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Rant/VentingWhen you tell them you are upset, 70% don't care and the other 30% are glad you are down. (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by [deleted]

They don't want you to be good. They don't want you to be great. They want you to be shit so when they look at you they can feel better about themselves.

When you say you want to start your own company... they say just get a 9-5.

When you start seeing results at the gym... they say you are too obsessed with your appearance.

When they see you start making the real money... they say don't work so hard.

When they see you pulling multiple fine ass hoes... they say just settle with a nice average one and marry her.

When they see you trying to succeed... they are rooting for you to fail.

Don't give them that envious satisfaction.


[–]sorceryofthetesticle 85 points86 points  (8 children)

If you're the kind of person who is self conscious, who often takes unsolicited criticism from other people seriously, self doubting, etc. You will do very well for yourself to think of EVERYTHING as a shit test. Subtle hints that you ought to slow down? Shit tests. Praise from someone who doesn't understand your struggle? HUGE shit test. You got to put on blinders and relentlessly pursue your interests to the detriment of giving a shit what other people have to say.

[–][deleted]  (2 children)

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    [–]sorceryofthetesticle 3 points4 points  (0 children)

    It's been working for me lately, especially my frame at work. I'll do a writeup with results in a few months. Preliminary results, it makes focus and decision making easier when you can treat all distractions the same eg. With amused detachment.

    [–]dresdonbogart 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Seriously "keep you on your toes all the time". It's an effort, but the sense of control gives me a sense of calm that I cannot achieve any other way.

    [–]Stythe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I wish I had known this 10 years ago.

    [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

    Yeah this is really good advice, and I would add just agree and amplify on a lot of it.

    "yeah, you're right, I'm crazy to go to the gym, can you imagine somebody actually trying to work out and become healthier. That's just crazy talk. See you when I get back"

    [–][deleted]  (1 child)

    [deleted]

      [–]ScoobyGang 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      I agree but at the same time if you grab your gym bag and leave you put off more of a amused controlled demeanor. A deflection rather than a sensitive backlash.

      [–]Endorsed ContributorMeat-on-the-table 110 points111 points  (14 children)

      Women speak;men do. When they tell you that going to the gym is for losers,or whatever shit they might--just nod, say "okay" and pick up your gym bag and go.

      [–][deleted] 59 points60 points  (2 children)

      I agree with you. The post is actually referring to all people and not just women because I think lots of men, and even your own friends, will drag you down when they see you ascend.

      [–]TheRedStoic 46 points47 points  (1 child)

      Crab barrel mentality.

      Success reminds failures of their own failures.

      It is easier to condescend then to change yourself.

      Since it is easy, expect it to be the most common choice of action (or inaction).

      Nice and succinct reminder, thanks! We need these every once in a while.

      [–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      Plus when you try and improve yourself, you are trying to raise yourself in the pecking order of society, and people will try and slap you down for your temerity. Peasant stay where you belong.

      [–][deleted]  (7 children)

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        [–][deleted]  (2 children)

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          [–]unicorn-carousel 5 points6 points  (1 child)

          Also, the simple implication of picking up a gym routine to women... 99% of the time a girl starts going to the gym only when she wants to wrangle a new pony, so coming from a girl who's getting your provisioning (time, resources) already it makes sense to discourage attracting competition.

          [–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

          If she isn't sexually attracted to you, a woman will cast shade on whatever activity you are about to embark on.

          [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          yup.

          especially if they are lazy.

          [–]redfallhammer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          This has happened to me with more than one LTR, but not with short term relationships. Read into that what you will.

          [–]1musicdude -1 points0 points  (0 children)

          Yeah I don't believe that would actually happen, makes no sense.

          [–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

          This! You have to show them you live by your rules and not their's. Be ready because once they realize this they can fight like a dying animal before they accept this.

          Its a lot easier if you don't give them any value in your decision making from the beginning.

          Think of them more like a dog. When you bring a puppy home its a lot easier to train it to pee/poop out side if you don't let the puppy have an accident at home, take them out every 3 hours and in few days it becomes a habit to only pee/poop on the grass. Women are no different then highest functioning animals, you have to not show them any other way and your path becomes a lot easier.

          But if you make a mistake and show them they have power over your decision making. Its going to be a fight to regain control because they have seen what you are capable of and are will try to hold on to that power.

          Worst is for people who are trying to break out of BB mind set and into Alpha with women they have been beta with. There is an expectation of behavior from an subconscious and from a conscious on both sides and thus the its double hard for the men to change his habits.

          Create a "New Normal".

          God's speed. #slinging

          [–][deleted] 21 points22 points  (2 children)

          Keepin it G ain't nothin, you ain't gotta like it cause the hood gon' love it.

          As someone who spent the better part of a decade working 10 million shitty jobs and moving every year to find a worthwhile career this hits home.

          I finally landed a good gig with sham hours and great pay. Everyone in my office is great and I sincerely love them like friends. I stand out just for doing the small things that I do anyway. It should be noted that I'm the youngest person in my office by 15 or 20 years so maybe they're thinking of marriage 1.0 or 1.5.

          I started to drive a nice car a few months ago and you wouldn't believe the shit I get for it. Here are a few:

          Don't work so hard

          Make sure to balance your life

          Don't end up rich and alone (I'm glad they think I'm going to be rich, that's a good sign)

          Money isn't everything (my fucking favorite since it always comes from filthy rich people).

          Stories about the one that got away because of work (not realizing the favor that was done for them)

          Don't burn yourself out

          There's only 2 seats in there, where's your family gonna sit?

          You'll grow out of it (I'm in my 30s)

          Many, MANY more. I'll share them if I remember. Of course none of that even makes it to my brain through the wads of cash stuck in my ears.

          [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          This a good one! Just do what makes you happy man, not that I'm telling you what to do, but you know... :)

          [–]foldpak111 45 points46 points  (25 children)

          No one is on my side...

          Just the way I like it.

          I became homeless on purpose while making $27/ hr to save up enough money to make shit happen. A bit extreme, I know, but there is no price too great to see what I have planned through. I only slow down to get my 8 hours and I won't let up. Godspeed.

          [–][deleted]  (1 child)

          [deleted]

            [–][deleted]  (1 child)

            [deleted]

              [–]TheSelfGoverned 6 points7 points  (0 children)

              Probably his car.

              Rice and ramen.

              [–]unicorn-carousel 4 points5 points  (11 children)

              I was thinking about this this morning... I pay $1600 for a fucking bedroom in a house full of BPers. With an adult diaper subscription and some freshly tinted windows on my car, I could sleep by the park and continue my daily shower-at-the-gym routine with as-many-times-as-needed daily laundry service, no-problem. Then I could blog about it. RED PILL IN PARK DAWG.

              [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (2 children)

              Holy shit where do you live? Is that normal cost of living?

              [–]Endorsed ContributorRS73 1 point2 points  (0 children)

              I'm guessing San Francisco Bay Area.

              [–]unicorn-carousel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

              Yea, it's on the cheaper side actually... SF. Takes money to get money, or something... adult diaper idea, still sounding good. Plumbing for night poo is the biggest issue of being homeless, otherwise shower and everything else is taken care of by luxury gym+laundry membership.

              [–][deleted]  (6 children)

              [deleted]

                [–]unicorn-carousel 1 point2 points  (3 children)

                I love the idea, I know where I'd park it... I should probably just do it, could probably secure a loan tomorrow and pay it with saved rent in a few months. All I'd need is a permanent address to get the right parking permit. I do daily gym anyway, so nobody would ever know and I'd have a better view outside... hmm... I could do with a year of occasional harassment from police or whatever it'd cost in fines. Should make a thread about it when you do.

                [–][deleted]  (2 children)

                [deleted]

                  [–]unicorn-carousel 1 point2 points  (1 child)

                  Many thanks. Lines up with what I've seen in my city as well. Tire marks, 72 hours, etc... but not too strict. I've parked my (compact, low, no view, argh) car in the zone where I'd set up camp for a year, so my parking game is strong. I love big trucks... thanks again >:). Live-on boats are also an option in my area, seen a few on craigslist. Also appealing.

                  [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

                  Holy fuck tits I'm getting an rv

                  [–]Scroph 5 points6 points  (0 children)

                  I recommend reading "Walden on Wheels" by Ken Ilgunas. It's about a college student who chose to (stealthily) live in his van in order to avoid falling in the trap of student debt. The book not only contains his philosophical insights on the matter, but also some strategies he implemented in order to practically survive on a low budget.

                  But since you're living frugally, spending money on books is probably not the best move for you at the moment. Ken has most of this information on his blog so I suggest reading that for motivation and inspiration instead of buying the book. Good luck !

                  [–]CornyHoosier 3 points4 points  (1 child)

                  No one is on my side...

                  Just the way I like it.

                  Never stop.

                  "When you were kids, you all admired the champion marble shooter, the fastest runner, the big league ball players, the toughest boxers. Americans love a winner and will not tolerate a loser. Americans play to win all the time. Now, I wouldn't give a hoot in hell for a man who lost and laughed. That's why Americans have never lost and will never lose a war. Because the very thought of losing is hateful to Americans."

                  [–]FinallyRed 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                  Everybody can take a page out of the Patton playbook

                  [–]Capitalistfloop 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                  Thank god theres other people out there that do this. All money in bro, good luck.

                  [–]Endorsed ContributorJamesSkepp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  Damn, that's some dedication there!

                  [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  I know your probably a pro at whatever you do(and awesome too btw..),but have you heard of runawayguide . net? Probably has alot of things you can use.

                  http://archive.is/xtJ1h

                  [–]Gorech1ld 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  Huh, that's actually pretty smart now that I think about it. Being homeless, you have very little to pay for, other than the occasional food and snacks, and just rationing the food wisely can really be a decent money saver as well.

                  [–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

                  Preach it, brother. They're only satisfied when we're miserable, overworked, broke and they're pumped full of drugs and botox on our dime.

                  [–]Benny757 6 points7 points  (0 children)

                  Life is a competition for resources. The low will desperately attempt to lower you. Mediocre loves to keep things half assed and mediocre. Then the mediocre don't have to compete so hard and can remain lazy.

                  Don't be lazy. Never be mediocre. Fuck em. Ride the tiger which is your life.

                  [–]ChrisBenRoy 5 points6 points  (1 child)

                  This thread didn't take the direction I thought it was going to take, but still great info and all true. What I was thinking was that you were going to say how no one gives a shit if you're feeling depressed or low for whatever reason. At the end of the day, even the most alpha of man is still human, so he can have times where he's feeling down. As I'm growing myself and becoming a better me, I'm finding that even w/ my closest friends, even my own brother, if I start to vent or lean on them for support if I'm going through something, they clam up, seem to not care and would rather stop talking to me. I can talk to a friend of mine for hours about ridiculous bullshit that has no bearing on anything, but start talking about anything that's bothering you and conversation comes to a screeching halt.

                  [–]maxbrooksmacbook 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                  You have shitty people around you. People tell me their problems all the time and I help them by listening intently to their issues while usually not offering any advice unless they genuinely seek it.

                  [–]a_chill_bro 6 points7 points  (1 child)

                  Women don't really want you to fail. It's in their best interest to be with a successful man who wins all the time and is getting bigger and stronger every day.

                  They don't want to see all the hard work that has gone into everything. They want to believe that your success in life is natural, not engineered. Of course we know better than that.

                  Seeing you fail so they can feel better about themselves only works in their favor if they can branch swing to a better man.

                  [–]Senior Endorsed Contributormax_peenor 9 points10 points  (0 children)

                  Women don't really want you to fail.

                  They want to weed out the failures, even if they are already married to one.

                  [–]Poster_Porter 8 points9 points  (5 children)

                  What in the world was my ex-girlfriend talking about when saying I should make my own company then?

                  Only thing I could think of is that she found me so vile and beta that she was having to tell me straight to my face what she found alpha.

                  [–]luckysonagun 30 points31 points  (2 children)

                  She was saying "yesss bring me more beta bux"

                  [–]marty2k 0 points1 point  (1 child)

                  Wrong. Unless this woman was a complete retard (compared to most women), she would have seen the risks. What women want from a beta more than money is consistency. Gambling is for the alphas, her beta better have a nice job with good security and benefits.

                  Women want business owners who are established. They don't want to go through the 24 hour work days with nothing to show and the constant risk of losing everything just for a beta.

                  [–]luckysonagun 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  If she has orbiters of equal value to fall back on, why not manipulate a beta into risking it all? She has nothing to lose and a lot to gain.

                  [–]Luis_McLovin 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                  Alpha fux, Beta bux. Sounds like you played the betabux role in the relationship, she wanted you to better provide for her.

                  [–]harami_number1 6 points7 points  (1 child)

                  I'm assuming this refers to people in general and not just women?

                  [–]5t3fan0 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                  yes, both sexes are truly equal in this behaviour.

                  "we all want you down here with us in our mediocrity, because to drag you down its easier than to lift ourselves up"

                  [–]bleed-red 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                  This is true of everyone around you, don't fool yourself with those who can slightly conceal it.

                  "so they can feel better about themselves"

                  The absolute truth.

                  [–]Vigilo_Infinite 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                  This is something I learned the hard way.

                  When you improve, people will hate you. When you get a prettier girlfriend or a raise at work, they will hate you. When you succeed, you give off the covert message that you are better than them.

                  All you can do is be consistent in being a decent human being - spending your time with people who mean something to you because they will appreciate that vulnerability and respond in kind.

                  That's how true friends are gathered - ones who are secure enough in themselves to not get jealous and not see a line of criticism with your actions. Those are the strong ones and the ones worth keeping.

                  [–]IronMeltsinmyHands 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                  I don't need anybody's help.

                  • Vegeta

                  Honestly, I never got along with my father when I was younger. All my strength came from just one anime character.

                  [–]supersonic-turtle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                  I have been working on a phrase for myself and for others who start to feel down on themselves "the world is not out to get you its just out to help itself " which is true, as a man if you want something you have to go get it, sad but sometimes people are stepping stones and shit rolls down hill so do your work the best of your ability and try like hell to make it life work for you.

                  [–]swordfish1985 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                  I agree with you too, got all those comments from everyone guys and girls like

                  [–]Purecorrupt 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                  I don't usually get these talks, but I have observed them.

                  I was getting dinner with my folks last weekend after helping them move stuff. I was sitting outside chilling next to another family. There was a fat couple and I presume the male's sister along with 3 kids under 10.

                  The couple was extremely obese. The guy was about my height ~5'9" and if I had to guess... Near 300lbs. My dad's slightly taller than me and fat and weighs 240 or so I think my estimate holds. This guy was just fat head to toe. His wife was a similar ratio, but closer to 5'0".

                  At one point sitting down one of his kids ignores him hard about staying in one area / spot. He started to mumble to himself and his wife "oh look he's not listening" and acted like he was going to do something later. I sort of cringed.

                  Now the sister or other female was not fat. In fact it seemed like she may actually be active. She brought up going to the gym and the fat wife immediately said "You don't need to go to the gym look at you".

                  Holy fuck my brain melted.

                  The fat wife went on to passively shame her husband talking about how they (he) needs to go to the gym and some comments about his feet in whatever shoes he was wearing.

                  [–][deleted]  (2 children)

                  [deleted]

                  [–]FeeFeeFeaster 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  Speaking of females; dating in your 30's is fucking horrible. God it was so easy when I was 22. Now, whether they want to fuck on the first date, or even after just meeting me, it seems every single one falls in love within a week and starts talking about serious future plans, or me meeting their kids, or wanting to meet my kids.

                  Are you talking about dating women in their 30s? If so, they can talk about those things all they want and you are under no obligation to do a damn thing about it or otherwise comply.

                  You can try to minimize those things by entirely ignoring (from a dating perspective) every woman over the age of 26.

                  [–]RPsage 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  Fucking pathetic crabs in a bucket.

                  These people would rather be the best on a shitty team rather than the worst on a good team.

                  [–]1favours_of_the_moon 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                  When they KNOW they have genuinely hurt you, they get tingles.

                  [–]jamest0001 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                  Who is they/them you are speaking of?

                  [–]PabloEscoba 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  It's called mate gaurding. It's a sign you're doing something right. Same when women start shaming you. Embrace it & dont give two shits about it.

                  [–]FakeGuru 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  There is no reason to tell people what you want to do.

                  [–]TheRabbitTunnel 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  Correction, 100% of them will see you as beta and lose attraction towards you.

                  [–]lawrencewidman 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  like fellow mice pawing at you as you attempt to escape the cage you are all in no matter what.

                  Sorry for the negativity ;)

                  [–]2 Senior Endorsed Contributorvengefully_yours 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  If you get better, she knows you can do better than her. She will have competition and have to work to keep you. She wants you to provide more, but not be stellar in any other way, because then she might lose your provisioning.

                  [–]deeman010 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  I can't agree with this though, "When they see you start making the real money... they say don't work so hard."

                  My great grandfather, literally, was either a president or was on the board of 20 or so companies. He died from exhaustion in his 50s and all of it came crumbling down. I'm not saying that earning a boat load of money is bad though. I'm saying that you should watch your health cause your family of spoiled rich kids won't know what to do and they'll probably lose everything you earned in a generation or two.

                  [–]LeetButter6 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  Everyone wants you to succeed, just not more than them.

                  [–]Enjoyitbeforeitsover 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  Huh, what kind of bitches are you guys pairing up with? Is this a joke? Why would you even hook up with someone that doesnt respect your choices? The only time any of this shit is tolerable is if your spinning. Otherwise wtf are you expecting?

                  [–]1991Kira 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  When you start seeing results at the gym... they say you are too obsessed with your appearance.

                  "Obsessed" is a word used by the lazy to describe the dedicated.

                  Don't give them that envious satisfaction.

                  The sad fact remains that there will be people in this world who will envy you no matter what you do or how little you have.

                  I just say fuck them and do what I want.

                  [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  Why are you telling the world your problems? No one cares, and this 'lesson' is the world telling you that.

                  Learn to listen

                  [–]TheMGhandi -1 points0 points  (0 children)

                  When you are annoyed with them, yet still are capable to speak in a calm tone...they say you're mad and dismiss everything you say.