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Red Pill TheoryRelaxation is Key for everything (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by Yonski3

I finally understood that the state of relaxation is what I been after all my life. not happiness. not material things, not hooking up with girls and not seeking a purpose or meaning to my life.

a state of Relaxation

When you are totally relaxed you are not bothered with those thoughts about "purpose" or "meaning".

at that moment you are the meaning, you are the purpose.

in fact, next time you find yourself asking yourself: "what is the purpose to my life" or "I need to find a purpose" - that is a clear sign you are not in a state of relaxation.

Relaxation is the key to your happiness.

I mean what the hell is "happy" anyway? can you even be happy 24/7? I guess some insane people are but that's not the way we can live our life.

relaxation is a choice we can make every second, in every situation, the good and the bad.

I make it into a daily practice when I leave the house. I am going to stay relaxed no matter what will happen. that is my life goal. in fact it's the only thing that really matters to me.

nothing will be enjoyable if you are stressed.

you can have sex with the hottest girl you ever met but if you find yourself stressing about it while in the act... then guess what, that experience is not going to be that much fun.

when you are relaxed you feel complete. you feel content. you have everything to give and nothing to achieve. you just need to find the right girl to get that present from you.

You know what I love the most about this relaxation thing?

I know how to achieve it. in my body and in my mind.

honestly if you put some effort into it, its not that difficult.

there are actual things you and me can do right now to relax ourselves. there are proven practices for the body and mind that are 100% efficient to bring more calmness into our lives.

In fact they are so simple the mind doesn't like that. he wants complex solutions to our problems. after all, we have complex problems so the solution have to be complex as well right?

it must be that $5000 workshop on how to find purpose, or reading tons of self help books or going to India to live in an ashram for a year.

I mean it can't be that sitting for 10 minutes relaxing the tension in our body and mind to be the answer to all of our problems right?

It sure fucking can.

Another cool thing is that relaxation is something you can be totally aware of where you stand with. Am I somewhat nervous? am I perfectly calm? you can tell by how your body feels, by the stream of your thoughts in your head.

"I feel some stress in my legs, lets tune it up be putting our attention on it and relaxing it"

"my mind is too active. I will observe my breath for 10 min and calm it down"

It is so much more efficient then having a vague goal like "being happy"

relaxation is key to your success with girls

they tell you to be playful , that girls love it.

Try to be playful and cold approach a girl while you are nervous.

spoiler: it's going to suck ass. you will want to finish the conversation as quickly as possible to make that awful tense feeling in your body to go away. you will try to appear playful and relaxed but your body language and energy will scream: tension.

Now imagine that scenario when you are perfectly calm, perfectly relaxed. it's going to be awesome. even if she tells you to fuck off it's still going to be an interesting experience. no biggie.

You will not be a needy beta when you are relaxed. When you are relaxed you will feel content. Happy with yourself and life. All of sudden all those questions of how how do I behave in this or that scenario will vanish. You will do what you do and since it’s not coming from a place of anxiety and neediness it’s going to work.

you won’t have to fake it till you make it

You will be it.

Few things I do to bring my body and mind into a relaxed state:

  • Meditation - this one is no surprise, the gold standard for relaxation. if you have to choose only one thing from this list, please choose to have a daily meditation routine.

When I sit for my daily meditation I know why I am doing it. I'm doing it to relax.

I do that by widen the gap between the thoughts in my head, to have more empty space. thoughts can cause stress, over thinking can cause anxiety.

  • Avoiding stressful TV shows, movies, etc. this is a big one and I know it won't be easy to many of you. but TV shows and movies can bring a lot of tension into the body, you are watching things you are not suppose to see, for the mind all those horrible things you see on the screen are actually happening and it tense it up. the body as well. even TV shows that you think are "safe" to watch like reality cooking shows are being edited in a way that tense up the body with their sounds effects and quick cuts and edits. try to avoid all that shit.

  • Physical activity. great stress reliever, using up excess energy after sitting for long time. releases good hormones in the brain. Run, walk, lift heavy things (don't over do it though as it can back fire)

  • Being in nature - self explanatory. sitting on the beach or taking a walk in a green area with no cars or people.

  • Calming music, guided meditation, self-Hypnosis, sounds of the ocean. all those stuff can help, do what works for you.

will be awesome if you guys will add more helpful suggestions in the comments.

TL;DR: Relaxation is Key to everything - be calm and relaxed and life will be awesome.


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[–]salinorum 111 points112 points  (7 children)

Nothing teaches me to relax better than sitting in 190 degree sauna for 30 minutes followed by 5 minutes of cold shower, with consistent, slow breathing the method that gets me through the shock of both hot and cold.

And you're completely right, given that women are highly emotionally attuned creatures, doesn't matter at all what you say, but how you feel. If you're tense and try to flirt, it comes across anxiously. If you're relaxed and flirt, it comes across naturally and you establish a mutual connection via emotion and relaxtion

[–]Yonski3[S] 19 points20 points  (5 children)

sauna is a great suggestion, I am going to try it.

[–]puq1 10 points11 points  (2 children)

Sauna is great, but one may not have one easily available.

But I have a bathtub at home. Just taking a slightly "too warm" bath an hour or so before sleep every day has done wonders for my relaxed condition. The quality of the night's sleep improves vastly.

[–]temerity18 -2 points-1 points  (1 child)

Your balls don't tolerate heat. Especially from hot tubs.

[–]salinorum 3 points4 points  (1 child)

its great for your immune system and skin. If i'm feeling anxious, its the quickest way to change my state of mind.

[–]S-Blaze 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Ya cold shower is amazing to empty the mind

[–]East_River_Guide 41 points42 points  (3 children)

This was a common goal in Greek philosophy

See https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ataraxia

[–]Yonski3[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ataraxia

had no idea. this is super interesting.

[–]RedHoodhandles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Or tranquility as the stoics would say.

[–]tempolaca 33 points34 points  (0 children)

Thats why oneitis always makes you fail: Impossible to be relaxed and calmed if you have it.

[–]Irtotallynotrobot 22 points23 points  (2 children)

I heard recently in a Tim Ferris podcast that anxiety is generated by trying to cope with the future or past in the present. It's weird advice but the best way to cut that out is straight up not to think about it.

[–]Noxzeno 13 points14 points  (1 child)

I found that Anxiety is our brain trying to comprehend the "Unknown"

When we think about the past or the future we ponder all the possibilities that could occur from different decisions that have not yet played out.

[–]Irtotallynotrobot 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Makes sense. Or ruminate over how to interpret things that have already played out.

[–]Chaddeus_Rex 18 points19 points  (26 children)

/u/GayLubeOil once told me to work on my stress resistance. He was right. Go do something stressful, like standing on a liberal campus with a Nazi armband or holding a sign that says "Make America Great Again" and firmly argue your beliefs. This stressful event will cause you to be more stress resistant in the future and your level of stress resistance directly relates to your relaxation.

[–]TheGillos 23 points24 points  (10 children)

Nazi armband

That's a good way to die, get injured, or go to prison.

[–]RcskaSedd 5 points6 points  (13 children)

Chaddeus_Rex

That is a bit of naive thing to do and your response to TheGillos was naive as well. There are more natural ways of dealing with stress. You don't have to put yourself in a stress situation, but maybe stressful environments. Cold shower during winter, 190-degree sauna like salinorum mentioned (I've done this before and it is not easy.) Martial arts, high elevation hiking. Backpacking with 50-pound. In order to master relaxation, you need to constantly put yourself in stress. Which is easier? Taking a cold shower everyday, or get in your car, drive and find a university, dress up as a nazi, make a sign, and scream out "MAGA"?? Show some dignity as a man.

[–]permcaulturelover69 4 points5 points  (9 children)

Yeah the nazi comment is the type of shit that really turns me off to the red pill. There's good advice in this community but there's also shit like that. I have to filter a lot of bullshit when reading through these threads.

[–]Chaddeus_Rex 0 points1 point  (8 children)

Lol if you get turned off by Nazis, you are still a cuck. Nazism is the most masculine ideology that exists.

[–]permcaulturelover69 1 point2 points  (3 children)

Go fuck yourself, fascist scumbag.

[–]Chaddeus_Rex 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Lololol proves me right that you are a low-iq normtard, if you cant see why Fascism is masculine.

[–]permcaulturelover69 0 points1 point  (1 child)

You are a genuinely terrible person.

[–]Chaddeus_Rex 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Bahaha why should i care about "being a good person"? Who defines what makes a "good person"? Why should i worry about some social label society gives me of being a "good person" so that society pats me on the head and tells me I'm a good boy?

Continue being a "good person" and an obedient little slave.

[–]ThighSavesLives 0 points1 point  (3 children)

Little bit late to the party, but Fascism is pretty masculine (doesn't work though) while Nazism is just unscientifically supported. The "scientific racism" and anti-Semitism in it is just fucking stupid, and not backed up by any science whatsoever. Nazism is based on a disgust by the Jews after WW1, where the blame of the loss in Germany was heavily shifted onto them in pop culture, and being so disgusted by something so harmless as the stereotypical Jewish person, that you have to legitimately exterminate all of them, is in my eyes, one of the least masculine traits you could possibly carry. It's just illogical and comes out of a complete place of irrational fear and disgust. We're talking about a religious group that refuses to eat something that is slaughtered in a way that causes pain to the animal, people who are good with money, and they have big noses. That's the stereotypical Jewish person, and you're so disgusted by that, it makes you want to commit genocide? That's pretty pussy to me

[–]Chaddeus_Rex 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Fascism works, it was the ideology of Rome and before that Sparta. It requires the society be taught a certain world view the requires them to strive for self improvement and power.

Have you considered why the Jews have been universally hated by everyone since the Romans burnt down Judea? Why the Jews have been persecuted everywhere they went since Roman times? If everyone hates a person, its not everyone elses fault its the persons.

[–]ThighSavesLives 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Fascism doesn't work in a modern, educated society, and you can't change humans being educated now. It worked in Roman times because it was a greatly uneducated society. But the Nazi part is just an illogical fallacy. People have hated Jews for centuries because they have been taught to shift the blame on Jewish people. They were a scapegoat for the black plague, for example, and you cannot tell me that Jewish people were the cause of the black plague. It's the same for many other issues. The Jewish did not cause Germany to lose world war 1. It was their own stupidity trying to involve America in the war by getting Mexico to wage war against America. Also, they we're 1 nation fighting many, and if they wanted to win they should have done a quick knock out blow instead of what happened to them, being the war of attrition that it was. Trench warfare was quite possibly the worse thing that could have happened to the German army. It's just not a logical idea to shift the blame onto Jewish people.

[–]Chaddeus_Rex 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fascism doesn't work in a modern, educated society

Why not? Are you saying that the Germans of the 1930's where poorly educated, when it was the aristocrats who were the first to support the Nazi Party and in Italy University students where amongst the first to support the fascist idea?

And before you talk about Germans of the 1930's being uneducated, i'll have you know that most of the scientific achievements of that era where made by Germans, not Americans or British. In fact the Nazi scientific machine was so powerful that the Soviets and Americans would kidnap Nazi scientist to work on their programs.

Also, check out the medical research that was conducted by Fascist Japan and how far it advanced medical science.

But the Nazi part is just an illogical fallacy. People have hated Jews for centuries because they have been taught to shift the blame on Jewish people.

Why where they taught to 'shift the blame' on jewish people, if jewish people weren't blameless?

The Jewish did not cause Germany to lose world war 1

Actually they did. Jews where the primary driving force behind worker/communist movements in Germany at the time. When the 'proletariat' (headed by Jews) went on strike and stopped producing ammunition/other provisions for the Germans, the Germans lost the war.

It was their own stupidity trying to involve America in the war by getting Mexico to wage war against America

Mexico has nothing to do with it and everything to do with Woodrow Wilson seeing an opportunity to make Europe beholden to America.

Just like in WW2 America came in when the war was already won and claimed victory.

Also, they we're 1 nation fighting many

And they were winning, despite breaking the most important rule of war - do not fight on multiple fronts. They were winning because of their faster mobilization, better discipline, better infrastructure and supply lines as dictated by the "Art of War" by Clauzewitz.

It's just not a logical idea to shift the blame onto Jewish people.

Of course its logical

[–]Chaddeus_Rex 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Why is that undignified to dress up as a Nazi and get yelled at and pushed around by libs?

Sure what you say is one way to work on stress resistance, but the way I suggest submerges you to immense anounts of stress that makes you revert to habitual behaviors. Your goal in this situation would be to remember to keep your cool and not let the stress affect your mind.

What you suggest is endurance. What I suggest is stress resitance.

[–]RcskaSedd 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Stress is about overcoming a challenge. Endurance is apart of stress. I think your idea is creative, but it seems like what you are suggesting isn't very practical and thus makes it a waste fo time. I think you are proposing to find methods that keep our emotions in check. Try meditation. If that is too easy, then try meditating on a bus, or try meditating when people are arguing (not you involved). It is essential to understand that you need to dominate yourself instead of trying to have a situation dominate you. Mindfulness is essential for dealing with stress.

Your goal in this situation would be to remember to keep your cool and not let the stress affect your mind.

Yes, that is why I mention martial arts. Have you ever been kicked in the gut that sends you flying? But you have to continue fighting? It's happening to me sparing. I had to keep my cool and not get angry because an angry fighter loses his control.

[–]Chaddeus_Rex 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Meditation doesn't work for me. At least the breathing exercises don't. I find being cognizant of ones emotions in the moment and telling yourself to feel another one helps.

Yes, that is why I mention martial arts. Have you ever been kicked in the gut that sends you flying? But you have to continue fighting? 

Yes. It hurts. You just have to ignore the pain and focus on the fight.

[–]SilkTouchm 35 points36 points  (10 children)

Meditation should be as mandatory as going to the gym.

[–]MuchFIERCE 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Gym is kinda like meditation though for me since Im in complete focus in the gym

[–]johnpayne10 9 points10 points  (8 children)

It just gets boring. :/

Do you know any method to make meditation fun? xD

[–]SilkTouchm 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Practice. When you reach mindfulness (i.e not thinking about anything), it won't be boring, such a concept won't exist for you. It's only boring to you because you're thinking.

Start with 5 minutes, try really hard to not think about anything. Search for some online guides. It doesn't matter if you fail, just keep doing it and it will come to you.

[–]SoulRedemption 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Try the 'Headspace' meditation app. Its guided meditation which will really help you sink in slowly.

[–]diggrecluse 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Once you get the past the beginner stage, you will notice a change. Now, when I meditate, after about 5-10 minutes I reach a point where I actually want to stay meditating. My mind clears up and I no longer have that intense feeling of needing to think about something or do something. I start enjoying the complete silence and tranquility in my mind.

[–]Babyoil707 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Idk about anyone else but my meditation sessions always eventually turn into a minor psychedelic trip, with closed-eye visuals and feelings of euphoria. The first 10 to 20 minutes are usually boring but evetually it becomes amazing. Just practice consistantly, preferably for the rest of your life, just like working out

[–]SteveStJohn -5 points-4 points  (1 child)

You need a mantra. Try this one. Slowly and calmly say aloud:

"I am wasting my life...right now."

"I will never get this time back."

"While meditating I am not a threat to the establishment."

"They have nothing to fear from me."

"I am obedient."

You can even increase the tempo and volume as you near completion of your meditative moment.

"I AM WASTING MY LIFE...NOW!!!"

[–]jeunpeun99 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Voluntary discomfort. Make discomfort your own (cold showers, no fap, sleeping on the ground etc). You appreciate things better and are less distracted (more relaxed, more comfortable). See one of the top post of this reddit (i_have_been_practicing_stoicism_for_3_years_now), it explains it in greater detail, with more examples. Also read the comments.

[–]XiaoGene 27 points28 points  (4 children)

Ataraxia, Enlightenment, Flow, a state of Relaxation.. When are we going to grow up and stop "escapisming"?
Thank you for your post host, it does give insights.

In my humble opinion however, tension from stress (no matter positive or negative) is just another tool in a man's pocket. It affects your "amplitude of maneuverability" - when you're relaxed, you're a laser, a surgeon's knife and a surgeon yourself; when you're tense - you're a scythe and a reaper (or a needy beta, if you apply your tension wrong).

First and foremost, stress is information - it tells u that something is off, that you are not a master yet, or being insincere. Relaxation, on the other hand, means everything is fine. Host, I don't believe you're suggesting being relaxed in both kinds of situations. And as for me I'd better known when is one and when is another. By applying those relaxation technics when you are stressed you ignore those signals, brush them off - it will help u 9 times of 10, but on the 10th u may die.
Instead of meditating with calm music, meditate with Aurelius - analyze, be sincere, find weak spots, fix them.
To sum up what I'm trying to say I believe, relaxation is a result and a reward - if u know that u did good and are good, while still being nervous - your post is on the spot, u definetely have to relax somehow; if u are a rookie though, the stress (and probably humilating failure) is a price u have to pay to gain that xp points.

[–]MrCongeniality1 14 points15 points  (2 children)

I appreciate your perspective that relaxation should come as a result of putting in effort and being competent in a situation. Except I would say it should be both. You need to work on self-directed relaxation and the precursors for naturally feeling relaxed. It is cyclical.

[–]MakoShark93 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you're stressed and can't relax; you can't think shit through. If you can't think shit through, you won't get to the next stage -- whatever that may be.

[–]ohNole 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I appreciate this post - you hit the nail on the head. My one suggestion is to incorporate "peace" into this. I say this because with peace comes relaxation and happiness. Living w TRP mentality will bring inner-peace and confidence, stepping back and understanding the strength of your frame and perspective will inevitably bring peace and allow you to relax.

I 100% agree that meditation and working out are the major keys to accomplishing this.

[–]DoubleTimeRLTW 8 points9 points  (2 children)

The dichotomy of this, is that relaxation can lead to stagnation. Happy thoughts wont cut it with a 300lb bar on your back, or when work is piling up, or when your grades start slipping. Sometimes you need some stress, you need to be amped up, and you need to get in the zone.

Learn to flip that switch on and off in your head, and it will be like having a reserve tank of NOS when you need it.

[–]erthian 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Learning to push yourself without disaster. Most people would rather die than learn anything before they are absolutely forced into it.

[–]malexander777 10 points11 points  (8 children)

I'll be called a crackpot for this, but it works wonders not only for calmness and peace of mind, but for energy levels, and overall health. This sub is probably open-minded enough for this, so what the hell. I recommend grounding, AKA earthing. Ever wonder where the expression of someone being a "grounded" person comes from?Short documentary if interested: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7qn_YnLudgg

[–]sorry_mommy 9 points10 points  (3 children)

This is literally the definition of pseudoscience. Mixing real scientific principles with made up bullshit that people want to hear and presenting it as science.

[–]Vinterson 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Jup and it's no wonder it works without any magic Effect. You use mindfulness to focus on your feet, actually spend some time with it and you will probably try to do it in a nice Place like nature.

All aspects are relaxing. Combine that with some additional Placebo effect from the pseudoscience and you got a concentrated meditative combination going.

[–]ScumbagJason 1 point2 points  (0 children)

They refrenced studies that implied grounding of patients reduced inflammation.

[–]malexander777 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So you've tried it and noticed no benefit? Also, how did you so quickly conclude that it's "made up bullshit"? You sure it's not just an assumption you're making? Are all the people who notice tremendous benefits delusional?

Also, this idea is competing directly with the pharmaceutical industry. There's not much money it. Whereas there are endless profits in keeping people on prescription drugs to treat symptoms, as opposed to curing them. It's even more profitable if there are side-effects, because then you get to sell more drugs to "treat" those symptoms. Maybe the pharmaceutical industry is where pseudoscience is rampant.

[–]gaberger1 1 point2 points  (1 child)

As a foreign language speaker I am quite confused about this grounding? I thought this means something like you tell your kids if they do something wrong. Like you are grounded, no going out with friends today. But what does this mean in this context?

[–]ScumbagJason 0 points1 point  (0 children)

look at your electric outlet, it has 3 holes. 2 for the power and one is the ground. The ground wire connects directly to the earth.

Kids can get grounded like you said, I think that is an aviation reference if I had to guess. Like grounding a plane meaning landing it/keeping it from flying.

[–]RonieGarret 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Have you tried it? What benefits did you get from it?

[–]phil_stein 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's kooky but seems plausible. Thanks for sharing.

[–]lookoutitscaleb 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I've just added deprivation tank floating twice a month into my regimen.

Incredible!I also take Cold water only showers using wim hof breathing technique. Also incredible.

Plan on adding yoga next month.

Small, incremental improvement.

I find it interesting that so many companies/people/industries sell a thing, an item, an idea.... A something.

People that "do well" don't do ONE thing that does it for them. It's a myriad. It's a life style.

What is your preferred technique for meditation? I was mantra chanting and tried focusing on my breath. Both I practiced for 5 weeks daily without noticeable changes, so I didn't continue the practice.

Great post. I know when I started my journey I didn't know what to do or where to start. Working out led me to healthy eating, to healthy sleeping, to healthy skin care, to self care lifestyle, and the rest is history.

[–]xcrazytx 2 points3 points  (1 child)

you sound relaxed dude lol i read this in the calm spongebob narrator voice

[–]NormalAndy 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Thanks for the post- lots of good information here and in the comments. In the end it is finding out whatever works for you.

The most important part is that you have to do SOMETHING about relaxation. Before the intrusive attention economy came barging into our lives during the last few decades, real free time to relax was an abundant commodity. Nowadays it's a rarity. We con ourselves into thinking that the time we waste on mindless shit counts as mindful relaxation.

It could not be further and many of us need to wake up to that one as it is fast becoming a social disease. The way people treat iPhones is getting to be like the way people used to smoke cigarettes- a sexy, guilty short term dopamine boost pretending to be a relaxing break. It's no surprise that phones have become like this- it's sales and marketing gold. You need to kick the habit and relax in a beneficial way instead.

More than ever, we need to make time to relax and we need to know how to relax.

For the former, I have a timer on the iPhone which, once started, means I can't fuck around with the thing for 30 minutes. That's key becaue relaxation is NOT being glued to the screen, swiping, texting etc- your attention should be introspecive- making sure it is truly your time- all about you- continuing to bring your attention back to yourself. If I can't manage that then I candirectily question my own honesty and how I am deluding and harming myself.

For the latter, lots of great suggestions on this thread.

But the OP is totally right: Just reading that last paragraph back to myself makes me realise why my daily meditation is the true gold. Contantly bringing my attention away from mind and back to the breath is great practice for concentrating on what I have to do in real life- succeeding despite all the petty distractions and bullshit.

[–]Yonski3[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Great comment. can you tell me the name of that timer app that lock's up your phone for 30 min?

[–]NormalAndy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh it doesn’t lock it up- it’s just symbolic. In any case Insight Timer.

[–]Dyonises 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This post is golden. Its bullshit that TRP is quarentined, really.

[–]Natural_Difficulty 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is a great post. You have my respect

[–]Luckyluke23 1 point2 points  (1 child)

best relaxation i have found is ASMR.

go look some up on youtube and find out what you like. I find it's the quickest and best way to get in a relaxed state.

[–]Yonski3[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

thanks I am going to check it out tonight,

[–]THEdirtyDotterFUCKr 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Sounds good in practice on how to prepare yourself for the day. In handling situations at hand, I ask myself 3 questions in dealing/fixing problems that come up everyday.

Can I fix it?

Can someone else fix it?

Will I die if it does not get fixed?

on the surface it may seem that I pawn off work whenever possible, but there are times that I do not know how to fix/work/deal with a problem. So this is an opportunity to learn from whomever ends up fixing the issue. Essentially amending and extrapolating from "What does not kill me can only make me stronger" and amending into "what does not kill me can only make me better (if I learn from it)"

[–]refelgallo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I try to live by “what doesn’t kill me makes me stronger” but in the lifting sense. But I like your take on it “... make me better”

[–]rafaelvicuna4 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Needed this post, for life in general. Thanks so much

[–]Yonski3[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thanks, i'm super glad to hear

[–]extragreensauce 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Grabbing a 40 and listening to the radio in my car with my seat warmer on while texting bitches is my zen

[–] points points

[permanently deleted]

[–]Tre_Walker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was surprised when EFT/Tapping worked for me and has been reliable over the past 5 years.

https://www.google.com/search?q=eft

Also GABA and L-Theanine for supplements.

[–]DavidEagle68 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I literally said this to a woman last night. I told her I no longer stress and bitch about things 2-3 months down the road. I live in the moment, and I told her "we need to be present," and she eventually was bent over 5-6 minutes later.

[–]BlueFreedom420 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't know if I can subscribe to this. I feel that knowing your struggle and keeping close to your struggle seems to keep you awake.

[–]johnpayne10 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Beer!!!! Beer helps to relax.

[–]TheFallingCosmos 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Great bit of information right here but almost every time you used the word "relax" it should have been "relaxed" instead. Just some constructive criticism for you but great post nonetheless

[–]Yonski3[S] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Thanks for that, english is not my first language (as you could probably tell ) so I appreciate the grammar help. fixed that.

[–]TheFallingCosmos 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's all good my man. Great info, keep posting more helpful content. Good luck with future endeavours

[–]faustian_talos 0 points1 point  (4 children)

I really want to achieve this and 100% agree with you that we need to be in this state as much as we can.

But meditation is a fail for me. I just can not spend 30min doing nothing (unless it is sleeping). I would rather spend 30min doing something useful and practical.

I guess meditation is not for everyone.

Do you any other state to achieve this?

[–]Yonski3[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

don't start with 30 min, start with 5 or even 3 min and build yourself up to it.

try counting your breath's to build up your focus.

if this still doesn't work for you, try some guided meditation for relaxation, there are lot's of free stuff on youtube.

[–]SilkTouchm 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Meditation is not "doing nothing". Meditation is doing something useful and practical.

[–]orangebudd 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What yonksi3 say's. Take it easy (Relax you know) 10 minutes is a good start.

Focus on nothing but the moment is what really helped me to destress. But only after i read the book "the power of now"by eckhard tolle. Its really eye opening as to WHY we have those stresses in our body.

[–]Fulp_Piction 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Recently read Epictetus' The Enchiridion - 50 odd maxims, read it in a day. Pure gold so far for managing anxiety and gaining perspective. I'd recommend it to anyone here.

That book and a little meditation are all you really need afaic.

[–]zfrogo 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Can you further explain the tv thing ?

[–]Yonski3[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sure, TV shows and movies are usually built around Drama and conflicts, we get emotionally involve in that - that causes stress in the body.

[–]MasterShake777 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My first boxing trainor would always say, "Relax; take your time." Still the best advice Ive ever recieved to this day

[–]diggrecluse 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is an interesting viewpoint. I've been stuck trying to figure out my purpose, goal, mission in life and how to achieve "lasting happiness." But that has not happened.

What I have noticed, however, is exactly what you're talking about. When I meditate, go for walks, read Stoic books and do other things to calm and clear my mind, the constant need for finding happiness or purpose does not even matter. I feel content and grateful for what I have. And I want to share that feeling with other people.

Having said that, I think it's still important to have drive in your life and an ultimate goal.

[–]kahunaburger12 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is so true. I've always struggle with oneitis since I was 16. And mere knowledge of TRP, although helpful was not helping. I'm now doing dynamic meditation (DM) (OSHO), and this has been profound. I've never been this clear-headed, composed and i think it helps in my frame a lot. I can clearly detached from my feelings and let it subside when shitty-needy thoughts comes in. This are the effects i felt after doing it for 5 days straight. I used to do DM sporadically before, it gave instant relaxation but now I'm doing it daily, and its effect is growing beyond what I'd imagined. Will continue to do so for 21 days.

ps 1: passive meditation, or any commercialised "western" meditation is not designed for the modern man, hence the need for a DM one. See Eliot Hulse if you don't like the mambo-jumbo of OSHO.

ps 2: I have done many kinds of meditation and yoga since i was a kid. Mom is into spiritualism AND being a Hindu helps for me to see this differences.

[–]tolerantman 0 points1 point  (1 child)

When I meditate or use other relaxation techniques, my muscles relax but my heart stays tense, high circulation and adrenaline... I wonder if I have a problem...

[–]kahunaburger12 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeap, check out on Dynamic meditation- there are suppressed stuff inside you.

[–]Ansec 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A good massage, a cigar, a glass of bourbon, and a warm night. Bliss

[–]ghostokg 0 points1 point  (3 children)

I've found that a combination of Ashwagandha KSM 66 and Magnesium Citrate really promotes a natural relaxed mood.

[–]HappyScribe 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Magnesium Citrate is a powerful laxative.

[–]zaelb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are many supplements out there but the ones you mention and perhaps l theanine would i consider go tos because many people seem to respond very well to them