Field Report“…And Lucy Tries Harder” (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by Senior ContributorOmLaLa

TL;DR- A newer plate has issues with an older plate and tries to cause problems.

“…And Lucy Tries Harder”

I ...had a plate named Lucy.

Bright blonde, blue-eyed definition of submission.

One of those “quiet as a church-mouse" types. The one’s that speak real soft and always look at their feet when they speak.

Lucy was jealous of Fine China (another plate).

To be more specific, Lucy was jealous of how FC looked.

Lucy'd seen one of FC's racier pictures on my phone. Fine China’s better looking and she knows it.

So she gets insecure. Comfort tests increase. “Am I enough for you?” “Why me?” Etc. etc. My plates know about each other so whatever. They just never bump into each other (Except Candy and FC but that’s something else).

At least until last night.

Fine China makes Katsudon (my favorite). She comes over and we eat. Lucy texts and asks if I’m available.

Om: no

Lucy asks why.

Om: busy

She begs. She pleads. Says that she has to see me tonight.

Om: chinas here

More begging. More pleading. I put my phone on silent. Me and Fine China get busy.

Not 10 minutes in there’s a knock at the door. Already know who it is. We ignore it. Another knock. We ignore it again.

By the third knock I’d had it. I answer the door. Guess who.

She just stood in the doorway. She just stares at her feet. Like a guilty puppy-dog. Doesnt say a word. Maybe she was cold.

”I’m busy.”

She asks if FC’s still here.


She pours out this long. winded. schpeel. about some hoorrible thing some sleazy guy had done at the party just left.

The "horrible thing" was vague and ill-defined. Still don't know what it was.

Question 1: Does the oddly-convenient the timing of this “traumatic incident” and how it just so happened to take place immediately following her knowledge of FC being over fall under mere coincidence or as a means of justification of action?

a) Justification. It would be difficult for anyone to rationally believe that level of coincidence in timing and to overlook such an obvious plea for validation.

b) Coincidence. You weren’t there so you never know.

c) Neither. She just thinks you’re stupid.

(the correct answer was A.)

She makes a comment about Fine China.

“She’s pretty.”

Translation: She makes me feel insecure. Not used to being outclassed I guess.


She asks to come in. Says she won’t say or do anything. That she just doesn’t want to be alone or at home.

Truth is she wants to cunt-block Fine China. I tell her

“No. Go home.”

Gaslighting comes next. She tries to guilt trip. “So you would leave some poor traumatized girl out in the cold when she needs you?”

…I close the door.

Standing there and talking to her would be giving her exactly what she wanted: giving her attention over FC.

And I’m not pissed nor surprised by it. Just sort of… done.

She knew what she was doing was crazy. No need to reaffirm that for her.

I come back and Fine China makes some snide remark, something about thirsty bitches and not enough Gatorade. I don’t respond.

We finish where we left off, she leaves after. I check my phone. 12 missed calls. 8 text messages. All from Lucy.

The first few texts were pretty aggressive and “gaslight-y”. Yadda yadda, I thought you were a better man than that. Blah blah, a real man wouldn’t treat a girl like that.

Then the comfort tests.

“…but I always know how to fuck shit up. Cuz that’s what I do. That’s who I am.” “I’m a pain in the ass and someone that no one wants. Someone that is worthless and replaceable.”

What killed me though (although it didn’t surprise me) was how not one of her texts gave any inkling of an apology. No “I’m sorry for showing up unannounced, but..” or “sorry for interrupting, but…”.

All she did was play the “victim”:

  • I’m a pain in the ass

  • someone that no one wants

  • Someone that is worthless and replaceable

  • some poor traumatized girl out in the cold

  • doesn’t want to be alone

Question 2: Why didn’t Lucy admit or acknowledge guilt over her reckless, impulsive and sporadic behavior? (Experienced RPers, please don’t answer.)

a) Because she’s crazy.

b) Because she’s menstruating so it’s okay.

c) Because what she did was okay. Women should get a pussy pass because women are special and should always be treated with respect and chivalry.

d) Because she doesn’t feel guilty. And that’s the point. She felt justified. She felt bad not being the prettiest, she didn’t like it, she’s the most important person ever (to her) and so she was gonna do something about it and sort it all out later. So she came over with the specific purpose of cunt-blocking the girl that made her feel bad, failed, saw no fault in her actions but fault in us for not “sympathizing” with her.

(The correct answer was D.)

I step outside to smoke.

Surprise surprise. Lucy’s still in the parking lot.

I don’t look in her car’s direction. I finish my smoke, lock my doors, ignore my phone and sleep.

Lesson Learned

“Treat every woman like a loaded gun”.

All it took for Lucy was to know that the another woman being “prettier than her” for shit to get psychotic. You never know how light a gun’s trigger will be. You never know what might set it off. And we’re not Neo.

The only way for us to dodge a bullet is to point the gun away from us.

Consider Lucy nexted.

[–]mrpCamper 264 points265 points  (7 children)

Who wants to bet that Lucy is also dating some beta bux guy who wanted to become exclusive and this was her last ditch effort to get OmLaLa to commit before committing with the second place prize?

[–][deleted] 58 points59 points  (2 children)

Hmmm... a "quiet as a church-mouse" girl who happens to be a dating and fucking a known "player" who doesn't commit. Certainly fits the bill.

[–]RojoEscarlata 25 points26 points  (1 child)

It's a stereotype at this point.

[–]cucumber_vaccine 34 points34 points [recovered]

Have you heard the phrase "extinction burst"? It describes this phenomenon perfectly: http://youarenotsosmart.com/2010/07/07/extinction-burst/

The burst is a temporary increase in a behavior that usually precedes a reward, a plea from the recesses of your psyche as soon as the conditioned response is no longer yielding results.

[–]notevenatthestart 3 points4 points  (1 child)

That's an excellent contribution; thanks for posting it. It's a phenomenon everyone knows about but it's very useful to see it laid out and discussed there. I don't know if it's already been covered but I think it'd make a good post of its own, tied in with this and expanded to include habit-forming behaviours in the "monk mode" phase.

[–]fingerthemoon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just what I needed to read right now. Thanks.

[–]RedPharaohRising 103 points104 points  (10 children)

The ex used to do this.
For a while we did long distance. 9pm I tell her I'm heading out. Friday night. Party.
Happy as a lark till I mention this. Suddenly feels depressed and suicidal. Misses her family. Wishes she were dead. I wonder if she'd have felt any of those things had she not seen the pregaming photos with girls with better tits, better asses and way more style.

Blows my phone up with texts till I lose frame and fight with her and head home, my night out successfully ruined.
If I go back in time I'll slap this version of me upside the head and drop kick him till the phone breaks. Smh at the stupid stupid nigga I used to be

[–]becredible 42 points43 points  (2 children)

Every girl will do her best to try to break your frame and change you. And once she does, she will move on to another person that was like who you were to begin with. (That's paraphrased from Beige Philip.)

[–]Fulp_Piction 1 point2 points  (3 children)

How did you break up with her and her suicidal tendencies?

I'm dating a chick, no word of depression or well-hidden scars until months in. I love her, she's great a lot of the time but fuck me if she doesn't get on my tits with her Lucy like behaviour. How do you get past this suicidal shit? I know its bs, but there's always a 'what if'.

[–]RedPharaohRising 6 points7 points  (2 children)

She dumped me. I'd like to say I baited her into it, but, well, AWALT. I had anxiety and depression, and she had just gotten an admit to the college of her dreams, so she called me pathetic and dumped me.

When her life was shit, I was the only person to give her the time of day. When things got better, I was the first person she turned her back on.

Fuck that cunt.

[–]Fulp_Piction 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Shit, been there too.

You dodged a bullet and found rp though, that's winning. How longs it been?

[–]RedPharaohRising 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Nine months since it ended

[–]Nudity_Is_Freedom 2 points2 points [recovered]

Like this sort of thing? Because that sounds right pathogical.

[–]RedPharaohRising 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Some of them certainly, but hell, half this things could apply to the average guy on a bad day.

What stands out to me - both on this list and IRL, was her victim mentality. She was selectively faithful to her Lord, and would rage against him when things didn't turn out well. Sweetheart, the big man in the sky is ignoring you, at least he's not focusing on you.

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon 131 points132 points  (43 children)

Great FR as always.

Lucy was making you choose. A last hurrah. "It's her or me". Making you choose between her (with added girls-as-victim to sweeten the deal) and FC.

She put you in a position where you would have to choose.

Next. Or in your case... Same :)

[–]Senior ContributorOmLaLa[S] 85 points86 points  (39 children)

She expected consolation because that's what "any other guy" would do. She's new.

Next for sure. My inbox is flooded right now with her nonsense.

[–]reigorius 26 points27 points  (37 children)

How are you going to next her? Ignoring, telling her why (seems fruitless) or vague text explaining you guys don't fit?

[–]Senior ContributorOmLaLa[S] 45 points46 points  (35 children)

Can't hard next this one. Too unpredictable. She might show up on my doorstep again.

[–]McLarenX 68 points69 points  (5 children)

What she said happened at the "party" had the inklings of a false rape claim, so be careful.

[–]NSmaf 23 points24 points  (2 children)

“…but I always know how to fuck shit up. Cuz that’s what I do. That’s who I am.” “I’m a pain in the ass and someone that no one wants. Someone that is worthless and replaceable.”

As long as he saves these texts I think he has a pretty fine case

[–]billcosbyeatsbabies 7 points8 points  (1 child)

save the texts, good one. also i would invite FC over to fuck again but this time playfully introduce a camera to the fun and suggest we film so that i can have something to look at later. once i get her consent on video, we commence in the casual sex and that way there is hard proof that she was not raped. once i'm finished, she leaves my house and i hard next the fuck out of her. that way there is absolutely zero chance of saying she got raped. it's the perfect nail in the coffin, if played off the right way.

[–]systemshock869 13 points13 points [recovered]

Meh.. the false rape hysteria is almost as bad as the rape hysteria sometimes. Of course it's a far less serious accusation but when has logic been on our side? Paranoia like that should be reserved for the idiots that think they're going to get raped around every dark corner. I say this, not because I don't think it's prudent to protect yourself, but because "some sleazy guy hit on me" is every basic bitch's story to try to make schmucks jealous and/or to create some sort of validation for themselves. Shit, if a girl is really adamant about the "sleazy" part, there's a decent chance she actually did something with him and wants to start putting the idea in your mind that she is repulsed by him - womanese translation: exactly the opposite of what she said. In OP's situation this is unlikely, but I digress.

Anyways to me it just sounds like solipsism combined with zero imagination.

[–]McLarenX 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The reason why I had red flagged this was the emotion she was putting behind a seemingly minor sexual slight. In her mind, sexual activity is something that she's demonstrated can be used as a manipulative tool. Every woman believes this to some extent, but this seems to be an extreme case of that.

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (5 children)

Watch out with that one! Those types of girls will FUCK you up, it's always the quiet ones too!

[–]TheBluPill 10 points11 points  (4 children)

The loud ones are just as dangerous.

[–]billcosbyeatsbabies 11 points12 points  (3 children)

what about the medium volume hoes?

[–]RP15 4 points5 points  (1 child)

The average of both extremes.

[–]notevenatthestart 7 points8 points  (0 children)

So what we're saying here is, essentially, AWALT.

[–]UniversalFapture 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Then do what you did before. Slam the door. Ignore and let her ass stare at the floor.

Hehe. I rhymed

[–]Its_the_other_tj 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I had a similar situation with a crazy plate. Showed up unannounced outside of my place and saw me leaving with another girl. Flipped her shit in a phone call later that day. Showed up that night (also unannounced) so I sat her down and gave her a little this is over talk (and collected my $160 birthday present and a little breakup sex) and sent her on her way.

She crazied up my life for a week or two. Random knocks on my door numerous texts (87 at last count) phone calls, and even found the other girl on social media and begged her to "give me back to her" (because I'm property now?), even going so far as to show up at my job a few times.

I ignored every attempt. Admittedly I almost caved at the threesome offer, but decided it wasn't worth the risk. Eventually it slowed to the occasional hey there text or drunken 2 am attempted booty call which is far more manageable. My anecdotal advice would be a strict no contact and let it blow over. I think it even had the side effect of raising my smv with a few hotties I work with (oh she's so pretty, she wants him so bad, and he wants nothing to do with her? I'll take a little unforseen preselection). But obviously ymmv on this.

[–]Pinkmistiscool 6 points7 points  (1 child)

OK, similar situation with the girl going off the deep end, ultimatums, sends messages forgiving ME like I did anything wrong, but never apologized. Like your situation she showed up at my place and I was able to ignore the problem right then, but how are u gonna next ur girl and maintain a safety net against further crazy incursions?

[–]no_face 8 points9 points  (6 children)

Beta Radiance. Take her out to dinner. Lavish compliments. Act insecure, jealous, etc., etc.

Once attraction cools, you can hard next.

[–]fearl3ss 40 points41 points  (1 child)

No at this point she'll lap it up. If you are a hard alpha with a girl and then flip to beta, it can be one of the most psychologically addicting things to a woman. she has temporarily "changed you." after a year or two she'll get sick of you again, but it's a terrible way to hard next.

[–]ChairBorneMGTOW 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Given how little validation Om's given her, she'll fucking latch on and hang on for dear life if he started doing so now - it could take YEARS for her to get bored of him. Who has that kind of time?! Plus, when the dump does come, she'll be doubly vindictive.

[–]ihateyouguys 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Strongly disagree. I think it's inadvisable to spend any time:

a) with someone you don't like anymore

b) practicing beta behavior

c) deliberately being inauthentic

[–]billcosbyeatsbabies 3 points4 points  (0 children)

good brainstorming, but as fearl3ss mentioned it will not work out.

[–]TheRealMewt 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You could look into a no-contact order against her. Seriously, protect yourself if she's that unpredictable.

[–]1Chockrit 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I would hard next. Block the number and move the fuck on. Sucks that she knows where OP lives.

[–]ColdEiric 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Read 48 laws of power? All what I could think of when I finished reading this, was the law about avoiding the unhappy and unlucky.

[–]Stonish 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Just tell me if Im correct - if Om would chose Lucy he would enter her frame and lose both of them as a result right?

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not before a huge emotional shitstorm ...

[–]Senior Contributordr_warlock 67 points68 points  (7 children)

Standing there and talking to her would be giving her exactly what she wanted: giving her attention over FC.

If you do not placate to her whims, she will settle for chaos. She does not care about what is being said, only thay you remain present and engage. Every second beyound a simple exit is validation, it's dignifying her feelings with your energy and response. It shows that her nonsense is worth entertaining. Women can only stir up drama when you give them an emotion to work with. They'll warp it, expand it, and transform it to whatever her feelz desire in order to create more feelz. Eventually, she'll attempt to end the fiasco by pinning the blame on you and come out on top as the good guy, you the bad guy. Don't give it to them. Women can't continue without an emotion to work with. Do not argue with women.

edit: /u/omlala please tell me you're dropping the bitch? This is unacceptable behavior. What gets me is that if a man were to do this, he would have the police called on him (who would have arrived promptly) for stalking and harassment, accussed of being a butthurt creepy loser who wasnt good enough and needs to get over it.

[–]RedPharaohRising 26 points27 points  (3 children)

Sheds some light on the idea of "hell hath no fury like a woman scorned". Not because they're capable of worse, that's still men, but because they will literally stop at nothing to get the outcome they desire.
Perfectly great guy, veteran, war hero, family man, community chief? None of that matters when a women 'feels' rejection. Tar and feather him, sit him on the back of a donkey and parade him through town.
For a woman, emotions are her 'crack'. Who needs roid rage when you can get it from feelz?

[–]user_none 16 points17 points  (2 children)

I've seen firsthand the Woman Scorned thing, and it's really scorched Earth type scary shit. What I witnessed was women that once they went down the road of vindictiveness, all actions spiraled out of control. It's downright terrifying.

[–]RedPharaohRising 7 points8 points  (0 children)

"scorched earth" - perfect phrase for the situation.

[–]Senior ContributorOmLaLa[S] 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Yeah no Lucy's donezo. Got her texts and voicemails for backup. Just in case. The girl's wicked unstable.

[–]night-addict 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A question there, actually. Did you have any idea of Lucy's instability before this? Any red flags? If you did, why did you wait for this moment to occur if you had warning? If you didn't, that's pretty scary.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Warlock you know women to a fucking T. Not sure how the fuck you can articulate shit so well

[–]Hiimusog 94 points95 points  (4 children)

This is what a field report should fucking look like.

Notice the complete absence of humble brags and irrelevant nonsense, just a succinct post highlighting the main RELEVANT points of the post.

[–]the_number_2 8 points9 points  (0 children)

With some actual lessons learned, as opposed to the usual:

Lessons Learned

  1. Don't get married
  2. AWALT
  3. Plate, plate, plate

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ya, I like how he called out behavior in specific terms, and then actually applied RP theory to specific behaviors in breakdowns.

I mean, it helps that it's OmLaLa so it's good writing and relevant points, but still.

[–]RedPistola 15 points16 points  (0 children)

d) Because she doesn’t feel guilty. And that’s the point. She felt justified. She felt bad not being the prettiest, she didn’t like it, she’s the most important person ever (to her) and so she was gonna do something about it and sort it all out later. So she came over with the specific purpose of cunt-blocking the girl that made her feel bad, failed, saw no fault in her actions but fault in us for not “sympathizing” with her.

What Om describes here is female solipsism and rationalization (hamster). The female psych has evolved to incorporate these psychological functions to promote natural Machiavellianism (they are never at fault). The moment a negative emotion crosses a woman's mind, the hamster takes swift action to remove it. Simply put, women are not attached to reality. Not only do women twist their stories in their recounting to others, they truly believe their own lies.

Women are most comfortable with the victim narrative. It alleviates them of responsibility, and manipulates men into assuming the hero's role. In this particular case, Lucy victimizes herself in two instances:

  • She was traumatized at a party
  • She's a pain in the ass


While a seasoned veteran like Om could easily see through her facade, the majority of men would be duped into sympathizing with her attempt at victimhood. Her second attempt was rather weak, she must be new.

[–]Letsbeserioushere 11 points12 points  (6 children)

Girls pull the "I'm a traumatised victim, help!" card all the time. In the case you outlined, closing the door on her was the right thing to do.

However, what would you do in situations where an indifferent next would have negative social repercussions?

For example, people see you walking away from a princess in distress and resent you for it. You now have people who will talk shit about you and try to damage your reputation. Rationalising out of this doesn't work because white-knights and feminism, and walking away from these people may not be possible (e.g if they work/attend Uni with you).

Reading the 48 Laws of Power has me thinking about these issues more. OmLaLa, how would you approach this?

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

However, what would you do in situations where an indifferent next would have negative social repercussions?

You have to look at the bigger picture and see what actions would lead to social repercussions, and avoid that scenario. 'not dropping plates in public' is probably great advice.

[–]CornyHoosier 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Outside of college ... no one gives a shit about social repercussions. As long as you're not on Facebook talking shit about blind, crippled, retarded children on Christmas; you'll likely stay out of the public eye.

Plus, I learned to keep a low profile. For instance: my next door neighbor doesn't even know my name, my job is so secure/locked-down they won't even verify with someone I work there, I have no social media, I change my phone number and email pretty often through Google and none of my friends will give two seconds of thought to some crazy woman who would try and slander me.

[–]notevenatthestart 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You don't put yourself in a position where "people who will talk shit about you" have an effect on your life. You don't get involved with anyone at work and you make sure you're active in a number of different social groups, so at worst the damage is compartmentalised.

Obviously work and university aren't the same in this regard, and it'd be absurd to suggest avoiding all girls at your university, but it might make sense to keep things entirely professional with the hot girl in your seminars if having her spread gossip about you in the future could adversely affect your studies and your future career.

No one law of power is entirely relevant here where the rule is the basic principle of "limit your exposure", but there are echoes of it in law 20 ("do not commit to anyone") tempered by law 18 ("do not build fortresses to protect yourself- isolation is dangerous"). Law 5 ("so much depends on reputation") isn't so relevant in this case, where the reputation is a local one. Law 47 ("do not go past the mark you aimed for; in victory learn when to stop") is useful too; the hot girl in the seminar could be going too far. Best just to have her wanting you and leave it there.

[–]1v1mebruh 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think the common answer for your proposed situation has been "feign weakness and BP unattractiveness to get her to next you". Doesn't sound fun but definitely has the least fallout.

[–]DonaldJTrump2k16 24 points25 points  (2 children)

What do you think she was honestly expecting? Was she expecting you to come to her rescue like a good white knight beta would? Had you even given any hint of you stooping to such a low level to her to where she thought this was a good idea?

Wish we got more posts like this. Educational and a good read that is interactive for the person reading it.

[–]notevenatthestart 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I've said it before, but OmLaLa's posts really ought to be required reading. If you haven't already read it, his "Such is My Nature" from 7 months ago is a classic, both because of what it says and how he draws the reader into thinking about it by writing an allegory.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah I have the feeling she wanted to play the game and win, then would get bored of him once he did stoop to him. That's female nature, destroy and move on.

[–]Lefeudufou 35 points36 points  (4 children)

The real Lesson Learned is that /u/OmLaLa is drowning in pussy

[–]Moolg86 22 points23 points  (1 child)

gotta swim to the butt now

[–]Regularguygamebrah 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Skeet skeet skeet, water gun.

[–]Danedina 8 points9 points  (0 children)

and that the chick at the party who is giving you luke-warm reactions is actually waiting for Chad to call her back. Be Chad or go home.

[–]fingerthemoon 4 points5 points  (0 children)

More like surfing than drowning.

[–]1ErasmusOrgasmus 17 points18 points  (14 children)

/u/OmLaLa has this encouraged you to reconsider allowing your plates to know about each other?

Personally, this kind of unnecessary drama is exactly why I operate a 'don't ask, don't tell' policy whenever I've had multiple plates or a plate + ONSs. Allowing Lucy to see a picture of a hotter plate on your phone was asking for trouble.

[–]Senior ContributorOmLaLa[S] 22 points23 points  (10 children)

Nah. Knowing of each others cool. It's the meeting and greeting that'll fuck things up.

[–]freeman84 17 points18 points  (5 children)

But don't you think that by telling Lucy that FC was over, instead of staying vague, with being "busy", you incited the whole drama to occur in the first place?

[–]Senior ContributorOmLaLa[S] 2 points3 points  (4 children)

Maybe. The truth's better dread game though. I don't hide being with women from women. Teaches them they're not so special (least not to me).

[–]CornyHoosier 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Exactly. No need to hide anything if you're truthful/blunt.

[–]1aguy01 1 point2 points  (1 child)

She will fill in the blanks with her crazy imagination. In my experience open discussion forces them to address the issue, and they will be down or go crazy, but they last longer and with better behavior when you are vague and don't admit or deny. Just my opinion.

[–]fingerthemoon 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I with you on that one. There are other ways to teach them their not special without triggering jealousy directly. It's one thing if she suspects and another if she knows. Just asking for trouble like in OP.

Let them know you're not committed and that should be enough. If she sees you with someone then she was warned. Letting her know you're with another girl RIGHT NOW like OP did will stir the crazy.

Another thing, how did she see the picture of FC? Don't you lock your phone, or just showing off to increase your smv in her eyes. Sounds like dangerous games to me.

[–]fingerthemoon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think your real mistake was opening the door. That was validation in and of itself. You already knew she be crazy from all the text and calls.

[–]1ErasmusOrgasmus 2 points3 points  (1 child)

You admitted that she only turned up because she knew your other girl was hotter and she wanted to fuck shit up with her. This can't happen when she doesn't even know the other girl exists.

I think you're creating a rod for your own back by being open with them.

[–]Regularguygamebrah 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think this guys game, SMV and frame are so tight you can't even imagine a world where he handles bitches in the manner that he actually does.

Lucky lefty expects a seven. To be as confident as Ommy, you have to be that confident. No halfsteppin.

[–]MarvelousWhale 3 points4 points  (1 child)

I was caught of guard when I read you had opened the door.

I wouldn't have answered the door, would have texted her that I walked to the park with fine china for the night, or said china picked you up to visit at her place, or something along those lines that would have suggested she is wasting her time knocking on your door since you weren't home.

Has the added benefit of explaining why your car might still be in the parking lot near your house.

[–]Senior Endorsed Contributormax_peenor 9 points10 points  (2 children)

They always seem to find out about each other in the long run. You have to be happy with breaking the lot and starting over every six months or juts dealing with the consequences. And perhaps the cost of restraining orders...

[–]1ErasmusOrgasmus 1 point2 points  (1 child)

No doubt. If they find out about each other in the end then you just deal with it but it's not something you want to happen.

My point is that OP was open about it and that was really the root cause of this drama (which could have ended much worse). Why not just keep your mouth shut about your other women and live in peace for as long as possible? I see no benefit in being openly forthcoming with the truth in this scenario, you're asking for trouble.

[–]fingerthemoon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He was strait up showing her pictures of FC on his phone, telling her she was at his house right now, provoking crazy.

Looks like an overuse of preselection and dread. Heavy handed imo.

[–]TRP VanguardCyralea 8 points9 points  (2 children)

AWALT. We don't just say it to shit on women. Thing with women is they're actually pretty clever at hiding their faults, at least initially. Takes a little bit of stress to bring out their childish behavior.

I'd sooner expect a genuine apology from Kim Jong-Un's dead father than Lucy-types. They never seem to learn either.

[–]Senior Contributordr_warlock 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Civility is a woman's facade.

[–]RPsage 7 points8 points  (1 child)

You have good taste in food, katsudon is amazing.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (2 children)

People are probably gonna push for the threesome angle, but you've already said it, FC is hotter than Lucy, being considered for the threesome and thus a higher position in your life is a reward, you don't reward her because she's acting out about her position in the totem pole, you reward them for contributing and doing what you tell them to.

It would be different if Lucy pushed for the threesome because it would mean she's trying to fight for your affections, but she's probably so used to being waited on hand and foot that she expects to get her way in that you change your plans with FC for her.

Also, is FC a Jap or just cooks katsudon because you like it? Either way quality plate material

Great FR as always Om, always interesting to see the inner mechanics of a soft harem.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (3 children)

Om: no

Lucy asks why.

Om: busy

She begs. She pleads. Says that she has to see me tonight.

Om: chinas here

More begging. More pleading. I put my phone on silent. Me and Fine China get busy.

I usually consider you a flawless contributor but I'm a bit surprised by this. Why do you even message back at all? I'm guessing you are throwing preselection in her face by being so direct (in the third message), but she is already a plate and completely ignoring her (or maybe just sending the first message) would've implied what you said anyway and, in my opinion, greatly reduced the risk of some crazy shit happening.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Nobody is perfect. It was a good male shit test.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It is also a test for her. If she cannot suck it up, she is not good plate material.

[–]Endorsed Contributorredpillbanana 11 points12 points  (2 children)

This is one reason I love living in a highrise condo. Crazies won't make it past security.

[–]Senior Contributordr_warlock 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Nah, they run stealth. She gets to your room has you fuck her rough. Writes a suicide note that says you raped her, with fake tears and cut herself, then jumps out your window.

[–]sundaybrunch11 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Honest question /u/OmLaLa :

What if when she came to the door, you give her a little bit of comfort and tell her that you'll meet at a later date. The purpose of which is to give her some assurance. You're still maintaining frame at all times of course.

[–]Senior EndorsedMattyAnon 4 points5 points  (0 children)

What if when she came to the door, you give her a little bit of comfort

This isn't a comfort test. The being-upset is leverage and manipulation, not a problem you could ever fix. Give her an inch and she'll take a mile, and the one after that.

[–]T0000009 21 points22 points  (4 children)

Question 2: Why didn’t Lucy admit or acknowledge guilt over her reckless, impulsive and sporadic behavior?

Answer: In story form --]> Sally spent 6 months researching the most lethal handgun ammunition, she also went to 97 gun shows during that time, during this time Sally consulted with hundreds of veteran shooters, police, and military people to determine the absolute best possible combination of weapon and ammunition. Once Sally had saved the money she went out and made her purchase, with an additional 30 day wait for her back round check on top.... Once the weapon was in her possession, and now finally loaded she walked 2 blocks across town and shot Dave's dog 93 times........

You need to fully accept and totally understand that Sally is completely innocent and had absolutely nothing to do with the death of Dave's dog.

The word... yeah... that one on the tip of your tongue.... It's accountability!

[–]well-ok-then 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Not even a pretend insincere apology. The mind reels!

[–]T0000009 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nope.... And Sally wont ever consider making one... She's innocent

[–]putinbusch 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wut. Is this based on a real story?

[–][deleted] 9 points10 points  (2 children)

this is where you let Lucy slip off the spinning stick and break, correct?

[–]Senior ContributorOmLaLa[S] 10 points11 points  (1 child)

Right. Long as FC's in the picture there will be problems.

[–]haxurmind 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Or any woman IMO, it seems like Lucy is not interested in sharing. FC just happens to be the particular woman you were with at the time of this drama.

[–]jason1009 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Being "prettier" is an immediate freak out to some women but it's a branch in the tree of "another woman being better".

A long time ago, a woman told me she wanted to see other dudes. I said go for it, but I was going to see other girls. A few months go by and she asks if I'm dating. I respond of course. She starts asking questions. Once the word DOCTOR comes out of my mouth, she IMMEDIATELY starts the "let's get together" game. She wants to come see me, she wants to cook for me, she wants to hang out, she wants to stop seeing other dudes, everything. I kinda shrug her off into oblivion and feel extremely grateful for doing so.

[–]CornyHoosier 3 points4 points  (1 child)

I had a woman try something similar to Lucy.

She then proceeded to yell outside my window at 2:00am and key'd my car when I wouldn't let her in. Why? Because she was drunk and "really wanted to fuck" and I was being an asshole for not letting her in my home.

I swear ... she called me the next morning to see if I was sorry for being an asshole to her. I hung up the call and got the police out to do a report and submitted it to insurance. The stupid ass literally texted me that she key'd my car so I just showed that to the cops.

The best part was when the deputy who came out to write the report told me I needed to get better at "filtering out the crazies".

[–]Kathulos 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can't help but wonder if he would have been so callous with a female victim of domestic violence. Now listen dear you need to get better at filtering out the abusers. Edit:spelling

[–]massivewang 4 points5 points  (7 children)

Isn't the answer to question number 2:

Both A & D.

She's crazy and feels justified.

[–]Hemp420 6 points7 points  (0 children)

The correct answer to mutiplec choice questions is the best answer. Answer D explains answer A and also applies conceptual knowledge; therefore it is the correct answer.

[–][deleted] 2 points2 points

[permanently deleted]

[–]massivewang 1 point2 points  (3 children)

It's not meant to be dismissive.

Some bitches are crazy, clinically diagnosed crazy. Some are BPD, some have narcissistic personality disorder, etc.

I've seen a good friend date CRAZY bitches. I've also seen him date not crazy women. There is quite a difference in the way they behave. One set pulls all kinds of crazy ass stunts as noted in the story, the other set does not.

Yes the tenants of game are true, dread, hypergamy, preselection, etc, I'm not arguing that. What I'm saying is that there are women who aren't crazy who don't pull stunts like this.

[–]EnragedParrot 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Just cause they haven't pulled stunts like this in your presence doesn't mean they aren't crazy.

[–]massivewang 1 point2 points  (1 child)

True, but again not every woman is has narcissistic personality disorder, is bi-polar, etc.

There's AWALT and then there's being clinically crazy, and not all women are clinically crazy. This is spoken by someone who has a narcissistic mother. If I told you a tenth of the shit she's done in my lifetime you wouldn't believe it.

[–]EnragedParrot 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think when we say "crazy" we really should be saying "even more irrational than the next woman".

You know, the one who goes yelling and screaming at you in public, or keys your car, would fuck you and then cry rape to get back at you.

Not clinical crazy - that's a whole 'nother set of issues.

[–]1runnerrun2 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Crazy when she is doing what women are designed to do?

[–]Regularguygamebrah 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Ommy. You cold bro.

This is why I'm 3 mns into TRP and I'm not jumping into spinning plates. You gota have it internalized to lvl Ommy if you think you can dog bitches the way this guy does. And if you don't have your framed dialed into Ommy, the quiet church girl will do everything to ruin your life.

Shit is real out here. Good point LaLa.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (7 children)

I wonder what effect this encounter had on FC

[–]Swanksterino 11 points12 points  (5 children)

If FC is as fine as OP alludes to, none, and she's probably also spinning a few plates herself.

[–]TRPShill 5 points6 points  (4 children)

she didnt seem very threatened by the other girl

[–]Swanksterino 6 points7 points  (3 children)

not at all, she probably didn't GAF. She's got a line around the block. My point.

[–]TRPShill 5 points6 points  (2 children)

I agree. Not common behavior. Definitely spinning, probably very attractive

[–]Swanksterino 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And good for her, and OP, this is probably the prescription for a long relationship.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And I'd bet this isn't the first time she made an ex girl psychotic. My guess, women are deeply intimidated by very attractive peers.

[–]FrameWalker 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Totally expected the threesome

[–]huge_gap 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Fucking hilarious and on point as usual. I'm sure she'll find her way home in a few days/weeks when her orbiter/fuck buddy list is exhausted.

[–]OrangeCub 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing the FR. Lucy massively exposed her psychological problems, all just by you standing your ground. Indeed, way to dodge that bullet.

[–]ether_reddit 17 points18 points  (12 children)

Speaking as a former semi-hottie plate * who pulled this kind of shit occasionally, she did what she did because no one's ever called her on it and told/shown her that that's not okay behaviour. In other words -- it's always worked in the past, so it's been internalized as normal.

* semi-hottie days long gone. Settled down, found RP and look back on those days with horror, eyes now wide open.

[–]Drogba006 12 points13 points  (0 children)

It reminds me of something Patrice would say along the lines of "giving women another option on how to think, they don't consider a plan B in their mind because they've never had to"

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (10 children)

There are women on this sub? This the funniest shit ive seen

Edit: then again there are male feminists so its not that outlandish

[–]ether_reddit 9 points10 points  (9 children)

There are women on this sub?

Crazily enough, when women stop acting like lunatics, they manage to blend into the crowd just fine :)

[–]antariusz 24 points25 points  (5 children)

You blend in like hunter orange in the forest.

You went exactly ZERO posts without loudly announcing the fact that you are a woman and therefore an EXPERT on ALL matters pertaining to women.

She did what she did because no one's ever called her on it and told/shown her that that's not okay behaviour. In other words -- it's always worked in the past, so it's been internalized as normal.

I fixed your post.

If you were a man, you would have been expected to post it JUST like that. But you didn't, because you're a woman, and you CRAVE the validation. AWALT (EVEN THE ONES POSTING ON TRP)

You know why you didn't post it like that? Because it wasn't a very interesting comment, you might have gotten 4-5 upvotes at the most.

Also, besides that, it's actually terrible advice. It is NOT OP's job to FIX this plate's behavior. Engaging with her and "showing her the error of her ways" does not actually fix it. It just makes her SMARTER and MORE MANIPULATIVE. It does not actually change the underlying motivations.

[–]ether_reddit 0 points1 point  (3 children)

You went exactly ZERO posts without loudly announcing the fact that you are a woman and therefore an EXPERT on ALL matters pertaining to women.

Uh, hardly. I've been contributing to this sub for months. I didn't claim to be an expert on anything, not even this thing. I merely had something relevant to relate.

Also, besides that, it's actually terrible advice. It is NOT OP's job to FIX this plate's behavior.

I didn't say it was.

Calm down, cowboy.

[–]Senior ContributorOmLaLa[S] 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Just do your thing. Don't pick these fights. You'll blend back in. You're a sheep among wolves. Hide your wool.

[–]IronMeltsinmyHands 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i love your posts. always so educational and entertaining. you're like... Bill Nye the science guy. except, for redpill.

[–]BlackFallout 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I just wanted to say good job. I hope I don't lose frame when my time comes.

[–]Kafkaevsky 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I read it thinking you would allow her in, and tell her to go hide somewhere where she would not disturb you. My beta mind was thinking how could you leave her out in the cold alone, ignoring her even after fine china left.

But I snapped out of my beta conditioning and now it's all clear to me. Thank you for this /u/OmLaLa, these FRs put so much of what is taught here into context .

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children)

so legit question--- why not turn it into a "perform to get attention" on lucy's part to be let in... I would guess not worth it... could've been fun.

[–]Senior ContributorOmLaLa[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I'd have to worry if Lucy was plotting something if she passed. Plus she stepped outta line. If she did it once she'll do it again.

[–]DatYute 1 point2 points  (7 children)

How exactly do your plates know about each other? What I mean by that is do you just let them know your seeing other women vaguely? I get that it was an accident that she could actually identify FC, but the way you word it makes it sound like they know of each individual plate as opposed to you just arbitrarily telling them there are other women. If it's the former I can't ever see that being a good idea.

Hope I worded that properly.

[–]Senior ContributorOmLaLa[S] 0 points1 point  (6 children)

Depends. Some know each other individually some just know there are others. I give my plates nicknames though so they only know each other by those. And no I don't call FC by FC or Candy by Candy.

[–]DatYute 1 point2 points  (5 children)

So you tell them your gonna be with FC, candy or whoever?

[–]Senior ContributorOmLaLa[S] 0 points1 point  (4 children)

That's not what I call them in real life but yeah. I do. It's good dread. Lucy’s the only one whose showed up out the blue like that.

[–]DatYute 1 point2 points  (3 children)

I see. Like I mentioned in my first post I don't see how that could be anything but disastrous, but you are far more experienced than me and have results to show its effectiveness.

Doesn't it come with a plethora of shit tests?

[–]Senior ContributorOmLaLa[S] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Depends on how you say it. My voice deep so it works for me. Wouldn't recommend it for everyone.

Not many shit tests. We've usually been at it awhile by then so I'm sure they have an idea.

Tell them something like,

"I'm fucking other women. If you have a problem with that nows the time to speak up."

Then they'll ask sex stuff like do I use condoms or how often or if it's one of their friends. I answer these truthfully but I'm short about it.

"Yes. Daily. Brenda."

Three most common shit tests:

  • "Why so many?"

  • "Why me? You have others."

  • "Are you gonna have time/room for me?"

After those and the questions I know she’s a plate. Or if they fuck me again after knowing. Either or.

[–]DatYute 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I see. I believe in letting it be known your fucking other people, but I don't get into names or anything like that.

[–]Limekill 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"Are you gonna have time/room for me?"

you just have to wonder sometimes...

[–]An_All-Beef_Engineer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I step outside to smoke. Surprise surprise. Lucy’s still in the parking lot. I don’t look in her car’s direction. I finish my smoke, lock my doors, ignore my phone and sleep.

/u/omlala didn't you question her sanity at this point? That is insane.

[–]EnragedParrot 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Surprised you didn't tell her she could stay if she didn't speak and joined in the fun.

That was the first thought I had.

Though in hindsight, it may have rewarded her behavior.


[–]ApiVat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dude I just love your stories and the values they provide. Please keep em coming

[–]Drogba006 0 points1 point  (8 children)

Just a few more details.

How old are you? How old are the girls? What is it that brings you value that allows you to get away with these things towards the girls?

Not just any guy can do this, I'm interested to know a bit of how you got to the point where you're shutting the door in a crazy bitches face and she still wants it.

[–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (7 children)


What is this?

[–]Its_the_other_tj 3 points4 points  (1 child)

I don't think he's asking "how can you do this" in an accusatory way. More like how can i reach the level where I have a beautiful girl in my home and another girl is trying desperately to take her spot. How to be that wanted. My best guesses for funsies. Lucy is young (early 20s) FC is slightly older (mid 20s) and OP is slightly older then both (late 20s early 30s). The answer to the last question is strait red pill side bar stuff. Work out, dress well, maintain frame, be confident, get comfortable talking to women, etc etc.

[–]Drogba006 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You got the tone. It wasn't accusatory

[–]Drogba006 1 point2 points  (4 children)

I see the way I wasn't deflecting, because I was asking from a place of curiosity, not attacking his credentials

[–]EnragedParrot 1 point2 points  (3 children)

allows you to get away with these things towards the girls?

Can you understand how the choice of phrasing (bolded words) could infer tone/paradigm/perspective regarding Omlala's actions?

Mind, I'm not accusing you either, just trying to show how perspective shines through in the words/phrasing we use.

And to reiterate what others have said, it really comes down to owning yourself, and valuing yourself above the antics of women/anyone.

Someone who is self-possessed is attractive - to both genders.

PS. I've worked with and for some incredible leaders, and even as a hetero male I recognize their allure.

[–]Drogba006 0 points1 point  (2 children)

I'm interested in his process

EDIT: I know what I wrote. This is the internet, so when I question someone it means I'm attacking their platform until otherwise stated.

If I could go back, I'd write the same thing

[–]EnragedParrot 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Ok, you want it that way?

I was giving you an out before, but not now: you were attacking with those words, and your weasle words just now are more evidence of it.

Own it.

[–]Drogba006 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wasn't attacking. But keep on keepin' on. Alpha male

[–]aa223 2 points3 points  (8 children)

“Treat every woman like a loaded gun”.

A compelling reason to have more gun control.

But as for your situation you handled it very well as expected. I mean the only thing that was missing from this was a heavy pouring of rain to really make this dramatic. I can't wait for your next post on how you nexted a girl like that (Lucy not Fine China).

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (5 children)

You mean trigger discipline, right?

[–]FRedington 2 points2 points [recovered]

"Gun Control" means hitting your intended target.

[–]aa223 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are you sure it doesn't mean making your gun automatic in such a way where it will obey your every whim by just issuing a series of commands?

[–]splitfires 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Obviously lied to get your attention. I've never known a set of people in open relationships where everybody was honestly satisfied. At least one person is settling and struggling with it. She was insecure and likely very pained at the thought of you being with another woman due to some form of attachment she felt towards you or another. It's human for her to hope that her feelings weren't unreciprocated. Definitely not a dignified move on her part, and in her desperation she tried to relieve her suffering by any means she could manage. Honestly don't know what else you're acting like you could have expected.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

OP why did you say

chinas here

what's wrong with saying "working" or "busy with family" they always work for me. It's just that telling a plate I'm busy with another plate is the last thing I would want to do.

[–]Its_the_other_tj 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Not op but I used to do this. My gotos were family stuff or guys nights. Worked for a long time. 2 reasons not to do it. 1 You can slip if you forget what bs excuse you gave last time (or the dozen other times, they are keeping notes... Trust me) and 2 if they are ever around your friends/know your friends and or family they might start to probe them or their lady friends (so did they have a fun night out shooting pool?). Long story short the fewer actual lies you tell the easier it is to keep everything strait. Bonus points for it making the woman want you more if she doesn't go off the rails like OPs plate did.

[–]EnragedParrot 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Plus - telling a lie puts you in THEIR frame.

Telling the truth reinforces YOUR frame.

fuck em. This is what I'm doing - I ain't lookin for your approval.

[–]Rasalom72 -3 points-2 points  (13 children)

Missed an opportunity for a threesome maybe?

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