Guy bails on marital therapy, gets ripped, starts spending weeknights in New York City for new job, nails young Brazilian and surprise surprise...his marriage gets much much better (self.TheRedPill)
submitted 1 year ago * by Endorsed Contributorredpillcad
On Saturday I attended a pre Independence Day BBQ someplace in the suburbs on the Acela line. A friend of a friend was there and looked to me to be doing really really well.
Stylish haircut, fashionable T shirt and shorts that acceuntated his greatly improved physique, and he was going on about a super new job he started 8 months ago.
The whole time, his wife was rubbing his shoulders, sweetly checking in on their kids to make sure they were happy, and getting him and me fresh drinks.
For years I knew they had problems. Arguments, Nagging, and Therapy sums it up. He didn't make enough money to suit her needs and had gotten soft after a so so college hockey background. He used to tell everybody who would listen that he was trying hard to save his family and was depressed etc etc blah blah. He really was afraid to lose her and was absolutely clueless why she was not happy
Later I learned that his wife had found some charges on his Amex from Victoria's Secret and while living alone 3 hours away during the week, he had been hitting gym very hard and taking some admin assistant out to try on clothes and fuck in the dressing rooms at various department stores. Alot.
So....how did she handle it? She told all her friends it was terribly hard to cut him loose now that he looked so good and he was working so hard for the family. Mind you, wifey had a lawyer BEFORE and was seeking a separation agreement but now thatwas off the table and her smile gave away a deeply happy woman who now had what she wanted:
A man that other women want
[–]Nomfwic 940 points941 points942 points 1 year ago (64 children)
To fix a marriage, you should work on yourself, not on your marriage.
[–]TheRedPillMonkey 273 points274 points275 points 1 year ago (26 children)
This 100 times over. Decent advice for women too.
[–]hulk_hogans_alt 366 points367 points368 points 1 year ago (24 children)
Try telling that to a woman lmao.
“IF YOU CANT ACCEPT ME AT MY WORST YOU DONT DESERVE ME AT MY BEST” - her response probably
[–]Boddicker06 246 points247 points248 points 1 year ago (2 children)
If you accept yourself at your worst you’re garbage.
[–]TheReformist94 31 points32 points33 points 1 year ago (0 children)
That's the best response I've heard so far.flip it on them,entitled cunts
[–][deleted] 45 points46 points47 points 1 year ago (0 children)
Her worst: while she's destroying your cellphone WHO THE FUCK IS SARAH???? (Doesn't remember it's your sister)
Her best: I tried to cook spaghetti but I burnt it so now you get to take me out tee-hee
[–][deleted] 32 points33 points34 points 1 year ago (0 children)
The only way to respond to this is "If you can't accept me at my bulkiest, you don't deserve me at my shreddiest"
[–][deleted] 31 points32 points33 points 1 year ago (5 children)
My crazy ex used to say this... Ugh...
[–]Morphs_ 73 points74 points75 points 1 year ago (3 children)
Girls who say that crap usually are only mediocre at their 'best' so a terrible deal usually.
[–]nester79 26 points27 points28 points 1 year ago (2 children)
They're usually fat as f--- too.
[–]sadshark 28 points29 points30 points 1 year ago (0 children)
"Then I guess I don't deserve you. Good luck finding someone who does :) "
[–][deleted] 11 points12 points13 points 1 year ago (0 children)
I almost wanted to slap you with a 6 meter run-up for saying that, even though you were mocking a woman with it.
[–]showerdudes9 1 points1 points1 points 1 year ago [recovered]
Ok its time for a cringe boys. I used this in my blue pill beta days. On facebook. Like those girl status updates they do when they had a fight with their bf, i did it after some bluepill fight with gf. Lol. Kill me
[–]Je_suis_throwy 26 points27 points28 points 1 year ago (0 children)
Killing your old self should suffice.
[–]conflagratorX 24 points25 points26 points 1 year ago (0 children)
What best? After 24 every single day she is getting worse.
[–]Rian_Stone 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (1 child)
Who gives two sweet fucks over what she hears?
[–]hulk_hogans_alt 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (0 children)
I agree. But there’s a certain point where you gotta tell a bitch goodbye and stop telling them to improve. Some chicks, especially in 2018, have no emotional maturity.
[–]1KyfhoMyoba 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (0 children)
That's why you don't tell her with words:
Women talk, men do. Demonstrate, don't explicate. Acta, non verba.
[–]RPinthemaking 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (0 children)
I had to hold in a laugh when my ex said this to me.
[–]positiveredpill 0 points1 point2 points 11 months ago (0 children)
I hate when women say this shit. Imagine if a guy said it
[–][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago (0 children)
Decent advice for women too.
Decent advice for women too.
Fuck that. TRP is about sexual strategy for MEN.
[–]TheDevilsAdvokaat 25 points26 points27 points 1 year ago* (0 children)
And the bonus is, if the marriage still fails anyway, you're in good shape for a new relationship.
[–]PR0JECT_XIII 5 points6 points7 points 1 year ago (0 children)
You are not wrong.
A friend of mine is going through a separation. He is trying to pull her into therapy, which her argument is " if it can't be fixed between us, it can't be fixed at all".
Her issue is quite simple: * She wants him to man up and start taking on the role as a man.
I am not sure if she has told that to his face yet, and tbh I would not be surprised if she hadn't. She want him to figure it out.
Word of advice from the sidelines: don't think that you can bring up all the shit you do for her as a reason to solidify your relationship. She does not care.
[–]untetheredbachelor 24 points25 points26 points 1 year ago (17 children)
I hope TRP is still not advocating marriage in today's climate.
[–]AudioAssassyn 30 points31 points32 points 1 year ago* (11 children)
That's the vibe I was getting. The real solution to not having a marriage on the rocks is to never. Get. Married. This guy's marriage was and probably still is on the rocks. He's down to cheat, and women are always down to cheat. So even if he stays in excellent shape and keeps his career strong, now she has all the ammo she'll ever need in the future when she decides to bounce on that one guys cock at the office.
As far as loyalty, women don't care how fit you are. Before she probably would have gone behind OP's back, but now that he got busted having an affair, she'll gladly get revenge when the time is right. She'll probably wait until she knows he doesn't have any prospects, and fuck a Chad and rub his nose in it. My ex wife was a chronic cheater even when I was fucking jacked. AWALT. It's only a matter of time, and it's best to not be legally bound to her when she decides to do it. If you just date (if you even feel the need to that) at least it's just a breakup when it happens instead of a full blown divorce that will likely include a fair amount of cucking and divorce rape. The guy in OP's story won this round, and the marriage back to hanging by a thread because an element of jealousy was introduced. She'll get him to ditch the floozy. And I guarantee after this, she's still pissed deep down, and is currently looking for her next prospect. It'll be someone as good or better looking and equally or more successful than him. This is the exact thing that happened with me and my ex wife. I revenge cheated on her with a smoke show, so she fought tooth and nail to win me back over, and it seemed our marriage was going better than ever, and when I was in a time where I had no prospects, she bailed. This thing isn't over. I guarantee it.
Just say no to the ring.
[–]RedPilledGodEmperor 14 points15 points16 points 1 year ago (7 children)
My ex wife was a chronic cheater even when I was fucking jacked. AWALT.
My ex wife was a chronic cheater even when I was fucking jacked. AWALT.
It's not always a matter of how good you are or how good the other guy is, all that matters is that the guy is "different"
Same with guys too. Look at Tiger Woods. Was married to a freaking hot Swedish woman and he cheated on her with tons of chicks.
[–]Ivan_The_Reddish 8 points9 points10 points 1 year ago (1 child)
I mean, Nordegren is decent looking but she isn't a quarter of a billion dollars hot.
[–]AudioAssassyn 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (0 children)
Currently my favorite comedian. I love how he just fucking cuts ALL the fucking bullshit whether you like it or not, and just tell it how it is. I've seen that clip you posted like 10 times, and I'm about to watch it for an 11th because it's so funny and so true. The red pill is a jagged one, but I'd rather be unplugged from the matrix, even if that means not everything's unicorns and lollipops.
[–]AudioAssassyn 12 points13 points14 points 1 year ago* (4 children)
Exactly. Looking good and being successful has zero effect on loyalty. Bottomline is it will eventually happen. And she'll do it with absolutely ZERO regard for how it makes you feel. You can blow your head off for all she cares. In fact, that would be a badge of honor for her - she's so good a guy killed himself when he lost her.
Marriage is just an obsolete legal agreement. Back when it almost always actually meant "until death do us part", it made sense. You had permanent emotional and financial support, a partner you knew would always be there, maybe have some kids and feel good about raising a good kid, having help around the house with chores, and then having help with living (hopefully) in old age. Now it's just a huge "look at me look at me!" party for a girl, and when she gets bored eventually, she cans it. No work on it. Just "meh, fuck this, I'm liking fucking that new guy better, so bye!" There is no such thing as forever anymore, there's no such thing as agency. All marriage means is that it's going to be so much more emotionally and financially draining when she decides to "break up", and now gives her all kinds of other options like alimony or child support that she wouldn't have had if you weren't an idiot who thought it was anything more than just your turn to fuck her. Ring just meant you may have gotten to fuck her a little longer than if there was no ring.
[–]RedPilledGodEmperor 10 points11 points12 points 1 year ago (3 children)
Exactly. I am turning 27 soon and my parents have a great marriage. Been married for about 30 years or so. These days, it's way harder to have a marriage that will last 5 or 10 years.
There is no way that I am ever getting married. I will go to weddings, celebrate other people's marriage and be happy for them because they are doing something that they believe will make them happy, but I'm not doing it. Forget the cost of divorce if it somehow never happens. Just the engagement ring and wedding alone cost way too much money.
Plus, for the most part sex tends to go away during a marriage. Even if you do everything to stay in great shape and look good. No matter how much pressure I get from friends, family or even coworkers, I'm not getting married.
[–]AudioAssassyn 8 points9 points10 points 1 year ago (2 children)
Smart man. I'm currently not even interested in any LTR, but I'm never doing marriage again. Spent $5k on a ring that I got about $300 for when I traded it in after. Put my heart and soul into something I truly believed would last forever. Passed up all kinds of opportunities for the sake of the marriage. Only to learn nothing meant shit. Fuck that noise.
[–]RedPilledGodEmperor 3 points4 points5 points 1 year ago (1 child)
Damn $5K on a ring?
I would rather lose three times that amount trying to start my own business. At least with the business, it had a chance at succeeding and I can call myself a "former entrepreneur."
In the event it did somehow succeed, you could become rich.
[–]AudioAssassyn 5 points6 points7 points 1 year ago (0 children)
Exactly. Even the jewelry associated with marriage is a bullshit lie. Obviously it's not actually worth anything.
[–]hamsterenema 6 points7 points8 points 1 year ago (0 children)
This is exactly right. When he increased his SMV wifey got the tingles again... For now... It ain't gonna last. Never fully committing to them is the only way to play it safe.
Marriage. Not. Even. Once.
[–]jewishsupremacist88 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (0 children)
damn. yeah dude this is why i feel like most of us have no choice. if high value men can no longer keep these thots in line..whats the average joe schmo to do?
[–]Senior Endorsed Contributormax_peenor 3 points4 points5 points 1 year ago (2 children)
There are a lot of people that come here after other measures fail to explain why their marriage is so screwed up, or I'm my case, just fucking weird.
[–]untetheredbachelor 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (1 child)
If they really did swallow the red pill they'd likely know: She's fucking a chad, he's a simp, etc. I don't know why people get married this day and age.
[–]Senior Endorsed Contributormax_peenor 5 points6 points7 points 1 year ago (0 children)
There are a few people older than 25 on this planet.
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (0 children)
Today's climate you shouldn't marry or ltr
[–]SlyVikram 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (0 children)
This line made my year bro.! Kudos!
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (0 children)
Literally the only decent advice I’ve ever seen on this god forsaken sub
[–]gbdoragnic 1 points1 points1 points 1 year ago [recovered]
This is empty words, the same thing a therapist says , working on yourself has a bad said, I mean if it didn't blue pill guys would be top, I would say to fix a marriage love yourself, that is the secret
[–]throw_it_away100100 20 points21 points22 points 1 year ago (12 children)
Blue pill guys don't work on themselves. That's the point.
[+]gbdoragnic comment score below threshold-9 points-8 points-7 points 1 year ago (11 children)
Than how does beta get the bucks? Ask yourself, how why do girls say, "Your the type of guy I will marry if you're 30"
[–]throw_it_away100100 15 points16 points17 points 1 year ago (10 children)
That's not what working on yourself means here. Betas only have bux. Because they spent most of their 20s-30s focusing on their STEM careers instead of gaining SMV. High SMV men don't have to be rich to get and keep women, it's better of course but not necessary.
[–]gbdoragnic 8 points9 points10 points 1 year ago (9 children)
Putting yourself though a STEM career is working on yourself, I said empty words because just saying working on yourself isn't going to help you with women, but loving yourself will. If you love yourself you will not be disrespected, you will not put her above you, you will also take care of your body, and your mind.
[–]Endorsed Contributorredpillcad[S] 9 points10 points11 points 1 year ago (4 children)
working on self here means cultivating ones masculinity
[–]nester79 7 points8 points9 points 1 year ago (3 children)
Having a stem career doesn't negate increasing masculinity. It only adds to it.
[–]Endorsed Contributorredpillcad[S] 7 points8 points9 points 1 year ago (2 children)
Not really. Working on your career can be part of building SMV and your masculinity but not by itself.
Way too many guys do very well at work and live happy wife, happy life. They may have succeeded in school and work but it was in service of their feminine overlords.
Do you follow me?
Today, I'll run circles around my colleagues and even manager. I'm closing a deal this month that should be noticed in the firm globally. All that is for me. The benefits serve my mission and goals.
Give that a think.
[–]nester79 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (0 children)
Right. That's exactly what I said. I never said a stem career only would raise smv. It can only help.
Masculine guy gets a stem career and makes more money which is used as a vehicle to make himself better (money for cool hobbies, money for travel, money for straight up legit clothes) - it raises smv.
Blue pill loser gets a stem career and makes good money used as a vehicle same as above - it raises smv (maybe not at the trajectory that being more red pill would)
So regardless of where you are in the red pill blue pill journey, a stem career that brings in money can merely add to your smv.
[–]Nomfwic 3 points4 points5 points 1 year ago (0 children)
Exactly. They work for someone else, not for themselves.
[–]tranquil_af 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (3 children)
What's a STEM career?
[–]geturcraptogether 4 points5 points6 points 1 year ago (2 children)
Science, Technology, Engineering, Medical. Anything where you have to have an actual semi useful degree, then have to get certs (industry or government) in order to work in those fields.
They pay well if you're fresh out of college and are somewhat bankable.
I work in IT (22 yrs), no degree, couple of certs, lotta experience.
[–]tranquil_af 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (1 child)
TIL I'm pursuing a STEM(Engineering) degree.
[–]sourmonkeytroll 249 points250 points251 points 1 year ago (22 children)
Women usually leave when you are down and out. They almost never leave when you are on top of your game.
[–]--Edog-- 108 points109 points110 points 1 year ago* (19 children)
Happened to me. 2 days before I was about to have knee surgery. 6 weeks after I developed a mysterious, debilitating chronic pain problem,(after years of mistakenly tolerating her bitching and complaining about everything I did.) she says she wants out. I am moving out in August, and there is no way in HELL I would ever get married or live with a woman again. Women are like sharks, if there's blood in the water, or if you show weakness.... they will eat you alive and spit you out. They are wired by evolution to be repelled by male weakness of any kind - emotional or physical. I would never have believed it if I hadn't lived through it. Women are a lot closer to being part of the "natural world" of animal survival than men are. She may seem like a nice, sweet girl - but don't be fooled by appearances. She is an animal with animal survival instincts.
[–]sourmonkeytroll 72 points73 points74 points 1 year ago (9 children)
Women go feral when the resources look like they might run out.
[–]450k_crackparty 112 points113 points114 points 1 year ago (3 children)
I live the the far north. A wise man once told me: when you want to get rid of a woman, stop chopping firewood.
[–][deleted] 14 points15 points16 points 1 year ago (0 children)
or just be completely average
[–]BrownGummyBear 3 points4 points5 points 1 year ago (1 child)
I don’t get the saying, mind elaborating?
[–]450k_crackparty 8 points9 points10 points 1 year ago (0 children)
Like firewood to heat the house. Many people use woodstoves here.
[–]--Edog-- 44 points45 points46 points 1 year ago (1 child)
It's a Red Pill thing all around: my wife was bitchy/unpeasant even when I was coming home with: performance bonuses, profit sharing, untaxed CASH enployee retention bonuses and hefty 401k bonuses. We also owned multiple rental properties that I managed. Okay, there were areas I was probably dropping the ball 'cuz I was working and commuting a lot... but I was earning and supporting the fam like a man. But that was the clue I missed: The fact she was acting like a bitch was her message that she wan't happy. And also a shit test. The fact I was willing to put up with her shitty behavior made her despise me for being weak. If I had just put my foot down and told her to shape up or I was shipping out...
[–]sourmonkeytroll 31 points32 points33 points 1 year ago (0 children)
Had similar story. Working 80hr weeks was killing it for the beta bux. But got fat and failed to lead.
Maintaining frame and passing shit tests helped the respect in the relationship. Losing weight and raising smv increased sex.
Hypergamy is ferocious. When your married there is no rest from it. But it was there when I was beta, at least now I have tools to make the relationships in my life more of what I want.
[–]geturcraptogether 6 points7 points8 points 1 year ago (0 children)
Proved to me by my ex. That and when the beta shows (as proven by the ex wife )
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (1 child)
This is true but one exception is women who make good money on their own. My buddy hurt his back a few years ago and is in nonstop pain, which means he can't work and such. His wife is a lawyer and brings home plenty of money, they're going strong to this day. In the end my guess is that things will degrade between them but that remains to be seen.
[–]TheDevilsAdvokaat 22 points23 points24 points 1 year ago (5 children)
Yes. This is why you can never reveal your weaknesses to a woman - even though they say they like it, and may think they do, in fact they don't and it changes you forever in their eyes.
[–]--Edog-- 14 points15 points16 points 1 year ago* (4 children)
Yes!!! Don't tell women anything that makes you look weak. A woman does NOT want to hear about anything from you - unless it benefits her: "Here are my plans for the future...I want to add a deck to the house...I am going to apply for a better position at work...I am planning a ski vacation for the family" That's what they she wants to hear - and nothing else. Got problems? Get a therapist. Don't tell her jack shit about your struggles or pains in life. She wants you to listen to her complain, she does not want to listen to,your problems...she canot actually handle any weakness or instabilty from her man.
[–]TheDevilsAdvokaat 4 points5 points6 points 1 year ago (3 children)
Yep. The weird thing is, they seem to think they DO like to hear it - you'll read all this bullshit about how they like men opening up to them and showing their vulnerable side - but bullshit is all it is. Women don't understand themselves. They have idealistic notions of what they want in a man that don't match up to what they really want.
[–]--Edog-- 7 points8 points9 points 1 year ago (2 children)
Everything women say about men is really about themselves. ...when she says she wants you to "open up" and and "share your emotions" ...she means she wants you to talk about how you really feel about her. She does NOT want to be your therapist and cannot handle your emotional issues.... she can barely control her own emotions. I am not even sure they believe that men even have feelz about things.
[–]TheDevilsAdvokaat 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (1 child)
I agree. Women still want to be the woman in the relationship. If you start acting like one it's a significant turn off for them.
[–]--Edog-- 3 points4 points5 points 1 year ago (0 children)
It's a cue for them to look for a real man.
[–]LeavingHumanityBehin 1 points1 points1 points 1 year ago [recovered]
Only if you give a fuck. If you would be having a knee surgery and didn't even complain about it or talk about it or seek compassion, she'd probably think you were higher value
[–]--Edog-- 1 points1 points1 points 1 year ago [recovered]
If you would "learn to be" writing in proper English maybe I would understand what you are "trying to be" saying.
[–]WestyWorld 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (0 children)
It’s so glaringly true. It’s not a some women do, some women don’t kind of thing. Women WILL try to jump ship if anything substantially bad happens in your life ; basically if you lose your job, get injured, or get sick. I have seen it dozens of times in my own life, the lives of my friends, in posts on here and it’s actually also frequently depicted in movies.
That whole line “I promise to keep you till death do us part” Fucking LOL. The vast majority of women are not capable of that.
[–]Pragmaticpandas 171 points172 points173 points 1 year ago (7 children)
Increase SMV, increase attraction. Simple as that.
[–]zarndyhoff 1 points1 points1 points 1 year ago [recovered]
Sorry, recent subscriber here - what's SMV? Thanks :)
[–]alleyteris 22 points23 points24 points 1 year ago (0 children)
Read the side bar dude ,it is a must read for a reason
[–]JLucasNewShitTooLit 36 points37 points38 points 1 year ago (4 children)
Size / Mods of vape. The bigger your vape clouds the more wet her pussy gets.
[–]mitzibishi 1 points1 points1 points 1 year ago [recovered]
The bigger the male feminist sign you raise in the air the more vagine you will receive
[–]Endorsed Contributorredpillcad[S] 9 points10 points11 points 1 year ago (1 child)
This. Wear a MAGA pussyhat everywhere. Pair it with a wifebeater and camo cutoffs
[–]JLucasNewShitTooLit 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (0 children)
Don't forget the camo or bright orange inmate colored crocs (bonus points for one of each) American flag colorway will also get the job done. That's the real puss gusher well that and pink/lime green roller blades. Don't believe roll your ass through the mall and I bet you, you start hydroplaning around any woman.
Edit: Unless you are ready for 24/7 pussy then you need to get yourself a pair of heelys and some Naruto shirts.
[–]WoodWizzy87 276 points277 points278 points 1 year ago (17 children)
If your girl can’t stop rubbing her hands all over you 24/7 while at home or out and about. She ain’t going nowhere. Aim for that level of affection from your girl
[–]TaylorWolf 124 points125 points126 points 1 year ago (0 children)
This is like old-school core TRP.
This is what TRP is all about.
[–][deleted] 72 points73 points74 points 1 year ago (7 children)
If your girl isn't doing this, she isn't your girl. If you dont feel comfortable with a girl doing this to you, fix your self esteem. Read the six pillars of self esteem and get your esteem in check.
[–]j_arbuckle2012 6 points7 points8 points 1 year ago (1 child)
I am glad someone else here swears by that book. Really helped me out of a slog several years ago.
[–]OfficerWade 7 points8 points9 points 1 year ago (4 children)
How do you define self esteem?
[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 1 year ago (0 children)
The esteem to which you hold yourself. It’s a very literal phrase
[–]Flawless44 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (0 children)
The view you have of yourself, justified or not.
[–]LiteraIIyJesus 1 points1 points1 points 1 year ago [recovered]
Any advice on getting her to be like this?
[–]SuperCrazy07 39 points40 points41 points 1 year ago (2 children)
Easiest question on the internet. Bigger muscles. 95% girls can't resist and the remainder are low sex drive and/or lesbians. (I don't mean that sarcastically, to each their own, but let's focus on the middle 95% of the normal curve.)
[–]Endorsed Contributorredpillcad[S] 42 points43 points44 points 1 year ago (1 child)
Muscles, low body fat, sharp haircut and clothes are all within a man's control. Attitude very important too.
That's a man's SMV in a nutshell
[–]onizloms 23 points24 points25 points 1 year ago (0 children)
Attitude is huge. I'm actually ripped so it's not the best example, but my girlfriend is the most tactile and attracted when I'm rocking a social setting. Went to her dad's 50th birthday party this weekend, and met a lot of new family members. I was obviously the center of attention as I'm a foreigner, and I spent most of the time entertaining groups with stories and shit. She was rubbing me 24/7, touching my dick and making out behind walls etc.
[–]WoodWizzy87 -4 points-3 points-2 points 1 year ago (1 child)
My girl put my non stick cooking pan in the dishwasher for the third time.... I scolded the fuck out of her and she apologized. That wasn’t enough though, I grabbed her arm and dragged her downstairs where the dogs sleep. I said, “you’re in the dog house now woman, now get in there and think about what you’ve done”. I put a grown woman on s fucking timeout because I could and I had the frame.
We had hot monkey sex that night
[–]Senior Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil 116 points117 points118 points 1 year ago (12 children)
How many marriage therapists acknowledge Feminism as a cause of the decline of family cohesion? Basically zero. Their job is to blame the individual for a societal problem to distract from the societal problem.
Therapists exist yo preserve the status quo by labeling all dissent as "abnormal".
[–]--Edog-- 82 points83 points84 points 1 year ago (7 children)
My marriage therapist told us: "most of the couples who come to marriage therapy only do it to say they tried marriage therapy. Then they get divorced" - he was right.
[–]Senior Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil 40 points41 points42 points 1 year ago (5 children)
Allright well in that case we should compare your marriage therapist experience to that of the modern church
The goal of modern 2018 church isn't to believe in God because let's be 100% honest here most people at church fucking don't. The goal is to watch someone believe in God on our behalf.
So rather than fight to maintain marriage the goal is to outsource someone else to do it.
That way we can focus on what we really care about our jobs, mistresses and drug addictions.
[–]destraht 3 points4 points5 points 1 year ago* (4 children)
Isn't just about everything a quick indulgence check box for the masses including; voting, donating to starving African children, diet soda, PC virtue signaling at the cocktail party, giving the San Francisco bum a dollar, giving a plastic light switch smile, buying a carbon offset of a "tree" that was planted in a third world country.
I've noticed that losing interest in these pretenses forces hands and has me either getting laid real fast or labeled as mean, grumpy, sociopathic and online as autistic (but never once in real life). Meanwhile actual sociopaths love this shit because they are always faking everything and template pretense culture gives them superior cover over a requirement to be genuine. The rise of the real and actual sociopath coincides with the vapid checkbox culture.
I'll add that my favorite thing about Ukraine is the freedom to be miserable. We lost that right in California a long time ago and so we get plastic smiles or risk going to jail.
[–]Senior Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (3 children)
This is called commodity fetishism and what your experiencing is alienation. Since your in Ukraine you should know this line if reason very well.
[–]destraht 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (2 children)
Yes of course. That one sentence summarized it perfectly but I wrote it for the guys just starting to scratch their heads.
Backstory for a Russian who might get a kick out of it: I was in Ukraine but I can't return until September due to Kiev creating a new 180 days in the year law that nobody informed me about even after having "overextended" and passing blissfully through land borders into Poland and Moldova for quite a long while every 90 days. Then Kiev locked my profile so that only they can undo it whereas other borders don't do that. Just another point in the argument that Ukraine is not a unified country and that people don't really like Kiev's shit all that much. I think that Kiev just made a law that no other border is willing to enforce and so it only exists out of the Kiev airports. I'll always fly through Warsaw from here on out forever.
I'm in Colombia now.
[–]PhranticPenguin 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (1 child)
Offtopic: How are the relations between Russians and Ukrainians right now?
I'm a total outsider, I'm just wondering what both em think of eachother, considering the civil war conflict going on.
[–]destraht 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (0 children)
I'm not sure but my American friend says that Russian language propaganda can be pretty bad. In Ukraine it seems that the extremists tend to be in L'viv and in the central Southern places North of the Black Sea. I'm not exactly sure of the Russian perspective but I gather that many of them view Ukrainians as either extremists or sad victims of their own childishness and foreign meddling.
[–]1ozaku7 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (0 children)
That's the generation that wants to have it all without any of the effort.
[–]Senior Contributordr_warlock 16 points17 points18 points 1 year ago (0 children)
The wife goes to marriage counseling as a gesture to entertain she’s a good person and see her husband grovel. All marriage counseling is unacceptable. Marriage counseling = negotiating desire.
[–]destraht 4 points5 points6 points 1 year ago (0 children)
ex-USSRists know well the real role and dangers of head doctors.
Therapists in general are shit. Mine was just asking me what I thought and felt in that moment, and it cost me like 50 bucks an hour. Then I realized I could just get a body2body massage from some hot college chick and it turned out to be much better.
Therapists are just good at bullshitting around and letting the people solve their own problem. But it's politically incorrent to tell a fat hog whose husband lost interest in her to lose some weight and get big fake tits, much like they cannot tell a man to man up, hit the gym and stop being such a pussy about everything. You live only once and you don't want to commit your life to some second hand garbage.
[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 1 year ago (0 children)
Their job is to keep you down
[–]GodOfDinosaurs 173 points174 points175 points 1 year ago (20 children)
Okay this will work like 5% of the time. Cheating on your wife and having her find out about it is not really a good way to save your marriage.
[–]Endorsed ContributorThotwrecker 118 points119 points120 points 1 year ago (10 children)
The problem with TRP and married TRP is that they go on about dread game this, dread game that. "Go nuclear" etc. When your marriage is in the toilet because you're a depressed has-been beta and she's bored and wants more, and treats you with disrespect, is meeting with a lawyer behind your back, etc... then what "dread game" can the beta really pull? None, because he has exposed himself as lower SMV and undesirable by other women.
There is no dread game for that situation, there is only actual dread. When you have exposed yourself as a beta and her attraction is dead, you have to literally force her to recognize that your SMV is higher than hers, and you're better than her, and she gains more by association. It's obviously a roll of the dice, but at that point, you either act or you wait for the axe to fall.
IDK about OPs story, for all we know it's BS, but the general concept is true - when you start experiences marriage troubles, you run your gay ass light dread game. When your marriage is in the toilet and she's headed for divorce regardless, then this is your best move.
The "save your marriage" part of your wording is the wrong frame. You can't try to save your marriage. You have to do best by yourself and be as successful as you can, and demonstrate as much value as you can - if you are trying to save your marriage, you're already catering to her and you're already losing, because she feels how dependent you are and how your goal is just to keep her.
[–]Morphs_ 12 points13 points14 points 1 year ago (5 children)
Well the story completely omits the guy's frame in the whole ordeal. You can be a cheating BB that feels guilty afterwards, and there will probably be a divorce coming your way. Or you have a solid frame to accompany the new SMV so the wife sticks. I think the frame part played a crucial role here.
[–]Endorsed Contributorredpillcad[S] 10 points11 points12 points 1 year ago (0 children)
The story is true. Slight inconsequential details changed and as you say the core of it is that once a woman pegs you as beta than slight dread won't register. She needs to be viscerally awakened to your new SMV with strong actions not hints
Another point of the story is that when you are a womans best option then you will get away with far more than the blue pill chubbyhubby who got a handjob at the Asian massage parlor
[–]_BITCHES_LOVE_ME_ 4 points5 points6 points 1 year ago (2 children)
It probably did, but how do you stick to your guns after being caught cheating? I know a lot of the guys here advocate it, but how do you spin it to wifey when she confronts you, what can one say?
[–]Jampak_5000 6 points7 points8 points 1 year ago (1 child)
you don't need to say anything. say less in general. the fact that shes caught you fucking other women is a big enough statement. definitely don't say sorry though
[–]1ozaku7 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (0 children)
I mean, if you cheat, atleast own up to it. "Yeah, I fucked her and I'm not sorry."
[–]antariusz 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (0 children)
Sounds like a natural alpha fixing problems organically in the story, seems plausible.
[–]1cappadocianhawk 3 points4 points5 points 1 year ago (0 children)
You can save yourself and then she will have to make her own mind if she wants to save herself. And you can't do that if you didn't come to accept that there is a good chance the marriage is over. That is true idgaf and outcome independence.
Can't control other people anyhow, maybe your turn is over.
[–]TheTrenTrannyTrain 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (1 child)
12 levels of dread should be on the sidebar.
It is for MRP. If you are not married you don’t need 12 levels of dread. It’s for us marrried guys because you don’t next and ghost your wife because she didn’t text you back.
[–]Flintblood 19 points20 points21 points 1 year ago* (3 children)
I think improving SMV and getting close to cheating would be enough in most troubled marriages. Depends on how far checked out wifey is. If she’s already seeing other people, then it’s over and this move is more likely to either make you feel better and maybe induce some dread.
[–]some-pseudonym 1 points1 points1 points 1 year ago [recovered]
Nice thread to read but i have no clue what does SMV stands for? Sorry, I'm relatively new to this sub. Thanks. :)
[–][deleted] 7 points8 points9 points 1 year ago (0 children)
Sexual Market Value - acronym that generally describes how attractive and valuable you are in the dating market.
[–]juliusstreicher 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (0 children)
Short for Read The Sidebar. At Least The Glossary.
[–]pbpunk 4 points5 points6 points 1 year ago (0 children)
At that point you don't care anyway. I was in the similar situation and it had the same results.
[–]NBKFactor 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (0 children)
This isnt about cheating that the byproduct. This is about self improvement. You work on yourself and things fall into place.
[–]nofilmynofucky 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (2 children)
Yiu couldn't be more wrong about the point of this post. I'd suggest reading it again
[–]GodOfDinosaurs 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (1 child)
I understand the point of the post. Self-improvement to become more desirable via dreadgame and reintroducing pre-selection etc etc. Normal RP stuff. I'm saying most women will just flat out divorce you and take your money if they find out you've cheated. Cheating has a very low chance of working out well for you if you're actually interested in your marriage.
[–]scabbalicious 30 points31 points32 points 1 year ago (0 children)
Sounds a lot more like a woman who is waiting for the right moment (biggest payday) to pull the trigger on a divorce.
[–][deleted] 26 points27 points28 points 1 year ago (1 child)
the man in the story, is he interested in having a magnanimous relationship with his wife?
Thats some level 11 dread game tactics to actually be unfaithful.
[–]AlexanderTheBread 13 points14 points15 points 1 year ago (0 children)
I suspect he cheated just because...and that the positive results were probably a surprise to him
[–][deleted] 8 points9 points10 points 1 year ago (0 children)
I’m not surprised, AWALT. Though I’m still very conservative regarding relationships and pro monogamy so I would probably divorce my wife instead of fucking another women, but that’s just me.
[–]ebaymasochist 11 points12 points13 points 1 year ago (3 children)
He made her feel young again, like it was the beginning of the relationship.
[–]henrysmyagent 64 points65 points66 points 1 year ago (2 children)
He made her feel replaceable...just like she was at the beginning the relationship.
[–]TheDevilsAdvokaat 7 points8 points9 points 1 year ago (0 children)
And raised his value in her eyes. Nothing makes a man more attractive to a woman than knowing some other woman wants him.
[–]Flintblood 16 points17 points18 points 1 year ago (11 children)
This approach maybe not taken all the way, should be the new method for marriage therapy.
[–]--Edog-- 21 points22 points23 points 1 year ago (10 children)
I agree. #1. Guy hits the gym #2. Guy gets better job #3. Guy starts hitting on women in front of his wife. A woman won't do jack shit to save her marriage if she's "over it"
[–]Endorsed Contributorredpillcad[S] 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (9 children)
A woman properly motivated and led will work to save a relationship.
She will get or remain thin. She will resume blowjobs and provide a slick wet pussy on demand
They are so fickle, crazy, hormonal and led by their childish emotions and their jealous friends...the smartest thing a man can do is to never marry or live with a woman. They are constantly looking for something to be disastified with. No matter how strong, how Alpha, how studly you are. A woman is unstable, unpredictable, and too easily influenced by her gal pals at work.....who she bitches to about you all week long. What do they tell her? "You are sooo awesome, and sweet, and giving and wonderful...he's a selfish man-jerk-asshole-and yoou DESERVE a much better guy (even though you're a 48 year old woman and no guy is gonna want you) you should divorce him!"
[–]WizardSenpai 1 points1 points1 points 1 year ago [recovered]
my relationship is dying but i just had hernia repair surgery, wont recover fully for months. Guess i'll have to upgrade ¯_(ツ)_/¯
If a woman doesn't give you sex she should be dumped on spot.
That's 80% of wives one year after marriage. They joke about it at work - "ahhh I tell him I have cramps, or a headache, or my period is really long this month - he's too dumb to know"
So she should be divorced on spot.
And she takes the house. half your money, your kids, plus alomony. Plus child support.
Nice victim complex.
What is prenup.
What is offshore trust.
What is earning less on paper than her so she ends up paying for child support and you go away with stuff?
Are you born yesterday?
[–]Million-Suns 4 points5 points6 points 1 year ago (1 child)
Why the heck do red pillers even marry?
I hope I will never fall into that trap.
[–]DayGameChirality 3 points4 points5 points 1 year ago (0 children)
It's not a trap and you shouldn't "hope" you don't fall into it, you just don't do it based on rational thought.
[–]Muk1st 5 points6 points7 points 1 year ago (1 child)
Holding all the chips in a marriage is key, if a woman believes that she is worse off if she leaves rather than staying, she will shape her ass up pretty quickly.
You can kind of respond to bad behavior this way by telling her to pack her shit and move on out every once in a while when she gets a little out of hand for whatever reason.
[–]francisco_DANKonia 3 points4 points5 points 1 year ago (1 child)
If only guys without a relationship to save could muster the willpower to apply dread game on the sexual marketplace.
People are motivated by possible loss more than gain
[–]theflappiestflapper 6 points7 points8 points 1 year ago (0 children)
Those last two lines are almost poetic
[–]WolfofAnarchy 10 points11 points12 points 1 year ago (4 children)
You think they're happy? I think not. I think they're in a marriage based only on looks and attraction, and not on human connection and love. You might say blah blah it doesn't exist I'm a nihilist maaaan but I don't believe that.
[–][deleted] -4 points-3 points-2 points 1 year ago (0 children)
hahahaha thank you, i needed this joke today
[–]StrawoftheMonkey -3 points-2 points-1 points 1 year ago (2 children)
I'm surprised your post wasn't downvoted. The general consensus I've gathered here is that only looks mattered in a relationship between a man and a woman.
[–]WolfofAnarchy 5 points6 points7 points 1 year ago (1 child)
Yes, I was too. But people know it's true. The Red Pill is a toolset, one which most often leads to picking up women that are hot and used for sex. They're not relationship material. Some are, but most aren't. The women you will be picking up with the TRP toolset are most often a perfect fit with the archetypal Modern Woman = Selfies on Instagram every day, Starbucks, latest smartphone, goes to Ibiza on vacations, has had 10-20 different dicks in her before you, etc.
This is why I left TRP, sure, it worked, but I found that my magnet attracted those who could gratify me, but not fulfill me, and eventually I stopped desiring casual sex and am now working on myself 24/7 and I've got a few nice girls in my sights who are more innocent than my previous endeavors.
I find that I reject modern hookup culture and the soulless women it produces. How hypocritical of me it would be to be against hookups until I can get some pussy and then just be a part of it and fuel the machine and enable it.
[–]Flintblood 1 point2 points3 points 1 year ago (0 children)
There are some important takeaways that will always benefit you regardless of where you go, including things like preselection, priming, true self belief and self-confidence that comes from the abundance mentality and outcome independence, and most importantly, holding frame.
Lifting has helped me and caring about my clothes, fashion and grooming has helped. I wasn't a slob before, but getting into a more muscular and toned shape, and buying smart clothes smartly that also are coordinated and fit well, has helped. I'm not super Chad or Brad Pitt, but I've raised my SMV nonetheless and having a little fun getting used to it.
I'm probably like you in that I don't really care too much for spending a lot if time reading up on 'game' and PUA stuff - mainly because the subjects that was designed to attract are not what I would want for more than a week or so - and never for a LTR. But everything I listed above will help with any woman out there.
[–]soulcatcher357 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (0 children)
What state do they live in? This guy could be Brad Pitt. She is totally biding her time until he gets a good 3 years solid income; or a longer marriage for more/longer/permanent alimony.
[–]camelCaseOfBeer 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (1 child)
A happy man is a happy relationship, a happy woman is a miserable man. - Patrice O’Neal
She can’t be happy unless you put yourself first.
[–]uwey 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (0 children)
I think that sums it up.
If man do present value and not to be a loser, it is easy to save and preserve marriage and family. Just like a well performed company can sustain itself because it had healthy debt and income ratio, and consistently build equity.
But a shitty deal will be a hot woman that is very high maintenance (bad debt, like 30% interest depreciation equity) so you would rather rent/loan in long term. Not to get into family deal with long term negative equity is the key. Most young woman had high potential to slowly become negative equity anyway, and their spending habits also another black hole to suck all your energy and money away.
I would certainly fuck hot girl for short term (too much maintenance, switch to not-own but rent) and kept a wife that are appreciative and family oriented.
Man’s lust is short but impulsive, but woman’s lust are long and consistent, man performed like Bit Coin, woman performed like Federal interest rate.....
[–]wanker7171 2 points3 points4 points 1 year ago (0 children)
A man that other women want
You can even see it in the way girls talk to one another too. I'm one of the only guys at my workplace and I feel very confident that I'm the most alpha guy there. With some of the girls, when I give a cheeky reply to a shit test, they'll say to another passing coworker "He's so mean to me." AKA "I get his attention."
[–]DeeplyDisturbed1 4 points5 points6 points 1 year ago (1 child)
This saga does not end here. Women are vindictive.
[–]Flintblood 4 points5 points6 points 1 year ago (0 children)
He can't rest on his new SMV laurels. He'll have to be all aware and ready to frame-up and throw some dread down again at a moment's notice.
fucking younger / hotter girls makes your dick bigger, real talk
[–]nasanhak 3 points4 points5 points 1 year ago (3 children)
Imo it is better to be single/unmarried/divorced than to be with a mentally unstable woman (or even a man) like that
[–]Endorsed Contributorredpillcad[S] -1 points0 points1 point 1 year ago (1 child)
better implies your goals are superior to another man's.
TRP is a toolkit for each man to achieve whatever he wants
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (0 children)
True maybe the ancillary characteristics made the difference. It's not just sticking it to the woman. Did he become a while new person? Looking better, gaining confidence, more energy, improved mood. Why should a woman want the former?
[–]Winterpreter 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (0 children)
That's the best proof for AWALT
[–]DreamBoatGuy25 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (0 children)
For the sake of analysis and so we all don't fall into cognitive bias it should be considered that this could have simply been purely a money issue.
Financial issues are the number one reason for divorce, most of which are initiated by women.
He was having money trouble and his wife was unhappy, he got a new job making a lot more money and his wife suddenly became a lot happier. That's probably the sum of it.
I question the amount of lifting and dread game that could keep a woman in line if her joint bank account wasn't full.
[–]yummyluckycharms 0 points1 point2 points 1 year ago (0 children)
I would hold the horses here.
As stated, wife was angry that he wasnt providing enough moola - and is now happy since he got a better job.
There is also a possibility that she is waiting for the 1 year mark so that his job is stable and she can then divorce him for a higher monthly amount.