OP asks how to protect his house and investments in case of divorce. AskMen calls him a paranoid misogynistic shitlord. Welcome to male feminism. (self.TheRedPill)

submitted by needsomehelp3211


[–]Modredpillschool 183 points184 points  (23 children)

They use shame to stigmatize any action that's in your benefit as a man. This is much like the paternity test issue. Whenever it comes up that a man wants a paternity test, the woman (guilty of cheating or not) will get upset because it means he doesn't trust her and so she refuses to do it. Her friends back her up. The stigma is so ubiquitous that you can basically expect a negative backlash for even attempting a paternity test.

Never mind the fact that you're signing a government paper attesting to knowledge (I am the father) that you can't possibly know without a test.

The idea here is, of course, that most women probably didn't cheat, but they've successfully given cover to the ones who do. There's a reason our species evolved concealed ovulation, it was advantageous for alpha fucks, beta bucks.

Control the message, control the culture, get what you want. Make the very consideration of male interests a crime, ensure a big payout when you do decide to cheat/divorce.

Every time this happens, look who benefits. The feminine imperative works to give maximum options to women.

[–]Eyes_Of_The_Dragon 49 points50 points  (9 children)

but they've successfully given cover to the ones who do

When I first started talking to women about my ex and my plan to divorce her, virtually every woman I talked to assumed that I was bored and a complete asshole, and not the real reasons, basically I was sick and tired of her bullshit. Only when they heard all the details did they even consider that I was in the right. If all women are going to assume that all other women are saints (at least when a man is involved) then we get the red pill.

[–][deleted] 44 points45 points  (8 children)

That's actually not true. THEY KNOW she is full of it. I have sisters and many aunts bro. They showed me the truth.

They hate all women, think no girl is good enough for me, assumes all women are liars or they just want to get pregnant and leech, and they assume all women are lazy worthless or cheaters.

Those ladies know the deal. They just realize that when it comes to men vs women they will always side with women cause of self preservation.

Had you been a girl, they would tell you how horrid that other chick really is.

[–]Auphor_Phaksache 57 points58 points  (4 children)

Of corse they know. Which is why every girl says "I'm not like other girls." That is literally their admission that women are pretty messed up.

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (3 children)

"Hi miss. Oh no no no! Don't worry. I'm not like other guys! I'm different. "

Oh god that sounds horrid. You realize how fucked up it is when you actually put yourself in the position to say it.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (2 children)

If you really are different, you really won't have to say it at all. It will be obvious.

[–]thechariot83 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Girls used to tell me, "You're not like other guys." and I never knew why. Over time I realized it was because I never put the pussy on the pedestal. A lot of chicks have never met a guy that doesn't fucking swoon over them. Sometimes, that's really all it takes to separate yourself from the lot.

[–]Eyes_Of_The_Dragon 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Your family shares your genes, the women I talked to did not share my genes.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

If you think being related to a woman changes anything, you have a lot to learn.

Show you have a lot to offer and watch how many women will start to disapprove of whoever you are dating.

A girl from waaaay back had so much shit to say about the mother of my son and the woman never even met the girl. They don't even live in the same country.

Yet she was telling me so much nonsense about how this chick was using me and lying about the paternity.


Cause all girls are like that so that is her default stance. She just let me know cause she wanted me.

[–]Eyes_Of_The_Dragon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It does change some things. Such as in confrontations between a gf and my family, my family would always defend me. Within my family is a different story. It was quite startling to hear my sister yell at an ex gf about how awesome I am and then later same sister would try to screw me over within family matters. Been there done that.

[–]sickofallofyou 15 points16 points  (0 children)

They use shame to stigmatize any action that's in your benefit as a man.

“Never forget what you are, for surely the world will not. Make it your strength. Then it can never be your weakness. Armour yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you.”

[–]aanarchist 2 points3 points  (0 children)

In reality all its doing is diminishing their options and bottlenecking them into a single degenerate lifestyle choice , on top of giving society a serious anal penetration.

[–]haxurmind 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The stigma is so ubiquitous that you can basically expect a negative backlash for even attempting a paternity test.

Women should have problems with baby swapping in hospitals then. Its not like it really matters if the baby is yours or not, right? #Equality

For those who need it: /sarcasm.

[–]webleytempest 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Reminds me of sexual crypsis

[–]∞ Mod | RP Vanguardbsutansalt 1 point2 points  (1 child)

At least the thread got better...


[–]getRedPill 0 points1 point  (6 children)

There's a reason our species evolved concealed ovulation...

Uh, what's that. Is there other way that's not concealed ovulation? Care to explain.

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor 8 points9 points  (0 children)

ther way that's not concealed ovulation?

Most great apes do not conceal ovulation. They broadcast it with bright red butts and so on. Human females are literally built to deceive men way down in their DNA. They are even programmed to deceive themselves about ovulation.

If you are in a relationship with a woman, get a "Clue" and track her cycle. You will be astounded. She was not random and was never random. She is cyclical. But that is part of the deception.

[–]shhRP 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Some animals go into "heat" - dogs, for example. There are traits you can look for and studies have shown that men can subconsciously detect ovulating women, etc. but it is not immediately obvious like it is for many other mammals in heat.

[–]getRedPill -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Well, maybe it's because we humans wear clothes, perfumes, cologne, (aromatized) soap, shampoo, women wear (perfumed) make-up, etc, etc. Everything in our society has to colored, flavored and perfumed to the point is ridiculous.

[–]TheMountainWhoDews 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah like fish lay the eggs then the male spunks on them

[–]SoundMake 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I'd there other way that's not concealed ovulation?

Can someone translate this?

[–]edwsdavid 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Is there any way other than concealed ovulation?

That was harder than anticipated with the sentence structure and all.

EDIT: Is there an alternative to concealed ovulation? Is also an acceptable answer (question?)

I don't care anymore

[–]Rikvidr 33 points34 points  (1 child)

I would think you would divorce first, then buy the house or suck up losing half of it.

More great advice. "Just get over it."

[–]Endorsed Contributorredpillbanana 18 points19 points  (0 children)

It's all part of society telling him to "man up".

[–]chances_are_ur_a_fag 30 points31 points  (7 children)

honestly, I feel like that sub is halfway composed of women. also, the guy is a moron for marrying someone with no job or career. amazing.

[–]ECTD 12 points13 points  (4 children)

It's amazing, the guy is already fucked. consider a 2 year marriage, at most 2 years no job, AND finding out that this man wants a post-nup! Divorce Rape imminent... ffs it's like you can't get ahead or stay ahead, you're always left ducking and dodging the hits and can't prep (it's a sin apparently). Like the fact that most women would want you to fucking explain in in emotional terms (i.e. feelztm) why you'd consider a post-nup because everything is "perfect". This shit happens all the fucking time you read about it.

[–]writewhereileftoff 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm trying to figure out what this chick does whole day without kids or job. Probably spend his money on dumb shit, get fat and watch netflix.

Gets depressed because she is not doing shit and is unhappy. If she is smart she'll get a kid before the divorce rape.

[–]chances_are_ur_a_fag 2 points3 points  (2 children)

best thing he can do would probably get some jock to seduce his wife and get cheat on him and document it, then divorce her on adultery grounds with proof and hopefully not get fucked financially.

[–]ECTD 16 points17 points  (0 children)

That's if courts care about adultery. Most don't. It's a rigged system, over and over, there's no way you can protect yourself. The best example (that it's through and through) is common law marriage. Ten states recognize it, and that means you can get alimony out of the male and not even have been married. That's the type of feminist system we live in.

[–]sorceryofthetesticle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

California is no fault. Dude is done for.

[–]spicedncoke 1 points1 points [recovered]

You guys need to get with the times.

I used to follow Askmen back when it was more than just a website/online magazine way back when I started PUA in 2007. Commonly read articles from Doc Love, DeAngelo, etc. The place was slowly going downhill in 2009/2010.

I stopped reading for awhile, then started reading their forum when my last LTR was going shit. I swear that forum -- which no longer exists, as an extension of a sub that shall not be named. It was awful reading.

[–]chances_are_ur_a_fag 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I only read that sub if someone links to it on here. I'm a man and I ask myself

[–]I_Need_More_Space_ 28 points29 points  (3 children)

People will attack your "thinking" point of views or analytic views, because it exposes their own lack of foresight or analytics in their own life.

Men and women do this.

[–][deleted] 31 points32 points  (2 children)

this. Some people will even call you a robot for running basic cost/benefit analyses on things like marriage. The truth is people don't want to believe things will go wrong, they want the event to be unique and special. To think rationally about love takes away a lot of the mystique. Analyzing shit can be a buzzkill, but it's a necessary task

[–]I_Need_More_Space_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My day to day job is all about analysis, so the analytic approach has become a part of who I am. And I've done pretty damn well for myself. So, yeah. I think about return on investment all the time. I weigh risk to benefit. All these things are important to implement in the personal life. Sorry I don't let my emotions make decisions for me. LOL. That's how so many people live. They do what they "feel." Idiots.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Seconded (or third?) for both of these comments

[–]PissedPajamas 53 points54 points  (3 children)

These same men will suck it up and lose half their shit in court when they find their girls sucking Chad's dick just because "that's how life works". Their "cruel fate" as determined by the "mysterious forces" of the universe dealt him a bad hand, but it's not ever his own fault for being uninformed and unprepared.

The men of today are no longer men. It's sickening.

[–]chris_sydney 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Majority of men are wussies.

[–]Il128 68 points68 points [recovered]

Marriage counseling is the death nail for any marriage. First, 90% of the time the counselor will "want" to see you separately. This is so the counselor can help the woman feel good about her divorce and plan accordingly. The counselor will basically set the man up to be blind sided.

[–]cosine88 38 points39 points  (2 children)

I know a guy who seems like an incel but is a licensed MFT(Marriage and Family Therapist). So you will be getting advice from someone who is talking from zero actual experience.

And yes, this person will encourage her the two of you to "communicate" your problems.

[–][deleted] 10 points11 points  (1 child)

lol there are al ot of dorks that go into psyhiatry i've found

[–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Many people that enter psychology are interested in the field because they themselves have mental issues.

[–]2Overkillengine 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It can however, be something one can use to put on a good facade of "trying to work it out" to buy time while planning an exit strategy.

You know, like how women do.

[–]shelcod 5 points6 points  (1 child)

I always thought it would make more sense for the counsellor to tell the women her problems are justified and that they should try a bullshit idea for a week, and then when they come back the next week, try a new bullshit idea. That way they don't divorce and the counsellor can reap the rewards of a failed system.

[–]Il128 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Naw by being her Savior the counselor locks her in for years.

[–]WhyIsYosarionNaked 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Sorry to be pedantic, but I think that you meant death knell.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

No, this is not normal marriage counseling behavior. It is normal to have seperate and joint sessions.

However - I do agree that usually the counselors are more likely to be on the woman's side than the man's.

[–]scarletspider3 21 points22 points  (5 children)

I once experienced the same situation. I was talking to a older dude that told me previously that he was divorced and paying child support and alimony. In a conversation I mentioned that I'm not getting married because the risk of divorce and her walking away with my money was too great. That was basically all I said. He instantly starting saying how it was bigoted of me for not wanting to get married. You would've figured that a man that has been divorced raped would've learned something but apparently not.

[–]forcevacum 13 points14 points  (2 children)

I've nothing but contempt for someone who hasn't learned life lessons that were put on a plate for them.

[–]scarletspider3 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah I couldn't believe that he would say that. I thought he out of all ppl would agree with me. He also told me that he couldn't take an entry position in the field he wanted to work in because he can't make less money because it would violate the alimony agreement. Instead he has to go back to school to work in the new field so he could match his current pay.

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Even more it was put on a wife for them, not even a plate.

[–]I_Need_More_Space_ 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Shaking my head at all the repeat dumbasses out there.

[–]skoobled 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He wants to think he got 1 in a million unlucky. It's a coping strategy. Goes to show - home sapiens aren't rational. We tend to be rationalising (after the fact)

[–]TheRealMewt 21 points22 points  (5 children)

Honestly, I find that older generations are just rife with examples of blue pill behavior. The younger adults seem to be more analytical and more cognizant of statistics, trends, and behavior of intergender relations than their older counterparts (whether they act on this knowledge, on the other hand, is a completely different story). They're the group that thinks "Oh, we've been married for X amount of years. We're the example to follow." Then when they're asked how they're able to sustain their marriage it's always tripe such as "open and honest communication".

What their marriage length doesn't tell is the story of how often these men hate their lives, how henpecked they are by their wives, how they need to have "poker night" or a man cave just to get away from their harpy spouse for a half hour. What their marriage length doesn't say is that their loving wife is getting railed by their personal trainer while he's off at work or that the husband and the pretty new intern at the office are flirting up a storm. Funny how the checkered parts of marriage are never brought up when our sixty year old counterparts say "communication is the key to a successful marriage".

I'm always wary when I hear old people give me relationship advice. The Baby Boomers. The Gibmedats of our time. If they were a 20-something bachelor in today's era acting on their own elderly wisdom, they wouldn't last five seconds in today's dating game.

[–]howard333 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Women were still recognizably human in the 60's and 70's. Boomers were on easy mode for pretty much everything and don't realize it. So many examples of stories I've heard about how they thought it was tough when they were coming up... and they aren't shit compared to what anyone born after 1980 is going through.

[–]grewapair 6 points7 points  (3 children)

I'm a boomer and wholeheartedly agree. My boomer friends are literally clueless.

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorVasiliyZaitzev 9 points10 points  (1 child)

My boomer friends are literally clueless.

And greedy, selfish narcissists. Oh, wait, sorry...my GenX BoomerHate got loose. As you were. /grin

[–]321LTD123 6 points7 points  (0 children)

And greedy, selfish narcissists.

This can't be said often enough about most Boomers. They're all zoned out in front of cable televisions taking in that manufactured fiction as reality.

[–]Eyes_Of_The_Dragon 42 points43 points  (20 children)

The #1 thing he can do is talk to lawyers in the area he wants to live to see how their legal system may play out. Choose the least destructive court.

The #2 thing he can do is not buy a house and just rent, and that way it will not be an issue.

The #3 thing he can do is divorce her now while they have no joint assets.

Incidentally, if the house has a mortgage, and she wins it in the divorce, then she will immediately lose it if she cannot pay the mortgage. If it takes too long to get his name off the mortgage, she will destroy his credit in the meantime.

[–]INTJokes 13 points14 points  (17 children)

If he had signed a prenup would he be safe?

[–]xray777 28 points28 points [recovered]

Unless the wife has a law degree and had an independent attorney co-draft the prenup and have it blessed by the Pope himself, her lawyer will argue that you law-raped your wife by making her sign a legal document that her feeble woman brain couldn't possibly have understood thoroughly.

I'm not making this up. You and your wife can jointly hire a lawyer to write up a pre-nup, explain it to both of you, she signs it.....and four years later the judge will simply say that she did not know what she was getting herself into and you raped her by the fact that your money paid the lawyer to help you bamboozle another innocent houseslut who was caught with her panties around her ankles with Chad Jaurez, the pool amigo.

The only ironclad pre-nup is one where she has her own lawyer, independent of yours or your money (good luck with that) review the pre-nup and advise her of it before signing it.

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorVasiliyZaitzev 14 points15 points  (0 children)

You and your wife can jointly hire a lawyer to write up a pre-nup, explain it to both of you, she signs it

If one is going the pre-nup route, then she should have independent counsel, paid for by her (even if he gives her the money for it), and then the signing should video taped so she can't make a "coercion" argument, later.

Chad Jaurez, the pool amigo.

I LOL'd. Genuine chuckle.

[–]penis_butter_n_jelly 11 points12 points  (2 children)

You and your wife can jointly hire a lawyer

No reputable attorney would be willing to advise both parties because that is idiotic and unethical. No shit. This is like having the same person play the prosecution and defense in a criminal trial.

independent of your money

This is just misinformation. Whether you pay or not is immaterial. Note: you WILL pay for her divorce attorney.

RP is so full of misinformation and nonsense when it comes to prenups. Yes, absolutely, the family court system is totally against men, but there is a limit. Very few prenups are thrown out and I challenge you, challenge anyone here to find me even one that wasn't thrown out for one of the five obvious reasons any attorney would advise you of.

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor 0 points1 point  (1 child)

This is true about prenups. I haven't heard of post-nups as proposed by OP.

[–]penis_butter_n_jelly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You should get a postnup if you have a huge change in net worth after you're married. e.g. you will the lottery.

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (10 children)

No, Courts can ignore pre-nups for basically any reason.

[–]TRP VanguardtrpSenator 6 points7 points  (0 children)

No they still hold a lot of water. The problem is that lawyers have gotten really good at making convincing arguments on why to throw them out. The major one used these days is that if the prenup was signed under the condition that if she didn't sign it, she couldn't marry the man. Some courts see this as forcing her to sign under durress. Especially if the thing is dropped on her 2 weeks before the ceremony.

[–]penis_butter_n_jelly 17 points18 points  (8 children)

Courts can ignore pre-nups for basically any reason.

No, they can't. Just because family courts are stacked against men doesn't mean there are no limits to the insanity. There are very few reasons pre-nups are thrown out, and honestly, most of those reasons are pretty reasonable. e.g. You fraudulently lie or misrepresent your assets or what James Cameron did--have your drunk fiancee sign a pre-nup on a bar napkin at 2am the morning of the wedding.

Marriage is a financial merger. Why would anyone agree to it? I have no idea. But its pretty easy to color within the lines.

[–]forcevacum 0 points0 points [recovered]

It depends on where you live. It can be totally ignored in some places. Are you doing to run the risk that your local area is not one of those places in say, ten years from now?

[–]penis_butter_n_jelly 25 points26 points  (5 children)

It can be totally ignored in some places.

What places?

I challenge you, as I've challenged people on this sub 20 times before, find me a single case where a prenup was thrown out for a reason not on this list:

  1. You lied or fraudulently misrepresented your assets
  2. Both parties did not have independent legal counsel
  3. Absurd provisions (if you don't give blow jobs at least 4 times per week...)
  4. Improperly executed (not written, no time to review, no witness, etc, etc)

I wouldn't get married, but you're spreading misinformation. And your hypothetical is nonsense. Millions of prenups are upheld every year. Hypothetically in 10 years there could be a law passed that states if you haven't been married for at least 10 years, you're going to be subject to an additional 40% tax to support single mothers. Prenups following basic guidelines have always been upheld and currently are upheld. You hypothetical is as absurd as mine.

Edit I forgot one, if you don't reevaluate and sign a postnup if there is a significant change in circumstance. Say, you both sign prenup that she will get a max of $150K if you split. You're a mortgage broker and make $62K per year. 10 years later, you decide to start your own company because the market is good and it takes off. Let's say you now make $920K per year and this continues for a number of years. You're going to have to revisit the prenup and reagree on terms.

[–]welcome_to 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My ex signed an interspousal transfer deed (signing away all of her interest in my house) while we were married, and my lawyer had informed me that it's meaningless and she's going to be able to claim interest in my house anyway.

So, I understand where /u/forcevacum is coming from. Apparently family courts can ignore any agreements that were signed during the marriage if they're not advantageous to the woman.

[–]Luis_McLovin 3 points4 points  (0 children)

God damn I'd love to make shy of a million per annum.

On a serious note, did not know post-nups were a thing. Definitely keeping this is mind if ever crazy enough to pursue marriage.

[–]rp_newdawn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for taking the time to educate the community with your thoughtful contribution. The hive mind is a dangerous thing

[–]spicedncoke 1 points1 points [recovered]

Thank you. Excellent post.

However, one thing worth noting in Canada is that Pre-nups:

  • Do not cover the matrimonial home.

  • Do not cover child support.

So unless you have additional property, and make way more money than the spouse (why the fuck would you want to marry someone that had 0 income anyway?), getting a pre-nup is pretty well pointless.

[–]penis_butter_n_jelly 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't know anything about canada, but this wouldn't surprise me.

[–]getRedPill -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

No, they can't. Just because family courts are stacked against men doesn't mean there are no limits to the insanity.

Well in any crime or accusation burden of proof lies on the accuser. When is women vs men cases burden of proof lies on men (accused). That's officially fascism, which is officially insane.

[–]user_none 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Pre-nups do precisely dick for credit. Any mortgage or loan is outside the jurisdiction of the courts. Sure, the court can assign the debt tied to a loan to one, or both people in the case of divorce. However, the lender ultimately decides the fate of credit.

[–]ChadThundercockII 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The #2 thing he can do is not buy a house and just rent, and that way it will not be an issue.

Maybe buying the house in the name of a parent and live in it. Then when the parent passes away, you can inherit it.

[–]1Entropy-7[🍰] 16 points17 points  (2 children)

It sounds like you need a divorce now as you are clearly expecting one after you get into a house. You wouldn't be asking this question if you were married to the right woman.

The flip side of this is that not accepting a prenup is clearly a sign that the woman intends to divorce him so she can get the house. Apparently, hamsters only spin one way.

[–]Magnum256[🍰] 10 points11 points  (3 children)

Shit angers me so much I can't describe.

My friend went through some bullshit that concluded recently. We're in our 30s now, and have been best friends since the early years of elementary school. He was always a bit self-conscious, not necessarily confident (but more so in his head rather than for outward reasons), so when he was in his early 20s he met this cow of a woman, didn't share his sense of humor or his ambitions, the typical country girl who thought the purpose of life was to get married, have a lot of babies, and spend all her time raising those babies and enjoying family life.

My friend on the other hand was more of a techie/entrepreneur, he grew up somewhat poor so really sought after making money. He started his first business around the time he met the girl, he was very successful and was earning around ~$120k/year pre-tax by his second year. He ended up selling that business for a good deal of money, and started another one where he was earning ~$150k/year pre-tax but virtually hands-off for him, so he was basically set. He had the windfall from his first business being sold, and a steady income from his second successful one, hell he could have moved to Thailand and lived like a god for the next ~20-30 years without lifting a finger if he wanted to.

What ended up happening instead is that he married the fat bitch. She was supposed to be on birth control but 'accidentally' got pregnant, she was extremely happy though despite this life-changing accident. Then after that baby was born they agreed to be a single-child family, but she 'accidentally' got pregnant again, and she was super happy about it. After that my friend got a vasectomy but too late. Sometime after the first baby was born he bought a ~$500k house which he mostly paid off in one shot, think he put around ~$350k down on it initially.

So anyway they lived the family life for awhile, whenever I went to hang out with him it was awkward as fuck. His fat wife would call him a worthless piece of shit and call him lazy/bad father, etc. because she felt she was doing more to raise the kids (despite him being responsible for basically making their family rich and financially independent). It disgusted me and I told him so, he didn't have much to say, just looked sullen and half-heatedly agreed with me but in a kind of "what the hell can I do about it" kind of way.

This went on for a few more years and eventually he found out she was sucking the neighbors dick (some fit guy living with 3 roommates, about 5 years younger than my friend/his wife) and so filed for divorce. He ended up losing his house, sold his business and lost a big chunk of the proceeds, and basically had an emotional and mental breakdown, he seems like he's not the same person anymore, no spark or love for life, always semi-depressed. He ended up moving halfway across the country and took some $14/hour office job I think, don't talk to him as much anymore.

[–]Ozymanberg 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry about your friend, dude. That was hard to read. What saddens me the most is that his ex-wife is probably all fine and dandy and will fill the kid's head with how much of a "pussy" his dad was. The kid did end up with the wife, right?

[–]frys180 3 points4 points  (1 child)

That's heartbreaking. God dammit that shouldn't happen to anyone.

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This happens in about 1/3 to 1/4 of marriages. Yes, it really is that bad.

[–]wastagaswe 7 points8 points  (2 children)

OT: wtf is it with reddit and marriage counseling? Why are people so helpless these days that the best solution is always to seek a professional's advice?

I've always had a bit of a hangup about counseling in general. Perhaps it just me being my natural paranoid self, but don't counselors make more money the more often you show up? So is it not in their best interest to give me faux pick-me-ups so I keep coming to them?

When I was in college I was depressed and kept being nagged to go see a counselor by my dad and brother. I ended up going, and got assigned to some 28 year old lady. She suggested that she can help me get anti-depressants. Being someone prone to addiction, I said no ty. She proceeds to tell me "Yea those don't really work anyway, they just mask your problems." I'm thinking wtf, why would you suggest that then? That was the last time I went to counseling, needless to say.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I once had a licensed therapist tell me that an SSRI she wanted me to try would be helpful because it "has serotonin in it." It was scary how clueless she was about the meds she was prescribing.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

OT: wtf is it with reddit and marriage counseling? Why are people so helpless these days that the best solution is always to seek a professional's advice?

It's not marriage counseling specifically. The answer to nearly everything is go see a specialist. You see it in a lot of other places. Any kind of legal question? Consult a lawyer. Tax question that could be answered by typing it into google (or hell, even just looking at the form)? Get a CPA. Just to be clear, I'm not saying these aren't needed but you don't have to run to someone who charges $200/hr for everything.

[–]dbtng 14 points15 points  (0 children)

So, what's the problem? Call me a paranoid, misogynistic shitlord. I won't argue. Then again, I don't seek approval from people I don't respect.

[–]TRP VanguardtrpSenator 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I saw one a few days ago that was literally about a guy being cucked while his wife goes around fucking all sorts of other men, and it was killing him, because there was nothing he could do about it and for some strange cuck reason, he got off on the idea even though it was killing him inside.

Some dude chimes in with some sanity, suggesting that he's in a cuck relationship and that he needs to reestablish his masculinity within the relationship. That part of the reason she's fucking other men, is because her "man" at home isn't a real man who just lets her walk all over him. That it would be in the entire families best interest, including hers, if he would put his foot down, stop the nonesense and reestablish a healthy relathionship.

The fucking fellow cucks and SJWs came out in force. Trying to say how there is nothign wrong with him doing this, so long as it was agreed upon or some shit.

I dunno man, if you ask me, there is NOTHING okay with that. And him being cucked is a symptom of some serious issues which need resolve. But the SJW beta fucks will have none of that self improvement. Instead they just want you to accept their worthless pile of shit existance as is...

[–]saml01 5 points6 points  (0 children)

To be fair some of that advice is solid. He should have thought about protecting himself before marriage, whether dumping her because she brings no value or prenup. After the fact is going to ruin his marriage anyway so might as well divorce now, before big money gets in the mix. Any women will lose her shit if her husband brings home a post nup, especially one that sits on her ass all day(like ops, no job or kids) so may as well skip to the end.

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I do agree with breaking up with her, or not getting married. Why even get married? There is nothing sacred about it, and it's a setback. If she starts running her mouth if he's not officially married just get rid of her, or divorce her if he's married. I hope he prenuped that bitch. Marriage itself is pretty beta and a gross concept.

Also: Prenuptial and divorce means fuck all since she has the vagina. It will only matter if you got yourself a good Jewish lawyer. This is why you don't get married kids.

[–]herewegoaga1n 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I'm actually intrigued as to the actual answer(s) to this one. I would think setting up a llc company, trust, purchase/loan to a relative, or living will through a parent would be feasible.

[–]ggolemg2 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ugh, that makes my skin crawl.

[–]sh0ckley 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Fucksake. California is a community property state too. I don't think even a post nuptial agreement can save him. I hope he gets a divorce before it's too late.

[–]stemgang 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If he moves and she moves with him and both of them establish residency in a non-community property state, then he has hope.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Its really crazy how''hive mind '' affects people even if at their own detriment. Its like they literally dont notice their playing against themselves.

[–]trptwerp 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Apart from thinking that their relationship, and girlfriend are special, those bastards think that they are special. There is a reason why pride came before the fall! So many bastards think they are special and that they are the exception. As we all know, none of us are special. Those that think they are special are extremely average and cliche.

[–]Senior Endorsed ContributorVasiliyZaitzev 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Never ever go to "Ask Betas Over 30" with a problem.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

before they wake up, male feminists and betas are honestly as bad as women

They are worse than women by far. These are guys with the fervor of the newly converted and they're demonstrating trying to gain approval. It's a competition they're in. And they want to win it.

[–]The_Red_Paw 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Feminist males are not 'as dangerous as', they ARE the danger. Without whiteknights women would be back in the kitchen in 2 weeks. Women will not fight for their own rights, they get men to do the fighting for them.

[–]NutellaPancakeMan 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Those faggotnerds on that subreddit will bend over backwards so they can show their bulldyke landwhale friends, whom they have oneitis for, how "mature" they are for brownie points. What irks me the most is the immediate token response of "get marriage counseling". Are people that cucked that they'd rather pay someone money so they can get advice on how to be better slaves for their women instead of taking the initiative and talking things through with their wives like adults?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Since nobody answered the question, what can you do to protect yourself, especially when you are the sole income provider and your wife is considered a dependent?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (4 children)

FYI the proper answer on how to protect your assets is to have physical assets outside the reach of the banking / court system.

Gold or other precious metals are the perfect way to hide money.

No bank account to split up. No title to gold. It is anonymous wealth.

If you end up in a divorce, you sold your gold off for cash beer money, prove I didn't.

Gold is by far the easiest way to store and hide wealth, you are just at risk of the value of the dollar and or gold changing over time.

[–]frys180 0 points1 point  (3 children)

What about setting up a trust fund? Or sending your funds to a corporate account? Do those work as well or would she be entitled to corporate assets?

Also, in relation to gold, can you buy the gold in security assets or would you have to buy it physically?

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (2 children)

Anything on paper can be attacked, even a trust fund or a corporation.

Gold is anonymous wealth.

You have price change risk, storage costs, opportunity costs from no interest or yield (unless we are in a negative interest rate environment. . . .) to worry about. You also have theft to worry about. She could just steal your gold and say prove it.

Buy physical gold and store it somewhere safe with easy access for you. Store it somewhere where the courts and the banks can't reach.

[–]frys180 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Thank you. Your advice is priceless.

As an aside, gold's value seems to have maxed out in 2012. Hopefully, if I ever get to that point (don't plan on getting married regardless.) I'll catch it when the market is reasonably stable.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yea 2012 would have been a great time to sell, same as dang near every day until fairly recently.

Silver is an interesting play too, but much more volatile / speculative. Platinum looks good too. Ain't often it is cheaper than gold.

[–]marinewannabee97 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I always hated ask men for this exact reason. Prissy little pussys. I like askTRP because it's like a massive gym locker room or pub. You can ask pretty much anything without shame and it's wandered by real men from all walks of life.

[–]skoobled 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Stuff like this makes me wonder if there is a case for some smart and systematic "awareness raising" black knighting that could be done in such forums: expose misanthropy in the majority in order to swing those readers who are on the fence. In the case of this post, it would be readers in a similar situation to the OP, with the intention of making them think, "damn. People really think it's wrong that I want to protect myself against the worst possible outcome? That's crazy"

[–]InformalCriticism 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've heard it from Milo, that men at and below 30 are the ones who feel the Feminist pinch the hardest, and I've started seeing that demographic speak out in videos and examples like this. They are slowly understanding that men older than them have never seen women behave how they do today, so there is no sage advice for them. They have to put their mind in the forge and then to the grindstone to pull through, or risk being publicly torn apart for asking for help or voicing concerns as we see here.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Out of 34 replies the ones quoted are not even the top replies. It is reasonable to ask "Are you sure you married the right woman?" In this kind of situation. It is not a shaming question. People were even helpful in the thread, I don't get the bile here.

[–]Stythe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In a sense they're right. If he's looking to protect his investment he likely is, at least unconsciously, aware that things could go badly. That said, that advice reeks of jealousy.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (3 children)

Note to self. Never go ask advice from that subreddit.

I am a man. I am over thirty. I think those men are idiots.

it's like they don't care about themselves enough to preserve their wealth. That will change when they get divorced. Then we will see their sad little posts on the MGTOW forum.

[–][deleted] 1 points1 points

[permanently deleted]

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

I think you're hearts in the right place, but I disagree.

If anything, black men have it worse since "we" have few if any male role models. I literally have 2 male relatives in this country that are not in prison. One is 12, the other is 18. They look up to me, and I had no one.

Also, by age thirty , if you don't k ow the deal then chances are you are refusing to learn and ignoring the signs.

I was BETA like no other. Even in the army I was passed over for promotion and my joss literally said "You need an A type personality to lead. You are B type,"

So I speak from experience. If my ass can learn the truth via cold hard experience and just learning like a logical human, they have no excuse.

I turn 31 in August. If anything they should know better.

That is why I say they are stupid. They are not women. They are men. They should know better by now. They aren't kids.

[–]OneInAZillion 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I know we often say "they get what they deserve for being stupid with women" [paraphrasing] but I really do think this guy would benefit from a trip to our corner of reddit because for the love of fuck, our advice would do him loads more good than listening to those morons.

It could just save him.

[–]skoobled 1 point2 points  (0 children)

But he must find his own way here. Don't talk about fight club

[–]DeadSpool 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The white-knighting by betas in that thread makes me lose hope for the male gender.

[–]yomo86 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Let me tell you this. A prenup ist a contract imposed on a fixed institution. Whenever a judge sees fit he will let the underlying architecture break through. Equity, good faith, coercion take your pick to throw out a prenup. Why do Hollywood prenups hold up then you might ask? Well, the best lawyers money can buy draft them and none of the parties is dead poor.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

These men are naive. I can sort of understand why you'd think that it's shitty to do that if you genuinely believe that women are angels who can do no wrong. In that case "you got so lucky and you don't trust her? How dare you?" makes sense to them but is retarded as fuck because their core beliefs aren't aligned with truth.

[–]THE_Masters 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Jesus Christ why would you marry a girl with no income?? If I was to ever fuckin marry you best believe that woman's going to have an equal or close to my income or At least a college degree majoring in something useful.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly his situation is dumb. You should know the rules going in BEFORE you get married. Ask yourself if you are ready and want a legal contract with that person.(if you aren't having kids marriage is literally retarded). This person is an idiot who wants to put a condom on after he's already busted in her.....the damage is done. If anything this is an example of what not to do.

[–]OneInAZillion 0 points1 point  (4 children)

I got banned from that sub for posting the following reply, with no reason given, even though I'm pretty sure I was the top comment:

I'm going to go ahead and go against the grain here and give you some real, honest advice. Although it does look like some of the more ridiculous posts here are getting downvoted, which is nice to see.

Firstly, to the men in this comment section, I think you're all way too optimistic about marriage, and with divorce rates as high as they are these days and the overall way that men get fucked over in divorce at such a disproportional rate, I have no idea why you're all sitting on such a high horse in this regard.

Secondly, to OP:

You protect yourself by maintaining all that is yours. You are the SOLE provider and make 100% of the money. SO here is what you have to do:

  • Keep her name off the house. You are paying for it - not her, and just because you two are married doesn't mean that she is entitled to have her name on a lease she is not putting in a cent for. Furthermore, if shit hits the fan, you get to stay in the house that bears your name, and your name only, whereas if her name is attached to the house as well, the courts will inevitably and without fail reward her with it in the event of a divorce, leaving you to not only find another place to live but also pay for that house that you no longer live in. This is ESPECIALLY true if you end up having a kid with her.

  • If you need a joint signature, yes, go with your parents, and do not listen to their advice when they tell you that you are better off having your wife as the other signature. They're wrong.

  • Try to get a post-nup. You are the sole provider and this will ensure that you take with you what you brought into the marriage without having to surrender a portion of it for her if you do end up getting divorced.

If she is not okay with any of this, than it just proves her hypergamy and either she can suck it up and stay married or you should just divorce her before you two have kids. Trust me, you're doing yourself a favor to figure this out now.

One thing you have to realize is that there is a possibility that the two of you will call it quits and this is something you need to look into. Having her name on anything or giving her any equity in the marriage that isn't hers, that she hasn't paid for or earned is extremely detrimental to you, as a man, and will certainly cost you equity, meaning you will very likely be forced out of your own house in the case of a divorce, as I stated above (we all know how biased divorce courts are in favor of women - let's be honest here).

Any woman who isn't okay with having to sign an agreement stating that she can't fuck you over in court if this all goes belly-up is doing nothing but showing her true colors, and you're right to do everything you can to protect yourself. Women are absolutely ruthless when they're trying to take half of your shit and she will have no sympathy for you if and when you are no longer married.

Do not believe the fairy tales that you are being fed.

Protect yourself, and get a damn good lawyer for that post-nup.

So which rule did I violate?

[–]Endorsed ContributorBluepillProfessor 0 points1 point  (2 children)

You have a posting history in Red Pill Reddits.

[–]OneInAZillion 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Amazing. First offmychest, now an actual subreddit devoted to asking men for advice. Pathetic.

[–]hobohunter24 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He may have actually replied to your post before it was deleted. I checked his profile, and he stated this as a reply to one of the comments:

"Thanks a lot for the informative and detailed reply. It is definitely more helpful than some of the other comments. I pretty much agree with all your points:

I originally wasn't going to put her name on the house anyway, so no argument there. I will definitely try to put my parent's name on there, if nothing else, she will have to think twice about a long drawn out course case with huge lawyer fees. I will ask for a post-nup and see what she says. I would like to be protected but some of the comment seem to indicate California doesn't seem to care about post-nup. I will have to ask a lawyer about this.

Overall, great reply. "

It sounds a lot like he replied to you. Props, you did not go unseen haha

[–]hobohunter24 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As u/BluepillProfessor stated, it's probably because you have posts in Red Pill reddits. But I doubt they go and check every poster, however you kinda sounded a bit like one of us.

Choice quotes for the tell (which probably clued them in to check if you were indeed a rp'er):

"Women are absolutely ruthless when they're trying to take half of your shit"

"If she is not okay with any of this, than it just proves her hypergamy"

[–]Redpillc0re 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did anyone point him to TRP for this kind of discussion? Do your fellow man a favor and help him get real answers next time (using a throwaway obviously)

[–]Project_Thor 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Beta Hivemind" - That is well-put, Anyway to get this on your side? Usually it's ruled by control over women, We all know this can change by the second.

[–]PlanB_pedofile 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh those comments. "I never thought about divorce when I signed on my mortgage"

Well I did, and when divorce came i kept the house and was affordable under my income.

With divorce being 50%, this is shit you think about.

These fools dismiss a coinflip of a bet saying "oh it will never happen to me"

"If you need 6 months of emergency money in case you are unable to work, you shouldn't be getting a job" hear how dumb the sounds? But this is the advice in that thread.

[–]MajorStyles 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bumped into an old friend. Long story short, when I knew him, he was going out with some gal. Everybody in our circle had the "He Bad/She Good" mentality.

Now I found out the truth when the relationship has ended. Bitch cheated multiple times, ran him into debt, etc, etc.

Women want complete censorship regarding their actions.

[–]axxxman 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As an additional hilarity, the guy who says "It sounds like you need a divorce" and "prenup would never cross my mind" also humblebrags about his 6-figure salary.

I'm sure he is a fun guy to be around at parties...

[–]Yourmamasmama 0 points1 point  (1 child)

Okay as much as those beta bastards shit on this guy, I fully believe hat he deserves to be insulted at but not for the same reason. Why the fuck would you bring such important matters to fucking Reddit instead of a lawyer? A house costs so much more than a 1 hour meeting with a lawyer and its fucking stupid to post that question on ask men.

[–]juliusstreicher 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There may be lawyers on reddit. There may be people who have been in his same situation before that can point him in the right direction. A lawyer won't tell somebody how to hide assets illegally; someone on reddit may. HTF can one know if they even have a competent divorce attorney?

Work with instead of against OP, I say. (Unless, that is, you can get a good laugh at his expense!)

[–]chiozette 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lol? If you're scared she's going to wipe your bank account clean, don't marry her. This is a no brainer.

Financial situation is something I'll take into consideration when I start thinking about marriage.