Red Pill TheoryMasculine Needs Form a Hierarchy. Design Your Life Accordingly. (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by [deleted]


A big mistake I made in my youth was assuming there aren’t any rules to life. As long as I wasn’t getting arrested or expelled from school, I thought I was free to “create my life” however I saw fit. Much of this came from having a big ego and living in a sheltered suburb. Though, a Progressive-Liberal worldview that viewed “traditional thinking” as a Sin provided a philosophical backing for some of my misadventures.

In reality, humans have needs that have to be met (no questions asked) before they can move onto the higher parts of life. These needs form a pyramid structure with survival-level requirements (food, shelter, safety) at the base and self-actualization (you could also call it “spirituality”) at the top. In the middle are the activities that most people spend their whole lives pursuing - career, relationships, fitness, etc. Studying Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs is a good place to start when considering this concept.

I don't bring up needs-fulfillment as some kind of abstract intellectual exercise. Rather, in a very practical sense, this is how humans function (for the most part). If you are missing multiple lower-order needs, you will find it very difficult to satisfy loftier desires over the long term.


Let’s say you want to start a business in your free time. You have a good idea and hope that after a couple years investment, you’ll be able to leave your day job and pursue this passion project full time. And yet, no matter how good your idea seems on paper, you have trouble focusing night after night on getting the work done. Sometimes you even start to doubt your overall vision and get frustrated.

What often happens in these types of situations is the person has fixated on a higher-order need (becoming a successful entrepreneur) while ignoring more “mundane” aspects of life like health and sexuality. Especially if you are of the achiever mindset, it can be tempting to try and skip over the baser parts of existence in an attempt to gain riches and quickly cement your name in the history books. Nature does not take kindly to these types of cheaters, however.

The would-be entrepreneur who lives a lethargic lifestyle squanders massive amounts of energy. His poor health habits reduce his focus and productivity, and thus directly harm his business. This would-be entrepreneur also will subconsciously dislike himself for being out of shape and lazy. Anxiety about his health produces cognitive dissonance, making the problem even worse. How can you tout your credentials as a leader to potential investors if you can’t even motivate yourself to go to the gym three times a week? If this man keeps ignoring his fitness needs, part of him will always feel like a phony while giving pitches.

Now, you might say, “Sure, but lots of successful people are out of shape. Look at Winston Churchill or Chris Christie.” Exceptions here and there don’t disprove the fact that a hierarchical ordering of needs is the strongest and most consistent way to approach life-satisfaction. Christie may be fat, but I can bet you that his other needs are being more than fulfilled. It’s fun being the Governor of a historically corrupt state.

What Does This Mean In Reality?

If you want to be great at something - make sure you’ve mastered the “lower levels” of life first. In order to function at maximum productivity, you need to (this is just a sample, one could add more to each category):

Survival Level:

  • Have a clean and well lit living space

  • Make enough money to live without excessive stress

  • Have clothes that are comfortable, fit well, and look reasonable

  • Consistently eat nutritious and balanced meals

Middle Level:

  • Have enough of a social life to never feel lonely and to stay connected with others

  • Be in the dating game, so you can release sexual tension now and then and enjoy the company of the opposite polarity

  • Get regular exercise

  • Have a regular work schedule that gives you a sense of routine during the day

Higher Level

  • Start to think about questions like “who am I?” and “what do I stand for?”

  • Identify your values - what really matters to you, and what can you live without?

If any of these needs are glaring holes for you, it will be much more difficult to become elite at whatever skill or profession you desire. Often times we can be completely blind to the things holding us back. It sounds ridiculous in retrospect, but there was a period of time where I wanted to write after work, but couldn’t seem to bring myself to do it most nights. My lack of motivation was distressing me, but you know what the problem was?

I didn’t own a desk.

Pathetic, I know. I had recently moved and was taking my time with the whole setting up the new house deal. I was sick of putting together furniture, and just didn’t want to deal, so I was going to coffee shops after work, writing on the couch, or really anywhere else I could sit. Every single night I had to waste energy thinking: “OK where am I going to work tonight? The coffee shop? Eh, their Wi-Fi was shoddy last time. Maybe the couch? Damn the roommates are already sitting there.” This internal monologue was a big wast of time, and combined with the fact that I was already a bit tired from working earlier in the day, it always shifted the odds towards "not working tonight. Going to surf the internet instead.”

Once I realized my problem, I bought a good desk, swivel chair, and lamp to go with it. Suddenly, writing became 10x easier. Who would’ve thought? This is kind of an extreme example - most people probably wouldn’t be this stupid to try and write without a desk - but it illustrates a larger point. If you aren’t taking care of your basic needs, you can’t reasonably expect to progress onto the next levels of life.

Be honest with yourself. Where are you slacking right now? And do you notice a connection between your laziness in this area and other parts of your life? Is your diet of fast food crushing your energy levels, which in turn is hurting your performance at work? Is your fear of approaching women making you sexually frustrated and therefore uninspired about life in general? Is your Netflix addiction throwing off your sleeping habits and making you feel rushed and anxious each morning? Identifying bad habits is just part of the equation. You then need to track how your inability to fulfill the more basic needs impacts other parts of your life.

Staying Grounded

I like how viewing life as a hierarchy of needs keeps me grounded. I take care of business during the day, working from 9 to 5:30 to secure the money I need for food, shelter, electricity, and everything else. After work I take care of my health needs by swimming laps, playing basketball, or working out. In between, I pay the bills, get car maintenance done, do my laundry, and clean up my room.

Early in the night I can often be found socializing with friends or going on Tinder dates. Now, I am not perfect in any of the categories thus far mentioned, but they are all things on my mind that I seek to take care of before sitting down to write posts like these.

Why? You may ask. Well, who the hell am I to come on a men’s self improvement subreddit and give advice if I don’t follow it myself? That’s a fake way to live, for sure. But it’s not only that. As I’ve said, I've found that locking down the lower-level needs subconsciously gives one permission to explore the higher parts of life. If you’re effortlessly taking care of the “mundane” parts of life, then starting a side business suddenly isn’t unrealistic, or even that hard. You actually have excess energy since you are living well, and also will pick up numerous side benefits from your lifestyle. Your success at your day job gives you contacts who can help you out. Your sexual prowess gives you the confidence to see yourself as a leader who knows what he wants. And so on - it all snowballs.

Furthermore, I talk about controversial ideas a lot like the New World Order. I assert that a brainwashing program is currently being used against the American populace, which at first appears to be an unhinged claim. And I’ve learned it is kind of unhinged to make such statements - even if they are backed up by copious evidence - if you’re not balling out in the rest of your life.

You could be totally correct about the New World Order, but if you’re a fat neckbeard, that really shouldn’t be your biggest concern in life. If you want to participate in the culture war at that level (or do anything at a high level, really) you better be able to back it up by being a high functioning person across the board. If you are, then nobody can really touch you.

What’s the Point of this Post?

You might be thinking, “This guy just told me the secret of life is to be good at everything. What the hell?” That’s not the point. The point is that to achieve great things, you must start at the base and then build upwards. If you are struggling with women, instead of trying to memorize more pick up lines and PUA tricks, ask yourself if you’ve mastered the lower levels:

-Are you in good shape?

-Are you well dressed?

-Do you have enough money to enjoy a night out?

-Does your social circle give you ample opportunities to meet new people?

Once you master these needs, you’ll be surprised at how much easier it is to hold Frame. Then you’ll actually KNOW you deserve love and recognition, instead of trying to trick people into giving it to you.

My blog is http://legendary-peace.com/

[–]judethedude 54 points55 points  (49 children)

Hey legendary great post, seems like I agree with almost everything you post on TRP.

Question for you that comes from personal experience: How do you deal with addictive behaviour that seems to constantly undermine your ability to keep your survival/low level needs met?

Personally, I can't seem to shake league of legends (sounds stupid I know) but even when I cold turkey it for months it seems I can still be sucked in easily. Now that I write it out it probably seems like I should just cut it out completely since it adds very little value...

[–]idahar[🍰] 38 points39 points  (10 children)

Hey, I thought I'd give my 2 cents on it.

Currently your brain associates League of Legends with a high level of stimulation, so your natural response is to want to play it. The rush of outplaying opponents, doing well, and seeing the victory screen are all contributing factors to the dopamine levels in your body.

Attempting to go cold turkey on things such as games are difficult for most people, because unlike crack cocaine and heroin, you don't associate it with crippling addiction and self-destructive behaviour, so you don't feel it's all that bad.

Instead of dropping it and attempting to completely ignore it, try to settle into other things. Gym is definitely one. Another is to find a group of people to join for activities/general fun. If computer games are your thing, set a time limit personally and try to gain something from it. Unfortunately, because LoL is a team game with other people being able to influence your outcome, it's never a sure thing to achieve ranking up in 5 hours of play over a weekend or the like.

Overall, find small things in your life that you find enjoyable and try to invest time into them and make it worthwhile, which will in turn cause you to prioritize them over LoL.

I am addicted to playing games, but I found out that I really like comedy and making content, so I wound up spending a large portion of my time creating content, which involved writing scripts, learning Premiere, Photoshop and aftereffects, not to mention it involved me getting over certain speech impediments and learning how to work with large groups of people. Now my time playing games are strictly limited for what I consider "work" and enjoying with friends on certain occasions.

[–]bp000 22 points22 points [recovered]

You have to man up and cold turkey it. Just do it. It will suck, but just remove it, delete your accounts, and delete your CDs. I got into an MMO in 8th grade/ high school and was so addicted to it that was all I ever did to the point I looked like Rosie O'Donnel. I was damn good at it, but what a waste of space I was.

Then one day I came to, threw all that shit in the trash and joined the wrestling team for the asswhooping I desperately needed.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (3 children)

replace "asswhooping" with oilchecking, and Ill believe you

[–]bp000 13 points13 points [recovered]

That is a comment a woman would make.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Hey now, I don't judge if youve switched teams more than once. Whos keeping track?

[–]Ishouldbeproducing 1 point2 points  (3 children)

Funny thing is I'm doing the same as instead of playing games. Do you have any great recommendations for learning some styles or tips and tricks for Premiere? I've just been getting into make weird studio videos and want to edit but I can never really find any great sites.

[–]idahar[🍰] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's really hard to find someone who's willing to point you in the right direction or help you because they might want to keep the competition low. I watched a lot of youtube videos on editing Premiere and using after effects. There are entire series dedicated to editing ability, I'd just say find the one that suits you and start jotting down notes. After you know the basics, it's up to you to play with the creative aspect.

[–]smfc 1 point2 points  (0 children)

it's all about dopamine. thats what everyone wants in this world no matter what they have to do to get it. those rushes of dopamine are what drive humans to do what they do.

[–][deleted] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

How do you deal with addictive behaviour that seems to constantly undermine your ability to keep your survival/low level needs met?

You have to bring addictions to the "light." You need to see them for what they actually are instead of relying on half-truths and hampster-wheel excuses.

At their core, addictions are a drive towards death.

The hampster says: "But playing computer games is sooo fun, and gives me the illusion of having friends."

Look at the situation more logically. Almost like a math equation.

INPUT = Hours of gaming

OUTPUT = Survival level needs not met (resulting in pain)

You cause yourself pain, on purpose.

It doesn't matter how many flashing lights and dopamine releases the game gives you. Playing it continuously actually affirms you're having trouble surviving (i.e. meeting very basic needs) on this planet.

Why do humans do this to themselves? Well, we are complicated and have shadow aspects of our personality that say "Fuck life."

[–]SHITS_ON_OP 13 points14 points  (1 child)

you're probably replacing it with other addictive needs like surfing the internet or other games, or food drugs or alcohol, or tv, just having a smartphone adds to addictive behavior. my long term goal is to cut out my smartphone and my internet and cable, and just read books if i want something to do that's not working. i think being bored is a muscle, and when you fill it with mindless entertainment, it weakens that muscle. when i was a kid, after i ran out of things to watch on TV, i would do my homework, but only when i literally had nothing else to do. now i always have something to do because of endless internet so i don't improve myself. i would think a lot on bus rides. now im constantly distracted by my smart phone. so now i'm never bored, and that muscle is so weak when compared to when i was a kid. im constantly in need of stimulation. cutting it out and being bored is incredibly painful because you haven't been bored in years, just like if you haven't done push ups in years. but i think you get used to it over time and it strengthens you and it forces you to go out and do things that you wouldn't do other wise if you just sat on your ass and watched TV.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

this is what makes me tempted to get a dumb phone.

Unfortunately I need work email. Maybe there's a way to disable everything else?

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

The way you beat addictions is by getting up close and personal with them, understanding their consequence and consciously keep track of them as they build up. You have to give your brain all the relevant information to be able to make an informed decision, your brain is not stupid, you are.

People can't break out of addictions because they skip the feeling shitty part after binging. For games the usual way of "blocking" thinking about consequences is either work or pot + snacks. Work gets you to the weekend and pot gets you to the next day. The brain never consciously grasps the concept of consequences which is why you'll often hear people say "I don't know what's wrong with me", "I don't know how he did it, I wish I could do the same" etc. Well, the only real difference between addicts and non-addicts is that addicts lie by omission, to themselves.

At some point this becomes a physical manifestation which is when it gets really scary and becomes a do or die situation. Good news is that gaming by itself isn't sufficient to get to that point, you usually need some other hard physical addiction to completely disarm your wits which is why vape n' vidia is so deadly.

What does this mean in reality?

Take your average 10 hour weekend League/Dota binge.

At the end, right before passing out of exhaustion, this is how you feel on average:

  • You probably have some form of headache from staring at a screen for 10 hours.
  • Your eyes aren't able to focus properly. You're probably a bit dehydrated.
  • You're sweaty and your ears hurt too.
  • You stuffed your face with a pizza or 2 and some energy drinks/sodas because your lazy ass didn't want to move.

  • Your "insert-variation-of-ladder-score" may be went up, may be went down but on average probably remained the same. Worse yet all you did was play some fighting game with your mates which literally has no possibility of any kind of progression.

  • You probably skipped on a few important things you had to do coz fuck it.

  • You were probably going to work on that thing that you had an interest in but gaming got in the way.

and so on...

The point is, if you think about each one of these things consciously on a regular basis your behavior WILL change because that's just how the brain works. It's a machine that rearranges itself based on feedback, if you give it the feedback it WILL be affected accordingly. When you feel shitty after a binge session your brain will record the experience and remind you of it the next time you're about to go on a binge because the brain doesn't like feeling shitty. That's basically called negative reinforcement.

On the flip side, there is positive reinforcement. Which is basically you "binge" on something but don't feel shit afterwards. This might be solving some problem, studying some science, working on a business idea or a hobby etc. If you spend 10 hours on a Sunday working on a subject of interest you will feel absolutely fucking amazing and your brain will record that experience too. Wouldn't it be great to have an experience similar (or better) to binge gaming but not feel shit afterwards, or better yet feel better than before.

Having said that you have to maintain a balance which really just comes back to providing feedback to your body and then paying attention to the results.

[–]SmilingWatermelon 7 points8 points  (6 children)

Bro. I completely relate. On platinum level on league and the dopamine rush I get from people complimenting me makes me still want to play it. Understand how it effects your brain. Be completely aware.

Understand that outside of a computer screen, it has no value. Replace the hobby with something else. I tried picking up guitar. You need to get your dopamine rush from other sources.

[–]MastodonMonkey 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Isn't life a computer screen?

[–]TurduckenII 3 points4 points  (1 child)

It can be just as satisfying, if not more so. When you quit an addictive game or pursuit (gambling, shopping, LoL, WoW, reddit, phone games, etc) and do life, then it feels like you're starting over. Do you want to go from level 60 to level 10? The rewards you get from your investment in gaming are so much more than the rewards you get from life when you've put so much more into gaming than life.

The solution is to find a system that works for you that will allow you to use willpower as little as possible until it is stronger. Delete account from LoL rather than saying you won't play. Then you need to improve your life to a degree where you're actually getting pleasure from it so that LoL has less pull on you. If you quit LoL and then stagnate in your job, hobbies, fitness etc, you'll just relapse because you didn't make a difference. Relapse happens faster when you rely on willpower instead of passive systems. Willpower can be trained but it takes some time and a lot of failures, and systems help you train willpower at its appropriate level.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

At my lowest level i'd play 8 hours of LoL a day for a year+ while being that useless waste of space. When i wanted to get rid of it i'd just play other games so i was non the wiser. Then i started getting interested in the stuff i got into studying (web design) and started to shrink the gaming time accordingly. Nowadays i do around a game a day, still have to leave it behind, but i don't dream of weird outplays anymore (literally, in REM phase i'd play dreamed LoL outplays and i remember always asking myself: "wait, i'm dreaming or am i playing?) and make time for other things.. Still hard to drop it if all the rest is not set and i know an hour is still a waste. For the couple years i nerded heavy i got into master tier and played with the best including Apdo and his smurf-band and so far no woman (admittedly i don't hang with bombshells or higher than 7) has been able to give me the same ego-boost through sex or seduction than having Apdo asking me to carry his ars lol. I'd be the true tryhard (got in master with about 25 fps, 15 on teamfights).

Lately when i play i do to kill time and if i suck i don't care. Honestly i now look at those highs in a very suspicious manner. They were good but knowing to be able to walk on a balance give me more interior peace.

There is one way that lol helped me recover though, and it's knowing that if i was in Korea i'd probably get sucked for free by some cutie (it's not like i'm exaggerating... the korean soccer national had the top starcraft players to come at the game just to boost team morale). Now it may be a silly thought, but at the time (1 year+ ago) it helped me put things in perspective. Was 25 with 2 uggo lays before and this kind of thinking helped me understand how value is really relative and that is way more about adaption to your current informal scripts on the way to your goals. "Real" value is an illusion, if we were a society of birds the macho bad boy would basically be an omega without the beta skills on which female birds select for. I suppose that was the start of my "formlessness".

On the other side my lol addiction had started out of a heavily depressive phase so i think if it wasn't lol it could really be heroin or heremitage. Considering i had no idea of any better than killing myself and never wanted psyco help or drugs it was my personal "painkiller" until i regained my mind, which rejoined me a while ago (thanks to trp too). I hardly believe any of the 7+ hours-a-day guys do it because it's really their vocation rather than to escape what is perceived as a nightmarish reality with little possible improvement.

If you understand that you could likely be a rockstar if you were born the son of Paul McCartney, or a corrupt politician if you were the son of Bush, or whatever you think impossible for you to become (ideologically too), you are on you way to "formlessness" which is the basis to develop the forms you prefer.

[–]TRPdis 1 point2 points  (2 children)

The most tragic part about this whole thing, is that our generation is probably the last or second to last one where being good at video games won't increase your social or monetary value (it already does for the top 1% though). More and more girls are getting into games, and I can totally imagine in a not so distant future, the platinum level league player will be sitting right along side the cool hipster, the weed dealer and the accepted minority on the cool kids' tables in high schools all across America. Only the star ball player and the rich and good looking prep kid will be higher.

In the future, being good at games will bring value into life, but we're about 50 years early for that.

[–]SmilingWatermelon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your right but the trade off isnt worth it. Look at pro gamers. Physically, they are disgusting.

Looking like them to get good at a game isnt worth getting gamer chicks. I've been with one before, they have poor hygiene.

[–]fruxzak 7 points7 points [recovered]

League ruined my university career. I've gotten it back on track now, but I'm way behind where I could have been.

Once I quit league, my life seemed much easier to manage. For me, it was the conscious realization that LoL didn't really matter to me at all. I stopped thinking that I needed to hit diamond 1, and started thinking that my rank in league was probably the most inconsequential thing in my life. That mentality helped me quit and quit permanently.

If you tie your self worth to how good you are at the game, it is hard to give it up. If you believe that the game doesn't matter to you, it's easy to cull out of your life.

[–]_the_shape_ 4 points5 points  (2 children)

I'd argue that you can't cut it out because you don't know what you're cutting it out for. A void is consequently created through your elimination of the said addictive behavior, but nothing is being harvested in its place.

It's likely you subconsciously still live your life in the pursuit of happiness (i.e. gratification). I wouldn't say there's anything necessarily wrong with this, but I'd argue that there's higher than this, greater than this. Happiness is the byproduct of achieving things. Work relentlessly to become a man consistently in the pursuit of achievement, and let happiness come to you naturally as a result.

Organize and rearrange your life in the pursuit of new virtues. "Achievement" really is both the means and the end, but the means to get there typically feature "strength", "power", "freedom", "self-control", "discipline", "perseverance", "boldness", "will-power" - look for ways to implement these into your day-to-day life in every which way that you can. Example - making your bed first thing in the morning, every single day, not only honors and nurtures discipline, it gives nourishment to "achievement" too, albeit on a small scale. The same applies to your body - you strengthen it in the gym (raw, physical power) in addition to strengthening every other virtue I listed above. Allow virtues such as these to serve as your compass in everything that you do until they become instinct. Your habits add up to make up who you presently are, so always keep a lookout for methods to merge your habits with virtues like the ones I listed above.

Although there are a variety of ways to achieve the same thing, the idea I propose is to not fight the addiction head-on, but obliquely. Starve it to death. Instead of a super-charged hatred for it, defeat it with a dismissive "what use do I have for you? None".

The optimal way to reach that point is by reinventing yourself and becoming a new man. Lucky for you, the tools are readily available for you here @ TRP. I trust that you know what you have to do next..

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Your habits add up to make up who you presently are

This is great right here.

The little things that we don/don't do on a daily basis including the thoughts that we entertain, make up the quality and substance of our lives.

[–]judethedude 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey I've received numerous replies from my comment but this one hit home hardest for me.

[–]madeaccforthiss 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Take out your video card and sell it. You have to be honest to yourself, if you will slip back into old habits then you must make those habits less accessible.

"I want to play LOL, let me just install it real quick" is much different than "I want to play LOL, let me spend 2 hours getting a video card.".

[–]p3n1x 3 points4 points  (1 child)

How do you deal with addictive behaviour that seems to constantly undermine your ability to keep your survival/low level needs met?

Replace the behavior with multiple sub behaviors. New experiences if possible. Lets say you spend 20hrs or so on LoL. Find 4 activities, give them each 5 hours a week. Do this for at least 3 months. Watch all that new pussy replace LoL.

Is it EASY? For some yes, others no. We don't do new things because we challenge the entertainment value & quality of the new versus the old-comfortable. This is where our brains and bacteria lie to us. When Entertainment Complacency takes over.

Best way to start is a class, or something that is not run and operated by you. The only requirement is that you show up. Force yourself into a situation where you will be wasting money or hurting your reputation if 'ditch' your new activity. Failure is acceptable, quitting is not. You sucked at your video game when you started, accept you might suck at your new adventure. Just make sure to channel that competitive nature into the new task.

Learn to Salsa for example. (Exercise and hot ass chicks)

Go to Toastmasters meetings. (Learn to express your power through voice control)

Learn a new language.

Hell, learn to day trade.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There's a lot we could do outside of our vices. I like to watch movies and listen to music and as a result I've been going outside a LOT less than I used to before. My body is suffering because of this...I've put on some padding, but I'm not fat, just some extra padding on my stomach. I saw a picture of myself from about 5 years ago and I was really in shape. Strong jaw line showing and absolutely no baby beer gut like I have going on now. It's unacceptable and it's a result of me not being aware of what I was doing to myself.

[–]Syll0gism 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As I read the first part of your post I thought about how much time I spend on League of Legends as well, funny we have the same problem.

[–]optimumone 2 points3 points  (0 children)


I had to add something here. You should not "shake" LOL, but use your addiction to your advantage. You can train yourself to like things you did not previously like or dislike things once like, once you understand your motivations.

Reward yourself with an hour or two of LOL after you have done the things you need to improve/succeed. It may sound simple, but it really works, even when you are consciously aware of what you are doing. Your LOL addiction is a blessing, not a curse - depending on your perspective.

[–]igottennispenis 1 point2 points  (0 children)

2 cents: I used to be obsessed with Civilization 4. I'd be in class studying economics and I'd be looking at how everything I was learning could improve my strategies in the game. I largely credit the 2016 election cycle with transferring that interest, so to speak, onto real life - however fascinating the game may be, reality is infinitely more so. The energy you have for LoL (never played it myself, apart from the prototypes on Warcraft 3) isn't a bad thing at all, you're just spending it on something that doesn't help you grow. Short-term you may have to cold turkey. Long-term the goal is to be more interested in something else that still gives you the same kind of stimulation.

In short, explore. You're playing with a finite system, try getting good at the chaotic and infinitely complex system known as reality, the same way you got good at LoL.

And, honestly, therapy helps.

[–]adamsandler111 1 point2 points  (2 children)

hey did you find a way to shake LoL? I used to play cs go all the time then one day went cold turkey...its been nearly 9 months and i think about it everyday, how easily i would go back to it etc, did you have a solution?

[–]judethedude 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Hi Adam, big fan haha

What I ended up doing was selling my desktop computer completely and getting a really crappy laptop.

[–]i_confused_as_fk 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow. I thought selling the video card was going hard. You went to the limit, kudos.

[–]GoldenCocaine 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Funny, reading this post I was thinking about LoL. Ok, so I used to be COMPLETELY addicted to this game myself. But I fully quit 2 years ago now. Haven't really looked back. Until recently, Ive found myself with more freetime, and I've had a few urges for the first time in a year, but I still don't play. And you know what is holding me back from playing?

I do not own:

  • A desk
  • A chair in my room
  • My desktop computer is in my closet & not set up. I never use it anymore, just my laptop

I suggest physically removing the ability to allow you to make playing LoL easy. League is a HUGE waste of life man, seriously. In my opinion it's just as bad, if not worse than many drugs. Half the time you play, you're not even having fun. Wtf is the point? Remove this toxic trash from your life, and make sure to replace old League time with something else. You won't regret it. I read now instead late at night, keeps me sharp and helps me sleep

[–]truthyego 1 point2 points  (2 children)

If youve tried brfore but failed, take a more drastic step. Throw out the xbox, playstation, delete the game from your PC, and/or cancel your Live subscription. If it's there, it will suck you back in every time. Give it 30 days, find other things to fill your free time, and you won't miss it too much.

[–]Redasshole -2 points-1 points  (1 child)

That's stupid. Playing league of legend fullfil one of his needs. If you take away what fullfills it, it creates a hole and the need will not be fullfilled anymore. He will go crazy. The only thing he can do is to reflect and find out what needs league of legend fullfils and then try another way of fullfilling it. Then he won't need LOL anymore, and that's when he will be able to successfully throw out the pc.

[–]truthyego 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haha. Needs? Video games are a substitution for actual needs and real accomplishment. Fine in moderarion, but it was my experience that tossing the xbox made it much easier to stay on track without getting sucked in to a few hours lost 2 or 3 times a week

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points

[permanently deleted]

[–]Boovs4life 0 points1 point  (2 children)

I have this problem but with Magic the Gathering. Makes sense why people call it "cardboard crack." When you beat people's decks it gives you a rush of dopamine and when you lose you feel disappointed and angry so it makes me want to spend money on more expensive cards to beat those decks. I've spent 20 dollars on ONE card for God's sake. One piece of cardboard.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don't feel bad man, just keep pushing to get better. We've all spent money on DUMB ASS things, myself included. All we can do is acknowledge it and look to higher/better values and stick to those instead.

[–]p00pey 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've lost MILLIONS of dollars on a very bad gambling addiction that lasted for the past 2+ decades. It's all relative. What you've lost is not relevant, unless you have a time machine to go back into time. What's relevant is the present moment. And to a slightly lesser degree what the future holds. Today is the 1st day of the rest of your life, work on living it to the fullest, on your terms, and if that means getting rid of unhealthy addictions, do it. Fuck all the weening off and other bullshit. Just do it...

[–]drew967 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know what you feel like but with cs go instead. Cold turkey is a very good option but I find 9/10 times you play because of your friends. Try changing up the people you hang out with who are more geared to other, more beneficial, activities.

However, I'm just assuming you play because of friends like I do. If you play it because you genuinely want to, just go out and enjoy life, if you don't have one already get a job. Take that money and save/spend it however you wish, remember memories>materials.

Go to the gym and start lifting if you haven't already, if you already do then go heavier and set your goals even further than before.

Basically, if you play league because you genuinely want to and are content with your life as it is, go out and make it better. During that process you'll have little free time so you'll eventually forget about leage. If you're like me though and play because of friends, try changing up who you hang around with usually. That's why you're parents always warned you to stay away from the bad crowd

[–]MaxBrodin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Holy jesuz, it turned into a lol discussion.

To drop addictive games like LoL, drop friends who play that or they will keep sucking you back in. That's why I have no gamer friends

[–]2awalt_cupcake 16 points17 points  (17 children)

You are spot on with a theory I have been kicking around in my personal life. I too am an ego maniac coming from a conservative suburban upbringing. We are bounded by Natural Law. Breaking the law penalizes us. There's something about following the order that grants us success to higher levels.

To add on to your examples, I got in a few fights after learning TRP. From my point of view I was more assertive. I had never been assertive consistently before. A drunk guy at a party got mad at me and swung, breaking my jaw (I stood my ground and he ran home!) I also flipped like a switch socially about my views and how I wanted to really be living my life. End result? Women I knew called me creepy. All immediate male friends resented me. I got in another fight. I needed surgery. I lost my job. Etc...

Point is, I was trying to jump into a new role without letting things unfold naturally. I tried forcing my way through social fabric my own physical fabric and was met with severe penalties.

Things are better now. I've since done many things I never thought I would do. Many hookups (both successful and not successful). Started a small business. Lost tons of weight. Got in fights (haha).

Great post.

[–]Senior Contributordr_warlock 8 points9 points  (1 child)

The Game has rules, but not what the plugged-in believe. Game is bound by Natural Law.

[–]redestofthereds 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What kind of small business?

[–]lJunKunl 2 points2 points [recovered]

End result? Women I knew called me creepy.

I'm facing the exact same thing. What did you do?

I'm trying to fix myself but its led to hyperaggression. I also don't know how to handle "pecking" (for pecking order) when first entering a group.

[–]2awalt_cupcake 0 points1 point  (8 children)

I laughed it off. Some of these girls I wasn't remotely interested in anything more than a bang. (Now that's exactly how I view most women).

Hyperaggression is an appropriate term. That hasn't fully gone away and it's probably best that it doesn't. Its good to always be on you feet so to speak. I have learned to keep it under conttol and still keep eyes open for disrespect and treat it like any normal shit test.

I do want to learn combat. I haven't fully healed in order to go into something physically intense like combat. I think that would be a great place for anyone with aggression to start.

[–]SolaireOfCaestora 4 points5 points  (4 children)

If you decide to go with a martial art, learn that the best way to win a fight is to not have one in the first place. Violence is a last resort option, being a violent person is a sign of mental weakness

[–]2awalt_cupcake 0 points1 point  (3 children)

I completely agree. I'm a big guy (6 ft 3) but a total softee. Ever since middle school I've rough housed but there's always some one who wants to fight me to prove something. They're usually shorter and I know I can really hurt someone if I wanted. As I've gotten older I am met with more hostility. I guess I look like someone people want to hurt.

[–]smfc 2 points3 points  (1 child)

buy a high caliber gun off the street for gods sake. it's not attached to you in any way shape or form and after you use it throw it in a deep lake or something. don't fall for this "fighting is masculine" crap. Violence is the last thing you should have to do to "prove yourself". And if you have to "prove yourself" with violence (which is stupid as fuck) you might as well go all the fucking way. how many times have you heard of a cop or a gangbanger being assaulted with flying fists because the other person wanted to "prove something?" YOU DON'T. You are met with hostility from people because they don't fear you and they look at you as a punching bag.

[–]2awalt_cupcake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is my mindset exactly about arming myself.

[–]asymptotic_salvation 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In that case, I couldn't recommend learning Brazilian Jiu-jitsu more highly.
You can win fights without hurting anyone and, since rolling is such an integral part of any (typical) BJJ gym, you'll have a masculine outlet to channel that aggression into.
Got 35 minutes? Give this AoM video series a quick watch.

[–]lJunKunl 1 points1 points [recovered]

Still keep eyes open for disrespect

How do you attack disrespect non-physically?

Just recently I was talking to two guys who are chill and help me out a lot. I told them I found a roommate online, and one said "What, off of World of Warcraft?" They both laughed and I couldn't think of anything to say so I said "Nah, just Minecraft." They asked if it was true and I said "Hell no, it was off of a roommate website."

[–]Terror_of_the_Void 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You basically have to remain non-reactive. Agree and amplify is a good start but you haven't mastered handling disrespect until they can tell that you truly aren't affected by it.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I experienced the hyperagression phase as well. I was pissed at everyone who was BP and every girl who put herself on a pedestal and had no issue telling them. I even had a blowout with my narcissistic mother - BUT I eventually stopped the hyperagression and went back to the basics.

[–]KM31548 0 points1 point  (1 child)

What steps did you take after you regrouped and realized this? I think I might be experiencing what you are, except I go back and forth sometimes.

[–]2awalt_cupcake 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I learned that a man who has his shit together takes his time

He enjoys his time

[–]Grymeey 20 points20 points [recovered]

'Have enough of a social life to never feel lonely and to stay connected with others'

What? When you can spend long amounts of time in your own company without getting bored or wasting your time on stupid things, (games etc) you know you are in a good place. If you need others not to feel lonely that is a bad sign.

You do not need a concrete social circle to meet new people. If I see someone that I find interesting I will go up to them and talk to them, whether it's on the train, in public or whether it happens to be when I'm with some of my friends.

I've never understood people who struggle to hold frame, the real challenge is developing rock solid life attitudes and evolving them periodically.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (2 children)

You do not need a concrete social circle to meet new people.

I agree. I never said you "have to have a concrete social circle."

[–]Senior Contributordr_warlock 9 points10 points  (0 children)

What I've learned from writing here for over a year is that people will take shit literally and not use their brain to grasp the general concept you're attempting to convey. There's always that person.

[–]p3n1x 6 points7 points  (2 children)

"If you need others not to feel lonely that is a bad sign."

This is scientifically not true. People can't overcome social deprivation by simply grabbing their nuts and "sucking it up like a man".

If this works for you, great. But that is one hell of an opinion to project onto others.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Saying you need others is an opinion that you're projecting onto others as well though.

[–]p3n1x 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not really, my comment is based on science and the fact that we are pack / heard animals. Sure there are a few here and there that want isolation, but you cannot exist day to day in a community and proclaim you need no one.

Where does your water come from?

Where does your electricity come from?

Where does your food come from?

On and on and on and on.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child)

I think being happy while being alone is a load of bs. I understand not being bored with yourself but legit having no friends will fuck you up, we're a social species of animals. There are even studies showing that lonelier people live shorter.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (6 children)

It reads like you are hamstering to justify why not having a social life is a good thing.

[–]Grymeey 3 points3 points [recovered]

Interesting, what makes you say this?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children)

First of all I would like to clarify that I really have no concrete social circle, and while I don't have a problem meeting random strangers and having enjoyable interactions (thanks to meetup.com and the like), I would say that not having a concrete social circle is truly a problem.

People (rightfully) judge you for it the same way you would get judged if you were obese or a heavy smoker or an alcohol addict.

Now, one could convince himself that he is content without any real friends, but in my view that is not too different from fat acceptance activists claiming to be in love and celebration of these obese bodies.

[–]Grymeey 3 points3 points [recovered]

I have never used online means to meet people and I would avoid it really.

I don't really give a shit if I'm 'judged' or not, but I have never even been in the position where my lack of a concrete social circle is made evident or where anyone seems to be confused by it. I just have friends all over the place and a very small number of extremely close friends. Everyone else is a dispensable accessory.

When you think of most people as dispensable accessories to select and manipulate at will, why would you ever give a shit if they happen to 'judge' you? Especially with women, I find my more negative / sinister traits they seem to hamster away because they find me attractive. (the more normal girls, some women are very turned on by it, I have literally had women have their best friends try to argue in front of them that I am no good of them or to stop talking to me and I just smile and watch them push their friend away)

Read the above and your view about it being similar to fat acceptance is made redundant and absurd. Most people provide nothing of value to me, and those who do I have already made into a close friend. What is the point of having a concrete social circle of low quality? Are you suggesting it's statistically probable to ever have one for many people? There are not many quality humans around...

[–]asymptotic_salvation 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sounds like you're either psychopathic or your self-esteem is too high for you to bond to the people around you.
If it's the former then I'd say OP's point doesn't apply to you. If it's the latter then you need to surround yourself with higher value people.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The most interesting conversations I've had were with strangers that I either saw afterwards here and there, or never again.

I enjoy my time alone but welcome conversations if it's something meaningful and enlightening.

[–]1ShallITinder 1 point2 points  (8 children)

I disagree with this post, it is what is wrong with TRP, the endorsement of the idea that being a loner is somehow cool and edgy. You need a social life and having a concrete social circle helps, a lot.

[–]Grymeey 4 points4 points [recovered]

Who said anything about cool and edgy? My life is great yet I spend most of my time to myself. You are essentially trying to make a distinction between the 'sigma' and 'alpha' archetypes, of which I am the former.

[–]p3n1x 1 point2 points  (3 children)

The comment aimed at OP blatantly tells OP that "If you need others not to feel lonely that is a bad sign." This is not true and it is certainly not backed by any science.

It is technically impossible to be "a loner" and successful in this world. Directly or indirectly, everyone depends on others. Absolute independence does not exist.

[–]Grymeey 1 points1 points [recovered]

Let me elaborate; there are healthy and unhealthy forms of dependence. You are correct in saying that absolute independence* does not exist, however in the context and spectrum of social interactions and groups, to depend on others to feel content is quite frankly a sign of weakness. To be alone without feeling lonely is a sign of control and dominance of your own mind, in the sense that you not depend on external factors for a sense of belonging or fulfilment in this case.

It seems as though your comment is pedantic and you are conflating the basic necessities of dependence with my comment. Be as self sufficient as possible.

[–]p3n1x 0 points1 point  (1 child)

To be alone without feeling lonely is a sign of control and dominance of your own mind, in the sense that you not depend on external factors for a sense of belonging or fulfilment in this case.

Lets see how well that plays out over an extended period of time. You may not think you are seeking out external factors until you realize how most material items in your life already subconsciously associated to "the pack".

I guess you could sum up the entire thing by saying "be ok with being alone" when those times happen.

spectrum of social interactions and groups, to depend on others to feel content is quite frankly a sign of weakness.

I'm not being pedantic when I am asking you for something educated to back this opinion up.

You are biologically wired to depend on others for feelings of contentment. Especially social interaction.

Sure, one could fool themselves into believing they have overcome this biological need with a false sense of superiority.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hmmm...the sigma thing is interesting. I'm looking more into it. So far I'm reading a lot of the traits that sound like myself.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I have had no trouble finding a good balance between being by myself and being with friends or family members. I just don't actively seek them out. Most of them are talking about shit I don't care about, or they are flaking out of plans. So I let the meet ups/hang out time happen naturally. If it happens, cool. If it doesn't, I'm not biting my nails and crawling into fetal position.

This is just my experience. I think balance might be the answer here...

[–]Scroph 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I share the opinion of this user. Being introverted doesn't necessarily mean that you're socially inept or that you hate people. It means that you enjoy the company of others, but you can do without it. In other words, you don't go out of your way to seek it but when it happens, you make the best out of it.

One thing I think is worth expanding upon is this :

Most of them are talking about shit I don't care about

I feel the same way (and I bet many others do) not out of disdain or a sense of superiority, but rather because they too find my interests boring. And they probably are, at least from the point of view of someone else.

For example, interests of normal people usually include watching and/or playing sports, keeping up with local and worldwide news, browsing facebook, playing the latest video games, watching TV shows or movies, creating or listening to music, consuming literature, drawing or painting, etc. Mine consist of arcane and esoteric activities like programming, computer engineering, reddit, retro gaming, puzzle and strategy games, penmanship and manga. And while there are like-minded people out there, they're vastly outnumbered by those who aren't. This leads me to my next (and last) point :

One misconception about introverts is that they don't value friendships because they prefer solitude. But it's actually the other way around. Introverted people value their friends because they have few of those and because they are aware of how hard it is to meet someone with whom they can get along. I don't know about yall but personally speaking, I'm thankful for and forever indebted to my few friends especially those who took the initiative to help me when I was too embarrassed or too occupied by finding a solution to reach out to them.

PS : I included examples from my personal life in this post to illustrate some of the points I've made, apologies if it came out as humblebragging or attention seeking.

[–]madeaccforthiss 0 points1 point  (0 children)

People still help when you need someone to bounce ideas off of or get into a certain frame of mind. Similar to rubber duck debugging.

[–]Kafkaevsky 0 points1 point  (1 child)

You don't want to accept the truth. I also thought like you, but deep down you know you need friends.

[–]FrootPicker 9 points10 points  (2 children)

First, great post!

One thing though:

Start to think about questions like “who am I?” and “what do I stand for?”

I actually think this needs to come before anything else, and everything you do should be accompanied by this self-evaluation.

[–]SolaireOfCaestora 1 point2 points  (1 child)

But how can you really evaluate this question if you arent in a good state of mind in the first place

[–]FrootPicker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can't. But you can and should make a reasonable guess and then make it better as you get more experience.

[–]1ShallITinder 9 points10 points  (3 children)

I completely agree with the point of the entire post, it was much needed. The red pill prizes "monk mode" which I think is just flat out stupid if it means throwing away social life and success with women in order to pursue your calling in life. I hate how, as of late, this whole MGTOW to the extent of opting out of society has infiltrated the sub. Not only is this piece of advice egregious, it also gives a voice to the same neckbeard that have little business giving advice in the first place. The red pill has a section that prizes being a lonely shut in because it is so "alpha" compared to being a part of blue pilled society. Social life and sex/dating should be pursued by younger guys on here because not only is it satisfying, it will keep your mind right instead of making you a lonely awkward shut in.

One other point I think that needs to be mentioned on this thread, location.

Depending on your situation, moving to a city where you are a great fit is one of the best investments you can make in your life. I believe that 20 something guys are truly throwing away a lot of potential and precious time by living in small towns, suburbs, or at home with their parents. You need to get out there as a 20 something and experience the big city life, it will change you. Move to the area of the country you always wanted to move to when you were little and put yourself out there. I have found a huge difference in the city I lived in and how happy I was there, which led to me being even more productive.

[–]p3n1x 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You need to get out there as a 20 something and experience the big city life, it will change you.

I think those that experience this while growing up, will naturally take off from the nest. Playing a travel sport, my dad, my mom or all three of us at the same time were somewhere outside of our hometown at least 2 twice a month. I left home well before hitting 20.


It should be a "flag" to yourself if you are not feeling the itch to detach from mom and dads tit and GTFO there on your own.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

moving to a city where you are a great fit is one of the best investments you can make in your life. I believe that 20 something guys are truly throwing away a lot of potential and precious time by living in small towns, suburbs, or at home with their parents.


Seriously if you're living in some white trash suburb or uneducated community in your early 20's you're throwing your time away. I moved to NYC about a year ago and difference is night and day compared to where I'm from. There's also high quality women everywhere. I mean it's like anywhere else where you need to play the field for a while if you want to meet someone you're compatible with, but it's just better pickings in general.

I also think that spending some time on the road on a long motorcycle trip, hitchhiking, living out of your car etc.. Is a great experience. Or spending long amounts of time in nature in the woods in isolation.

[–]1ShallITinder 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How old were you when you moved to NYC? I am thinking about heading there in my 30s.

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Apart from the obvious ones I have a few favorites on TRP. LegendaryPeace, IlliadsTangent, Constructiveasshole, Neoreactivesafe, and 0xdada. Keep up the good work.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks man. I appreciate it.

[–]2ChainZinMedSchool 7 points8 points  (1 child)

As scarface once said "First you get the money, then you get the power, then you get the bitches"

[–]redestofthereds 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You could be totally correct about the New World Order, but if you’re a fat neckbeard, that really shouldn’t be your biggest concern in life. If you want to participate in the culture war at that level (or do anything at a high level, really) you better be able to back it up by being a high functioning person across the board. If you are, then nobody can really touch you.

I need to get my shit together before I mention to more people that I support Donald. Like GayLube says about MRA,they discredit us with their appearance alone.

[–]Senior Contributordr_warlock 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Excellent post. This is simple, yet practical. We often times get caught up in the theory for the "why". Post like these, the "do", are powerful and I don't think many people understand that.

This is philosophy. Like Marcus Aurelius said in Meditations...

"Doctors keep their scalpels and other instruments handy, for emergencies. Keep your philosophy ready too -- ready to understand heaven and earth. In everything you do, even the smallest thing, remember the chain that links them. Nothing earthly succeeds by ignoring heaven, nothing heavenly by ignoring the earth."

This philosophy as Marcus always stresses, falls within the rules of Natural Law, not attempting break it. That would be like smacking into a wall and wondering why you aren't getting anywhere.

Good post.

[–]BowlOfCandy 2 points3 points  (1 child)

For those who are more MGTOW leaning and are interested in theory, check out this video by Colttaine (15min, seriously worth it): MGTOW: A Unified Theory of the Human Condition

He uses Maslow's Pyramid to explain how masculine vs feminine imperatives navigate through the hierarchy of needs. Really insightful.

[–]p3n1x 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is definitely worth 15 minutes. Whether you agree with all the material or not, it is educated and well represented and brief.

TY for sharing.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Awesome post. It really helps you understand how important it is to take things step by step and not get ahead of yourself. Jumping straight into higher level activity is an easy way to get frustrated and even depressed (ie taking a health dose of rejection).

I really like the hierarchy of needs as you have laid out in terms of TRP. To me working your way through the hierarchy is an exercise in building your energy levels. For example, I put a lot of energy into the basics like cleaning my apt, cooking my own healthy food, lifting regularly etc. Having these items on lock really helps push you forward into higher levels of activity because once you have the stamina built up to take care of these with ease you are ready to expend that energy on new more stimulating activity. Plus you already feel good because you have that rewarding feeling of making those small accomplishments (ie finishing cleaning your kitchen, or finishing a good workout, or having a solid workday) which grants momentum. One of my roommates can hardly take care of the basic level of needs and really just makes me pity him, yet he expects to be getting higher level stimulation but is instead an emotional wreck it seems. Sad. I just avoid.

When moving into the social sphere, Im left with much more confidence knowing that my body, living space, car, work etc are all taken care of and of good quality and they are probably of value to other people who recognize a quality person. I can really just focus my energy on having a good time and not worry about anything else which is attractive to people. And another good part is that if your plans do go to shit or you get rejected, its much easier to get over it as you already have lots of things lined up to do anyways. In the survival level of needs there's always work to be done so you should never really feel hung up to dry.

To me, all of this constant work is just building stamina and energy to do bigger and better things, create bigger dreams and goals which you can realistically achieve. I like your section on staying grounded because I too like to play with the idea of certain controversial social ideas, and when you have a solid understanding of your place in the social hierarchy it makes you much more credible.

Im starting to rant but my point was that, the more work you put in on satisfying your needs the more energy you end up with making it easier to move onto the best parts of living and experiencing the things you never thought possible. I was fucking a new plate the other night and she literally said "why are you so good at everything you do?" I just responded "I put in the work"

[–]Redasshole 1 point2 points  (0 children)

After I found out TRP, I got over my major depression, suicidal thoughts, secured my marks in college and got over my health problems.

Then I began thinking about how I was living my life. After lots of thinking, I concluded the following about how to organize my life. My life was such a mess that I had to change everything.

  • sleep : 9 hours per night (I actually need that much sleep. I can't function normally otherwise), go to bed at the same time each night

  • exercise : I need to exercise every day. At least 30 min

  • nutrition : no more junk food, cakes or ice cream, and at least 5 fruits a day

That's the basics really. But I never respected them. My project is to add meditation every day too. And reading. And cleaning my room.

But those things are the ones I need. It may be different for you. For instance, I need danger in my life. Without that, I get miserable. All my life, I didn't take care of myself, of business or any of the basics because it's not fun. So I got to playing video games and doing drugs because it gave me a sense of the adventure I need. I have discovered that if I schedule regular dangerous activities each month I can focus on the boring repetitive stuff during the rest of the time.

[–]Senior Contributoradam-l 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Another solid post. Where's your badge?

[–]slay_it_forward 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Why does TRP always to PUA as tricks and routines? It's not 2005. No one has been teaching routines or tricks (nlp?) for a decade.

Game has merit. It's using female psychology to your advantage. Deny it to your own detriment.

[–]TheMinistryOfAwesome 1 point2 points  (1 child)

You think having clothes that fit well is a lower level than having a social life and keeping fit? Or enough money to avoid stress more survival orientated than keeping fit?

Ridiculous - Maslow would be turning in his grave...

[–]Algernoq 1 point2 points  (3 children)

What the fuck does "nutritious" and "balanced" mean?

High protein? Low calorie? Low fat?

Say what diet you mean, not marketing bullshit.

[–]itsdavianbro 1 point2 points  (2 children)

I think that it's pretty straight forward - get enough of each of your food groups, cook your food from basic ingredients, know where it comes from, eat good shit. It's not rocket science, you can choose paleo, keto, iifym... there's lots of diets that fit his suggestion.

Adjectives aren't 'marketing bullshit'. Don't expect OP to hold your hand through something you can google.

[–]Algernoq 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I am literally eating only Swiss Cheese and (occasionally) chicken, plus coffee and other zero-calorie stimulant drinks, for a keto cut.

"nutritious" and "balanced" are 100% meaningless marketing bullshit words that are used to sell energy bars that are nutritionally equivalent to pop tarts.

[–]NeoreactionSafe 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The this-worldly concern of Confucianism rests on the belief that human beings are fundamentally good, and teachable, improvable, and perfectible through personal and communal endeavor especially self-cultivation and self-creation. Confucian thought focuses on the cultivation of virtue and maintenance of ethics.


Another very down to earth post with basic things you need to do well before you can get into other things.


[–][deleted] 1 points1 points

[permanently deleted]

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Yeah, I linked Maslow. His is a very good paradigm to work off of.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your post enlightened me.I was that guy with 10% body fat and people always used to refer me as "Good looking" but I became a workaholic and started completing my tasks.

I would reward myself with someone whenever I complete a task.I used to have a time based routine but now I have a task based routine because the latter seems to be more effective.

Lately, I started feeling bad about myself because I was ignoring working out and socializing for completing my tasks.

I guess, I should find time for working out and socializing.Thanks man.

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points [recovered]

What if you're going monk mode? What if you're not going out to focus on a new business you're starting. By ignoring girls and trying to get your financial life in order, you're sort of skipping the early parts of the hierarchy to get to the higher levels? Is this bad? I hate the idea of approaching girls when I haven't got my shit in order.

[–]1ShallITinder 2 points3 points  (0 children)

What if you're going monk mode?

Very bad idea, the idea of monk mode is stupid to guys who don't have other needs fulfilled.

[–]1Jax77789 -1 points0 points  (2 children)

Yes it is bad in my book. I am broke as fuck and rebooting but I have a plate and will probably add 2 in the weeks to come. Being immediately successful with chicks builds up my confidence level. It brings social power as well. And chicks are fun to play around with provided you view them as play things only.

So by all means, go get some girls. It does not matter you do not have your shit in order. I never tell bitches what I do for a living. My plate pays for everything. I am an Alpha Fucks to her ( she is cheating on her BB with me). Say nothing or just lie. Your situation in life does not matter to them if they are attracted to you.

Also surely your mission is your priority but by not taking some good off time you will get less productive.

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points [recovered]

Your situation in life does not matter to them if they are attracted to you.

Not really. How successful you are has a lot of bearing over how valuable you are as a man. How much value you add to the world can have a huge impact over her attraction to you.

I know this isn't a necessity though. Bar tenders get laid constantly. Thugs, drug dealers etc. also get plenty of poon, but having you shit in order is hugely attractive to women. Knowing how to play the game of life and winning is insane. Women want to fuck/date winners.

It's easy to get away with being a loser in life if you're just after young girls since they prioritise value way over comfort, but the girl you'v plated would definitely want to keep tabs on your situation in life and how successful you are.

[–]1Jax77789 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sure being successful is the goal and glows off on women, not arguing about the importance of being a winner. It is just that being able to bang women feeds a positive mental loop that helps me win at life and improve myself. I however have my doubts about money being a prime factor of success with women.

If anything, TRP has taught me to conceal all my assets. Displaying your worth is tantamount to turning into a walking wallet in women's eyes. They value money only as long as they can take it. Otherwise they do not care about it that much. Now they work and there is the welfare state to back them up.

Look that poor Musk, good looking, worth billions, the epitome of a winner, yet gets plundered by a dumb bimbo. They value money for what it is. Money. It will not get you a loyal woman and will definitely not keep her attracted to you. Or maybe a girl will enjoy the comfort and social brio your money brings her for a while. You will think she is all yours because you are winner, then she will fuck Chad on the side and will, if possible, try to get you to raise Chad's spermlings. See Chad wins here from a biological standpoint. He gets his genes passed down and all the fun. I also think this applies to all women, young and wallish.

What gets them going today is Alpha mindset and Alpha body. All the rest is secondary. Rollo Tomassi's last post and CH have a lot about that. This is a fascinating topic. Natural selection is actually going backwards towards a type R ( aka reductio ad musclum). Just my 0.02$.

[–]J_AsapGem 0 points1 point  (1 child)

this is absolutely beautiful bro thank you for writing this

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not a problem. Thanks for reading.

[–]Luckyspams 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Time to start hitting the gym and stop being a little bitch.

[–]p3n1x 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Higher Level : Acceptance of Facts!

[–]character_ethics 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I wish someone had told me this when I was a teenager. During those years, I was overconfident in my abilities and believed I could get anything if I just put my mind to it, ignoring my basic needs.

Result of such false philosophy lead me to become overweight and depressed. Somehow recovered from it. Got myself into coding and again I put all the focus into it, gained some more pounds on the way to the extent I started to look like Rosie O Donnell. Every girl was running away from me. This got me into depression again. From the abyss of my depressive state I got the humility to accept the Maslow's heirarchy of needs and started to loose weight and lift. Now I have not reached anywhere near my peak or where I want to be but I know with consistent and balanced efforts I can do it.

You cannot break the natural law, you can only break yourself to the natural law.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Glad you're starting to find balance. It's so easy to fixate on the highest-level needs, but realistically you'll never fulfill them if you can't even take care of your own health and talk to girls. It sounds almost comically obvious, but we all need reminders (constantly).

[–]0_fox_are_given 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great post legendary Brothulu.

Don't up vote this

[–]orangepolenta 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nice one.

One might add 'simplify' to this list. Decisions can be our enemy.

what do I stand for? is an import question to start answering. Its a tough road to discover these answers and often some answers change with life experience. But having some core values helps. Does anyone have any quantitative material that aids in this discovery?

[–]shopir9 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Awesome post, it really motivated me to start doing the change in my life, I am learning about the red pill and this kind of post help me a lot.

[–]img_guy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First post i've read on this sub and its one of the most useful pieces of info I've ever read. Thank you.

[–]Talkytalktalk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Kind of like, it's not the thousand mile journey ahead that defeats you, it's the grain of sand in your shoe

[–]azrise -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Great post! What you've written is actually one of the most basic and fundamental things that all psychology students learn. It's called Maslow's Pyramid (or Maslow's hierarchy of needs)

The idea is that one must first fill his most basic needs (Physiological - eat, drink, etc.) before being able to fill other less fundamental needs (esteem, love, etc.)

[–]LegendaryPeaceLies -1 points0 points  (1 child)

While this essay is insightful in many ways, remember that the truth always lies in the nuance of things. Therefore, it is particularly germane in that the author of such is either male or female.

[–]LegendaryPeaceLies 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Comment before downvoting...reddiquette. My comment was both (a) insightful and (b) painfully true, so a little written critique could save the downvoters some dignity.