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Red Pill TheoryThings You Should NEVER Say To A Woman (Red Pill Edition) (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by [deleted]

TL, DR : No white-knighting, no "chivalry", no romantic platitudes or relationshippy stuff

You've probably already encountered such lists on men's blogs and magazines. They keep shoving Blue Pill bullshit down men's throats and try to present it as some kind of relationship advice. The rationale behind them revolves around not offending the woman.

I mean, you shouldn't offend her for the sake of being a jerk, but look at this insipid shit or this. This one even suggests that something you should say to a woman is : "I'm sorry!".

Society raised you to act beta and say the most beta crap to woman. It isn't sufficient to adopt a Red Pill mindset, you need to become aware your communication habits with women and deliberately change them.

Anyway, I thought it would be fun if we made our own list of things NOT to say to a woman. Basically shit that the betas tend to say a lot. You can obviously use your discernment to decide when it's okay to say them, but generally I'd avoid them. So here I'll start and feel free to disagree and add more in the comments.

You are gorgeous/beautiful!: This has got to be the most popular beta-line. It's become the norm for even average girls to hear this compliment from thirsty betas, who then get pissed off when the woman accepts it. Do not compliment a woman on her looks lest you become one of her Instagram fan boys beta-orbiters. If you ever want to compliment her, compliment her on some skill (such as cooking).

Can I take you out some time?: This wording makes me cringe. It's essentially akin to asking for her permission to feed her and spend money on her. She'll immediately categorize you as a beta provider and withhold sex. I once heard a buddy ask a classmate out, she said she had plans with her girlfriends (because she was obviously not interested), he insisted and told her "I want to feed you!” lol. Betas say variations of this all the time. Avoid.

So...When's your birthday?: Are you planning to buy her a gift? Do you wanna analyze her horoscope? Nobody gives a shit what day she was born. Let her be the one asking you these feminine questions.

Yes! (I'll be happy to): A lot of women will outright ask you for favors in the beginning of the "relationship" as a shit test or to take advantage of you. You need to firmly turn her down, DO NOT DO HER ANY FAVORS, REPEAT: DO NOT DO HER ANY FAVORS.

I'm sorry: Women don't apologize for shit, and when they do, they don't usually mean it. They try to justify or blame on circumstances or even you. Society is teaching men to be apologetic to women for no apparent reason, make sure you're not falling for it.

Do you need help with that?: Don't carry her fucking bags, don't fix her fucking flat tire and don't do her math homework. Let the betas do that. You can't fall for that "damsel in distress" act. It's pure manipulation.

Do you have a boyfriend? (or are you single?): Are you trying to wife her up? Her relationship status is none of your business. If she didn't mention anything about a boyfriend or husband, then she's either single or looking to branch-swing. This question will make her believe you're interested in monogamy with her. Beta move. She should be the one asking you this (which is a massive IOI btw.).

You hurt my feelings: shaking my head I've heard so many guys say this. She shouldn't have that much power over you in the first place. Just dump her ass and move on.

Why don't you like me?: May be, just may be...because you're a nice guy?

You boyfriend/husband is a lucky man: really? is he?

you deserve better: She probably doesn't.

Oh :( you didn't deserve that: She probably did.

I apologize for my gender : She brought those dick pics upon herself.

I have a surprise for you: no no no please don't buy her any gifts and don't attempt any grand romantic gestures.

You're the first woman to make me happy: fuckin lol

Will you be my girlfriend?: or variations like "Am I your boyfriend now?", "what are we?", leave the relationshippy stuff to her, it's easier that way

Ladies first!: Fuck this, I hate this try-hard "chivalry" more than anything, I once had a sad white-knight chump try to lecture me on how to treat a certain "lady" because I was busting her balls. Please never say these words. Don't open doors for her and don't let her go in line before you, and don't give up your seat on the bus unless she's old or disabled.

How many guys have you been with?: Are you insecure she'll compare you?

Who's that guy I've seen you with?: You know what, don't even acknowledge that other guys exist. Jealousy is for betas. Leave it to them.

Do you like me? or Do you think I'm attractive? am I your type?: Don't EVER ask her what she thinks of you, don't look for validation or approval, and don't fish for compliments.

I love you: What is the point of this "confession"? what are you trying to accomplish? You want her to mutter these empty words back to you? Your feelings have zero effect on how she feels about you.

Will you marry me?: Is she rich or something? What am I missing?

What's your list?

EDIT: BTW I meant this list as a guideline, especially for beginners. NOT that you should actually never say these things. USE YOUR BRAIN to decide when it's appropriate depending on the situation or the woman


[–]Do not send modmail to my personal inboxCrazyHorseInvincible[M] [score hidden] stickied comment (0 children) | Copy Link

Getting a lot of whiny reports on this one.

I've looked at it. It stays. Get over it.

[–][deleted] 432 points433 points  (30 children) | Copy Link

Oh you are 17?

When's your birthday

[–]WelfareWarriorZ64 points65 points  (15 children) | Copy Link

Uhg I had a chick play some dumb shit pretending she was 19. I let her have it when she confessed. Fucking be careful guys.

[–][deleted] 64 points65 points  (14 children) | Copy Link

I banged a girl who was much much much younger than she looked. Watch out homies.

[–]plainposter10 points11 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

yeah me too.. no fucks given tho that asss was NIICE

[–]hugaddiction19 points20 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

until it gets you locked up for some bullshit drama you dont need

[–]menial_optimist 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

My philosophy is smash and then keep it on the DL lol.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

Bro young chicks will tell anyone and everyone and they aren’t good at hiding shit from their parents. All it takes is one angry dad or a broken condom and boom you’re a sex offender for life. I let her down as quickly and gently as I could... but tbh I did smash one more time because gawd damn dat booty

[–]menial_optimist4 points5 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

Yeah I agree. The consent age here is 16 though. Not saying do it.. but if you are, take proper steps ya know.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Where? I’m headed to the airport RN.

[–]SpaceTimeinFlux2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Japan is like 14 but old women over there still look like they're in high school (minus the facial wrinkles)

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

14? That's kinda fucked up.

[–]SpaceTimeinFlux6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Nationally it's 13 but each prefecture has its own rules. Tokyo is 18 for example.

[–]adam_varg 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

Most of United states is 16 ffs. Just cali and few others are higher.

Europe is 14-16, depends on state.

Dunno about rest of the world.

[–]MikeN_ike8 points9 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

As a 17 year old I came this close to fucking a 13 year old who's body and face literally looked like she was fucking 19 or something. Glad my boy tipped me in on it.

[–]juliusstreicher29 points30 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Glad my boy tipped me in on it.

You backed off, then HE fucked her!

[–]Imscubbabish13 points14 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The ol she 13 and he hit it trick.

[–]Mukato9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

the only valid use of this one, lol

[–]goldenhourlivin1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Pour one (actually like eight-ish) out for old blue pill me

[–]Gentlegiant2-1 points0 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Isn't age of consent 16 (in canada)? Does that mean i can get it on with a 17yo? Legit curious about this, I don't want to run into any legal issues

[–]vangodloss0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

18 and up can only have sex with 18 and up. When you're 17 and your girl's 16 you can have sex whereas if you're both 15 you're doing something illegal (technically)

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Though that can depend on local laws, etc.

Where I live, 17 is the age of consent. A 17 year old could legally screw a 60 year old and be fine, barring social consequences.

[–]gELSK0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

// , I think they're working on making it more complex, too

[–][deleted] 201 points202 points  (25 children) | Copy Link

This was pretty funny.

Do not compliment a woman on her looks lest you become one of her Instagram fan boys beta-orbiters. If you ever want to compliment her, compliment her on some skill (such as cooking).

I remember reading somewhere on this sub that when you compliment a girl, always start with "I think" so that you're not saying she is objectively cute, but that you find her cute. Been following that advice ever since and seems to work pretty well. Don't shower her with those, but a well-placed compliment of your opinion on her looks seems to work well.

[–]SovereignSoul7692 points93 points  (6 children) | Copy Link

always start with "I think" so that you're not saying she is objectively cute, but that you find her cute.

This is the shit that keeps me coming back here....

That's a good fucking insight, man.

[–]1YouLoveThisBTW36 points37 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Agreed. I wish this sub had more examples in it. I get the theory hands down. I want to hear examples!

What would be great is more posts of tinder conversations or text convos from right after the numbers close.

[–]youkickmyd0g5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Make a sidebar worthy collection to have your wish come true. Easy enough to find examples and link back to OPs, for example

[–]rigbed3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

More guys need to take risks and get laid first.

[–]not-trp-questions0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

"Having the theory hands down" might mean that you could create your own examples. Either in your imagination or irl.

[–]furcryingoutloud0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Keep your compliments sparse. Even in bed. Make them ask for compliments. You've got bigger things on your mind.

Her: "You haven't said anything about my hair"

You: "Like you didn't know it looks good?"

Don't get her used to compliments, this makes your compliments (when you decide to give them) way more valuable.

[–][deleted] 157 points158 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

I only compliment her physical attributes during sex. Pavlov's dog.

[–][deleted] 75 points76 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Compliments can be an easy way to establish man-to-woman though (make it clear why you're talking to her). Say you see a girl on the street, being direct can work well depending on where in the world you are.

In that case, there is a big difference between 1. Hi, you're cute so I had to come say hi 2. Hi, I saw you and I thought you were cute so I had to come say hi

Even during sex, I think it stimulates her emotions more to hear you say that you love that sexy ass of her's rather than just saying she has a sexy ass.

It's 90% vibe though.

[–]whatifitsfun 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

"Yeah...you like that, you fucking retard?"

[–]LordStoffelstein0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Omfg lol. I haven't heard this in hekka long

[–]plainposter7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

ohh pavlovian conditioning works SO WELL. reward behaviour that suits you, with your affection like a kiss or slap on the ass, and punish behaviour that you don't like, by crossing your arms or ignoring her, or hiding her cell phone so she focuses only on you, or telling her to get out of your house. super effective, drives them absoluutely crazy. i suggest everyone try it with at least 1 girl

[–]42-AX39 points40 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Making a first impression with an "I think" statement about her appearance has left women hungry for another one of those in my experience. They end up prettying themselves up and basically throw themselves at you if you use it wisely.

[–]Blackhawk247926 points27 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Mark Manson’s (Models) take on compliments is pretty much spot on - the compliment itself is not so important, but where it comes from is:

High SMV alpha guys complimenting girls = tingles

Low value beta guys complimenting girls = “ewww, gross”

Use your compliments wisely and strategically, gents.

[–]tropzumuch19 points20 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Or in other words: SMV the fuck up

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Problem is giving compliments automatically lowers your value. Even with girls I'm dating or fucking saying things like "you're hot", "you're beautiful", "you look amazing" will erode her lust for you

[–]cBIGONE22 points23 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

To extend this, i would say "i think your cute, so I wanted to say hi, and see what else you are about". This implies looks isn't going to give her a free pass

[–]Cant_Tell_Me_Nothin21 points22 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

If you wanna have fun with it say "I don't know about other people but I think you are cute"

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is some really good advice I’ll keep this in mind

[–]ep1939201 points202 points  (10 children) | Copy Link

"You boyfriend/husband is a lucky man: really? is he?"

Fuckin screams feminine cuckold.

[–]Lullababy9 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

Can agree, nothing more annoying as a "Are you single" question

[–]Lefort30002 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Its a prime example of putting pussy on a pedestal.

[–]tonyfaulkner65 points66 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Bleed but do not show it. That's the best way of summarizing it, and to be honest as men we are nothing if we are not strong. We may be born a male but we cannot be men without having strength oozing from us. Thank you for your list, but to be honest, thank you for the point hidden in all these kinds of messages: Be strong and firm.

[–]whatifitsfun 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

That is the definition of TRP to me.

Bleed but do not show it.

It was painful to accept that you can never show vulnerability; never be intimately sincere. But if there is something that distinguishes a man from a boy, then it is exactly that - the will to be the one who does things, instead of the one who is seen doing things.

[–]menial_optimist16 points17 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

I don't know how far to take this. No woman wants to be with a guy who is an emotional robot literally never showing anything. Then again the opposite, being an effeminate emotional tampon is equally big a turn off. I think the ideal women want (and we should want) is a balance. Maybe 75 alpha 25 beta for instance.

Men have emotions too and they are important. I refuse to go back to a pre-1950s level where men were just supposed to never cry and bottle everything up. Thats why you had guys who would drink whisky on the daily.

[–]salemlax2312 points13 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I think it's more of a goal to aim for rather than a hard rule to show minimal emotion. There are always emotions that will be too strong to suppress, namely that of extreme happiness or satisfaction. These are positive emotions that make a guy look good. I believe the goal is to suppress negative emotions and deal with them internally, rather than having them spew out like a faucet.

If you aim for 100/0 and slip to 75/25 then you're golden, but if you're aiming for 75/25 and slip to 50/50 that's not where you want to be.

I agree with your 75/25 idea, but I think that should be the acceptable emotional leak (not sure of better wording) rather than the goal.

[–]menial_optimist7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

100/0 is not ideal. Suppression of real emotions should not be the objective. Rather, control of or understanding of emotion should. If you think 100/0 is going to work in a LTR or marriage relationship you're dreaming. Unless your some kind of dark triad master who has a woman in a kind of "beaten wife" state 24/7 100% of women are going to leave if you're 100/0 100% of the time.

[–]salemlax231 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

My wording was probably poor, it's difficult to use definite quantities when discussing something that doesn't have defined quantities (emotions).

I agree with you that 100/0 isn't ideal, that's not what I was attempting to say. Throwing out the percentages, the gist of what I was thinking is that you should aim high because you're going to fall short. Body language, attitude, etc. are going to give away emotions when you don't expect them too.

As you said (and I have poorly attempted to say) control of emotions is the goal.

[–]Mixuh95 points96 points  (20 children) | Copy Link

I agree on everything except one, helping with some things you're capable of. For example fixing the flat tyre or carrying heavy bags etc.

This is from a LTR perspective, women like it when you fix stuff and do any masculine productive activities that benefit them. Just never let her take it for granted.

But don't go being a manservant for a woman you're not in a relationship with, that will never end well.

[–]cBIGONE19 points20 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I agree with you. IMO the best way to handle the fix a flat tire type of situations is to get her to do something for you. "I'll be right over to fix the tire babe, im hungry so have dinner ready",or something to that effect.

If you get something like "I'm not your slave" or snarky comment, simply agree and amplify.

This way you are masculine, and putting her in her feminine role at the same time.

Edit: to add to this. Don't be afraid to ask her to do things for you. Women do this all the time. In the end it's mostly about balance, and trying not to over think every little thing

[–]allala9326 points27 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Don’t go being a manservant for a woman that you are in a relationship with. I cannot express how wrong that will end up.

[–]TurielD 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

Absolutely, never demonstrate manliness or strength. Wouldn't want to turn your girl on now would you?

[–]Mixuh12 points13 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Showing masculine traits and being a servant are two different things. You can reward women with forementioned services. But I've seen this situation too often: A guy keeps changing her every light bulb, relocating her furniture and assembling her new bed where she fucks another guy later the same evening.

Showing masculinity by doing masculine activities is good, but it should be a reward for her feminine activities such as cooking, cleaning, giving head etc.

[–]mummersfarce_is_done26 points27 points  (13 children) | Copy Link

Yes but be aware! Upon meeting new women, if they like you they usually ask you to carry some stuff for "innocent" reasons. You might think "why not help someone in need?". Do not fall for it!

[–]InstigatingDrunk6 points7 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

I think the point here is to act nonchalantly and do it because its your choice. If she asks again, you can just say no. Sets boundaries. You don't want to scare someone off and seem like a jerk.. yet lol.

[–]mummersfarce_is_done0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

I've found it to be one of the stupid ways they test men. So just be a jerk about it and see their reaction. You will not gain anything by helping them, but by being an unreasonable jerk...

[–]youkickmyd0g0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Right down to curious little 6 year olds. Funny. Make them say the magic word. Adapt slightly for older women if needed. This is kinda dominance/boundary testing that is natural. Kids feel safe with boundaries, and women should too.

[–]youkickmyd0g0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Pretend she has a dick and consider the situation. Listen to her and don't get unvested and make her turn off at command from time to time if she's telling you good intel/insights and yoy're stuck with her. Just maintain the illusion of penis.

[–]Mg12218 points9 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I usually try to teach my GF things she doesn't know. Like fixing a flat tire. Then say " now you know how. You can do it yourself" I don't except anyone to be able to just do something without any knowledge on how. But I do expect them to do it if they know how.

[–]chim_city19 points20 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

most women will text everyone on their cellphone for help before ever attempting to try it on their own

[–]Yezdigerd8 points9 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Reminds me of a friend of mine who was asked to help a couple of girls who struggled with a coffee machine, It didn't take him long to figure it out and then he started explaining the issue to them assuming they would be curious to know, but they just put out their cups said thanks and moved on. They wanted the coffee not knowledge, should they encounter the issue again, well chances are there is another a dude around.

[–]Bla23ik8n2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

This happens all the time in school too. I️ have chicks come up to me all the time wanting me to teach them about a certain science. Don’t fall for this bullshit. There are tutors and teachers that help teach that shit. It’s all a huge shit test. They’ll first want the answers and next thing you know you’re buying them a study snack or coffee. FUCK THAT.

[–]always-distracted5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

teach those bitches biology

[–]bl18712 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

What if it's some heavy shit that they are seriously struggling with?

[–]Barbuhgurth136 points137 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Laugh at her face, then immediately go post on trp about how much of an alpha psychopath Machiavellian you are

[–]BillSander11 points12 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This thread just keeps getting better.

[–]loviathrowaway199435 points36 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

Saying you're beautiful is not beta at all imo. Can signal confidence in your own opinion and express sexual interest. Just say it in an assertive alpha manner

[–]Salted_Pretzel17 points18 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Agreed. It's how you say it. Say it like a dork, you'll look like a dork.

[–]loviathrowaway19942 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

And to be totally fair women don't hear this that often. No one straight up tells them they are beautiful. This way you can stand out from the crowd.

Don't linger on it for too long. Just make an honest observation and then continue with your fucking day, you're a man of value and have shit to do.

[–]askmrcia7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Saying they are beautiful is hands down the most cliche movie line of all time.

It's just overused whether the woman heard it or not. I do agree with you though, it's how you say it. You can pretty much say anything, but it comes down to how you say it

[–]PLaTinuM_HaZe-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Agreed, and I would add that the point that the OP was making was more about new women... gonna compliment an LTR every once in a blue moon.

[–]y_mr_y31 points32 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

its not about what you say

its about how you say it

you can ask her to marry you and tell her she is the most beautiful woman alive, depends only on how you say it.

I said about half of those things and got laid, just always give the impression that maybe you don't mean it so even if you slip up and give her an actual compliment she is not sure if you mean it or playing a joke on her.

Obviously we are talking face to face or over the phone.

[–]itsjustsimon-2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yup, it does not matter if your SMV is high enough, you can say everything OP wrote not to say and you'll still get laid. But for recovering beta, this shit is good to think about.

[–]Senior Contributorexit_sandman22 points23 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Peter Griffin has nailed it down what you have to say

Also, two things:

Do you need help with that?

If it's her dessert, then this might be a legitimate question.

I have a surprise for you:

If it's lube or cuffs (depending on what she's into), this might be a legitimate line.

[–]Ichewfivegum34 points35 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

I have a surprise for you works in one situation. Your fucking her doggystyle and the surprise is a thumb up her ass.

[–]2Dmva1008 points9 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Or a quick spin around and bust on her face

[–]RPTA349816 points17 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

When I'm going through an automatic sliding door I tell my girl, "let me get that door for you". I'm such a gentleman.

[–]allala9328 points29 points  (18 children) | Copy Link

I love you.

Game. Set. Match.

[–][deleted] 37 points38 points  (5 children) | Copy Link

"I.. I think I'm falling in love with you.. oh, sorry, I shouldn't have told you but, you know.. it's true. I feel nervous when I'm around you, feel butterflies, and I'm SURE there is something special between me and you. My life is, like, at a turning point and you can be the most important chapter of it. My mom will be proud to meet you, wait, I'm calling her, tomorrow you are invited to lunch, then I'll show my old pictures and we'll play some games with her. Woah, it's gonna be great. So, well, yeah, if you can, of course, or if you want.. or both, eheh, anyways what's your favourite flower?"

[–]tropzumuch10 points11 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The problem about this shit is that every man knows to be that pathetic by default, but not how to be TRP way.

[–]TheTruthHelps4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I couldn't read through this.

[–]Batmansiphone5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Basically said this to a girl about a year ago, she immediately ended it with me.

[–]Mukato1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

watched a movie with the SO and this exact paragraph was in it; fucking cringe-fest.

[–]Davidskylarkk9 points10 points  (11 children) | Copy Link

Call all women "love" they like it a lot! More so in the US since in Europe they do this in a lot of countries...

This works two ways, it gives them the little feeling like maybe he loves me. when you call another woman love in front of target they start to subconsciously kick in the competitive nature...

[–]jonib0ni28 points29 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Nah dude that's corny as fuck.

[–]Htowngetdown1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Plus it's a half step away from saying "I love you" and sending kissy face emojis. No thanks.

[–]Davidskylarkk3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

And you're a chromosome away from being a chick....

[–]Davidskylarkk-2 points-1 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Some can't pull it off, I agree...

[–]supersonic-turtle2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I second this, that word has power.

[–]mwait 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

This works surprisingly well.

A simple "hey love" goes a long way if it's used correctly.

[–]BillSander0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Hmm... perhaps use it with other women too around her. That should get the feelz going.

[–]behindtheline400 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I agree. Entirely depends on confidence and if you're generally attractive.

[–]Solistx 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

I see these lists and then I just fucking hate myself. Its like I know all the info, and then when I go out, all the knowledge is gone. I face palmed so hard.

At least I know where I fucked up. Maybe I should cut my own fucking balls off to because I obviously dont know how to use them... Christ.

[–]42-AX35 points36 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Don't sweat it bro, as long as you keep accomplishing small goals on a daily basis you'll get there. Baby steps.

[–]Hamilton950B7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Baby steps, and one step at a time. Go out one night and work on nothing but eye contact. Next week, not saying stupid shit. Next week, kino. Next, posture. (these are just examples). You can't do it all at once.

[–]Davidskylarkk12 points13 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Don't throw general compliments ever! It's easy to remember to zero in on something specific and compliment that. I see these guys saying, " oh your so cute I had to talk to you." Makes me cringe! Find something on her physically, not something she is wearing!!

[–]1CoupDeGrace221 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Sweating the small stuff should hint to you something else is lacking, friendly reminder.

It doesn't fucking matter what you say in small conversations, what matters is who you are and how you say it.

Calum von Mogger asks women for change to buy baby formula and just because he is Calum fucking von mogger and wears a suit he gets not only the change but also gets hit on by the woman.

Meanwhile your average loser can't even say hello without being ignored.

If your reaction to that is "Unfair" "Fuck women wtf is this shit?" then you're in the wrong sub.

[–]truecrisis6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Try self hypnosis. It let's you speak to your subconscious.

I swear this shit works. Michael Sealey on YouTube works for me.

[–]HopeFarmer4 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I had that problem too. You've got to reframe your mental accounting of the interactions to favor delayed social gratification. For example, I used to feel bad that a girl wasn't texting me back and assume I was losing something. I would also feel bad when a girl acted sad that I didn't say "I love you too" or something like that. Over time I have learned to see it as a different kind of game. When she's not texting back or she's acting sad, that just means "it's your move" (see: "shit test"). If you reflexively tell her some needy or flattering nonsense or express deferential feelings, you will lose the game. If you resist the urge, you will lose nothing and occasionally score a major victory.

It's painful to internalize at first but it gets you results faster than any other lesson I've found here. I realized that when I just ignored the girls acting upset or ignoring me, tons of them started inviting me to do things, sending flirty messages randomly, and aggressively initiating sexual interactions. Now when a girl ignores me or acts needy I just pat myself on the back for a small victory. If you can stick with it, this tactic works especially well on girls who already think of you as a beta orbiter because subverting their expectations will drive their hamsters crazy.

[–]Mukato1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

pick one off the list and work on either over-using it on purpose, or focus on not using it for 2 weeks and notice the changes in yourself and others you interact with.

then pick another one and do the same thing.

After a while, you'll have gained mastery over each one of them.

[–]InHouse_Banana3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I feel you bro, I've been there, but with time, it becomes second nature. Just, Ffs, keep track of your screw ups, otherwise you'll never get better at the game.

[–]Solistx 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

Yeah, definitely trying to keep track of my mistakes. Its getting slightly easier as time goes on, but still a LONG way to go.

[–]thefisherman19614 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

The more you internalize the pill, the easier it becomes to just instinctively not do any of that shit, without even having to think about it. You'll have to actively flip the beta switch on and off to say these things.

[–]JackGetsIt1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

That's because it's one thing to learn something and it's another entirely to practice it in real life.

In fact over learning and under implementing can become a real detriment to your development.

Maybe I should cut my own fucking balls off too because I obviously dont know how to use them... Christ.

Ah. Don't do that. Actually do you mind if I workshop a draft of a future post on you?

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon22 points23 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Yup, agreed on all points.

Next: things you SHOULD say to her:

Nice rack

How old are you!? (You should say this in such a way that any answer is wrong)

You'll make some guy very unhappy one day

There's something fairly attractive about you....

Oh. I thought you were a lesbian. (For bonus points mispronounce lesbian as lesbeen or paraphrase in some other comedic way)

You're only saying that because you're on the rag. Immediately follow up any objections with "hmmm...thought so".

And answer at least some of her shit tests by withdrawing your attention, looking away, pointing your body away, and generally losing interest in her.

Young women who are attracted to you love this all controversial shit and find it very attractive (especially combined with not saying all the pussy-drying comments that OP outlined). Feminists, older women, provider hunters, unattractive and unattracted women all hate it with a passionate fury. Double win.

[–]Lullababy9 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

Being young, I prefer a "nice ass/rack" than a "nice hair"

[–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Will you marry me? Is she rich or something?

This is absolutely unreal. If you agree at all with this sentiment, you have disappeared up your own asshole.

You want to know what makes men into 'alphas'??? Confidence. That's it. And it doesn't come from some fucking book, or belief, or value, or rule. It comes from work. Contribute something to the world. Do something that isn't all about you. Be a part of something bigger.

The fact that you all really want to hear advice about how to be confident shows exactly what your problem is: you're looking for the easy way. Let me ask you something. Would it really be that great if you could actually follow all these rules and everything else in TRP and thus seem like you're confident? Or would it be better to actually gain some real confidence in yourself and then not need to follow any neckbeard's rules?

[–]2Dmva100-3 points-2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Confidence is an nonsexual attribute (betabux) that women only prioritize over looks and AF qualities once they have hit the wall and need BB qualities for LTRs.

[–]mp11111 points12 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Don't say I love you? Then how do you get them to have sex with you? /s

[–]ReinhardVonLoengram5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

"Don't carry her fucking bags, don't fix her fucking flat tire and don't do her math homework. Let the betas do that. You can't fall for that "damsel in distress" act. It's pure manipulation"

Bs. I lost my virginity over a gilr asking me to come over and put up her shitty bedroom canopy. Put it up, asked if i wanted to watch a movie, 30 minutes into My Pet Dragon and i was fucking inside said canopy.

It's all about context. If she's contributing , it's not a problem.

[–]m0rphing1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Yeah but you had to set up her bed for her. That's fucking gay. If she was hot I would probably come over, not touch the canopy because fuck that, and then ask what the REAL reason she wanted me over for is, with a smirk.

[–]ReinhardVonLoengram2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Honestly, i kissed her on the cheek at work before. This was just a an excuse for getting me over to fuck to rationalize the whoreness away. If there's clear chemistry, her asking you to do things is a plus, especially at her fucking house lol,

[–]Kizzou12 points13 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is why it's so important to get out of the house and interface with women. As long as you try to stay mindful, you can observe the interaction in a more objective manner and later reflect and learn.

These things are of no issue for me. I'll say whatever is on my mind to a women or man without an ounce of concern as to what their opinion is of me. Does that mean I purposefully disrespect Them? No, I just attempt to express myself as honestly as I can in that moment. My biggest issue is the approach. I just Inhibit myself at times. It's weird.

Anyway, great post bro!

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Whenever I accidentally bump into a girl I accidentally say "Oh, I'm sorry!" and it makes me want to fucking kms. It's like the phrase is coded into my brain and I can't even physically say "excuse me" unless I wait and think about what I'm going to say...

[–]2Dmva1002 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

If you have high SMV they will actually apologize to you very quickly. The same rule applies to holding doors. Women who think you're hot will often hold the door for you even after their Beta has already held it open for them.

Go for the close if this happens. A big IOI that many miss.

[–]majorketone1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I relate to this a lot. I'll accidentally say sorry just for getting in people's way and I'll immediately get pissed at myself for saying it. Its hard to overcome the programming

[–]BillSander1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Apologies are beaten into your programing from an early age. Work on your mental point of origin and take small opportunities to be a dick without saying you're sorry. It feels wrong at first, but gets easier.

Ex. I mistakenly cut a line recently... saw what I did when I saw people walk up who were standing there. Focused on dgaf, and at lunch like a boss.

[–]AbeJFroman1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Try being Canadian.... lol it's practically automatic that everyone says it... I switched to "excuse me" or saying nothing but once in a while a sorry slips out

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Never say: “lady, you are a lousy lay.”

She will never forgive you. Ever. Not even in the next lifetime.

[–]2Dmva1005 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

That's a good way to see if she's down to be a cuckquean though.

[–]MrillRedPill3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I've banged alot of women off tinder by telling them that their beautiful so I'm not so sure about rule#1

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

If your SMV is high enough, you can do/say whatever you want.

[–]1empatheticapathetic9 points10 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

All of these are great if said sarcastically.

A well timed "gorgeous" works pretty well though but I agree it should be super rare. It's a good 'pull' if you've pushed hard. I've only used it when parting ways and it causes them to want to change plans/give a strong physical exit.

[–]EightyTimes6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Naw man.

Feel free to hold doors open, carry stuff for her, if it's YOUR IDEA. You're a big fucking strong guy, who not do a bunch of stuff that demonstrates how effortless it is for you to carry her books? You're demonstrating that you can kick somebody's ass if need be.

Just... When you do these things... Do it because it's YOUR IDEA, not because you were asked or you feel obligated.

[–]beachbbqlover 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

Your edit is appropriate. This is guideline stuff that you need to consider, not ever say.

You are gorgeous/beautiful!:

This is appropriate when she's put in effort to look particularly beautiful - grad party grade. Makeup and outfit on point, hair awesome. If she is looking like this, then she's put the work in.

This is not appropriate for randomly throwing at HB6 working at the office because you desperately need to tap that. Doing so spoils the value of the sentence and the person.

You should probably also notice that even if she has put in the work, if all she's seeing at that point from every man is this then joining the ranks doesn't exactly make you stand out.

So...When's your birthday?:

Your point is that small-talk has to be secondary. "I can't be just friends because I have places to be and people to do". If she's taking care of things then to me, go ahead.

Yes! (I'll be happy to):

A lot of women will outright ask you for favors in the beginning of the "relationship" as a shit test or to take advantage of you.

The key point here is that if she's worth her salt, this has to go both ways. Same with anyone else. Don't get strung along because you're a desperate bitch, but don't be afraid to do stuff for someone who just saved your ass in a meeting because reddit says so or you're an ass.

I'm sorry:

There's a difference between asshole bosses and leaders, and one of the key ones is that leaders are accountable and asshole bosses gaslight people. If you're apologizing, do it mindfully rather than just blurting it out because you feel bad. Do it as a leader. Women don't apologize because they're not usually leaders, and they're not expected to be.

Do you have a boyfriend? (or are you single?):

The point here is that you have no interest in this until after you're already involved. Until you're already very involved. At which point, it's more of a "okay, ditch the other guys, I've got this" than a "are you single?"

You hurt my feelings:

This simply doesn't happen in a meaningful way until about a year in, and at that point the subtle cues you give her about what is acceptable and disappointing should be enough. If she does disappoint you, that's how you take it if you are the leader. "I'm disappointed in how you've handled this. [consequence]"

You boyfriend/husband is a lucky man:

Say this once in your life, never more. Save it for that time.

you deserve better:

You're basically saying "you are worth more than him" which inflates her number. If your number isn't much better than his, this is a failed strategy.

I have a surprise for you:

I've been invited to [insert awesome travel destination here] and you can come. Do this when it makes sense to you but realize that if she's showing loyalty and does a good job, you can too.

Ladies first!:

Only when it's funny.

How many guys have you been with?:

After a few dozen you can tell. You can also tell which ones make you happier. Myself, I always preferred the sluttier girls, but the one I'm with is weird and I'm only her 2nd nominally.

Who's that guy I've seen you with?:

I've said this as a joke. It's appropriate when she's leveraging an orbiter who's clearly (even to her) several notches lower than you.

Do you like me? or Do you think I'm attractive? am I your type?:

I said this once to a chick that had a weird tattooed pierced asian slut look because I was willing to sacrifice her to get the in on her type.

I love you:

We've been together 10 years. You say this occasionally and mindfully, and without prompting. It's also fun to make her say it when she's ready to orgasm and staring you in the eyes.

tl-dr; explaining the ins and outs of how that list applies differently so people understand it better

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

re is that if she's worth her salt, this has to go both ways. Same with anyone else. Don't get strung along because you're a desperate bitch, but don't be afraid to do stuff for someone who just saved your ass in a meeting becaus

Yes this comment-

Written by one who's been there and done it.

[–]bossplayaintraining7 points8 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

And now I don’t get how to talk to a girl.

[–]lIIlllIIlIIllIlllIIl 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

Talk like she's a regular person that needs to earn your approval. Not some goddess on a pedestal.

[–]bossplayaintraining1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

And I’m assuming it’s possible for me to show my interest to them without directly telling them about it. I think escalation is the way to go about it. And I also think that instead of asking, “Can I get your phone number?” and shit like that, I should turn it into commands.

Correct me if I’m wrong.

[–]behindtheline402 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Giving anyone attention that you have no obligation to usually shows interest

[–]Mukato0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

what works for me when it's at that point in the convo where i want the number: Hand them my phone on the add contact page and say "let me have your number"

It's the command form, but I don't put command tone behind it. also the phone is right there to put it in.

[–]baron_vladimir-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Emotions are conveyed through actions, not words

[–]Salted_Pretzel5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Tease them. Talk to them normal but add light teases here and there. Practice makes perfect.

[–]askmrcia1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You can say whatever you want to be honest. Most times it's not what you say but how you say it.

You can say "I thought you were cute so I had to talk to you" if you say it sarcastically and in a way you know she heard it before and then take it from there while looking at her sexually. It's your body language and non verbals that helps.

I know what I said kind of sounds complicated, but it's really not. It becomes second nature the more you practice.

A little hint, when alcohol involved your words mean even less.

[–]bmunny1963 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

"I feel...": This is one I'm trying to avoid. She doesn't care about your feelings, won't empathize, and won't accept any responsibility for how you feel. Just set your boundaries and expectations and call her on her shit when necessary. Explaining how her actions make you feel might be considered by some as "good communication" but it ultimately puts you in the beta zone.

[–]Maple_Beard-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I feel can also just be a sign that someone is more of a kinesthetic as opposed to auditory or visual. It does t necessarily have to do with feelings. For a kinesthetic “I feel” replaces “I think”

[–]en_men_lu_ana2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You should also point out that honesty is unwanted. Every time I was honest about chick and people/things/events related to her, it didn't end up good for me.

After some years of experience I can only tell that females prefer comforting lies above anything. And they really don't give a fuck about your opinion.

[–]itsjustsimon-2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

If you need to think about saying or not saying this shit, you are focusing on the wrong thing. Raise your SMV.

[–]Whisker-biscuitt2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Well fuck me, this list just woke me up. TLDR; 40 yrs old, always played a good alpha, but also been in LTR for 18 years, on-off. Kids, complicates things. Meet girl decade younger than me, lots of hot sex, and then wouldn’t you know it, I’m doing shit on this damn list.

So really, thanks for posting this. I needed a wake up as this current girl is great, yeah sure, but there will be no “relationship”, and I gotta keep myself in check. This may be an excuse, but TRP mentality is getting harder to prioritize as I get older. What’s worse is I seem to be attracting more plates though as I age, so that’s a bonus, but only if I can keep my mentality where it belongs.

[–]IvyExcess0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Black dragon blog will do you a world of good

[–]Brickles096 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Except for the ‘ladies first’ part, as I’m not a muslim, it’s everything else spot on.

[–]SovereignSoul764 points5 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Great post. I feel dirty when I think about how many of these I've said in my BP days :( shame

[–]thunderbeyond1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah its like a shameful checklist for me too. Not any more though.

[–]JackGetsIt3 points4 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I agree with the gist of this post but I think a lot of people will read it and get confused because you can literally say all this stuff on a daily basis and get laid like gangbusters. It's all about frame, timing, attitude, value, social position, delivery.

In fact a few of these probably need to be said at certain times tactfully within relationships.

I do agree with this one

I apologize for my gender

NEVER EVER EVER say this to a women unless it's completely in jest, i.e. sorry not sorry.

[–]m0rphing1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

These tips are mostly for guys who are really struggling with neediness, in which case they are valuable. For guys who already 'get it' you can pretty much say anything.

[–]allala932 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Never ever say this in the presence of a man either.

[–]Jonlife3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Tom Segura said it Beautifully the other day on the Rogan podcast. Paraphrasing: once you show any interest in them, they become disinterested.

So Stop showing interest. Stop caring. And you'll be miserable in trying to get rid of them.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (7 children) | Copy Link

All good but, absolutely change her flat tire if it happens: learn how to do that, make it seem easy (it actually is) and she'll love the whole situation, looking at you in adoration like a little child.

[–]Casanova-Quinn5 points6 points  (4 children) | Copy Link

Agreed. Having manly skills is definitely attractive. However you shouldn't be any girl's on call repairman. Use your skills only when it's convenient to your situation.

[–]m0rphing1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Having "manly skills" like being able to fix stuff makes you attractive as a beta utility provider. The only skill you need if you want to be attractive as a dick-provider is social dominance.

[–]Casanova-Quinn0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

That’s not true. Being able to fix things shows that you’re self sufficient, you don’t rely on anyone. That’s not a beta trait.

[–]m0rphing1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

It's a beta trait to fix her shit. You can fix your own stuff all you want.

[–]Casanova-Quinn0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I️ said don’t be any girl’s repairman in my first comment dude. Read more carefully.

[–]m0rphing0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I absolutely would not do that because it's fucking stupid. I'm not going to do shit for some woman who wants me to be her bitch. Like what am I going to say, "Yeah sure I'll come change your tire without any guarantee that I'll get anything out of it. I just have nothing better to do than fix your problems for you and possibly not gain from it in any way. That's my idea of a good time."

She can get one of her betas to do that or she can pay someone to do it.

[–]BillSander-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

If you frame it like she is a helpless child and you dgaf if she feels helped or not... maybe.

[–]cmars1188 points9 points  (8 children) | Copy Link

What do you think a relationship is? Because everything you listed makes it sound like you need to be some kind of unfeeling robot just to assert your masculinity. It's the definition of insecurity.

Don't tell a woman you love them? Are you serious? You do realize there is a way to have self-respect and be strong/confident in your masculinity while still admitting your feelings to a woman. One of the constant risks of entering a relationship is the possibility that, since you're putting your feelings out there, you might get screwed/hurt. But that doesn't mean you should restructure your entire character or be afraid of being sensitive. You know PLENTY of women also do the things you listed above. And in relationships, plenty of men screw over women all the time. Yeah lots of the things you mentioned are sentimental, cheesy, lovey dovey, and plenty of people take it too far, and that's when it becomes potentially detrimental to your own well-being. But that cheesy, lovey dovey shit is part of what makes us human. And in the long run, it never pays off to be cold and calculating. No matter how much of a grasp you think you have on women.

[–]Bla23ik8n5 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I’m glad there’s guys like you around. Without dudes like you, we wouldn’t have any chicks in LTR to bang.

[–]m0rphing1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

You're still blue pilled my friend. That cheesy, lovey dovey shit is not part of what makes us human. You have been sold a lie of how you are supposed to behave, but it's not the real deal. Sorry to break it to ya buddy.

[–]cmars118-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

To be clear, I would never want to be labeled as "red-pilled". I acknowledge that I do not align with the beliefs of this sub, I was linked here from somewhere else on Reddit and I found this post.

The truth of the matter is this: Love exists. If you love somebody who treats you well and also loves you, it is wrong not to show it. I genuinely hope you come to see this as a beautiful thing rather than a surrendering to a lie. I do not see the world like it's an indie film, where people are falling in love left and right and running through meadows at sunset, and I do not think love is measured by how many boxes of chocolate or roses you buy, and I do not believe posting couple selfies to Instagram is endearing or the sign of a strong relationship. So don't tell me I've simply bought a lie, because you don't know me. I dated a girl for four years who ended up breaking up with me over Facetime. And there are people who have been screwed over in ways a million times worse than that. It was shitty, but it was a learning experience. There are awful, manipulative men and women out there, but there are also lots of great people. Just because I disagree with you, I'm not here to say I think you're an idiot or a bigot or anything like that. No one can force you to act a certain way, but all I ask is that you don't lose faith in an entire gender. Keep reaching out.

There are lots of complications and questions that come from how men and women relate to each other, but "Don't tell people you love them" isn't the answer to any of them.

[–]m0rphing0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

I think you're probably a smart, decent guy who's at least somewhat attractive and you get by pretty well by following the standard societal norms regarding dating and all that.

I may have misjudged your beliefs, but I think you've also misjudged this subreddit. We understand love exists. But we don't think love is the end-game that should be pursued, the highest ideal to aim for, like most people today believe. Instead, most of us like to have a lot of sex, usually with multiple women. So we don't really care much about love. It's cool if women love us, but it's only optional, and same with us loving them. And when we do love a woman it's not important to show it, because doing so rarely increases the amount of sex we have, and in many cases it actually decreases the amount of sex we have. In a few cases showing your affection in a strong way can be beneficial, and some of us do that and have success with it.

I think the main difference between us here is that you want to love and be loved. I want to fuck, a LOT, and whether there is also love present or not isn't important to me. Either we have different values, or one of us is lying to ourselves about our true values.

[–]BullshittingNonsense0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

This guy is such a major dope

Edit: by this guy I mean the guy who wrote the post

[–]cmars118 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

Is that in reference to me or OP?

[–]bobbydreddits1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

Thought about buying a plate flowers and leaving a note saying "you're annoying". Acceptable?

[–]m0rphing1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Seems like a beta gesture to me, no matter what you write on the card. If I was a woman I'd be like, "Ok yeah he wrote I'm annoying on the card but he still went to the trouble of buying flowers for me. I must really be on his mind all the time or something."

[–]qwerty1234571 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

We as a society don't do a great job explaining what makes one successful at dating. People are told women like "nice guys" and you internalize that to mean push over the doormats, instead of being decent humans. You mistake a desire for confidence and self sufficiency for a preference for jerks. You hear things like confidence is sexy, but can't differentiate confidence from being condescending asshats. When your skewed perceptions don't work out for you you start lashing and end up in disgusting circle jerks like these, because people like you hate being self reflective and owning up to your own shit. I'm a woman.

[–]hugaddiction1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Great start buddy, let's add this one to the list, "Can I Kiss You?". If your 14 this is ok, if your older, you should know when there is chemistry, and when there is not.

[–]TuckerP 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

I feel like this is all false tho. I say this shit all the time and I get laid like a madman.

[–]m0rphing1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

If you're hot enough or dominant enough it doesn't matter what you say, but these tips do help guys who are pretty average.

[–]barb92121 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Can I take you out some time?

I always avoided saying this because it's giving the woman a chance to back out. "I usually say lets go do xyz", or "I'm going to xyz you coming" How do you guys ask woman to meet up with you or hang out with you?

[–]furcryingoutloud1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

I say whatever is gonna get me laid. Each time. I love you, you're beautiful. Anything as long as it gets me laid. Yeah, I know, I'm an asshole, but then again, I get laid a lot.

Basically, as OP says in his edit, you have to use your head. Timing is everything. Getting those feelz is the objective.

[–]m0rphing1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

You're on the right track for sure and maybe you 'get it'. The key is that sometimes getting laid isn't worth doing certain shit. Sometimes you'll do something just to get laid (and you succeed) and then the girl puts you in that category of "guy who will do x to get laid and I can manipulate him because of it". It's important for dudes to remember that it's not "pussy at any cost", it's "pussy only if it's convenient for you and on your terms."

[–]furcryingoutloud1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You are so right. And I would like to make very clear that I agree with your assessment and that at the same time, it takes some level of experience to pull it off without turning blue. It is basically a game of push and pull that will get you more than what you give.

"pussy only if it's convenient for you and on your terms."

Thank you for this. I should have put more thought into my comment and mentioned it. Thanks.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

I'll disagree on calling a woman beautiful or saying ladies first, but the rest I will 100 percent agree with.

I try to be a classic old fashion man, and that angle has worked out for me so far, but I guess it's all how you do it. Women do love men who love to be men.

If I see a woman standing in line for coffee with me wearing some sexy leather boots or just a well put together woman, I'll straight up tell her what I like. Note: I'll be specific about what it is that I like, not just a generic "you're beautiful." It catches most off guard since the vast majority of men don't compliment women like that, usually makes their day, and is a great conversation starter.

[–]Mr-Kabuki1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

Why cant I say "can I take you out sometime?" what am I supposed to say?

[–]Senior ContributorSkorchZang3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Many reasons. "Sometime" makes it sound like you are always available, at her beck and call, desperately wanting this to happen. That's not how an attractive man acts around women, and they know it, so they correctly assume you're low status, if they hear this from you.

"Can I take you out" is a phrase from 1960 when we still had a "dating culture". It's long dead and buried in 2017, however there are many blue pill men who live according to what Rollo calls "The Old Books". They try to play the chivalry/dating/nice guy game, expecting this will get them laid; they push for relationship, thinking this will let them lock her pussy down for themselves; they allow themselves to be pressured into marriage by women, because they believe they owe the woman marriage if she's been letting them regularly fuck her.

Women know about "the old books" being dead, it's not difficult for them since they're mercenary by nature and very pragmatic - that bullshit simply makes them laugh, on some level. They get that it's theatre, and it's contemptible theatre too. But they also know about the blue pill idiots, who will LARP this stuff till the cows come home, because that's the only thing they know. So women use those guys, sometimes very brutally. You don't want to be putting out this blue pill "old books guy" vibe.

So what should you say?

"I'm going to be doing ABC on Thurs night. Wanna come?"

Specific day and time, no blue pill "dating" bullshit, and you're inviting her to something you're already doing with or without her, for your own entertainment.

If it's a woman you barely know, "what do you like coffee or tea? k, let's grab a cuppa and get to know what fascinating people you and I are. Tuesday work?"

Or maybe: "Hey you know, you're kinda cute. Let's you and me get some covfefe, there's a nice place over there.."

Infinite variations, you just have to get the correct tone and intent down. You need to dump the old books way completely, with its pussy worship and LARPing, but you can still be very charming. Or even more so, without it.

[–]Mr-Kabuki1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

so you should tell the girl that you two should go out instead of asking her. That makes sense. Just a couple questions:

In the first example, you should invite her to do something that you are already doing. But what fun things are you supposed to be doing yourself anyways? I mean if you wanna take her to the movies, you mention that you were going to go the movies by yourself before inviting her and people generally see going to the movies alone as weird and only for friendless people. (same can be said for going to restaurants, concerts, museums, ice skating)

In the third example, you give the girl a compliment before asking her out, isn't that usually a bad idea?

thanks.

[–]take1fortheteam2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

May I* because can I is just bad grammar.

[–]Guthix4Days0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Jealousy is pretty much a difficult emotion to circumvent. I also occasionally find myself having a bit of it.

Just control it and make sure you use it to improve yourself - don't let it consume you.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

"I apologize for my gender."

Oh, man hahaha.

[–]PsyMonk-0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

This needs to be side-barred.... PUT IT IN THE SIDE BAR!!! T_T

[–]SPREAD_THE_LOVE_77910 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy Link

Maybe I'm learning more than I thought because I never say these faggy things. I do hold the door for people, but I do it for guys and girls.

[–]m0rphing0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

That's just common courtesy and is fine because you're not doing it to try to get a woman to like you. But if you ever find yourself seeing a hottie and getting the urge to hold the door as a favor to get in her good graces, you've gone wrong and need to check yourself.

[–]Trooper_18680 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Ladies first!

Don't see the problem with this, as long as you dont behave like a cuck. I remember a friend and 1, held the door for these two girls once, two seperate doors. We didnt go out of our way, but these two chicks just walked past the doors like it was their birthright. They were surprised when we said "your welcome" loudly.

But this was an extreme case. The key is for women to see you dont open doors (keep them open for the next person as you walk into them) for just women. I do it for everyone, regardless of age, gender, etc.

If you open a door for another human being, its fine. If you do it whilst behaving like a beta cuck, then that is a problem.

[–]boom_bostic0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

What about "did you cum?" or "did you really cum or were you just faking it?"

[–]JYandeau0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah a few of these are bullshit. Holding the door for a woman isint beta lmao, in-fact it’s the complete opposite. My girl fucking loves it when I hold the door & smack her ass on the way in. It’s not beta to be a gentleman. Most of the other shits correct though.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Have you ever said "I love you" to your mother, sister or grandmother?

Maybe you should. If you don't have any of these people in your life... I don't know. I don't know.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

So I understand how these questions make men appear very weak & beta...I typically avoid most of them, but you made a lot of good points I catch myself still doing. My question is, what are some good discussion topics when you are first getting to know a hot young woman? I'm an INTJ so I know I have almost borderline austim when it comes to talking to women, but I could provide very in-depth explanations to anyone else about the laws of thermodynamics or quantum physics. I know you are supposed to talk to women like they are children, but what about? Their pets? Their friends? Their next vacation? What get's their vagina's tingling?

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yeah...

I dunno, is this considered good content here? I imagine a lot of different opinions- some difficulties I have with this stuff in order of importance.

Not changing a girls tire for her? There are two very different scenarios; 1. This girl is driving you somewhere and get's a flat tire. You have got to be kidding me if you think it's acceptable to let this little doll struggle with changing a tire or calling a company to do it when I am in the passenger seat as a fully capable man of having that thing changed in 15 minutes. I might show her how to do it. No big deal at all. Roll up your sleeves, she'll be wet by the time I'm done with it. Least resistance and we are on with the day. However, 2. If she got a flat somewhere else and calls you to go out of the way- this is a big time test for sure and I've seen some people make good suggestions.

Things that are hilarious and flirty that WORK for me. Tell a GORGEOUS woman, the first words out of your mouth, "I love you" and then proceed to make her realize you are completely just teasing, having fun and definitely would or would not consider banging her.

Calling a woman beautiful is just a good thing to do with my day. Women love this... I can't even count on two hands how many panties this has dropped me. What in the hell is wrong with you? This gives the woman no power if you frame it from the perspective that beauty is cool, nice... but really, it's everywhere and it's been had many times before.

[–]aShiftyLad0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

"You hurt my feeling" (note only one feeling)

This one is great to use if you are being sarcastic and giving her shit, just don't actually say it emotionally or wanting some form of validation

This entire list is things you can use ironically/flipping frame when flirting.

solid list (also just noticed the edit at the bottom)

[–]JohnKway0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

How many guys have you been with?: Are you insecure she'll compare you?

N count?

[–]Zormut0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

That was pretty damn hilarious. But I've got to say that I did some of these myself. Damn.

[–]Thunderfin0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Nice list, some stuff I disagree with though, such as "I love you".

[–]Naderlande 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

You forgot any variation of:

"I'm sorry"

[–]BrownGummyBear0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy Link

What if you're Canadian though

[–]Naderlande 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

Then you say

"Cut a nigga some slack, eh?"

[–]CaesarsInferno0 points1 point  (7 children) | Copy Link

I’m planning on subscribing to TRP but because I’m on mobile right now and this only came up in my random feed... what would you say in lieu of “can I take you out some time”

[–]Rp9971 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

You usually just say "let's do x". Assume she wants to hang out with you, don't ask for her permission.

[–]BrownGummyBear1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

"I'd like to hang with you" sets date for when

[–]CaesarsInferno0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Yea I like that. Subtle but meaningful difference in phrasing. Nice.

[–]m0rphing-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Sounds gay to me. "I'm gonna do x, and it's cool for you to come."

[–]BrownGummyBear1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Telling a girl you'd like to hang with her sounds "gay"? OK MATE

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

mention something fun you'd be doing with or without her. Don't make it sound like your having fun is dependent on her agreeing to come along. I always phrase it as if I'm going there anyway. For example:

"I'm going to X this weekend, you should come, it'll be fun"

"Let's hang out soon, I was thinking of doing x"

[–]GOD_MASTER_KING0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Fuck I’m guilty of the first two. My question is this, what if we have a very large amount of disposable income ? I’m very well off, so should I not use that card on occasion ? It’s not that I need to, but more so want to. Living lavished is a privilege, so why not use that to sway her more in your favor ? Great post though, saving it. Thanks

[–]Maple_Beard1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

If you’re looking for something to do with your money I could use some.

If you’re waving around stacks of cash she’ll be interested sure, she’ll come on your boat and post Instagram pics then she’ll text some guy who works at McDonalds and ignores her pleas for attention and say “can I come over Daddy?”

[–]whatifitsfun 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

What about shit that seems bad but is actually good, like dirty talk?

[–]Cool_Mob 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

Congruent list.

Also just a note,always compliment the guy/bf to grill. She's lucky to have him not reverse. Then go on overblowing it,she will most likely retatilate and try one up the guy. Then bring in " It's not that this guy doesn't love you. Its that he loves you too much, and just can't handle it. He's not emotionally available, and because he knows that you're the best he's ever had, he can't handle all of these things that he's going through emotionally. All his life he probably wasn't very good with women, and women weren't interested in him.. So now that he's got this girl, he doesn't know how to handle it.". See the script flip? hellishly effective.

[–]Maple_Beard1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This works, to the point that it’s nearly sickening.

Defend him, in a way that makes him look like an overly emotional BP Beta. Even if he’s not she’ll start thinking he is.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy Link

Somewhat disagree with that one : "Ladies first!: Fuck this, I hate this try-hard "chivalry" more than anything, I once had a sad white-knight chump try to lecture me on how to treat a certain "lady" because I was busting her balls. Please never say these words. Don't open doors for her and don't let her go in line before you, and don't give up your seat on the bus unless she's old or disabled."

[–]lawlyer12160 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

“It makes me feel anxious when...”

Then again, that line is exactly what got me here in the first place. She dried up instantly.

[–]Einzakin0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is an incredibly lame post, as if none of these could be used in situations. Are you 12?

[–]Epictetus20170 points1 point  (7 children) | Copy Link

Opinions on compliments about her body during sex? Would that be an exception to the OPs view on beauty and pedestals?

Example: "You have a great ass." (While using it appropriately.)

I have found women love compliments about their beauty in bed, but I am willing to hear other opinions. Still working on GFTOW.

[–]Davidskylarkk5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

I will throw out some outlandish compliments. I have told women they have the prettiest asshole I have ever seen. Things they think are ugly are the best compliments in bed or out. Freckles, over bites, scars, etc. are like compliment crack to women...

[–]1empatheticapathetic3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy Link

I've read before that they love it but you reveal a lower SMV to them by complimenting them at all. It puts you in admirer league (she's the best you've done) instead of superior league (he's probably had better chicks than me).

[–]BullshittingNonsense1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy Link

The best thing you can do is punch her in the face and call her ugly though, then she'll REALLY know you've had better chicks than her.

[–]1empatheticapathetic-3 points-2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

How has it worked out for you so far Chad.

[–]rpMadler0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy Link

Make it an "I" statement to indicate that her ass only has value when you're appreciating it. For example, "I love the way your ass looks when I'm fucking you from behind" or whatever.

[–]NitricTV-1 points0 points  (1 child) | Copy Link

Question how do you feel about "You might be/kinda my type." it's the same as your gorgeous right?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It depends on the situation. "You might be/kinda my type." is okay if you say it AFTER she gave you some IOIs, it's like you find her behavior/attitude/personality cute.

[–]sebmapleane 1 points1 points [recovered] | Copy Link

I wouldn't say any of the dumb shit people on this sub say

[–]Do not send modmail to my personal inboxCrazyHorseInvincible[M] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

Okay, so you don't like it here. Allow me to help you resist the temptation to stay.

[–]be-ay-be-why-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

This is actually a very thorough and helpful post. The specific lines that betas say and a TRP perspective on them could make this a side bar item in my opinion.

[–]BlakTheory-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

It makes sense why red pill is opposite of blue pill.

[–]Davidskylarkk-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy Link

So what you're saying is, we shouldn't pay attention to small details and to literally copy what this von something dude does?

This is great advice for beginners! You're a star dude.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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