"Quit looking at her Instagram, she knows when you're looking."
"Stop giving her attention."
"Act like she doesn't exist. Ignore her. Don't look at her Facebook. Don't talk to her friends. Stop talking to her."
"When she finally realizes that she wants you, that she made a mistake, you won't want her anymore."
-My father, the Boomerang, because he'd always bounce back.
My love life had always been a weird one. If not for my father's advice, I'd have been a dead-to-rights incel. His wisdom and RP-esque advice would carry me throughout my young life. I was pulling HB7s and 8s when I had no business pulling anything greater than a 5.
We'd have long talks that stretched into the night.
"How do I get her to like me, dad?"
"Stop opening your mouth. They think you're attractive until you say something to change their mind."
And on, and on, and on...
When my dad became sick, the advice stopped. He was fighting for his life now. He didn't have time to indulge my oneitis.
Shortly after, I stumbled upon TRP.
The question on my mind-
"How do I get this girl to love me?"
Whilst my dad struggled to live, that's all I could think about. The first thing I'd think about in the morning and the last thing I'd think about at night.
"She likes abs? I'll get abs then." -Keto and fasting.
"She likes muscles? I'll get muscles then." -Started lifting.
"She likes bad boys? I'll become a badass, then." -went to the MMA gym everyday.
But it was never enough. It felt like she could see right through me.
I'd share the TRP wisdom with my coworkers. Do this! Do that! You have the value, not her! She'll only respect you if you deserve respect! Like a parrot, I'd explain all the theories to them, whilst internalizing none of it.
One day, I was called out by that same co-worker-
"Until I see you with a woman, I'm not gonna bother listening to anymore of your shit."
I was stunned. The theories were sound! How could he not see that!?
I was a fool.
I saw my oneitis for the last time. I went to her place of work. I had followed my dad's advice and ignored her.
She saw me and came up to me with a big smile.
"Hey you! Don't ignore me, don't give me that look! Talk to me!"
"Whats up, bud."
"I'm just waiting for my ride, my ex bf who cheated on me with his baby momma smashed my windows in on my car, so my homeboy is fixing it."
"Yeah, so what's up with you?"
"Oh, well... Guess what? I'm pregnant."
Just like that, my frame shattered.
Later that night, I went to my dad, enraged. Yelling, almost frothing at the mouth. The girl I loved! Pregnant! I threw things around our shitty trailer.
"I told you to ignore her son, but you didn't listen. I told you everything you needed to do to get her, and you listened to none of it. Now you're upset that your precious angel got knocked up by a gangster's dick. Get over her, already."
I pushed him, my fist clenched-
"Fuck you, Dad!"
-before I collapsed, sobbing in the corner of our shitty shack in the backyard. My dad came over and hugged me.
"I'm sorry, dad. I'm sorry! I just loved her so much! I did all the things I was supposed to do, and she didn't fall in love with me!"
"She was never going to love you, son."
"She was the lesson in your life, a stepping stone. You wouldn't have done everything you needed to do to be a better man if you hadn't met her. Now it's time to let her go."
"If she truly loved you, she wouldn't put you through this much pain."
"The truth is, son, she doesn't deserve a man as good as you. Not anymore."
And just like that, a message clear as day ran through my mind-
Don't you deserve better than this? Don't you deserve respect?
Those who can't give up anything, cannot change anything.
Progress demands sacrifice.
Your new life demands that your past life be brought to the altar for sacrifice.
A warrior must face the consequences of his actions.
Your oneitis will never see the new you as genuine. To complete your transformation, she must always remain as the one you failed to obtain.
Otherwise, all the pain, all the progress you made, will be for nothing.
The weakling in you will always cling to the dream of you and her, together.
The only way to kill the weakness in your heart is to kill the dream, and accept the ugly reality. This is the final test, don't fail now. The people who don't agree with the new you must be left behind, it's up to them if they stay in your life.
A coward dies many times, a man dies only once.
Don't be a coward anymore, let the past go.
The reality was that you were too weak.
The truth was you deserved what you got: nothing.
The only way to own your future, is to own your past.
Advertise yourself properly, so that the people you're meant to have in your life recognize you. If all they see is a weakling, they'll pass you up, figuring that's who you really are.
There's a story about Vikings entering into Valhalla. The guardians knew who belonged and who did not.
Weaklings would attempt to sneak in, hiding their footsteps, because in their hearts they knew they were cowards.
True warriors walked right into Valhalla, with straight backs, loud and firm steps, head held high. There was no question in their mind that they belonged.
Make sure you're never that weakling again. Make sure it's clear as day for everyone to see what kind of man you are.