"Why the fuck do guys keep trying to understand women when we can't even understand ourselves". - one of my plates.
Sober for this one so hopefully it's a bit more coherent. And it's going to be long. But fuck you, read it. It may be one of my most important posts to date, and a lot of you retards need it.
Got a lot of salt in my last post, from terpers and angry feminist soyboys alike. God do I love that shit, maybe I have a bit too much Milo in me but I take a special glee out of stirring shit up and then being called an autist faggot by losers on the internet.
Autist indeed. I won't even deny it. Sure I may not have a diagnoses, but there's always been something "odd" about the way I've operated in the world, I never really got along with the normal kids and I didn't really get why... why was I weird? Did I think differently to the way other people think? Was I just stupider than everyone without realising? Was it that I was much smarter than them and so couldn't fit in properly? Is the internal wiring of my head just... different?
The answer to all of these questions is: yes. And eventually I found out why.
The Extreme Male Brain theory of Autism posits that Autism, which is overwhelmingly found in males, is a byproduct of a brain structure that leans heavily on the "male" mode of operating, that is, systemisation.
The author argues that the autistic male has an overwhelming ability to systemise the world around him, a result being superior abilities in mathematics, engineering, music, construction, games, science etc. But this comes at a price; a dominant male brain results in an underdeveloped and underused female brain.
And what does the female brain do? It empathises. It is heavily, heavily fine tuned to understand and navigate the social world of humans; far better than the male brain ever could.
This will be the main focus of this post; the battle between systemising and empathising that takes place; in our own heads and in the sexual marketplace.
If you have access, I suggest you read the above article first. The author explains the concepts very well and makes a good case for over-systemisation in autistic men. I also got to give credit to my ex-LTR for this post, because, being a psychology student, she was the one who introduced me to this article and these concepts.
The Systemising Autist
The author defines Systemising as such:
‘Systemising’ is the drive to analyse the variables in a system, to derive the underlying rules that govern the behaviour of a system. Systemising also refers to the drive to construct systems. Systemising allows you to predict the behaviour of a system, and to control it. I review evidence that, on average, males spontaneously systemise to a greater degree than do females
By a ‘system’, I mean anything that takes inputs and deliver outputs. When you systemise, you use ‘if–then’ (correlation) rules. The brain focuses in on a detail or parameter of the system, and observes how this varies. That is, it treats a feature as a variable. Or a person actively manipulates this variable (hence the English word, systematically). They note the effect(s) of this one input elsewhere in the system (i.e. the output). ‘If I do x, then y happens’. Systemising therefore needs an exact eye for detail.
Systemising is an inductive process. You watch what happens each time, gathering data about an event from repeated sampling, often quantifying differences in some variables within the event and their correlation with variation in outcome. After confirming a reliable pattern of association – generating predictable results – you form a rule about how this aspect of the system works. When an exception occurs, the rule is refined or revised; otherwise, the rule is retained.
Systemising works for phenomena that are indeed ultimately lawful, finite and deterministic. The explanation is exact and its truth-value is defeasible. (e.g. ‘The light went on because switch A was in the down position’). Systemising is of almost no use, however, when it comes to predicting moment-by-moment changes in a person's behaviour. To predict human behaviour, empathising is required. Systemising and empathising are entirely different kinds of processes.
(Baron-Cohen, 2002) Not the Baron-Cohen, but his cousin.
To put in plain English, when you systemise, you find the patterns in the chaos of the world, and use these patterns to make predictions and theories. You then use these predictions and theories to help navigate the world successfully, adjusting and fine-tuning the framework you have built for yourself as you go.
As men, we are very, very good at systemising. It's what defines us from women, and what separates stupid men from smart men.
We are all capable of systemisng, some of us are better at it then most, autists take it to pathological (or savant) levels. And it's really important. Without the ability to systemise, we cannot make sense of the world, it is just way too chaotic.
Because it was the systemising autistic cavemen who first looked at the white dots in the night sky and started noticing patterns. The cavewomen were oblivious.
"I'm telling you Mom, there's patterns in them. I swear"
"No there aren't, they're all just random little dots, Ug, now stop overthinking it"
"No I swear mom, I've been watching them every single night. Look, that one there looks like a hand... and that one, a tree"
"Stop being stupid, you're just dreaming. Why can't you just go foraging like the other kids"
"But mom it might mean something! It can't just all be a coincidence... look, that one has moved since we last saw it"
"It means nothing, now stop wasting my time. -sigh- I knew I should have breastfed you"
Newton, an aspergic incel, manipulated the laws of the universe into his very own system of mathematics. Magnus Carlsson plays 10 simultaneous chess games in his head without even looking at a board.
In fact, Chess is a good way of explaining how systemising can take multiple different levels
Because while chess is a system in itself, you won't do well unless you meta-systemise the game. It's not enough to just know that the Rook is better than the Knight. To systemise chess, you start assigning points to the pieces; 1 for a pawn, 3 for a knight or bishop, 5 for a rook and so on. This isn't actually part of the game, but it's a new system you created for yourself in order to help you achieve. Take it further and start learning the optimal moves for the openings, learning which squares are important to attack, splitting the game into opening/mid/late game.
Chess, and gaming in general, is so systemised, that there's no wonder that we need two different chess leagues; One for women, and one for men. Women have literally no chance in competing with us in a systemising battle.
Game of Life
I've always been a heavy gamer. Not just video games, which I'm sure we've all overindulged in at one point; but board games, TCGs, flash-games, arcades; anything really that required me to figure out the system of the game, and beat it. I enjoyed that shit so much and still do. It's what I did a lot as a kid.
Eventually, as I grew older, I started to become more and more depressed, and more of a loser. It started to become obvious to me that sex and relationships were an important part of life, and so was money, and power... and I was losing this game, that's what was making me depressed, the realisation that I was losing.
Because a game it was. There's only one game that we all have to play, whether we want to or not, the Game of Life.
We're born into the Game of Life and we play it until we die. Some of us win the game; spreading our genes, making children, climbing the ladder and becoming more powerful than our parents were. Some of us win very well, and become CEO billionaires with harems of women. Some of us die in our moms basement with a hand around our dick and a rope around our neck.
How do these guys do it then? How did they win the game?
Well first of all, they realised that there was a game in the first place. Some people coast through their whole lives never realising that they're in fierce competition with everyone around them. They end up mediocre.
Next, they constructed systems in their life to win the game. This includes things like a strict workout schedule, good sleep habits, little time wasted not building their lives, and an autistic level of determination and willpower.
They also managed to notice systems in the world as clues to their direction: people who abuse drugs never normally turn out well, good investing is a quick way to make money, getting onto the property ladder ASAP is of utmost importance, being a pushover at work will never land you a promotion. Noticing these patterns and employing them is what helped these men win.
And importantly, they learned to split the Game of Life into it's constituent mini-games, systems in themselves. Mini-games include the Game of Health, the Game of Money, the Game of Power, and the Game of Love. (Not an exhaustive list, and we all play different minigames)
All of these have been systemised pretty well over the centuries, with philosophy, books, science, schooling etc. We've learnt what works and what doesn't, through analysis and trial-and-error, and we've passed down the information.
All of these except one however: the Game of Love.
Love, Women and the Sexual Marketplace are so wild, chaotic and unpredictable that it's been so hard for us to learn how they work, we've in the past just said "fuckit" and scrapped the game entirely and created our own; we used Marriage, Chastity, Religion and the like to help give us some control over what is otherwise a crazy sub-world of pain, hardship and unpredictability.
Well, whether you think it's a good thing or not, that structure has now collapsed, and we're back to where we were before, not understanding the enigma that is women and suffering heavily in the Game of Love because of it.
Because the winners in the Game of Love are those that can embrace its chaotic randomness and use it to aid their solipsism. The ones who ENJOY the social warfare and drama that comes with it.
So as men, we're losing, and have been for a long time. Without the ability to systemise the game of love, we're at a loss for what to do.
Except we're not anymore. We did manage to systemise the sexual marketplace.
It's called "The Red Pill".
The Red Pill is a collective effort by men to systemise the sexual marketplace into an understandable and navigable framework
Just like the old scientists and philosophers of the past, we find the patterns in our own lives, share them with others, and compare notes on what works and what doesn't. Over time, the truth rises to the top, and a system is built, with it's own philosophies (AWALT, you are the prize etc) and jargon (AF/BB, Hypergamy, etc) and leaders (Rollo/RSD etc). Sure, it's not exactly "hard science" (queue the soyboys "POST PEER REVIEWED STUDIES ELSE NOTHING YOU SAY IS CORRECT") but it doesn't need to be. Aristotle and Plato did not rigorously follow a scientific method, and they were wrong about a lot of shit, yet are still some of the most intelligent, and correct men to ever exist.
TRP is systemisation of women and sex. This is why you, as the above-average intelligence, slightly autistic beta male, are so drawn to it. This is why you love the jargon and the field reports and the theory posts. With every new post you read, you are adopting and fine-tuning a system in your head that will help you navigate the world, win the Game of Love, and ultimately, the Game of Life.
TRP is super, super important for males in today's world, because without a system of guidelines to follow, you will lose to women (who play this game like second nature and don't need help) every single time.
Count yourself lucky you stumbled across this place early, or at all. Some men never will.
The need for Empathy
Women play the Game of Life, just like us. But they play a much, much easier version.
To win the Game of Life as a woman, all you need to do is win one minigame, the Game of Love.
In fact, a woman will never be able to compete with men in any of the other minigames, they do not have the intelligence, drive, or systemising power to so. Any woman who tries to compete with men in their games quickly realises that she will never win.
But they don't need to win these games, win the Game of Love as a woman, and you've won everything else. Find yourself a provider, get yourself some good genes for your offspring (regardless if they come from the provider) and raise the kids well. Boom, you win. So much easier than having to build yourself into a machine of destruction and risk your life in the war that is the real world. That's the males job.
So, because of this, women have evolved to maximise their abilities in the sexual marketplace, sacrificing other, non essential qualities (like physical strength, high IQ etc) in order to do so.
Women min/max their abilities. Nothing matters to them except a few important skills; manipulation, deceit, devotion and support; but these all stem from the same base characteristic skill: Empathy.
Here is the definition of empathy from the article above:
‘Empathising’ is the drive to identify another person's emotions and thoughts, and to respond to these with an appropriate emotion. Empathising allows you to predict a person's behaviour, and to care about how others feel. In this article, I review evidence that on average, females spontaneously empathise to a greater degree than do males.
The female has an uncanny, almost scary ability, to empathise with the people around her. This means that not only can she feel what they feel, she can also understand their mood, their body language and their unconscious communication patterns far better than themselves.
The female, especially the high empathising female, has a superpower. She can basically read your mind without you realising it. You might think you've got good frame or pokerface, but a well adjusted female will see right through you.
We, as males, will never be able to understand just how good women are at this, we can never comprehend. Just like your girlfriend will never beat you at chess, or can't even use two thumbsticks on an Xbox controller to navigate a game character (anyone else notice this?), you will never know the mechanism for how she can always tell when you're lying, hiding something, or upset.
For all intents and purposes, women are psychic compared to men.
And it is this superpower that women are using to destroy you in the Game of Love.
Try it, take this test and see how you score. Women always score better at this kind of shit. Now this is just one test so don't take it to mean anything concrete, but it gives you a general idea to our relative abilities.
And because of this, because she can empathise and understand you so well, she can manipulate you to extents you're painfully unaware of.
And she uses this empathy, this psychic mind reading, and this manipulation, to win her game. And we're the losers, because we play with a handicap.
In order to overcome that handicap (a handicap we once had under control by limiting women's hypergamy and sexuality) the manosphere was born, and then TRP, and then the women found out. And they hated it.
Women hate TRP for these reasons:
They cannot systemise the way we do, so do not understand fully the systems we create, or why we even do it. Because they empathise, they mostly see people as individuals, not as groups, and cannot make generalisations (which is important for predictive systemising) and cannot even SEE the patterns, let alone understand them. In their solipsism, their world is much smaller than ours, confined to their immediate surroundings and the people they know, hence they cannot see "the bigger picture". This is why teenage girls in europe line up to welcome the muslim "refugees" (their future rapists) into their countries; because they truly do not see them as a block of invading rapists, and instead consider each man as an individual with dreams and struggle and humanity. You cannot, and should never empathise with your enemy, because then you will never defeat him. You MUST dehumanise the enemy.
They do not NEED the systems like we do. They see us writing these long-ass posts and the complicated jargon and think "wtf do these losers need to analyse all this shit for? It's not that difficult seriously". And it's true, to women, this all comes natural; they don't NEED to learn how to do it, so they have contempt for those that do. They want us to "just get it" like they do, not understanding that we don't even know what to get. We NEED to systemise to understand. Its our nature.
It threatens their feminine imperative; massively. They've basically been cheating at this game up until now, covertly playing a second meta-game underneath us that we had no idea of. Now that the wool has been removed from our eyes and we're starting to learn how they work, and how to combat it, they are freaking out. They use their shaming tactics to try and bully us back into submission, because we threaten their position as winners in the game. But we know better than to give up at the slightest hint of resistance, in fact, it's the one thing that tells us we're on the right path.
The Hyper-Feminine Brain
If the autist is the hyper-masculine brain, with a pathological level of systemisation, than surely there must be a female equivalent? The author of the article posits that these women should exist, those with a hyper-feminine brain and little ability to systemise. Do these girls exist?
Of course. We call them Borderlines.
The BPD girl lives in a chaotic world with only herself at the center. There is no system for this girl, just wild erratic emotionalism. The BPD is fiercely insecure and terrified of the world because she cannot make sense of it, she cannot systemise and NEEDS men in her life to lean on in support. She sees all as individuals, and cannot generalise. This may be a noble thing, but it leads to her relationships being unpredictable and impulsive, and lots of poor decision making. She finds it very hard to abandon people, as she is terrified of abandonment herself; so will string guys along not only for her own ego, but in order to avoid hurting them. Having people be angry/disappointed/ignore her terrifies the BPD.
But the BPD makes up for all this with her superhuman levels of empathetic understanding. She feels what you feel, she "gets" you within the first few lines of conversation, her eyes, which you cannot maintain prolonged contact with lest they burn a hole in you, can see into your soul and asses you with a few seconds. She knows exactly what to say and which buttons to press, and when she fucks you.... well...
Does the BPD ever use this superpower for good?
No, she uses it to crush everyone in her path as she rises up the world and wins her Game of Life.
This is why it's so very hard to game a borderline; because there's no faking it. She will know whether you're the real deal instantly, she will see through the fake alpha pickup artist bullshit immediately. And in fact, this is the main barrier that a lot of you are facing when it comes to getting laid, and if you're going to take any thing way from this post, the next section is the most important bit.
Oversytemising and Underempathising
So when I posted a screenshot in my last post with a conversation I had with the gym girl (in order to shut up the "fake and gay" faggots) I got a lot more faggots telling me that I was beta in the conversation and that I said the wrong lines and that I shouldn't have said this and should have instead said that and bla bla bla
These people are missing a huge aspect of game and will suffer because of it. And it's not just them, there are a lot of you kids who do it too.
While TRP is the best thing that could have happened for you in terms of learning how the SMP works, and it has helped a lot of men; too many of you dogmatically follow the rules and oversystemise.
You treat the whole thing as if it's some strict game/competition with rules and guidelines that MUST be followed, and results are guaranteed should you follow the playbook correctly.
These are the guys who make a million asktrp posts asking "how do I be alpha" or will post a FR about how they did all the right things with a girl and pulled all the correct moves they learnt yet it still didn't work! "How could it not work?" They cry. "I followed the textbook perfectly"
In fact, pick up artistry is a great example of this over-sytemisation. You use the same canned lines and routines and repeat over and over, hoping you will eventually get a hit.
But there's a reason women find pick-up artistry or spergy TRP betas gross and offputting. In fact I do to.
It's because THEY SEE RIGHT THROUGH YOU.
Remember, women are PSYCHIC. When you open a girl, she will be able to tell instantly, from subtle queues you didn't even know you were giving off, whether you're the real deal or not.
She will see past the fake frame.
She will notice the lines you rehearsed in the mirror.
She will see your nerves and your pedestalisation of her. It might not be obvious to you, you think you're hiding it well, but it's clear as day for this bitch.
And more importantly, she will see instantly that you are not treating her like a human and instead seeing her only as a sex object.
And this makes her hate you more than anything.
Because if you're using canned lines on a girl, or being super-forward, or putting on a fucking act like a jester, what you're doing is ignoring the actual person in front of you and are seeing her as just a vagina to be won.
In your inability to empathise properly, you have removed all traces of humanity from her.
No girl wants to feel like a fucktoy to be used.
No girl will fuck a guy who considers her meat.
No girl can respect a guy who only sees her for her sexual value.
And she will see it, I guarantee it. You are less subtle than you think, she will see it in your eyes.
Law 48: Assume Formlessness
When you oversystemise, you will become way too rigid in your approach. She is not a machine where, if you press the right buttons and say the right things, she will yield. If only it was that easy.
Sometimes, even though a Rook is worth more than a Knight, the right play is to make the trade. Adjust your game for every girl, remain fluid and adaptable. Do not dogmatically follow rules.
From the article:
Systemising is of almost no use, however, when it comes to predicting moment-by-moment changes in a person's behaviour. To predict human behaviour, empathising is required. Systemising and empathising are entirely different kinds of processes.
While TRP is great and all for everything outside of the physical interaction (building frame, learning to lift, gaining stoicism, picking up IOIs), it will not help you during the actual conversations you have with girls. You do not have time to analyse everything she says or read her behaviour moment-by-moment. For that you need empathy.
You want to game a girl properly? First you gotta treat her like a real person. Learn to EMPATHISE.
Now, before the snowflakes and landwhales on TBP start joyfully masturbating, no this does not mean I've suddenly converted. I still think women are stupid children, and the TRP system is still incredibly correct and accurate for predicting and understanding female behaviour. But children deserve respect too.
I won't take credit for the next line because I read it somewhere on this subreddit, but paraphrased, the really good advice is this:
"When you meet a girl and she's giving you the bitch shields and shit tests, don't get too fazed; just try and imagine the little girl behind the makeup and push up bra. The dorky girl with the glasses sitting around the Christmas tree with her family opening presents."
Empathise with the girl and try and imagine what she's going through/thinking/feeling at this moment. Sure, it won't be easy and we don't have the natural skills women do, but it's still a skill that can be learnt. Consider her age and where she's from, and how rich her life must be; full of experiences and happiness and hardships that have shaped her into the being you see in front of you. A whole other human with a whole other inner voice.
When you do this, when you start embodying this ethos, seeing people for the humans they are (instead of objects to be used/fucked), it will seep out of your pores and the women will smell it. They will see it in your eyes, they will know you are the real thing; that unicorn of a man who "just gets it".
And you will stop needing to follow the dogmatic strict rules you were using before, because then the game will just come naturally. You will be able to talk to the girl without getting nervous, you won't have to think of witty things to say, the whole dynamic will feel organic and normal; for her, "it just happened".
You need to first befriend the girl. This is important. She won't fuck you if she can't see herself spending nonsexual time with you and still having a good time. If you don't "click" as friends, sex isn't happening.
And once again, she will notice if you're unable to see her humanity.
The guys who get laid, a lot, and with high-tier women, are the guys who are able to connect with women on this level. When you see a ugly guy with a 10 on his arm, I guarantee you it's not just frame and money that got him the girl, but the connection they have that isn't visible on the outside.
And girls need this connection. They CRAVE it like we crave pussy. And so they will settle for below average looks guys who treat them like real sentient beings if other options don't exist.
People ask me all the time "Heathcliff, how do you do so well with women?", "Heathcliff, why are your posts so interesting and entertaining to read?", "Heathcliff, why is your penis so large?".
I'll tell you why. As a child born from a stoic, math-genius engineer father and his BPD trophy Wife, I have both superpowers, hyper-systemisation and hyper-empathy. BPD is 60% inheritable, and while it may not manifest as often in males (its basically a female disease), I'm almost certain I got a lot of the characteristics.
I can autistically systemise, too much sometimes, but enough that I can pick out shit-tests and push through LMR and see the structures of the SMP. Enough so that I can pull out condensed and potent theory and analysis from my extreme-male mind and present it for all you to learn from.
But I also over-empathise too. I second hand cringe when I see people embarrass themselves... and then 2 weeks later I remember the event and cringe again... FOR THEM.
I understand women on a personal and emotional level, and so have no problem gaming them. Sure I fail a lot too, but that's the price of success.
And I understand you betas well enough that I can write appealing, entertaining and emotional posts that will keep you reading right till the end, I know what you want.
Practice your empathising power. I'm sure you're all very good at creating systems and using them to help achieve success, but if you can master BOTH skills, you will be, quite literally, unstoppable.