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Blue Pill Example

Still Wanna Get Married?

(self.TheRedPill)

submitted by TRP VanguardWhisper

From elsewhere on reddit:

Not at all. My wife took our baby when she dyed her hair blue and fell in with a crowd of regs feminists that work with her at Starbucks. She moved back in with her mom, stopped working, and hit me up for child support. They set my CS at the highest earnings I've ever made in my life - a single month during my time owning a janitorial business - , pre tax, 40%. So, that one single month (I had got a contract to clean up a demolished building that paid $4000), I made $6000. Luckily, in Texas, there's a cap at a little over $1000 a month. Problem is, I make $600 every two weeks.

I didn't cheat. I didn't flake. I was supportive, loving, and if I might say so, a good husband. She cheated on me while pregnant with our child, took off while I was at work, no notice, and filed a restraining order which I later found out all lawyers MUST advise their clients of, because it means a MUCH higher rate of achieving custody. That shows up on my background check.

I'm genuinely going to kill myself soon, because I have about two months of savings left with which I can pay my CS, and after that, for each payment missed, it's a court date, with a 180 day jail sentence. Why did all of this happen? So she could find herself. Because she's a strong independent waman who don't need no man. <--- that sentence would have never, ever come out of me before she left.

That's not the half of it, either. I won't bore you with details, but just a few highlights are:

Legal Aid place said their free help for poor people was "more for women".

The state provides free attorneys for women but not men in custody and CS cases.

95% of all custody cases are awarded to women in my state.

This one's the worst of them all, to me: After all of this, I am, in most of society's eyes, a deadbeat dad.

No, this one's the worst: They arbitrated CS from out of state for my wife, so she didn't even have to show up to the court date, but they won't do that for custody. I still haven't even seen my daughter. I learned her name (went from a classic "Julia" to "Aaliahya"..) when the policewoman served me CS papers and treated me like I was trash.

My wife, unemployed, living with mom, gets nothing but help and positivity and support. I'm a monster.

So, that's the story of how I die, apparently.

EDIT: wwell fuck I'm sitting here crying for the first time in.. I don't know.. I can't begin to tell you guys all how much this means to me. I've been living with this huge knot in my chest for close to 2 years and haven't told a soul because I was sure they'd call me weak or not a man or whatever I thought. Just thank you. Thank you thank you thank you, all of you, so much. I promise this to each and every one of you guys: I will document this all. I will make a video detailing all of this, and I'll try to get in contact with some of the people which some of you guys have told me would be interested in the story. I'll plea my case in court before I commit to anything, and like one guy said, maybe jail isn't that bad.

Still wanna get married?

Still wanna bet "your life and everything in it" on the turn of a card in order to win "she gets a ring and a princess party, and you keep the relationship you have now"?

How many more corpses do you need to see?


[–]XLNC- 523 points524 points  (35 children)

That poor, poor man. This was a very expensive lesson he’ll learn from for the rest of his life. Marriage is a rigged game and the only winning move is to not participate.

[–]FlagranteDerelicto 65 points66 points  (14 children)

If he does actually decide that it’s hopeless and commit suicide, he should self immolate on the courthouse steps like those Buddhist monks during the Vietnam war. And detail what led to his end in a letter to the local newspaper.

[–][deleted] 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Self immolation is pretty fucking painful

[–]SSaturnV 23 points24 points  (4 children)

Fun fact, a veteran did this outside the VA recently.

Did you hear about it?

[–]FlagranteDerelicto 30 points31 points  (3 children)

I haven’t heard anything about this and I read the news constantly.

Kinda proves my point of how corporate media realizes that the entire world economy is based on the American economy and that the system is much more fragile than the public realizes. They’re terrified of these stories depicting symbolic acts by people with nothing left to lose.

A few years ago a man crashed an airplane into a regional IRS office in Texas. His suicide note made it clear that this was intentional. Coverage at the time was minimal and now most people are unaware that it ever happened.

EDIT: Makes you realize that extensive coverage of school shooters including delving into their backgrounds has a purpose. Law enforcement always says that the way to discourage them is to limit the posthumous publicity they receive but the media fixates on it because it moves us closer to eliminating gun rights.

[–]Docbear64 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Is it an attempt to reduce gun rights or to promote gun sales? I see both sides of the coin but I firmly believe if american has a nationally recognized religion then it is the religion of consumerism they'll tell us anything to make sure we keep spending .

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Gun sales do go up in the wake of shootings, as you would expect. But the purpose of selective media coverage of tragedies is to steer the nation towards gun control.

Gun laws are usually enforced retroactively, so your newly-purchased AR-15 can be made illegal only months later. As long as the public can be brainwashed into accepting unconstitutional gun control laws, they will surrender their rights willingly, and that brainwashing is achieved piecemeal.

[–]acidicbitchdotcom 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I started working in that office park shortly after that happened. What a weird thing.

[–]Ieatlinner 7 points8 points  (2 children)

If you really want to get your point across, self immolation seems like a pretty powerful way to do it.

People would think "Jesus, what is he protesting that he literally lit himself on fire?"

But he would't be able to answer.

Instead, I suggest taking a hammer to your own nut. Go in the middle of MSG or in this case the courthouse steps, pull out a nut, and pop it like a paintball. People will listen then.

[–]FlagranteDerelicto 3 points4 points  (1 child)

His answer would be in the letter sent to the local press. A man lighting himself on fire is a powerful symbol of resistance to oppression. That’s what kickstarted the Arab Spring in Tunisia.

Every time an American does it the only coverage is a tiny blurb that never delves into the cause. The media conglomerates ensure minimal coverage because they’re terrified of the power of that symbolic act to inspire action in the masses.

[–]friendandadvisor 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. In the late 70s, early 80s, whenever tf, some dude lit himself over the Panama Canal Treaty, turning it back over to Panama. It was a one inch article. No pics.

I think that there was one in a Manosphere protest of treatment of men, where the immolatee said that there was a 'second set of books.'

NO public interest.

The Arab Spring thing was, IMHO, a Deep State action. So.......if I am right, don't go torching yourself unless John Brennan gives you the OK.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

And detail what led to his end in a letter to the local newspaper.

Why? so they could run this headline?

"Toxic Masculinity claims another male life as the patriarchy leaves another helpless Woman and Child alone without support because men are encouraged to repress their emotions"

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just for interest sake, but "immolation" doesn't imply setting oneself on fire. Immolation simply means ritual killing or sacrificing and it can be done by any means, not just burning. I am telling you this because I also always thought it meant being lit on fire and burning to death and only found it doesn't a short while ago.

[–]Gozsayin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not saying he should do this but if he was gonna do it this would help the cause

[–]Quaboag413 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Remember Thomas James Ball

[–]SovereignSoul76 0 points1 point  (0 children)

His name was Tom Ball.

"He was angry at the state child protection bureaucracy and the courts after a ten-year battle over a child abuse charge that became, for him, a Kafkaesque struggle with cruel authority."

https://freekeene.com/2011/06/16/thomas-james-ball-self-immolated-in-protest-of-the-justice-system/

You can actually download his final statement from the website. As expected, it is clear, well written, and factual. Just a man pushed too far.

[–]heelek 77 points78 points  (2 children)

I would call it more a not-losing move.

[–][deleted] 12 points13 points  (1 child)

Nobody wins in a society where matrimonial partnerships are impossible, and NO I do not mean the legal entity impersonating marriage as sponsored and promoted by the state.

[–]kagetsuki32 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We just need to legalise surrogacy.

[–]Broder45 30 points31 points  (4 children)

Serious question, would he be able to leave the country and start over elsewhere? I truly hope he doesn't give up on himself because there can be a way for his life to turn around and I hope it does for him.

I mean.. he could just do the classic coke and hookers in Mexico and maybe he'll see life isn't that bad after all..

https://totalfratmove.com/guy-goes-to-mexico-to-kill-himself-spends-week-doing-coke-and-banging-hookers-decides-to-keep-living/

[–]_penseroso_ 16 points17 points  (0 children)

His only real choice. Leaving behind friends and family is a serious kick in the teeth, but it’s his only real option other than death.

I always tell seriously suicidal people to pick a small bag and leave it all behind, preferably to somewhere warm. Wherever you end up will feel like you died and were reborn.

[–]mrcooliest 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Id rather put a bullet in my head than go to mexico to potentially have my head sawed off.

[–]Etrangehumanoide 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He don't spoil the fun gringo !

[–]Millixaw 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Child custody payments can go after unmarried guys as well.

[–]circedgirlsarecleanr 7 points8 points  (1 child)

That poor, poor man.

You gotta stop feeling sorry for the chumps. They're normally the white knight clowns that will shoot you down before they get hit with something like this. And most will still remain that way till they get hit a few more times.

[–]cakemuncher 0 points1 point  (5 children)

That's what I always believed as well... But idk, I'm 28 now and my thoughts are changing. Marriage has a sentimental value that can't be measured. My parents are happily married for 40 years now. I have friends that got married that I just don't see it any other way.

IMO those failed marriages happen because either they get married just to get married or they simply don't know how find a good partner.

I have been with my girl for 3 years. I wouldn't take 1 day back. She actually keeps asking me to get married to her but so far my answer has been no just because of my red pill beliefs. This might change because my perspective of the world is changing as well.

[–]Razor_Point 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Your marriage ultimatum will hit you within 1 - 2 years time max.

Best to read OP's post over and over again until you inevitably realize what you will need to do.

[–]cakemuncher 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's fine. I'll reevaluate then. It's not the first girl to ask for marriage. Those girls are in my past now.

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Your opinion is ill-informed, wrong, and stupid.

Please present to the community one meaningful, tangible benefit you get from marriage, apart from a meager tax break.

[–]cakemuncher 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Why are you such a dick? I'm in agreement that marriage is useless. My belief is that if we love each other we would stay together regardless of a damn paper from the government. I was just saying that I might let that belief go because I don't see the harm in it from seeing people I personally know who are happy in their marriages. And I know those people on a very personal level that the wife and husband both share their troubles with me and in general they're quit happy. I don't care about the tax break. That doesn't save much anyway. Yeah I know bad shit happens to people because of marriage but it doesn't happen to everyone and if you love someone you should be making sacrifices and taking chances as much they are.

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was just saying that I might let that belief go because I don't see the harm in it

If you don't see the harm in it, then you're either illiterate, haven't been reading the sidebar, or you're an idiot. Regardless of which of those three it is, you have no business speaking on this issue. Your opinions and your feelings are stupid and wrong.

I'm a dick to protect newcomers from gullible idealists like you.

I've asked that the moderators ban you temporarily while you take some time to review the basic theory readings. Whether you see this as a favour or as an insult will say a lot about you and your readiness to be a part of this community.

[–][deleted] 416 points417 points  (31 children)

I am a businessman, albeit with little experience. I have a proposition for you.

I think you and I should go into business together. This will offer us a few tax breaks, and also make our families happy as they will see us as "official" lifelong business partners. It will also make God happy. We can even post pictures on social media and announce our partnership to everyone we know, and gather great praise from others as a result.


Please be sure, however, to read the fine print!


The ironclad contract you will be signing states that, at any time, I maintain the right to terminate our partnership for any reason, without warning. If, during our years in business, I work very little and earn hardly anything, whereas you work tirelessly and accumulate very large amounts of wealth, you will guarantee me no less than 50% of all of your earnings, to be paid via lump sum.

On top of that, you will also agree to pay to me a monthly sum, the amount to be determined by a lawyer in court who will not have your best interests in mind.

Aforementioned monthly payment, by the way, will last for as long as I live.

Sound good? Fantastic! Dont worry - you and I will last for life. I can feel it. I just know.

We'll set the ceremony date for next year. Oh, and to become partners in the first place, we will need to spend at least $10,000 on the ceremony itself, and a few additional thousand for diamond and gold pins, to be worn on our clothing at all times for as long as we remain partners.

Sign the dotted line, please.

[–]usernamegoeshere17 105 points106 points  (20 children)

Damn, if someone had put it in those terms for me I never would have done it. Marriage ended in divorce in January and I'm fucked almost as bad as the OP.

[–]Voctr 39 points40 points  (14 children)

If your life is ruined like this, can't you just flee from the US? It's not great but sure beats killing yourself.

[–]Ballosaurus 1 points1 points [recovered]

If you want any hope of returning, taxes and child support are still due.

Unless you want to renounce citizenship completely, which I'm told is actually quite difficult.

[–]1Your_Coke_Dealer 20 points21 points  (6 children)

Renouncing citizenship is easy. But it’s highly discouraged and risky because you could very well wind up stateless and with no legal protection. The hard part is becoming a citizen elsewhere.

[–]juliusstreicher 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Renounce citizenship, go to California, get child supported

[–]WholesomeAwesome 1 point2 points  (4 children)

probably cheaper to just be a permanent traveler

[–]1Your_Coke_Dealer 0 points1 point  (3 children)

That would still require you pay taxes and child support/alimony

[–]WholesomeAwesome 2 points3 points  (2 children)

madness. the whole point of being a permanent traveler is you stay out of extraditive countries and are never eligible for taxation.

[–]1Your_Coke_Dealer 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Death and taxes, man. And if I were to make a bet, the IRS would catch you faster than the grim reaper

[–]WholesomeAwesome 2 points3 points  (0 children)

whatever man stay in the matrix and tell everyone about your learned helplessness regarding it

[–]Voctr 8 points9 points  (3 children)

I'm thinking that in this situation there is no chance and hope to return ever again. Probably best to disappear of the earth completely and start a new life elsewhere. I'm sure it would be difficult but if you have no choice?

[–]Ballosaurus 1 points1 points [recovered]

start a new life elsewhere

The thing about people who run from their problems, they tend to find the same problems wherever they run to.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would probably try to get into a life of crime. You would already be a criminal in the eyes of society.

[–]usernamegoeshere17 0 points1 point  (1 child)

When you're barely above the poverty line, CS sucks, especially when the state wants 1/4 of what you make. Not sure about everyone else who has a middle class job, but when you're barely making it on $15 an hour, 25% of that is a lot

[–]Voctr 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's basically theft, taking 1/4th of barely anything. It's insane how these family courts can get away with it.

I don't know your situation and how willing you are but consider it. Flights aren't so expensive anymore these days and inside Europe there are a lot of opportunities to live on little money. Could always teach English somewhere or get lucky and use whatever it is you trained for. If you're desperate enough there are plenty of ways is all I'm saying.

[–]TheBlackAlistar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just paddle board into the atlantic

[–]DerpHernandez 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The best thing I've seen for a divorce is making sure that your wife is chasing their "newfound love" and will happily take some money and run to get it over with ASAP.

Yes, dude was even paying for hotel rooms for them to fuck in.

I didn't get it at the time. I do now.

[–]RandyBumgardner85 33 points34 points  (1 child)

This is a fucking great post. I explain it to people using the analogy of friendship:

"So we've been mates for a few years now. I think it's time we signed this contract that says we pool all our assets and if we ever stop being mates we split everything 50/50. Also if one of us can't be bothered to work the other must support him for life. Now I know you are a hard worker, have a promising career and have saved a shit ton of money and I'm a useless layabout who couldn't be bothered to find a decent career and spends all his money on shit but we're friends right so that shouldn't matter. If you won't sign this contract I can't accept that you actually like me and I will go find another best friend."

Only a man with severe learning difficulties would agree to something like this. But swap "friends" for "lovers" and one man for a woman and all off a sudden 90% of men are chomping at the bit.

The stupidity of humanity knows no bounds.

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Such is the power of the male sex drive.

That's why we teach men the tools they need to get laid on the regular, easily, and for free. So they can regain their mental faculties from time to time and live lives which are the product of rational calculation and not reactionary spasms in pursuit of sex.

[–]Whitified 13 points14 points  (0 children)

now slap the word 'MARRIAGE' on top and millions of men sign up

[–]RedPillRobin 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Before I got married I knew this but for some reason I went along to get a long. Now I'm paying my fat ex wife $722 a month and all taxes due on that $722 which rounds out at $1000 a month. This is for a kid I barely see and have to fight to see. They tell me child support and custody are 2 separate issues when I complain. That's what the women who run domestic relations tell me. One time I over paid the bitch $3000 when I asked for credit I was litteraly laughed at. Hell of a deal there.

[–]TRP VanguardWhisper[S] 6 points7 points  (1 child)

+1

[–]modTheRedPike 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Done

[–]U-94 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I read this in George Carlin's voice.

[–]epictetus_irl 654 points655 points  (63 children)

I had three opportunities to get married in my 20s. Three different LTRs putting the pressure on over the course of ten years.

I declined the opportunity each time which led to the end of the relationship each time.

Still the best three decisions I’ve ever made.

Don’t gamble your livelihood and potentially your actual life out of fear of being alone.

The alternative is worse.

Ever married male friend I have? “Miserable.” “Trapped. “ “Made a mistake.” “Staying for the kids.”

One life gentlemen. Don’t fucking waste it.

[–][deleted] 265 points266 points  (6 children)

Marriage was a contract in past times. Now it's a fraudulent contract, with responsibilities and duties only on one of the 2 parties.

Only socio-cultural programming makes men still want/agree to take on it.

[–]tanlkula 25 points26 points  (2 children)

Socio-cultural programming is a sole reason for TRP's birth. Its good that more men are aware of the consequences of this blue-precept moms teach their boys.

[–]Scymnus 23 points24 points  (1 child)

moms teach their boys

I had a discussion with my mom and grandma about getting married. Told them to give me one good reason to do it, they said I would get a woman who would cook and clean for me. When I told them women aren't interested in doing those things anymore because they're all strong independent women now, they shut up real fast.

[–]theaspiringasshole 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If she ain't like June Cleaver, Then you sure don't need her.

[–]circedgirlsarecleanr 16 points17 points  (1 child)

Only socio-cultural programming

Most don't have enough options. The average guy is likely to feel a strong 'connection' with the first hoe that comes his way.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah. Also, he isn't inclined to inform himself about such stuff before he's encountered serious problems and grief. Totally right — and I was the average guy too.

[–]redd_reality 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Don’t gamble your livelihood and potentially your actual life out of fear of being alone.

The entire marriage idea stems from a man's inability to realize the obvious. It is only his fear, nurtured by his woman to involve the state, which compels him to get married.

If he steps back, he'd see that the relationship was held up by absolutely nothing more than his performance in the smv arena. An arena which devalues the man who shackles himself like a fool to the whims of a woman.

Side story: I've been getting a high rate of flakes lately on tinder. Granted, these are smoke show 20 year olds. But, sitting back yesterday thinking about how a girl can go from spilling her guts, absolutely enthralled to meet and experience me, then two hours later, ghost before the meet up, shows how most women lack even the faintest scrap of integrity.

These are THE EXACT SAME WOMEN who will desperately try and lock you down with the marriage card, come 28 and the impending shadow of the wall. The thing is, nothing has changed, her integrity is still nil.

Integrity is a value which you either live by, or don't live by to whichever degree you choose, regardless of the situation or outcome. If she is a 9 at 20 years old or a 7 at 28 years old, although her value has fluctuated greatly, her integrity will remain unchanged. She will always be as unreliable as she was in her younger years.

Smv is the only thing that matters - marriage contracts are for fucking idiots who can't see past their own emotions.

[–]Denver_Luv3 1 points1 points [recovered]

Don’t gamble your livelihood and potentially your actual life out of fear of being alone.

I have a tag on blog, don't get married, filled with the horror stories and the abstract reasoning.

Readers ask, "Why are you repeating yourself so much? We get it."

I reply, "I will stop when guys stop agreeing to marry."

[–]1jb_trp 11 points12 points  (13 children)

It's always funny to me (funny-sad, not funny-haha) when guys get overly upset or hung up on an LTR that doesn't work out. Like, when you're just dating, you're just hanging out, having fun, and hooking up. It should be easy, right? Like, you're just going out for drinks, maybe taking a vacation, having sex, and doing easy, fun shit.

But then it goes sideways. She starts acting bitchy. Or becomes distant and is losing interest. Whatever... And so the relationship ends.

But why do some dudes get so hung up on it? What's the alternative? You going to get married, buy a house, have kids, etc? That stuff is the hard stuff. Life isn't going to get better and more fun or easier when you do those things. And if it isn't good enough now, there's no way it's going to be better when you're doing all the hard stuff, and it's not just vacations and drinks and sex... It's crying children, mortgage payments, no vacations, and a dead bedroom... Then they leave and take half your stuff (or more), and find a new sucker to fuck them until they get bored, and they try to take half of their stuff... Rinse and repeat.

[–]Docbear64 13 points14 points  (10 children)

It's that old saying right :

That’s the trouble about marriage. Women always hope it’s going to change the husband. Men always hope it won’t change their wives—and both are disappointed!

Men marry hoping to salvage / perfectly preserve that early honeymoon phase and the woman his wife is at the beginning of the relationship .

They don't get that THAT period is the golden period , very very very few relationships get better from that point so when shit starts going south don't desperately grasp to keep it , allow yourself to go find someone new and create those feelings there.

[–]1jb_trp 13 points14 points  (9 children)

And if your marriage is not going well... Just have another kid! /s

I have a female coworker that is in her mid-30s. She and her husband divorced a few years ago, but got back together. Then they had another kid about a year and a half ago (so now they have 4 children, one of them has autism).

And now? She wants to separate from him. They got together when they were in their early 20s... And even got back together. He doesn't want to lose her or the kids, and they even bought a house together. But... She needs to "find herself" and claims she "never has felt those feelings she wants to feel." The fucking hell? This woman is going to screw over her children's well-being just to chase some feelings?

I don't think she understands she's playing a sucker's game. No self-respecting man is going to want to date/marry an average looking woman in her mid 30s with 4 kids who left her husband to "find herself." The high-value male she is imagining in her head is too busy banging women 10-15 years younger than her with no baggage or children.

[–]Docbear64 5 points6 points  (7 children)

I promise all of them watch romantic movies, read romance novels , and listen to love songs, and think that the goal is to achieve something that the song perfectly describes 1000% of the time .

It's like teenage girl imaginations on overdrive no matter how old they get. She's going to divorce him , hop on Tinder for a while, If she's halfway attractive possibly meet a Chad who fucks her for a few months, and then when he dumps her she'll be right back on hubbys doorstep .

I can accept that women are shitty but these men who refuse to grab their balls and let these bitches die alone infuriate me . She's fucked you over and abandoned your relationship twice and yet these dudes just wait in the wings for the women to return .

It bothers the shit out of me.

[–]1jb_trp 11 points12 points  (3 children)

all of them watch romantic movies, read romance novels , and listen to love songs, and think that the goal is to achieve something that the song perfectly describes 1000% of the time .

You're describing my last relationship to a T. We were only together a few months, and we were just having fun dates, I was taking her outside and teaching her how to rock climb, and we bought tickets to go on vacation together... I mean, it should have been good. But somewhere along the way, BAM, it was like nothing was good enough for her. It was like she needed to feel these crazy strong feelings all the time and she couldn't be content with the normalcy of life.

And me? I'm not going to spin my wheels trying to make some chick feel all these feelings. If she's not happy with me, there's the door. There's always another young fit chick to take climbing with me and keep me warm at night...

[–]Senior ContributorSkorchZang 13 points14 points  (1 child)

When they get that way, it's time to strategically vanish from her life for a time. It's a true saying that time and distance makes loves grow fonder, too much familiarity and comfort ("he loves me, he's not going anywhere") is the death of romance.

[–]dbnuh 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No doubt. I got burned by this recently. This 22 year old girl in 2016 fell for me hard. She was all over me, and for months I paid her little attention. Finally, when it went down, we were inseparable for months, and I thought she was "different than other girls" and that maybe I could spend a ton of time and have an unhealthy amount of familiarity and comfort with her, and she truly wouldn't be like other women and get turned off by that.

Obviously we know what happened. She got turned off by too much of a good thing, and too much familiarity breeds contempt, and she started losing interest.

All of this was predictable, but I got too caught up in wanting that validation.

Lesson learned.

[–]Docbear64 8 points9 points  (0 children)

There's always another young fit chick to take climbing with me and keep me warm at night...

When I was a younger and fat I didn't believe this , I felt like there was no way a fit older guy could get laid more than a guy who was younger. I've been focusing on my body and health , working to get healthier , and every year I get older ,stronger, and more fit it seems like I capture more of the attention of women younger than me . I have more 24 year olds interested in me now than I had when I was 24 years old and younger.

You said it perfectly, there is always another one spend time with .

[–]dbnuh 1 point2 points  (2 children)

[–]Docbear64 4 points 5 days ago I promise all of them watch romantic movies, read romance novels , and listen to love songs, and think that the goal is to achieve something that the song perfectly describes 1000% of the time. It's like teenage girl imaginations on overdrive no matter how old they get.

Yep. I dated a 29 year old girl for 3 weeks that was upset because I was on a fucking vacation out of the country and she felt like she wasn't being "treated like a princess" and "that even a lot of texts of appreciation" would be something she expected, even with me out of the country.

This chick actually thought she was a princess in a Disney movie and in other aspects of life she seemed quite grounded and not crazy.

Needless to say I ended that.

[–]Docbear64 2 points3 points  (1 child)

lol Good shit , if she was that much of a princess when you were on a fucking vacation can you imagine what she'd be like at the altar during the the official "her Day" marriage princess celebration ? Her betabux better be rich.

[–]dbnuh 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Exactly. Not only was I on vacation but I was at the bottom of a giant mountain in a tent with little to no cell service, and this bitch was talking about how "I wasn't calling her daily."

if she was that much of a princess when you were on a fucking vacation can you imagine what she'd be like at the altar during the the official "her Day" marriage princess celebration ?

I don't even wanna think about it brother.

[–]dbnuh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't think she understands she's playing a sucker's game. No self-respecting man is going to want to date/marry an average looking woman in her mid 30s with 4 kids who left her husband to "find herself." The high-value male she is imagining in her head is too busy banging women 10-15 years younger than her with no baggage or children.

Yep. I dated a single mother once and I'll never do it again. It never got to the point where she wanted me to meet the kid, but there were just so many red flags that it was a bad idea to get into a LTR with her.

[–]U-94 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Women show their bitchy attitude months into any relationship. Not sure how one could stay poker faced in 'fun gf mode' for months or years just to snag a husband. With my last gf, after the first fight, i was like FUCK THIS BEING PERMANENT and I strategized a way out from there.

[–]dbnuh 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But why do some dudes get so hung up on it? What's the alternative?

I just think it's like withdrawal from stimulates. Sudden lack of dopamine and serotonin. I think that's a huge factor in why people get so hung up and upset when a LTR ends before the difficult stuff like buying a house or having children begins.

[–][deleted] 21 points22 points  (9 children)

I was miserable, trapped, and staying with a mistake for the kids when I found TRP.

Im still married but things are very fucking different. I now choose to stay as I like living in my house and with my kids. but I dont need it and can burn it down and be just fine

That attitude has her clinging like a barnacle and things are fine.

I dont recommend marriage but its not inevitable that if you already sat in the game and drew these shitty cards that you will lose.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (7 children)

but I dont need it and can burn it down and be just fine

Completely agree. It's a long trip to get to that point. Took me 3 years to get there. Just my curiosity, how long for you?

[–]Endorsed ContributorAuvergnat 5 points6 points  (3 children)

Not married here, but interestingly, it also took me 3 years post-unplugging to finally get to the point where I felt like I don't need LTR/marriage at all. Wonder if that would be a typical time to remove a deeply-ingrained belief.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Seems that 3 years is common.

[–]Persaeus 5 points6 points  (1 child)

will concur, 3 years for that plug to be nowhere near the receptacle

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

for that plug to be nowhere near the receptacle

You're a true wordsmith!

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (2 children)

From unplugging to true indifference about the same. 3 years or so. I remember calmly suggesting a separation and it wasn't during an argument nor waw I looking to gain an upperhanf with any ultimatums, I just wasnt pleased with the effort I saw in her looking to be an agreeable partner. She must have all along sensed I wasnt fully at peace with being away from kids and on own. It wasnt a dread of other women, it was a dread of being abandoned. Really primal fear I saw in her eyes and she became stepford wife

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Similar here. In the course of a conversation, she said (and I think she meant to threaten) why don't we just divorce. I calmly and thoughtfully said, maybe you are right. The difference was I not only meant it, I was at peace with it. Over the next few days after that, there was a complete internal release, a strange joy, as I had let go of my attachment to the marriage. The anger and rage emotions that had been so much a part of my life, drifted away. Once I let go, she latched on. Like you said, it isn't dread, it's not wanting to be left behind. She now says things like, "whatever you want, I'm here to make you happy, etc..", and she means it.

Maybe dread got me there. But like you said, it was not dread.

[–]B_ILL 107 points108 points  (23 children)

If a girl doesn't stay with you because you wont marry her she didn't really like you IMHO.

[–]Endorsed ContributorAuvergnat 166 points167 points  (16 children)

This is a typical bluepill comment, ala "just be confident".

Let's try it redpill-style:

Girls have an innate anxiety about long-term providing given that their SMV is going down rapidly past their 20s. Even if they don't believe this because they bought into the "sexy-at-all-age" blue-pill lie, they still have this evolution-built little voice in the back of their mind that say, louder and louder with age, "Lock in the commitment of the highest SMV man you can, ASAP!". This is inherent to their sexual strategy. If you're in a relationship with her, this little nagging voice means that she will feel the need to ensure your long-term commitment, aka to get you to marry her.

Now we know that girls will categorize you either as an alpha lover or a beta provider. If you're a beta to her, your resources and attention are your entire value. If you make it clear you prefer to reserve the right to take those resources away from her (aka not marry), then she will swing branch as fast as possible to a more cooperative branch. If you're an alpha to her, she will insist even more to ensure your commitment. She will be extremely frustrated if you refuse to marry, but she will stay because you're the best she has... and keep hoping she can eventually convince you... until the day she hits the wall and she will leave you in hurry to marry a dependable beta provider (and still fuck you on the side).

In any case, it's not about whether she "likes" you or not, it's whether or not she wants to get married to secure a male's providing for after she's lost her SMV. Some don't want it or need it. But if this is what she wants, there's about nothing you can do to prevent her from leaving you eventually. Now if you want to stay with the same girl forever without marrying her, here's a trick: just find one that is already married to a beta shlub and be her affair partner, or official cuckolder.

[–]SKRedPill 35 points36 points  (0 children)

This is all fine. Only these days there are no consequences for anything women do, so I think it's equal parts hypergamy and equal parts arrogance.

While the evolutionary biology holds good, there's the question of just how spoiled people can get as well.

[–]Ben_Eszes 14 points15 points  (8 children)

Way to go and make things more complicated than they need to be. The point is that the woman doesn't like you -- ever! She likes the way you make her feel, and likes the things you can provide for her. So if she won't stay with you because you won't marry her, then she definitely doesn't really like you.

[–]Endorsed ContributorAuvergnat 43 points44 points  (7 children)

Dumbing down concepts to make them understandable by a wider public is automatically denaturing the concepts. Saying that the original concept is complicated doesn't mean it's unnecessarily complicated. It only means that you are incapable or unwilling to do the intellectual effort to understand something and thus demand something simpler, despite the risks of misconstruing the original concept.

Women's sexual strategy as defined in TRP as "hypergamy" and explained as the dual "Alpha fucks, Beta bucks" might sound too complicated for you but it is the best model out there to explain women's behavior. For any behavior by women in your life, your first line of understanding should be "does she see me as alpha or beta?". Or in other words "Is she sexually attracted to me, or am I just a tool to provide her with something?". If it's too complicated for you and you prefer to use the "she likes me / she doesn't like me" model, then by all means go for it. But don't be surprised when the day comes that she leaves you even though she "likes" you.

[–]Ben_Eszes 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you have an objection to my claim, then feel free to make one. The fact that you needlessly complicate the theories shows that you haven't understood it at a foundational level. Ever heard of the "if you can't explain it to a 5-year old, you don't understand it" concept?

I summarized your drivel by saying:

She likes the way you make her feel [AKA "alpha fucks"]

She likes the things you can provide for her [AKA "beta bucks"]

So considering that, SHE DOESN'T LIKE YOU. Want to try and turn that into a college thesis? Go ahead. All you're doing is circle-jerking by making readers think they're smart because they understand big words.

[–]beginner_ 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Interesting. When it came up, I told my ltr, I will never marry. She did not bail, yet. Also she isnt nagging me about it. Sooner or later I will see how it plays out.

[–]Endorsed ContributorAuvergnat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How long have you been together? How old is she? How financially independent is she?

[–]greatamericancities 1 point2 points  (0 children)

From my own experience (multiple LTRs that end when she wants marriage) this description makes perfect sense. Started to see a slight variation in this pattern develop with the later and most recent LTRs: Women wanting children even more than provisioning. They are willing to keep working or rely on their parents, which means the man they settle for can give them children without real financial or material support. These women still insist on marriage but that might only be a formality, a social requirement. They want to appear proper to friends and family. Divorce is no problem once the number of children they wanted are born and healthy.

I'm baffled that they're worried what people will think if they have children without a marriage license. Seems like society is okay with this now, but maybe it depends on specific families or social groups. They are not worried about what people will think when their (temporary) husband doesn't provide for them and their children. In this scenario the husband is basically a sperm donor. Once he has done that job he is disposable.

[–]Skinnynomore 4 points5 points  (0 children)

No. There’s an art to being concise, and writing a whole paragraph to exaggerate what is said by his one sentence is nonsense.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You didn't say anything different from what he said. If she doesn't stay with you...she didn't really like you. The only exception is what you said about leaving for a beta but still fucking you, but that's not really leaving is it.

[–]1Ramesses_ 23 points24 points  (3 children)

I get where you're coming from but marriage (lifetime security and commitment) is their end game. They might like you but not as much as they like that and if they have to throw you under the bus to get it they will. Think of commitment for women as like sex to a man. Very important and biologically driven.

[–]Brickles09 16 points17 points  (2 children)

What is ironic when considering that 90% of divorces are asked by women... BTW, all girlfriends I had wanted to end the relationship. I was the one wanting “commitment for life”.

[–]askmrcia 5 points6 points  (1 child)

BTW, all girlfriends I had wanted to end the relationship. I was the one wanting “commitment for life”.

Yup same, or they would do shit like start fights with me for no reason or something which would force me to end the relationship so they would not look like the bad guy that ended the relationship.

[–]ramfex21 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I kinda agree with you.. if she leaves because you won’t marry, that’s a good sign of what her intentions for you actually were. We all know when a woman is really in love she will do almost anything including going along with a man not willing to commit to marriage. If she leaves you, she didn’t really love you that much.

[–]epictetus_irl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Who said they left me? a man can leave a relationship too if he gets tired of listening to hints and pressure for rings and babies

[–]_the_shape_ 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Yep.

Once you get the ultimatum or the "I just feel like I'm wasting my time" or "where is this going?" speech, the relationship enters the life-support stage.

[–]dbnuh 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's what fucks with me. I'm 33 and I sort of want to settle down, but I know it's smarter not to. I know that AWALT which isn't a bad thing, but means that given the moment, they could decide to walk away at any point. So I'm glad I haven't gotten married. I'm actually the only person at my job out of 12 people that isn't married or engaged, and everyone seems to be mostly jealous about the time. They always talk about how I can do anything I want with my time. A couple have mentioned that new pussy would be nice, but most of them are just like "Fuck, the fact that you can go do whatever you want, or nothing at all, on your own time, without having to be responsible for any kids or be intertwined with anyone sounds incredible!"

I have 2 cousins that got married in their 20's. Same age as me. One is divorced and one is separated.

[–]Jabroni421 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can get married by the church, just don’t go to the courthouse.

[–]Science4Lawlz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I couldn't agree more! Affirm yourself and inspire millions after your death. Women are weak creatures who only seek to tear men down.

[–]57yearsoldgrandpa 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is one of the best comments on Reddit

[–]feros321 351 points352 points  (40 children)

Look I’m in my mid forties. Married the perfect woman. Luckiest guy I know. And I still wouldn’t ever get married again. There. From the guy who has a fantastic marriage. It’s just not necessary.

[–]StudntRdyTeachrApear 91 points92 points  (10 children)

As someone who is very interested in the challenge of marriage and building a large family, I would love to hear more of your thoughts on this.

[–]Bisuboy 50 points51 points  (1 child)

Think about whether you actually need to marry her. How does marriage improve your life?

If you definitely want to marry her although the system is heavily flawed against you, make a good prenup. Let her get a lawyer different from yours. Let a lawyer check and accept the prenup again ~2 years after marriage.

Apart from that, find yourself a great woman. If you see serious red flags, move away or at least don't commit any further. There are probably hordes of Eastern European and Asian women that would literally do everything for you in order to be able to raise a family while living a life 99% of their country could only dream of.

[–]theaspiringasshole 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Prenups are no guarantee and are often tossed out in court. One thing that does work and will protect you and your assets is an irrevocable trust. Get one set up well beforehand, and put everything you want to keep in it.

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet 94 points95 points  (0 children)

Lol he just fucking said, don't do it.

If you're gonna shoot your own foot, post it on YouTube so we can laugh.

[–]omg_ppl_are_stupid 11 points12 points  (2 children)

I'm the same as feros321. Happily married, life if actually pretty good. But fuck no if i'm ever going to get married, or even encourage my two sons to get married. Most likely there is zero reason for you to actually marry. I mean zero... want kids? Go adopt, go find a women who also wants kids and is willing to co parent, instead of marry and share living spaces. Otherwise i can't think of a single reason to have a women that close within your life. I bust my ass(so does my wife), and what do we really have to show for it.... no time for each other because we have two kids and no time together. Basically, we're co parenting and co habitating for the last 5 years since having children. This is all based on having children.... if you don't want to have children, WHY WOULD YOU GET MARRIED??? there is literally NO reason, i mean NO logic reason for you to wed. You gain NOTHING by marrying. Absolutely NOTHING! If you have any ideas that you have that you actually gain from marriage i would love to hear them.

My block of text is not cohesive at all.... i know this, and i don't care.

[–]askmrcia 10 points11 points  (1 child)

go find a women who also wants kids and is willing to co parent, instead of marry and share living spaces.

I have to disagree here. I'm not sure if it's cool to have my own kids grow up up with basically two sets of parents. The mom that is co parenting will have other guys in her house who is basically another dad.

The same can be said for you assuming you're going to be banging other women that's not your baby mother.

[–]Endorsed Contributorvandaalen 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Here are mine: http://archive.is/yxzC1

[–][deleted] 43 points44 points  (20 children)

Hey man I’d love to hear how you managed to snag somewhat of a unicorn.

Im in my 20s and for some reason my brain is hardwired to be a family man and have babyfever for a daughter.

Growing up Christian and growing up with stable parents that resolves their occasional quarrels like actual adults made me believe and strive for a similar marriage when I hit 30.

Im curious on how men like you and my father manage to snag loyal ones. Really am.

[–]TRP VanguardHumanSockPuppet 70 points71 points  (15 children)

The times are wrong. You grew up in the wrong era. That's not your fault, but it's still your problem.

That's The Red Pill, right there.

You can't have a family and kids. Accept it and thrive, or delude yourself and suffer. Those are your options.

[–][deleted] 38 points39 points  (12 children)

So true.

I'm a 26 year old, and I can see through bullshit faux confidence in my age mates and tell who is trending upward and trending downward. And I'm also at the age where people I grew up with are starting to get married.

Since I work with mainly men who are 15-20 years my senior on average (engineering), many are married with kids. Out of all of them, I think 2-3 are happily married. The others are pretty sloven alcoholics. ALL obese, or morbidly obese. They hate their job, their wives, and their lives in general. They look for any reprieve they can find from their daily lifecycle. They are truly beasts of burden. They look like hell.

The 26 year olds in marriages, from what I see, experience pretty rapid weight gain. Makes sense, no that they are settled and don't need to keep up appearances for their loved ones. They look, health wise, to be trending downward. I can see the formation of unhappy 40 year olds down the road.

Lol, I can see the posts on dead bedrooms already.

The single dudes in their late 30s have a few screws loose, but they are happy. They definitely see life as still a half full glass and enjoy traveling. Some are in shape, some aren't. Most are slaying. Most have savings. They mention they can be lonely at times. And that's understandable when all your friends or coworkers are busy maintaining those awful marriages their in (in general).

Life is suffering. But you can to decide the suffering.

It's no joke out here. And HSP himself said it best.

[–]mynameisfrankfurter 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Beasts of Burdens- that's all men are to society. That is what the government wants and that is what a women will take- why not when men go out of their way to provide this service.

To the men out there, As Nancy Reagan said, Say No to Marriage!

[–]pmmedenver 8 points9 points  (0 children)

If you're lifting solely for women you're doing it for the wrong reasons. I'm 26 and I see myself still lifting 50 years from now. Its typical that men get into some hobby in order to impress women and then find out the hobby itself is better and more meaningful than any woman. Strive for greatness, not an excuse to give up. Shameless plug for Jordan Peterson's new book, it changed my life.

[–]youngzari 7 points8 points  (1 child)

This post is so relatable as a man who recently hit 30. I can see the signs from my peers who are getting married, gaining weight you can foresee the inevitable effects health-wise and happiness-wise on the decline. It almost feels like they have this need to keep up with the joneses which puts their own needs in the backseat.

Sad!

[–]laylowwww 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is spot on. I've seen great physiques turn to schlub overnight at the hand of marriage.

[–]Ballosaurus 1 points1 points [recovered]

single dudes in their late 30s have a few screws loose

Bummer you're shaming them. Seems to me they've got it figured out.

[–]iknowthewhey 13 points14 points  (1 child)

You can't have a family and kids. Accept it and thrive, or delude yourself and suffer. Those are your options.

What does the community still not get about this? There is no family anymore. We were lied to. Wake up and realize that you don't get to have a family anymore. Go out into the world in live. Do not take all this information and ignore the obvious truth. I don't care if you find your unicorn. It still won't work. You can be the most alpha douchebag in town. Your unicorn will divorce you, and run your life into the ground. How many more field reports do people need to see before they realize there is no marriage and no family anymore. Time to wake up and deal with the cold reality.

[–]StudntRdyTeachrApear 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes yes, wake up and allow foreigners to out-bread you while you sink into biological irrelevance because making families is so much harder now. Defeatist mentality, so attractive. White genocide? White suicide.

[–]Merwebb 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Im in my 20s and for some reason my brain is hardwired to be a family man and have babyfever for a daughter.

.... and growing up with stable parents that resolves their occasional quarrels like actual adults made me believe and strive for a similar marriage when I hit 30.

Shit dude, i also have these things moving around my head.

[–]bdebramo1 -1 points0 points  (1 child)

God (not allah buddah or krishna) but true followers of Jesus are allowed reconciliation and a power higher than themselves to be held accountable to. This mess wouldnt fly. This man wouldnt kill himself because God can clean up the biggest messes know to man spoken from a former selfish POS drug addicted family destroyer.. Think about it Who in the politcal scene are fighting for families, unborn babies, and FAIR taxation (if it can ever be fair) and are the only ones who would dare fight for people like this guy, actively fight against the liberal indoctrination in our colleges and schools men and women, are moving towards homeschooling and the right to do so, and is public enemy #1 by the rest of the world? Christians (real Christians with conviction and a relationship with Jesus) Not to say we dont tragicly fall short but things would be alot different if everyone did think they were God and women didnt try to find themselves in another womans vagina. (Dont know why thats their first move)

My almost 40 year old neighbor divorced her husband to pursue her lesbian lover.. she had children.

But we laugh at the people saying REPENT... its only downhill from here. Hes made Himself known through creation if we would just get out this rat race/pussy chasing/adult pacifying nonsense...

Knock, He will answer, Ask, He will answer. Hes waiting on you, and it all starts with Jesus

[–]feros321 8 points9 points  (0 children)

This answer has nothing to do with the psychology of attraction. Nothing. You are only Christian by virtue of time and location of your birth. 5 thousand years ago you would’ve been worshipping Zeus or some shit. Religions change. Laws of attraction do not.

[–]redd_reality 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Try explaining to the plugged in bp, that there is no upside to marriage. It is his idiotic fantasy you're threatening with your reason and he can't handle that. It's his life line.

[–]Magnum994 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your comment resonates with me much more than anything else I have ever read here about marriage, probably because it’s so short and simple...

[–]Ieatlinner 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Get back to me in your 70s.

Im not saying I'd get married, but its a long game man.

[–]AvengerSentinel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you mind expanding on why you feel marriage is unnecessary?

[–]zevfern 61 points62 points  (6 children)

Modern society in all its facets has ruined the possibility of having a healthy relationship.

Incoming Brave New World, I suppose.

[–]HumpyMagoo 7 points8 points  (1 child)

If you read that book you need to read The Wanting Seed by Anthony Burgess.

[–]p_and_q 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The Forever War is also a good read for this genre

[–]beginner_ 4 points5 points  (2 children)

It's kind of a perverse mixture of BNW and 1984. from 1984 we get the surveillance thing, rewriting of history (to some extent) and the party (eg. feminism).

[–]zevfern 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Wouldn't feminism be the equivalent to that girl group in 1984 as opposed to the Party? The Party in my opinion is political correctness.

[–]beginner_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Fair point. Mostly I meant if you go against the current dialog, you will most likely loose your job, friends and more. You can't really voice you real thoughts and opinions anymore. There is almost always that one white-knight around listening in.

[–]1TheProphetPhysiquiel 93 points94 points  (2 children)

The biggest reason women got married before was for security for herself and her children. Now, they can get the security without having to stick around with their beta husbands. Their lack of foresight coupled with the newfound feminine entitlement leads them to believe they can dick around and someone else is going to reward them with another marriage later on.

[–]TitsAndWhiskey 10 points11 points  (1 child)

Well, I mean they probably CAN find another chump. At least for now. Men are slowly starting to wise up, but bluepill chumps are still the majority.

[–]Banned-in-Boston 1 points1 points [recovered]

I think this is the rubicon, if something like this should wver happen to you:

They set my CS at the highest earnings I've ever made in my life - a single month during my time owning a janitorial business - , pre tax, 40%. 

This is when you tell CS, or the judge, "No. I refuse. I will not do that. I will never agree to that amount. Either set a reasonable amount now, or take me to jail."

Jail is not as bad as poverty in slavery.

[–]Pie_021 120 points121 points  (58 children)

Fuck that. Just leave the country. I mean this dude is contemplating suicide, just fucking peace out. Go to Canada, go to a Europe, go to some country where that shit don't fly.

[–]Banned-in-Boston 1 points1 points [recovered]

Too late for him, unless he already has a passport. He can never get one now.

Pro Life Tip: Always hold a valid passport from age 18 onwards.

[–]no_face 57 points58 points  (0 children)

I hear the tunnels under US/Mexico border are cheaper on the way out.

[–][deleted] 41 points42 points  (2 children)

**ANOTHER PRO LIFE TIP: CHILD SUPPORT WILL TAKE YOUR PASSPORT IF YOU DONT PAY, SKIP THE COUNTRY BEFORE THEY DO

[–]Libertarian-Party 20 points21 points  (1 child)

Wouldn’t the real tip be: pay the child support while you slowly move all your assets to foreign countries then secretly apply for residency/citizenship, and when approved, dip out forever?

That seems like the best option. Pay the CS while you make sure the govt cant get another penny from your assets when you leave.

[–]Fortnite_FaceBlaster 1 points1 points [recovered]

I've had one since I was in my young 20's! I'm in my 40's now.. still valid.. blank as fuck, but valid.

[–]KV-n 16 points17 points  (2 children)

Lol i got one recently at age 25 for "just in case" and hopefully it will be blank in my forties too.

Although as an eastern european the emergency i had in mind had much more to do with russia repeating their soviet era than my personal problems.

[–]Fortnite_FaceBlaster 1 points1 points [recovered]

So basically, if you already have your passport, and if they wouldn't issue you a new one because of something in court, you can still leave... because they don't put you on a "no fly" list?

[–]KV-n 4 points5 points  (0 children)

last time russia invaded us in 1968 there were a couple days when people could still legally leave until shit got fully back to fucked up. There was a big emigration wave.

Idk how it would be again but i guess better be prepared for a chance than to have a chance but miss it coz you aint prepared. Plus sometimes the change is gradual and maybe there will be no new passports issued to people who ...... etc.

[–]Endorsed Contributorvandaalen 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Wat? He is paying his CS regularly. Why wouldn't he get a passport? Horseshit.

[–]9h3fr39fh84 1 points1 points [recovered]

unfortunately this will not really work foolproof as the U.S. has considerable influence. though it may not be likely, I believe it is within the realm of legal possibility to have you seized in another country even China, Russia, Viet Nam, etc, depeending on the severity of what is going on with you in the U.S.

[–]Flawless44 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Only for criminal stuff. CS is a grey area.

[–]Chaddeus_Rex 25 points26 points  (6 children)

Canada and Western Europe will extradite you back to the US. Go to Eastern Europe like Ukraine or Russia (easier to blend in). Or go to Thailand.

[–]chrisname 12 points13 points  (3 children)

All of those countries would also probably extradite a foreign fugitive of no political importance.

[–]Voctr 10 points11 points  (1 child)

I wonder if they would put in that much effort for some child support.

[–]chrisname 5 points6 points  (0 children)

If it got into the media, then yes, because otherwise the "long arm of the law" looks a lot shorter. Otherwise, yeah, they might not bother.

[–]Chaddeus_Rex 0 points1 point  (0 children)

At this time, Russia wouldn't extradite out of spite to the US/UK...they expelled most of the Russian diplomats and Russia is pissed so even a minor issue willl be made big by the Russians.

[–]afkb39sdfb 1 point2 points  (1 child)

[–]Chaddeus_Rex 3 points4 points  (0 children)

So i wasnt mistaken about Russia Good to know.

[–][deleted] 30 points31 points  (25 children)

Europe

It’s worse there... did you see the post about Sweden’s sex laws the other day?

[–]DeusVultRightNow 1 points1 points [recovered]

Thankfully Sweden is not representative for all of Europe

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yeah I was just using it as an example because I saw it in a post the other day.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (21 children)

Did you see the one where convicted murderers in Norway serve their sentence on a vacation style ranches and live out nicer lifestyles with more amenities than earned by most Americans?

American's really do go overboard with the self-praise and American-exceptionalism of capitalism. You work yourself to death and get pennies thrown at you while men walk among you with trillions of dollars. And when asked of the reason for the gradient all you can do is shout its praises. Europe just has a more socialistic view where just a couple of the trillions of dollars from the rich get re-invested back into you dirt-poor people living on pennies per day.

How would you like to be immediately upgraded financially to have enough money to buy 15 houses with a governmental stroke of the pen? This is possible! Poor people defending capitalism is almost embarrassing, it's like a starving person in a banquet of food who loudly defends the gluttons who gorge around them.

In Europe you don't pay for healthcare, you don't pay for college, you get out of college and you start earning money. It's like Americans think America is the only place in the world where these things happen. It's why they say you should travel the world sometimes. Europe, Japan, Russia, China. You'll be surprised to come home and feel bad that you have to live in squalor while the people you visited enjoy a much wealthier lifestyle while doing much less work.

It's stockholm syndrome. You've come to love your owner so much, you'll bite the hand of people trying to expose you to life outside your cage. https://www.theguardian.com/society/2013/feb/25/norwegian-prison-inmates-treated-like-people NO! I refuse to acknowledge that I live like a small caged animal in the wealthiest nation in the world! I like it here! I deserve this!

[–]0newinged 1 points1 points [recovered]

As a europian, this is just plain bullshit. No healthcare? We do, just less. Same for college. And getting money with the stroke of a pen? Yea we do, but only enough to barely pay the bills.

To pay for this shit, our tez rate starts at 32% and ends it 51%. More then half your fucking paycheck, but that's not enough. We have to pay money for having shit. Got 20k or more? Pay for it. Bought your own house? Pay for it.

Our socialistic ways never give room for 15 house. It's created to keep us peasants poor. Just rich enough to own a tv and computer to keep us content, but not much more.

Socialism doesn't ever work. The bills keep getting higher, while paychecks are left in the dust. Not working grants you a 1000 euro income and working most jobs gives you 200-300 euro more for 160 hours a week. It punishes you for working, and thus unemployment raises.

Europe will fall through it's socialistic ways.

[–]serviceenginesoon 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Know a pathetic 8 story complex in Berlin, where virtually all of the people living there dont work, dont pay taxes, get money from the government, run buisness with out paying tax, drugs, many there illegal. Its not a slum, its just pathetic and people get taking advantage in every way every day. Not knocking Berlin, Germany or Europe. Amazing Places and People, the ones that dont take advantage

[–]Arnoux 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not working grants you a 1000 euro income and working most jobs gives you 200-300 euro more for 160 hours a month.

Certainly not in my country. Not working barely grants you any money here. You are european and you probably know how vastly different the countries are here, yet you talk about europe like it is one single entity.

[–]LuvBeer 13 points14 points  (0 children)

In Europe you don't pay for healthcare, you don't pay for college

No, you pay for someone else's healthcare and college. The welfare state has created a permanent underclass who live free of charge largely courtesy of a certain demographic, which the media simultaneously portrays as the worst ever to exist.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (8 children)

Have fun paying more taxes and having the government give you everything.

[–]reddishworm 4 points5 points  (3 children)

To supplement /u/0newinged:

In Germany a deadend job will pay 1800€ before taxes. You pay roughly 200€ in actual tax, which admittedly is not much, but you'll pay around 400€ in social security contributions.

That will leave you with 1200€.

Rent, Electricity, Internet, Insurance, Phone? Left with 600€.

Food? Chicken is 6€/kg. 400€ Left.

Save some money incase your washer dies? 200€ left.

Have fun going to bars where a longdrink costs 8-10€.

[–]Endorsed Contributorvandaalen 11 points12 points  (2 children)

Let's do this again.

In Germany a deadend job will pay 1800€ before taxes.

1800€ is an hourly of 10€. That is really fucking low. Even waiting tables will bring you more than than. But OK.

You pay roughly 200€ in actual tax, which admittedly is not much, but you'll pay around 400€ in social security contributions.

If you are Steuerklasse I, you'll be left with ~520€ of tax, social security & health care. So that is 1280,-€

Rent

I live in the city centre of Cologne, one of the most expensive places to live here in Germany and I still managed to find an - admittedly very small - appartment for 325,-€ altogether. For the sake of the argument lets assume you pay 400,-€. That's 880,-€ then

Electricity

I pay ~40€. That's 840€.

Internet

25mbit at NetCologne cost 29,90€. That's 810€

Insurance

What insurance? Haftpflichtversicherung? I don't bet against me & I also never needed one on my 41 years of living. What for even? If you absolutely have to get one, it's about 40€ per year. I think we can leave that out, no?

Phone

I only use pre-paid. Everything else is essentially a credit you are taking from the phone company. I pay 14,99€ per month for Internet Flat and maybe phone for another 5,-€, probably less. That's 770,-€ then.

Food? Chicken is 6€/kg. 400€ Left.

No. Chicken is more like 4€. 200,-€ ist pretty realistic though, if you don#t plan on feeding of thrash. So 570,-€

Save some money incase your washer dies? 200€ left.

Nah. Fuck the washer. You won't have place for that in your small appartment anyways. Go to a laundromat. We'll deduct 30,-€/month for that. That is 540,-€ then.

For ~45€/month you can register at a university here in Cologne, which will give you the Semesterticket. This means free use of public transit in all of Northrhine-Westfalia which is pretty well developed over here. I'll deduct this as well. That is 395,-€ then.

Gym is about 20€. That's 375,-€ then.

So you are left with 375,-€ for your amusement or for saving or whatever. That's not too bad in my opinion.

As a sidenote, going out is retarded on its own, but going out and paying 10€ for somebody to pour together some hipster gin and tonic, is missing chromosome level retarded.

[–]reddishworm 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Thanks for the precise numbers. However, 1800€/160hrs is an hourly rate of 11.25, not 10. It appears you must have a high income if you can neglect a miniscule difference of 200€, which makes me a bit jealous to be honest.

But on the contrary this makes me wonder why you'd choose a laundromat over a washer. Same way I wouldn't wanna ride the town bicycle. Never would I sign a lease for an appartment that has no room for a washer, a separate kitchen, a separate bedroom and sufficient sunlight.

Considering what you said I could probably step down on internet bandwidth and the mobile phone contract. I pay 20€/mo insurance, helps me sleep better. I live in Bavaria and as you already know, things are a little different down here. The university offers no Semesterticket. I pay ~66€/mo for public transportation.

Yea going out is stupid per se, but I have not yet had a girl come over to my apartment without le date. Probably my looks/game...

[–]Endorsed Contributorvandaalen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yea going out is stupid per se, but I have not yet had a girl come over to my apartment without le date.

A coffee is 2,50€ and a walk in the park is for free.

[–]beginner_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Agree. America is pretty unique in their thinking and implementation of capitalism. The job market and jobs mostly are brutal, few holidays, many hours barley raises. Well raises here are also an issue but at least you get do slack-off, work your 40 hrs/week and not a minute more and as soon as I leave my office, good look reaching me and trying to bother me. And the 5+ weeks of holidays which you actually must take and not get fired for taking them.

[–]havelbrandybuck 10 points11 points  (1 child)

When you're at the point where a woman has just taken your entire life from you, I wouldn't be surprised if many men resort to paying their ex a visit before knocking themselves off.

[–]Rich77u 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You don't think Europe or Canada does the same thing?

[–]lorum_ipsum_dolor 16 points17 points  (2 children)

This would take the kind of guts few men could muster but as a negotiating strategy it has its upsides.

  1. The court's primary focus is to get the case off its docket under the best terms it can. Voluntary jail short circuits this goal.

  2. The wife's attorney (and the wife) will be horrified at the prospect of not getting any CS and will quickly agree to getting something over nothing.

The downside is that Family Court Judges can be capricious and unpredictable. There are no doubt some that would say, "Fine. Have fun in jail".

[–]zestytacoz 8 points9 points  (0 children)

It's hard to negotiate with a man with nothing to lose. And a man whose income will be almost entirely taken away will have nothing to lose

[–]TitsAndWhiskey 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Agreed. There are at least three options I would consider before suicide in this scenario. This is one of them.

[–]rman1001 4 points5 points  (1 child)

In my experience, the judge does not really give you the opportunity to speak. I was allowed to speak one sentence of 8 words before the verdict was rendered and the gavel dropped. For those going into family court, you might only get one chance to speak. Make it count.

[–]Senior Endorsed Contributormax_peenor 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When you really look at it, the modern marriage contract is an agreement to accept small morsels of freedom in exchange for performance. This contract extends into divorce.

[–]RedPillRobin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can legally dodge child support but it takes balls. The key to it is your never actually locked up for failure to pay because that would be debtors prison. Your locked up for contempt of court however you have to actually go in front of a court. Never get served papers and never go in front of a judge then all they can do is garnishment of your check. Get a 1099 sub contractor job or own your own business and now your set.

[–]Rian_Stone 121 points122 points  (9 children)

And before any girl who hears this brings up upper class women, and give a sophisticated "don't be poor" argument...

Exactly what annual income makes a woman act right? Wait for the answer.

[–]RedPillCoach 89 points90 points  (1 child)

Brad Pitt made plenty of money and he got the you are an abuser routine because he dared to raise his voice with the kids.

[–]Rian_Stone 50 points51 points  (0 children)

Celebs are professional sociopaths, they never count

[–]mishasam89 59 points60 points  (0 children)

Exactly what annual income makes a woman act right?

lol

these-days, even the princes of Dubai couldn't keep a chick in check

[–]Rollo_Mayhem3 23 points24 points  (1 child)

SIX of my friends are married and still married. Actually there have been no divorces after 10 to 15 years...I actually don't know anyone from my group of friends that got married within 3 years out of college that got a divorce. For all intents, they were equal to higher value than the girl... maybe that explains it.

[–]Hoodwink 5 points6 points  (2 children)

When she makes more than you and isn't willing to give up her career?

Because then she is paying child support?

[–]BirdManBrrrr 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Depends who has custody, if she has custody she's likely still going to get child support regardless.

[–]Hussy68 67 points68 points  (5 children)

Honestly he should just jump the border and get the fuck out

[–]Senior Endorsed Contributormax_peenor 70 points71 points  (4 children)

What border? We've been super busy getting rid of those things. Good luck escaping governments that want to keep their milk cows paying. It's going to get to the point that you'll have to go to some of the most lawless corners of the planet to avoid crushing court orders.

[–]mishasam89 40 points41 points  (0 children)

and people are surprised why i voted for Trump; lol.

which candidate was shilling for the "no borders" again?

[–]uebermacht 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Useful link as the majority of TRP readers are from USA.
However, Russia is not listed so feel free to rawdogg some sluts in your vacation in Florida.
Some cuck will pay for a single mum for sure.

[–]BurningOrangeHeaven 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Wow thats crazy but good to know i can still escape to Asia like i planned hahaha

[–]Chaddeus_Rex 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If you want to run to another country from child support payments, run to a country the US does not have a good relationship with as they will not have an extradition treaty. This includes countries in the Middle East and Russia. Frankly, Russia is very similar to America and you can have a nice life in Moscow as it is essentially a standard metropolitan megapolis similar to LA or NY.

[–][deleted] 66 points67 points  (8 children)

Even after watching my situation unfold (which is very tame compared to that guy, but still) my three closest friends proceeded to get engaged and marry over the course of the past couple of years. It couldn't have happened at a better time for them to see what can (and will likely) happen but they went ahead with it anyway.

Unfortunately it's like touching a hot stove burner. You have to do it once to know what it's like, but this pain lasts a lifetime. Those guys that get married three or four times, though, I really can't explain that one.

[–]BirdManBrrrr 10 points11 points  (2 children)

Everyone who spectates a horror show of a divorce from someone they know and still gets married likely says "oh we're different...she's not like that...we're gonna do it right".

I did. Married and divorced within two years. Guys don't understand how quickly women change their mind; the ring is meaningless.

[–]beginner_ 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Guys don't understand how quickly women change their mind; the ring is meaningless.

It actually has a ton of meaning in that you are a beta pushover. No man really thinks it's a good idea to waste thousands of $ on a ring.

[–]BirdManBrrrr 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Meaningless to a woman's sense of commitment.

No man really thinks it's a good idea to waste thousands of $ on a ring.

Live under a rock lately?

[–]diagnosedADHD 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Does it bother you that your friends found people that they trust enough to marry? I am really sorry that you went through a divorce, I am sure that was extremely difficult for you. However, just because you had a lackluster marriage does not automatically apply to all others.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did I say it bothered me? My point was that reading a statistic like, "70% of women initiate divorce" along with the fallout being burdened by the male doesn't feel as real as watching my experience first hand. I thought they may reconsider or at least seek my advice. They didn't, and that's fine.

[–]Redasshole 105 points106 points  (16 children)

Told my brother some facts about marriage, you know, the usual numbers. % of divorces. % of divorces initiated by women.

Then told he would lose half his shit, wouldn't be able to see his children anymore and would give half his salary to his ex wife until the children are of legal age.

His answer :

that's not that bad

I kid you not.

That's when I stopped trying to help BP guys.

[–]1empatheticapathetic 24 points25 points  (2 children)

Same story. I realised literally today that he is a white knight type, despite having had all the bullshit happen to him.

[–]Redasshole 34 points35 points  (1 child)

They are happy being fucked over.

Take my father. He is abused by my feminist mother constantly.

Whenever I would step up to defend him he would end up attacking me.

Whenever I would side with my mother and injustly attack him, criticize him...he would be happy and tell me I'm right and he would appreciate me more.

I mean I'm all for treating you right but if you punish me for treating you right and reward me for treating you like a piece of shit....

Those people live in a different world than us and none of us can't understand them anymore and vice versa.

[–]1empatheticapathetic 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I can understand it to a degree; from my viewpoint it's a case of low self esteem and lack of understanding of gender dynamics. It can easily be cured (in the case of my brother) but they are weak, lazy and afraid to take a risk and 'lose'. Especially if time is not on their side any more.

[–]havelbrandybuck 23 points24 points  (9 children)

What's the alternative? You don't get married, spend the rest of your life fucking random women and die without a family and kids, or you date a woman who doesn't want children? Marriage is the biggest life risk for men but it's the only way they'll have a strong family foundation.

[–]SKRedPill 27 points28 points  (2 children)

To really understand what true abundance feels like, one needs to think about how you're gonna dealing with old age, disease, loss of work, money, your home, degeneration, dependence, isolation and death. And let me get the bad news out of the way first -- these things are the curse of the earth and they WILL come to you, sooner or later, if you're not ready.

What I see is that when a lot of men cross 50-60 and their testosterone declines, they start getting these fears. Most younger people marry and start families from this needy point of origin -- only to see that their fears attracted the very thing they fear. As men, we need to figure out how we're going to face these, it's not if, but when.

These fears when not addressed, keeps a man trapped and bound, hurts his confidence and abundance mentality, and it'll force you to build your life around a needy paradigm. The thought at the very bottom of your mind, is the one that'll come true.

Now how's that relevant to TRP? This. You cannot fully discover the things that make you a high value attractive man -- fearlessness, power, confidence and abundance without a healthy frame and a way of living that addresses these.

Paternal love is real. Men aren't drone bees. They love children, they have a drive to pass on their genes and the lessons they learned to another generation. Children love and need parents and a strong family foundation. Trust and the needs of many is what built all aspects of civilization. But it's not possible the way people and the government are today. Men must take back their power to commit, but there'll be plenty of fools willing to get fucked over who won't get it until it hits.

If that's the only way how men need to awaken to the truth, so be it. If you still want to take the risk, go ahead, but be prepared. It's only a matter of when, and how ugly.

[–]havelbrandybuck -1 points0 points  (1 child)

If that's the only how men need to awaken to the truth, so be it. If you still want to take the risk, go ahead, but be prepared. It's only a matter of when, and how ugly.

There's nothing wrong with going into a relationship or marriage with knowing that statistically it won't work out - that's the mindset from the reality of the world we live in - however likewise all the doubt and caution you have with commitment links back to the fear and insecurities of your post and can be self-jeapordising to your family, legacy and relationship.

At the end of the day, all men can do is make their best judgement and choose a woman and hope she has similar basic moral values to not deprive her children of a father figure. Women simply cannot raise a child to a satisfactory standard on her own. Children are not stupid and over time, especially after development through their teens will see both parents for who they are, despite the warped view one parent tries to spin.

[–]SKRedPill 7 points8 points  (0 children)

It's not a question of right or wrong. Thing is, your life will have to go on after the breakup. The question is - do you know what that involves? The consequences of a marriage and family breakup are on a whole other level to breaking up with your first crush.

For all the talk, no one really knows what it's like to get hit by a train till they do. Yeah, people do get up from that and move on and even thrive again - but you've got to be in a position to do that if and when such a time comes. There was one guy here who wrote about how he had to go homeless on the streets for a while. And then there's the emotional impact to deal with. Practically everyone here woke up only after being hit by that bolt of lightning.

And it will wreck your kids up. They better be ready for it too. If you're that bulletproof and abundant, only then it makes sense.

[–]Redasshole 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Wrong..........

You can still have a family and not get married.

[–]thedaynos 2 points3 points  (0 children)

isn't the alternative to get a solid prenup?

i realize with a prenup she can still fuck you over with custody but you minimize the risk of her leaving when she realizes she won't get anything aside from child support.

[–]comcain 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Women who don't want children are usually broken in some way. Or they change their mind suddenly at 40. The "biological clock" is no joke. Beware.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (1 child)

that’s not that bad

Send him this story and maybe his response will change...

[–]Redasshole 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I don't bother anymore.

I mean if I sent him this story he would call me a misogynist and attack me.

Try to help and you get attacked. So why try to help anymore?

[–]ramfex21 50 points51 points  (20 children)

My LTR of 4 years is starting to nag about marriage and complaining that I don’t want to get married. I’m not going to cave. I know too much now to even consider marriage

[–]Pastelitomaracucho 17 points18 points  (1 child)

I caved. But reacted and got out shortly after and without any financial damage.

My advice: walk.

[–]4scoopscomeon 15 points16 points  (1 child)

Next time she brings it up, you should ask her why exactly she wants to get married. Unless you already have?

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (1 child)

I'm in the same boat man .. I've been with my girl a little over 2 years and she definitely keeps mentioning marriage, hinting at engagement, moving in, kids, etc.

Frankly, it's a shit situation because she really is a sincere, decent person. I just feel like I know too much now. The Easter bunny isn't real, so to speak...

[–]ramfex21 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’d feel an immense restriction if I got married. Like I see guys who are married, following around their wives like little puppies pretending to be happy with their circumstances. We all know that they aren’t happy, they literally have no mobility or freedom. Women love control. And they way they do it is with marriage and children. And if they can’t get a man to commit they literally begin to lose their shit.

[–]cloudspike 4 points5 points  (0 children)

lead her on. Tell her you need X amount saves up first. That should take a year and a half. Then propose, plan the marriage, and then dump her. You get good engagement sex.

[–]VikingOverlorde 7 points8 points  (2 children)

You should probably sack up and break up with her at this point. Sounds like a big disagreement.

[–]ramfex21 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yea that’s the most probable outcome

[–]beginner_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can't just always break-up instantly. First tell her clearly that you will never marry. Then if she keeps to nag and does not enter your frame, then dump her.

[–]1OneRedSock 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Not sure what these other fools are talking about "have you asked her..." or "have you talked about why...".

Fucking hard next, immediately. When the marriage talks begin, it's time to end. Once they got marriage on the brain, all they see is signs of marriage and commitment. She'll zero in on all social media about friends getting married, then bitch. Or she'll talk to a friend who's brother's cousin's sister is getting married, then bitch. It's just death by a thousand nags.

Been there, fuck that.

[–]ramfex21 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the advice! I’m working on getting out ASAP . Now she’s talking about buying property together. Apparently she has decided where as well lol. I can’t wait to be a free man.

[–]askmrcia 0 points1 point  (2 children)

I curious, did you explain to her that you don't need to sign a paper to show that you love her? Just wondering how she would reply

[–]ramfex21 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Yes I’ve explained that I don’t need to sign a legal document to prove my commitment or love but she just brings up all this bullshit like ‘it’s the ultimate gesture of commitment carried out in front of friends and family’ . IMO she is anxious that she can’t get me to commit to marriage. I think it is a control thing for her that she needs to know I’m her bitch by agreeing to marriage. She says without me agreeing to marry her in the future she doesn’t know where we stand in this relationship. It’s all a load of BS lol. We’ve had big arguments about this, almost to the point of breaking up. Plus it doesn’t help when her friends are getting engaged and she’s like ‘why don’t you love me that much’. ‘Am I not good enough for you’.

We all know feminism is rampant and women think they are entitled to anything they want... she literally said to me ‘are you telling me I can’t have something that I want’.. I was like ‘with me, yes’.

I’m kinda expecting her to break up with me. I’m not going to be naive

[–]askmrcia 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ahhhh ok, I figured as much. Just was curious how she would frame it if you didn't want to commit with marriage.

My brother gave in. He didn't want to marry, but his wife pressured him to death. His wife's sister got married and her friends got married so the pressure increased tend fold.

He's not the happiest but he understands that it's his fault. The Good news is I can't see her killing him in the divorce procedure because she makes Good money herself.

Point is, hang in there.

[–]ricksprison 0 points1 point  (1 child)

How do you handle it? I usually give them the “it wouldn’t change the dynamic of our relationship, so what’s the point?”

[–]ramfex21 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And you are right... it would change everything. I’m not going to roll the dice on that shit.

I’ve just told her I’m not interested in marriage and I don’t see the point in it. Like why do I need to sign a legal document to show my love? She wants me to list reasons to her. Then I give her some stats or something about shitty marriage and divorce rape and she says can you give anecdotal examples of this.

[–]SigmaBusiness 1 points1 points [recovered]

Why are you staying in the LTR? Don't you get tired of hitting that same pussy? Break up. Walk. Go out. Get new chicks.

[–]ramfex21 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m going to.. just sorting out living arrangement etc.

[–]SKRedPill 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Paternal love is real. Men aren't drone bees. They love children, they have a drive to pass on their genes and the lessons they learned to another generation. Children love and need parents and a strong family foundation. Trust and the needs of many is what built all aspects of civilization. But it's not possible the way people and the government are today. Men must take back their power to commit, but there'll be plenty of fools willing to get fucked over who won't get it until it hits.

If that's the only how men need to awaken to the truth, so be it. If you still want to take the risk, go ahead, but be prepared. It's only a matter of when, and how ugly.

[–]eagle_shadow 69 points70 points  (10 children)

I'm sorry, but a good chunk of this is complete bullshit.

Texas does not base CS on one month of pay, but on the last year's earnings prior to divorce.

Restraining orders do not mean a higher rate of achieving custody.

There is free legal help for both men and women in Texas.

95% of all custody cases do not go to women. More and more men are challenging custody, and men who do challenge for custody get custody the vast majority of the time.

How do I know this? Because I got a fucking divorce in Texas and won. I beat everything this man said he faced because I faced it, too. Control your emotions, document your shit, and do what is best for your kids. If she truly is a fuck up, you will win. In short, be a goddamn man and stop whining by blaming the woman.

[–]fokm 36 points37 points  (3 children)

Another user in he original thread went through dudes comment history and yes, this is a troll post it seems.

What really sucks is that it’s completely plausible barring those details.

[–]eagle_shadow 23 points24 points  (2 children)

It's plausible, but only if you literally do nothing. My frustration is that this sub is supposed to be for men to better themselves, but all too often it turns into a woman bashing echo chamber.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

In short, be a goddamn man and stop whining by blaming the woman.

That's not really valid since the entire "family court" (puke) system is rigged against men in favor of women... so even if you do have a "good case", they can still easily win. Sounds like you got lucky.

[–]eagle_shadow 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Yes, it is valid. The op was making excuses that were totally within his realm of control. You can either be pissed and bitch, or do something about it. I didn't get lucky. Stats are showing more men are fighting stereotypical expectations in family court, and they are winning more often than not when they do. And isn't that what this sub is supposed to be about---improving ourselves as men? Or, are we supposed to whine and bitch when the odds are supposedly against us even though we can do something about it?

[–]thedaynos 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i agree much of this HAS to be bullshit as i know a good handful of super damaged women who only get to see their kids like 1 or 2 days a month and under strict supervision. And i'm in one of the worst states for divorce for men.

[–]Hyper_Sonik 39 points40 points  (9 children)

Buddy I went through a very similar situation in the past year and a half. My high school sweetheart was pregnant with my son. I was supportive to the nth degree. She dumped my ass on valentine's day and ignored me the entire pregnancy. Right after the baby was born she starts going out with her ex who had been in jail. They broke up after about a month. We got back together. I knew it wouldn't last but wanted to see my son for the first time and spend as much time as possible. 5 days before Christmas she texts me at work saying it was a big mistake for getting back with me and that she was going to go back with her ex who was in jail. Can't imagine the pain. But it's slowly getting bether. Trust me, the pain numbs. I haven't seen my son in almost 2 months and it's he'll. I made one last Stand with her on the phone and told her she will call me to come to and understanding or I will not call or text. I did that because she was trying to pull a power play on me, demanding I pay her monew, pay for a bunch of shot even though she gets a LOT of money for the baby from the government, and her insistence that her ex is going to have a talk with me. I recognized the cuck frame she was trying to put me in and walked away. Still haven't heard from her. Ran into her parents a couple weeks ago and they were sympathetic. The sad and painfull part is I have to walk away in ghost.mode in the hopes she pulls back into my frame and from there I won't give and inch. Ice been reading TRP for the past year but it's really this situation with her and that I have been able to recognize paralells and RP lessons. I know what NOT to do. Anyways, our story isn't uncommon so don't beat yourself up. Just realize AWALT. And talk to the courts because the will adjust your payment to fit your income.

[–]Denver_Luv3 93 points94 points  (2 children)

I haven't seen my son in almost 2 months and it's he'll.

I don't want to hit you when you're down, but have you gotten a DNA test? If not, that should be your one number priority right now.

[–]yellowboy212 1 points1 points [recovered]

wish you the best. using the kid as a pawn. girls are ruthless which is why i feel nothing when applying trp

[–]JJ3314 13 points14 points  (0 children)

It’s hard to feel empathy for women when you hear stories like this. I agree. Unfortunately this scenario is not at all uncommon, and there are decent numbers of women who would provide emotional support to a friend engaging in this sort of behavior as well. Young men really need to get their wits about them early. This is a war, but it’s largely being fought on psychological grounds, and in the courts, academia, and media.

[–]yoghurtorgan 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Talk to a lawyer to see what your options may be, if the other guy was in prison for violent things it may sway a judge.

[–]norcalguy510 4 points5 points  (0 children)

So have you initiated any motions to get 50% custody? I understand how you feel, but you cannot afford to react, instead plan, and act.

[–]Endorsed Contributorsadomasochrist 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Understand the feelings you have right now are essentially ego. Just give distance and with time a relationship will likely naturally grow, but enforce your boundaries.

But again, understand your desire right now that is overwhelming you likely doesn't accurately reflect how you'd feel if you had time to meet your child and let them into your heart.

Having kids is straight work, and the nurturing is a female duty. You're operating on male duty and honor right now.

I hope in the future I have a way of helping guys like you but I don't think this is any easier than convincing guys about the way it is in the first place. Having kids is its own "unplugging."

[–]blackedoutfast 41 points42 points  (4 children)

play stupid games, win stupid prizes

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

This always gets to me. I don't know how you can walk into the most shadiest casino and not see the red flags. I can actually see a couple and in 15mins of meeting them I already know it will fuck up. People ignore the signs and signals and when shit goes wrong. They forget about that time where she cheated and they forgave her, or the other time where she went to an ex's house, going out late to parties and coming back pissed drunk, drinks, have no hobbies, social media is her only life, daddy's little princess, narcissistic, rude to people lower than her. Like they just block out everything and when all the cards are down and they failed to call her bluff, "But I thought you were different", Nahh son, you wanted her to be different. If someone isn't a good sport. I don't play.

[–]Daspker780 11 points12 points  (2 children)

You sound like my old Drill Sergeant

[–]VikingOverlorde 0 points1 point  (1 child)

He sounds like everyone on the internet

[–]1sezamus 8 points9 points  (0 children)

JUST DON'T DO IT... EVER!

I live in Poland - ultraconservative, catholic country and guess what? Married/engaged girls are the first ones to hit on me. The more they know me, the more they want me. Unexperienced, young girls get shy, but married ones get all touchy, while their beta sits at home or "goes with the guys".

You want to "Let her boyfriend/husband worry" than be the idiot who worries why she is coming home so late.

u/Whisper, if it was not for you, I would not see that shit with my own eyes. I adopted the mentality you suggested, that her social deal is not my responsibilty, so I escalated things and my eyes got opened.

[–]jeromeantoinecarter 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Shit was all his fault too. Had a fucking terrible attorney and I have a feeling he felt bad about something and just agreed to whatever that bitch was asking for. There are no statutes that would take his one month of highest ever earning to calculate his CS off of, that is bullshit. He also said it was determined in arbitration, which means he AGREED TO IT! idiot!.

I am answering, and pissed at this DF because I am divorced to a land whale, pay $3,200/mo for another 10.5 years! Bitch wanted $7k/mo!!! Best bet for this guy or any guy is to go out an improve yourself from the divorce date status (just don't let her know). My income has doubled and I live like a pauper in front of her. Let that cunt believe she is killing me. Will say divorcing her fat ass was the best thing ever in my life. She gained 100 pounds after 2 kids, then wanted to quit her 100k/yr job that allowed her to work from home, and wanted me to give her fat ass more kids! Said Fuck no, she moved out, then when I didn't chase her, tried to beg her way back,,, no fucking way. Now at 47, divorced 6 years, I have enjoyed 20-40 year old women and had 5 girls going at once, and they all knew about each other! Fucking crazy how this RP works, compared to what you are taught growing up.

Also, Having a C-suite job, high 6 figure income, work out with the same strength as when I was in my 20's, TRT, hair replacement. Men remain desirable if they make an effort.

Thanks for the opportunity to vent, rant...

[–]tteabag2591 19 points20 points  (12 children)

People in this sub are so bad about conflating "relationship" with "marriage". You can have a solid relationship without marrying anyone. You can even have children and not marry. The marriage part is you making a foolish bet just to flaunt how awesome you think your relationship is at the moment. Stay humble and just don't marry. You maintain the power of leaving that way. That's your only weapon in a gynocentric society.

[–]tallwheel 3 points4 points  (4 children)

If you have children, you can still end up paying CS whether you're married or not.

[–]THESkipp 6 points7 points  (2 children)

You don’t loose half of everything though.

[–]IClogToilets 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Well, I would not be so sure. Depends upon what assets were collected during the relationship.

[–]Flawless44 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Assets belong to their in individual owners.

[–]tteabag2591 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Doesn't mean you have to make it worse by risking alimony and all your assets. Child support is understandable in principle. If you make a kid you SHOULD be held financially responsible for it. How much the payments are could use some adjustment though.

[–]IClogToilets 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you are going to have kids, you should get married. When you break up, you will still be paying child support, but will have more parental rights if you are married and getting divorced.

[–][deleted] 31 points32 points  (6 children)

Women are cruel and enjoy making men hurt emotionally and financially. It is a sick form of “grrrl power” to them. Something like this happened to me but without the kid. She dyed her hair red and started cheating on me when we were supposed to be getting married. Yes I am happy we never married but shocked at how malicious women can be.

[–]papapinga 22 points23 points  (0 children)

It's because we are physically able to overpower them, whereas they need to resort to psychological means to exert force. Not condoning it just a biological observation

[–]suaressi 11 points12 points  (3 children)

and i bet it happened almost overnight. they can do a complete 180 on you and act as if you were never there to begin with

[–]banjew 14 points15 points  (2 children)

It's called lightswitch effect. Not only they forget you, they forget that they ever loved you to begin with. That's why they say "I never really loved you anyway" they really forget it. It's some kind of evolutionary shit they have programmed in their heads.

[–]GarandTheftAvto 5 points6 points  (1 child)

IIIRC the leading theory (at least in our sub) is that it’s an evolutional adaptation for when a new group comes into the tribe and slaughters everyone, killing offspring and taking wives. It’s interesting as hell, in addition to being very tough to accept.

[–]varlogmessages 1 point2 points  (0 children)

UHVyZ2luZyBteSBjb21tZW50cw==

[–]zyqkvx 14 points15 points  (2 children)

<Hopefully helpful rant>

Edit: I misread, thought troubled guy made original post.

Dealing with tragedy is yet one more RP skill. Whether you have a flu so bad you want to die, suicide seems like a rational choice, you lost your job and have no means to pay rent and / or you got divorced it you will be in a state you believe is how it's always been and will always be. It's not. Use your mind. The amount of time you spend that 'that mental' that you want to die is a tiny sliver of the time you have lived. Understand that. The most fucked situation will pass with no effort and some patience. That's rule #1. It gets better than that because if you can just keep yourself distracted, say watching a movie, then movie hopping to kill 4 hours of this sliver you are ahead. That's rule #2.. you can wait it out in a waiting room fretting over it the whole time and it will pass so distracting yourself for hours is even better. It's much better to go in to self regulation mode, and distract yourself for hours too. That is, make sure you have eaten a few times every day, don't spend time thinking about the problems in a way that drives you crazy. Choose one of your problems and solve it in chunks, then use any downtime to distract yourself with a movie or a podcast. That's rule #3 Merely distracting yourself will get you out of 'wanting death' mode, but if you can put in some work jobs as a form distraction, and solving some of the problems as a form of distraction, you will not only come out of it soon enough, you will be happy you did and ready to move on.

It doesn't matter if you when to a street corner and hung around like a bum for a week. It will pass.

After. you know it will pass. no matter what's a matter of channeling yourself to pass the time.

....

Also. All the 'deadbeat dad' and other shit are just shit women criminally use to distract blame from themselves. You need strategies to deal with that shit as well. It's about learning not to lower your head when one of these verbal abuse lines is bolting towards you. It's about seeing them for what they are AWHILE you are being shanked with this abuse. You should see these actions as petting, malicious and childlike. As a strategy do not every visualize yourself as a deadbeat dad or ever engage in explaining to them why you are not a deadbeat dad. That's just shit stupid stuff men do. If a woman is blatantly using a lie to get somewhere, she will never say 'oh your right' after you explain it to her. Don't allow yourself to be around those 'backing her up' Avoid the ones you must see sometimes, never see yourself as what they are calling you, and never engage or explain. If you have to retreat, retreat to your real friends and / or here.

Eliminate as much (that is all) of the drama and brain damage as possible by keeping busy or distracted (a healthy combo of both is the ticket). Put logistical strategies to deal with this shit in place. Who knows maybe you'll have a flu from hell next year, you can use the same strategies again.

Maybe watch stoism videos on youtube. It's timely information that will put you in the right frame of mind. That is don't shit time trying to control what you can't control, and go full force on what you can control (you can always complete them and feel rewarded), especially times like this. Another one. Remember that all of your problems are stupid trivial in the big scheme of things. If you are acting out drama you chose to. No different then when you see someone else act like a clown when they are getting arrested or after a divorce. What do you think of them? you are thinking them acting out is just retarded. Accept that if you are acting out as a drama clown you it's useless and you are doing it by choice, not because it's a 'normal response'. That's another stoic thing, but I didn't explain that one that well.

Here's a link to youtube videos on stoism. Clicking on any one of them will probably get your head screwed on straight again.

Also read 'Light Switch Effect' in the sidebar.

[–]hammerhearth 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I knew you were a stoic before you said anything about stoicism.

Fellas, this is the right state of mind. No matter how bad things get, nothing can harm the soul but the soul itself.

Do not be fooled by externals. Guard your heart and soul above all.

[–]GarandTheftAvto 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great contribution, I think this could even be a whole post on dealing with tragedy. Have you thought about expanding it?

[–]Endorsed Contributormonsieurhire2 9 points10 points  (2 children)

Well, I guess this is part of the mechanics of how the alphas at the apex of society get their never-ending supply of slave-betas, gammas, and omegas to fit into their pyramid-schemes.

Also, OP is a textbook example of how not to react. He is just taking it. They set his child support on a one-off event and he doesn't appeal that? If Texas really is that unjust, he should fucking flee the state, disappear, and start a new life, not fork over his dwindling savings to that vampire.

[–]WholesomeAwesome 0 points1 point  (1 child)

what are the gammas and omegas for?

[–]Endorsed Contributormonsieurhire2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Slave-labor, cannon-fodder, fuel, prey, etc.

[–]Bear-With-Bit 5 points6 points  (0 children)

When you get over how badly women behave in marriage, you will see how badly men act too -- but not with infidelity, insensitivity, or apathy as this culture will lead you to believe, but how spineless, self-brainwashed and weak husbands and fathers have become.

[–]Pastelitomaracucho 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Was married once. Got out of that relationship as fast as I could once the baby talks started to mix with the proposals to "open the relationship". That shit was ticking bomb. I'm never doing it again.

I have gotten to know about my ex since then: she's still having a hard-working, career-driven life as an independent woman. Good for her, but a massive lesson for me and all of us: once they are bored with life, they just want to attempt to spice things up at OUR expense.

In other news, all my married friends are unhappy, 50% of my close female friends are cheating on their husbands or boyfriends while trying to "reinvent themselves", "find who they really are", "exploring polyamory" (without telling their men) and so on.

I get them, both boys and girls. Married life is boring. Routine is boring. But we men are generally on the pink end of the cock if we enter into a marriage contract and things go south.

[–]SKRedPill 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Two things need to go out the door from American and European countries

1) No fault divorce 2) Contraception

Life will be a bit more boring, but hey, much less abuse of man!

[–]varlogmessages 4 points5 points  (0 children)

UHVyZ2luZyBteSBjb21tZW50cw==

[–]ThatGuyIam123 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I wouldn't be about to kill MYSELF....

[–]DrBrainWillisto 7 points8 points  (4 children)

I think the real takeaway here is don't have a kid.

[–]Millixaw 1 point2 points  (3 children)

Lots of men want to father a son, though.

[–]DrBrainWillisto 0 points1 point  (2 children)

And lots of men have happy marriages without kids.

[–]Black_Mesa_Dagda 0 points1 point  (1 child)

you misspelled "relationships"

[–]DrBrainWillisto 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well I’m married with no kids

[–]Skinnynomore 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Am I the only one that would fake their death and start over if this was them?

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The thing is that American Laws are somewhat super strict on divorce ... almost oppressive to the husband ... in other countries where the laws are more relaxed, you don't get into the quoted situations

But to answer the question, don't get married unless you and your spouse are religious people. Marriage is based off religion, so makes no sense why you'd want to if you aren't?

[–]Bottled_Void 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Actually, in this scenario, I bet it makes very little difference if he's married or not. Bring your own condoms guys.

[–]sunbro29 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Can't a prenup prevent this sort of thing? I would only marry a woman if she was so wrapped around my finger she'd sign a prenup, otherwise, no deal.

[–]askmrcia 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes and no. There has been cases where prenups were thrown out.

Also good luck finding any woman that would agree to one. Asking for a prenup is basically telling your wife that you dont trust her and those vows you guys promised dont mean shit.

I think pre nups work better for more wealthy individuals or people that marry just for status (IE politicians, celebs, ect...).

[–]ep1939 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Could anybody link the original?

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lol if i were this guy i would just go live in the mountains for a while... no social media or anything for a year.. just relax.. lmfao.. police have better things to do than chase some dude who isn't paying child support. And its pretty easy to duck the cops. Just say you lost your mind and you don't remember the last year! LOL! all you know is you just woke up on the other side of the country, or in another country, and you don't remember how you got there! Appear as dumb as possible so they dont suspect youre up to anything. Get a lawyer to find some obscure mental illness that has been observed in people with your genotype and that this illness makes people forget large parts of their lives. Haha. Better to lie than slave away for a bitch.

Its not that hard to live a good life. Just self educate yourself with some self help books and live as a free man. I recommend How to Win Friends and Influence People, the 48 laws of power, and the art of war. and i would never ever ever EVER give a SINGLE penny for child support. NOT. A. PENNY. motherfucker. No bitch is ruining my life. No bitch.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If younger married, marry a girl with similar assets and a high paying job. That's what my dad did and when they got divorced both of them were well off financially.

[–]hodltaco 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Damn that title made me swallow. Old guy here, married twice and all I can say is DO NOT FUCKING GET MARRIED!

[–]Ismoketomuch 7 points8 points  (31 children)

I just dont understand men who marry poor uneducated women. I will get married to my LTR but not until she gets her PHD. She will make more money then I do and then if shit foes sideways she will be the bread winner in court. Might get myself some CS if it really gets twisted.

[–]netgrey 1 points1 points [recovered]

You’re delusional. How many PHDs make money? How much loans do they have? How much respect is they have for their man who has less of an education then they do?

Have fun with that. Tip me in 5 years when you’re divorced raped.

[–]Timthetiny 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My coworker PhDs make 300-500k per year.

[–]Ismoketomuch 6 points7 points  (16 children)

Every medical doctor I know makes money and lots of it. School loans come with the education and she already pays her own first school loan that got her a BA.

She treats me like a king now and she has a Bachelors in Bio Engineering and I Don’t even have a degree. Our money is separate, she pays for most stuff but we don’t combine our income.

Though I am about to go into a Nursing program and I may do a PA degree afterward.

We already been together 6 years and living together 5.

She isnt like other woman but she still is one. So I treat her as such. But anyway in California, the person who makes the most money get divorce raped, not just men. Its just rare that women are the bread winners.

Im full Red Pilled and apply its theories but still, why do men marry poor uneducated women. If a poor girl asked me, when I was gonna propose, I would ask when you getting a degree? I don’t marry whores, I marry a woman who was brought up to take of herself, educated, and driven. Thats the only type of women I would ever consider to take as a wife. Hence why I am still not married, but I could be close... 8 years to go. Ill be 40 by then and she will be 37.

[–]TheRojoPill 15 points16 points  (5 children)

“She isn’t like other women”....oh boy here we go again! I’ll wait eagerly for your post in a few months on how things fell to shit, how we were right all along and how you now believe in the old adage which we’ll say together in harmonious unison ...All Women Are Like That”

[–]netgrey 1 points1 points [recovered]

Lol medical doctors are even worse, they are all fucking each other all the time. Have fun getting cucked

[–]EscapeTheGoat 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Hey guys I mean let's be fair to the man. We don't know what he looks like or what the girl looks like. I've seen plenty of nerdy AF women who aren't really about to cheat on their boyfriends or divorce them, but they are often pretty darn sexually repressed and frankly not anything I'd want to sleep with. I respect them in professional settings, but their SMV is frankly too low for them to be a problem for you anyway. That being said, this relationship situation sounds a bit dicey TBH. If she's better than you professionally, which let's be honest she sounds like it, you'll never really be the man in that relationship.

[–]BirdManBrrrr 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Low SMV, nerdy girls fuck too. Just because you don't touch them doesn't mean they won't have legions of thirsty, equally nerdy guys orbiting.

[–]meermaalsgeprobeerd 2 points3 points  (6 children)

I like smart women too, they're better at lying and keep the illusion alive longer. The more they make me feel like I'm worth something, the more suspicious I get... Or at least, nowadays I do, those were some hard lessons, good luck with that. Or maybe you're one really is diffirent, I hope so for your sake.

[–]BirdManBrrrr 1 point2 points  (5 children)

We can make bets on how long it will take this broad's friends to start the "Oh you can do soooo much better than him...", assuming it hasn't already. We can follow that with how quickly she starts to believe it.

[–]meermaalsgeprobeerd 0 points1 point  (4 children)

Maybe, but in that case the 'friends' are just jealous, he could just fuck her friends and be done with it. Let's just hope his GF hasn't found out that having a BF makes her attractive to guys looking to boast their ego's. She might just be stringing him along so that it's more exciting to duck other guys. However, I genuinely hope he has found something special, even though I doubt it.

[–]BirdManBrrrr 1 point2 points  (3 children)

Jealous? Of what? She will have her PhD (and inferred MD) and he'll maybe be a nurse, or PA at best after a few years? She'll outearn him by multiples. Unless he's got some extreme good looks, expert level game, and awesome sex skills the deck is stacked against him from the beginning. This is a huge mismatch, even if his SMV is 2-3 points higher than hers to begin with.

If that isn't already fodder for the hens to cluck it will be. The minute he slips and she's not haaapy all of this will be right in her face with her grrrlfrands right alongside. Maybe he'll make out in the divorce but if they has kids he'll def be paying child support.

Or, she's the 0.01% of NAWALT who loves unconditionally and won't emasculate her man for not being better than her.

[–]meermaalsgeprobeerd 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Jealous of her because she has someone that thinks she's worth the commitment. Maybe the deck is stacked against him. But thinking like that is going to make it a self-fulfilling prophecy. I believe in TRP, but I'm also a romantic. Nothing lasts forever but maybe he could get a couple of good months out of it. In the end he will get hurt but then again, every good party is going to leave a bitch of a hang over. That's not going to stop me from partying, and it shouldn't stop this guy. Let's just hope he has the balls to call it quits when the tide turns.

[–]BirdManBrrrr 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Men are romantic, indeed.

Women now have the option of shedding their traditional gender roles while holding men to the theirs; as a rule women date up or date parallel at best, rarely down. Perhaps this guy's women is actually different, but I won't put my money on it.

Nothing lasts forever but maybe he could get a couple of good months out of it.

"She's not yours, its just your turn."

He intends to marry her...mind you. Add kids (potentially) and he's still liable in the eyes of the courts.

I'm not saying it can't work, I'm saying he has a hell of an uphill climb.

[–]meermaalsgeprobeerd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

True true, but that shouldn't be a reason to not go after what you want. These are theories to help you get what you want.

I've been taking the redpill since before I knew it was called the red pill. So I got some different quotes, got my first rule from Iceberg Slim, in his book: my life as a pimp.

He says: 'pimping is to reverse the game on a hoe'

So if this guy wants to land a girl making money for him so he can chill out the rest of his days he should go for it. He should know how to do it, women have been doing it for centuries. He might have to manipulate the shot out of that girl and be OK with here cheating and such. I mean, not my cup o' tea, but if he wants to reverse those gender roles, all the more power him.

We can make the reversed gender roles work in our advantage, we're just too proud.

[–]SonOfSparda304 16 points17 points  (7 children)

I've never met a PhD with a stable mind. Don't do it.

[–]banjew 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I've never met a PhD with a stable mind. Don't do it.

Have PhD. LTR also has a PhD. Can confirm.

[–]coin_pwr 3 points4 points  (3 children)

Would like to know more about this.

[–]SonOfSparda304 0 points1 point  (2 children)

What's there to explain? Grad students are batshit.

[–]banjew 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Grad school is like Seal Team school for the mind. It breaks you mind and will to make it stronger. Sometimes it just breaks.

[–]Timthetiny 0 points1 point  (0 children)

PhD = Permanent Head Damage.

Coming from a former grad student

[–]Pastelitomaracucho 2 points3 points  (3 children)

Have you ever been to conferences PhDs and PhD candidates in conferences? everyone fucks everything that moves like you have no idea. Half of them with boyfriends or husbands.

Just a quick heads up.

[–]banjew 2 points3 points  (2 children)

I have almost 20 years of experience going to conferences full of PhD and grad students. I think I'm going to the wrong conferences because if there is sex, nobody knows.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Poor man. No man deserves that... I don’t care if he was the most beta guy ever.

I’m never getting married.

[–]circlingldn 4 points5 points  (2 children)

heres a simple fucking solution, marry someone that isnt a fucking deadbeat wife, more women go to college and more women study pharmacy/nursing etc

[–]Johnnyvile 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This is a problem most guys have. They go for really low level women. Don’t marry the woman that is working at a low level service industry job that is likely over 25. They’re always going to want easy money and a sense of empowerment. I bet this women was already working at Starbucks and living with her parents when he met her. He didn’t marry a woman he married the equivalent of teenager at an adult age and her “rebellious” attitude is showing by dying her hair and going feminist.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes I don't think all men are going to give up on marriage because there is just too much cultural history and tradition behind it, and because many men do in fact want to settle down. I do think that the greatest irony of all is going to happen though - going forward, it is going to become women who have to be big earners in order to get commitment.

[–]erzakai 6 points7 points  (2 children)

I wanna get married because I don’t just want to be banging random chicks for the rest of my life ya know. At some point I want security and sameness but these marriage horror stories and seeing stuff like this happen firsthand with my parents scares me.

[–]writewhereileftoff 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Yeah that's called an LTR. No contracts or ceremony needed. As if marriage guarantrees security and stability lol that's what everyone here is trying to point out.

[–]Pastelitomaracucho 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Sameness and boredom will eventually kick in. If you or your partner are still attractive and get yourselves into situations where infidelity can happen, it will happen. Might be you, might be her.

You don't need to bang random chicks for life. You can simply jump from relationship to relationship as soon as they start losing the kick. Once we are old, tired and ugly enough to stop that, then maybe we can start thinking about setting down.

[–]bluedragon2388 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I can bet everything this dude ignored red flags, probably was a doormat of a sort, became complacent, went into the relationship on her terms

While possible, I doubt a traditional woman or a woman with no red flags would dye her hair fucking blue, cheat while pregnant, run off with feminists, etc.

Now she’s definitely at fault but don’t ignore the fact that the guy might’ve made some retarded but common mistakes.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (5 children)

Let's play: Who Wants to be a married fool?

Fiancé tried to poison me, can you guess why?:

A) She loved me but wasn't in love anymore

B) She was secretly in love with someone else

C)She was afraid of what I might do when I found out about her lover

D)I was forcing/guilt tripping her into a relationship with me.

Anyone?

[–]TheRedPrince99 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Made me tear up. Yet the media will never fucking cover this as it does not serve the feminine imperative. Seriously.... shit like this makes my blood boil and very angry. The times... they be changin’

[–]yummyluckycharms 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Its sad but at least his pain will end soon. I dont think he has the money to flee to another country even, which usually requires at least 10k.

[–]bigsmallkev 1 point2 points  (2 children)

I’m curious to all my brothers out there from culturally Asian backgrounds, where the talk of marriage creeps up on you and takes over the dinner table conversation the moment you turn of age, how do you deal with the talk that you’ll have to have years to come on the inevitability of no marriage to your conservative, sheltered, delusional parents?

[–]upstairstraffic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I never say anything I'm currently 22 so the pressure isn't on yet but provided I marry within the same ethnicity then they don't seem too fussed. In reality, they don't realise I don't give 2 fucks what they think and will do what I want.

[–]BiteAndThrow 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you were financially independent you wouldn't be asking these kind of questions.

[–]snapreader 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Pretty sure this is how murder made me famous, got its start. I cant tell if the sub as a whole is cynical or there are really a crap ton of shitty females out there. Ive been doing my homework & the game seems rigged, very rarely if ever in the mans favor. Keep your head up op...btw js moving out of the country an option? Like an automatic do-over?

[–]NoJobs 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Jesus, I'm going through a divorce now. It's really not a big deal because we don't have kids, but I can feel his pain. I have to try my best to keep my ex-wife calm and amicable because at any moment she could flip and try to go after a lot of my money and income. It's a fucked up situation. My lawyer told me she can also require me to pay HER lawyer fees. What the fuck?

[–]1atticusfinch1973 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Another strategy is to only get into LTRs with women who are financially successful but submissive and check all the other red pill boxes for a good mate.

I’m divorced and with shared custody my ex actually pays ME child support because according to my tax return I make less than she does. Learn how to hide your money properly.

My current main plate makes six figures and has massive savings but knows her place and I have excellent control over the relationship. It’s an ideal scenario if things go long term.

[–]Millixaw 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just a PSA that child custody payments can affect unmarried guys.

Condoms... hell, vasectomies.

[–]Gozsayin 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I would rather flee the country then pay child support for a cheating wife

[–]alt-prtsc 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was already set financially. She would have a hard time challenging the prenup, considering she essentially wrote most of it.

I have given her my name, so she is under constant scrutiny. Everything she says and does, her looks and style, her feminine graces, now all of it is a reflection of me. And not just me, but of my family and my business.

Over time, being unavoidably indispensable for some aspects of my business, she will experience all manner of shit. Seduction attempts by capable men, blackmail, threats, emotional pressure, and other charming behavior.

She is responsible for raising our children. When they are old enough to begin understanding who I am and what I do, I’ll take a more active role. But I’ll never be too familiar. I’ll provide a role model, she’s responsible for everything else.

Those are some of the demands of the role she has undertaken.

Me? I basically keep doing what I was doing pre-marriage.

I like being married. Maybe I won’t forever, but right now it’s amazing.

[–]PS2Errol 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No reason why any man should get married now. Life is too short to play russian roulette with marriage.

[–]af_007 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh my God, thanks because I'm divorced but with no kids. Marriage no more!

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Real life is more chilling than any horror movie. I cant imagine what he has been through. Hopefully he has now seen there are still people out there support him. We need to help eachother out in the society we live in.

[–]YoungManHHF 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Holy shit man this is degrading. I hope that guy turns out alright at the end

[–]tolerantman 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Why didn't he take the bitch with him, if he is going to commit suicide?

[–]tenteddoobie1 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Marriage is a legal way to steal from each other. Feel your pain. My state is exactly the same and did the exact same to me. Finally after three years though with "No" job theu were forced to drop it to the minimum and report to them when I come up with a job. Only thing I can say is hang in there and it will get better

[–]SKRedPill 4 points5 points  (2 children)

To really understand what true abundance feels like, one needs to think about how you're gonna dealing with old age, disease, loss of work, money, your home, degeneration, dependence, isolation and death. And let me get the bad news out of the way first -- these things are the curse of the earth and they WILL come to you, sooner or later, if you're not ready.

What I see is that when a lot of men cross 50-60 and their testosterone declines, they start getting these fears. Most younger people marry and start families from this needy point of origin -- only to see that their fears attracted the very thing they fear. As men, we need to figure out how we're going to face these, it's not if, but when.

These fears when not addressed, keeps a man trapped and bound, hurts his confidence and abundance mentality, and it'll force you to build your life around a needy paradigm. The thought at the very bottom of your mind, is the one that'll come true.

Now how's that relevant to TRP? This. You cannot fully discover the things that make you a high value attractive man -- fearlessness, power, confidence and abundance without a healthy frame and a way of living that addresses these.

PS : And the first step one can do is -- yes, LIFT!

[–]born_for_this 2 points3 points  (0 children)

But then, what is your advice for dealing with old age, disease, loss of work, money, your home, degeneration, dependence, isolation and death? How can a man prepare for these eventualities?

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (7 children)

Honest question, if marriage is completely out of the question what's the solution to procreating? I seems to me that having multiple children out-of-wedlock would be way more expensive?

[–]askmrcia 0 points1 point  (4 children)

There really is no solution. So this is people will continue to marry, even guys that frequent this sub. It's a risk worth taking I guess

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children)

I am of the belief that modern feminism/liberalism is the way it is for the specific purpose of destroying the possibility of healthy long term relationships between men and women which would produce fully capable and capacitated adults.

I'm noticing the TRP doesn't answer this issue, in fact it seems to exploit the situation, making it worse.

If sex is all this sub wants, cool, but if everyone is doubling down hard 24/7 the only outcome is hell.

Men, true men, should want more than just sex, they should want to be able to cultivate a good number of zero or low n-count women from whom to choose for a future life, not just high n-count harems for sex until their dicks fall off.

So if TRP is only offering a sex strategy, long term effects might be worse for all.

[–]askmrcia 0 points1 point  (0 children)

All good points and yes I agree with you.

I believe most men here and in general would be cool with just a monogamous relationship.

The problem is that attempting to go that route would mean the guys will end up getting post wall women to marry them.

The red pill is teaching guys they have two choices. Either marry a chick who had far more sex partners thenyourself while she settles for you and you give her your reslurces. Or have sex with many women as you want and not give them any resources and commitment.

Doing the latter is not helping, but the former is making things much worse. If guys just end up being perm bachelors then maybe women will wise up (they wont) and start being traditional again.

[–]ilovecadence 0 points1 point  (1 child)

This sub refuses to acknowledge the true redpill, which is WHY society is the way it is, and that advocation of "plate spinning" and avoiding marriage and MGTOW etc is quite literally accelerating the intended degradation of human civilisation and is falling straight into the playbook of those who are orchestrating all of this. Be as "redpill" as you want about women but without the understanding of WHY things are the way they are you are still blue beyond comprehension and you are lost

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay Yes, I can agree to that POV. A part of me almost wants to say it is a conspiracy, a necessary conspiracy for many, but one none the less. And like Neo and Morpheus walking past the lady in Red(Pill), even hinting at it is targeted with Billy-Beta-Baby-Fever over here here.

Out of curiosity, when you say ...

the true redpill,

you mean ... ?

(PM if you feel it will cause backlash)

[–]dontbethatguynow 1 points1 points [recovered]

I wondered this similarly, Prenups pehaps? its a good bet but also not fool proof.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just it seems that without legal provisioning, the natural trust that once exited in a more natural way.

[–]banjew 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sorry but I don't see this having anything to do with marriage. It can happen to you if you knock out any bitch, marriage or not.

[–]2Dmva100 0 points1 point  (2 children)

All men that marry in todays age are submisisve cucks who miss the authoritative reign of their single mothers and want a woman-boss clown thingy. If you get married you are gay because you are going to get fucked in the asshole that will soon become very salty and you will be forced to try the lower sodium version of the State's Sausage, and even that will come with a price tag attached.

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

All men that marry in todays age are submisisve cucks who miss the authoritative reign of their single mothers and want a woman-boss clown thingy.

lol well there you have it fellas

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's right! Don't marry and raise children. Stay a bachelor till the day you die and leave nothing behind after you because you read some bad divorce stories on the internet. That's the real redpill.

[–]invaderdim325 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Swallowed the red pill after similar situation good thing I didn't knock her up though.

[–]BurningOrangeHeaven 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't get it. If that child support bullshit happened to me like that i would just take my savings and peace out to a different country. What makes guys stay in a fucked up scenario like that...

[–]Linoran 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Still wanna get married?

Still wanna bet "your life and everything in it" on the turn of a card in order to win "she gets a ring and a princess party, and you keep the relationship you have now"?

How many more corpses do you need to see?

But...I found a unicorn.

[–]SKRedPill 0 points1 point  (1 child)

You should see what kind of books SJWs and feminists read these days...

[–]notbot7789 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am so sorry women in our culture are so immoral its digusting im 20 i don't bother with women at the moment because of this

[–]yomo86[🍰] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The punishment for founding a family is 18 years for a misdemeanor and life for an intentional felony. Don't be so stupid.

[–]GrotusMaximus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not that the sentiment isn't correct, but the OP in the quoted post was outed as a huge troll; a racist and jew-hating shitposter. His account is most likely fake.

[–]patriargate 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Crazy. But really crazy. Could Trump do something about it?

[–]PoorlyTimedPun 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Curious what state this is in cause that's not at all how child support works (at least in mine). If unpaid for 90 days they take your license. They'll garnish wages but no jail time. Also you can pretty much file your own custody paperwork and they use a fancy support calculator to figure it out, any morons dog could see this is an absurd amount and have it redone.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

What about signing a pre-nup?

[–]oG_Wookie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What's the deal with just getting a prenup? Still legally in for an ass pounding later enless highly specific or? Also got married young and daughter is about to turn 1. Trying to convert to redpill more but slow gains. Our wedding was small thankfully but if a divorce is eminent I'd still get fucked over.

[–]BurnoutRS 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Not at all. my wife took our baby when she dyed her hair blue..." fucking died, Im not even past the first sentence and im dead

jiminy fuckballs though, this guy should actually flee the country. like, at some point you have to accept that you've only been given one life. alot of us were lucky enough to have some kind of shephard to guide us through the retard younger years and prevent us from committing some irreversible fuckup. Then you reach this point where you're making decisions for yourself. you start off with all this potential, you're like 18-20 ish and gradually the decisions you make start to limit and take away that potential.

you choose a career path and doors close, you buy land somewhere and tie yourself up, you get married and you close off a fuckload off doors. I look at marriage as a fucking disability. I have a brain injury thats going to follow me for the rest of my life. Im a potential liability to any employer should they put me in a position where my cognitive impairments could make me a danger for others or the company. Thats closed some doors off for me. thank fuck I didnt get fucked up more in the accident. Would you rather lose your legs or have to pay a bitch 1000 dollars a month? at least with the 1000 a month you can fuck off to some country. that might as well be a death warrant in the country it was issued in. There's nothing there for you anymore. You had one life and guess what, you went and got married, divorced, and lost your america privileges (or wherever)

this guy wont abdicate. he'll eat a bullet, or find a way to keep paying. it's shit honestly. I feel for him because, like me, he probably didnt have anybody there to say "listen women are fucked and you should make it your priority not to make any decisions that are going to seriously effect the rest of your life before you've really figured out what you want that life to be" and a little bit of "there are some things in life that are permanent. among them are death, disability, herpes and child support"

[–]redd_reality 0 points1 point  (0 children)

180 day prison sentence for missed child support payment. Ahaha afraid I'd have to call societies bluff on that one.

They send him away, he becomes an expense to the state, along with the his wife and child. He stops working and contributes zero in income tax etc.

This system is laughable and I'd just as quick laugh in the judges face and tell him to do his worst. You may fuck me up, but you won't take my dignity or self respect.

[–]Blackkillerjoe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can't belive this, I really want to insult her, but I know we're better than this. We need to reform the law. Stop with this feminism. Let's search for real equality. No more men down. We must unite brothers

[–]1Entropy-7 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you are rich, get an agreement that makes sure you pay the lawyers more than her. If you are poor, stay poor and you can't be gauged later (actually incorrect, usless men married to useless women have been hit with huge alimony even if they made it big once freed from their shackles.)

[–]ben1324 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I absolutely want kids.... is there any way to make this work

[–]IClogToilets 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The OP is full of shit. He is trolling and a bunch if idiots fell for it. Yes there is a way to make it work. Best thing to do is marry someone who earn about or more than what you make and fight for 50/50 custody. Don't be tricked into 51/49. Kids are like stocks. Whoever controls 51% controls 100% of the money.

50/50 and if you both make similar amounts of money, you will both be contributing equal.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If that shit happens I’m moving to Thailand or Ecuador lol.

[–]imheregonow004 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Marriage itself isn't a bad idea. Its the culture nowadays that puts people of it. Far too much financial restrictions on the man by people of law.

[–]1v1crown 0 points1 point  (2 children)

The main reason I won't get married is that restraining orders can be filed whenever and divorce can be filed whenever. Marriage has been weaponized.

[–]Tito312 0 points1 point  (1 child)

If you're not a wife beating pussy then there should be no reason to have a restraining order. Also, don't date, fuck, or marry raging cunts you reprobates

[–]acekilo 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Marriage is for Government Support!! Fuck the stupid court system. 3rd world countries aren't like this!!!

[–]t1g3rsh4rk 0 points1 point  (5 children)

This kind of ruined my day. It's unconscionable how unfair the system is. I feel awful for this guy.

[–]IClogToilets 1 point2 points  (1 child)

The OP is full of shit. It is a troll post. Fight for your rights and you will be fine.

[–]Tito312 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Or, just use common sense. Remember, there are two sides to a story and you already arrived to a conclusion by just listening to one side.

[–]Tito312 0 points1 point  (2 children)

I don't cause I am more than one dimensional

[–]t1g3rsh4rk 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Yet you suggest someone is one dimensional for having a feeling of empathy toward someone else in a specific situation.

That's like ... the ultimate example of one dimensional thinking.

[–]Tito312 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Actually, I use the term one dimensional because I question the veracity of his post. I cannot reach a conclusion without details, and the largest detail left out was the other person's side of the story. I don't believe anything unless I'm certain of it. Let's be model Americans and strive to hear both sides of an issue and question everything.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can still not be married and pay child support

[–]acekilo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Last time I heard the name Tito was in Belize. He was gay and he ended up dead. My country don't tolerate batty man!!!! Pussy Hole!!!!!

[–]Theguygotgame777 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I used to wonder why people didn’t want women to have rights.

It’s because they knew women would abuse them.

[–]bigsmallkev 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m 21. I don’t ever plan to get married and don’t see any benefits of it. I’ve just put that out there so they can take it in for themselves and allow for me to take in their reactions, they brush it off with a sarcastic laugh but little do they know I’m just feeling the same thing as you. Thanks brother.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My story is not much different than OP's. This is a devastating thing to read and it drags up a lot of harsh memories for me. While I would like to think that my demeanor out in the world is still reasonable and decent, when I get online I am an asshole. I have developed a deep seated hatred for foolishness and ignorance. Any slight thing can piss me off. I used to be a lot more tolerant.

Even people here on TRP anger me at times. It seems that when you get treated this way by systems and people you deeply trusted, your view of everything changes permanently. That is why I keep coming here - to remind me of those moments and keep me frosty.

On another note - I nearly quit my dream profession to work off the books so that they could not get my pay. There are ways to do this and you can look it up. It would be dramatic and a lifelong decision, but at least you would be able to live and maybe even thrive despite this mess. But keep in mind, the people who made this happen are also taking away gun rights and freedom of speech. So they are not messing around.

I wish you well /u/Whisper.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This reminds me of this story from Terrence Popp.

[–]diagnosedADHD 0 points1 point  (0 children)

One woman did something shitty so they all must be worthless sluts

I plan on happily marrying my SO, we both have a bright future ahead of us, and I really look forward to having someone to spend the rest of my life with. Nothing brings me more joy than thinking of spending my life with my SO. I hope one day you guys find someone who will make you see that. We're not at war, lads.

[–]WholesomeAwesome 0 points1 point  (0 children)

lol wtf I wouldn't have paid a single CS payment. By the time they get me, me and all my assets have already boarded the SS galactic transnational legal and financial master race.

[–]atifhere 0 points1 point  (0 children)

LOL LOL LOL at your western society. I will get married, I will make children with my wife. She is gonna raise them. Cook and clean our home. If she's gonna misbehave, I can simply send her back to her home where her parents will teach her how to behave. If she will cheat, then she better make sure it that she won't get caught because she will be getting a divorce and no one marries a cheating woman here. Even the widow or respectfully divorced woman don't get to have a high status man.

This is the normal state of affairs. A man is simply a dominant force. A woman is submissive. Is it such a taboo thing for your society to accept. I think you guys deserve it, you bring it upon yourself.

Women are fine as fuck, they are as moral as a man. They cheat like men cheat. They want to survive like a man wants to. There is no problem with them. You guys just happen to reward women for cheating. So its fucking very much obvious and natural for an organism to do things that reward them. I can't just stop laughing at you guys.

Man up and stand for yourself and change the system. Or get the fuck out of your country. A western man can easily have a luxurious life in most of the sane countries. Or the least you can do is stop fucking supporting the system.

My men can't even imagine a woman disrespecting or cheating. Rewarding a woman for cheating, and punishing a man for being a loyal man is like imagining some harry potter level fantasy shit, they both can't be possibly real.

[–]_0W0_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If the author reads this, please write to the Iconoclast, good outlet of good people: https://www.iconoclast-media.com/magazine/