and gym. It's cool, but awkward.

[–]coffee_and_lumber 5 points6 points  (16 children)

To each his own. I have to keep the valves relieved at least once daily, sometimes two or three times just to feel normal and functional. I'm nearly 39 and still often end up fucking the wife twice in a row to feel right. Beating off is just something to keep from turning into a wild animal. This has only gotten worse the more in shape and supplemented I am.

Porn-wise, I keep a healthy collection of my wife in the rotation of other porn with chicks that basically look like my wife.

[–]cariboo_j 3 points4 points  (13 children)

Yeah nofappers are nuts. I gotta jack off at least once per day otherwise I'll have constant random boners.

Men are literally physically addicted to sex.

[–]timebeast69 5 points6 points  (10 children)

yes men like sex, and your brain will do just about anything to get it. when your brain is subjected to porn and jacking off on a constant basis it is very easy and you don't have to do anything. if you stop, your brain is going to start figuring out how to get sex from women, doing whatever it takes, getting fit, confident, etc. and personally, that is much more preferable to watching some disgusting dude fuck some vapid whore.

[–]cariboo_j 0 points1 point  (9 children)

I guess it depends what you want out of life. I already have a decent paying job and lift weights. Objectively my SMV is pretty good.

Had lots of sex in the past. Mostly LTR's but a few casual relationships too.

At this point I'd rather work on my hobbies and hang out with my bros. No interest in casual sex with multiple plates. Getting laid isn't some prize I'm pursuing. Maybe sometime in the future.

LTR's and even spinning plates TRP style is a lot of work. Plus there's always risks of STD's and pregnancy. Plus wearing condoms isn't that great.

So yeah, I'd rather wank off to porn and be done with it.

If nofappers want to avoid porn and masturbation good for them, but I think they're turning getting laid into some prize they're working towards. Putting it on a pedestal, if you will.

If you're just casually having sex with some girl you don't care about, you're essentially using her as a drug to get that dopamine hit. It's not that much different than wanking off to porn imo. If you pump and dump some girl for a couple months then never talk to her again, how much lasting value does that really add to your life?

[–]timebeast69 0 points1 point  (8 children)

yeah that's your hamster wheel spinning if I've ever heard it. think what you want but that is a very blue-pill attitude. stop jacking it to whores and you will become stronger. PERIOD.

[–]cariboo_j 0 points1 point  (7 children)

Well, I'll leave you with this video to watch by PaulProteus.

MGTOW. It's not as entertaining as it used to be.

MGTOW appeals to a lot of guys for a reason...

[–]timebeast69 0 points1 point  (6 children)

Everybody knows that woman are just a distraction. Doesn't mean you have to be a slave to porn.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fapping causes the random Bs. Abstain for long enough and it will require legitimate sexual experiences to get them.

[–]exotictantra 0 points1 point  (0 children)

damn.. same here. been fapping since I was 12-13 and its only gotten worse and I can still fuck most times.

having said that if I am busy or on holidays, I rarely feel the need to fap but i still want to fuck.

[–]cariboo_j 8 points9 points  (2 children)

If you complete 30 years of nofap you get wizard powers

[–]timebeast69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

pretty sure that's what you get if you give up sex altogether. which is very different.

[–]1scissor_me_timbers00 0 points1 point  (0 children)

level 13 nofap mage, checkin in. On my way to wizard status

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree. That part of OPs post stood out as a bizarre thing to do. The existence of hot women on the internet doesn't make you alpha.

[–]LazyMagus 0 points1 point  (1 child)

True. If OP wants to challenge his wife, he could take her out and show her other real women?

[–]timebeast69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this. you'd be amazed how horny women get watching you interact with other women. (especially their sister)

[–]LazyMagus 2 points3 points  (7 children)

Cool post. I like the points at the end that were not actually a summary of the post; almost like post credit movie scenes. Good focus on mental state improvement.

OP, you very confidently said that marriage doesn't need to let government in, but failed mention your nationality.

I am not going to assume you are American since most other Americans here rightly hate current system of marriage.

Excellent post again.

[–]shuaiya[S] 1 point2 points  (6 children)

I'm American and I hate the system too. I hate having a threesome with uncle sam. We're both atheist and didn't have a wedding in a church. And I don't think anything except a verbal agreement is needed to confirm a LTR. The concept is archaic. Simply cohabitating is enough. Most lawyers say that we only actually need a marriage system in order to have a way to quantify compensation for child raising etc in the event of a split. smh. But I love my wife and marriages has perks, I don't regret it.

[–]LazyMagus 0 points1 point  (5 children)

Of course you shouldn't regret it. It's in the past now. You can only be grateful that you are making the best out of it.

But what kind of perks of marriage are you talking about, apart from the loan and 'career connection' stuff?

[–]shuaiya[S] 2 points3 points  (4 children)

I discovered TRP while engaged and still wanted to get married.
-financial incentives
-a larger family with hopefully cool people
-two dads
-"family man" appearance to the general public
-unprotected sex with no STI risks
-support if I break my leg or something
-more visa options for her and me (I'm American she isn't)
-even a modest wedding/reception can be a good time party with the right families and friends
-sex nearly any time you want it
-love

[–]LazyMagus 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Sounds good. Last two points are not the perks of marriage. They are the perks of shit well handled. :)

[–]dj10show 1 point2 points  (1 child)

-support if you break your leg

Not sure if I'd bank on that

[–]Drunkenpolyanarchist 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This requires a foundation laid prior. Brifaults law is in full effect. She's seen the results and won't lose those benefits over a temporary set back.

[–]DONT_reply_with_THIS 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So she's getting a green card/citizenship because she married you? sounds like a good deal for her.

Also there is a low STI risk, you're assuming she's never going to cheat. Keep up the good work and it may never happen, or it still will. AWALT and all.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

You sound like the kind of man women want to marry! My husband has always been very much like this, naturally he is a pro at this. We have been married for 12 years very happily and I credit his masculine disposition for much of it. I respect him and want him to be pleased with his family and home when he is not working. He will entertain my female nature and listen if I have a problem but then it's up to me to take his advice or resolve it on my own. I always try to keep the home clean and organized so that he is free to relax and enjoy being at home with us. I do not ever nag him about household chores! I respect his decisions with money or jobs or any other major decisions. He will ask my opinion but ultimately leave the final call up to him. He treats me to wonderful things including the pets I like, vacations and a luxury car largely because I treat him well and he enjoys indulging me, I am grateful and show my gratitude. If I demanded these things and acted with entitlement he would definitely not tolerate such disrespect. I try every day to do what I can to make his day go as smoothly as possible. I maintain my fitness and appearance.

I see so many marriages fail so dramatically and now that I have Understanding of the masculine feminine complimentary dynamic, the cause is quite clear. Women who behave as is accepted now disrupt the natural order of how men and women are naturally wired to respond. Women become demanding and spoiled, feeling that dominating their husband shows their strength, that it somehow makes them more powerful. But it destroys communication and erodes respect. Men become resentful and frustrated, feel inadequate with constant disrespect and derision. Men coming home from working all day to a bitchy wife nagging about dishes and laundry after she stayed home all day is not how marriage is supposed to work.

I like my husband to come home to a peaceful environment. I ask him about his work and offer him a drink or snack then I back off and let him have some time to himself. I may text hi while he is out and just ask what he would like for dinner or if I can run any errands for him. Or just to let him know what I will be doing. If he does not respond immediately I do not send barrage of texts interrogating him. I simply assume he has things that require his attention and I wait to hear back fromhimat his convenience. I never expect him to cater to any unimportant feelings or issues I may be experiencing while he is busy!

People always wonder how we have been able to stay married despite all the challenges we have faced and this is the main factor. We genuinely enjoy one a others companionship and a huge part of that is accepting each other entirely and treating each other with respect.

[–]neocelt 7 points8 points  (3 children)

"Fuck the police"

Lol, that was out of nowhere. True but lol'd

[–]Namkcalb 0 points0 points [recovered]

"Fuck the police"

You know, there's probably a porno or two showing just that.

[–]juliusstreicher 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, but, now, everybody's afraid to fap to it!

[–]hebola4lyfe 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank your will to follow common sense.

It was YOU who chose to follow your common sense and logic. TRP simply reminds you about them .

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (4 children)

Never break frame

This is key. But it's exhausting in marriage. You have to be on all the time. You realize to properly dread your wife that your going to miss out on putting your kids to bed as you go to a soiree, throw some back with your bros or just hit the gym.

The last 6 months of my marriage I thought I had the entire thing licked. Getting sex 3 times a week and some BJs thrown in for good measure. Then my ex threw in some hail mary shit test to see if it was for real and I just divorced her. About 8k in lawyer fees and 24K out of my 401K and it's worth not being 'ON' all the time.

My only mistake was telling her I wouldn't sleep with other chicks until the D was final. For about 2 months we had some off the best sex until I said sure. Then she F-ed her dick in a jar the next week. Like, how could I not have seen that coming? Shit.

I'm so not about getting married. Marriage is either the best or worst thing that can happen to a man. But with the way women are incentivivized to be terrible it's not worth the gamble

[–]Jamtastic1 2 points2 points [recovered]

Sounds like you made the same mistake I did and married a horrible human being. If I hadn't been a doormat of a man when I was dating my ex-wife, I wouldn't have married her. Would you have married yours?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

She would have left if I had put my foot down.she was hot enough to get a beta... and I was one the blue side of purple in a red wrapper. she's got a beta schmuck now.

I had a bad case of awalt. If there all like this might as well get started early. Wanted to have kids before 30

[–]HS-Thompson 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Did you just kind of randomly string together a bunch of red pill terms in a row, like a word salad or something? I have no idea what this post is trying to say. What is a bad case of awalt?

[–]juliusstreicher 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's the same as TRP in the MGTOW, adding a little PUA and HB10s into the mix. You'll need to IOI to understand all of this AF. Read the sidebar!

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

TRP saved me and my marriage and made her a happier woman.

[–]EnlightenedViking 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Fuck the Police.

Great post

[–]Dustin_Bromain 1 point2 points  (7 children)

Question: This should work for LTR's too, right? I'm considering getting into a LTR in the near-future.

[–]shuaiya[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do you gain something from LTR that is better than not being in one? Very little changes imo except the "dread game" and "break-up" aspects. In a meaningless girl situation you lose nothing and gain quite a lot from leaving her on the curb which makes it so easy to put your money where your mouth is. In LTR you can lose friends, time, things, and more. Is your dread game just bluffing then? She'll call it. Can you walk away from the whole thing and kick her out in the middle of the night? Can you maintain that frame of mind? You should be able to because you don't need anything but yourself.

[–]FearDearg2015 2 points3 points  (4 children)

What the fuck is a short term long term relationship?

[–]Dustin_Bromain 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Whoops. That was a typo/brain fart. My bad.

[–]Fubarro205 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The truth is strong in this one lads. He may be TRP Neo. Bravo sir. Your post echoes my own sentiments to the Tee.

[–]R3v4mp3d 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Initially I wanted to write a bit about giving gifts and accepting the nagging. As I finished your post I loved the "zen state" you're in so much that I said "fuck it".

Good job man! Keep it up and down the notch on those gifts a bit and I'm sure you'll keep living like a king!

Your final ideas are golden:

WOMEN ARE GOOD THINGS. NEVER ENGAGE UNWINNABLE ARGUMENTS. NEVER GET ANGRY AT RETARDED PEOPLE.

[–]zandd23 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Outstanding post "Firmly deflecting complaints is like playful spanking in bed." Gold.

[–]spookyman212 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is a great post. I'm glad to see someone is practicing TRP in a LTR. Great advice.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I browse the realgirls sub and gonewild sub and comment on their bodies and ask for her opinion.

You browse reddit with your wife? She knows your username?

[–]tb87670 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Coming here to say I'm happy for ya OP. My brother is married and the past week I started slipping him some Red Pill advice when I can. And guess what? Recently saw him with his wife and they both seemed happy. And he reported he's getting morning BJ's now. Marriage isn't for all, but I am glad that TRP can save a marriage that might be on the rocks for some people.

[–]AnonymousAndLovinIt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Sometimes after work I actually feel too tired to have enjoyable sex but I unfailingly just muster the energy from somewhere and do the deed. "

Wait, so coming home too tired is breaking frame?

[–]Drenmar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is why Reddit hates TRP, it just fucking works.

[–][deleted] -4 points-3 points  (2 children)

Never get married. Ever.

It blows my mind that any male would ever sign a marriage contract. It's a losing bet.

Edit: Very surprised I got downvoted for saying "don't get married" on TRP. But, all the downvotes in the world are worth it if it saves just one guy from getting his life ruined in a divorce.

[–][deleted] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

You forget that a lot of guys discover trp after getting married.

[–]TRPhd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can marry her if she's richer. If it costs her to divorce you then it's to your benefit. "Cheat and Grow Rich"... fuck her if she goes all starfish on you. The only thing is if you have kids she can cut off access, but other than that, you're winning.

[–]amazzy -1 points0 points  (0 children)

WOW I f***** love this. Just stumbled on this sub after breaking up with a girl I lived with (she cheated, was also too young for our relationship, blah blah), this has helped me feel waay less shitty about the whole thing. Going to utilize this advice on the next one.

[–]Wildlos -1 points0 points  (0 children)

So how long have you been married? Kids?