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Red Pill TheoryHow To Become Extroverted (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by DadOnDabs

Introduction I firmly believe with enough time and effort you can change from an introvert to an extrovert. However, if you don't do the things in this post daily then you will start to turn back into an introvert. This is a collection of small and easy things you can do to help not only become more extroverted but also help with game.

Body Trick 1: Compliment people. Compliment them on anything that isn't their looks (men and women). This will also help your game as well. It will help you start to think on your feet if you try to turn this into a conversation. "Hey I like your shoes" "where did you get them?" "If you don't mind me asking how much were they?" Once you start getting good at leading conversations like this you will be able to apply this to game.

Trick 2: Smile all the time. I found this gets me a lot more IOI's and makes approaching easier. Most guys walk around with angry dick head face. If you are the one guy smiling all the time people will notice and want to join you in your happiness. I'm not saying all out dumb grin but raise those lip corners enough were it is noticeable.

Trick 3: (extends on trick 2) Smile at people. If you make eye contact with someone and they don't immediately look away (damn introverts) smile at them. Again not a full faced grin but more than corner of lips raised smile from trick 2.

Trick 4: Do some dumb shit. Walk outside in the morning and scream the first thing that comes to your mind. Lay in the middle of a semi-busy sidewalk. Walk around the stairs through the grass instead of up them. Jump in the air and click your heels. It doesn't matter what you do. This is a key point in breaking your approach anxiety and learning game. Realizing you are a tiny blip in the space time continuum and what you do today will most likely be forgotten tomorrow (apart from rape and murder) is a big step in being more confident.

Trick 5: Say whatever you want (unfiltered). When you walk up to order food say the first comment that comes to your mind. Whether it be about their appearance, the restaurant, or a cool name for your future cat you just thought of. It does not matter. Breaking the filter will open up a world of possibilities when gaming and starting conversations in general.

Trick 6: Amuse yourself. I make myself laugh more than any of my friends. I just walk around and if I think of something funny or notice something funny I will openly laugh about it. It makes you happier throughout the day and helps if you have a pessimistic mindset. This also applies when talking to people in general or gaming. The limits of casual conversation go further than you could imagine. It matters how you say it. If you are saying it in a fact and data type of way (beta) then you will be taken seriously and people will be put off by you. If you sound like you are just amusing yourself and having fun with the conversation people will tend to follow along in your humor.

Trick 7: High five random people. See someone jogging past you. "Keep at it!" high five. Someone says they share the same favorite color as you "I love purple too! High five". Anything anyone says or does that you approve of or amuses you "High five!". There is no sexual expectation or anything like that with a high five therefore 99.99% of people will not look at you weird for doing this. I have done this on dates when I cannot initiate kino naturally, I have done this with people who seem uninterested (instantly interested and happy), and just random people. I have never had it backfire. And if they do ignore your high five? Just high five yourself and laugh it off.

Trick 8: Laugh it off. People are shitty and will do shitty things. You give a compliment and the person looks at you like an idiot. Laugh it off loud enough for them to hear you. Even if it is right in front of their face. It shows you don't care and just want to have a good time. Don't let others bring your mood down.

Trick 9: TALK TO EVERYONE EVERYWHERE. As soon as you get out of bed in the morning talk to the first person you see. Not the second not the third. The first person. Talk to yourself in the mirror if you wont be out for a while. The process needs to start as soon as you wake up so you can ride the wave all day. Standing in line for food? Talk to someone. On the bus? Talk to someone. See someone eating alone? "Is this seat taken?" Talk to them. Male or female it doesn't matter. I've found by doing this and riding the confidence wave of talking to everyone it is way easier to strike up random conversations with anyone, especially women. It changes your entire tone without you having to do anything. It also puts less pressure on the conversation. If you have already talked to 100 people that day then what is one more conversation? It makes each conversation a little less significant and easier to deal with. Really helps with approach anxiety.

Trick 10: I actually got this one on a fortune cookie today. "Those who live without expectations will never experience disappointment." I feel this applies to more than just being an extrovert but TRP in general. The world owes you nothing and you will only get out of it what you put in. Do you wish when you saw familiar faces that aren't friends they would say hi? Be the person who says hi. Do you wish your friends would boost you up randomly without asking? Be that friend that does that. Wish people would randomly enter your day and make you laugh? Be that guy. Don't expect people to do something for you that you won't do for them. Don't expect her to be monogamous if you aren't. Don't expect honesty if you aren't. Don't expect sex on a date. Make it happen. In the wise words of 2 Chainz "I want it so I'mma get it!"

Bonus Tip: Open body. When sitting down spread your legs sit with good posture and keep your arms out. When walking or standing around keep your chest popped out, head up, and shoulders back. DO NOT look at the ground when walking around (unless its steps or something in your way).

Closing These are a few tricks that have helped me come out of my shell and have changed my life drastically. Employ these techniques EVERY DAY and see what happens.


[–]greatslyfer 95 points96 points  (3 children)

Tbh people are just getting annoyed cause you confuse being an introvert with being socially shy/awkward.

You can be a confident introvert is where I'm getting at.

[–]30fretibanezguy 40 points41 points  (1 child)

Likewise. I can be confident and social all day but it drains my mental energy and it tires me out. That's what being an introvert is at its heart.

[–]theredpillager 208 points209 points  (46 children)

Learning social skills =/= becoming extroverted. Lots of good tips to acclimate to approaching in this post, but can we stop with the introvert=bad rubbish? Just had to defend introversion yesterday.

[–]Dildobagginsaa 61 points62 points  (17 children)

Im a brooding introvert thats slept with 23 women in 3 years of dating. Lots of women love dark and mysterious. You just need to learn to capitalize, move, plan, and escalate.

[–]Systral 37 points38 points  (1 child)

Introversion =/= dark, mysterious either

[–]KV-n 20 points21 points  (14 children)

Can you elaborate how did you do that? It sounds like you didnt have to fake being extrovert, which is standard solution for introverts

[–]Dildobagginsaa 25 points26 points  (10 children)

I've probably actually picked only one woman up. Women will usually pursue an introvert with high smv, like good looks, height, stature, and poise. Nobody wants a grumpy troll, but women get wet thinking about a hot damaged guy that they can fix. You let them take the bait, then escalate from there. So most of my lays have been through friend circles and making sure I always appear attractive.

[–]Invocati 46 points47 points  (3 children)

So in short: be hot and it doesn't matter.

[–]2dogsandpizza 10 points11 points  (0 children)

That's why everyone bangs on about lifting.

[–]J_AsapGem 1 point2 points  (1 child)

im introvert as well, people say im mysterious and they cant tell whether im happy or sad, but i realize there is a fine line in between an introvert and extrovert, being real is on e of those by being real you won't really drain your energy

[–]Omnibrad 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Keep in mind introvert/extrovert fall along a spectrum between two extremes. People say "I'm an introvert" which can be translated into "I lean towards the introvert side of the spectrum" but you always have a little bit of extrovert in you.

[–]KV-n 0 points1 point  (3 children)

shit :/ last question - how would you rate the girls who approached you and how would you estimate the difference between your smv?

[–]Bury_She points points [recovered]

If you're trying to calculate the difference of number and quality of lays against someone's intro/extraversion, you're overthinking it

[–]KV-n 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I dont think so, in my life i have always seen girls prefering popular extroverts over introverts. If someone says extro/introversion doesnt have an effect i consider him on par with say flatearthers - its denying reality.

So yea, if the guy gets laid by letting girls approach him i woul expect him to fuck only girls of significantly lower smv

[–]theredpillager 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sure, extro/introversion has an effect, but it isn't the effect you've concluded. Nothing flat Earth about it. I've slept with 50 women (that's full penetrative sex; number climbs to 70+ if we include girls I didn't full-on fuck), more than most of my peers by a long shot, and I'm one of the more introverted in my social circles. There has been a decent mix of approaching and them pursuing me in there.

You've read the sidebar enough to know that, statistically, even chads mostly fuck girls of lower SMV right? Women fuck, date and marry up, remember? SMV of my partners varies wildly. I mostly fuck hot girls but I've got my war stories, like anybody else. Sometimes you just need to get your dick wet. I once took a Butterface redhead home because it was clear she wanted to fuck me and I wanted to knock "bang a redhead" off my sexual bucket list. The next morning I roll over and I'm like "god she's ugly," but I banged her again anyway cuz the body was tight and I didn't want her to hate life too much after I dropped her at her car, never to be spoken to again.

[–]Tough_Luv 3 points4 points  (0 children)

46 in 2 years for me, also introvert.

Be masculine. Have a mission. Use every dating app.

No need to be the socialite of the party if you are always in 1 on 1 situations with these women.

[–]KumonRoguing 8 points9 points  (0 children)

It's almost better sometimes. Instead of faking having more important stuff to do than the woman, you would really rather read a book or be at the gym. This increases their desire to know what you're doing especially if you don't talk about it.

[–]OpiumPhrogg 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Thanks for saying this. People don't realize you can be outgoing and still be introverted.

I hate to be the one to throw this word around but there is a "spectrum" for intro/extroversion, I fall more into the introvert category (probably due to dealing with extreme hearing loss in my left ear since 3 years old) but some of my personality/quirks are more extrovert. If I have to do something extroverted that I am really more introverted about, it expends more of my mental energy.

These are good skills to practice but as the saying goes a leopard can't change it's spots.

[–]SMGPthrowaway 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Only reason you hate that word is because it's associated with autism. There's no reason to hate it for that. It just means that there are different severity levels. You can be a diabetic with normal blood sugars in the 300s or in the 150s. It's not exactly a spectrum disease but it is similar. Saying spectrum just means exactly what you're saying it means, and if someone else associates that with autism that's their ignorance, not yours.

[–]OpiumPhrogg 2 points3 points  (0 children)

True. Thanks for pointing that out.

[–]logicalthinker1 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Of course not. But introverts don't PREFER social settings. Extroverts do.

I prefer steak but that doesn't mean I can't eat other food or can't even enjoy them.

[–]jackandjill22 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. Introversions an important aspect of our characteristics & plays an important role in our society. Appreciate that man.

[–]Nodeal_reddit 40 points41 points  (0 children)

100% disagree. You can be comfortable and competent in social situations, but that doesn't make you an extrovert. Extroverts NEED the interaction. Introverts NEED solitude. Both types can cross over, but they'll always gravitate toward their natural state.

[–]Bradleybeal88 points points [recovered]

How to prance around like a clown to become a social autist

[–]DanDanSmash points points [recovered]

I came here to say that this is a guide on how to be a douche

[–]GenghisKhanSpermShot 3 points4 points  (0 children)

TIL being happy is being a douche.

[–]helgisson 12 points13 points  (1 child)

Introvert means you get mental energy from being alone. Extrovert means you get mental energy from being around other people.

It says nothing about social skills in general.

[–]Dred -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

You can get mental energy from any situation. This post is teaching you tops on how to get it from interacting with other people.

[–]NeoreactionSafe 7 points8 points  (2 children)

 

  • Energy flows inward.

  • Energy flows outward.

 

There really only becomes a problem when you become "imbalanced" in your energy flows.

If you are always introverted (inward flow) that's not good.

If you are always extroverted (outward flow) that's not good.

So seek to have freedom of thought... the ability to flow naturally.

Avoid extremism.

 

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I wouldn't say avoid extremism, but be flexible in both directions.

[–]NeoreactionSafe -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Good point.

 

  • Be extreme, but in both directions.

 

...and adapt to circumstances so that your flow matches conditions.

 

[–]TALzFGxawb 5 points6 points  (0 children)

introversion != shy. but whatever

tip for introverts: learn to escalate quickly. you're better 1 on 1, so get 1 on 1. group talk will drain you, but pulling one aside will energize you, even if the group is still right there

[–]Lo-G 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You should stop thinking of yourself as "an introvert" or "an extrovert". The Jungian archetypes which were a historical way of looking at the deeper underlying motives of people have been totally misunderstood and reframed as "you're X, this is your natural mode of being, if you want to be happy, act like an X would".

The fact of the matter is that all research that has been done on the subject indicates that it is IMPOSSIBLE to predict how a person will act in any specific context based on any of the popular Jungian archetypical tests (for example I score as an ENTP or ENTJ, those would be Extroverts).

Stop thinking of yourself inside a framework that was given to you by a bunch of snake oil salesmen. Act rationally within the frame of reference that you are limited to and you will do fine. Want to fuck that little slut sitting in front of you on the bus? Say hi to her. But no need to go talking to random people just because "you need to act X way ALWAYS to get laid".

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (6 children)

These are some great tips for boosting confidence, is being an introvert bad or something? Why would anyone want to switch?

[–]use-the-thumos 2 points3 points  (0 children)

People wrongly equate introversion with social anxiety/awkwardness.

[–]JinSantosAndria 4 points5 points  (1 child)

I do everything but 7 and everyone around me still knows I'm an introvert. Which is a good thing. Because nothing I do around them has any importance to me or the person I'm talking to. Once it's business... the true colors will always shine. You can try to fake it, but you will always be what you are and look stale against a natural. Introverts and extroverts need the one another. It's like marketing and development. You get shit done.

[–]CQC3 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Once it's business... the true colors will always shine. You can try to fake it, but you will always be what you are and look stale against a natural

Underrated comment.

There's so much fake it till you make it shit out there, and I won't fault that, it DOES work to an extent and depending on the person. We like to shit on the Just Be Yourself advice and deny that people have a set in stone personality. I agree plenty things can be changed for the better about yourself with work, but people take everything too literally, there are some things you cannot change.

I can fake being an extrovert, but it makes me INCREDIBLY tired, it has a serious psychic toll on me because I'm in many cases I'm the opposite. At one point faking extroversion became a convenient routine to run away from my self. The real goal is to find the most efficient manner of being for you that is also as effortless and natural. JBY isn't practical because often we need to use our minds to supersede our instincts in order to make smarter choices, so finding a balance between those two is ideal. This is why "naturals" in something almost always have it easier because they are molded quite well to effortlessly deal with what other people might find to be tiring or taxing.

[–]The_Valuer 2 points3 points  (0 children)

extrovert ≠ getting girls and introvert ≠ not getting girls.

being extrovert can give you points and also being introvert gives you other points. it is all about what game do you play. club game can exhaust introverts so strategically it won't be easy there. there are a lot of pickup gurus that are introverts. as long as you confident enough + OI + BASIC social skills a lot of women may find you attractive enough.

[–]anewfuckerdome 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Most of the tips are great apart from 1-2 things:

TALK TO EVERYONE EVERYWHERE

Wrong. Talk to everyone you are interested in for something - sex, money, advice etc. Chatting up random nerds or old people wont do anything good for you. As you go higher in the ladder, lot of the random people who are useless for you would like to suddenly start talking to you for some reason - this is where you have to be selective and harsh, or else your value will go down.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (1 child)

[–]rios_salvi 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The identity video was great. Thank you for sharing

[–]hunteeer 10 points11 points  (6 children)

This is a perfect guide how to creep out 99% of people. Most of the things you listed will make you look weird and like idiot or a psycho.

Talking to random strangers? Most people will leave immediately. Maybe older folks won't.

Complimenting people on stuff? Had this task for some weeks during CBT. You'll earn weird looks a lot.

Smiling at or high fiving strangers? More so than compliments. Most people seem to be intimidated by stuff like that, especially when you have powerful posture.

Smile all rhe time? May work for some people. Most strangers are so deeply sad on 5 days a week, they'll hate seeing somebody happy.

[–]moehrse 2 points3 points  (1 child)

The last time a guy complimented me on my looks was this one mormon trying to invite me to their gathering. I sent him verbally to the place where sun doesn't shine...

[–]hunteeer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I never got any compliments on my body or looks (everything looks shitty on a shitty body) except for my broad frame (genetic gift and nothing earned). So see yourself as lucky bastard.

[–]Htowngetdown 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I didn't get past the part where he asked people how much their stuff costs. You shouldn't do that in my opinion

[–]hunteeer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It'd a least give them a chance to brag about how expensive their shit was

[–]WhiteTrashKiller 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Maybe he is the Anti RP. Spreading information around in the hopes he can keep the RP population down and create less competition for his people....

Or he is just weird. If you lay down on the sidewalk here, they will most assuredly pick you up. Either to get looked at or to keep you from loitering. Especially if you aren't indigent(cleanand groomed), then they know your egg is cracked.......

[–]matrixpush 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You're gonna come across odd. Basically chant in public. lol

[–]TheYoungOwl_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ambivert who applies a lot of these concepts everyday. Worthwhile read for the newcomers here.

[–]Kiltraki 2 points3 points  (0 children)

To repeat what others have said, these are no doubt good tips. But introversion is not the problem. Social awkwardness/anxiety is an issue.

Introversion is more about not being fucked talking, rather than being scared to talk. Anxiety/social awkwardness is about wanting to talk and express themselves but not being able to appropriately.

Confident introverts are a thing.

[–]supremelummox 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Don't expect her to be monogamous.

[–]TheWaxPuppy 2 points3 points  (2 children)

I don't want to give you a high-five. Fuck off. Also, who cares about shoes? It's bad either if you are complimenting a dude or chick on their shoes, for different reasons.

[–]DadOnDabs[S] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Someone doesn't like compliments from strangers.

[–]TheWaxPuppy 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Obviously, I'm a man - I don't need them.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This should be titled "How to become autistic"...

[–]J-Mosc 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I hate take a stance directly against you with nothing but my own theoretical opinion - but here I go. As a definite introvert, what you proposed doing sounds so extremely taxing and energy draining that I could barely get myself to finish reading your post.

Not to say I'm a generally lazy person (maybe I am, is that something I can change? I try to eat healthy and work out, but do suffer from chronic pains there's that). Some of these things you mentioned I already force myself to do just to get through life easier, to get along with my coworkers better, to talk to girls, etc. But in the end there has never been a doubt that I'm introverted and all of these exercises are unnatural and tiring. When I'm doing them I'm even thinking about how difficult it is to do. And this is years and years talking.

I'm pretty sure this just is who I am deeply. Which means I can't complain when more outgoing people get further in life, but I accept that. I've tried so many times in my life to be someone I'm not to be liked better, and I still don't think it comes off as real. People can smell it. I still don't enjoy going out, being in crowds, engaging in long conversations, etc. Because IT IS forced.

Apologies for the negative take. But if you can dedicate your life to becoming extroverted, then you're a better man than I.

[–]KingRamiro 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well crafted post bro. Puts a lot into perspective

[–]Katavasis 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah,everyone has said it already but:

1)Introverts/extroverts is just a theory.At best,there is a correlation. 2)In/Ex describe how you are using your energy,when surrounded by other people. 3)You can be an introverted outgoing guy or an extroverted shy one.

Basically,you just gave ways to break your bumble,regardless your inclination.For that,you did very good.Funny things how people have the same thought patterns

[–]GMack17 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I get what the op is trying to say. But being is introverted is not a disease. There's a difference between introversion and being anti-social. The key is finding a common interest. Once that interest is noticed, it is much easier for introverts to socialize.

[–]trp_ocd 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Laying on a sidewalk does not make you extroverted. It makes you an asshat with an arrest record.

[–]juliusstreicher 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yep. Cant think of something more juvenile attention seeking than that.

[–]whuttupfoo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The 100% most certain way to become more outgoing is to meditate 30+ minutes a day minimum.

[–]Blaat1985 5 points6 points  (3 children)

No you can't. Being introverted or extroverted is hardwired into your brain.

[–]Dred 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Nothing is true and everything is possible.

[–]Blaat1985 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Proof that everything is possible by jumping of a building and flying.

[–]redolas 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Wtf are you all arguing about some mistake in the title? Here OP gives us loads of ideas on how to be social, and instead of thanking him, it's all wahwah introverts , blahblah extroverts.

Good job OP. Thanks for your effort.

[–]DadOnDabs[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've been laughing at this all day. That's all anyone cares about. It's whatever though. Take it or leave it.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Skimmed through this. Guys don't wake up in the morning and yell outside. Or better yet do, so everyone knows who is dumb enough to fall for this bait.

[–]thederpill 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Excellent tips. Beware of taking up too much space you might piss off feminists. ;)

[–]Dreamer994 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am introvert myself, it seems impossible to me to be that guy who love parties and dancing around for 5 hours. After one hour of party or talking with people I am so tired and dead, that I need to take a break for few hours and be by myself.

[–]ChadIsDead 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Extroversion is one of the Big Five personality traits that is subject to a lot of research in psychology. In adulthood, these traits are stable over time. You don't "become" extroverted. You are already somewhere on the introvert/extrovert continuum and that place is not going to change very much at all on an individual level.

These tricks will at best help bring out the extroverted side of an unknowingly natural extrovert.

[–]OilyB 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm a 'pseudo extravert' and I think one is extraverted/introverted (somewhere on the scale) and that stays the same. One can however learn to act extraverted all the time (above tips from OP) but it will wear you down after a while..

I'd say, learn to act cute from time to time but remain introverted if that's what you are - it will draw someone towards you that appreciates introversion and you'll be able to be who you are.

There's nothing wrong with being introverted or shy or the quiet type.

[–]FightMeImIrish 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do all those things, doesn't change the fact that I would rather be home chilling with maybe a buddy or two rather than out clubbing. Honestly, I would take being home alone for near anything else.

[–]1randomperson123321 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Actually, it's introverts who emit the most self assured and steady aura.

[–]PurpleFilth 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Pfft I'm an introvert and have no problem being in social situations. Most people see me as intelligent and capable. I study engineering and am smart enough to know how to act in social situations. I've consistently done well in job interviews, have a good vocabulary, speak well with people. I dunno I just think you're confusing different things. Just because I find a lot of social situations to be kind of fake and tiring doesn't mean I don't do well in them.

[–]Aazaad 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Awesome tips. and all true. I think if I could hi-five random people on the street..I'd believe I can do anything lol

[–]goodbadnotassugly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the post, I enjoyed reading it

[–]8n0n 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Private Man has an alternative better method; stumbled across this while going through his old blog posts.

Have A Social Comfort Zone - archive link

I like this idea better as it takes away some of the anxiety of social situations for those on the introverted spectrum.

Read this post at own risk and presume this has been modified by Reddit Inc

[–]40_SixandTwo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think people confuse being an introvert with not having social skills. I consider myself an introvert but I've done a lot of these things OP has put up here to help me come out of my shell.

From what I've observed, there's extroverts and introverts with fantastic social skills, just like there's extroverts who have zero social skills.

[–]RPDrogan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am neither an introvert nor an extrovert. I find I am a mixture of the 2 but can lean more towards 1 side when it is beneficial to me.

Something a lot of people in this thread need to understand is that being introverted and being shy is NOT the same. To the people talking about how they were introverted and anxious and are now extroverted and free. You weren't introverted. You were a beta bitch terrified of social interaction. Now you're not. Introverts are capable of interacting socially just as well, if not better, than extroverts. They simply get tired of spending too much time with people after a while and like to take a break and relax by themselves. They are comfortable alone. Which is also a very important skill to have. Hence why I am very happy to be a mixture of introvert and extrovert.

The advice in this thread is pretty solid for people who are scared of talking to others and lack social skills. But these people do not necessarily have to be beta introverts. They may simply be beta extroverts.

[–]D2nny36 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Aside from the whole intro/extro stuff everyone is saying, thank you for these tips. It really helps to read things like this that I can do throughtout the day to help get over this awkwardness.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The only advice that actually helped me was RSD Tyler's video about free association and sounding exciting EVEN when saying something boring ( https://youtu.be/O8c-ijxS8CY ). If you can't "talk on and on" on the spot, or at least recognize you have this ability, you will psyche yourself into the classic "shit what should I say" psyche.

[–]ikigaiaru 0 points1 point  (4 children)

Excellent post!

I would venture to say about 70% of the people who claim to be "introverted" are just anxious and scared. Even if you are a 'true' introvert, it is good to learn how to at least act extroverted from time to time. These are all good tips, and basically boils down to- if you are scared of doing something (because of rejection) then you must DO exactly that.

[–]Fencer300 points points [recovered]

Common misconception. Introverted does not mean bad social skills at all. Introvert simply means that you don't need to spend as much time with other people to be happy and cherish time alone. I'm introverted and a few days ago I led a charity drive and it went awesome, no awkward moments and made some new friends because introverted =/= bad social skills

[–]ikigaiaru 0 points1 point  (2 children)

I'm the same as you and have to "recharge" after social interactions.

I never said introverted means bad social skills. I said most (not all) people who claim to be introverted are just socially anxious. Read my post again.

[–]J_AsapGem 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yea.. i find that i need to recharge my energy aswell after a social situation, drains the crap out of me.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My steps to being an "extrovert".

Step 1: Smoke weed. Step 2: go outside. Step 3: profit.

[–]highenergysanders 0 points1 point  (1 child)

say whatever you want (unfiltered)

Not 100% sure this applies to everyone.

[–]bunz-o-matic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If I removed my filter, the verbal abortion that would come out of my face hole would immediately warrant a restraining order.

[–]trickedout4eva -4 points-3 points  (1 child)

Worth a comment just to save the post

Nice work

[–]creamydank -3 points-2 points  (1 child)

Commenting to save for later

[–]DiggerClam 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is straight out of Goodlookingloser's Approach Anxiety Program; at least credit him if you're going to do him off.

[–]SirAttackHelicopter -3 points-2 points  (2 children)

Smile all the time? No. This is especially bad when you're transitioning, as you'll only come off as creepy. The best expression is to remain neutral with a very very slight hint of amused. Never maintain eye contact with a grin/smile/smirk because that will guarantee you being labeled a rapist.

[–]Fedor_Gavnyukov 1 point2 points  (1 child)

you should probably get off tumblr for a while

[–]SirAttackHelicopter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The only social media I use is reddit. And as you can tell from my history, it isn't all that much. And I would advise everyone here who wants to undertake TRP, to remove themselves from any and all social media. That shit is utterly useless to a man.