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I posted something not too long ago about whether AWALT is true in ALL cases as I'd presumed my girlfriend was "the one". The fellows in the comments gave me enough mistrust to decide that perhaps I should check her messages right when she left the room (something I wouldn't normally do, because I trusted her), but almost like clockwork, I found a group message with her and her friends, with her talking about how she wants to fuck this guy in her study group, a guy that was previously flirting with her over text and when I confronted her about it before, she claimed that she didn't think it was flirting and that she could handle herself.

In any case, right when she came back in the room I confronted her about it and she tried to rationalize it in some absurd ways, but needless to say I said "we're done" and walked out right there. She's been trying to call me and knock on my door and shit, but I'm just keeping up no contact.

We've been together for 3 years so it's somewhat solemn that she's just another woman when I took her for a unicorn for so long. In any case, I got a haircut and some new clothes earlier and plan on going out to get some new pussy tonight for the first time in 3 years.

All I can say is, thank you Redpill. Thank you so much.

[–]RatOfTheRec 653 points654 points  (19 children)

You're already movin in the right direction, brother. Good luck to you!

[–]co65 points points [recovered]

I wonder what excuse she'll tell her friends is the reason they broke up? Love to be a fly on the wall them days. Trust me, this is a hard lesson for her to learn. She's the one in pain and knows she screwed up. He could own his ex now, without any commitment towards her.

[–][deleted] 225 points226 points  (12 children)

She'll probably tell them that he was abusive and controlling and didn't trust her. These will be the same friends who were encouraging her to cheat on him.

[–]Slut_Slayer9000 137 points138 points  (5 children)

"Me and X broke up, he was really insecure and controlling, he snooped through my shit so I decided to break it off with him." Que "You go girl, girl power. Now you can go fuck Y from your class!"- Group chat.

[–]1theoctopuss 22 points23 points  (1 child)

They don't even understand the damage they're doing to themselves. She'll wake up when she's 30 wondering what happened.

[–]hamsterenema 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is precisely what she did.

[–]co65 points points [recovered]

Funny you should say that... I have never encouraged a man to cheat on his gf or wife. I do just the opposite. A married friend of mine, got 2 phone numbers 1 from a casual encounter and another from a girl at work. I told him delete those numbers as absolutely nothing good can come from it. If you leave a temptation like that hanging, you will bite the forbidden fruit. (I'm speaking from a position of a married man here. ) His wife is very cautious about other bitches, because she KNOWS how they are. She gives him as much sex as he wants, keeping his sack drained so he has no excuse to run.

[–]DadoFaayan 76 points77 points  (0 children)

A blowjob a day keeps the hoes away...

[–][deleted] 36 points37 points  (2 children)

I've got a buddy who's wife's sister is relentlessly pursuing him. He thinks he might be able to fuck her without it blowing up in his face. I have only ever told him he's crazy if he thinks that.

In my experience women think that just agreeing with whatever their friend wants to do is being supportive. They hardly ever call each other out on this kind of bullshit.

[–]coolred8611 21 points22 points  (0 children)

It WILL blow up in his face.

I made the mistake on fucking one of my exes while in a brand new relationship. She found my then gfs (now wife) Facebook, and proceeded to tell her EVERY LURID DETAIL of what happened, bc I didn't choose her after she's been pining after me for the longest time. The ex was fucking crazy, that's why I never made it official. I thought it was gonna be, one of those crazy last romps, shake hands, "it was good knowing you" and she goes her way and I, mine.

In short, don't do it. Of course it's hella tempting...but your sanity is worth more than the pussy being thrown at you.

[–]Bullfrog777 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I wonder what excuse she'll tel her friends is the reason hey broke up?

I know human nature and curiosity makes it so you would like to know, but it's probably best to not even think about it. Not only will you probably never know what she told her friends, but what she tells them will most likely be a lie. There's no need to defend yourself in these situations, just leave.

[–]Cozc 9 points10 points  (0 children)

She is in no pain. She has a vagina. I would be surprised if there was less then 5 different cocks inside her within a week of the breakup.

And she will actually be able to convince herself that her sluttiness is really admirable piety.

[–]DarkRenaissance 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Well, his dick is too small." That's exactly what she'll say.

[–]1OneRedSock 414 points415 points  (71 children)

My 7 year BP relationship from college ended on mutual terms, but a point of contention was definitely when I saw that her coworker was texting shit like "I bet you look good naked" and her responses were smiley faces and "Oh, you..." types of responses. I quickly found a history of many texts from him like this, and not once did she rebuff him.

I only happened to see it pop up on her phone one day, otherwise I never checked her shit -- trust and all that. When confronted she played it off as "Oh, he's just kidding. It's no big deal" The usual bullshit.

The irony, of course, being that she would constantly try to check my phone which bothered me, as I was 100% faithful. The lack of trust pissed me off, but even more so was seeing that she was doing the exact shit that she suspected me of doing.

TL;DR AWALT is fact.

[–]1ObnoxiousDrunk 366 points367 points  (28 children)

The irony, of course, being that she would constantly try to check my phone which bothered me, as I was 100% faithful. The lack of trust pissed me off, but even more so was seeing that she was doing the exact shit that she suspected me of doing.

That's known as classic projection. She doesn't trust you because she inherently knows she's untrustworthy and assumes everyone else is like her.

[–]justj6sh 68 points69 points  (3 children)

If someone doesn't trust you, and you've done nothing to earn that mistrust. It's a huge red flag of their own guilt/shady behavior.

[–]Cozc 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Does it count that in my opinion being female is plenty reason to not be trusted?

[–]abc69 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You shouldn't trust anyone, period.

[–]eatinrice points points [recovered]

So that's the name for it. My ex did the same thing, never trusted me and would fight with me when she found a lady texting me, then I found her snapchatting her ex, and saw that she was calling him for hours almost daily. Right when you think that they are special or a unicorn or whatever. AWALT is a hard pill to swallow but it keeps proving itself to be true

[–]Robotemist 70 points71 points  (3 children)

As did my ex. She would check my phone whenever I left the room, come to find out she was flirting with another dude.

Them cheating and acting inappropriate makes them realize how possible it is for it to happen to them. Ironically they find it acceptable from their part but they he damned if you do it.

Me being the beta at the time came up with every excuse for her. Never again.

[–]Lazysaurus 74 points75 points  (1 child)

It gives them good feelings when they do it. It gives them bad feelings when you do it. It's that simple.

[–]Eat_Animals 23 points24 points  (0 children)

This deserves more upvotes. Women don't think; they feel.

[–]Forcetobereckonedwit 49 points50 points  (1 child)

It's ALWAYS as soon as you start thinking "Hey, I might just go all in with this one.". E-v-e-r-y f-u-c-k-i-n-g t-i-m-e.

[–]hellshigh5 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I refused to put up with this shit , i messaged some girls over kik and strarted talking about , she was mad , but also asked if she is doing bad in bed and if this why i txt other girld

[–]SecretAsianMan27 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Damn it bro. AWALT really is a hard pill to swallow and it bloody sucks.

I love the cuddly feelings you get in a BP relationship but women just keep proving that AWALT. Time and time again.

At this point, I can understand why some MGTOW. Despite loving pussies, all the bullshit is depressing to deal with.


I've learnt from my personal experiences that women loves you when you treat them like trash. When you show them love and care, they'll always take you for granted and treat you like trash.

I keep trying to find a unicorn but everytime I try to see my women as anything but things made to serve me, it backfired. Everytime :\

[–]bluedrygrass 38 points39 points  (4 children)

That's known as classic projection. She doesn't trust you because she inherently knows she's untrustworthy and assumes everyone else is like her.

That's also why the people that throw around the term "racist" the most tends to be the biggest racists themself. They can't understand how could anyone else not judge anyone on race.

[–]muh_posts 18 points19 points  (3 children)

The biggest racists are the liberals in the big city. You look at their social circle and they are literally incapable of seeing other races as equals and friends.

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (2 children)

Doesn't even have to be big cities. I'm from a leftist town in NJ. It's nauseating listen to people talk about morality, tolerance, and acceptance when the only minority they ever see is their friendly Chinese dry cleaner. Moving to a less affluent, more 'multicultural' town was the biggest red pill for me.

[–]Ou-tis 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Uber moral leftists in my country babble about diversity,strangers welcome and so...but they live in ivory towers and don't want refugees or other coloured scum near their houses or where they go for vacation.

[–]John_McFly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And it's amazing the things they'll say to the dry cleaner.

A friend is first generation American, her mom is from SEA and doesn't talk in English but can understand just enough to run their dry cleaning shop. A few days a month, my friend will help out at the shop, everyone assumes she doesn't speak English because she talks to her mom in their native tongue. The customers that say anything mean get a quick lesson in manners with tons of profanity.

[–]yesanothersephiroth 21 points22 points  (0 children)

My ex-'unicorn' of almost 11 years to a T.

[–]user_none 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Good to see someone else replied with the explanation of projection.

  • Accused of cheating, yet you've been faithful? Yep, the other person is probably cheating.

  • Does he/she want to check your phone/Facebook/email, etc...? Yep, they've probably got incriminating evidence in their account.

  • Does he/she start taking the phone into the bathroom, when in the past he/she didn't? Probably chatting with a new love interest.

  • Does he/she quickly close a laptop lid, or minimize/close browser windows/tabs, or turn off mobile devices when you come around? You guessed it.

  • Has he/she started a new regimen of getting in better shape, and it's at your exclusion? Hint, it's not to attract you.

I could go on, but eh, AWALT.

[–]beeringbanterer 18 points19 points  (1 child)

Yes. I think it's also some psychological trick like, "I know I AM lying and hiding shit, so if I act suspicious towards HIM and talk about trust/honesty it will seem like I really care about these things (therefore he will think I'm trustworthy and deflect suspicion away from me)" As we can see its often the opposite.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

as stated this is classic projection but its also classic example of plausible deniability

She didnt flirt! How dare you accuse her highness of misbehavior?

You insecure misogynist shitlord

[–]Dokkobro 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Bro every.fucking.time.

She who smelt it dealt it.

Don't get me wrong, sometimes bitches are just jealous, but when it's a constant subject... it's because it's constantly on her mind.

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet 31 points32 points  (1 child)

Mods, award a point right here.

[–]MEpicLevelCheater[M] 19 points20 points  (0 children)


[–]Cozc 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What is it called when I have never nor ever will cheat on a partner, but am damn near convinced they're all cheating/will cheat on me?

Probably just plain old insecurity lol

[–]LordThunderbolt 61 points62 points  (3 children)

If they accuse you of something it's because they're doing it themselves. She's accusing you of cheating out of nowhere? She cheated or she's about to cheat. She's accusing you of talking to other chicks? She's talking to other guys herself.

Never fall for or dupe yourself into thinking "I trust her". Trust nobody.

[–]Forcetobereckonedwit 43 points44 points  (1 child)

Upvoted but I think of it in a different light. I trust them. I trust them to be liars, hypergamous sluts, and branch swinging whores.

I am never disappointed.

[–]theONE843663 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That's the real truth right here! You'll never be disappointed if you are expecting it and just playing along.

[–]JustinDX 39 points40 points  (7 children)

Exact situation x 3 (3 relationships)

Thankfully I was smart to end it once the messages are seen and AWALT surfaces.

TRP <3

[–]bigk12345[🍰] 36 points37 points  (6 children)

Exact situation x4.

Funny how women are no longer some mythical, erotic creatures once you see the same pattern over and over again and TRP breaks it down to a science.

[–]MuhTriggersGuise 31 points32 points  (2 children)

As a man, aging is awesome. You see women for what they are, they lose complete power over you. Your life comes together a lot more (if you've been working at it), your charisma and charm are off the charts (again, if you've been developing yourself over time), and basically if you don't fuck yourself by getting married or having kids, you're set for the rest of your life being awesome on easy mode. It's great.

Women on the other hand, have a tremendous amount of power when they're young. They can do no wrong in most of society's eyes, and betas are falling over backwards to accommodate them in any way they can. But man, I feel bad for them. Once they hit that wall, their life is practically over, and all the have left is cats, hopefully a good relationship with their children, and the sad ability to milk whatever poor sap married them or knocked them up. What a miserable existence.

I am certainly glad I am a man and had to pay my dues when I was young, and now can reap the benefits; instead of being a woman who is handed their power, yet burn out young and spend the majority of her life reminiscing her hey day, living with no talent and ability, and only being able to impact the world by making other people's lives shittier.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

you're set for the rest of your life being awesome on easy mode

Just wanted to say I love this analogy. It's so perfect if you grew up on Nintendo and Sega. Hard Mode was usually just so hard, and playing the game was a chore. It was stressful and time-consuming. You didn't really even want to play. Switching to Easy was a whole new ballgame. It was always enjoyable and you felt like master of your domain. This holds so true with life. Growing up, if you do things right (save money, hold frame with women, give to others, etc.), is like switching from Hard mode in your teens/20s to Easy mode in your 30s/40s. It's a beautiful thing.

[–]Ou-tis 1 point2 points  (0 children)

" living with no talent and ability, and only being able to impact the world by making other people's lives shittier" Yes

[–]Forcetobereckonedwit 9 points10 points  (2 children)

It's mathematics really. Once you see the pattern everything is obvious.

[–]MuhTriggersGuise 12 points13 points  (1 child)

I agree but it's not just mathematics, it's evolution. You can see how the behavior has propagated the species. It's hard to even get mad at them. It's their nature. A man can be with peace with much of his existence if he stops thinking of humans being some altruistic being above animals, and acknowledges they are animals. If you can truly accept that, much more makes sense and you can navigate the world much more easily.

[–][deleted] 65 points66 points  (15 children)

Real talk she have snapchat? Then he saw her naked alot.

In a givin month ill have around ten different chicks sending me nudes , some of them are chicks accrosed the country, one is gay, a few are married. All that I keep in semi regular contact with because why not and I like nude pics.

Snapchat is a cheaters app. And I love it. Don't house wife a whore gents, and they are all whores.

[–]MrAnderzon 40 points41 points  (11 children)

I remember reading that was one of the main reasons Snapchat was created. To give someone the illusion nobody is going to find out. Which is totally wrong.

[–]garbagejooce 23 points24 points  (0 children)

Remember reading that? That's literally the entire premise. Sexting. I thought that was so blatantly obvious. The only reason the shit's supposed to disappear. At least in the beginning when it was just used by college kids

[–]EmpReb 9 points10 points  (6 children)

Yup. People said "but it deletes in five seconds..." and I was just shaking my head thinking they had forgot the damn capture screen feature BUILT INT TO THEIR DAMN PHONES.

[–]PrimeNumber301 points points [recovered]

But the app shows you if someone screenshotted your snap. I don't know if that's what it was like from the beginning though.

[–]FatStig points points [recovered]

It wasn't. Even now you can root the phone and save it without her knowing. At least on android. You can also record a video of the screen and it doesn't tell them it is recorded. Without rooting. Even when they send videos. It's impossible to enforce if you have a dev/rooted phone. And shit the NSA and the CIA both record all that shit.

[–]stfarn 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Take a photo of the phone with another phone?

[–]the_number_2 4 points5 points  (0 children)

When it first launched, it would only delete images every so often, so batches of images would get stored on your phone with the extension ".NOMEDIA"; all you had to do was change the extension to ".JPG" and BOOM, photo.

[–]LLL3peat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You don't even have to root. Just get a screen recorder app and you are golden. Works like a charm if you really really want it

[–]ITS_JUST_2015_BRO 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah or just use your laptop webcam and record you opening the snapchat and holding it to the camera. Undetectable...

[–]Duchat 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I had an apprentice, 21 year old, volunteer fireman, a "nice" Chad. We had a lot of time together testing equipment and talking about life. He's hooked up to all this, being young and sexy. He used a snapchat emulator app that saves any pics and doesn't let the other person know and had a whole folder of tits and asses. Those were fun times.

[–]commander_zoidberg 2 points3 points  (1 child)

I'm sure i read somewhere Snapchat is spending $200 million on cloud storage. I bet they have everyone's naked pictures and are just working out how to charge people for not releasing them.

[–]MrAnderzon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I believe you. The photo's don't just disappear/deleted

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

If a girl has Snapchat, Instagram, or uses Facebook or any other type of validation app on the regular she is plate worthy only. Which means of course most women are only good for fucking

[–]bojsihtekat points points [recovered]

I'm 43, and 100% of the jealous gf's in my life have been jealous because they would do the wrong thing if they were in the situation they're jealous of me being in.

I keep trying to find an exception to this rule, but it's 100%, no exceptions.

Even for us men...if we're jealous of our gf's/plates, it's because we'd do the wrong thing if we were in their shoes. 100%...no exceptions.

[–]Azzmo 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I'm an exception to your rule. I autistically adhere to honorable and fair behavior but I've felt plenty of jealousy and mistrust in relationships.

A few years ago I helped a bachelorette party push their suitcase cart to their suite and denied increasingly desperate invitations to come in. They were thirsty and they were almost all hot. Wished them a good night and was on my way because I made a commitment to my girlfriend and I do not make commitments unless I intend to honor them.

Your rule is true 99% of the time though.

[–]Daxxipro1804 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for spreading your message around. We need more shared experiences from the people who've been through it all.

[–]kankouillotte 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The irony, of course, being that she would constantly try to check my phone which bothered me, as I was 100% faithful. The lack of trust pissed me off, but even more so was seeing that she was doing the exact shit that she suspected me of doing.

Because she was projecting. When a girl has severe trust issues, it means she fears you would do to her what she knows she can do to you. She knows she can, so that's only a small step to actually doing it.

[–]severeXD 6 points7 points  (0 children)

suspicion haunts the mind of the guilty

[–]Pyrocyde 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I've had something similar happen to me. Such bullshit.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Her being all up in your phone, etc. is often a good sign she's hiding something.

That's something I can def. get on board with.

People don't need to be all in your communication tools unless they have something to hide.

[–]AssMaster95 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Bro, I once had a girlfriend that would have no shame in checking my phone every day, not just my texts but even my emails. I checked her stuff once, with her guidance for whatever reason and all seemed okay but odd. Her text message conversations only had me. Then towards the end I checked her Facebook and saw she was talking to other guys behind my back and ended it.

[–]juniorcoleman 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Holy shit, same exact thing happened to me. And she tried making me look like the crazy one. AWALT for sure.

[–]Bascome 2 points3 points  (0 children)

People suspect others of doing what they themselves are capable of.

If someone is always suspicious of thieves, it is more likely they will steal.

[–]flatox 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thief thinks everyone steals.

[–]needforhealing 139 points140 points  (0 children)

You dodged a bullet. Don't even hold grudges, just move on. That will be the best justice.

[–][deleted] 136 points137 points  (2 children)

It's sad how women do this once a guy emotionally invests in them. It's really just a game to them when, especially if they wanted a family and kids, they'd realize the toxicity of this behavior. But they don't, that's just how they are.

[–]godmarck points points [recovered]

Yeah. For some reason they love doing it to a guy who has invested. Some sort of sick revenge for liking them. Who knows.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Women with daddy issues get off on hurting men. Also, women cannot win in physical violence against men (for the most part) so emotional violence is what they use to indulge that aggressive side.

[–]ioef_afterdark 74 points75 points  (3 children)

Very similar story happened to a friend of mine a few years back with his then fiancee. He checked her phone and was enraged to find out she was sending nudes to some guy and texting about him with some of her friends. Instead of confronting her then, my friend played it off for a few days, then he dropped the "We're done" bomb. When she asked why he would only say "You know why", and then he completely ghosted her. Massive drama ensued, with her accusing each of her friends of ratting her out. My friend was buddies with one of his fiancee's friend's husband; after the drama hit the guy eventually divorced her for being such an enabling cunt. The fiancee moved out of town within a few months of the breakup.

[–]blasted_biscuits 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Anecdotal proof that ghosting is the most powerful tool a man has with a woman. Some might say it's the only power a man has over a woman.

[–]Frenetic_Zetetic 1 point2 points  (0 children)

EPIC next/ghost technique! 11/10. More proof of this reality being more common than many would like. Engaged? Married? Have several kids? Doesn't factor into their equation.

[–]Goateeki points points [recovered]

You're going to reach a point where you think you've pushed her away enough and that you've taught her a lesson. Your next thought will be that you can let her back in because you've asserted yourself and she knows who's boss, etc.

DO NOT DO IT. The greatest feeling in life -- I mean it's better even than destroying your enemies -- is to go so cold and silent on a no good woman that she cannot bear the silence, and every second of it is pain to her. Of course, it's just the pain of confronting reality, something most men do every day. You must never let her back in. Never.

So you saw that she wants to fuck some guy in her study group. Sometimes the nicest thing you can do for someone is give them exactly what they want.

[–]APock 46 points47 points  (2 children)

DO NOT DO IT. The greatest feeling in life -- I mean it's better even than destroying your enemies -- is to go so cold and silent on a no good woman that she cannot bear the silence, and every second of it is pain to her. Of course, it's just the pain of confronting reality, something most men do every day. You must never let her back in. Never.

I agree that you must never let them back in, but the rest this paragraph has this sort of "revenge porn" feeling wich I know we all like to believe it's true.

But the truth is, woman are biologically programmed to forget you as soon as you step out of the picture, she's not "suffering every second" of her day because you ghosted her, she's too busy being pampered, and fucked, by all her orbiters.

She might think of you with some remorse every now and then, but don't get hang up on this revenge fantasy because you're only lying to yourself.

[–]omega_dawg93 22 points23 points  (0 children)

this is very true. when they check out of a relationship, they are hurt. but it's more like a bee sting than a long term battle against a debilitating disease.

next thing ya know, some other dude is suffering thru her emotional roller coaster & she's catching his cum with a smile.

life has moved on...and so should you.

[–]HobKing 49 points50 points  (17 children)

Question about the AWALT theory: If all women are like this, then what's a "no good woman" if not just a woman? Sounds like if you reject all women like this, you might as well turn gay now because you know a priori that you won't ever find one that's different.

If you believe/know all women are the same in that way, how can that characteristic be used as cause for rejection? I feel like it can't, and that TRP is more about accepting that and dealing with it. Finding out that your girl is "like that" can't itself be a valid reason to reject, or you've backed yourself into a corner where you must reject all women before even meeting them.

[–]10J18R1A 121 points122 points  (5 children)

You don't necessarily have to reject all of them, as there are various levels. You just have to always be prepared and never be surprised. She's not yours forever, just yours today.

What you'll end up finding in a weird kind of way is that the more you learn about women, the less you'll end up chasing them or sweating them, the more they will chase you and behave themselves. Dread game and the constant need for affirmation are truths.

Doesn't mean you can't have fun. Doesn't mean you can't like a woman. Doesn't mean that women are inherently bad. But if you stay ready you don't have to get ready, red pill knowledge is just the seat belt and defensive driving of relationships .

[–]bigk12345[🍰] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

This is so true. Once I found TRP and all the misogynistic shitlords here, the concept of dread, ghosting and nexting was foreign to me.

I started looking back at my relationships to see if any of those applied in previous relationship.

Two come to mind.

First one: Relationship of 4 years, which should have ended because she was needy, no father and I was just scared to lose her. Constantly breaking up and getting back because of hot sex. During one of our fights, I yelled " I don't love you anymore" on top of my lungs. I didn't even realize what I said. Of course, for the next month, she prepared me meals and great sex. Of course, it only lasted a month because she got too secure again, went travelling with slutty ass gfs to cancun for spring break, branch swung to another loser right after. Funniest thing we never had a break up talk. We just stopped talking.

I was supposed to "just get it" that it is over.

Second one: BPD ex. Any girl hitting on me in front of her, or even looking at another girl ( I shit you not), would result in fights that "men are pigs". A hot girl would walk by and she would stare at me to see if I looked. Of course, she was an Alpha Widow and got pumped and dumped too many times.

It is funny how girls do self destruct over time. This born again Christian went from self prescribed angel to a cheater, an alpha widow and who had an abortion before me.

During the last week of our relationship, we barely spoke because I was depressed with personal shit and no one to turn to. This was painful to her because her cheating ass could not get closure if I ghosted and her hamster was freaking out.

[–]omega_dawg93 5 points6 points  (0 children)

this ^ post is pure gospel.

[–]IMR800X 2 points3 points  (0 children)

just yours today

Or, at least the next 45 minutes anyway. Beyond that, no one can say, least of all her.

[–]1DubbleFUPAwitCheez 22 points23 points  (3 children)

I take awalt as, don't forget all women are capable of that.

[–]asspwner 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Yeah. Same here. But what about us men? Are we not also capable of that? Is awalt something that applies just to women?

[–]1DubbleFUPAwitCheez 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You can see it if you look. An easy example is if a guy can choose between a still attractive 32 year old single mother and a bangin 20 year old he's going with the 20 year old. All dudes are like that. The things men and women are designed to chase are different but they are still the basis of our nature and we will follow it. Heartiste calls it the god of biomechanics

[–]Forcetobereckonedwit 19 points20 points  (0 children)

You just learn that that's the way they are going in. Everything has a best-used-by-date, relationships included. Some are worth 40 years, some 20, some months, some weeks, some a few hours.

[–]nonanon111 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Great comment.

Maybe the better model is not that they always behave that way, but that all of them are capable of behaving that way - and that no action on your part will allow you to predict or prevent it.

Like a wild animal that is sometimes manageable and cooperative, but that at other times goes berzerk for no reason and mauls its trainer to death.

Men are conditioned into the fantasy that male behaviour codes also apply to women: respect and honour will encourage loyalty, being true to one's word is universally preferred, debts should be repaid, fair fighting, etc. The modern western woman may follow those codes sometimes, but they are all capable of ignoring them or acting in the opposite way and nobody can ever predict when - and no amount of love, sacrifice or provision for her will guard against it. Future incentives (money, fame) can shift the odds, but it's no guarantee, and past incentives are meaningless.

[–]LordThunderbolt 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You don't have to be in a relationship to fuck someone. You can fuck and hangout but never forget that she'll never be "yours". So enjoy the decline and live your life.

[–]SnickeringBear 4 points5 points  (0 children)

All Women Are Like That It Varies Only In Degree - Awaltivoid

I can make a good argument that some women are not like that, but they have flaws that prevent consideration for a serious relationship.

Don't arbitrarily reject. Consider carefully what you are getting from a relationship and if you reach a point where you are putting in more than you receive, it is time to re-evaluate and perhaps exit stage left.

You will run into a range of types such as Serial Support Sally who gets married and divorced several times over the years as she searches for someone to pay her bills. She is usually attractive physically but is not a good companion.

Then there is the classic "have my cake and eat it too" who wants a man or three to keep her interested and have fun with.

Of course, there is always a black widow or two who are looking for a way to trap a man into becoming her personal ATM. The typical method is to get pregnant while supposedly using birth control. Advanced technique is to pick a rich beta and make him emotionally dependent and therefore a non-ending source of wealth.

The best advice is to live deliberately meaning to bring into your life what you choose and exclude what you don't. Avoid putting yourself in a position where anyone can take away your hard earned lifestyle.

[–]Nergaal 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You have to accept AWALT like you accept the fact that you irrationally like pussy. It is irrelevant if you think it is a good thing. It is how the world revolves.

[–]Ou-tis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

10J18R1A is right. AWALT is real,but we live in a society,not in the wild nature and we have rules to mantain it. Men have too some instinct bad for society,like killing a man and impregnate his woman. But we don't tolerate it anymore. So for women,they can act by behaviors considered good. But good for what? Maybe a girl is good just for bang few times,maybe another is good to give birth to your sons. You have to judge them,and don't be afraid of doing it.

[–]beeringbanterer 52 points53 points  (0 children)

Sorry to hear it, but great that you took it like a man and didn't let her emotionally manipulate you into staying with her. That said, there are so many avenues of communication these days with smartphones. Facebook, Insta, Snapchat, Tinder, Dating Apps, Skype...closed and private groups as well...Tell me a decent looking modern chick who doesn't have a bunch of men available at the press of a finger on her smartphone.

[–]a_chill_bro 51 points52 points  (0 children)

It's better to live in reality than in that fantasy land of "Oneitis."

You did well.

[–]BullshittingNonsense 82 points83 points  (5 children)

Damn 3 years sunk in. AWALT is absurdly true I guess

[–]MuhTriggersGuise 36 points37 points  (2 children)

Eh don't make a sunk cost fallacy. It was three years of a good relationship (at the time) where OP got sex and fun and hopefully some good food. He was aware of redpill theory and kept it in the back of his mind, and now that he's facing AWALT he's able to handle it with composure instead of melting down or ruining his own life. It wasn't time wasted, it's just time to move on now that she's ruined their dynamic. Oh well, plenty of women out there.

[–]RPStone 8 points9 points  (1 child)

All women are temporary, time is never wasted.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Exactly, OP did good so far, but I think the next level is to be able to break it off but keep her as a plate/fuck-buddy.

To promote someone to full LTR right off the bat is the key problem, women need to be trained otherwise the barrier to cheating is so low that it will only ever be a temporary thing.

[–]thewrightstuff88 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There is no such thing as relationship equity. You may value the time and effort you put in but she will never care when shit hits the fan. At that point it's too late anyways.

[–]spartan1337 28 points29 points  (4 children)

Good for you, at least you only lost 3 years with a whore, i wasted 12 only to get to the same realization.

[–]Jak3rz97 0 points1 point  (1 child)

How do you get over all the nostalgia?

[–]Dogonapillow 22 points23 points  (7 children)

we rent out the basement and we got a new tenant, my dad's girlfriend was in the living room which has a big window into the street

anyway she saw the woman in this guys car kissing, she left the car and went into the basement, 20 minutes later some different guy parks and goes into the basement

i found her facebook and it says " in a relationship "

[–]OilyB 23 points24 points  (6 children)

I've been 'Chad' to a number of married women, man. They fuck me and then go home a 'faithful, obedient, subservient wife'. Without having taken a shower. Some even introduced their husband to me. Meeting them, you'd NEVER, EVER think they shamelessly cheat on their naive husbands.

[–]Dogonapillow 11 points12 points  (4 children)

yeah marriage doesn't appeal to me very much

[–]LOLMUFFINLOL -2 points-1 points  (2 children)

I don't get this.. how do you expect to populate the world if you never get married. Do you just plan to fuck bitches till the day you drop dead and be a genetic dead end? I'm not calling TRP bullshit, I'm just trying to find the logic in this

[–]Hotdawg179 6 points7 points  (0 children)

The world has absolutely no problem being populated. If anything overpopulation will be a problem.

[–]Endorsed ContributorAuvergnat 43 points44 points  (0 children)

I posted something not too long ago about whether AWALT is true in ALL cases as I'd presumed my girlfriend was "the one".

THIS is what AWALT truly means. The emphasis is not about what exactly is "that" which they all are, but they fact that they all follow the female pattern. It's just a way to say that no, your girlfriend is no exception.

[–]NeoreactionSafe 55 points56 points  (3 children)


I found a group message with her and her friends, with her talking about how she wants to fuck this guy in her study group


AWALT means the desire to do this type of thing is always there.

Does he do it?

...that depends on the situation.

If it was the 1800's and Marriage 1.0 probably not.

Today... the Cock Carousel™ calls them all... it's on television after all.


[–][deleted] 27 points28 points  (0 children)

If she has snapchat, look at her Snapchat history and see if she sends PM's and pictures she how long of a string of messages she has with some one.

If you don't have the app of you "snap" back and forth with a girl it adds a tally to the number of days of consecutive conversation you have.... but other then that and who sent the last message you can't look at any of the content.... aka a cheaters wet dream for full proof sex contact with strangers and you not being able to see.

[–]I_AM_CALAMITY 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Finally. AWALT confuses so many people but this is dead on.

[–]NeoreactionSafe 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The Branch Swing is the action.

Hypergamy is just the emotional urge to trade up and to look up at men through the eyes of the women.


[–]nicetimeisback points points [recovered]

Men to women are like Christmas gifts.

They love the unwrapping act, but once the gift is unwrapped, no more surprise, no more enjoyment.

All ltr are bound to fail.

[–]10J18R1A 29 points30 points  (5 children)

Cat string theory at its finest.

[–]ellenpaoisanazi 2 points3 points  (4 children)

Whats the cat string theory?

[–]10J18R1A 44 points45 points  (1 child)

So if you hold a piece of string just out of reach of a cat, like dangle it over them, the cat will break its back trying to get to it.

If you lay that piece of string down, however, the cat is no longer interested.

So it is with women. The moment she knows she has you, she doesn't want you.

[–]ellenpaoisanazi 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Interesting way to put it. Thanks for explaining it.

[–]Askada 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Making her want to have something she thinks she cannot have. That something is you.

[–]ellenpaoisanazi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I see. Thanks for explaining.

[–]jazerac 4 points5 points  (3 children)

The only way for a LTR not to fail is to continue surprises and live an exciting life.

[–]jessesoccer 0 points1 point  (2 children)

sounds like an uphill battle for someone who'll leave you once you stop performing tricks for her.

[–]jazerac 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Nah, no tricks. She just comes along for the ride and is totally cool with being told what to do and to have her days fills with what I want to do.

[–]Blemper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When Beta Bob is himself and doesn't even make me feel like I need variety, strength, speed, power, size.

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (1 child)

don't text her if ur drink and empty handed.

[–][deleted] 34 points35 points  (2 children)

I'm glad you see the truth and it's fine to next her and begin fresh with new women as a man who gets it.

Its worth noting that every bitch has guys in her pink phone that she wants to fuck and has kept waiting in reserve (in case you get eaten by a dinosaur)

The real issue here was your faulty expectations that she could be trusted and was special and different and blah blah blah

Now, Im not suggesting you swear off evil women. Or relationships if that's your thing.

Just start living a life where other women talk about wanting to fuck you and whatever women you are involved with knows she is with a man who has boundaries and will enforce them by walking away and whistling dixie

TLDR... Don't sweat a woman cheating. Just be your woman's best alternative and always be willing to leave and everything will turn out ok

[–]alltrueism 9 points10 points  (1 child)

I'm always one foot out the door now, unfortunately for them.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

thats where you are wrong. not to have 1 foot out the door, thats smart.

the fact that you havent recognized that women are happiest when desperately clinging to a superior man. that state of submission is where women feel happiest despite the reprogramming of today's falsespeak.

ever seen a woman with a kiss ass rich husband who doesnt properly lead because he believes thats not equality? She nags and snipes at him. cheats. and likely leaves when a more suitable option appears.

[–]MrAnderzon 28 points29 points  (0 children)

I'm proud of you OP. Not all guys could leave their self pronounced "Unicorn".

[–]murvish45 11 points12 points  (5 children)

Basically i find most girls will be different initially and maintain that for maybeee a year or two if its an LTR but eventually AWALT.

[–]MuhTriggersGuise 14 points15 points  (4 children)

maybeee a year or two

That is what the young men may not realize. They can put up a facade for years. Long enough for you to think NAWALT and put a ring on her. But once that facade drops, you're fucked.

[–]murvish45 13 points14 points  (3 children)

Yeah I've been in an LTR for 2.5 years. Have yet to argue or fight, and she acts like a unicorn. But im not letting myself get lazy.

The reason she's like this is because my game is tight not cause shes "different" or a "good girl"

[–]PizzaFaceGuy 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Can you go into detail about your game. I want to have a relationship like that one day.

[–]Ou-tis 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm interested too in the details of your game with your LTR

[–]MuhTriggersGuise 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I've been in a similar boat. She acts like a unicorn because you keep a tight game and don't get lazy. Keep it up, and she will too. Drop the ball (by choice or circumstance), and I wouldn't gamble on her being there for the long haul.

[–]DysfunctionalBrother 12 points13 points  (1 child)

Girls have so many options nowadays since the so called "sexual revolution" that it's hard for them to stay commited. They don't have to have as much self control as our grandparents did and wont be shamed by society for sleeping around, instead the person who shames gets shamed. "How dare you shame someone to disuade them from developing a reputation that will make them not marriage or relationship material".

Classic example of "have your cake and eat it"

Not saying this is you OP, but also the difficulty is that most guys are boys, not men, and women want men, so if there is a guy who is percieved as being more alpha or dominant then women will cheat or think about cheating on their boyfriend with him (some may even leave their boyfriend first, but only so they can fuck the alpha and then come back if the fucking doesn't develop into a LTR), it's just female nature.

Anyway big up OP.

[–]throwawayclarkken 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Happy for you brother . The ease that you did it makes me wonder why others can't be like you .

Well done reddit we saved one :)

[–]LordThunderbolt 23 points24 points  (2 children)

Let this be a lesson out there for all the guys who think they're hot shit and have found a unicorn. Reality check: You haven't and they don't exist. When we say AWALT we literally mean AWALT; your mom, your sister, your grandma, your gf, it all applies to them too. You're not special and you damn sure don't have the perfect thot detector. Just because she's your girl it doesn't mean she's not up to trifling.

[–]Shaman6624 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I don't even know what a unicorn would be.. A girl who keeps loving you and stays attracted to you even if you become a slob, also who isn't attracted to other men? Is that what they mean by unicorn?

[–]LordThunderbolt 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A mythical creature of great beauty. Many legends speak of it, but no actual proof of its existence has ever been found.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (1 child)

It is a sad but true fact. There is nothing nice about knowing the truth, but it is better than being deceived and broken. There are no exceptions to AWALT, a woman may be loyal temporarily, but only if you are her best option. Read the Manipulated Man, it will open your eyes even further.

[–]newflame97 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Proud of you bro. Keep your head up.

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon 8 points9 points  (2 children)

We've been together for 3 years so ...

This is about the maximum time you can maintain somewhat exclusive sexual interest from a woman.

After that they assume you're a beta, go off sex, and push for marriage.

This whole "trust" thing is garbage. Men entering into a LTR are making a huge investment in time, resources, opportunity cost and risk. We should not be expected to do this on a trust basis. Women do not have to trust men - they get all their rights and insurances enshrined in law (alimony, child support, instant victim status on a whim) and only engage with men on a negligible risk basis (ie we have to prove everything to their satisfaction prior to any form of sex or commitment).

Yet women insist on being trusted... why? Because this gives them maximum opportunity to branch swing but keep their options open to maintain our support.

TL;DR trust is a beta characteristic and means "I give you the option to secretly betray me".

[–]VTMSCHVSVCTRY points points [recovered]

I recently wrote a post called "TRP - Lessons In Economics". You pretty much just summed up the entire post in this comment. They are maximizing their economic value. The most fucked up thing in this world is that men are being told to do the opposite. Society is blatantly telling men to not maximize their value. In economics, that's a fucking sin. They call it inefficiency.

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The most fucked up thing in this world is that men are being told to do the opposite. Society is blatantly telling men to not maximize their value. In economics, that's a fucking sin. They call it inefficiency.

This is why we call it a gynocentric society.

[–]thomascoopers 9 points10 points  (10 children)

How did she try and justify it? I know there's always the typical justifications people come up with - but I'm just curious how she struggled with it?

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (7 children)

Well the message exactly that she sent her friends was a link to a Twitter post that was about sexting which read "fuck me in the school hallway. Fuck me when I'm drunk. Fuck me before bed.." etc. Just shit like that, along with a message afterward which read "@(his name) to me plz, all of the above."

Upon seeing this I had initially assumed it was her telling her friends she wants said guy to do that shit to her. She tried to explain to me that she meant the guy has been saying those things to her and she was telling her friends about it, and that she didn't want to tell me he was requesting they fuck frequently because "she isn't into him" and "she can handle herself".

Frankly, I took this as a last minute made up bullshit to explain her telling her friends how she wants to bang her group mate.

At this point though, I don't give a fuck who she bangs. I'm going to try and just move on with shit. Maybe I'll get back into playing violin.

[–]kankouillotte 10 points11 points  (0 children)

"@(his name) to me plz, all of the above."

this is pretty clear, there's no confusion. She said she want him to fuck her all the time, straight up, to her friends.

Her explanation is bullshit

[–]MuhTriggersGuise 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Maybe I'll get back into playing violin.

A bit of monk mode activities are always good after a breakup. Throw yourself into some of your passions for a while and get your ex relationship out of your head. Good luck man!

[–]muh_posts 6 points7 points  (2 children)

Women are masters of spin. They will literally construct a whole new story out of whole cloth, using only the words in an existing sentence creatively.

[–]Lsegundo 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thats why ghosting them is the best option. Don't give them the opportunity to sing their Siren song and use your feelings to fuck with your head.

[–]Mensphysique12 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was actually rather impressed with the spin, better than something I could spin at a moments notice haha

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did she actually @ to him on twitter? I'm still confused.

[–]alltrueism 13 points14 points  (1 child)

"he's just a friend, nothing more"

[–]MuhTriggersGuise 5 points6 points  (0 children)

That should be a huge red flag when "friends with benefits" is a well known thing. A "friend" to a female means she isn't romantically attached to them. It does not mean they wouldn't/aren't fucking them.

[–]Fedor_Gavnyukov 8 points9 points  (1 child)

had a similar thing happen to me a couple years back. after 3 years she actually cheated, but I did find group messages on her phone as well going back and forth with her sluts about whether she should stay with me or the other guy. I made the choice for her and guess what, the other guy obviously didn't want her either. fuck these broken cunts. shit hurt because I really cared about her and treated her well. she begged to work it out, but one thing I do have is self respect.

[–]Lsegundo 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Boss move. Talking to her friends about it means she was looking for an opportunity so it could "just happen"TM

[–]RMK24 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I read your previous post, and it is literally the classic story we hear all the time. Just know you did the right thing.

[–]Arnoux 4 points5 points  (6 children)

This story almost sounds too good to be true. (I mean no whining, no second chance etc) If that happened what you have written, you handled it like a bauws.

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (5 children)

As I said in my previous post, I've always had very Redpill ideals before even discovering TRP.

I do admit that I am feeling emotionally quite lonely now, but I wager that the primary cause of that is simply the detachment from normalcy. Being in a relationship you are constantly in communications with somebody else, and it is just odd to be completely detached at the moment.

Interestingly my friends have all noted today that I am terribly calm about the whole ordeal.. they think I'm trying to "look manly" and that "it's cool if I'm sad" but honestly, although I am certainly sad to a degree, I see no reason to wallow in it.

[–]Arnoux 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Being in a relationship you are constantly in communications with somebody else, and it is just odd to be completely detached at the moment.

I know this. Luckily you can substitute this with other girls, as girls like to chit chat all day. This is what I did in the past.

[–]aDrunkenWhaler 2 points3 points  (0 children)

And when you'll bang new pussy they'll say you're trying to compensate for feeling down and lonely. Fuck that noise. Do your thing man.

[–]muh_posts 2 points3 points  (0 children)

nterestingly my friends have all noted today that I am terribly calm about the whole ordeal.. they think I'm trying to "look manly" and that "it's cool if I'm sad"

Stay the course. Better this than they lose respect for you if you look like a beta to them. Men are supposed to be stoic, but society places a giant shit-test on boys by telling them it's OK if they cry, but then treating them like shit if they do.

[–]Askada 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You seem perfectly fine emotionally and cool headed, based on your posts.

[–]MuhTriggersGuise 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hopefully you handle it well indefinitely, but if you ever are feeling bad, remember, there are a lot of men who support you and relate to your situation. Stay strong brother. How you're handling this betrayal makes us proud, and you will come out on top if you can work your way with it maintaining such poise and character.

[–]omega_dawg93 4 points5 points  (0 children)

"...going out to get some new pussy for the first time in 3 yrs."

this....THIS is where you fucked up.

she was on a pedestal with "oneitis" stamped at the base of it.

go to bed, bath & beyond and buy some plates. ALWAYS KEEP a few plates around.

[–]Five_Decades 6 points7 points  (0 children)


Half of all women have a backup man in case the main relationship fails.

Add in all the women who cheat because they want their kids to have genetic diversity (four kids from four Chad's provides more genetic diversity than four kids from one Chad) and Yeah, a lot of women are going to fuck around.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Man I made a post about chasing a girl in a relationship such a similar story... weird.

But yeah AWALT...

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

you are a stronger man than me, I can tell you that. my stupid self would have rationalized this shit.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

deleted What is this?

[–]YiloMiannopoulos 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Give us an update on all the new pussy you're gonna slay.

[–]MonsterinNL1986 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You should have grabbed your ex-GF by pussy before you had left.

[–]Forcetobereckonedwit 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Phew! Stick to your guns brother. You know she'll get to you some way and you'll reconsider. Stay firm. You had a good run. You'll find another, just as hot.

[–]EscortSportage 3 points4 points  (0 children)

3years, your a better man then me, christ, 3 years. NEVER ever done that, Good stuff just walking away, Dont invest so much time in these fun emotional creatures, they are dopamine dumps (enjoy the game and the field) but more importantly focus on yourself, your passion, hobby etc

the women will come, thats the easy part.

[–]JohnnySkidmarx 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You are lucky you found out before you were tied down.

[–]NoodleeAppendage 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thats alpha as fuck of you bro. Its so hard to just drop someone like that, even if you know its the right decision. Props to you.

[–]Denali_Laniakea 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Just curious. How did she rationalize the texts?

[–]1TimmyTurnersNuts 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Bro, none of these hoes are loyal. Even the loyal ones ain't loyal. Never talk to her again. Smash you goals, improve you and fuck hoes. That's it. LTR in this day and age is useless and no one can tell me otherwise. Welcome aboard brother.

[–]KatanaRunner 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Took some balls to walk out of a 3 year relationship.


[–]FeelingFine09 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Get back into the Gym 3-4x a week.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Haha I remember when I found messages from my ex between her and her ex-bf. I confronted her...she swore up and down that it was innocent...That she was just toying with him. Within weeks of breaking up with her she was banging him. Hahahaha AWALT!

[–]0kool74 7 points8 points  (0 children)

but needless to say I said "we're done" and walked out right there. She's been trying to call me and knock on my door and shit, but I'm just keeping up no contact.

This right here is so So SO critical for redpill men who come to the pill from either ambushed realization or sensing something isn't quite "right in the force." Having vested yourself in an LTR of any significant time period, it is very difficult to completely cut ALL strings and ALL ties with a subversive harlot and allow them to play you. BUT YOU MUST DO THAT!!!!!!!!!!!

[–]bluedrygrass 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Another guy saved. That is nice!

[–]DntPnicIGotThis 2 points3 points  (0 children)

While I do believe in AWALT I also believe that women can rise above or slide backward into these habits. It sounds like you two are in college in which case you really can't be all that surprised.

[–]Well_Rounded_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Congrats, homie! You rock

Enjoy your newfound abundance

[–]moontripper1246 2 points3 points  (0 children)

damn dude. must've been hard. Props

[–]sintrixxxx 2 points3 points  (0 children)

let her make it up to you with the craziest kinky sex ever. then bounce when you get bored. that's what i always do X'D. On another note, you know how men fuck around and talk about wanting to bang some hot chick. Women are the same way, they just hide it better. Also it's easier for them to actually act on it without investing a lot of time, so it's harder to catch them. But no worries man, learn to love yourself and live for yourself. And dont stress it.

[–]cashmoney_x 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Humans aren't monogamous and this is why relationships are fucking stupid. If you can't be with someone who wants to fuck someone else you can't be with anybody.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Big difference between having those impulses and keeping them private and parading them around to your friends.

[–]JFMX1996 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Despite all the congratulations,

I know it isn't easy, probably a lot of heartache right now.

It's pretty shitty to know and I hope you do find a lot of fulfillment. Fulfillment never comes from another person, it comes from working on yourself and having adventures in life.

I wish you the best of luck in getting some, but even more luck in building up a happy, healthy life, my friend.

Take care!

[–]THEDICKDEALER 1 point2 points  (0 children)

OP you are a real ass dude. Always remember it's not what cums out of her mouth just how you come in her mouth.

[–]bottlesandcutlery 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So you've dumped a loyal girlfriend of three years because she joked about fucking another guy with her friends. Have you never fantasied about fucking another woman and joked about it with your male friends? You have a woman who still wants you back after you invaded her privacy by reading her messages. Imagine how you would feel if your ex did that to you. I really hope for her sake you don't take her back.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Next time keep your mouth shut. Its cathartic, but the whole point is not tipping your hand.

Next time, fuck and then ghost, downgrade to plate

[–]Choice77777 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So after 3 years of dating she's texting her girlfriends that she'd like to fuck some other guy ?

[–]Eluzion 1 point2 points  (7 children)

Excuse my ignorance but. AWALT? All women ... and i can't work out the rest.

[–]seehoon 1 point2 points  (1 child)

All women are like that AWALT

[–]beginner_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well done.

However not confronting her would have been even better. It breaks your frame. Just break-up with some bullshit excuse. Confronting her and all the drama just helps her for closure plus will make her more careful in the future.

[–]belsnickel222 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Let's have a little alternate thought point here. You've never texted your buddies saying you'd like to fuck someone else? You probably no intentions of acting upon it can you honestly say you've never done that?

[–]deville05 0 points1 point  (8 children)

Hmm.. Just to be the devil's advocate.. should private conversations between her and her friends be something you should be privy of? I mean the only reason we can spy now is because this technology exists. You can't wipe thoughts away. I'm sure you talk about fucking other women with your buddies.

Also it is also true that many women are oblivious to what flirting is. They don't learn it like we do.

Nevertheless your happiness matters and if you feel you can't trust someone then it's your call.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Surely her wanting to bang her group mate wouldn't be enough alone to make me want to break it off alone. There have been other things leading me to this decision.

In any case, about whether or not reading your SO's messages is moral: I don't really care. After this I don't plan on getting into another relationship for quite some time, so I see no reason why an issue like this would bother me again.

[–]muh_posts 4 points5 points  (1 child)

You don't see the difference?

When you look at a hot girl, maybe even a new colleague and joke about her to your friends, it's different from a moderately attractive woman who has the power to absolutely make things happen on a timescale she chooses.

Also, men and women are different. Men have an inherent lust for strange. Women, when they get that lust while in a relationship, are just looking for a branch they can swing to because they're read to jump, just looking for an opportunity.

[–]deville05 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I disagree on the second part. Modern society now brainwashes women into lusting..like its natural and okay to do and there is nothing to it. I think modern sexual programming confuses the fuck out of both men and women especially if you aren't aware of the pill

[–]MTG_Leviathan 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Bit of a difference between some banter between your mates, and actively flirting and hanging out with someone when you're with someone, if OP confronted her about the study group and she said no, then she broke a boundary and you should either exit stage left of dread game. Obviously doing this for every man in her life is silly, but for men who openly flirt with her (And thus actively trying to cuck you.) they are only a threat if you let them be.

Op shoulda put his foot down and walk if she didn't bite, not wait for months, even catching her alone with this guy on webcam with her hiding it and listening to BS excuses as he admits in his other posts.

TlDR: OP has been beta-ing the fuck for months, admits it in other posts, finally wises up and leaves, which is better late than never.

[–]deville05 0 points1 point  (1 child)

On one hand I agree. On the other.. Women every guy try to flirt? Your relationship isn't his problem. From. A pro to a beginner, every man who is aware is gonna try to flirt. How do you expect to avoid that or women to avoid that? OK maybe killing the flirty vibe by not reciprocating flirty talk is a way..

[–]MTG_Leviathan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not every guy who tries to flirt as long as they set clear boundaries and tell them to fuck off if they're persistent. It's not about avoiding it, it's about not encouraging it when you have a boyfriend.

[–]Lsegundo 1 point2 points  (1 child)

where is all the BP Horse shit coming from at the bottom of this thread?

Spinning the issue from OP gf acting like a ho into him snooping is a female trick when they get caught.

[–]deville05 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not convincing him and I'm not saying that she is victim. Just questioning everything.. Thinking alternatively. At the end of the day it's about trust and I'd that gone for whatever thinking, without or without good reason, its as good as over

[–]nyuuji points points [recovered]

So are we supposed to never trust our LTRs?

[–]VancouverSucks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What do you think awalt means?

[–]AwakeningLion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

she tried to rationalize it in some absurd ways

I'd like to know more. What kind of bullshit did her hamster come up with?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did she say she was trying to fuck him or that he was really haawwt? This clarification is very important. What did you consider "flirting?"

I'm not trying to knock you, just trying to understand the full picture.

I see a lot of people jumping the gun here. Would you think you deserved to be broken up with simply because in a male only group chat you said this chick in your study group is smoking hot? Nah. Now if you were detailing how you were trying to get with her, than yeah. So details matter here.

Just because your dating a chick does that make all good looking dudes invisible.

[–]textualintercourse 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I [39M] have my GF (25F) of 1.5 years and I'm having a blast, but an under zero illisions that as soon as she doesn't "feel" how we used to be that she'll bail in a NY minute.

[–]1ozaku7 0 points1 point  (0 children)

AWALT, yes and yes, but I do the same with my friends. We talk about who we would bang, we also write with chicks, but not necessarily that I really want them in my bed. It's just a fantasyfuck and that's that. In some cases I would tease my girlfriend by telling her that I would fuck some colleageu of mine.

In other words, good luck finding a woman that doesn't do this crap. You are expecting a woman to be only sexual towards you and find noone else on earth attractive.

[–]DarkRenaissance 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Glad to see a positive story among all the cuckold horror shows. Sidebar, lifting, I'm sure you'll be going through them now. Good luck.

[–]Temptationn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This right here is why I'm the female in that scenario. Even in LTR's never settle for 1 pussy. I still act like I'm single, got a few plates, still go to clubs, etc. It really helps and if a situation like this ever happens all you gotta do is leave and text one of the girls on standby. Yes it's immoral but if they're always playing the game you mine aswell beat them to it. Best of luck, though sounds like you're on the right track. Been in that situation before which lead me to be like this.

[–]Kinote_42 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"She tried to rationalize it in some absurd way" I want to punch a hole through my computer screen just thinking about the shitty train of logic she used to justify her actions.

[–]ecosci 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She will cheat or get bored 2-5yrs in been saying this for a while always keep options.

[–]MAGAorGTFO 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Had The exact same thing happen to me, ended up getting back together with her. Just to have her say she was going to visit one of her guy friends for a weekend on her way back from vacation. I finally found TRP and I ghosted her. Got rid of the blue pill after 3 years of bs.

[–]Frenetic_Zetetic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

“It is not what you don’t know that gets you in trouble. It’s what you know… that really isn’t so...”.


[–]analand points points [recovered]

Kind of bullshit, or lacking context. Men say this stuff all the time ("Man, I'd bang her" etc.). This is most likely no different. But as I said, I might be missing some more context.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (1 child)

Well the guy she was talking about wanting to bang has flirted with her before, and we had an ordeal recently about how in spite of this she continues to study in a study group with him. I wouldn't give a shit if she wanted to bang some random dude in her class. But I would definitely be concerned if said guy she frequently studied with, and whom I have caught flirting with her before.

Some other things too, but I don't see the need to get into it.

[–]IV-IVm-I 0 points1 point  (0 children)

lay the other things out, man. What were the other things that became dealbreakers?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If she talks so openly about it, she has no respect for OP anymore. When girl lose respect for her bf, she'll branchswing or fuck another guy sooner or later.

If I'm in LTR I would just say that "she's cute" and not how I would bang the shit out of her infront of my friends.

[–]bobbytrp points points [recovered]

I'll probably get down voted hard for saying this, but from what you've described she actually didn't fuck you over that badly. There are far more brutal ways to discover AWALT.

Should you break up with her? Yeah probably, but you don't have to be a total dick to her. Immediately and permanently ghosting someone that has loved you and been in your life for years is a pretty harsh form of mental abuse. The total no contact route is better served for less serious relationships.

AWALT doesn't mean men should be dicks too. Rise above and be the better man. Tell her why you're not coming back and be firm. If she has been a big part of your life it would be better to end it being more positive and moving forward. Ending it by intentionally causing pain may be justifiable, but it won't make anyone better off in the long run

[–]Dofis 28 points29 points  (13 children)

Not trying to start a debate here, but I'm genuinely curious; why does a woman clearly setting up a money branch to swing to deserve any better than what OP did? By what we can read from his story, he didn't set off some huge argument, he didn't drag her name through the mud. He just said, hey, I saw what you were doing, sorry, it's over. She was about to jump right into the CC on his watch if she hadn't been already, why does she deserve any better than no contact?

Hell, it's even better that he didn't, no chance of getting manipulated back into a relationship on the promise that she'll change.

Guess I just want a clarification here. I was in a very similar situation to OP's, 2yr LTR, things going fine, then bam, "hand me my phone baby" turned into me seeing a notification from her co-worker asking for another pic. Took her back, and 2 months and a trip to Disney land later, I found panties and used condoms on the floor of her room. OP here is simply protecting himself from making the same dumbass mistake that I did: not even giving her a chance to slip back in. His pill swallowing moment, wish I would have sooner.

[–]abc69 1 point2 points  (0 children)

/u/bobbytrd deleted comment was this:

I'll probably get down voted hard for saying this, but from what you've described she actually didn't fuck you over that badly. There are far more brutal ways to discover AWALT.

Should you break up with her? Yeah probably, but you don't have to be a total dick to her. Immediately and permanently ghosting someone that has loved you and been in your life for years is a pretty harsh form of mental abuse. The total no contact route is better served for less serious relationships.

AWALT doesn't mean men should be dicks too. Rise above and be the better man. Tell her why you're not coming back and be firm. If she has been a big part of your life it would be better to end it being more positive and moving forward. Ending it by intentionally causing pain may be justifiable, but it won't make anyone better off in the long run

[–]bobbytrp points points [recovered]

Yeah I guess you're right. She was probably about to start cheating on him if she wasn't already. No contact is fine as long as you provide an explanation in ending a long relationship. I was more arguing against ghosting without telling her why.

I've talked to girls about the concept of ghosting and it can really mess them up. I feel like after sharing something real with a woman you could at least follow up with her as you end it so you don't destroy her trust and ability to function in a future relationship. Completely ghosting someone hurts more than people realize around here and I think it is a concept that is taken too casually.

[–]Lsegundo 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Boo fucking hoo. These hos need to learn how to act properly. OP said she was flirting with the same guy in the past she said she wanted to fuck.

Ghosting to me isn't about hurting her. Its about protecting yourself when she starts trying so spin things and get you to take her back.

[–]AwakeningLion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You're still oozing litres of blue-pill from your pores... What you're essentially saying here is that women are allowed to hurt men – do we need to remind you who fucked who here? – yet men need to cushion their response to said fuckery. In other words, women are less accountable to their actions than we are, which is exactly the agenda that our gynocentric society is pushing. The pussy is on the pedestal.

She knows she fucked up. She knows why he's ghosting her. What else does she need? Flowers and an apology for looking out for oneself and refusing to be fucked over again?

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (5 children)

The thing is is that we had somewhat of an argument less than a month ago about this dude and her, where I was relatively triggered due to him telling her to do sexual things to him, and her being very passive in response rather than telling him to fuckoff. She would reply like "um... What" and things of the like, whilst continuing to converse with him.

About 2 months ago she had been webcamming me when another one of her study group mates had suddenly put his hands on her shoulders (not knowing that she was webcamming) and she immediately closed her laptop. This ordeal I had eventually gotten over too, as she rationalized that this particular group mate was just very touchy and she didn't think I'd be happy with it so it was instinct to try to hide it.

The combination of these recent happenings are the cause of my walking out. One could say that it was the straw that broke the camels back. Sure, I have no solid evidence of her actually cheating on me, but frankly at this point it seems like I would be foolish to trust her. I did explain to her these reasons as to why I do not trust her, and thus why I no longer desire a relationship with her, but she still keeps coming over. I'll be leaving back to school in a few days though, so I should be on the fast track to forgetting about her soon, hopefully.

[–]Arnoux 16 points17 points  (3 children)

one of her study group mates had suddenly put his hands on her shoulders (not knowing that she was webcamming) and she immediately closed her laptop

That is bigger red flag, than what you have mentioned in the post.

[–]MTG_Leviathan -5 points-4 points  (2 children)

Turns out OP is a cuck after all.

[–]Askada 13 points14 points  (1 child)

OP is most likely just a human, not a robot. And swallowing red pill is never instant. I'm quite positive that a lot of guys around here have had mixed feeling about girl from their, lets call it, in-between phase.

[–]MTG_Leviathan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That is a fair assumption, but be open and frank about it to learn from it in a place like this.

[–]Lsegundo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She would reply like "um... What" and things of the like, whilst continuing to converse with him.

This is an absolute fucking deal breaker. It's sad that modern women have no idea how to behave and beta losers let themselves get disrespected.

ne of her study group mates had suddenly put his hands on her shoulders (not knowing that she was webcamming) and she immediately closed her laptop.... Sure, I have no solid evidence of her actually cheating on me...

You do not need absolute proof. Don't buy into the modern BP garbage. A woman in an LTR used to know how to set appropriate boundaries.

I doubt that was the first time the guy put his hands on her shoulders.

[–]zephyrprime 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You over reacted. There are always going to be men that she want's to fuck. Aren't there any women you want to fuck? There are dozens of women I want to fuck right now.

Assert your rules. Don't let her flirt with some guy. If she does, drop her. But just talking with her friends about some guy without actually fucking him is a crime that hasn't happened yet.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yoo... so she told her friends she wanted to bang some dude, and you dumped her for it?

... How many times have you told your friends you wanted to sleep with some woman who you didn't end up sleeping with?

Even when I've decided to be in monogamous relationships for a period of time, I'm always desire-impulsed towards women I want to fuck. Lots of times, I talk to my friends about them, in lieu of actually bending them over.

Was there intent behind her messages or did you just throw away your woman because you're scared of her sexuality?

[–]nilco -3 points-2 points  (1 child)

Honestly brah, and this is out of place for this sub but dont prematurley dump a girl. She said that in a private conversation, not that private matters to me, but it was spoken to her friends and not the guy in question.

Put your foot down and say that shit like that is not ok. If she keeps it up, kick her out. But a thought expressed verbally or in text shouldent be the reason you throw 3 years away. AWALT is true, but ride the wave til it happens.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Disagree. OP should be happy it's "only" 3 years. You could live all your life with this whore who would fuck others on regular basis and you'd never know it. And I've seen tons of men who have no fucking idea what their unicorn gf is doing behind their back. Fuck, I was even one of them. And later, the more women you meet , the clearer you see more of the same shit over and over again.

Women are masters in covering their cheating advantures. If she talks so openly to her friends about fucking some other dude, she would do it sooner or later or she probably has already done it.

Have some self-respect, spin plates and don't go into a relationship until you master the game and your life. Just my opinion.

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