Field ReportFR: "I didn't want to feel like I missed out" - A story on why AWALT is true. (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by throwitdownman

This happened yesterday, and this post is targeted to those who feel bad for damaging/hurting/breaking up with their LTR/Plates accompanied by a side message to trust your instincts.

It's after work on a weekday, and I'm off to meet my bros for dinner. We are in a restaurant, enjoying good food and good company. Nature calls, and I go to the restroom. The toilets are located outside the restaurant. I see a pretty doll (21Y/O petite brunette with long hair) who seemed lost, and I thought "fuck it" and approached, pretending to also be lost searching for the toilet. We will call her Kate. We chat, I escalate, and before leaving I tell her "I'm going out later, come and meet me after". Exchanged numbers, and went to the restroom. I ended up meeting Kate after, and we fucked the same night.

It felt kind of like a fluke lay, so I talk to Kate. She tells me she 'technically has a boyfriend but is disappointed in him'. Let's call the boyfriend Charlie. At this point I'm confused, because girls have a funny way of disguising what they really mean. She tells me how much she hates being blamed for something she did not do, and her boyfriend did this to her. I prod, and she shows me their texts. Keep in mind they have been dating for two years, and in her phone it showed she deleted his contact.

Turns out she was out with friends for dinner yesterday (yes, the day before meeting me) and the area she was at didn't have cellular connection. Probably an underground area. Charlie properly soft-nexts her, and ignored her for the whole night into the next day. Kate showed me her chat log, and she called him multiple times with long text messages half-hearted apologies arguing her point. Kate told me she cried multiple times. Charlie ignored it all while canceling their planned date to hang with his friends.

This is where the trickle truth comes, and what most don't see. Kate tells me how seeing Charlie make plans with his friends made her feel like 'she was missing out'. She told me she was emotional, became selfish and wanted to 'beat' Charlie (probably by sleeping with me). I told Kate 'I thought people in an LTR were playing for the same team', Kate stays quiet. I ask Kate if she told Charlie ahead of time she might be in an area with poor connection - she ignores the question and continues telling me how she is disappointed in him that he didn't trust her. I ask her if she felt she did anything wrong - she thinks she is the reasonable one. Keep in mind this is after we had sex multiple times while she was technically in a LTR. Here comes the best part - right before she leaves we look at her phone and see a multiple missed calls from Charlie. It was at this point I feel Charlie's instincts told him something was not right. I wink and slap her butt, and she says she'll be back for more.

I already know what is going to happen. Kate and Charlie will talk, they will have an emotionally charged conversation, Kate will stop talking to me, and the two of them will attempt to work things out between themselves. They will go on to have great sex, truly enjoy each other's company and create good memories as they both look like fun people. This is the scary part of dating - women are able to go from extreme love, to extreme despair, into CC mode, and back to loving within a day. As a man it is hard to relate, but it is what it is.

I have no doubt she behaves like Charlie's unicorn when she is with him but when they are apart, she is just Kate - a girl who likes smiling, laughing and traveling. Women truly are horny emotional creatures who act based on impulses and feelz.

TL;DR Here is the timeline summary. Tuesday night Kate dinners with friends, Charlie can't reach her, Kate apologies insincerely, Charlie nexts. Wednesday morning: no contact between Charlie and Kate. Wednesday night: I meet and bang Kate. Charlie messages her, none wiser.

AWALT - there is no fairy-tale love. Women can hamster and feel they truly 'love' a man while still sleeping with another. You will not 'damage' her, you will not 'alpha widow' her to the extent she will be unable to function. She will be able to love eventually, and she will be able to fuck almost immediately.

[–]1-drukpa-kunley- 344 points345 points  (20 children)

Love a man while sleeping with another.

Sorry but no. Love is not part of this equation. Extracting value is.

Here, let me fix that for you: Women can use one man for comfort and use a different man for cock, and be able to reconcile their behavior by spinning that hamster wheel.

Women use men for cock, comfort or cash. And in today's world, they rarely come from the same man.

Edit: Now what will really fuck with your head, is were you the cock or the comfort?

[–]throwitdownman[S] 83 points84 points  (6 children)

I could've been more clear - I should have added quotation marks so it read: 'Love' a man while sleeping with another - since edited it. I certainly agree love is not part of the equation. It was meant to be ironic, it doesn't make sense as how can you love someone when sleeping with another behind his back. Well, it only makes sense in a hamster's mind.

[–]1-drukpa-kunley- 40 points41 points  (3 children)

Thanks for the clarification.

To be absolutely clear for the newbies here, this is the frustration men feel in the Anger phase. We've all been lied to.

When we reach the Acceptance phase, this is yet another example of women exhibiting their true nature. It's like saying, "I was holding this scorpion in my hand and it stung me!". Of course it did. The scorpion was acting like all scorpions do.

Also as an exercise left to the reader, try to see how u/throwitdownman was the comfort and not the cock. Did he throw a jizz rag in her face and send her out the door, or did they have some sort of meaningful conversation after?

[–]electricspresident 42 points43 points  (0 children)

Doesn't matter, got laid, on to the next one

[–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Depends on what he was looking for out of the interation. If he wants to keep her around for longer than a ONS then he will have to sacrifice some pure cock for comfort. It is all in finding a balance. Pure Alpha is good in many ways, but damn if a regular aint nice--SO LONG AS YOU ARE BEYOND SEEING WOMEN AS TERRIBLE PEOPLE for doing what they do, and CAN STILL NEXT HER ASS if she steps out of line at any point in time. Enjoy her company...never rely on it.

[–]buddhadarko 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Exactly. Only hamstering can foster a "reason" for her being spread eagle with a guy she just met. It's never THE truth, it's HER truth.

[–]Htowngetdown 47 points48 points  (5 children)

This chick in an LTR who I’m hooking up with doesn’t kiss me and only wants to be taken from behind roughly. I guess I don’t have to worry about being the comfort

[–]BonelessSkinless 29 points30 points  (4 children)

I don't understand women. Then go get taken from behind roughly by your bf lol fuck

[–]Htowngetdown 33 points34 points  (0 children)

To be fair, distance is a factor. But the lesson here is to never agree to a long distance relationship of any kind. She’s been dating this guy for 4-5 years but has no issues inviting me over to chill and hook up. AWALT

[–]2littleblacktruck 18 points19 points  (2 children)

The boyfriend is probably a "Nice Guy".

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

You're not immune if you're in an ltr.

[–]fastnail 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Its the classic Alpha f*cks, Beta bucks...but which are you?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Damn, this comment right here got me thinking. Sad but this may be true.

[–]pras 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I know what your username means. No really. I do.

[–]fastnail -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Its the classic Alpha f*cks, Beta bucks...but which are you?

[–]buddhadarko 165 points166 points  (17 children)

This happens all over the world and is probably happening right now as I type.

Women run off of feels. It's only after they satiate the desire their feels gives them that they start to hamster and rationalize their behavior in order to abscond from feeling bad or looking bad in the eyes of others. It's comical to watch them come up with reasons for why they deliberately opened their legs for another guy whilst in a relationship with another one. It always comes down to how they feel. This is why the blog Illimitable Men says that loyalty is not an innate characteristic of women. They don't understand it because it requires something of a higher caliber. They operate on subconscious/emotion/low levels of vibrations that keep them in search of something that tickles them just right, and even then they are peeking at another guy who might have a little bit more of something than the guy that's currently plowing them and buying them shit.

You can't be caught slipping with these women. Don't ever, ever be misguided or fooled by their unicorn/perfect girlfriend/wife/'I never suck dick or fuck on the first date' act. Many women will suck and fuck to get back at another guy and neither guy will know the difference (except in OP's case because he had a conversation with her and found out). They put that act on because it serves them, not necessarily because it's what you want. Acting chaste and respectable keeps them in society's good graces, or else they'd be labeled as a slut and would have their fantasy world turned upside down and they wouldn't want that. Women may lack innate logic and reason, but they are smart enough to know how to play the game in a way that benefits them. It doesn't matter how she's behaved before - she WILL fuck another guy if she feels that's the best thing for her to do, she WILL lie to you and tell you she's out with friends but is really bent over a guy's couch getting piped deep, she WILL talk to guys behind your back because they say sweet things to her and give her attention that you might not give her, she WILL do what she has to do to get her needs met be it manipulate you into giving her money, flirt with other guys so they give her money, fuck other guys so they give her money and attention - it doesn't really matter which one of these she does...the point is that without understanding their innate qualities, their Machiavellian traits and capabilities - you as a man WILL be blindsided, cucked, bankrupted, ALL of the above.

Stay awake my friends. This is just another example of how females really are.

[–]alphamystic 57 points58 points  (7 children)

bitter pill to swallow indeed

[–]HoneySquash -1 points0 points  (6 children)

Fuck, I don't want to believe that every woman is like this. The traits he listed are of a horrible human being. I'm quite aware of redpill tendencies, but not every single woman can be such a shitty person.

[–][deleted] 24 points25 points  (1 child)

Read more sidebar my man. And get angry!! It is good! BUT WOMEN ARE NOT HORRIBLE PEOPLE for what they do, any more than you are horrible for wanting a girl to be your own personal slut. They are out for what serves them best, much as you are. It is tough to hear starting out, but then you learn to use this knowlede in a way that best serves you. But, you gotta deal with the blow of the truth, then put in the work to be able to fuck multiple women. When you do that, a woman cheating on you trully don't matter. (Actually, the irony here is that when you CAN fuck multiple women, they tend to not cheat on you and do what you say). Crazy world mane. My newest plate shit tests me all the time, but stil complies. I told her to start working out every day 3 days ago. Guess whos been hitting the gym!

[–][deleted] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Reminds me, I need to start working out again. I quit for a couple days, next thing you know, it's been almost 3 weeks. Probably haven't lost much in that time, though.

[–]juliusstreicher 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Are you kidding??? He listed their VIRTUES! Their bad traits have yet to be listed in this thread.

[–]HoneySquash -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I don't see machiavellian traits as virtues.

[–]netherlanddwarf 35 points36 points  (2 children)

I was at a VIP nightclub event in Miami. I had the best table, the best service and the best crowd. We were celebrating a financial deal that had come through. Later into the night a HB8 brunette 5,1ish sits directly my lap wearing a tight black minidress. We're chatting and I see her put down her phone. Cover pic is her and her dude embracing each other in a park. Hos AIN'T LOYAL!!!!!!

[–]buddhadarko 29 points30 points  (1 child)

Yea and if you didn't pipe her that night, best believe she got piped by someone that night and it wasn't that dude on her cover pic! Why you ask? Because...feels...vagina...her bf didn't text her back fast enough...it was Friday...all of the above.

[–]TerminallyChill94 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Very bitter realization. As a young guy who has been in a LTR during my late teens & early 20s, how can I use this new info to not sabotage the relationship while still being alert to the possibilities?

[–]buddhadarko 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Part of the problem is you trying not to sabotage it. That right there is putting the relationship and her, by default, on a pedestal. You don't have to make an announcement that you're implementing RP principles in your life because your actions will say much more than your words. And, yes, she WILL shit test you, multiple times. This means she's interested in your integrity - Can you handle your shit? Can you protect me? Can you handle me?* That's what she'll be saying and fishing for when you start showing more RP characteristics. The more solid your frame, the more she can be at ease and allow herself to be completely feminine and melt in your arms.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Should have read this years ago.

[–]Luckylancer96 -3 points-2 points  (1 child)

When i look at cheating statics, i wonder. Why they are this low? %60 is too low. More of this rate comes from men so women cheat even less.

[–]theultimatewarriors 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why do you think men cheat more than women? When both are younger (16-25 range), the stats say women cheat more on average from everything I've seen, but maybe it's shifting again.

[–]2Dmva100 91 points92 points  (17 children)

This is why you keep your options in play and never commit. You'll always be the guy who doesn't need to put any effort in and you still get sex. Leave the effort and 'feeding the beast' for the guys who don't know any better. She will still come back. Boomerang game is the way to go.

The more effort you invest, the less incentive she has to reciprocate.

[–]yomo86 57 points58 points  (13 children)

Fun anecdote: One year down after swallowing the RP I had a plate cheating on me to see 'if I care'. This is so out of this world retarded from that moment on I was not able to commit in a factual sense.

[–]buddhadarko 54 points55 points  (0 children)

This is comical.

The fact that women use cheating/fucking guys as a means to get a reaction just shows that sometimes, just a small portion of the time, women know that their only commodity is pussy. Much like rich men of the world throw money around to get things done/get a reaction out of people - women throw their pussy around to make things happen.

If this isn't a manifestation of a hamster being a hamster, but trying to deny it's a hamster...I don't know what is.

[–]oak_water 42 points43 points  (5 children)

My wife cheated on me because she convinced herself I didn't care, then was shocked when I reacted negatively.

[–]Endorsed ContributorAuvergnat 32 points33 points  (3 children)

Only if by "convinced herself" you meant "rationalized to herself".

She cheated on you because she felt sexually aroused by that guy on that moment, and rationalized some pseudo-reason to justify yielding to her feelings of sexual urgency. Sure that rationalization was retarded, but that is a rationalization nonetheless.

then was shocked when I reacted negatively

This is the interesting part. Rationalizations are so powerful she did end up fully believing you'd think it is ok. It's crazy to think you cannot doubt her surprise, because the hamster had done such a great job

[–]buddhadarko 9 points10 points  (1 child)

Her truth is seen by her as THE truth.

It's a scary thing if you think of it. Someone can be that deluded that they are literally fabricating things in their mind and then using those creations as truth. It's also made easier by society since it's laced with feministic ideologies to brainwash everyone into seeing women as equal but better no matter what.

[–]oak_water 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've deluded myself too, so AMALT as much as AWALT. The difference is men are much more capable of looking within themselves and finding the answers to their vexations.

[–]oak_water 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was surprised and not. I hadn't realized I still had her on a pedestal. She's a good woman, feminine, loves my leadership for the most part, cooks, cleans, homeschools, responds mostly positively to my advances. But yes, she did rationalize, and yes, I was caught off guard. I've implemented changes in my life because they were right for me, not because of any hard knocks (except those I caused myself). I hadn't experienced hypergamy yet. But this drove it all home.

[–]searcher612 9 points10 points  (2 children)

How does a plate cheat on you (serious question?). She is a plate not LTR - how is she cheating?

[–]yomo86 4 points5 points  (1 child)

In like we were together, albeit me stating explicitly the opposite from the get go.

[–]searcher612 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You were together, with a plate?

Or you are saying she stated you were together but you never said you were?

In any case, unless it's a clear LTR with some kind of commitment (Read not a plate), not sure how anything else can be considered cheating. I think it's obvious MANY plates do the same that is done to them - that's part of why they accept it (they also have plates).

[–]nehardElhidine 63 points64 points  (2 children)

This my man. One hundred percent truth. Whenever I explain that shit to any of my friends I get labeled as SEXIST and shallow person 😂

[–]buddhadarko 43 points44 points  (1 child)

That's because they don't want to face the TRUTH. A lot of guys claim they know about women, but they just copy some bullshit version of an alpha douche from a tv show or movie and they think it actually works because they've gotten some laughs and some attention from females. But, these are the same guys who get into LTRs or even have ONS' and they obsess over the girl because she gave it up to him and he lives in scarcity.

That is why when they hear real, concrete RP stuff, they push it away. They'd rather live in the soft arms of fantasy where they can kiss her ass and she won't fuck Chad.

[–]2Dmva100 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Well said and that's why the betas using PUA get such a bad rap and suck with women after the first lay or two.

Rollo highlighted it perfectly in Burden of Performance chapter of his book.

[–]Mellyanish 1 points1 points [recovered]

Perfect lol

She cheats on him to punish him for not trusting her!!!

I wonder why he didn't trust her?

[–]theultimatewarriors 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you've ever talked to a girl who cheated in a scenario like that, they'll say the same things. It's the guys fault she cheated because he already was saying she was untrustworthy and it led to fights so she might as well prove him right.

The other scenario is doing some crazy stuff that is definitely not putting the relationship first (aka, getting ready to branch swing), and then saying the guy was being controlling for ___________ (insert concern about relationship ending and calling the woman out which obviously leads to a fight which means obviously the girl was right to leave). It's essentially starting a fight and then using the fight as proof that the guy made her do it. The word used is "gas lighting", but there are so many other common scenarios that fall under gas slighting that it's somewhat ambiguous and people who gas light don't use the term themselves. Just go head to any subreddit that talks about cheating and read around and you'll see the same scenarios pop up for those who were cheated on, but you'll see a variety of reasons for doing it from the cheaters, but they'll use the same scenario in order to make themselves ok with it (I.e. They knew they're going to do it, but waited for a scenario where it was more acceptable to do it or on the flip side are in a scenario where the emotions got out of control and they later regret it but need a reason to blame the other person so they can move on and not confront their own emotions about it).

The absolute most mind blowing part though is that even if they got called out, and even if they messed things up, and even if they were absolutely horrible to other people and completely selfish, they still will just write it off as being really selfish for a period of time or figuring things out and that NOW they suddenly know better because of their mistakes. It's like if someone had burned down two houses already and said now they understand why they were wrong and learned from it and that's why you should let them live with you, or if someone was a partner at a business and stole from the other person twice but thinks they've learned from it so you should make them partner of your business... It's absolutely crazy. At the end of the day the emotions are all that mattered, and the reasoning for those emotions comes second. If you ever get the chance, if a woman has explained that she's cheated before at some point toss the phrase out there "once a cheater, always a cheater" and watch the mental gymnastics take place. Obviously don't say that's what you think, just ask her what she thinks about the phrase, because what she says is the actual things she's telling herself.

Also, women are much better at hiding it because once the emotions change, so does she (why a lot of women will cheat while traveling or if they have a group of friends that goes out for "girls night", those emotions aren't there in the morning after she cheated and others in the group did the same thing). Women are much better at not letting it even effect them because after the emotions are gone, it really doesn't come in to play. That's why bringing up the emotions of regret is viewed as so bad today. Slut shaming isn't even about sex any more, it's any time you make a woman confront her conscience, which is a word that's essentially disappeared.

[–]saladon 1 points1 points [recovered]

Damn. Charlie doesn't sound like a total beta at all, but it looks like his soft-nexting techniques only succeeded in making her cheat to save her own ego.

[–]2comment 1 points1 points [recovered]

In the end, she was bound to cheat anyway. You can use tactics to try to win daily battles, but it's not a substitute for strategy to win the war.

It's like pinball. New players can suck and lose the ball 3 seconds after it comes out or an amazing one that can a single play going for 15 minutes... but in the end the tilt of the table ensures the ball will eventually drop between the paddles all the same.

All women have some angle of tilt, I suspect this one was a little steeper than average.

[–]STL-UPS-DRIVER 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's a matter of time with all of them. Never commit.

[–]bouncypoo 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Yeah seems like a rough card he was dealt, as he in my opinion did what was right by soft nexting, and not giving her attention. She acted in an overzealous manner but such is the way of a sloot. He went wrong with the multiple calls afterwards of course.

[–]petersen2massive 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The fact is, in an LTR, when you start nexting, you need to be honest with yourself and accept that there are probably a few more fucks left in the relationship before it all goes to shit. The end is nigh when you start nexting in an LTR. Charlie better start making moves to end the relationship

[–]foggydew42 49 points50 points  (4 children)

Most likely not the first time she cheated on him. A girl that truly respected her LTR would be doing anything she could to get back in his good graces. Her relationship with Charlie wasn't built off respect and I'm guessing she has already been fucking other guys and he sensed it.

[–]throwitdownman[S] 31 points32 points  (3 children)

The funny thing is, and I've left it out in the FR, was that she was planning on baking snacks for her BF as an apology. If she hadn't bumped into me she had planned on going grocery shopping.

[–]foggydew42 42 points43 points  (2 children)

This behavior isn't too surprising. I know a girl that is lazy as can be but when she finds a sign a guy will be successful in the future she acts all conservative and cooks for him and tries to act like a housewife. On the side she is out fucking other guys. The girl has said things like she "just wants to get married and be a housewife for a rich guy" hundreds of times. What she really means is she wants to sit on the couch and get fat while her rich husband provides her with nice things for the rest of her life just like her mom.

She was most likely using the whole baking thing as a manipulation rather than cooking for him out of respect.

[–]aDrunkenWhaler 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Women do not understand the concept of respect. It is not a part of their evolution. Manipulation on the other hand...

[–]juliman17 4 points5 points  (0 children)

you just described my ex.

extra kudos for gifts and ego stroking... fuck man

[–]2 Senior Endorsed Contributorvengefully_yours 68 points69 points  (8 children)

When you're doing a girl doggy while she texts her boyfriend how much she loves him, or when you're still sweaty after fucking every hole she has and she answers his call and talks like nothing happened, and this happens with most girls you fuck...

You don't even need to ponder it.

[–]Frich3 7 points8 points  (1 child)

have you been in a situation like this before? obviously not on the receiving end.. I feel like I've made a few girls cheat on their dudes but I never even knew they were in a relationship, therefore I can't really feel bad about it.

[–]mishasam89 0 points1 point  (5 children)

dude, how often does this happen?

[–]aDrunkenWhaler 20 points21 points  (4 children)

From experience, the ones in LTR are the easiest to bang. Most of the girls I've fucked had a boyfriend or were married. One was 4 months pregnant. One was newly married, sucking me off on lunch breaks. One just bought a house with her husband. AWALT. And to answer your question, this happens a lot because almost all women will cheat at some point. Loyalty is dead gone.

[–]mishasam89 6 points7 points  (3 children)

sadly, i understand..

I just have one question though. Do you start to resent them for being like that?

I have this problem. When i don't like someone for who they are, i don't want to be near them anymore; even for sex.

I don't know why. When i was a teenager this wasn't so, but after 25 or so my attraction has changed.. Can you explain this?

[–]aDrunkenWhaler 8 points9 points  (2 children)

It's a love-hate relationship. Generally, I resent how stupid and irrational they are, but they are fun and I highly enjoy their company. Similar to a dog, I don't get angry for him barking or chasing his tail.

If I don't like who they are, I leave and that is it. I don't tolerate some things that I didn't mind before, and don't mind things that used to bother me. We all have our own value system that changes with experience and knowledge.

[–]mishasam89 6 points7 points  (1 child)

dude i unfortunately believe you, but it is so fucking soul crushing.

how old were you when you found all of this out? I'm 28 and the "Truth" is really messing with my mind..

[–]aDrunkenWhaler 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Bits and pieces were always there, but it all clicked for me about 3 years ago when I bumped into TRP. I'm in my early 30s, so I was just slighty older than you are now. It will get better, don't worry. Start with the sidebar.

[–]Questionnaire7 23 points24 points  (21 children)

What should Charlie have done differently? This seemed unavoidable

[–]askmrcia 47 points48 points  (0 children)

Nothing much, but not ltr her. Sounds like a huge slut to be honest. A chick meeting a guy in a ltr and fuckin said guy on first day? That's slut 101.

I'm guessing Charlie already knew she was a slut and if he didn't, he should have seen some signs.

[–]binarynightmare 10 points11 points  (5 children)

the best thing Charlie or any of us can ever do is accept that infidelity is always a possibility from the start. It sounds like common sense - we all know that cheating happens - but a lot of us that get destroyed or torn apart by it are the ones who never truly internalized the possibility that it could actually happen to us.

[–]Questionnaire7 4 points5 points  (3 children)

Yea I see that. Ive been here over a year. But all that happened was she was in an area with bad cell reception, op mentions no effort of Charlies to get in touch with her only her calls and long apologizing txts. This story is missing a lot of information. What was she appoliging for? Why would charlie ignore an apology for nothing?

[–]binarynightmare 1 point2 points  (0 children)

there probably are details missing, but if you think about it, there's not a whole lot that charlie could have done that deserves that level of retaliation.

[–]throwitdownman[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Good point, I didn’t think it was important enough to include so I’ll type it here. Plus you asked a few times so you probably want an answer.

The two had agreed to keep each other updated. Seems she had a bit too much fun and forgotten about her phone. I don’t think Charlie knew where she was, and was in the dark for a while. The phone did show one missed call from Charlie during the time she had no connection, so he did reach out.

Kate called him after but the call time showed it was short. I mentioned that when I read her apologies, it felt insincere. Probably a combination of these factors made Charlie think - ‘I’m better off not dealing with this person today’.

Seemed like a typical relationship conflict. Nothing Charlie did felt excessively needy.

[–]Questionnaire7 2 points3 points  (0 children)

There it is. You should edit that into the story bro. I did want to know. Im not in an ltr and not looking for one but I want to learn as much as possible.

Trp has a lot of gems in the form of philosophy but the real world stories here are very direct and applicable.

[–]MrAgamemnon -1 points0 points  (0 children)

any of us can ever do is accept that infidelity is always a possibility from the start

Infidelity is not a possibility, infidelity is a certainty. Doesn't matter who you are, what you do, how strong your frame is, it will happen.

She was never yours, it was just your turn.

[–]searcher612 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Not enough details; don't know history and his side. Possibly nothing wrong.

Come on ... this is on her. She's immature and this is not the first time she's done this.

[–]TunedtoPerfection 1 point2 points  (0 children)

never message her again first. Charlie should have just assumed she was going to slut it up, because he made her "mad". Then he should continued on with his life. If she comes crawling back, and he wants to get his dick wet then he can.

Half hearted, "I'm apologizing so that when show this to my friends I don't look like a bad person" types of apologies are a sign of huge disrespect. Only when a woman thinks you have no other options will she pull that shit out. At that point she literally thinks you're under her and she is probably looking to branch swing. Of course she will be using the good old "untrusting/overbearing" excuse. Anytime a girls "last"(read current) boyfriend "became to controlling" that is code for "My current boyfriend bores me and I've been looking to branch swing for a while, He's kinda catching on."

[–]blurtard 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Apparently - cheat also, or not devote himself to an LTR in the first place.

[–]banica24 0 points1 point  (4 children)

she hates being blamed for something she did not do, and her boyfriend did this to her

He shouldn't have blamed whatever he blames her for. Sounds like Charlie is a drama queen, acting beta and needy.

[–]stephcurryftw 7 points8 points  (1 child)

But let's not just assume that she was telling the truth. She could have hamstered all that shit up.

[–]Questionnaire7 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Did I miss something or did the OP not mention what Charlie blamed her for?

[–]netherlanddwarf 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Charlie should have learned a little about TRP

[–]lucasven -2 points-1 points  (1 child)

Not nexted her, or, as soon as she disappeared, he shouldn't let her come back. Being aware of her emotional instability and play her differently.

[–]Questionnaire7 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Op didnt do a good job describing why Charlie nexted her. It sounded like it was just because of cell service.

[–]binarynightmare 14 points15 points  (0 children)

this is a post worthy story. Also, I appreciate your objective/stoic tone in writing - too much 'slut this, slut that' in a lot of recent trp posts that I think derail from a constructive discussion.

[–]cashmoney_x 11 points12 points  (1 child)

"Turns out she was out with friends for dinner yesterday (yes, the day before meeting me) and the area she was at didn't have cellular connection. Probably an underground area. Charlie properly soft-nexts her, and ignored her for the whole night into the next day. Kate showed me her chat log, and she called him multiple times with long text messages half-hearted apologies arguing her point. Kate told me she cried multiple times. Charlie ignored it all while canceling their planned date to hang with his friends. This is where the trickle truth comes, and what most don't see. Kate tells me how seeing Charlie make plans with his friends made her feel like 'she was missing out'. She told me she was emotional, became selfish and wanted to 'beat' Charlie"

All this is why relationships are retarded and now in my past only. All that bullshit nonsense drama.....what a waste of a life.

[–]SovereignSoul76 21 points22 points  (0 children)

"Nuh uh, I'm not it, YOU'RE STILL IT! I was touching the base! Now the chair is the base! I'm still touching the base! Now my shoe is the base, so I'm always on base!"

Same thing: playing games with a grown child who takes zero accountability for any actions. But instead of playing for nothing....you're playing for your entire financial, mental, spiritual, professional, and social well-being.

[–]1empatheticapathetic 10 points11 points  (1 child)

Your post reminded me of when I was 13 and whenever I had arguments with my mom. We weren't having the same argument at all but she just enjoyed bitching. We'd talk about how my brothers behaviour was causing problems in the family business. She would agree wholeheartedly with everything I said. But when I brought the cause of his behaviour down to the way she lets him get away with lack of accountability, she'd look and me and pretend I never said anything and then carry on bitching about him. Then the next day she was at his beck and call regarding every stupid idea he had.

This happened so many times I eventually realised "oh, she is never going to take accountability for herself or my brothers actions and simply enjoys the bitching. Even if they both end up in jail. They're both screwed."

[–]askmrcia 6 points7 points  (2 children)

Ok my takeaway from this is we don't know the extent of their relationship at all. I thought redpill 101 was to not listen to what women say, but watch their actions.

She "told" you they were together, but for all we know they could have been off and on or even fuckbuddies. And maybe she caught more feelings then what Charlie wanted. So its probably one of those complicated situations.

I mean this chick just met you and fucked you within a day. That sounds like she has some mental problems and she's just a huge slut (most likely a combination of the two).

I'm just speaking from experience. I see shit like this often when a woman will say they are in a LTR, but its really a fling or something but she just doesn't want to admit it because she don't want to perceived a certain way.

I'm just saying there is a lot of assumptions on your part and I hate to say this blue pill shit, but most girls aren't going to hookup with some random ass dude they met outside of a restaurant while they are in a LTR for more then two years. I mean c'mon.

I'm in no way calling your field report BS or shitty or anything, but I'm just trying to put some more thought into it.

[–]aDrunkenWhaler 5 points6 points  (0 children)

most girls aren't going to hookup with some random ass dude they met outside of a restaurant while they are in a LTR for more then two years. I mean c'mon.

You should travel more, you'll change your mind very quickly about this.

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Most? Maybe but that still leaves 49% who will act that way given the slightest chance. The problem is all this betting we talk about doesn't id the good girls from the thots.

[–]NobleFarore 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This happens so many times it's not even funny. It's just the AF, BB dynamics at play. This time you got to be the AF and saw first-hand what women will do and how they will rationalize their behavior. You got to experience an incredible lesson, something many men need to experience for themselves.

[–]UGotTrumped 4 points5 points  (2 children)

So basically, don't get in an LTR and develop deep feelings for any girl. Ever.

[–]Fedor_Gavnyukov 5 points6 points  (0 children)

no, just know what you can be exposing yourself to and don't deny yourself pleasure either.

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Exactly! We!come to the red pill.

[–]TheRedPillMonkey 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I feel like this is more a cautionary tale on losing frame and smv. Charlie lost it hard when he beta'd her with the string of needy calls and texts. Then doubled down with putting her on ice. Chances are he lost frame months ago.

So what did she do? What any girl who suddenly lacks a frame to follow does. She latched on to the first frame offered. She didn't have dread, she had no desire to stay with a lower smv guy who couldn't maintain frame in a relationship when she had other options.

I got $1 that you hear from her again within 2 weeks.

Word of warning boys: if she doesn't dread losing your frame, your smv isn't enough to keep your turn much longer. Women go to whoever has the highest smv they can get.

[–]redrummilf 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Women go to whoever has the highest smv they can get."

Which is why you don't LTR in the first place. Your talk of Charlie acting beta is irrelevant. There is always someone out there with a higher SMV than you. You WILL be cheated on at some point.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I simply don't associate with women I want to sleep with who will not sleep with me longer than I have to(work, school).

I call it my zone.

[–]desi_swagger 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Kate sounds exactly like my ex Girlfriend. We broke off, only to get back together after a week. A month later, I came to know she had casual no strings attached sex with an acquintance.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If a girl I am talking to says she has a boyfriend, I pretty much say that has nothing to do with me. That is between me and her, not him. So I personally don't give a shit, aside from the boyfriend comment probably being a shit test anyways.

[–]forwardprog 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The amount of times I have witnessed this near exact scenario first hand, lol. Situations like these are what awakened me to the entire RP idealogy before I even knew about this sub.

Great post.

[–]Bear-With-Bit 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I wonder if back in the cavemen days TRP then would be like "you gotta tie up your females or they gonna run away."

[–]banica24 1 point2 points  (3 children)

The boyfriend served this himself by being a bitch. Here's a warning to LTR folks - if you start pulling this shit your girl can hop on someone elses cock the same night.

Any sign of weakness or jealously and it's over and she will cheat/breakup.

[–]enjoy_life88 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Pretty much why LTRs are nothing but a waste of energy. The energy you must invest in order to keep up the frame constantly, why not invest it in being "someone elses cock the same night" every other night.

[–]searcher612 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How did he show weakness? By not contacting her for one morning / afternoon? What if he also was in an underground area with no cell coverage or similar? He didn't show any weakness until after she hopped on someone else's cock - that's we the OP indicated there were missed calls (after it was all done).

[–]GreatWhoreOfBabylon 1 point2 points  (2 children)

"This happened yesterday, and this post is targeted to those who feel bad for damaging/hurting/breaking up with their LTR/Plates accompanied by a side message to trust your instincts. It's after work on a weekday, and I'm off to meet my bros for dinner. We are in a restaurant, enjoying good food and good company. Nature calls, and I go to the restroom. The toilets are located outside the restaurant. I see a pretty doll (21Y/O petite brunette with long hair) who seemed lost, and I thought "fuck it" and approached, pretending to also be lost searching for the toilet. We will call her Kate. We chat, I escalate, and before leaving I tell her "I'm going out later, come and meet me after". Exchanged numbers, and went to the restroom. I ended up meeting Kate after, and we fucked the same night. It felt kind of like a fluke lay, so I talk to Kate. *She tells me she 'technically has a boyfriend but is disappointed in him'."

*I would've stopped talking to her in this point.

[–]mishasam89 1 point2 points  (1 child)

dude this is the deal w/ me.

When i realize the kind of pig i'm talking to, i don't even want to have sex with them anymore..

Is this normal?

[–]GreatWhoreOfBabylon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes, if you're a person with strong morals or an idealist as I happen to be as well. Nothing to be ashamed of. Nowadays I'm almost an induced asexual and it's ok. Immorality turns me off, most people are demoralized nowadays so this is the reason such behaviors turn off only few of us.

[–]2awalt_cupcake 0 points1 point  (6 children)

Hey OP, I'm curious how did you escalate upon just meeting her? I reserve kino for the first date (if you're not including a prolonged handshake or an excuse to touch her ears or arm like jewelry).

[–]TheRedPillMonkey 3 points4 points  (5 children)

I reserve kino for the first date

His first date was later that night. There was something I read on here a while ago on how to score on the first date, and it involved making it seem like the third date. Move venues and activities twice so it seems like 3 seperate dates.

In his case, he got her digits at dinner. Date 1 was later that night where they 'met up'. My guess is that's where kino happened.

[–]2awalt_cupcake 0 points1 point  (4 children)

this would make a lot of sense

[–]throwitdownman[S] 0 points1 point  (3 children)

Indeed, I was quite aggressive in trying to obtain a same night meet. That was probably the hardest part, after that is just kino, escalation and sorting logistics.

[–]2awalt_cupcake 1 point2 points  (2 children)

how do you be aggressive without seeming desperate? I've tried to push to same-night or next-day date for day game. but it never works so I just take my time to arrange something and if it works then cool. If not whatever.

[–]throwitdownman[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

It helps to talk a lot to get her to loosen up. If you barely say anything and the third sentence is: 'Let's meet later' it may come off desperate in any setting besides a club/bar/crowded noisy area.

[–]2awalt_cupcake 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For sure. I day game because I'm on the go. On average I probs do 5-10 min of talking. This last girl I met at a coffee shop and spent more time maybe 15-20 min talking to her on her break. I usually wrap it up with 'when do you get off? (...) let me get your number and we'll go out and do something'

[–]moontripper1246 0 points1 point  (2 children)

But is she wrong for doing this? Genuine question here. Gathering everyones opinions. Is she wrong for going out, getting gamed by you and fucking you?

Would you be wrong for doing the same?

Not trying to get people to be like "oh sympathy for the girlllll", genuinely trying to find a moral line. Similar situation happened to me the other weekend, roles reversed. I'm at a festival, get multiple opportunities to sleep with multiple beautiful women, but don't because of the existence of an SO. Feel......conflicted. Opinions and perspectives much appreciated. Might make a post about it soon.

[–]Fedor_Gavnyukov 0 points1 point  (0 children)

depends if you believe fucking other people is wrong while you're in supposedly committed relationship. shit like op's post happens on the daily with both sexes. yes, women do this shit, but so do guys. all day long.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Definitely something I don't already know.

Thanks for sharing, though; it's a goid reminder of female nature.

[–]Tzeentch_Gnosis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So you don't believe in alpha widow. I know women heal completely from relationships unlike men. I saw a study. Somewhere...

But say, she's dated Brad Pitt can she date the hot dog stand guy she did before? Is what I think alpha widow is. Unless we are talking the effects of CC. Then her greater more, naive love is found closer to the source.

[–]uebermacht 0 points1 point  (0 children)

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is true as fuck, I had a girl practically begging me to fuck her (coworker so I didn't), she had a boyfriend who I didnt know about because she never mentioned him. Turns out her boyfriend was away at basic training, and as soon as he came back she was all of a sudden normal.

[–]wastelandchic 0 points1 point  (6 children)

Almost guarantee she's a borderline (BPD) psycho. Cannot simply be by herself to save her life.....

[–]IDisagreeHere 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My ex was BPD and this post is very very much in line with her behavior. I've heard the "I didn't want to feel like I missed out" firsthand. This is not like me or you wanting to go out on a Friday with some buds because you don't want to miss a good time. This is straight pathological compulsion to "equal" another. I have the most fucked up stories about how this compulsion plays out in real life.

[–]Fedor_Gavnyukov 0 points1 point  (4 children)

thats like 40% of women from my experience

[–]wastelandchic 0 points1 point  (3 children)

To varying degrees you're exactly right. Even the ones who are not clinically diagnosable exhibit strong traits. Guys always underestimate how many of these crazy bitches are out there....

[–]Fedor_Gavnyukov 1 point2 points  (2 children)

i wouldn't even say they're crazy, that's just how they are. they constantly seek attention, its their nature. i know girls that have never been single ever since their first relationship. its like chain LTR mode. no break, nothing. pretty crazy, but i guess whatever makes them happy. some are just scared of being alone for one reason or another. personally, that's a huge red flag for me, but it is what it is.

[–]wastelandchic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As someone just coming out of a BPD LTR, I'm seeing "dead people everywhere". Having said that, I'm also woke to their deviancy and its prevalence. Roughly 10% of women are borderlines, no question, and the ones that aren't demonstrate strong traits.

[–]wastelandchic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And if you've ever tied into one, you'll both long for their deviant ways but mostly run for your life. This bitch OP describes is quintessentially BPD, no question.

[–]LordThunderbolt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The point I take away from this is that soft nexting or ignoring your LTR is a great way to fuel her hamster to cheat on you. I don't even understand why people woupd get in LTRs in 2017. Logically and technologically it doesn't add up

[–]theultimatewarriors 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"The only loyal bitches are covered in fur."

[–]NonrepresentativePoe -1 points0 points  (1 child)

Girls do cheat sure but this sounds like your fantasy, dude lmao

[–]playingpants 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Nah I believe him 100%. Shit really goes down like this. Youre fucking a girl and she bitches to you about her man. And theyre always getting called/text from their bfs in inopportune moments.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not to be a Dick but placing a hoe before a bro is a major party foul. TBH if I were her Bf and I found out you wouldn't disappear, she would.

[–]Riktenkay -1 points0 points  (1 child)

Sometimes I feel like I'm more of a girl than a guy. Just the way my mind works. I'd probably act exactly like this given the chance.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

What, end up riding a huge black cock while wearing panties?