Here are my actual notes; they're not edited for superior legibility. I want to give as accurate an idea of what all she said as I can.
[Name] says women go through a break-up process to get over men
- Selective memory. [Name at least, is aware of this. She says women will play up the bad parts of the relationship, try to forget the good stuff, use the horns effect to take the place of the halo effect, and decide after the fact that their boyfriend was an asshole.
It also helps to talk to others about how bad the ex is.
- Women re-establish/play up their value by getting validation from other men, showing themselves that they are attractive,
- Get revenge, even in very specific ways, not just getting hot. [name] says she wants to read [several things I've been wanting her to read learn Spanish, and...something else along with just improving her body.
- She says women need to frame improvements in a way that they don't acknowledge that the reason she needs to improve is because she has flaws. She says that the re-framing need not be impressive, any flimsy excuse will do with only a hint of plausible deniability. She says "It's so easy" in reference to not thinking very hard about the self-deception to see through it.
Her go-to idea is reframing "I need to lose weight" not as "because I'm fat" but to "get revenge on the ex." Then just not think too hard about it. Again, "It's so easy," as she says.
Then she said:
"All men are like 'I'm going to find a woman who's perfect in every way, and who's not manipulative, and 'loves me for who I am' and then three years later, you know what? You're going to find out, she's manipulative, too.'" - all of this in a mocking high-pitched voice, while making stupid-looking body language."